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Chapter Text

The first thing she noticed when she opened her eyes was that she was wearing black skinny jeans, red boots, and her ‘no smoking’ t-shirt, which was quite unusual in that her shirt had disintegrated hundreds of years ago, having succumbed to the ravages of time, she hadn't worn jeans in almost as long, and one of her red boots was last seen being swallowed by a kraken. The second thing she noticed was that wherever she was it was bright and green, the Sky Ball of Death hanging overhead. Yet she was not burning to True Death, which was even more unusual in that she was a vampire. Instinctively she reached for her neck but no, her amulet was gone, which made for the third consecutive unusual thing, for the source of her demonic power was the one thing that protected her against her vampiric weaknesses.

‘Where am I?,” she thought, dizzy from her… what? Journey? Transition? What happened? But as she looked around she realized she was in Ooo, Ooo as it was hundreds of years ago, before she lost the last remaining shreds of her sanity, before she set aside Who She Was in favor of Who She Had to Become. Before her Happiness was robbed from her, violently and abruptly. Because she failed. Because-

“DUDE!” A voice rang, a familiar voice, elated. When had she last heard that voice? Four hundred years? Six hundred? She wasn’t sure, for time was an illusion, especially after her world had come crashing down, before- “You made it! Finally man, we were going stir-nuts-butts without you!”

And then a second voice joined the first, equally familiar, equally stupefying. “Woah. Someone’s gotta get her like… on the crazy-butt-train double!”

“On it, man!”

As she watched him run off one question made its way numbly to the surface of her mind, muted by its impossibility. Hope was a dangerous thing, and though she had no heart left to break something stirred in her chest. ‘…Finn? Jake?’ No, that was impossible. Like all mere mortals they had died hundreds of years ago, Jake from his natural lifespan, Finn in the glory of saving an innocent soul; it had been tragic, but he would have had it no other way. That Finn was a distant memory, because wherever they were he was a young man now, biologically older than herself but no less recognizable. It was Finn, in his prime, the same bear hat, the same mechanical arm, the same sword. The same Finn.

Jake hadn’t changed either, muzzle brown instead of the grey she had grown accustomed to. His paws were clasped in some anticipation she didn't understand and his tail was wagging excitedly, not listlessly in its old age like just before he-

“Marcy?”

The vampire - or was she a demon now? - froze. Her blood, long dead, chillded and the breath she took in the memory of her Happiness, caught in her throat. ‘No. No no no no.’ That voice. She’d know that voice anywhere, though it seemed out of breath and strangely elated. Slowly, fearfully, she looked over her shoulder at its owner. At what she saw her voice cracked. She began to shake, trembling as she stood. She didn't care about the indignity. All she cared about was- “…Bonnie..?”  It was a watery, strangled whisper. It was all she dared, because as impossible as it was there she was, the love of her apparently not endless life, her wife and queen. The candy golem was18 again (at least, biologically speaking), piercing green eyes bright and just as watery as her own. Her smile was wide, almost triumphant, and beaming with what Marceline could only call pride. But it was her outfit that made her recoil, because Bonnibel was dressed in the letterman jacket that had once belonged to the vampire and a violet skirt with matching shoes, the outfit she had worn when she-

The memory violently erupted to the surface of her mind, and she warred mentally, compelled to run towards her wife even as she was desperate to run from the impossible, from what could not possibly be true, what could only be a cruel lie. 'Yes, that's it,' Marceline thought numbly. iI was a lie it had to be a lie this had to be her punishment for her sins-

She fell to her knees just as the candy scientist reached her. She was scooped up into the most perfect embrace in any reality - and she would know - and the rest of the world fell away. 'No,' Marceline mutely corrected herself, because her world was right there, so warm and soft and gentle and exactly how the musician remembered it, even hundreds of years later.There were tears in Bonnibel's eyes as well, but though her’s didn’t escape the musician’s did until she was sobbing, silently and effortlessly. She could only whisper three words through the tsunami of emotion: “…I don’t understand..” 

As she trembled the younger woman guided her to rest on the soft ground, letting the vampire's head rest against her chest, pointed ear over a very much beating heart. It was beating faster than normal, that was inarguable, but it was beating all the same for the first time in hundreds of years. It was impossible, it was a mistake, but Marceline would know that heartbeat anywhere. Somewhere, someone mumbled a gentle, “I’ll go get the party goin’ Queebo. See ya guys there.” That only cemented her dizziness. And then its owner was gone, and the older woman found herself relieved for some unknown reason.

“You’re in Dead World, Marcy. The 49th level to be precise,” her favorite voice in any and all universes soothed. “I’ve been waiting for so long, but you’re here now. You’re finally with me. I’ve missed you so very much.” The embrace tightened as the singer's trembling turned into a humiliating shake.

“I don’t understand,” she whispered again. And she didn’t. Dead World? Bonnie had been waiting? None of this made any sense at all.

“That’s alright. It's typical not to come to terms with your own death when you first arrive. It takes time for your soul to adjust,” she murmured, clinging to the vampire.

“My soul…?” The demon shook her head. Now she knew for sure that this was either a mistake of an elaborate, cruel joke. Knowing Death, it was probably the latter. “I… I can’t be in Dead World, Bonnie. I’m not allowed, remember? I traded Death my eternal torture for your soul to go there. Deal's a deal, even for me.” She paused. "Especially for me," she mumbled.

