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Bam knew he couldn't take the idea of Khun being absent from his life again. He rejected every possibility of Khun having to leave his sight. Maybe he was a bit clingy but he didn't care. Khun was so important to him and he was willing to make him his life purpose despite everything (though he already did).
Bam never really believed in the existence of God. The closest person who had been that to him was Rachel, but in the end he learnt that he was wrong. Bam wondered if any of this was really worth it. Were the stars really worth giving up what he had. He didn't know.
When Bam first climbed the tower he realized he knew nothing. He had nothing. He wanted something. He just didn't know what exactly.
But meeting Khun changed everything for him.
Bam started learning. He started identifying his emotions. Life started giving him more than he ever desired.
He was sure that Khun was the first gift he had ever received and the only gift he’d never wanna lose.
Maybe he didn’t believe in God, but he constantly prayed to never lose Khun regardless.
Yet he was sure if Heavens actually existed they were testing him, since Bam had lost count on how many times he almost lost Khun and it was driving him crazy.
Becoming Viole to protect Khun almost made him lose him. Being with him almost made him lose him too. Being away had almost cost Khun’s life and Bam really didn’t know what to do anymore. He decided then, fuck the Heavens if they exist, he’ll defy them. If it was for Khun’s safety he was ready to fight whatever divine power he has to fight, even if it's God himself.
He just wanted to protect the one and only gift he had, was that too much to ask?
“Mmh, Bam you okay?”
The familiar voice brought Bam to reality. The sight of Khun turning around to face him, lazy eyes slightly opening to stare at him. His lashes fluttered as he blinked. His palm under his cheek, his sapphire eyes illuminated the galaxy. He looked absolutely stunning, Bam thought.
“I could feel you staring at me for a while now, are you having trouble sleeping again?”
Bam could see the concern rising in his eyes, he really felt like he didn't deserve Khun, he was so gorgeous and only ever cared for him. He didn't wanna take his eyes off him. He was scared he’d vanish if he closed his eyes. Bam smiled softly at him and nodded apologetically.
Khun hummed at him and spread his arms inviting Bam into his embrace with a warm smile
“Mm’alright, we can't help it can we? come here”
Bam got used to this by now, he didn't hesitate anymore. The first time he asked Khun if he could sleep closer to him he was almost sure he saw a hint of surprise in Khun’s ocean eyes. He knew his request was selfish, but he also knew that Khun would never reject him. Khun smiled at him a second later then, and welcomed him with open arms, quite literally.
Bam realized he grew greedier after, and he was aware that Khun knew it was all excuses too.
He slowly moved into his embrace. Wrapping his arms around him tightly. He could feel Khun’s chin resting on the top of his head. Bam buried his face in Khun’s chest. Listening to the steady rhythm of his chest moving. He felt safe when holding onto his own star.
“Khun”
“Mmh”
“Thank you”
It didn't take Bam long to drift away after.
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Bam lazily fluttered his eyes open when the golden rays touched his skin, filling him with warmth. He slowly looked up to find the light colouring Khun’s blue strands gently. His honey skin shone golden with the morning light reflecting on his cheek. Bam knew the sight in front of him was beyond godly to be even described. If it wasn't for the fact he woke up now, he’d have believed that the dryness he felt in his throat was because of it. Khun really defined beauty itself.
He was ready to stare at the sight all day if it wasn't for a heavy weight on his back.
Bam groaned at how sore his back felt. Rak damn it.
He used all his morning energy to shove Rak's heavy body off him. He tended to forget that they all shared the same room sometimes. He was thankful Rak didn’t sleep with his original form, he was sure he’d have lost some of his bones if that ever happened.
Khun reacted at the noise in his sleep. Bam watched him shifting to the other side mumbling something. He was so fucking endearing sleeping, the other guys wouldn't believe it. Bam smiled fondly.
The Brunet yawned lazily glancing up staring into nothing. He fell asleep yet again in Khun’s embrace and it felt good. Khun is still there, Khun will always be there. He wanted to believe.
He was sure Khun had noticed his weird behaviors ever since he woke up from his coma, yet he never questioned him. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to tell him why himself anyway.
