Work Text:
Elsa could do this. She could absolutely do this. She was salutatorian of her high school and had to give a speech in front of three hundred students as well as countless family and faculty members. She graduated college a year early. She had to work her way from the bottom up at her job. She not only played a part in redesigning some of the most notorious buildings in the town of Arendelle but also earned her spot as the head of a new project in designing a completely new landmark. She headed the committee for, in addition to submitting, the winning design for the mural in the town square. Hell, she was hand chosen by the firm’s president himself to attend a convention in California on his behalf.
Surely she could handle a few hours of karaoke.
Elsa paused, staring through the thin frames of her driving glasses across the parking lot. She had secured a spot towards the back; perhaps not the best location considering the party was going to go on well past midnight, but a parking space was a parking space. The flashing neon sign reading The Snuggly Duckling was as clear as day, particularly against the darkened sky.
She questioned Anna’s choices so much. Out of all the places she could have had her bachelorette party, no matter how few people, why did it have to be a karaoke bar called The Snuggly Duckling?
Of course, for the sake of her own sanity it was probably best to simply stop questioning Anna’s choices altogether.
The blonde leaned her head back, hitting the faux leather driving seat. There were so many reasons Elsa would rather just drive home and hide under her blankets. She didn’t like crowds. Hell, she didn’t even like parties. What was so wrong with having a small intimate gathering of just her and Anna at one of their houses? She didn’t like singing in front of people. She wasn’t social. With her buttoned-up blouse, thin-rimmed driving glasses, navy blue leggings and low heels, her always-tied back platinum blonde locks, not to mention her signature stare – the one Anna swore could turn someone to ice upon direct contact – everything about Elsa likely screamed for people to back off.
Or, at the very least, that she was a prude.
It wasn’t that Elsa cared about any of those things. Sure, they were frustrating and likely hindered her social life as well as her as a person, but there was a more glaring reason as to why she would have given anything in that moment to speed home.
Maren Naturra.
Elsa had no problem with Maren and Anna remaining friends after they broke up. In fact, something that Elsa and Anna always prided themselves in was that they got along great with each other’s partners. Elsa and Kristoff would talk about animals and gawk at adorable cat videos on YouTube while Maren and Anna would go out exploring or to a bar or just…actual, normal, people things. However the thing that Elsa never considered was how things would look in the future. Of course Anna would invite Maren to the bachelorette party. And to the wedding. And probably to a ton of other milestone celebrations. Elsa didn’t care if Anna hung out with Maren still; she just….
Was it supposed to be that difficult to face her ex? Even if there was no rule that said they had to interact?
Who was Elsa kidding? Of course she was going to have to talk to Maren. But no matter how much she tried to mentally prepare herself for it, Elsa could never find the right words. She could never actually get anything semi-decent to escape her lips let alone sound like she was doing remotely all right.
How could she when it would be a lie anyway? It was Elsa’s fault they broke up in the first place. She had buried herself too deep into her work to have alone time with Maren. There was never any time. And whenever Elsa did manage to make some time, it would always go to Anna. Though not her intention, Elsa made it painfully clear that her job and the money was her priority; not Maren. The dreams they had originally planned together, the hopes they had for one another, the journeys they wanted to go on, the millions of things they wanted to do and see and explore together…. A million dreams for the world they were never going to make.
Elsa sighed. It was getting late. She should have already been inside. But how much longer could she possibly stall? Maybe if she was lucky, she could duck out early under the guise of realizing she had an early meeting.
Or not.
Probably not at all.
But she could still try.
Taking a deep breath, Elsa pushed the car door open and exited. She locked it and approached the building, heels clicking against the concrete ground. She kept her steps light, her posture straight, her arms at her side, and her gaze narrow. As long as she could keep up the workingwoman ruse she could maybe survive the night.
It wasn’t difficult to spot Anna, especially when the bar wasn’t very large to begin with. Even from the entrance, Elsa could see clearly across to the other side of the building where the stage was. There were a dozen or so tables, if Elsa had to estimate, although there were some stools by the bar as well up against the walls. The bar was located to her far left, and to the far right was the narrow hallway to the restrooms. There was almost a rustic feel to the interior, although Elsa could have sworn the gentleman manning the karaoke machine had a hook for a hand.
