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Chapter Text

It was like looking into a mirror and seeing an image of his younger self. Why hasn't he noticed this before? All those times when they have spent much time in the presence of each other. Why only now, at this particular point in time?

King Gwanghae raised his sword upwards until the tip barely reached the tip of his son's chin.

"You asked me once if I abandoned you because of what I heard from the fortune teller. Yes, that was why. Not only that I abandon you, but I also killed the woman who uttered such words and her daughter. I ordered my men to kill Yun Jeo as well."

Nokdu's eyes started to fill with tears again as the child cast a sorrowful look towards him. Suddenly, he wondered if he himself had looked like that when he was younger, facing the same accusation from his own father...

"Do not look at me like that. I did what I ought to do. Look. Just as predicted, you coveted my throne and tried to steal it. And you declared that I was dead when I was not." He lowered his sword before continuing again, "Do you wish to deny it? Tell me what you were doing here... unless you were trying to revolt against me? Why did you hide your identity and stay by my side? Why did you make me trust you... and confide everything in you?"

Even as he said it, the answers to his questions already appeared in his mind. This innocent child... even now, he couldn't believe how Nokdu had managed to remain by his side and not be disgusted by what he had shown them of himself. All of his inner conflicts, all of his darkest secrets... all of the ugliness of his heart that he didn't want anyone else to see.

"I abandoned you! I tried to kill you countless times! You must have despised me to death! Is that not true? I asked if that was not true?"

A part of him had wished to hear his son denying his accusation. Part of him wanted to hear his son accept him and tell him that they loved him. But he knew that his sins towards his son were too great; there's no way such a good son would want him as a father. Not anymore...!

"Yes, that is true. I hate you. I resent you to death."

He nodded slightly at the response.

"Yes, you probably did. That must be why... that you plotted an awful revolt like this."

Strangely enough, despite how much of Nokdu's words have pierced his heart... it left him with a sense of relief.

"You stayed by my side to deceive me and to take revenge against me. You have prepared a lot."

Because that was the most reasonable reaction he'd imagine Nokdu would do. Why wouldn't they? After that child had seen and heard all of the cruelty that he had done. After the child had witnessed first-hand how he had tortured Yun Jeo...

"Yes. You will not believe anything that I say."

Ah, finally, the child will reveal their true colours!

"Will you believe me if I was actually trying to stop Grand Prince Neungyang's revolt? If I say that I was happy and scared at the same time without knowing how you felt bout me when I stayed by your side, would you believe me?"

Wait... what's this suddenly?

"You will not believe anything... except for that I tried to take your throne."

What's Nokdu trying to say now?

"Did you truly try to take my throne?" he asked again.

"Have I hurt you? You trusted me and kept me by your side. But I hid my identity and plotted treason, did that hurt you?"

What the—suddenly something in Nokdu's words grated him so much! Did they... or did they not try to usurp his throne?

"Are you trying to look down on me again?"

The child started crying again... and for some reason, Nokdu's anguished voice started to pierce him in the heart.

"You had no idea... and trusted me like a fool. Do you hate yourself for that? Are you heartbroken by the sense of betrayal? Are you in pain?"

"Just like me, when you abandoned me? If so, I will give you the answer you want. Yes, I wanted to drag you down from your throne myself. I decided that I was going to kill you myself. Are you satisfied with my answer?"

"You will not believe anything that I say..."

With sudden clarity, everything started to come down on him. What had he done? How could he accuse Nokdu—his innocent, sweet child—of a crime so great? How could he—to hurt his own son so much? How could he hurt his own son... the same way his own predecessor had hurt him?

Immediately, King Gwanghae felt his strength being sapped completely out of his body as his legs grew weak. But just as he was about to collapse, Prince Neungyang had come forward to support him by his side. It was then that it became clear to him about the true culprit in this revolt!

What has he done!

Yet, if he acknowledged Nokdu's innocence here and punished the true culprit of this crime of revolting against them—what would stop him later should madness overcome him and lead him to want to kill Nokdu again?

Nokdu must leave this place forever and never return!

The moment the thought came to him, he knew what it was that he should do...

King Gwanghae gathered his strength again and stood up.

"The culprit has confessed to his crimes! Apprehend him right now!"

Immediately, Nokdu's allies started to form their lines and gathered to protect his son. And as he watched his son fled with their foster brother and lover, King Gwanghae lamented silently at the thought that this would be the last time he'd see Nokdu in front of him again.

Chapter Text

"Go on if you want me to die here! Then you may try to kill your own son for the second time!"

As he thought, the queen knew of Nokdu's true identity. Yet, instead of running away with her long-lost prince, his queen had chosen to stay and protect her son. Knowing that she could've lost her life in order to keep Nokdu safe.

