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“And We All Shine On, Like The Moon And Stars And The Sun.”
– John Lennon
On the night of 1987 in the vast desert of Arabia, everyone in the crusaders made their tents. Polnareff tucked tightly into the think blankets he bought in India; Joseph and Avdol stayed in the same tent as Joseph had to hide Avdol away from Polnareff to assume his death.
Everyone was asleep except for Jotaro who stayed out of his tent. Jotaro refused to sleep as he was full of energy, he said, but in reality, he wanted to sit down on the large rock to look at the beauty of the night. He enjoyed the silence of the night.
Until it broke when he heard a voice from Noriaki Kakyoin. It was unusual as he was one of the early birds. Hearing him awake was peculiar for Jotaro.
“The stars are beautiful tonight, isn’t it, Jotaro?” Kakyoin asked. Jotaro was stunned by the red head’s appearance beside him, gazing at the beauty of the night too, he assumed.
Jotaro nodded and tipped his hat. “Go back to the tent, Kakyoin. We have a long journey tomorrow.”
Kakyoin shook his head and grinned. “Nope. I want to stay beside you for a moment.”
Kakyoin joined Jotaro on the rocks.
“What do you think about stars, Jotaro? Do you know that they shine brighter when there is no interruption of artificial light?” Kakyoin asked. Jotaro was perplexed by Kakyoin eventually question him something too complex to answer.
“I don’t know how to answer that, Kakyoin,” Jotaro sighed. He pointed at a group of stars, specifically to the brightest ones, “according to what I learned in school, the star that shined the most is the Polaris or the North Star.”
Noriaki nodded in agreement. “That’s correct, and what does the Polaris do to us, humans?”
“They guide travelers when they are lost in the sea or land,” Jotaro answered, His eyebrows frowned. “are you giving me review sessions in the middle of the journey?”
Kakyoin chuckled. Jotaro continued, “as if we will come back to the school alive after this end.”
“What are the metaphors you can come up with?” Kakyoin asked, ignoring Jotaro’s last sentence. “you can tell yours and I can tell mine,”
“I am not good at describing everything as implicit as possible,” Jotaro admitted, “but I always observe the stars whenever the night falls—just like the moon, the stars will follow you too, but it changed places because of the earth’s revolution. Some reappear but some disappear. It’s like life that people will come but only a significant number of them will come back to you.”
Kakyoin smiled. He was in awe of Jotaro’s observation. “I’d never thought that you are that observant in the skies. I thought you only like animals under the sea.”
“Good grief Kakyoin,” Jotaro chuckled, “just explain yours.”
“Okay, then,” Kakyoin cleared his throat, “but this will be too cheesy to hear.”
“Just say it.”
“Fine.” Kakyoin pointed at the North Star. “The North Star’s location is located at the top of the North Pole, which means it’ll always stay there. My mother told me that special someone in heaven is the Polaris. No matter where you go, they always watch over you until the day of your death.”
Jotaro didn’t think of that, but curious about why he brought up the topic of death in the middle of this deadly mission. Take note that Jotaro didn’t look at Kakyoin since he showed up. He was shaking at the statement that he wanted him to realize that they will go back home to Japan alive. At this point, he had to tell him what he felt for the young boy as this was the perfect time to do so.
“Kakyoin, don’t say that. We will come back home.”
When he faced quickly to the place where he assumed Kakyoin sat, the redhead wasn’t here.
No, that’s impossible, Jotaro thought as he panicked around his place, he must be here. He hopped down the rock and searched for him, but he wasn’t around. It was very peculiar that he disappeared without any sound of footsteps. He decided to look for him everywhere where he was hidden, but he couldn’t find the redhead.
“Kakyoin, this not a joke! This is not—”
“Jotaro.”
Jotaro glared at where the voice came from. At last, he saw Kakyoin, but he had a hole in his abdomen, but clean from the blood. He had a white scarf around his neck, snuggling him comfortably.
“Kakyoin. Your stomach.” Jotaro noticed, “and you have scars on your eyes.”
Kakyoin nodded. He caressed the other’s cheeks with his two hands, ending Jotaro cried as he saw his damaged lover.
“I love you, Jotaro. I might not be around you, but I’ll always be your Polaris.”
Kakyoin tiptoed and kissed Jotaro lightly. His feet lifted off the ground and flew to where the Northern Star was. Jotaro tried to chase the redhead, but he stood instead, watching him ascend to nowhere.
Jotaro woke up with tears on his eyes. He looked at the clock on the wall and he quickly stood up to get ready for school.
Since his return to Japan from Florida, thirty-year-old Jotaro was done with his job in Morioh. As promised to his daughter, Jolyne, they would go to Japan to show her his home country. He showed her various places and things that America didn’t have. He purchased her a plushie of her favorite game character and they spent nights with his mother Holly.
