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“Namjoon?” Seokjin called from the bedroom’s door, the happy screams coming from the boys and the loud laugh from their grandmother making it impossible for him to hear any response coming from inside. “Are you okay? Yoongi told me they’re almost here.” Silence. “Joonie?” Seokjin opened the door, his eyes widening at the sight in front of him. “Wh--what are you doing?”
Namjoon was in front of the mirror, hair disheveled and a loose tie around his neck.
No, three different ties around his neck.
“What’s going on?” Seokjin tried to hide his giggle, he really did, but his editor looked like a cheap version of Magic Mike with his shirt open and jeans unbuttoned. “What’s all this? It seems as if a tornado visited you and took every single garment out of your closet.” He said, walking through the mess Namjoon’s bedroom had become.
“I--I don’t know what to wear,” Namjoon finally said, his hand going to comb his hair once again in a nervous manner.
Seokjin stopped the motion, taking on his account to make his hair look presentable instead. “Everything looks perfect on you. Besides, it’s not like we’re going to have a visit from the Queen.” He paused. “Well, Yoongi is a different kind of queen, but you know what I mean.”
Namjoon chuckled, happily sighing at the feeling of his boyfriend’s hand carefully placing every single strand on its place. “I’m not nervous, just...a little restless.”
Seokjin frowned, eyes meeting for a second before he turned his attention to the unbuttoned shirt. “How so?”
“I haven’t been the best brother lately.” The actor was about to protest but he stopped him with a small kiss on the lips, shushing him. “I know what you’re going to say, and I know I’ve already talked to him and he said everything was okay, but I missed him. In many ways, and the fact that I only realized how important he’s on my life once he wasn’t here anymore to clean my mess…”
“Joonie, that’s not what happened and you know it.”
“I had so many things in my mind---”
“Exactly! Raising two little boys is not an easy task.”
“I only managed to do it because he was here with me.”
Seokjin grabbed Namjoon’s face between his hands, connecting his forehead to his. “I don’t know Hoseok but I know taking care of his family wasn’t a burden or a responsibility. It was an act of pure love. And you, my lovely and stubborn Joonie, are part of that family who he loves so much.” He said before pecking him on the lips, then resuming his work. Buttoning his shirt in silence and choosing a tie that didn’t make his eyes hurt. “Now, tonight is not a moment to think about past mistakes but to welcome new beginnings. Only happy tears, okay?”
“Love Really minute fifty five, my mother’s favorite. You trick nobody, darling” The editor said with a teasing tone, then yelping when Seokjin pinched him on the side.
“And I delivered those lines flawlessly, so shut that sweet ass of yours, Kim Namjoon, and stop whining because I hear your brother’s voice.”
“Not as sweet as yours.” Namjoon raised his eyebrows suggestively, earning another pinch but this time with a beautiful blush adorning the actor’s cheeks.
“You better save that for the bedroom. And yes,” he continued when he saw the editor prepared to reply, “I know we’re in the bedroom but that’s not what I’m talking about so shut it.”
Namjoon chuckled, nonchalantly placing his hands on the actor’s hips while he was focused on arranging his tie.
It was a custom of theirs to share a quiet moment while preparing themselves for the day (or night in this case), helping each other with a small task that the other could definitely do on his own. Seokjin enjoyed those moments because, as much as he loved his TaeTae and Kookie, he also loved having his editor all to himself. “There,” he said with a proud smile, “now you’re prepared to be the second most handsome man in the room.”
Namjoon laughed. “I think I know who owns the title.” He tightened his hold, leaving no space between them.
“Mmm.” Jin bit his bottom lip, eyes roaming over Namjoon’s face, hands placed over his brawny chest. “Maybe you look too good for your own good. Maybe we should stay here for the rest of the night.”
Namjoon beamed, his beautiful dimples in full display. “What would the others have to say about that?”
The actor shrugged. “They would understand.”
“Alright then, you tell Tae that we’re not going to see the fireworks with him, I’ll wait right here.”
“You monster,” gasped Seokjin.
“I just know your weak point, darling.”
“Just like I know yours.” He licked Namjoon’s lips without any warning, making sure to lightly bite his lip before breaking contact.
“Jin.” Namjoon said, mouth seeking him with desperation.
“Uh-uh,” Seokjin stopped him with a finger against his lips, moving his head back. “They’re waiting for us, Kim Namjoon.”
