Chapter Text
Hinata Shoyou added Yachi Hitoka, Kageyama Tobio, and 2 others
Hinata Shoyou renamed the chat to ‘COOL KIDS AND TSUKISHIMA’
Tsukishima Kei: I am leaving
Kageyama Tobio: Coward
Yamaguchi Tadashi: Hinata! Rename the chat to something nicer!
Hinata Shouyou: but its tru
Tsukishima Kei: The way you type will give my eyes cancer
Yachi Hitoka: you already have glasses, can it get worse?
Yachi Hitoka: oh no that sounds really mean!
Hinata Shouyou: PFFFT
Kageyama Tobio: Lol
Yamaguchi Tadashi: Tsukki’s eyesight isn’t that bad!
Yamaguchi Tadashi: But no yeah you did get roasted Tsukki
Tsukishima Kei: Shut up, Yamaguchi
Tsukishima Kei has left the chat
Yamaguchi Tadashi: Do I still say it?
Kageyama Tobio: Huh??
Yachi Hitoka: do it, do it-
Hinata Shouyou: no wait i can add him back
Hinata Shoyou has added Tsukishima Kei
Yamaguchi Tadashi: Sorry, Tsukki
Hinata Shouyou: k now leave
Tsukishima Kei: You seriously had to add me back just so Yamaguchi could say that?
Yamaguchi Tadashi: No!
Yamaguchi Tadashi: Please stay!
Tsukishima Kei: ….
Tsukishima Kei: Fine
Yachi Hitoka: it’s that easy?
Hinata Shouyou: ur a simp
Kageyama Tobio: Dont you simp for the little giant?
Yamaguchi Tadashi: Don’t worry, Hinata, I have some aloe
Yachi Hitoka renamed Yamaguchi Tadashi to ‘aloe carrier’
aloe carrier: Next time you need aloe, you won’t be getting it
Kageyama Tobio: Dont give any to Tsukishima either
Tsukishima Kei: Why am I here if you guys are just going to act like children?
Hinata Shouyou: u kno im the oldest right
Tsukishima Kei renamed Hinata Shoyou to ‘iM tHe OlDeSt’
aloe carrier: Oh no! Hinata, do you need more aloe??
iM tHe OlDeSt: im gonna bring aloe to practice and stick it down ur throat tsukishima
Tsukishima Kei: Are you also bringing a ladder?
aloe carrier: Hinata, I only have so much aloe
Kageyama Tobio: Its ok
Kageyama Tobio: I can do it for him
Tsukishima Kei: Bring a ladder?
Yachi Hitoka: you guys need sum milk
Kageyama Tobio: I am ok with having some milk
aloe carrier: You seem like the type of person who drinks milk straight out of the carton
aloe carrier: No offense
Kageyama Tobio: ….
Kageyama Tobio: I do???
iM tHe OlDeSt: um tf
Tsukishima Kei: You don’t deserve rights, Kageyama
Yachi Hitoka: you don’t put like, chocolate sauce in it?
Yachi Hitoka: or at least sugar???
Yachi Hitoka: something????
Kageyama Tobio: If regular milk is out i take strawberry
aloe carrier: Oh, a valid opinion. I was getting a bit scared that your brain was made up of volleyball and idiocy, but I guess that’s just the majority of it
iM tHe OlDeSt: u rlly hate regular milk huh
Tsukishima Kei: How are you going to get aloe now, king?
Kageyama Tobio: I’ll get ointment.
Yachi Hitoka: you will?
Kageyama Tobio: Yeah i guess
Yachi Hitoka: every time?
Kageyama Tobio: Since i cant trust Yamaguchi maybe yeah
Yachi Hitoka: ok
Yachi Hitoka has renamed Kageyama Tobio to ‘ointment bearer’
iM tHe OlDeSt: whats that??
Tsukishima Kei: Ointment?
iM tHe OlDeSt: no the other thing
ointment bearer: Dumbass
iM tHe OlDeSt: k then what is it yamayama
Tsukishima Kei: It’s been four minutes
Tsukishima Kei: Don’t strain yourself, you know you need that braincell if you want to be a good setter
aloe carrier: Kageyama, do you want some-
ointment bearer: Shut up Tsukishima
Yachi Hitoka: did….