“Yes, you did,” the voice agreed, a tone of know-it-allism creeping in. “As expected of Lady Evil, your contract expertly assured my soul would reside here, not only in Dead World but the highest level possible. You were willing to sacrifice everything for me. But you see, Marcy… there was one loophole I don’t think even you anticipated.” Her face was cupped now, tearful garnet eyes forcibly turned to meet elated green. “In marrying under demon custom our souls became half of one another, which means that until this very moment my soul, Dead World residence or not, was incomplete. When you died, per your contract, the rest of my soul returned to me."

"...Me?" The question was so loaded Marceline almost choked on it.

"You," she agreed. She was positively beaming now. "We have a soulbond. That trumps your secondary contract. Death wasn’t exactly pleased with that development but Life was, and she convinced him to acquiesce. In retribution he lowered not only my soul but the rest of us to level 49 rather than 50, but that’s such a small price to pay to hold you in my arms. For you to come home.”

The demon blinked slowly, tears beginning to trickle into thin streams as a knowing hand rubbed calming circles on her back.“…I don’t understand..,” she whispered once more. “…Others..?”

“Oh yes,” Bonnibel nodded. “The others were unwilling to spend eternity without you. Obvs Finn and Jake are here, as well as Phoebe, Simon, Lady… everyone save for Penelope of course.” Now there was a new smile all together, this one kind and sweet. “Do you remember that much yet? Our daughter?” There was hope in her voice. Not exactly expectation, but more akin to encouragement, and the vampire tried her hardest to remember-

“Oh…” Marceline meant for that to sound much more excited than it actually did, but the shaking was invading her voice now. “She’s…” Her eyes closed tightly, the effort to remember her only focus now. Well, that and the warm hand rubbing her back. Her thoughts seemed intact but her memories were a jumble of people and faces and names and places, hundreds and hundreds of years' worth. Then it slammed into her, all at once, so much so that the vertigo almost toppled her, if not for the ready embrace. Bonnibel had been expecting that, but then she had always been a brainlord. Marceline's brainlord. The onyx-haired woman smiled weakly, mind far away. “She… she’s so much like you, Bon. She never stopped asking ‘why?’ Believes in magic though, she even built on all your research. Glob it was like watching a mini-you so much it hurt. She's so curious. She got my rashness and my temper but she got the best of you.” Another memory, this one bittersweet, emerged through the ether. “You’re a grandmother now.” The tears had begun to fall again, and that same warm hand wiped them away without further acknowledgement. "She stayed in the Candy Kingdom to watch over the candy peeps. Formed her own soulbond with Raak. Married them." Now her laugh was bitter for a very different reason, the laughter of a mother forced to watch her daughter grow into her own person, autonomous from her mothers, making her own decisions whether or not the woman who raised her agreed. Yes, rash and impulsive, just like Marceline, but it had worked out, even the demon could begrudgingly admit that.

"Grandchildren?" There was joy there, joy and pride and love and so much sentiment that Marceline's tears finally dried up.

“Two of ‘em,” she continued. “A boy and a girl. Uther is following in his mother’s footsteps, totes in love with what you created and what she…,” her head shook, but she couldn’t help the quirk in her lips, the repressed smile. “He plans to take over the Candy Kingdom if Penny can't. His sister, though… Judith’s obsessed with the Nightosphere. Did you know my demonic genes were recessive? You would have loved studying her, she’s only part demon but you wouldn’t know it. She wanted to know everything about being a demon, kept following me around until I taught her what it meant to be in charge of the Nightosphere.” The vampire's eyes slid shut as she resisted being lost in some memory. “She was just… she’s so good at it, Bon. I tried to tell her ‘no’, tried to make sure she got that it was a gig that meant she was Deathless, but… you know? She said it was like being a guardian for both her brother and… she called herself my legacy. How could I say no? I wanted to, but… I think I was selfish. I think… I think I just wanted to die. I wanted an excuse to just… go find Death and get it over with. Penny thought you had some scheme that would reunite us. I hoped she was right, but I think I just...”

She hadn’t meant for all of that to come out all at once, but something about Bonnibel, about the way she stroked her hair and the soothing beat of her heart, had compelled her to spill all of her secrets. Now the crying returned, and as undignified as it was she found herself powerless to stop it. The candy golem traced her jaw, her neck, her back, emphasizing her touch, emphasizing their closeness. “Shh… it’s alright, Marcy. Let it out. This is part of the adjustment process.” And now the big question, the one the younger woman knew would hurt the most, but was the most necessary of all. “Do you remember how you died?,” she gently prodded.

Oh yes, that memory was clear. Marceline's cheeks flushed in shame and she began to pull away, no longer worthy of comfort, but Bonnibel was having none of it. She pulled her lover closer, her hand resting soothingly on the back of her neck. It was a subtle gesture of dominance, a comfort Marceline hadn’t felt in… what? Three hundred years? More? Her internal clock had been broken before, but accepting the amulet and all its responsibility had ensured that she would need to shatter it. “I… I went to your grave. I gave Judith the amulet, did all the paperwork to transfer control to her… then I went to your grave. Then… then I just waited for the sun.” She swallowed, hard. It was humiliating, all of it, but it was only a fraction of what she deserved. Her death was a betrayal of her promise to her queen, to live for her memory, not die for it. It was just the last of a long-line of betrayals and failures.’"I'm so sorry, Bonnie. I failed. I promised to protect you, I promised to keep you safe, it was all my fault-”

Bonnibel lifted her cheek, offering the most tender of kisses, effectively silencing the musician. “You did everything you could. You had to choose, and you chose to save Penny. IIn my last moments I knew you’d have to pick, and you picked exactly as you should have. It's the same choice I would have made, because between our daughter and myself there was one correct choice. I’m so proud of you, little bat." Her voice was drenched in sincerity, and somehow that only made the demon's guilt worse.