“Let them wait.”
Seokjin gasped at the feeling of those hands grasping his ass, the sudden urge of giving in and losing himself in Namjoon’s touch for the rest of the evening clouding his mind for a second.
“HobiHobiHobi! ”
Both men broke apart at Jungkook’s squeals, a reflex action at the baby’s voice.
“We should go.”
“Yeah.”
“But this doesn’t end here,” Namjoon’s gaze made him shiver in anticipation.
“I’ll hold you to that,” Seokjin lightly pecked him on the lips because how could he resist?
They were almost outside the bedroom when he took Namjoon’s hand to stop him. “I need a favor to ask.”
“Anything, darling.”
“Don’t be too hard on Yoongi. I know that’s your brother we’re talking about but he’s my friend, more family than friend actually, and I want you to take your time to know him before making any assumptions.”
Namjoon frowned. “I wasn’t--” he started to say but then sighed when he saw Seokjin’s raised eyebrows. “Alright, I was but you need to understand that it may be your best friend but he’s still a stranger to me, darling. And my brother means the world to me. I don’t want to fail him again.”
“And I totally get it. But this is Yoongi, not Jimin. You need to have a little faith, babe. Not only in him but also in your brother.”
Namjoon looked down at their hands, caressing the soft palm with his thumb. He took a deep breath. “At least let me give him the hurt my brother and I’ll hurt you speech, please.” He pouted at him, prompting a chuckle.
“Oh, I’m not that mean. Go tell him baby, I’ll hold your flower.”
“Namjoon, hun, I love you but if you break another one of my tupperwares I’ll disown you in an instant.”
Namjoon immediately stopped yanking the stubborn lid that he had been fighting against for the last five minutes. “Sorry, eomma.”
“Here, let me.” Yoongi calmly appeared beside him, taking the offending thing from him.
“It’s just really--”
Prroc .
Namjoon gaped at the lid now lying on the counter, as if mocking him from his complete stillness. “H--how?”
“Oh, finally! Thank you, hun.” Seungki kissed her son on the cheek, then turned away to continue with her task on the stove.
“It wasn’t--”
Yoongi half smiled. “Seungki…” said him shyly. “May I help with anything?” he asked eloquently.
“Of course not, dear.” She said, quite scandalized. “You’re a guest here and guests don’t have to move a finger. Isn’t it, Tae?” She asked the little boy currently absorbed in his task of not spilling any soy sauce all over the counter.
Tae moved his head up and down in agreement. “ Grest don’t work cause they’re away from home and we has to help them feel at home.”
Yoongi grabbed his chest over his heart. “I can feel my grinch heart changing sizes.”
Namjoon chuckled, always amused when his sons managed to steal someone’s heart by only breathing. “Taehyung remembers almost every saying my mother says and takes it as if it came from the Bible itself.” He looked at his son, his brows furrowed in concentration while listening to his grandmother’s instructions. “You’ll get used to it in time. But, yes, it’s quite adorable”
Yoongi turned to look at Namjoon with puppy eyes after he said “You’ll get used to it.” eyes gleaming with hope. “I can assure you I will not. He’s too adorable to get used to it.” he coughed. “So, Namjoon. You’re an editor too.” he entered a new conversation, sounding a bit uncertain on how to follow it up.
“Yes, my eomma was one too. We’re an editorial family, if you may.” He said in a teasing tone, prompting a chuckle from the polished man, white hair clashing with his monochromatic outfit. His brother had good taste. A family trait apparently. “Seokjin tells me you’re a producer. Interesting.”
“Yes, I am. But mine is a noodle making family--weirdly enough, I can't for the life of me prepare a good soup.” he joked.
“Well, I can’t open a tupperware on my own so we’re not so different after all.”
Yoongi chuckled. “They key it’s on the wrist.” he began twisting his arm around to show him. “I can show you later. Over tea party and hats.” he twisted the corner of his mouth upwards teasingly.
“I see my fame precedes me. I’ll have you know, I make the best imaginary tea in London. Just you wait.”
“I’ll hold you to it.” he pointed with his finger and winked.