Yachi Hitoka: did you want me to tell you what it means?
iM tHe OlDeSt: pls tell me
ointment bearer: She didnt ask you
aloe carrier: This is a group chat, you’ll both get the answer either way
iM tHe OlDeSt: nuh uh i can pm her
ointment bearer: So can i!
iM tHe OlDeSt: yea but she likes me better
ointment bearer: Yeah but you’re a dumbass
iM tHe OlDeSt: yachi who do you like better???
aloe carrier: Hey, Kageyama, did you want some aloe? This isn’t going to burn, but I can’t give much
Tsukishima Kei: Don’t give it to him
Tsukishima Kei: Let it happen
Yachi Hitoka: i feel bad, please give it to him
ointment bearer: I dont want anything just please tell the meaning of one fucking word
ointment bearer: Its been 25 minutes
Tsukishima Kei: Just search it up, idiot
iM tHe OlDeSt: ok he can search it up but please tell me yachi
aloe carrier: Please PM Hinata and don’t tell Kageyama, that would be hilarious
ointment bearer: Im going to block three of you
Yachi Hitoka: thank you
ointment bearer: What are you talking about? Im blocking you too
aloe carrier: Yachi, I’m afraid that I’m your only source of healing
iM tHe OlDeSt: ok that sounds a bit weird
Tsukishima Kei: Shut up
iM tHe OlDeSt: simp
aloe carrier: Kageyama’s the simp, he literally is blocking everyone but Hinata
iM tHe OlDeSt: ur a simp too
aloe carrier: what how
ointment bearer: You both are simps for each other and its gross
iM tHe OlDeSt: im surprised there isnt more pda
Tsukishima Kei: I doubt you even know what PDA stands for
aloe carrier: I’m not giving aloe to Hinata anymore
iM tHe OlDeSt: it stands for public displays of allergies
iM tHe OlDeSt: im not stupid tsukishima
Yachi Hitoka: oh my god, tears are actually falling
iM tHe OlDeSt: im sorry!!! what did i do??
Tsukishima Kei: Please, no one say anything
ointment bearer: I dont get it
ointment bearer: What did he do
aloe carrier: Absolutely nothing
iM tHe OlDeSt: what is a bearer?!?!?
Private chat with Yamaguchi and Hinata
Yamaguchi: A bearer is the same thing as a carrier. To bear something is the same thing as carrying something.
Yamaguchi: Please go along with this
Hinata: what??
COOL KIDS AND TSUKISHIMA
aloe carrier: Okay, fine.
aloe carrier: Bearer is a person who is sexually attracted to ointment
Tsukishima Kei: Shut up, Yamaguchi
Tsukishima Kei: You weren’t supposed to tell him
aloe carrier: Sorry, Tsukki
Yachi Hitoka: i-
ointment bearer: Really?
iM tHe OlDeSt: i think its true
iM tHe OlDeSt: i searched it up
ointment bearer: Oh
ointment bearer: How do you change your name?
Tsukishima Kei: Go to the three dots by the chat name
ointment bearer is calling…
ointment bearer has ended the call
ointment bearer: I pressed the wrong thing
Tsukishima Kei: Yeah
Tsukishima Kei: I can see
aloe carrier: Pfft
Tsukishima Kei: Okay, press the three dots
Tsukishima Kei: Then press group details
ointment bearer: Okay….
aloe carrier: You should be able to see the chat name and everyone in it
ointment bearer: Yeah
Tsukishima Kei: Ok, then at the very top, there’s three or four options
Tsukishima Kei: If you press the second one, the keyboard will pop up and you can change your name
ointment bearer: Ok
ointment bearer has left the chat
Yachi Hitoka: yamaguchi, i can’t believe you were part of that
iM tHe OlDeSt: no wait i wanna add him back
iM tHe OlDeSt has added ointment bearer
ointment bearer: fuck you
Tsukishima Kei: Is that any way to treat your royal servants?
iM tHe OlDeSt has renamed Tsukishima Kei to ‘yama’s servant’
Yachi Hitoka: i know you mean kageyama but i thought you meant yamaguchi for a minute
yama’s servant: I would rather be Yamaguchi’s slave than be a paid servant for Kageyama
Yachi Hitoka: you kinda already are
ointment bearer: Im not giving ointment to you
aloe carrier: It’s okay, I can give you aloe, Tsukki
yama’s servant: Shut up, Yamaguchi
aloe carrier: Sorry Tsukki…
aloe carrier: As my servant, you should be more respectful. I will not shut up
iM tHe OlDeSt: oof hows it feel tsukishima
yama’s servant has renamed to ‘Tsukishima Kei’
iM tHe OlDeSt: boring
iM tHe OlDeSt: youre like a normal guy
Tsukishima Kei: I will strangle your small body and dump it into an ocean
aloe carrier: Woah there, he needs a trigger warning for that one
iM tHe OlDeSt: im not gonna ask
iM tHe OlDeSt: i gotta go watch my sister
iM tHe OlDeSt: bye bye
ointment bearer: I have to go too
Tsukishima Kei: Thank God
aloe carrier: lol
aloe carrier: Tsukki, wanna go to the park?
Tsukishima Kei: Ok
Tsukishima Kei: We can meet up at the convenience store and get a snack
aloe carrier: Ok!
Yachi Hitoka: well, bye then
Yachi Hitoka: leave me to rot alone
aloe carrier: ….Did you want to come with us?
Yachi Hitoka: no, i’ll feel awkward when the sexual tension rises
Tsukishima Kei: I’m already on my way, Yamaguchi
aloe carrier: Ok, Tsukki!!
Yachi Hitoka: ok, bye!