So once again, he had caused his wife great grief due to his own actions...

"Your Majesty, did you call for me?"

He turned around towards Officer Baek before sighing so softly. 

"Prince Neungyang has already set out to find the traitors, so I wanted you to set out as well."

The man frowned. "Do you want me to aid the prince in locating Nokdu?"

King Gwanghae stared at the man wordlessly before saying just one word.

"No."

×××

[Prince Neungyang has called off the search. I had to wait a while before locating your son. Please come.]

Shortly after receiving Officer Baek's message on Nokdu, he immediately headed out in secret to meet the man. He ended up arriving at a small shack; a bit further from the village that was at the foot of the mountain. 

He found the man waiting for him in front of the shack.

"Your Majesty..." greeted the man as he nodded silently. 

"Is he inside?"

"Yes, along with the old man who was helping him escape. I had the old man restrained in another room at the back, and called a physician from the village nearby to come."

King Gwanghae gave him a concerned look. "Is he hurt?"

The officer just shrugged. "You might as well take a look at him yourself. I suppose it was why the young lady who was with him earlier decided to give herself up in order to let him escape. "

×××

He walked into the room quietly, just as a middle-aged man finished cleaning up his tools. The man gave him a silent bow before turning towards his patient. 

"Luckily, the cut wasn't too deep, though the young man did lose a lot of blood. I noticed how there's a similar old scar on his body, but it doesn't look as if the wound is life-threatening." The man turned his face towards him before continuing. "I've done all I could to stop the bleeding. So now, whether the young man could live through this or not would depend on his own will to live."

"Good. Then I'll trust you to speak nothing of this to anyone, nor that you have ever seen me or the boy tonight."

"Yes... I shall do that," said the healer without question. 

"The man outside should be able to provide you with some compensation for your troubles..."

"No, you don't need to—"

The king turned to face the physician directly as the man could barely stop himself from gasping aloud.

"I insist... that you accept it. It's the least I could do to show you my gratitude." He turned towards his son before running his hand over Nokdu's face. "Thank you... for saving this child."

The physician nodded his head before silently walking out of the shed, leaving him alone with his son. King Gwanghae grabbed a stool nearby as he sat beside Nokdu. He gently took hold of Nokdu's hands before holding them tightly. 

Nokdu barely stirred from their sleep. But at least for now, his son was safe. When he heard from Officer Baek that Nokdu had sustained quite a grave injury, he couldn't help but assume the worst. Yet seeing his son alive now gave him an unexplainable feeling.

He thought about those distant nights when Nokdu used to accompany him by his side. When he was struck by illness, yet Nokdu's presence had given him his undeserved comfort. And he recalled those times when Nokdu had cried without any explanation to him. 

"How could I manage to have you as my son? I do not deserve to have you as my own; I failed you as a father. Yet how could you still want to protect me?"

He continued taking in the details of his precious son as he pondered about the moments he had denied himself in favour of some unjustified paranoia. He had robbed himself (and his queen) of the memories of seeing their prince grow up into a fine young man... to which he had no one but himself to blame.

"You're better off staying far away from the palace life. You have no need to carry the burden of the throne on your shoulders."

"Father..."

He held his breath without thinking as he looked up to see his son barely awake.

"...why didn't... you believe in me? I never wanted to... all I ever wanted was to be able to call you my father..."

The king ran his fingers over Nokdu's cheeks to brush away the tears that kept falling.

"It's not because of you. Everything that has happened.... was all my fault alone."

It was just a delirious murmuring, so he doubted that Nokdu was even aware that he was actually here by their side. Yet what he said to the boy was enough to coax his son back asleep. The King sighed.

If only it were possible for him to turn back time and act on certain things differently. If he did, what kind of a future could've unfolded before him? What kind of life would Nokdu have lived in then? What kind of father could he have become for his son? 

Alas, all of that musing would only remain as just fleeting dreams of what-ifs. Such illusions were something that he could no longer wish to have, for he had already lost the right to gain them. But it was different for Nokdu. His son could still receive their own happy endings and new beginnings.

All that's left for him to do is to let his son go.

×××

As he stepped out of the shed, Officer Baek dragged another old man from the other room to see him.

The King cast a brief glance towards the old man before looking away immediately. From the way the old man had tried to hide his surprise at seeing his face, it's clear that the old man knew his true identity. As well as his true relationship with Nokdu.

"If you still want to keep your head intact, make sure that none of this ever be found out by that child. Or else, I will not guarantee the safety of either you or that child you're protecting."

With that, the king started to walk away... as he abandoned his oldest son for the second time in his life.