She shook her head. Anna, what am I going to do with you, she thought.
“ELSA!”
The blonde picked up her head. At one of the tables in front to the far right, the redhead waved eagerly. Elsa gulped. She could easily make out the woman sitting next to Anna as their cousin Rapunzel. Ok, she was off to a good start. Elsa began stepping forward and, as she closed in on her target, she was able to recognize another familiar face in the form of Tiana, Anna’s high school friend as well as the caterer for the wedding. So far so good, as Tiana was a levelheaded person who balanced Anna out quite well. Perhaps it wouldn’t be terrible for Elsa after all.
Then she saw her. Long, thick brunette hair tied back in a messy braid. Black motorcycle jacket over her broad shoulders, likely covering a simple plain tee or tank top. A black chocker coupled with a small gem that added just the faintest touch of class, likely a suggestion of Anna’s. Honey eyes that could sparkle underneath even the dimmest lights. And, to top it off, her signature tan beanie with a single pride pin attached.
By all accounts, the contrasting appearances of Elsa and Maren should not have ever worked together in any capacity. But, at one point in time, opposites attracted.
All too well, sadly, to Elsa’s recollection.
Anna jumped out of her seat and ran to her sister, pulling her into a tight hug. “You made it you made it you made it!” she exclaimed.
“Uh…. Of course?” Elsa answered, though it came out as more of a question.
Anna pulled back and studied her sister’s appearance. “What did you do, come from a meeting again?”
“Well, kind of…” she started.
Anna waved her hand. “Oh, never mind. All we have to do is make a few changes. Lose the driving glasses, undo the first button…actually, you know what? Make it the top two buttons. You should definitely show off. Oh, let me get your hair, it is WAY better when it’s down!”
“Anna!” Elsa gasped, however it was too late. Anna was already working her magic. She pulled Elsa’s glasses off her face and shoved them into her pale hands, carefully undid the top two buttons of her blouse – though, Elsa supposed she should be grateful that Anna at least took the time to adjust her collar properly – and then made her way to Elsa’s braid. The braid proved a bit more difficult, as Elsa was someone who was quite detail-oriented and made sure no hair was out of place when possible. Once Anna navigated through the strands and untangled them, she gently ran her fingers through her sister’s wavy locks.
“Perfect!” Anna smiled proudly at her work. She grabbed her sister’s hand and pulled her the rest of the way. “Now we can really get this party started!”
Elsa’s mind blurred as greetings were exchanged despite the overall friendly faces. As relieved as she should have been that Anna only gathered a small handful of them together, it still felt awkward as hell sitting next to Maren. Whenever she found possible, Elsa ran her hand over her hair as if to use it as a shield to block her from the gorgeous woman sitting beside her.
What were the odds Anna made sure they sat next to each other on purpose?
And what were the odds that Anna was purposefully conversing with only Rapunzel and Tiana so Elsa would have no choice but to speak to Maren?
Maybe Elsa could fiddle with her phone. Make it appear she had a work thing. A phone call, an email, a…a…. No, not Words With Friends!
“Uliknace.”
Elsa blinked at the mumbling she thought she heard. Although, to be fair, someone from another table had gone up to sing. A very questionable Lady Gaga cover, she might add.
But it wasn’t Anna, Rapunzel, or Tiana…. So that had to have meant….
Elsa slowly turned her head towards Maren. She hoped that was who was just speaking to her.
Or not.
Or yes?
“I’m sorry…?”
Maren cleared her throat. She raised her voice slightly, just enough for Elsa to be able to hear over the singing. “I said, you look nice.”
Elsa turned her head away and set her phone down. She was unsure if it was nerves or the fact that Maren wasn’t even looking at her. Great, now Maren felt obligated to speak to Elsa simply because Anna had to get lost in some crazy story from the old days.
“Oh…. Thank you….” Elsa replied, though perhaps still a bit too soft to hear clearly.
No response.
She should say something back, right?
Maren did just compliment her, after all.
Even if it was only an obligation.
She should definitely respond.
Elsa willed her ice blue eyes to her ex. “Um…you…you grew your hair out again.”
Maren gave a nod, but was still avoiding Elsa’s gaze. “Yeah…. Yeah, to…. I’m planning on donating to Locks of Love.”
