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The days were filled with stress for NCT 127.
Everyone was caught up with practice for their comeback, trying to get their own work done while also somehow not neglecting themselves.
Taeyong tried his best to keep an eye out for everyone - making sure they ate well, drank enough water and got much needed rest whilst perfecting the choreography.
He was at the dorm on a relatively relaxed day. They had mostly finished up the preparations, the comeback was right around the corner.
He had wanted to get some time off for himself, just a few hours, to mentally prepare himself for the coming days of promotions. It had been very hectic after all and this was only the start.
Taeyong sat at his desk, listening to some of his unfinished songs and taking notes. One might argue he was still technically working, but it actually helped him calm down, knowing he wasn't wasting time, but also not exhausting himself too much.
His monitor was the only source of light lighting up his dark room as he clicked around, dragging one audio file after the other. He was humming to himself, headphones on, and enjoying the solitude.
After a few more minutes, he leaned back in his chair, stretching his arms above his head.
Maybe I should go and check on the others for a bit, he thought. It was still the middle of the day after all and he hadn't really left his room much anyway.
He'd allow himself a quick chat with the others, especially wanting to see Doyoung for a bit after only having talked to him for some time in the morning.
The younger had been working especially hard this time around. He had been taking extra singing and dancing lesson left and right, practically only coming to the dorm to sleep.
Taeyong had tried to keep his concern mostly to himself - he knew Doyoung was good at managing his time and rationally deciding what was best for him. He definitely wasn't as careless as Taeyong was, making for a good balance in their relationship.
But, of course, he still worried. Everyone needed a break sometimes, the one who insisted he didn't being the one to need it the most usually.
Taeyong finally pushed himself off the chair, stretching one last time before heading out of his room.
The hallway was an intense contrast to his own room. It was flooded with bright daylight, a comforting warmth.
He walked down towards their living room, passing the kitchen on his way and looking for anyone lurking around.
When he stuck his head into the kitchen, he was greeted by the sight of both their youngest and oldest.
"Finally decided to come join us for some fun, hyung?" Haechan asked with his usual cheeky smile.
"I really don't know if that's what this is, but you're still welcome to join us." Taeil chimed in from where he was currently trying to get sticky dough off his fingers.
There was flour everywhere, dirtied bowls piled up over the counter, a few cookie cutters amidst the mess.
It looked like a well-intended effort to bake some cookies, though it didn't seem to be going very well. Taeyong smiled at them, reckoning it had probably been Haechan's idea.
"It sure looks like it's going well.. I just wanted to see how you were doing, I guess that answers that question." Taeyong pointed at a bit of dough that had somehow gotten stuck in the youngest's hair.
"We're doing just fine. What about you? You're not secretly practicing the whole day in your room, are you?" Taeil questioned him jokingly, cocking his eyebrow up.
"No, I promise. I'm just playing around with songs. Where are the others? Are they all in their rooms?"
"Um-", Taeil was still fighting the cookie dough, "they're - could you please help me a bit, Haechan - I think they are? I saw Johnny, Yuta and Mark earlier on the upper floor. Jaehyun and Jungwoo are around here somewhere, too."
Haechan poured way too much flour out of the bag to stop the dough from sticking too much, which only ended up in a bigger mess. Taeyong sighed.
"Doyoung isn't home?"
"Hyung, isn't it your job to know where your boyfriend is at all times? You're practically attached at the hip."
The younger wasn't paying all that much attention to him, more focused on scraping the dough off the counter.
"I don't think he is, Taeyong. But I'm not sure, so you might wanna check his room."
Taeil at least dignified him with an apologetic smile before going back to their problem at hand.
Taeyong watched their struggle for a few more seconds before heading back to check Doyoung's room.
Doyoung would usually let them know whenever he left to go out, but it also wasn't unheard of that any of the members would come and go on their own accord.
Maybe he was just taking a nap, maybe he was painting the little paint-by-numbers paintings he did sometimes, which Taeyong found so incredibly adorable.
But when he gently knocked on his door and opened it, he only saw his neatly made bed.
He looked at the usual locations of his bag he took to practice and it wasn't there. Taeyong pressed his lips into a tight line, wondering if he had really gone to another dance lesson.
Doyoung had been relentless about wanting to show 'a better side' of him to the fans, which Taeyong had trouble understanding, but he might've also been a bit biased when it came to Doyoung.
He pulled his phone out of the pocket of his sweatpants to give him a call.
The insistent beeping while the phone was seemingly connecting the call never stopped. Eventually, after trying one more time, he slid his phone back into its place.
He would just have to wait for him to come back.
-
It took a few hours for Doyoung to finally wrap up the dance session with his trainer.
It was gratifying to see his form improve in the many mirrors, the hard work paying off.
He had never been particularly confident about his dancing, especially when compared to the level of the others. He was told how he was better than he thought, but he had to prove it to himself first to truthfully acknowledge it.
It took its toll on him, though.
His chest was heaving in an effort to breathe in more oxygen, he could feel one of many beads of sweat making its way down his temple, eventually hitting the floor.