He wasn’t sure what all these emotions meant, and he was having a hard time dealing with them.
Khun shifting again caught Bam’s attention...he liked watching the other boy in his sleep before having to wake him up. It was still early he could leave Khun to sleep for a couple of hours more. He tilted his head, resting it on his knees, smiling softly at the sleeping beauty of his. He was frowning and pouting. Bam wondered what kind of vision made him react like that.
“Khun” he said, not expecting any reaction really. Khun was in deep sleep.
Bam didn’t know what he was trying to do either. He liked saying his name, liked the taste it left in his mouth.
“Ag..ue..ro” he said in a low soft voice, tasting every small sound of it while watching the other still asleep.
Khun frowned at this, eyes still closed. Bam felt his heart almost drop for a second, but then the frown faded gently replacing a blank face on the sleeping one.
His dream sure is intense, Bam thought to himself.
Bam was too focused when the sudden noise made his head jerk up, the door of the room opened “Bam! You awake?” It was Endorsi. Bam winced at how loud she was hoping she didn't wake Khun up. He looked back at him abruptly seeing he didn’t even flinch. He sighed in relief.
He shifted his attention back to the girl, “Ya, lemme just go brush my teeth and we can start training”
She grinned at him pleased “you’ve become an early bird recently”
Well, it was thanks to Khun he thought, but he didn’t have to tell her that.
He stood up as he hummed, exiting the room to leave the blue haired boy sleep a bit more,
“See you later, Bam” he mumbled. It was loud enough for Bam to hear. He swiftly looked back. Khun’s eyes were still shut, but a soft smile was drawn on his face. His glossy lips looked pretty as ever. Bam felt a sudden flush rushing to his face.
“Yeah, see you later. Khun” he retorted, quickly leaving the room to follow Endorsi.
Khun was actually awake...oh.
________________________
Bam was sure he had burnt out all the energy he had left today and if anything his legs are only working because they have to. He loved training with Endorsi but she really didn’t spare him a minute to rest at all. She enjoyed torturing him with Yuri for their own pleasure. Not that he could stop them.
He sighed hearing how loud his stomach Is growling, It was already dinner time.
Time really passed swiftly here. It felt like he was constantly racing, trying to defy the speed of it.
He walked down the hall only to see the reflection of his. He looked like an utter mess and he needed to shower first. He could feel the sweat dripping down his hair all over his neck slowly going down his collarbone.
Honestly, he only wanted to throw himself onto his bed and sleep for hours, but he knew he’d get a handful from Khun for doing so… right, Khun... he is probably still training.
He could feel the overwhelming emotions brushing his heart thinking of Khun. He really wanted to see him right now. Plus, that will certainly be a nice sight to see. It didn't take Bam a second to gather the strength left in his legs to make his way to the blue haired boy.
He was excited. He was aware of that. The thought of seeing Khun made the energy rush inside him. He could feel the unnamed emotions taking over him. His chest felt heavy. He didn't know what it was that he sought for exactly. But he knew Khun was part of it.
It didn't take him long to reach Khun’s training area. He stopped at the entrance, putting his palms on his knees as he tried to catch his breath. He slowly leaned on the wall looking up, eyes searching for the blue.
He caught the other boy concentrating on his training, too focused to notice him. Khun’s sapphire hair was damp all over the place, his braids were loose. The white shirt sleeves were a bit torn. His collarbone for some reason was more noticeable than usual. Bam could see the drops of sweat all over the boy’s chest. His eyes were so bright, he was grinning as if he had figured something out. Seeing that, he was in awe... Khun looked delightful despite everything. His mouth felt entirely dry at the sight in front of him.
Bam gulped as he tried to collect his thoughts. He felt the heat of his body rising almost as if he had a fever. Fuck. He needed to keep his composure; he was sure everything was written all over his face.
Khun eventually turned his back, noticing Bam. He grinned widely at the boy as if he could read his thoughts. Bam smiled at him weakly, waving at him unsure of what to do.
The blue haired boy willed away his new flames, he was shining glorious to Bam’s eyes. He just couldn't take his eyes off him as he approached him with a smile.