Of course she was.
Despite Maren’s tough girl exterior, she never hesitated to help someone in need.
“That’s wonderful,” Elsa responded although it didn’t feel like high enough praise.
“It was Ryder’s idea, actually,” the brunette admitted. “He was able to donate a couple of inches last time. Got me wanting to help out, too.”
That didn’t surprise Elsa, either. Ryder, Maren’s younger brother, was only a barista at Starbuck’s, but even with the little he had to his name he still found a way to donate to important causes. Elsa could still recall the one year where he dragged two giant Hefty bags full of toys to the local Dairy Queen for their annual Toys for Tots drive.
“How is Ryder, by the way?”
Maren’s shoulders fell a bit. She always relaxed when talking about her brother. “Good. Still at Starbuck’s. He’s…he’s finding his place. It’s been…difficult.”
“How has he handled everything? Oh…Anna mentioned…. Is that ok…?”
“It’s fine. Yeah, he’s…he’s a trooper. He’s fostered a few pets since. I would’ve never been able to.”
“Does he still throw going away parties for them?”
“Every time. His last foster was this bull mix, she always looked like she was so pissed but Ryder swore she was the sweetest dog ever.”
“So losing Gale hasn’t deterred him…?”
“He was super attached, but I think he’s been good. He just…. He just puts all that time into everyone and everything else. I wish he’d do something more for himself.”
A pause.
“And you…?”
“What about me?”
“You always said you wanted to open your own tattoo parlor.”
Finally Maren allowed herself to look at Elsa. Her look, however, was colder than the blonde expected. “You remembered?”
Elsa blinked. “Uh…of course I did. It…it was your dream.”
Maren folded her arms stubbornly. “I had a lot of dreams.”
Ouch.
Elsa deserved that, she supposed. And she couldn’t blame Maren one bit. Elsa still remembered every one of Maren’s dreams, but they were dreams that were crushed when they broke up.
Even though Maren was the one who dumped Elsa – and rightfully so – Elsa was still the one who caused the destruction.
“I think I’ll get a drink,” Elsa decided softly. She pushed herself from the chair and treaded to the other side. She sat on one of the empty bar stools, glancing at the drink selections while waiting for the bartender with the rather large nose to finish with his current client. Options, options…. Elsa wasn’t much of a drinker to begin with. She could keep it simple and order a Sprite or a seltzer. Or perhaps a virgin pina colada. But something told her she was going to need an actual drink to survive the night.
“What’ll it be, miss?” the bartender asked.
Elsa sighed. “Got anything for a girl trying to survive her sister’s bachelorette party with her ex?”
He rubbed his chin. “Well I recommend something sweet or fruity if you wanna make up with them. If you wanna get wasted and get some revenge, something much stronger. Or if you wanna keep it simple and let your sister have a good night, we got some Mike’s Hard Lemonade on deck. Just enough alcohol to feel a buzz, but not enough to get drunk. Personally I’d go with the sweet route. Maybe something you both liked so they’d notice you got their drink and they’d want a sip so you’d end up sharing and then reminiscing….”
Elsa hit her head against the counter. So The Snuggly Duckling had a hopeless romantic as the barkeep tonight of all nights. Just Elsa’s luck.
“Chocolate martini for my friend, please, and I’ll take you up on that hard lemonade. Got a cherry one back there?”
“You got it!”
Elsa lifted her head. She blinked in surprise to see her cousin occupying the empty stool next to her. “Rapunzel? But why aren’t you…?”
“I figured you could use some backup,” she replied. “Besides, we can sit here for a couple of minutes. Tia’s got the first song of the group so when she’s done we gotta have a drink ready for her. You know we have to get something in her system before she goes for round two.”
“And Anna and Maren?” the blonde required.
“They’ll be fine. They won’t miss us for two minutes,” Rapunzel promised. Her green eyes suddenly lit up as Tiana walked on stage. “WOOOOO!” she cheered, throwing her fist in the air. “GET IT, TIANA!”
In the South Land there’s a city
Way down on the river
Where the women are very pretty
And all the men deliver
Tiana’s voice somehow rang through the bar yet remained completely in control. There was power in her vocals, but she never overdid it to the point where Elsa could not hear anything else around her. She wished some of the other singers would take a cue from her.