His teacher praised him, handing him a bottle of water and telling him to call it a day.
"This should be the last time we meet for now. You've done well, you got this!" He told him.
Doyoung gathered his things after taking a shower and left the practice room, making his way to the dorms in the evening.
He looked out the window once he had gotten into the van and took in the sight of people living their ordinary lives, walking around the streets and ending their own stressful days.
He sighed to himself, feeling the soreness of his muscles. He pulled his phone out of his pocket to check the time, only to see a few missed calls from Taeyong.
Right, he thought. He hadn't told him he'd have another lesson before their comeback. He was probably wondering where I went.
He considered calling him back or a leaving a message, but ultimately decided against it, since he was on his way back anyway and would be there soon.
Sure enough, it only took a couple more minutes for him to reach their dorm.
Doyoung pushed the door open and discarded his bag near the entrance before going to look for Taeyong.
And he found him shortly after. Taeyong was lounging around by himself in the living room and Doyoung quietly approached him.
Taeyong didn't seem to hear him come in and when he got closer, he saw the ear plugs connected to his phone and the concentrated look on his face.
Taeyong quickly lifted his head as he noticed the movement and sat up, a smile spreading on his face.
"Hey, where have you been? I tried calling you." The older asked as he pulled Doyoung down to sit with him.
Doyoung wasn't having the sitting thing and, instead, pushed Taeyong down on the couch to lay on top of him, burying his face into his neck. He was so tired and ready to sleep right then and there.
Taeyong laughed, but let Doyoung settle on top of him anyway, bringing one hand up to stroke the back of his head.
"Dance lesson. That's why I didn't hear your call, sorry." He murmured, barely audible.
"It's okay. You're tired, huh?"
Doyoung nodded against him, still feeling the tightness in his shoulders, despite pretty much melting into Taeyong with his body.
He wrapped himself around him, groaning quietly when he felt the tension in his neck as he moved.
Taeyong obviously knew that struggle all too well.
There have been many days of Taeyong finishing grueling hours of solo dance practice, body completely at its limit and tense, only to come home to Doyoung pressing his hands into his back, loosening all the knots in his muscles.
The memory of it made him smile and he decided he'd reverse their roles.
He brought his hands down on his shoulders, massaging them firmly. He trailed some fingers up to press into the back of his neck, before dragging them back down, still applying pressure.
Doyoung pressed his face further into Taeyong's shoulder, a sigh leaving his mouth.
"Good?"
"Mm-hmm."
Taeyong chuckled, continuing kneading all the way from Doyoung's shoulders, up his neck and back down along his arms.
Taeyong spared a glance down Doyoung's face, observing his sleepy pout, with his eyes barely open.
Before he could act on his plan to press a kiss to his forehead, Doyoung pushed himself up on his hands to look down on Taeyong.
"Have the others eaten?" Doyoung asked him.
Taeyong frowned.
"Have you eaten?"
Doyoung returned the frown, reluctantly answering him.
"A bit. What'd they eat?"
Taeyong gave him a look similar to the one Doyoung always gave the other whenever he'd scold him for being too rough on himself.
"They all ate, Doyoung. Get up, I'll make something for you." The older said as he brought his hand back to run his fingers through the younger's hair.
Doyoung simply settled back onto his chest.
"I'm really not hungry. I want to go to bed." He mumbled, feeling the soft blow of air on his hair as Taeyong sighed.
He decided he'd let it go just this once. After all, he was the same after an exhausting day.
"Okay."
-
After coaxing Doyoung to go to bed with him in his room, Taeyong found himself awake and alone in his bed in the middle of the night.
His room was pitch-black, the space next to him in the bed empty. He could only see the red numbers of his alarm clock.
1:48
His mind was still blurry - he didn't know why he woke up and why Doyoung was gone. He rubbed his eyes before turning to lay on his side, pulling the blanket over himself.
With his mind still in a sleepy haze, he tried thinking of where he could've gone. Maybe to the toilet, maybe to his own room? Maybe he just went to get a drink and the sound of him in the kitchen woke Taeyong up.
His body was still heavy with sleep, he tried falling back asleep. Doyoung was probably just in his own room. Taeyong's bed wasn't the biggest after all and perhaps he wanted more space without disturbing Taeyong. It's not like it was a big deal.
Except maybe it was.
Doyoung wouldn't usually get up for such things, especially not after a tiring day.
Taeyong tried to close his eyes. It worked for a minute or two before he started feeling suffocated by not knowing where Doyoung was and kicked the blanket off.
He'd just quickly check his room to be sure. It was probably nothing anyway.
He swung his legs over the edge of the bed, stretching and yawning before going out into the hallway.
Given the time, he could clearly see the beam of light from beneath the bathroom door illuminating the hallway.
Taeyong contemplated going back to bed since, well, why should he barge in to Doyoung just doing his business?
He made another deal with himself. He'd just knock on the door to ask if he was in there and okay.