“It was my fault…,” she whimpered. “If I had just-”

“You’re here now,” the scientist interrupted, not unkindly. “I knew that one day you’d return to me, and here you are. I only needed to wait, and as you’re well aware I’m quite adept at waiting. We all believed in you, and even though we couldn’t watch over you directly we would ask every new arrival about you. They told us how you appointed yourself guardian of Ooo, of making sure you harshly punished those who deserved it while granting safe passage to Death for those who had earned it. We’re all so proud of you, Marcy. I may have passed on but you tried everything in your power not to succumb to despair, or the amulet’s malicious influence. I can’t imagine how horrible it must have been for you… but it’s over now. You’ve come home to us. One day I’m certain the rest of our family will join us because you raised them. Penny may have inherited my disposition but she also inherited your heart. Your love and your loyalty came so easily to her when she was growing up. I’m not surprised that she grew into a gentle and devoted soul with a loving family of her own.”

Somewhere along the way her mate’s speech had become unbearable because she deserved none of it. “No… no, it’s not true Bon-”

“It’s absolutely true.” There was a firmness in Bonnibel's voice now, not replacing the kindness but instead fusing to it. Just as she had learned to do before her death, once she came to accept that she had squishy heartguts emotions, just like everyone else. Just like the demon remembered. “This is natural, Marcy. Your half of the soul is purging all of your doubts and fears and pain. It hurts, but it’ll feel better soon. I went through exactly this.”

“…Why..?”

Bonnibel's smile grew sad, the tears returning to her eyes. They didn’t fall. “Because I left you alone. I broke my own promise, even if it was unavoidable. Soon, though, that guilt passed because I came to realize that you’d find your way back to me one day. All I had to do was wait. We all did, and if Finn and Jake’s reaction is going to be anything like the others’ I imagine they’re thrilled as well. Certainly not as much as I am, but thrilled all the same. We love you, Marceline. I love you. I never stopped.”

“…You were always the one for me,” Marceline whispered. “I thought about you every day, sometimes all day. I never stopped. I just… I wanted…” She trailed off, a new surge of guilt searing her part of the soul.

Evidently Bonnibel felt it as well, and she offered another gentle kiss. “Penny knows you love her, I’m quite sure of it.”

“She was just… she’s so like you it hurt, Bon-”

“And she knew her mother loved her. Both of her mothers.” 

What could she say to that? The singer fell silent as the candy golem rubbed her back. “Why is everyone…? I don’t know. Like this? You know... like... younger and junk?"

Bonnibel laughed softly at the bewilderment in her lover's voice. Somehow, her wife was following the exact same mental trail she herself had once paved. “Upon entering an upper tier of Dead World everyone returns to how we saw ourselves in life. Finn and Jake young and in their prime… well, that’s typical, though Phoebe is a bit older than us biologically I suppose. But Simon is himself again, and I’m sure he misses you.” The pink hand tilted her mate’s chin upward. “Why don’t we go find them? Finn had always been adamant that once you came to us it would ‘complete the party’… though admittedly I’m not quite sure what that means. Regardless, he always intended to throw one to celebrate, and I suppose that’s why he’s run off with Jake.” Her laughter was lighter now, for there was something just so endearing about her lover’s look of confusion. But her tears were slowing, and that was all that mattered. “We all missed you. Every one of us,” she repeated, emphasized. “Why don’t we go join them?”

“…Why doesn’t the sun hurt now?” Marceline's hand reached for her throat reflexively once again but, no, her amulet, her shield, was still gone.

“Because Dead World causes you to enter as you had always wanted to be. How you saw yourself. Lady Evil was always just a profession for you, just as Queen Bubblegum was just a role for me. Dead World requires neither, and so you’re my mercurial imp once more. Less a blood-thirsty vampire and more of a warmth leech in the form of a little bat.” Her hand trailed north, scritching behind a sensitive ear. Just as she expected and hoped the vampire’s eyes reflexively slid shut, head tilting into the touch. “Come, little bat. Let’s go home. It wouldn’t surprise me if your bass was waiting with Schwabl. Let’s go to them.”

The musician hesitated to accept the invitation. There was one thing she had to know for sure. Bonnibel wouldn't approve, but if she didn't check she would lose the tenuous grip on her reclaimed sanity. With a silent apology to the younger woman she lifted her hand, still cool under the artificial sun, and bit. Just as she hoped it drew dark, dead blood, which flowed just so much before her body knitted the flesh whole again. It was reassuring in a way she hadn’t expected, but she supposed, in the back of her mind at least, that it was a sense of normalcy, that this really was her and thus this must truly be her Bonnibel. And yet… “I… I can’t Bon…”

“Turn into a little bat for me, Marcy. You don’t have to do this alone anymore.” Somehow, that was enough, and because it was a request and not an order she complied, a small bat taking the vampire’s place. She was lifted, a pink cheek nuzzling her soft fur. “I had forgotten how adorable you are in this form.” When the bat squinted Bonnibel gave a knowing smirk, the same one that declared that she was right and she knew it. She was, after all, the smartest woman alive. It wouldn’t surprise the ex-Lady Evil if she were the smartest woman dead as well.

“…Okay. I’m ready. I think.”