“So,” Rapunzel refocused her attention to Elsa. “How are you holding up?”
That could go in so many directions. “With…?”
Rapunzel’s eyes darted towards the table and then back to Elsa.
The blonde sighed. “Terrible,” she confessed. “We were kind of ok talking about Ryder but then I asked about the tattoo parlor…”
Rapunzel grit her teeth. “Oooooo, yeah maybe probably not the greatest idea ever.”
“Thanks,” she muttered.
“I didn’t mean it like that!” she promised. “It’s just….” She sighed. “It’s kinda been a sore spot for Maren.”
Elsa furrowed her brows. “I thought she was almost there. When we….” She cut herself off and then sadly shook her head. “She only needed a few hundred dollars.”
“It’s not my place to say.” Rapunzel thanked the bartender for their drinks and handed the martini to Elsa. “All I can say is, things changed. I think…. I think she kinda gave up on that dream.”
Elsa’s face fell. “She gave up everything because of me,” she realized quietly.
“Well…if you still feel that bad, maybe just talk to her?” she suggested. “I know it seems hard and scary but, you don’t wanna avoid her forever right? She’s Anna’s friend, too. And no one said that there’s no chance of things changing back. Who knows. But you can’t spend all your time hiding or thinking about the what if’s. Just give it a chance. And if you’re not gonna do it for yourself, then do it for Anna.”
Noticing that Tiana’s song would end shortly, Rapunzel ordered her friend a margarita and then retreated to the table with her drink in tow.
Elsa sighed. Rapunzel did have a point. No matter what her and Maren’s history was, they would always be connected through Anna. Elsa knew Maren cared about Anna; she wouldn’t be here celebrating something so big with them if she and Anna weren’t close. And no matter who came or went in Elsa’s life, Anna would always be the most important person to her. Elsa rarely did anything for the sake of herself; but she would always make an attempt for Anna. Maybe there was a next right thing to do.
Clearing her throat, Elsa turned to the bartender. “Excuse me?” She pointed to their table. “The woman in the motorcycle jacket with the beanie? If she comes, her favorite drink is a whiskey on the rocks. It’s on me.”
He nodded and gave her a wink. “Good luck, my friend.”
Exhaling, Elsa made her way back to the table. Tiana and Maren were the only ones there while Anna and Rapunzel were just diving into their take of Mama Mia.
Look at me now! Will I ever learn?
I don’t know how but I suddenly lose control
Every damn time. Elsa should have known the lyrics to that song by heart already. She made a comment, half expecting Maren to respond. After all, she had been forced to sit through the movies as many times as Elsa. But when the brunette didn’t comment, Tiana did. It disappointed Elsa slightly, but she couldn’t force Maren to interact with her. Maybe she just needed some more time.
A few sentences in, Maren became visibly annoyed and left to the bar. Elsa’s eyes followed her carefully. She watched as she approached the counter. Maren leaned over, probably asking for a drink. The barkeep held up a finger, implying he knew exactly what she wanted. Maren flinched. The bartender pointed in Elsa’s direction. Maren’s head turned. Elsa gulped. The next thing she knew, Maren was storming back over to the table.
“What the hell??” she demanded.
Elsa’s eyes fluttered. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out.
“You really think you can make things better with a drink? Do you really think that’s enough?”
“I…I just thought…” Elsa started.
“That’s just it! You thought. That’s all you do. You thought about work. You thought about your projects. You thought about the money. You thought about Anna. You thought about the stupid, little things. But you never thought about me!” she argued.
“I…I did….” Elsa stammered.
“No!” Maren fought. “You didn’t. You were so caught up thinking of your own life you never thought about my life. Our life!”
Elsa stood from her seat. “I did think about our life! I’ve thought about it every day!”
“Well you sure have a funny way of showing it,” Maren sneered. She held up her hands, not giving Elsa a chance to retort. “You know what? Don’t worry about it. And don’t worry about me. I’m done. With both of you.”
“Maren!” Elsa gasped.
“Ok Maren you’re next,” Anna smiled returning to the group. “I got your song all set, I know what you like!” Her smile quickly faded when she noticed the tension. “Uhhhh what’s going on here…?”
