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Sirius knew that it was silly. He knew that. But it didn't stop him from worrying about it. Him and James had been dating for exactly fifteen days, and not once had they kissed. Sirius wanted a kiss. For Merlin's sake, he had earned a kiss after dealing with James pining loudly after Lily for the past five years-- possibly six, but Sirius didn't normally include first year in that since James had been preoccupied with pranks and his new best mate rather than chasing birds.
They had been dating for fifteen days, and Sirius had not gotten a single kiss. He could have initiated one of his own. He should have done before it got late enough in their relationship for him to realise there was something going on. And alright, he'd noticed this after a week, and with every passing day, it felt worse. How long was this going to go on? Was Sirius going to suffer-- unkissed-- for months? He wasn't sure he'd be able to survive that; he really really wasn't.
He'd thought about bringing it up to James the moment he noticed, but before he got the chance, unpleasant thoughts started creeping in. Was there a reason James hadn't kissed him yet? Maybe he wasn't sure about Sirius. Maybe he was fine with snogging Sirius, but not if it meant solidifying their relationship. Damn it. Damn everything. He kept turning it over in his head, and he never felt better about it.
The bare bones of it was that Sirius wanted to kiss him, they were dating which was the perfect background for kissing someone, and for whatever reason, James hadn't kissed him yet. It was enough to drive a bloke completely mad.
Sirius had the bollocks to cuddle up to James and heavily hint that he would like to be kissed, but he didn't have the bollocks to actually do it himself or talk to James about it. Somehow, and in some way, James was missing the signs. Sirius thought that sitting on his lap would be a pretty big sign that couldn't be misinterpreted. When that didn't work, he tried unabashed cuddling. That didn't work either, but he liked the way both of them felt, so he kept on. And now they were at day fifteen and he hadn't gotten so much as a peck on the cheek.
"I don't know what to do Wormy," Sirius said.
"Well the first thing you should do is talk to Prongs about it, not me."
"That's not an option."
Peter glared at him. "Let me see if I'm remembering this correctly, alright?"
"Alright."
"James hasn't kissed you."
Sirius nodded.
"You want him to kiss, right?"
Sirius nodded again.
"And you refuse to kiss him yourself or talk to him about it."
"Yeah."
"Whelp, those were your two options for solving this, so either do them or bugger off and bother Moony about this so he can tell you the same thing."
"Fuck no, I'm not talking to Moony about this."
"Why, you're afraid I'll be right?"
"More like Moony doesn't listen half the time, and the other half, he goes and does something to try and solve it himself. I don't need that kind of meddling shite right now."
"Kinda feels like you do," Peter muttered, and Sirius threw up a v.
Then Sirius straightened with a jerk. "You're not going to say anything to him."
"I won't."
Sirius narrowed his eyes. "Solemnly swear, Wormtail. We have a sacred oath to keep secrets for each other."
"Yeah, from other people, not within the group."
"Me and Prongs are dating, the rules are different."
Peter rolled his eyes, but dutifully said, "I solemnly swear not to share the contents of this conversation with Prongs until such time that they are already known to him."
"You don't get to tell Moony about it either. He's not doing the dirty work for you."
Peter waved his hand to include him in the pact. "Yeah, yeah, sure thing mate. This stays between you and me even though the smart thing would be for you to bloody talk to your dumb arse boyfriend."
Sirius flicked a quill at him. He was too far away for it to land, but he knew that Peter got the sentiment. "Don't call my boyfriend dumb."
"If he wasn't dumb, I wouldn't have had to listen to you whinge for the last hour."
"Pete, what did I just say?"
"I'll agree to the pact, but not calling James dumb is where I draw the line. He's been a dumb arse since first year, and that hasn't changed."
Sirius knew when he had lost but wasn't willing to admit it, so he said, "Bugger off. Just remember that you agreed not to say anything."
"Burned into my brain, Pads. Couldn't forget it if I tried."
"Good."
James was handing him a bouquet with a bright grin on his face. "Bat orchids. Took bloody forever to find, but I wanted this to be perfect."
Sirius didn't know much about flowers, but these were absolutely gorgeous. There were little strings budding from each flower that looked like cat whiskers, and Sirius was about to ask if they tickled when James kissed him. James. Kissed. Him. It took Sirius a moment to get his brain to work, but he kissed him back as soon as he had the wits to do so. He had to move the flowers to the side so they wouldn't get crushed between their bodies as they leaned a little closer.
James was somehow grinning wider than before when they separated, and Sirius knew he was blushing from the heat in his face.
Sirius cleared his throat and looked down at the flowers, then leaned in and smelled them. "Thanks, they're beautiful."
"Good. They- erm, took ages to find. I wanted to have them for when I asked you out, but I'd been looking for like two months and found nothing so I thought to hell with it. And then I found a florist that could send me some, but it still took like, two weeks or summat, so I figured first kiss would work."
Sirius blinked. "You were waiting for these to come in to kiss me?"
"Yeah."
A laugh startled out of Sirius.
"What?"
"Nothing," he said, shaking his head.
"No, really, what is it?"
"Well I erm- I'd been wondering why we hadn't kissed. Got all nervous about it. Went and bothered Wormtail over it, that sort of shite, y'know?"
"You were nervous? What for?"
Sirius shrugged, blushing harder even as he willed for it to go away. To try and make it seem more casual, he moved the flowers to one hand and put the other around James's shoulders and started walking them back to the castle. "Eh, worried that you were having second thoughts. Like I said, it was a load of tripe."
"Why didn't you ask me about it?"
"Merlin, you sound just like Peter."
"How confusing for you," James teased. "Really though, we've been able to talk about anything. You could've asked, and I would've told you, then poof! No more worrying."
"Yeah, just..."
"Just what?"
"Nothing."
"Aw c'mon Sirius, we tell each other everything! What's a few more embarrassing moments between us?"
Sirius thought about avoiding the question again, but he knew that James wasn't going to let up. "It's not a big deal, alright?"
James gave a dutiful nod.
"I er- well I sorta thought that you didn't want to because it was me . You know that I've never kissed anyone before, so I was... y'know. A little worried that you'd be disappointed when we did end up kissing."
James cooed obnoxiously, then pressed a smacking kiss to his cheek. "Sirius Black, the most gorgeous bloke in the entire world, was worried that I would be disappointed with him. Love, you could never disappoint me."