Namjoon snorted, choosing not to go down that road and watch at his son instead, looking so professional with his new child size apron (Santa’s gift) that said Kith the cook in bold letters. “You know,” he said after a while in amenable silence, “you’re the first suitor my brother brought home.” -
Yoongi gulped visibly. “Huh, how ‘bout that…” he stammered, looking self-conscious. -
“He’s a private person, too private sometimes for my liking, but it comes from a good place. You see, my brother always puts everyone else first. Especially his family.” He sighed. “I understand you know about Park Jimin?”-
Yoongi’s eyes conveyed seriousness, he was extra focused on what he was about to say after hearing that name. “Yes,” he clenched his jaw. “I’ve heard of…” he stopped himself, looked over to where Tae was, then back at him. “That fella.”
“Daddy! Look!” Namjoon smiled at his son, who was happily showing him how he put the sauce into the pot his grandmother had been working on.
“Good job!” Namjoon clapped. “Be careful, alright?”
Seungki rolled her eyes at him. “Not like your father,” she yelled-whispered.
“Oi !”
“Daddy burned a pan, grandma!”
“The audacity.” The editor said to himself, prompting a chuckle from Yoongi. He faced the producer, making a motion towards the kitchen door with his head. “Sorry, I didn’t want their attentive ears to hear anything.” -
“I get it,” he replied. “I’m not Jimin, Namjoon.” he let out, crossing his arms over his chest. -
“Seokjin said the same and I trust his judgement. But, either way, I don’t know you, Yoongi. I heard good things about you, that’s fair, but I can’t let my guard down. Not for now. My brother is one of the most important people in my life and I failed him once. I won’t make the same mistake again.”-
“You didn’t fail him,Namjoon.” he said with mourning eyes. “I can assure you Hoseok would never see it that way.” he claimed. “It’s so sad seeing how such a nephastus man could do this to two good men.” he regretted. -
Namjoon shook his head. “My brother is too kind, one of the reasons why that man managed to take advantage of him, but also perceptive. If you’re here is because he saw something in you, something that I hope I’ll see in the future. That is if you’re deciding to stay.” He sent him a meaningful look, almost as if he was testing him.
“As long as your brother has me,” he said wholeheartedly. “I only want to prove to your brother how much he deserves to be loved, and I hope I can be one to show him that.” he remarked, his poise was stern. “Hope that, with time, you can trust in me.” he finished.-
Namjoon appraised him for a few seconds. Frankly he admired the man’s courage, it was obvious he wasn’t there to be compliant, which he really appreciated. But also it made him feel a little protective over Hoseok. Park Jimin also had a strong personality that somehow managed to overshadow his brother in various ways and areas of his life. His work, love life, friendships. Every single space had been overtaken by his presence, leaving Hoseok more isolated than ever.
Was Yoongi the same?
Seokjin had been very clear about his good intentions. But still, Min Yoongi was on thin ice until further notice.
“I really do hope so, Yoongi.” He took a step closer, managing to slightly hover over him. “Only one thing I want to add.”
Yoongi didn’t move an inch, his eyes fixed on Namjoon’s not threatening, but attentive. Telling he was truly listening to his boyfriend’s brother.
“I’m against violence but if my family is in the picture I won’t hesitate.”
“Isn't that from a Liam Neeson Film?”
Namjoon blinked. “I-I don’t think so? Which--?” He shook his head. “ Anyways ,” he continued, “don’t hurt my brother. You understand?”
Yoongi nodded, certainty painting his next words. “I won’t.”
“And don’t let him know we had this conversation or I won’t hear the end of it.”
“It’s between us.” he agreed.
Namjoon sighed and stepped back, leaving Yoongi’s personal space. “Thank you. Sorry to be so hard on you but...you know.”
“That was you being hard on me?” he psst, letting out a taunting snort. “You’re like a giant puppy.” the significantly smaller man said, tilting his head to the side.
Namjoon gasped. “Being disrespected in my own house and how old are you?”
“I’m from ‘93 and I think your brother and you are from…’94, I guess? So, yeah, I’m your hyung. You should show me some respect.” The producer dared to puff his chest, a satisfied smile gracing his oddly delicate features.
“Always weespect your hyungs, Daddy!” Tae shouted from the stove.
Namjoon gaped at the man, his mother’s laughter resounding in the background. “I can’t believe that, after so many years, there are new adult additions to the family and still I’m the youngest.”
Yoongi shrugged. “Sucks to be you.”