Maren sighed and turned to her friend. “I’ll do the song. But then I’m gonna bounce.”
“What?” her eyes widened. “Why?”
“I just can’t keep sticking around. Not if it’s gonna be like this.”
“But…”
Maren stepped up to the stage, grasping the microphone from one of the stands between her palms. She breathed in as the instrumentals began.
With a confused look, Anna turned to the only person who could have any answers. Elsa.
“Elsa what’s….”
“I’m sorry, Anna,” the blonde choked. She turned on her heel and ran in the direction of the bathroom. She couldn’t take it. She couldn’t stand out there and listen to Maren sing. She couldn’t stand out there and look at Anna’s disappointed face. She couldn’t stand there knowing she not only single handedly destroyed one of Anna’s friendships but also that she ruined the bachelorette party. Elsa frantically paced around the single stalled restroom, trying and failing to block out the song.
I close my eyes and I can see
The world that’s waiting up for me
That I call my own
Through the dark, through the door
Through where no one’s been before
But it feels like home
God that woman’s voice was so underrated! At first listen, it sounded so simple. But Elsa knew exactly how Maren could get when she sang. When she got lost in a song. She heard it every time she secretly eavesdropped on her singing in the shower. She heard it when they sang to the radio on their last road trip. She heard it when they sang along to movies like A Star is Born and Rocketman. Maren’s voice started out so simply that if someone weren’t paying attention, they wouldn’t understand where such power came from as the song progressed. They would be missing out on watching and hearing the woman get completely engulfed in the lyrics.
They can say, they can say it all sounds crazy
They can say, they can say I’ve lost my mind
I don’t care, I don’t care so call me crazy
We can live in a world that we design
Elsa folded her arms across her chest, wishing with every fiber of her being she could block out the voice. That she could stop imagining all the times they sang along to that very song. Elsa still recalled when The Greatest Showman came out into theaters. She went to see it with Anna once for Elsa’s birthday, and then insisted that Maren see it. The two of them went together on a date and Maren commented on all of the movie’s lowlights. Elsa specifically recalled Maren saying that A Million Dreams was one of the sappiest songs she’d ever heard.
Yet she surprised Elsa by taking her to see it again. She bought Elsa the movie when it was first released on DVD and Bluray. She sat with Elsa that first night, listening to her sing along to all of the songs and trying so hard to hold back her comments. But every time after that, Maren would always give in and sing along with Elsa. And despite her claim against A Million Dreams, somehow she was always not-so-secretly singing that song. There had only been one instance when Elsa let Maren speak through the entire movie. It was the worst viewings of the Greatest Showman she ever had.
But Maren’s reactions were absolutely worth it. They were shocked. They were bored. They were priceless. There were even gag faces galore. And Elsa loved every second of it.
What she wouldn’t give to go back to that. Back to their own little world. Back to all the plans they made. Back to the dreams they were building towards. For them. Together.
Cause every night I lie in bed
The brightest colors fill my head
A million dreams are keeping me awake
“Elsa?”
Elsa shook her head, quickly rubbing her eyes to stop the tears that were threatening to fall. “Go away, Anna.”
The door opened anyway. Anna stepped in and walked over to her sister. She gently placed her head against Elsa’s back, wrapping her arms around her front. “I’m sorry, Elsa.”
“You’re sorry?” Elsa sniffed. “I just ruined your party. I’m the one who should be sorry. I mean…” She rubbed her nose with her wrist. “I hope you’re sorry, you left the damn door opened.”
“Not about that,” she shook her head. “I’m sorry that I didn’t realize how hard it was gonna be for you. Or for Maren.”
“We should have known better,” she whispered. “But that doesn’t make it right.”
“It doesn’t make it right what I did, either. I just wanted the people I cared most about together tonight. I didn’t think about how much it would bother either of you. You just…. We never talk about it.”
How could they, though, when it broke Elsa’s heart to mention it every time?
I think of what the world could be
A vision of the one I see
A million dreams is all it’s gonna take
A million dreams for the world we’re gonna make
“You know I don’t talk,” Elsa sniffed.
“That’s because you always bury yourself in your work.” Anna paused and took a step back. “Did…did you ever tell her? About the check?”
She shook her head.
Anna’s eyes widened. “Elsa it’s been two years. Where has it been all this time?”