Bonnibel cupped her small body, cradling her against her chest. If there was one thing that would entice Marceline not to panic it was the steady rhythm of her heartbeat. “If you’re not that’s alright as well. We have more than enough time for you to adjust, and you will. The adjustment period differs per individual, but you can show vulnerability if you need to. No one will hold it against you, and once you’re adjusted I imagine no one will mention it again.”

When Bonnibel set off in some direction the bat didn’t understand she let her eyes close. In fact, she didn’t understand any of this, but if her BonBon said it was alright she would trust her, for the candy woman had always been her guiding hand, had always protected her from herself. She tried her hardest to stay awake, but evidently sleep was a thing in Dead World, too. Her final thought before succumbing was how much she had to learn because everything else was too overwhelming. But that was alright. She had time. She had all the time in the world.

For the first time in her nearly two thousand years of Unlife, she considered it a good thing.

Chapter Text

Dear mom:

This is kind of awkward, right? Writing a letter to you when you’re dead. And when I’m dead. I mean, I was already dead before I got here but. You know. Well, Bonnie said it’d be good to write you a letter about what’s going on. Which is weird, right? You know what’s weirder, though? I just realized my wife has spent more time with my mom than I have.

Okay, right, let me start over. Hi mom. I’m dead. Well, I guess I was dead before, but now I’m actually dead. Like, for realzorz. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m cool with it and all. I lived way too long, found my mate, had a kid with her, then my kid had kids. Not to mention being the Scream Queen, Lady Evil, kinda defacto queen of the Candy Kingdom for awhile (that was super awkward though, let’s not talk about it, okay?), even went dimension-hopping for awhile and a bunch of other stuff. I wiped out an entire species, saved the humans, like, twice, became the vampire queen, and I went out on my own terms and everything, so not a bad life, right?

I mean, it sucked donkeys when I lost Bon, though. And I was Lady Evil by then, so it wasn’t like I could join her. ‘Sides, I had to keep Penelope safe, right? Oh yeah, you don’t know her. She’s my daughter. So, I guess you have a granddaughter, and I gotta say, I totes appreciate how hard you had it with me, ‘cause as much as I rock looking after your kid without your mate… it sucks, mom. And it sucked you weren’t there.

Anyway, yeah. Penny turned out righteous. So much like Bon it hurts. Then she met some demon who I hate, but she gave me grandkids, so I guess it works out. Oh yeah, I guess that means you have a great-grandson and great-granddaughter. They’re righteous too, just like their mom.

But like I was saying, it was really hard without Bon. I know you’ve met her by now, since she died way before I did and I KNOW the first thing she did when she got to Dead World was look you up. I mean, I would.

Well, I guess I didn’t? I know, I suck sometimes. But… it’s hard, mom. I went hundreds of years without Bon, didn’t think I’d ever see her again ‘cause of the whole ‘Lady Evil for eternity’ thing. Death was really clear that if for some I did find a way out of that gig it's 'torture for eternity'  in my future. But Judith really wanted to follow in my footsteps. I tried to stop her. Thought the Candy Kingdom would do great for her. But she loves the Nightosphere, and I gotta admit, the thought of True Death was really nice after so many centuries without Bon and doing the whole ‘solo’ thing. I’m a bassist, mom. I need a lead. So, when Judith took over I just… went to Bon's grave and waited for the sun.

Gotta admit, though, I kind of expected to go to a really low-level Dead World, like Death promised. But Bon’s THE brainlord, and she figured out some weird legal thing that Life liked enough to convince Death to let me come here. I didn’t believe it. I still don’t. I can’t believe we’re together again. Not just her, either. Finn, Jake, Pheebs, BMO… everyone’s here. Sometimes I can’t believe it and I need to go off, be by myself again. Then I remember how much it sucks, so I go back.

I know I’ve been here for awhile and I still haven’t looked you up. Sorry, mom. Bon thought it would help me if I wrote you this letter to help me out with that. She says you two have tea together all the time, and she’d give it to you next time for me. Glob, that’s so weird to think about, you two just… hanging out. I wanted to find you after I got here and got used to getting here, but it’s hard, you know? There’s a lot I want to ask, but I’m not sure if I’m ready to know. Why did you leave, mom? Do you miss me up here? Was any of it worth it? And, I guess… are you proud of me?

I miss you, mom. I know it’s dumb, ‘cause I could go find you any time now, and I know you know I'm here, too, you're just respecting my space, which is like the complete and total opposite of dad and what he did when I didn't look him up fast enough.

Dead World’s big, but I’ve been to bigger. Oh man, like this one place, where I met a me that was queen of the vampires still, right? But she didn’t actually kill ‘em all so they were trying to kill her and needed me to bail them out. She had a Bonnie, too, and they raised my friends in my world, but as their kids? It was weird, okay?

Ugh, Bon says I’m stalling and I hate it when she’s right. This whole time I’ve been thinking about all the stuff I wanna tell you but I can’t get the words right. Writer’s block sucks. So, I guess I decided,. I’m gonna give this to you myself. Then I gotta figure it out, right? Pretty sure that’s how it works. Well, whatevs.

I love you, mom. See you soon,

-Marcy

Chapter Text

Mom was never the same after mama died.

When I was young, I was fascinated by mama’s ability to catch mom in a lie. Mom was a fantastic liar, something she said always served her well at life and at work. She could lie to her demons and she could lie to fellow cosmic entities. She could deceive her father, Death, even herself. She even saw fit to teach me everything she knew, believing that the ability to fool someone was an essential survival skill. She was a master at it, a true artist. But she could never fool mama. She would try, of course, usually with a lop-sided grin that hid her actions but not her intent, but mama saw through her every single time. “It’s her eyes,” mama told me one day. “Your mother can change any part of her she wishes, but her eyes will give her away every time.”