“Bam! You are here” he exclaimed happily, greeting him though he looked tired. He reached for the golden eyed boy burying his face into his shoulder. Bam stiffened, feeling the boy’s wet face touching his bare chest.
“Mmh” Bam managed to hum as a response. He tried to sound as natural as he could, despite the warmth he felt across his chest. He could feel his heart rapidly racing as if it was at war. Feeling the crimson shade colouring the tips of his ears and cheeks. If not his entire face.
“ I came to see you” he managed to gather the words knowing he sounded fazed a bit by Khun’s action. But the other boy looked up, indifferent, he smiled at him softly.
“That makes me happy, Bam.Thank you”
“Yea…” their faces were only inches apart, he could feel the air the other breathed gently hitting his face. Their noses almost brushed. He was sure he’d stop breathing any moment
The ocean eyes met the golden unfazed. His gaze grew intense. Bam wasn't able to read the sapphire eyes. It felt like he was drowning in an ocean of untold secrets. Bam wanted to unveil each one of them. He wanted to piece the puzzle of these galaxy eyes, to see the whole beautiful picture. To keep it for himself...he realized.
He desired to make the blue his. Only his and no one else’s.
His mouth opened slightly, unsure of what he wanted to say. Khun however, bumped both their foreheads and smirked at Bam, as if he saw through him. He backed off then,
“You stink” the smirk grew broad, Khun’s eyes smiled, his playful expression made Bam want to clutch onto his chest. Bam felt ridiculous. Oh my god so that was it. He laughed. This is what he really wanted. He wanted him to be his...his own star.
Khun looked at Bam. His smile was still there, but he looked confused for why Bam’s laughter grew louder each minute. Bam could see it but he didn’t know what to say. He didn't know how to tell him. Bam just realized the obvious and he felt funny. He loved everything about the blue eyed boy. He fucking loved him so much. He didn't know what to do.
Khun smugly titled his head at him “ i think we should call it a day for you, Bam i mean wow i only called you stinky you should be offended-”
His voice faded in his ears, Bam looked at him feeling relief spreading in his body, he felt happy, he wasn't sure why. He should be scared, scared that he’ll be pushed away for having such feelings. But he was happy. Perhaps it was because it was Khun and no one else. He felt lucky.
He wasn't listening anymore. He stared at his lips moving, the smile spreading with each word. Khun’s oblivious eyes. The eyes filled with warmth. He is really endearing, Bam thought. He wanted to hold him.
So he did.
His arms spread on their own.gently tugging the boy in front of him closer, chests slowly crushing against each other. Khun seemed startled, his hands in the air unmoving. Bam wasn't planning to explain himself. He just wanted to keep him in his embrace. He felt the joy filling his heart as if it was an endless water stream.
Khun didn't say anything, it didn't take long for his palms to land softly on him. He quietly soothed Bam’s back and hummed pleasantly.
He waited a few minutes for Bam to settle in his arms too “Is something going on, Bam?”
“Mmh no ‘m alright jus happy”
He could feel the concern in Khun’s expression disappear. He didn't have to see it, he knew the other smiled softly hearing that. And he was ready to melt in his embrace. He chuckled a little. “alright” is all he said. Allowing the brunet to linger as long as he wanted.
He nuzzled into the other’s chest, pleased. Finally realizing what all these emotions meant. He was grateful that Khun never questioned his actions. He felt lucky that he allowed him to do all what he wanted. He was glad he could always go back to a safe hug like this everyday.
Bam could stay like this forever. He would never complain one a bit, if it wasn’t for his stomach growling for food. God he hates this. It was so loud, cutting through the silence. This is so awkward. He felt his face heating up. Khun started trembling in his embrace...probably trying to control himself
Embarrassing. The other burst into laughter.
Bam pouted pulling away the blue eyed boy from his shoulder. still shaking from laughter, his eyes got teary. The laughter got louder, echoing in the empty hall. Well, if this is what he gets he is not complaining
“Let's go eat.” Bam said, pretending nothing happened. Though he was sure everything was written on his face.
Khun wiped a tear from the side of his face, arm still on his stomach, trying to control himself. He was having way too much fun.