“The glove compartment,” she admitted quietly.
“So you’re telling me you’ve had an out-standing check for five hundred dollars just sitting in your car for the last two years?” she gasped. “Why didn’t you ever give it to her??”
Elsa groaned and spun around to face her. “When, Anna? When? When we had that argument? When I came home to see her packing her things? When we were screaming at each other? When I watched her walk out and never look back??”
Anna grabbed Elsa’s shoulders. “Yes! You could have told her! That could have stopped her!”
“No! No it wouldn’t!” Elsa argued, pulling back. “It wouldn’t have been enough. Even if it would have been enough for the down-payment it wouldn’t have been enough to save our relationship!”
“ARGGG!” Anna screamed, “IT WOULDN’T HAVE BEEN ENOUGH MONEY NO MATTER WHAT BECAUSE SHE WASN’T GOING TO GET THE PARLOR! SHE HAD A RING, ELSA! SHE USED THE MONEY FOR THE PARLOR TO BUY YOU A FUCKING RING!”
There’s a house we can build
Every room inside is filled
With things from far away
Elsa froze. She stared at Anna in complete awe. Had she heard her correctly?
Elsa remembered the day so clearly. Maren was in their bedroom packing her things. They were supposed to go on a trip together. It was a business trip, but Elsa was going to surprise Maren by keeping the hotel room an extra two nights. They would sightsee together and then, the night before leaving, Elsa would give her the check. She was going to admit that all the extra hours she was putting in, all the extra work she was doing, all the time she was spending away from home – from them – was for Maren. So she could finally open her tattoo parlor.
But instead of packing for the trip, Maren was packing everything. Elsa would have never guessed that somewhere in the confines of Maren’s luggage there would have been a ring. When did she buy it? How long did she have it for? When did she change her mind? Did she even still have it?
But that was such a naïve question. If Maren returned the ring, she would have gotten her money back. She would have opened her parlor. She’d be living her dream right now. Instead she had a constant reminder of the future that would never be.
Her voice came out in complete shock, a tone that by all means Anna should not have heard at all.
“Wha…. What…?”
Special things I compile
Each one there to make you smile
On a rainy day
Anna sighed. “I promised I wouldn’t say anything. But she was going to propose, Elsa. She had a plan. And then…. Then your business trip came from out of nowhere. And she….”
“She felt like I was choosing work over her,” Elsa realized.
That was why she was packing to leave. That’s why Maren screamed the way she did. That was why she looked at hurt as she did. All that time…all that time Maren was going to propose. And Elsa had been so focused on getting the rest of the money for Maren, doing everything she could to make sure the jobs went flawless and they could still have something leftover for after…. Money to save for a rainy day. Money for one of their trips. Money to buy the vintage car Maren always wanted. Money to donate to the dude ranch Elsa visited as a child. Money so they could move into a bigger house. Money so they could adopt a cat. Or a dog. Or a rabbit. Or a monkey, for all Elsa cared; any pet Maren wanted. Money so they could one day start their own family.
There Elsa had been focusing on the millions of dreams they were supposed to share, the ones they were going to create and live out together. It turned out that all that time, Maren only had one dream.
They can say, they can say it all sounds crazy
They can say, they can say we’ve lost our minds
I don’t care, I don’t care if they call us crazy
Run away to a world that we design
Elsa’s legs caved from underneath her. She collapsed onto the bathroom floor in a near fetal position. Her back was hunched. One hand was flat against the floor and the other pressed against her forehead. Her head hung with absolutely no care of the locks that flopped over her were touching the floor. Her chest heaved, unable to keep up with the racing of her heart. Tears poured from her eyes as realization completely overtook her.
She wanted that world back.
She wanted those dreams back.
She wanted their dreams back.
Every night I lie in bed
The brightest colors fill my head
A million dreams are keeping me awake
Elsa barely registered her sister getting down beside her and pulling her into her arms. It wasn’t until she was fully in Anna’s embrace that Elsa remotely began to calm down. She wasn’t sure if it was the way Anna always caressed her back or if it was the mere presence of the redhead. The only other person who could make Elsa feel at such ease in a matter of seconds besides Maren was Anna.
“You need to tell her, Elsa,” she whispered.