Namjoon cleared his throat, looking at his luckily now occupied son. “We’ll have to do something about that potty mouth of yours. My children are like parrots sometimes.”
Yoongi widened his eyes, uncrossing his arms. “I’m sorry.”
Namjoon had to laugh. This man, this famous producer who liked to spat profanities to every person who wrong him, hadn’t even blinked an eye at Namjoon’s threat of hurting him if he did something to his brother; but the moment a four year old entered into the picture he suddenly became an example of decorum.
“As I said, you’ll get used to it.” He patted his shoulder on his way to the fridge, wanting to at least help with a few snacks while the dinner was cooking. “Oh,” he spun around, “another thing, hyung .”
“Mmm?”
“Seokjin asked me to tell you that these pecs are not only for decoration.” And with a last triumphal wink, he left a dumbfounded Yoongi behind.
“Are you going to help him?”
“Nah, let him suffer for a little longer.”
“I can almost see him trying to hold his tears back.”
“It’s an optical illusion.”
Namjoon chuckled in his ear, gently nuzzling his nose against his nape. “You’re devilish, darling.”
Jin shrugged, contentedly making himself comfortable against the firm chest behind him. Frankly, who needed pillows when Namjoon was near? “He’s the one who offered to help.”
“Still.”
“And I don’t see you moving to assist him.”
“I was going to, but someone imprisoned me, demanding the last cuddles of the year.”
“Awww.” Jin mocked him, turning his head so he could see his pout. “Did I interrupt your moment of chivalry with my insensitive demands? You could have said no, you know?”
Namjoon looked down at his puckered lips with rapt attention. “You know I could never say no to that face.”
Jin’s heart skipped a beat. That man surely was a sweet talker. “Is my beauty the only reason you like me so much?” He said, slowly breaching the minimum space between them. “Or maybe something else,” he murmured, noses barely touching.
“We both know there are an enormous list of reasons, darling.” Jin could feel Namjoon’s mouth lightly touching his lips with every muttered word. “And it goes longer and longer with every passing day.”
“It goes both ways.”
Namjoon beamed, hugging him even tighter. “It does?”
Jin nodded. “It really does.” He said before he finally breached the last centimeters between their mouths. God that man was a menace. A true menace.
Everytime he was near him it was like nothing else existed. His mind filled with deep dimples, tan skin and NamjoonNamjoonNamjoon.
“Namjoon!”
They gasped, detaching themselves so quickly that Jin almost fell down from the couch but was saved by Namjoon’s arms around him.
“I’ve been calling you for a while.” A very scandalized (but clearly amused) Hoseok looked at them with both hands on his hips. He could have passed as angry if it wasn't for how hard he was trying to fight a smile.
Namjoon cleared his throat. “I--um--I’m sorry.” He said, apologetic. "I was speaking to Jin."
Hoseok raised an eyebrow. “And I guess cuddling on the sofa is mandatory if you want to speak to someone."
"Uh...Yes?"
Hoseok sighed, shaking his head. "And here I thought you left dish duty to help Yoongi.”
"I was--" Namjoon began excusing himself but stopped mid sentence when his brother squinted suspiciously at him. The editor sighed. "I'm sorry. I got distracted."
Hoseok straightened his back with a pleased smile on his face. "You're in charge of the breakfast tomorrow. And," he added before Namjoon could argue, "eomma needs some groceries."
Namjoon straightened, making Jin almost fall off the sofa. A gain. " Groceries? My refrigerator has been begging for some rest since she arrived. There's no more space!"
"Oh please tell her that. And you'll end with a new and bigger one like last year."
Namjoon dramatically let himself fall into the sofa with a huff. "I love your mother," Jin giggled.
"Just you wait, darling, just-you-wait."
Hoseok chuckled under his breath, clearly enjoying having the upper hand in the discussion, but then his attention shifted to the other side of the room from where a happy snicker came from. Jin saw how his smile turned soft at the image of Yoongi and the boys on the other sofa and couldn't contain himself from cooing a little bit.
The producer was seated in the middle with his phone positioned so both boys could watch the screen, an excited Tae laughing at something, boxy smile on full mast. He was making faces at the device, then giggling even harder at what he was seeing.