When he lifted his hand to knock, he noticed the door wasn't even locked, staying just slightly ajar. He pushed it open slightly to peek inside.
"Doyoung?"
And then he saw him. On the white tile floor, hunched over the toilet seat as he turned his head to meet Taeyong's eyes.
Taeyong hurried over, kneeling down next to him. Doyoung's hair was sticking to his forehead, his whole face was flushed.
"Hey, what's wrong? What happened?" Taeyong pushed his damp hair back, wiping the beads of sweat from his brow as he looked over him with concern.
Doyoung closed his eyes, leaning his forehead against his arms folded over the toilet seat.
"I don't know. I just don't feel good." He said, his chest heaving in heavy effort.
Taeyong looked over into the bowl of the toilet and saw nothing there. He felt the tiniest bit of relief, but even that vanished as soon as he looked back at Doyoung.
He didn't like seeing Doyoung like this. Not one bit, but he figured it wasn't really his place to tell him that.
He wondered if this was how Doyoung always felt whenever Taeyong would push himself too much.
"Stress and exhaustion can do that to you. You haven't been taking it easy lately."
Taeyong didn't want it to sound like a scolding, but he couldn't help it. He started gently stroking Doyoung's back and the latter didn't argue with him.
"I know" was all he said.
He stayed there with him in silence in the brightly lit bathroom for a while longer, keeping the consistent pace of his hand over his back as he waited for Doyoung to gather himself.
Eventually, the younger pushed himself away from the toilet to sit back on his heels, pressing his hands over his face.
"Let's get you back to bed, okay?"
Doyoung removed his hands to reveal his now less flushed face, but more puffy eyes. The exhaustion was written all over his face.
He nodded slightly, rubbing over his stomach gently as he got up from the floor with Taeyong's arm securely around his back.
Taeyong helped him splash his face with water and dry it off. As he gingerly dragged the towel over Doyoung's cheeks and forehead, he couldn't help but admire the sight of the boy in front of him.
They knew the career choice they made was a rough one, but as hard as times got, they still loved it and wouldn't give it up for the world.
All their hard work paid off once they got onto the stage and saw the smiles on their fans' faces, heard their loud cheers.
But for Taeyong, it was even more: seeing Doyoung's face light up in front of the crowd, singing his heart out like it was all that mattered to him.
His love for Doyoung, his resilience and his honesty grew with every performance.
It reminded him of a much more carefree Doyoung in their rookie days, when they weren't as famous as they were now, but his passion had always stayed the same.
His smile finding its way back onto his face no matter what and Taeyong never wanted to miss out on seeing that happen.
Everything was a bit easier knowing they had each other whenever things got too overwhelming.
Just like now.
Taeyong led him out to the dark hallway and instructed him to go back to bed first, giving his hand an affirmative squeeze as he did.
Meanwhile, he started rummaging around in their kitchen, looking for any kind of tea and some left-over honey without making too much noise. He could only hope the kettle wouldn't wake everyone up.
After a semi-successful attempt at making tea to calm Doyoung (who knows how old that tea is, he had to scrape every last bit of honey out of the jar), he quickly snuck back to his room.
He managed not to spill everything all over the place as he set the tea down on his night stand in the darkness, not wanting to disturb the other who had hidden under the blankets by turning the lights on.
"Doyochi, get up."
Doyoung stuck his little head out at the nickname, the red light of the alarm clock illuminating his face just enough for Taeyong to see the absolutely adorable pout on his face.
It most likely wasn't visible to the other, but Taeyong still smiled at him sweetly before sitting down next to him, urging him to sit up and handing him the mug after blowing on it.
Taeyong's fingers crept up his back again, the soft comforting touch warming Doyoung's heart alongside the tea.
"Are you feeling better?" The older asked and moved even closer to him.
Doyoung replied with a hum and blew over the tea again.
The dark room felt much smaller as they sat so close together.
It was intimate in its own way, because for the few minutes that it took Doyoung to drink up, it was quiet, there was no rush. There was no need to hide from anyone, it was just them.
Taeyong unconsciously wrapped his arm around Doyoung's waist and leaned his head against his shoulder, pressing kisses on it intermittently. He wished they could stay like that forever.
He got lost in thought, enjoying the moment and it took a nudge from Doyoung for him to move back and hold up the blanket for him to crawl under.
They settled close to each other - Doyoung laying his head on top of Taeyong's stretched out arm.
"Are you sure you're okay?"
It barely came out as a whisper, the safe and calm atmosphere in the air coaxing them to fall asleep.
"I will be. My dance lessons are over for now." Doyoung's voice was muffled, his face pressed into the side of Taeyong's neck.
The older let out a huff of laughter, tightening his arm around Doyoung.
"Well, yes. But you gotta be careful all the time, okay? And don't spend so many hours practicing next time. It's been getting harder and harder to keep up my dancer image with you improving twice as much in half the time."
Doyoung giggled against him softly and pressed a kiss to his neck. Taeyong's ability to lighten up any situation made him love him more and more with each joke.
"Watch out, Lee Taeyong."