I was a child at the time, and had laughed when she told me this with her self-satisfied, knowing smirk. It really was funny to think about. The ruler of the Nightosphere, evil incarnate itself, no match for a queen made of gum? Mama had tried to teach me what she knew, because just as mom believed lying was a vital skill mama believed detecting deception was just as important. “For when you become queen one day,” she had said, and I would just roll my eyes because both of my parents are immortal and had lived for well over a century. Still, there was wisdom in mama’s coaching, and I had tried my hardest to see through mom’s tricks and schemes. I never succeeded.

Not until mama died.

“I’m fine, Penny. No worries.”

That had been the first time I had caught mom in a lie, and it made my blood run cold. She had given me the same reassuring smile she had always given me when I asked how she was doing, that day at mama’s funeral, but I could see the pain in her eyes. Something, some light I didn’t even know was supposed to be there was missing. Instead something new had taken its place, something that made me grossly uncomfortable, that made me clench Raak’s hand even as mom fixed them with a level stare, begrudgingly accepting them as my mate out of respect for our soulbond and the desire to see me happy, and nothing more. Even then her heart hadn’t been in her normal animosity, I could tell. There was no fire. Literally or metaphorically.

“Head back, okay? I’ll catch up.”

Except mom never set foot in the castle again after that day. Jan had tried to joke that mom was finally obeying stereotypical vampire rules, that maybe I should try explicitly inviting her back into the palace that had been her home for hundreds of years. Instead she had decapitated him with her axe. Her heart wasn’t in that either. Raak thought it was funny, but they were too smart to say so.

Instead she threw herself into her work, leaving the Nightosphere only when the situation - either literally or socially - called for it. Of course, she was always there when I wanted or needed her. She was right there for my wedding, because despite mama’s best attempts Ooo never did recognize a soulbond as a legal establishment and more’s the pity, even if Raak was clearly and adorably taken with the whole event. She was there for the births of both of my children, lending no small effort to helping to raise them and teach them what it meant to be part demon, what it meant to live as such on the surface world. She still kept a watchful eye on the descendants of her friends long since passed. She preserved all of mama's accomplishments and protected all of her territories, all of the places they shared together.

But there was no more music after mama died. When she decapitated Jan it didn’t escape my notice that her axe lacked all of the necessary accouterments for it to play music. The concert hall, that extension of the Citadel she had painstakingly built from materials imported from Ooo itself was sealed shut, with no demon daring to mention its existence even in hushed whispers. It was only be executive order - my executive order to be precise - that her records and albums were preserved as Candy Kingdom national treasures. It was the only way I could be sure that my children would know their grandmother had the most hauntingly beautiful voice.

Mom was there, but she wasn’t. She supported me, loved me, guided me. She was every much the same mom she had always been, so long as you didn’t look too closely. Unfortunately for her, I took after mama just a little too much; I appreciated the effort mom put in to make sure I understood and could make music, but I was a scientist at heart. Of course, I studied the science of sound, but musicology was an important field of study with any number of practical applications, thank you very much.

“Your mama would be proud,” mom had said with a beaming, watery smile.

She denied it vehemently, but I knew how much of her she saw in me. I knew how much it hurt her. So I never faulted her reticence, or the way she retreated into herself. She was just as loving and somehow even more frustratingly protective as she had always been when I was a child, but the wisdom only age can grant allowed me to see her as the person she was, flawed and in pain, instead of the infallible super-weapon that I grew up idolizing. I pretended not to notice the steel locket she wore tucked under the shield of her suit. I forbade my gardeners from touching mama’s rose garden, leaving it under mom’s devoted care. I told my children stories of my parents so that mom’s voice wouldn’t crack when she tried to tell them instead. Above all, I pretended not to see the pain in her eyes when she looked at me, hidden beneath her love and pride. We never talked about mama's death. Maybe we should have, objectively speaking, but mom never was good at objectivity. I was just as much her daughter as mama's, though, and whereas I knew mama would've pushed the issue I knew that as much as I wanted that closure, mom needed to be allowed to run. I knew what she was running from. I understood.

I couldn’t imagine the agony of feeling a soulbond severed. My mothers had, in essence, grown up together in the way only immortals could. Their relationship spanned almost seven hundred years before I was conceived, had lasted over a century by the time that bond had been shattered. I took comfort in knowing that at least mama wasn’t suffering; although mom was arrogant - they both were, really, at least that wasn’t a trait I inherited - she was every bit the schemer mama was, just in her own weird way. Before I was even born she had somehow persuaded Death to let mama into Dead World at the highest tier should she ever die, though she was reluctant to share how she had pulled that one off. Not even mama knew, and somehow her frown at being robbed of the knowledge had only ever made mom laugh harder.

I missed the sound of mom’s laughter. That died, too, along with her music.

The best my children and I would ever get were soft chortles, though she did give me a sincere, proud, smile the first time my daughter produced fire. Judith took after my mom in a way I never did and found the Nightosphere fascinating. Somehow she had managed to wear down mom’s resistance and was even allowed to shadow her at work, though it only made her love the job even more. Not that it would ever be her’s, mom would emphasize. Repeatedly. Usually while tapping her amulet with her claw to remind everyone that she was, regrettably, Deathless. Mom was mercurial, flashy, and arrogant, but she was also the most loyal person I had ever met and had set a standard I thought impossible, at least until my own mate wandered into my life. She was loyal to mama, but she was also loyal to her committments, too. And she was committed to her duty.