Seokjin had to admit that he was proud of his friend. He knew how nervous he had been about meeting the family of the man who had become an important part of his life in such little time. Even after all the reassuring messages he had sent him, talking about how calm the boys were and how cool Seungki was, his friend still freaked out. His mind running everywhere since the moment the eldest Jung had expressed the desire of him meeting them all.
He kinda almost died of secondhand embarrassment the day they had a video call when the rapper made the Christmas shopping. Imagining Yoongi in a toy store surrounded by overexcited children was one thing, seeing it was not so funny.
"At least they're having a good time," Hoseok said.
"Of course! Kids love Yoongi."
Hoseok looked at him, surprised. "I would've never imagined."
Because it was a blatant lie. But, hey, everything to make his friend look good in front of his future husband and another reason why Seokjin should be the Best Man. "It's because of the height. They feel more relaxed when they speak with someone of their size."
"I can listen to you from here, Seokjin." Yoongi said with a gruff voice. "And I don't find you funny."
"I don't know what you mean. I'm hilarious."
"Uncle Hobi!"
Tae left the sofa, taking the man's hand and bringing him to Yoongi's side. " Shoonky has a aplicashon that plays with your face. Look!"
"I see you took my advice," Jin said to the producer with a cocky grin, "and you said it was a dumb idea."
Yoongi looked down, the apple of his cheeks lightly turning red. "I didn't say that."
Seokjin decided to stop teasing him when he saw the heart eyes he directed at Hoseok who was making kissing faces at the camera, probably trying one of the many filters Yoongi downloaded just for that occasion. The actor had to contain a squeal when Yoongi, apparently losing his inner battle, planted a soft kiss on his boyfriend's lips, causing Tae's shriek.
"Ewww, Shoonk y! You need to ask for permisson !"
"He has my permission, TaeTae." Said a starry eyed Hoseok. "Always."
"Ugh, get a room."
If looks could kill, Jin would have died under Yoongi's glare. "Says the man currently on his boyfriend's lap."
Jin shrugged. "Have you seen these thighs?" He said, hand caressing a very mortified Namjoon's quadriceps. "The comfiest place."
Yoongi looked at him with a defiant glint. "Have you seen Hoseok's? They can go for ho--"
"Are you having fun, Kookie?" Hoseok suddenly said, cheeks aflame, but managing to take their attention from him and turn their heads to the too quiet baby. "Are you sleepy?"
Jungkook shook his head, his eyes still on the phone screen. He looked tense, leaving a considerable distance between Yoongi and him but still being a silent participant of the activity proposed by the man. Frankly it wasn't a shocking attitude from the baby, taking on account how he was with strangers. His brother was similar but still more outgoing with new people when he was in a familiar place, usually taking the reins of the conversation while the younger liked to watch and decide if he could trust them.
"Maybe if he takes a quick nap?" Seokjin said to Namjoon, who maneuvered to take his phone from his back pocket while still lying down and with Jin over him.
"It's half an hour before midnight," Yoongi said.
The editor sent him a grateful smile. "I think it is too late now. And he would hate to miss the fireworks."
"You wanna try some by yourself?" Yoongi carefully offered the phone to him.
"Go on, Kookie." Hoseok encouraged him when the boy didn't move. "We play with the phone all the time."
Jungkook looked from under his eyelashes at Yoongi, who gave him a reassuring nod, placing the phone even closer to his hands. Cautiously, Jungkook took the device, his already big eyes widening when he saw himself on the screen. Really, if Yoongi wasn't in love with the kids already, the tiny squeal Jungkook emitted was the last straw.
"I think we lost him." Namjoon murmured.
"I agree." Jin said, his gaze not on the bashful producer but on the other man adoringly looking at him.
"Namjoon," Seungki called from the kitchen, "could you help me with the champagne and the snacks? It's almost time!"
"Yes, eomma !" Said Namjoon while fighting against a pouty Jin who didn't want his favorite pillow to leave. A light peck on the lips finally convinced him to stand up.
Yoongi looked at Hoseok with a slack jaw. "Snacks? Even more food ?"
"You'll get used to it." Hoseok kissed his cheek, taking an excited Tae from his lap and placing him on the cushion. "I'll be right back," he said as he went to the hallway.
Yoongi and Jin exchanged a confused look, the latter following Hoseok and finding him with his coat already on.
"Everything okay?"
"Oh yes," Hoseok moved his hand in a dismissive way, "just a little of fresh air."