He finally managed to breathe steadily. Looking calm again but his grin still drawn on his pretty face.
“Shower first, Bam. we are literally dripping sweat all over”
Oh right.
The brunet coughed “yea right, shower first”.
__________________
The day passed like the wind as Bam slowly tried to understand each emotion that brushed his heart.
He couldn’t help but watch the sapphire haired boy all along. Watching the eyes of his grow bigger, sparkling, smiling and softly changing as he talked to the others.
He couldn’t help but notice his pouty lips taking many shapes as he bickered with Hatz, the smug smile to the soft one.
He couldn’t help but stare at each blue strand of his hair, slightly moving with the breeze. The braids of his getting messy as time passes, the few lonely strands unmoving in the air hanging.
Bam couldn’t stop himself from following each small movement the other made with so much endearment.
He knew he looked like he lost his mind. He was sure if Rachel saw him like this she would pity him. He didn't care. Rachel would never know what it is like to have your own twinkling star. She wouldn’t experience the sheer joy swiping her heart the way he did. He didn't care if he seemed pathetic.
Time passed and the light danced across the sky. The moon already made it up in the dim sky along with the tiny stars gathering around it, stretching in endless lines. Khun walked into the room along with Bam, immediately throwing himself on the bouncing bed. He sighed, clearly exhausted. The blue eyes glittered as they reflected the moonlight coming from across the window. He then lay down. The lines of his body shone transparent under the white. He looked elegant. Simply doing...nothing
Oh wow, maybe Bam has lost it.
Bam tried not to stare for long. Clearing his throat carefully, he sat on the bed beside the other. He was content, really. He couldn't ask for more. He moved closer, glancing at the boy beneath him, eyes already drowsy. He smiled.
Khun purred, peeking at him with his half lidded eyes, waiting for the golden eyed boy to speak.
Bam wasn’t sure how people usually dealt with such emotions. He would’ve asked his friends but he knew he’d be a subject of suspicion and gossip by then. He didn't want anyone else to know. Not anyone that is not Khun. he only wanted to share these emotions with the blue. He wanted to tell him he had fallen for him. He fancied him. He is head over heels for him, that-
“I love you” he whispered tenderly, loud enough for Khun to hear.
The blue eyes suddenly widened. Twinkling like a pair of stars in a pitch black sky. His mouth opened slightly, enough for Bam to notice. Surprise drawn on face. A shade of scarlet slowly coloured the honey skin of his. The sapphire eyes met the gleaming gold of Bam’s. He didn’t say anything.
Bam softened, delighted by the sight in front of him, he couldn’t help but say it again
“I love you, Aguero”
“Oh.” Khun seemed really startled. His calm state washed away, replaced with unreadable emotions instead. Bam wasn’t sure if he did the right thing, but he was glad he said it. Khun seemed to get it too. He seemed to realize it's not just a trivial “i love you” he knew what Bam meant.
“Bam” Khun said, followed with silence, he seemed unsure of what to say. Bam didn't expect anything, he quietly waited for the other to say the words resting on his tongue. He didn't really want more, he was satisfied. He was content with the fact that he could love someone unconditionally. And that person being Khun was more than enough for him.
The blue eyed boy closed his mouth as he got up, foreheads brushing. Eyes locked with the golden again. He seemed serious, searching for answers in Bam’s expressions.
Bam didn't try to hide anything. He let Khun read him like an open book. He might have seemed fearless, but as the minutes passed, he could feel the anxiety creeping up on him slowly. He didn't want more really, but he was suddenly anticipating something. He wanted to know what the other thought. What all this meant.
“Bam” Khun’s voice was soft. He seemed hesitant.
Bam waited, only realizing how close their faces were, barely a few inches away.
“What you just said-...the thing you said now” Khun was struggling. Khun never struggled to say something. Ever. Bam wasn't sure if he should start panicking or run away. He just realized how big these words were...he should have asked Endorsi about this, fuck.
“Say it again.” he said. He looked at him, eyes hopeful. Bam could see it. His eyes were as clear as ice
“ I love you...uh i fancy you? i think i-... yeah i love you so much” Bam made sure to look at him directly. Making sure his words are crystal clear for the other to understand.
