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[TAPE RECORDER CLICKS ON.]
[FOOTSTEPS.]
[DISTANTLY, THE APOCALYPTIC WINDS CONTINUE TO HOWL.]
MARTIN
….So.
ARCHIVIST
So?
MARTIN
(drawn out) Sooo...
ARCHIVIST
What is it, Martin?
MARTIN
(smug) Boyfriend, huh?
ARCHIVIST
Look, I—
MARTIN
(overlapping) You said boyfriend! I heard you clear as day!
ARCHIVIST
I… I did.
(a pause)
ARCHIVIST [CONT’D]
I was a bit distracted by the uh, flora, that the Flesh's domain so carefully cultivated for me and the question caught me off guard. It-it just slipped out.
MARTIN
It slipped out?
ARCHIVIST
Jared Hopworth... I didn’t like the way he was looking at you. Like he was, I don’t know, sizing you up? Preparing some scathing remark about… I don’t know . I didn’t appreciate his tone.
ARCHIVIST [CONT’D]
(sigh) I shouldn’t have assumed. I apologize.
[MARTIN LAUGHS, AND THE ARCHIVIST STARTLES.]
ARCHIVIST [CONT’D]
Care to enlighten me as to what's so funny?
MARTIN
(stifling laughter) It's just—Why are you apologizing?
ARCHIVIST
Well, um. We didn’t exactly talk about… labels. We didn’t talk about the, uh, specifics? About us, what we are. I believe it was unfair of me to assign you a title on my authority alone, considering—
MARTIN
(overlapping) Seriously, Jon?
ARCHIVIST
Look, I merely thought it courteous to get your input before—
MARTIN
(overlapping) It’s okay, Jon. I wasn’t laughing at you, I just… hm.
(a pause)
MARTIN [CONT’D]
So you want my input, is that it?
ARCHIVIST
I think I’ve made that clear.
MARTIN
Alright.
[SOME SHUFFLING, AND THE ARCHIVIST MAKES A SMALL, STARTLED SOUND.]
ARCHIVIST
What are you—
[FABRIC RUSTLING, FOLLOWED BY A LONG PAUSE.]
[A SIGH. MORE RUSTLING, THEN SHUFFLING OF FEET AS THEY PULL APART.]
MARTIN
(satisfied 'hm') There. That’s my input.
ARCHIVIST
(dazed) I… I see.
ARCHIVIST [CONT’D]
So, ah. B-boyfriends, then?
MARTIN
Yes!
ARCHIVIST
Alright, alright. Just making sure.
[THE ARCHIVIST ADJUSTS HIS BAG. THE SOUND OF FOOTSTEPS RESUMES AS THE PAIR CONTINUE ON THEIR WAY.]
MARTIN
Jon?
ARCHIVIST
Yes, Martin?
MARTIN
Wasn’t it, I dunno, obvious ?
ARCHIVIST
Wasn’t what obvious?
MARTIN
Erm, us ? What we are?
MARTIN [CONT’D]
It's just, this wasn’t exactly the first time we’ve… and I mean it’s been what, a few weeks now?
ARCHIVIST
Time as we once knew it doesn’t much apply to this world, Martin. You know that.
MARTIN
You know what I mean!
ARCHIVIST
(sigh) Yes. Yes, I do.
(a pause)
MARTIN
(softly) Do you think I’d do that with just anyone?
ARCHIVIST
That’s hardly my business, Martin.
MARTIN
Well, I appreciate the courtesy. But for the record, I wouldn’t. I don’t. Just with you. I only want to with you.
(a pause)
MARTIN [CONT’D]
Jon, are you… is this something you worry about?
ARCHIVIST
(ruefully) I’ve… misinterpreted before. Mistaken friendships for something else. Or the other way round. Mind, it was years ago, when I was… less experienced in relationships. But I’ve never been great about picking up on signals.
MARTIN
I think a kiss is a pretty blaring signal, don’t you? Amongst other things.
ARCHIVIST [CONT’D]
(embarrassed) It… it never hurts to double check.
MARTIN
(he huffs a small laugh) Well I’m happy to provide you with the, uh, clarity you seek. Whenever you need.
ARCHIVIST
Thank you.
[THEIR FOOTSTEPS STOP. THERE'S SHUFFLING, AND THE RUSTLING OF FABRIC.]
MARTIN
(a whisper) No need.
[A DRAWN-OUT SILENCE.]
[THEY BOTH SIGH. THERE'S MORE SHUFFLING AS THEY MOVE APART.]
ARCHIVIST
Martin...
MARTIN
Like I said, anytime.
ARCHIVIST
(flustered) Q-Quite.
[THEIR FOOTSTEPS RESUME.]
ARCHIVIST [CONT’D]
If it’s going to be like that every time, I would be happy to receive your, uh… reassurance.
MARTIN
Good, because there’s plenty more left where those came from.
ARCHIVIST
Mm.
MARTIN
I do get it. I mean, Lord knows I still pinch myself sometimes. (chuckling) Make sure I’m not dreaming, and all.
[THE SOUND OF FOOTSTEPS ABRUPTLY HALTS AGAIN, AND MARTIN MAKES A SMALL NOISE OF SURPRISE.]
ARCHIVIST
Martin.
ARCHIVIST [CONT’D]
You are categorically not dreaming.
MARTIN
I’m not, am I?
MARTIN [CONT’D]
(chuffed) I’m not!
ARCHIVIST
(audibly smiling) You’re not.
ARCHIVIST [CONT’D]
Besides, if this were all in your head it’d be more apt to call it a nightmare than a dream.
MARTIN
Jon.
ARCHIVIST
Just a joke.
MARTIN
Well, it’s a bit hard to tell with you sometimes.
ARCHIVIST
(fondly) I’ll try to make it easier.
[THE ARCHIVIST READJUSTS HIS BAG AGAIN.]
ARCHIVIST [CONT’D]
Well. Shall we?
MARTIN
Lead the way.
ARCHIVIST
Wait.
[SHUFFLING.]
ARCHIVIST [CONT’D]
Here.
[MORE SHUFFLING, AND A SOFT ‘OH’ FROM MARTIN.]
ARCHIVIST [CONT’D]
I’d rather not lose sight of you again.
MARTIN
R-right. Thanks.
[FOOTSTEPS RESUME.]
[TAPE RECORDER CLICKS OFF.]