What made Jolyne’s experience complete was when they rode the Shinkansen train. It was evening when they rode the train to his old home on the outskirts of Tokyo. Jolyne elbowed her father as she saw something.
“Daddy, look!”
Jotaro viewed at what Jolyne pointed at — it was a star that shined the most. “The star shined brighter than at home, Daddy.”
Topic about stars gave him goosebumps. He didn’t know why he felt tensed as stars were pretty to look at especially when there were in a rural place.
“My teacher told me that the only star that stayed in place is Polaris and it’s brighter than the other stars in the sky,” Jolyne explained.
Jotaro grinned. “You are such an observant, Jolyne.”
“Are we near home?”
“Yes, we are.”
Jotaro and Jolyne went to Holly’s home. While Jolyne ran to hug her grandmother, Jotaro told his mother that he would be in his bedroom. Seeing his old bedroom again made him feel in youth again, but what made him feel something was when he sat down on the porch, thinking about his contemplations when he was a rebellious teenager but suppressing the ones that had someone in it. He looked at the North Star again. Tonight, was the perfect night to look at the stars again, but with the noise from his grandmother and his daughter, his deep thinking was disturbed.
“Daddy, I’m tired,” Jolyne nudged his shoulder, “I want to go to sleep. Grandma is about to sleep.”
Finally. Jotaro stood up and took her to his old bedroom. Jolyne learned to change her clothes, making Jotaro proud as a father. She lay down on the futon placed beside his.
“Are you not going to sleep too, daddy?”
“No.”
“Can you tell me a bedtime story?”
Jotaro chuckled. “Sure.”
Jolyne gave him a big smile and listened to him.
“Once upon a time, there was a boy named Koko who wandered alone in the dark forest. He always visited the forest but not at that time of the day.” Jotaro paused to look at his daughter to see if she was sleeping. She wasn’t. “He cried and cried in the middle of the forest. Koko didn’t know what to do until he saw a beautiful person with a fox mask named Nori. Nori told Koko to look at the brightest star and followed it. During Koko’s journey to get out of the forest, Nori told Koko about the beauty of the stars made him fell in love with them. Koko agreed with it and they became friends, but when Koko finally go out of the forest, he was about to show Nori the world around them, but he disappeared.”
Why I have to tell the story that way? But luckily, Jolyne fell asleep before he told her the ending. He teared up as he remembered the teenager that he fell in love with.
“I wish you can see Noriaki, Jolyne. He will be joyful to meet you.”
Jotaro stood up and went out of his bedroom. He sat down at the same position as last time to stargaze. Whenever he stared at the twinkling stars, he remembered the dream — which was an altered illusion of what they did that night. While he tried to find a group of stars to make constellations, a light green butterfly blocked his view.
“Jotaro.”
Jotaro was surprised to hear the voice that made the little one fly away. He looked down to see where it came from. He saw his man in white kimono. There was no hole in his abdomen, unlike last time.
“Noriaki…” Jotaro quickly stood up and ran to hug him. He felt so real, but the question was — was he living in reality?
“Jotaro, you need to go back to bed,” Kakyoin told him.
“No. I wanted to be with you until morning,” Jotaro refused.
“I am only here for a short time. I am supposed to watch over you and Jolyne, but it seems my business is disturbed.”
“You… watched over us? Where?” Jotaro asked.
“I thought you already know where. I told you that!”
Jotaro looked up to the brightest star. His eyes widened in realization.
Kakyoin laughed and teased. “You, forgetful old man!”
“So, it’s true. You are the Polaris.”
“Indeed.” Kakyoin checked for the location of the moon, which was already past midnight. He felt sad that this would be the last time to be with Jotaro/
“Anything you want to say? I think this might be our only chance to meet.”
Jotaro began to tear up again. Kakyoin was puzzled.
“Jotaro, I’m sorry—”
“I love you, Noriaki,” Jotaro admitted what he wanted to confess throughout their journey, “I’m sorry I couldn’t tell this to you when I met you again in my dreams. Sorry I couldn’t protect you.”
Kakyoin twitched a deep smile on his face and chuckled. “Finally, you said it. You must not say sorry for not protecting me. You protected not only me but the rest of the crusaders.” He tiptoed to reach Jotaro’s cheek to peck a kiss.
A kiss on the cheek wasn’t enough for them, so they lean in for another kiss. Jotaro cupped his cheeks to hold him as he was short although Kakyoin held his broad shoulders. When they were released from the kiss, Kakyoin slowly disappeared along with the butterflies around him. For the first time, Jotaro saw him retreating to the afterlife, feeling contented with an assurance that he and Jolyne were watched over by the beautiful man among the stars.