Elsa shook her head. “It’s too late,” she whispered in defeat.
“You still have to try.” She paused and sighed. “I’m sorry. Maybe I should have said something sooner but…it wasn’t my place to get involved. I guess…I guess part of me was just hoping that if I kept you both around then sooner or later you would’ve found your way back together.”
Elsa sniffed loudly. “We’re useless lesbians, Anna. That’s not how we operate.”
“So…so you’re just gonna let that stop you from being together?” she asked confused.
“I don’t know….” She groaned.
“But you still love her…?” Anna asked as if to look for confirmation.
I think of what the world could be
A vision of the one I see
Elsa had tried her best to hide it. She avoided the topic. She buried herself in her work. But nothing could ever compare to the heaviness in her heart when she so much as heard Anna imply something about Maren in conversation. And that she would give anything to hear those words from Maren again.
“I do.”
“Then you need to get your ass up there and tell her,” Anna decided. She helped her sister up off the floor and then carefully let her back towards the bar. The younger didn’t waste any time. As soon as they were close enough, Anna rushed to grab the second microphone.
Maren’s confused look was not lost on Elsa. She watched as the woman went from perplexed to shocked to pure horror.
Oh god, pure horror.
Elsa was the last thing Maren wanted up there.
She could hear the tone, even feel the temperature in the building, drop as Anna placed the mike in Elsa’s hand.
A million dreams is all it’s gonna take
Anna gave her sister one final push towards the stage. Elsa gulped, eyes widening as they focused only on Maren.
A million dreams for the world we’re gonna make
This was it. It was now or never.
Although now would have been a lot nicer with a stronger drink in her.
Elsa’s voice came out a bit throatier than intended. She was unsure if it was the nerves or if she was sill recovering from her emotions.
But if this was her only chance to prove something to Maren – if it was her last chance – she had to persevere.
However big, however small
Let me be part of it all
She shakily ascended the first step, then the second. She gulped in mid-sentence, no doubt adding to the already begging quality.
Share your dreams with me
She wanted that.
She wanted that more than anything.
She wanted all of that and more with Maren.
It was time she stopped hiding and faking.
She was going to get her shit together and sing to the love of her life.
We may be right, we may be wrong
But I wanna bring you along
To the world I see
For every step closer she took, Maren took a small one back. She was hesitant, and rightfully so. But the moment their voices overlapped for the first time during the bridge, Maren was frozen in place and her eyes glued to Elsa’s.
To the world we close our eyes to see
We close our eyes to see
There was still hesitancy behind Maren’s gaze, as if to search for any doubt in Elsa’s. If she was lying. If it was some sort of ruse. It was as if she were afraid to put any trust into them again, after the first time failed so miserably. Even the tone of her voice in the next line mirrored that, switching from the original icy tone to a questioning one.
Every night I lie in bed
The brightest colors fill my head
Elsa was never one to maintain eye contact. She hated when she had to do it one-on-one and she despised it during business meetings. But with Maren, she fought for that gaze. She fought to once again see the honey color in her eyes. She fought for Maren. With another step forward, Elsa’s voice steadied and she sung softly, almost hopefully.
A million dreams are keeping me awake
She held the last note, the last syllable, for as long as she possibly could. She held it even as Maren’s next line began to overlap. She held it even as she felt her breath wear out. She held it until she couldn’t hold it anymore and then paused for the briefest moment to sing in tune with Maren again.
I think of what the world could be
A vision of the one I see
A million dreams is all it’s gonna take
They each took a step closer. Elsa felt herself get lost in Maren’s voice at last, feeling not just the power behind it, but at long last the emotion and the conviction.
A million dreams for the world we’re gonna make
They paused, after raising their voices together in perfect harmony for the highest octave. Their gazes maintained. Elsa’s heart rate increased. Let the last line be to me, she prayed selfishly. As much as she didn’t deserve it, as much as she shouldn’t have the second chance, she just needed that last line to show that maybe, just maybe, Maren could still want all those dreams with her.
And together, for the last time, their voices blended softly and perfectly.
For the world we’re gonna make
Everything was a blur. All Elsa could focus on was how close she had gotten to Maren. How somehow during the last chorus their faces were merely inches apart. Should she…? Could she…?