"It's freezing out there." The actor hugged himself when Hoseok opened the door and a cold breeze entered.
Hoseok laughed. “Don’t worry, I’m used to it.” And then he was out.
“Where’s he?” Yoongi questioned him the moment he returned to the living room.
“I think he’s...sitting on the porch?”
“ What ? It’s freezing.”
“That’s what I told him!”
The producer opened his mouth to retort when Jungkook jumped excitedly on his seat, moving the phone towards his brother.
“A cat, Kookie!” Tae giggled. “Like Ssoy ’s and Auntie Irene! Look, Shoonky! ” The boy returned the phone to its owner, who looked down at the screen. That’s when Jungkook started squealing like crazy, pointing at the device.
“ Meow Meow! Meow Meow! ” The baby screamed, clapping his chubby hands.
“ Shoonky looks funny.” Tae hid his smile against his hand.
“He kinda looks like a cat already.” Jin wickedly smiled at his friend.
Jungkook suddenly stopped clapping, his little mouth forming an “o”. He then turned towards the producer, pointing at him, and, for the first time that evening, he graced him with his toothy grin. “ Meowngi! ” He said to the top of his tiny lungs. “ Meowngi! ”
The next time Namjoon entered into the room, holding a tray full of snacks and a bottle of non alcoholic champagne under his arm, he was met with a scandalized Yoongi being hugged by two little kids screaming a strange version of his name and a red faced Jin hugging his midsection in pain of how hard he was laughing.
“Happy New Year!” Tae screamed in front of the TV, being surprisingly louder than the host currently presenting from the London Eye. “Happy New Year, Kookie!” He then yelled at his brother before engulfing him in a tight hug, the baby giggling like crazy.
“Tae, don’t suffocate your brother, please.” Seungki said from the couch, looking too comfortable with her glass of champagne and the blanket over her lap for her to get up to stop her grandson from choking the younger one of the family.
“Grandma, clinkclink !” Kookie ran towards her with his sippy cup on hand and bunny teeth on full display.
“Up, Grandma! It’s Jeezus birthday!”
“That’s not--”
“Let him be.” Seokjin chuckled into Namjoon’s neck, their congratulatory hug turning into a full cuddling session by now.
Not like he was complaining.
Namjoon sighed, gently nuzzling his nose against Seokjin’s temple. “This year I’ll teach them more common knowledge.”
“And I’ll try not to tease you when Tae starts making too many questions and making you lose your cool composure.”
Namjoon slightly pulled away so they could be face to face. “Be careful, darling. In no time I’ll play the ask Jin card and you’ll regret your words.”
“I guess I’ll have to stay around to see if that’s true or not.” Seokjin said teasingly, brushing their noses fleetingly .
“You can stay as long as you want.” Namjoon said before closing the gap between them to gently kiss him.
“Happy New Year, Joonie.”
“Happy New Year, darling.”
“ ‘Appy you eear !”
Both men laughed, looking down at the cheerful two year old with his little arms around their legs.
“Happy New Year, Kookie-yah.” Seokjin took the baby into his arms so he could blow a raspberry on his tummy, eliciting happy squeals from him.
“Daddy! Jin-Sir! Happy New Year!” Tae left his Grandma’s lap, running towards them so his father could scoop him up as well. “Love you!”
“Love you too, baby.” Both men and child looked so content exchanging kisses that Seokjin had to coo at them.
“Are we late for the cuddling session?” Said a voice from the door, making both kids perk up at the sound and then squirm to be let down.
“Uncle Hobi! Happy New Year!”
“ ‘Appy you eear !” Jungkook wobbled over as fast as he could on his small legs towards Hoseok who was crouched with both arms wide open and cackling with that characteristic laugh of his. He almost fell backwards when both boys reached him but luckily Yoongi was there to catch him on time, tenderly smiling at the scene in front of him.
Namjoon hugged Seokjin from behind, placing his chin on his shoulder. “I guess we have a new potential nanny.” He said with his eyes trained on a very flustered Yoongi holding Tae’s hands and jumping in circles with him.
“No, we definitely have a new one.” He chuckled at Hoseok’s enamored expression once Jungkook joined the bouncing party. “I see many date nights in our future.”
“I can’t wait.”
Seokjin closed his eyes, melting into his favorite editor’s touch. “Frankly, me neither.”