As cliche as it was it had hit me in the middle of the night - poor Raak, I almost gave them a heart attack - that because of that duty she begrudgingly prized mom would never see mama again. Beinng exempted from Death’s scythe meant that their souls would never be reunited, and suddenly mom’s morose attitude made perfect sense. She would live eternity in agony of that destroyed bond, because that amulet she was so reluctantly proud of was a curse that could only be passed through blood. I was already queen of the Candy Kingdom, and though I knew my daughter would leap at the opportunity to take her grandmother’s place, mom was always adamant that this duty, this curse, ended with her. And she was Endless.

But I was nothing if not my mama’s daughter, and while mom was willing to be resigned to her fate mama had taught me that all problems have solutions, so long as you knew what questions to ask. Trusting Raak to distract mom long enough to not notice her precious pickle jar being pilfered from her room, and with a silent promise to both them and Jan that I would make their grievous injuries up to them, I had met with the one being I thought could persuade Death to change his mind.

Prismo was an old family friend, and he was happy to put me in contact. “Please,” I implored Life. “I know mom has a contract with Death, but there has to be a different way. I love my mother, and mama died saving me.” Whereas her husband was cold and heartless Life had always been warm and compassionate. Though she could give me no details she assured me that mom herself was what prevented their reunion, that another contract superseded the agreement she and Death had with one another. Life had never lied to me before. This was where mama and I differed as rulers, I had realized immediately after my coronation: she had trusted no one, save for her mate. I would not make that mistake. More than one ruler had met their demise by trust too easily, but more than one opportunity had been squandered from inappropriate mistrust.

Maybe Death was conniving, but Life had always found my parents' relationship to be one of the Universe's greatest bright spots.

After returning home I bided my time. Nothing important had ever been done in haste. Mama had taught me that. So I planned, just like mama taught me. I anticipated every possibility. I prepared Raak for what was about to happen, then I summoned my daughter and son to me for a secret, yet essential, conversation. Uther had cried, as I knew he would, but Judith had understood. Actually, she had grinned that same grin mom had when she finally wore mama’s resistance down, but that would be a headache for a different evening. Although mom liked to only return to Ooo when specifically requested, or to tend to mama’s garden in secret, there was one night I could always count on her making an appearance.

Just as it had ended, it began with a meteor shower.

It was surreal, seeing mom at mama’s grave. I knew she went there every year, leaving the most beautiful of roses for her and apprising her of the previous year’s events. Time passes different for immortals. Instead of a calendar they tend to use temporal landmarks, and that meteor shower was important to mom, important to both of my parents. Their first date was under that shower, they had been married under that shower. Cruelly, mama had been killed the night of that shower, and one year later exactly she had been buried under its glistening light, as was tradition.

Although I normally wouldn’t attempt to hide the sounds of my approach - mom’s hearing was too precise for that to ever work, I had learned that the hard way as a child - I attempted anyway, out of respect for her privacy. It was odd, seeing her out of her suit, in torn jeans and some t-shirt. As a child it was a common sight. As an adult it was a rare treat. Even now I could hear the spectre of my mama’s voice calling her outfit distasteful. It made me smile, even if it didn’t make me deaf to the one-sided conversation.

“-so proud of her, Bon. Penny’s got this whole queen thing down. Made some pretty righteous changes you probs wouldn’t approve of, but you know? She actually made a legit treaty with the Fire Kingdom. Like, without using the Nightosphere as a liaison. It was amaze-balls. The Kingdom’s in mondo-awesome hands.” Even as her chuckle was forced I couldn’t help my blush of pride at my mom’s words. She wasn’t one to pay false compliments or criticisms, even to me; she said and did exactly as she meant and wanted to. Refreshing, really, given the pressures of ruling. I never needed to question where mom stood on anything.

“I miss you, Bon.” Her voice cracked, and my smile dropped. “It’s…” I heard her sigh and dared to peek from my hiding place behind the gateway that marked the grounds a second time. Whereas before she had been floating she now sat - actually sat - with her arms wrapped around her knees. Something was clasped in her hand, something small and square, but in the dark I couldn’t see what. I never inherited her night vision. “I know Death held up his end of our deal, so you’re pretty up there in Dead World, huh? Gotta be with Finn and Jake and Phoebe and Simon everyone else, right? How are they doing?” Her voice began to shake and I looked away, knowing I was intruding on something deeply personal. “It’s just… so hard without you, BonBon. I know you’re probs doing your science junk to your heart’s content… but we had science down here, you know?” And then I heard it. A sound I had never heard before in centuries of life, something that made my heart drop and my skin crawl.

Through a soft, almost imperceptible declaration of her love, my mother was crying.

It was hard to imagine my mother doing such a thing. I knew she was more emotional than my mama - and I had the stories from Uncle Finn and Uncle Jake in my youth to prove it - I had always thought those emotions to be limited to the spectrum of rage. It was hard to see Lady Evil as someone who could or would express such despair, and harder still to think of the woman who gave me life, who raised me, protected me, nurtured me, and protected me as having those kinds of feelings, but there they were. And it solidified my decision.

Though it was telling that mom hadn’t heard my approach already I made just enough noise to reveal my position, giving her the chance to conceal her sorrow. It was the respectful thing to do. It was the kind thing to do.

I heard her snarl, but once she saw who was encroaching on her personal time with my mother’s headstone her demeanor changed. She was floating again, the square object clutched in her hand. The smile she greeted me with was arrogant and knowing, though it was obvious to me that she was counting on the cover of night to hide the signs that this was a bluff. “What are you doing out so late, mein Schatzi?”