His eyes glowed hearing him. Face sparkled with glee. He was so beautiful.
“Bam, what the fuck” Khun’s smile was as wide as ever.
Bam was sure it was impossible for the other to get closer. But he was wrong. Their faces were even closer. Their noses brushing. The air they breathed warming each other’s skin
“ i mean, Bam. me too… Bam i- i love you too”
Bam didn't expect this. He wasn’t sure what to do next. He didn't think the other would...return his feelings. Hell, he was so blessed?
He was sure his eyes turned glossy and the other could notice. The ocean eyes smiled at him as he traced Bam’s cheeks, he seemed so pleasant. Bam has never seen him this pleased since...he didn't know anymore. All he wanted was to touch the other.
And so he did.
He returned the other’s touch. His hand retracing the gleaming skin gently, Khun let him without a word. His eyes filled with sparkling stars, intensely meeting the other’s, anticipating.
Bam observed the other’s face as much as he could. He was flawless. He really was. His eyes landed on the boy’s lips. They were shiny and looked soft. They were so pretty.
Feeling a rushing heat hitting his whole body, he shifted his attention to the blue haired cheeks. He smiled shyly as he closed the distance between them. Giving the other a small peck.
Khun’s eyes couldn't get bigger. He was in disbelief
Bam giggled embarrassed. Maybe that's not it?
but Khun softly sneered. “ you are cute Bam, what was that?”
Bam evaded the blue gaze, the red shade filling his cheeks. He cleared his throat, pouted
“Nothing i jus wanted to do that”
Khun looked at him , a smirk drawn in his face, he hummed.
“Since when did you feel like that” he asked suddenly, curiosity drawn on his face
“ donno” Bam retorted. He wasn't sure honestly, he only learnt what his feelings meant today...but since when?... he wasn't sure. But he was sure that he had always wanted Khun to be with him as far as he remembered.
“ I don't know but I think it’s been going on for years” he continued thoughtfully.
Khun stared at him, as if he was trying to take every word and process it. He then smirked at Bam, suddenly pulling him. Noses crushed as their lips met.
Bam was shocked, unable to move. The fluttering emotions blossomed like flowers inside him. The surging tide of warmth brushing his heart. The tender lips tasted sweet, they were soft, he closed his eyes. Trying to taste him more and more. His lips clumsy following the other’s. Khun’s fingers slowly curled around Bam’s neck. Lost in the moment. The taste was almost addicting. The blue eyed boy took over all his senses. Stealing him completely.
Half opened eyes sneaking a guilty peek as they gasped for air. Every breath he took tasted like Khun. lips pressed for more, hungry. Heads titling as if they chased each other. Khun licked his lips, biting down, the kisses were passionate, full of love, as if the other yearned for it for long. The desires washed over Bam, lips parting, allowing tongues to connect. It was so good, God, the kiss silenced all his thoughts, arms tangled around the blue, he could do this forever.
Swift kisses slowed down, tired eyes exchanged smiles. The moonlight made the blue incredibly bright. He was so captivating, the ocean eyes were so full.
It was dreamy. He could never have enough.
“you taste like gold, Aguero” he muttered, words escaping his mouth without realizing.
The blue eyes were impossibly sparkly, they smiled. A soft chuckle escaping his scarlet lips.
“You taste like cherries, Bam” the blue said. Foreheads against each other. Looking down at the golden’s mouth, lips greeted each other again chastely, as the other pulled him down in his embrace, the stars shone as if they were celebrating them.
“I could do that all night but i'm tired” Khun mumbled, beneath him. Eyes already closed.
“But I want more” Bam said, teasingly...(okay maybe not) but he knew the other wouldn’t reject that even if he starts complaining
“Bam. no, if we do that i wont get a wink of sleep”
“Just once?” The brunet said, putting a desperate tone on his words, testing the water once more.
Khun sighed, defeated, yet fondly looked up at him complaining “Why are you stubborn...fine, just once”
Both of them knew that wouldn't happen.
All Bam’s night tasted like gold.