But then Maren stepped back. She placed the mike back on its stand and was about to start down the stairs. Elsa’s jaw dropped slightly and her shoulders slumped. There was only one thought running through her head, one heartbroken realization.
It hadn’t been enough.
“Elsa!”
The blonde turned her head. Anna was leaning up against the stage, frantically waving the check. She must have gone out to Elsa’s car to retrieve it! With wide eyes, Elsa grabbed the check and then looked up to see Maren heading for the door.
“Maren wait!”
She hadn’t realized right away she spoke into the microphone. Whether the sudden loudness was what got Maren to halt or if it was simply Elsa’s voice, she didn’t care. Dropping the mike, Elsa ran to catch Maren in the middle of the room. She stopped just behind her, taking only a second to catch her breath. Her free hand went to Maren’s shoulder and the woman turned sharply, causing Elsa to drop her arm. The blonde paid no attention to the sting of the action. Instead, she held out the check.
“I’ve been holding onto this for two years, three months, and six days. I was going to give it to you on our trip. For your tattoo parlor. I knew how close you were. I wanted…I wanted to do it for you. I worked. I worked nonstop. I worked too much. I worked for you. Because I wanted you to have your parlor, Maren. I wanted to get it for you. I still want to get it for you. I’ll pay for the whole thing if you’ll let me. I know it can’t bring back any of the time we lost. I know it can’t possibly be enough to make things right. I was just willing to do anything to make your dream a reality. So much so that I overworked to make all of our dreams a reality. But none of that work, none of this, is worth it if it costs me you. I want our million dreams, Maren. I want them all with you. But if only one of them can be a reality…. I know what my one dream is. It’s not to work at my firm. It’s not to design grandiose buildings. Or to travel. Or to live in a mansion. It’s you, Maren. And I’m so, so sorry it took me all this time to realize that. Maren Naturra, will you please take this check to make your one dream a reality?”
Part of Elsa wanted to say more. She wanted to ask if there was any way Maren would allow her the honor of sharing that one dream with her. But that felt like too much. She didn’t earn the right to ask that. And with the way Maren stared at her stoically, almost blankly, Elsa had no idea what to expect. There was every chance that she didn’t say enough. Maren could decide to take the check and walk away forever. She could just walk away forever. She could forgive Elsa. She could scream at Elsa.
She just wished that the woman would react already. Elsa didn’t care what Maren would say. No, that was a lie. Of course she cared. She cared more than anything. She just needed to see something. To hear something. Anything.
Finally, Maren raised a hand. Carefully, she removed the check from Elsa’s hand. Her look remained the same. Why did Maren have to have such a damn good poker face? She stared at the check. Her eyes darted to Elsa for a millisecond, and then back to the check. Elsa’s eyes widened slightly and her breath felt caught in her throat. Her hands involuntarily retreated into her chest, one fist cupping tightly over her heart and the other grabbing her fist. She tried not to show any emotion this time. She didn’t want to get her hopes up. Nor did she want Maren to feel obligated to say something in particular.
Then, much to Elsa’s surprise, Maren ripped the check in half. A faint gasp escaped her and Maren tore the check again. She tore it until the pieces were too tiny to put back together. But before Elsa could respond, Maren threw her hands up. The snippets of paper flew into the air and trickled down slowly like the first light snowfall of the winter. Then, in the same motion, Maren took a step forward and closed the gap between them. Her hands quickly found their way to Elsa’s waist and their lips crashed against each other’s.
Elsa let out an audible gasp at the sudden sensation. How quickly it happened. How easily it seemed to come back to Maren. How warm she felt against Maren’s body. How soft her lips were. It was a sensation Elsa thought she had long forgotten and believed she would not have the privilege of experiencing again. Yet somehow it felt like they never stopped. It was second nature to her. It was home. And the second she felt Maren’s lips release hers, she quickly grasped them again and snaked her arms around Maren’s neck, somehow pulling the woman closer. There was no way in hell she was going to lose her again. Finally, any fear of the unknown, their past, or their future was gone. The thoughts were as minuscule as the pieces of paper. Her only thought, her only care, her only focus, her only dream, was right there in her arms. And not even Anna’s questionable declaration could deter Elsa.
“Best. Bachelorette. Party. EVER!!!”