I may have not been able to decipher my mom’s expression, but I knew she could see me as clearly as ever. There was no sense hiding my eyeroll. Maybe it would relieve some of the tension. “I thought I would find you out here.” I thought I heard a forced snicker before she seemed to turn back to the grave. I lowered my voice respectfully, both for my mama’s resting place and for the heavy atmosphere. “I wanted to see how you were.”

“Just catching your mama up.” There was a tightness in her voice. And then it was gone. “So what, you got bored? Or is this your way of admitting I was right and that-”

A sigh of irritation escaped me. I didn’t try too hard to stop it. “Mom, for the last time. I’m very happy with Raak. They are a perfect mate. We have two beautiful children, a soulbond, and they never stop striving to make me happy.”

“Now, Penelope-”

“Grandfather wasn’t thrilled with your soul’s choice in a mate, and now you aren’t thrilled with mine. Doesn’t that tell you something?”

She was quiet, and for a moment I believed she might actually reflect on her behavior. My mistake. The same one, coincidentally, I knew mama made just as often. “Seems like it’s a family tradition at this point! Can’t mess with that, right?”

I closed my eyes, rubbing my left temple. The headache would have to wait until after this conversation. “Mom, I didn’t come out here to talk about Raak or the children. I came out here to talk about mama.”

I didn’t need night vision to see her wince. Even if she hid her tears she always wore her heart on her sleeve. “What did you want to talk about?,” she asked, more tension than I’m sure she meant sneaking into her voice.

It was now or never, quite literally. “I know you miss her.”

I expected her to deny it, or to at least discourage my inquiry. Her modus operandi was to deflect heavy or important conversations until she was ready, and I was prepared to redirect her attention until she cooperated. I didn’t expect the sigh of resignation, or the small white flame to ignite in her palm. “Come here, Penny. There’s something I want to show you.” With a skeptical, raised eyebrow I did as requested, joining my mom and politely pretending that the fire didn’t illuminate the fact she had recently been crying. Mama had taught me the importance of tact. Instead I focused on the rectangular object in her hand.

It was a picture frame of all things. Though the picture it held was old and a bit grainy it was in remarkably good condition, probably from having been kept in the Nightosphere and thus shielded from the effects of time. “Mom… is that…?”

It was my mothers, impossibly younger, laughing and cuddling together against a meteor shower backdrop. Mama was squirming a bit, making her left arm a bit blurry, and mom was off-center, clearly trying to level the camera with her telekinesis. As she followed my gaze mom’s smile was fond. Sad. She watched me, not her picture. “That was the first picture we took together, on our first date.”

“The one you two didn’t even know was a date?”

Her laugh was refreshingly free of grief. “Yeah. Your mama was the one who dragged me out there. I wanted to work on my jams, she wanted to prove to me science isn’t lame.”

“Science isn’t lame,” I huffed.

Her groan was, of all things, affectionate. Warm. “You sound just like your mama.”

“One of us has to,” I grumbled.

“Probably, yeah.” She kissed the top of my head. “I’ve kept this picture safe ever since that day. I know we have tons more, and some fancy portraits I'm still finding in my stuff, but… this one’s special.”

I gazed intently into that picture, at the images of my mothers from before my time, from before there was even a Candy Kingdom. Back when they shared a little cabin by Butterscotch Lake and were still new to trusting anyone, including themselves. I knew how their story began. And I knew how it was going to end, even if mom didn’t yet. “…I miss her,” I whispered.

“I miss her too, Penny. Every day.”

I rubbed the back of my neck, a nervous gesture I knew I inherited from mom. “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”

Even in the dim light of her fire I saw my mother’s suspicious eyebrow. “What did you do and whose soul do I get to suck out?”

“No. No soul sucking.”

“Spoilsport.”

“I think you should be with mama.”

Mom could hide a lot of things, but not her grimace. “Penny, we’ve been over this. My place is here. Well, technically it’s in the Nightosphere, but my lair my rules, and right now-”

“Mom,” I interrupted. Rude, I know, but necessary. “I know. You’re the force that stabilizes the Nightosphere, but we both know how enamored Judith is with your job. She would take it over in a heartbeat if allowed.”

“Yeah, and I’m not allowing it.”

“But mom-”

“No, Penelope Abadeer.” she growled out. I wasn’t used to her voice being this firm, to her full-naming me. Traditionally mama was the stern one, but the topic of the Nightosphere and her role in its existence was a sore one, so I didn’t blame her. “This is a curse. Not one I would inflict on my own daughter or my grand daughter. I made my decision-”

“You made your decision back when you thought mama was gonna be with you forever.” Even in the dim light I could see her eyes narrow.  It was a challenge, a cruel one, but it commanded her focus and her ire was more palatable than her sadness. More palatable, and easier to work with. “I’m sorry, mom, but we both know it’s true. You never would have agreed if you ever really thought-”

“That was my mistake. End of discussion.” She turned to leave, the flame still ignited in a subtle cue that I was meant to leave with her.

“I talked to Life.” That stopped her, though she didn’t turn back. “And Prismo. In the Time Room.”

Now she turned back, the fire flaring briefly in a rare lapse of self-control before she could reel herself in. “Are you nuts?! I know my parenting style was always a little lax, but I’m pretty sure your mama would wig out if she heard that!”

I gave her a poignant smile. “No, mom, you’re wigging out. Mama did whatever she had to to solve a problem.” And I’m not my mama, but this would have been a bad time to start poking old wounds. “I know you love me, and I know you love Judith and Uther. You’ve spent your entire life protecting us and Ooo and the memories of everyone you’ve lost, but… they’re just that. Memories. You don’t have to keep doing it.”

“This is my place.” It wasn’t exactly cold, but it was a hard warning.

“Mom, I love you. You’ve always been there for me. You’re the best mom I could ask for. But I know you miss mama. I have a soulbond too, and I can’t imagine what it would be like to lose Raak. I only know it would be agony beyond compare."

“I am contractually obligated-”

“Mom, please. I know you take your legal biz and junk really seriously, but I talked to Life. She said there’s another contract that takes precedence over the one you have with Death. I know you don’t trust him, but Life has only ever been kind. She made sure mama’s soul got to Dead World safely, remember?”

Of course mom would remember. Life almost had to pry her soul out of mom’s claws, could hear the silent screams of a shattered soulbond the rest of the universe was deaf to. But she had escorted mama to the highest tier of Dead World herself, granting her safe and smooth passage. Death may have been bitter that mom was proficient in tricking him out of what was rightfully his, but Life held nothing in her heart but love.

I expected mom to ask about the secondary contract, to press me for details I would have loved to give but didn’t know myself. Perhaps she sensed a non-disclosure agreement, or perhaps, deep down, she really just wanted an excuse to try to rebel against Prophecy and the Universe one last time. Regardless- “…One year.”

My heart fluttered. “Mom?”

She sighed, the warm tone returning to her voice. It never could stay away for long. Not when it came to me. “Give me one year to think about it.”

I smiled and ran over, hugging her tightly. She returned the embrace. It was the best I was going to get out of her right now. Besides, what was a year to an immortal? “Thank you.”

As it would turn out, the decision would not take a full year. Perhaps mom had requested an audience with Life herself to confirm my claim, or perhaps she was just willing to accept True Death after hundreds of years of endless Unlife and risk whatever fate Death had promised her. Regardless, to grand ceremony and press release she turned over the chaos amulet to my daughter who, despite having been thoroughly exposed to the worst the Nightosphere - and the job itself - had to offer thrived in a way that would make my grandfather proud. Though she and her brother would mourn her loss they, too, were adults and understood that she had existed for almost two centuries and done her job, had even saved Ooo itself more than a handful of times, and now the time had come to reap her reward and go home.

Letting go was always difficult for mom. For a woman who often professed that everything changed and that control was an illusion she tried awfully hard to hold on to the past. I was proud of her. Too proud to send her off alone. It was for that reason I ignored her wishes to spend her last night on Ooo alone at mama’s grave. Instead we sat together under the meteor shower, just the three of us, though one of us was silent while she and I exchanged our farewells and promises to be together again one day, when Death’s scythe would inevitably come for me. Though I had inherited mama’s effective immortality I never shared her wish to use it. She never understood that. Mom did.

Speaking of which.

“Mom?”

“Yes, mein Schatzi?”

I hummed, looking up at the night sky. Over the past year I had grown accustomed to seeing mom without a suit, had gotten used to carrying the weight of her axe strapped to my back. But there was one thing I hadn’t gotten used to, and never would. “Before you go home to mama… will you sing for me? Like when I was a little girl?”

Mom smiled, a real one this time. “Come here, Penny.”

Perhaps it was silly. I was hundreds of years old myself and queen of the most powerful kingdom in the world besides, but I would never say no to a lullaby from my mom. Just as I did when I was a little girl I slid into her arms, letting my head rest against her shoulder as my eyes closed. As she stroked my hair she sang, soft and gentle, filling my mind with idyllic scenery and dreams of finding that which was once lost. She sang of gardens and home, of the promise that everything stayed even if it looked like it changed. Though I didn’t mean to, I cried into her shoulder, not hard, but softly and effortlessly.

I pulled away when her song was finished, kissing her cheek. I was ready. “Thanks, mom.” Her smile was knowing, more like the one I knew than the strained one that had taken its place since mama’s death. It said what we were both thinking: We both needed that. “Take care of mama until I join you both, okay?”

“There’s still time to ask me not to, you know.”

I nodded. “I do know. Please do it anyway. I know how much you love me and the children, but I think if you leave mama alone for too long up there she’ll disassemble Dead World, and then we’ll have something worse than the Night released on Ooo.”

She snickered. “Natch. Your mama’s nuts. You should watch out for that, pretty sure it’s hereditary.”

“You’re both nuts. Fortunately, the two cancel one another out.” With one last hug I stood, leaving her beside mama’s resting place. “Safe journeys, mom. I’ll see you soon. I love you.”

I felt the telekinetic force of her hug. “I love you too, Penny. If you need me I’m pretty sure you can convince Life to let me visit.”

“I’m sure I could. With that said, you and mama prepared me adequately. We’ll be fine. Go home, mom," I emphasized. "Sheesh.”

Now it was her turn to roll her eyes at me. “Fine, fine. Get out of here. I promised your mama I’d never stake myself, but the sun’ll be up soon.”

There was nothing more to be said, and I wouldn’t want her final moments to be worrying about mentally scarring me with the sight of her True Death. “Alright, mom. Just one more thing.”

Before she died mama had taught me the secret of how she was able to get a picture with mom if vampires couldn’t be reflected in mirrors, and when I produced her small mirrorless camera she knew exactly what I wanted. Just as she always did, she obliged me.

When mom passed she did so at mama’s side, and at peace.