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Josh doesn't even know who this kid is, but one of these days he's gonna kill him.
This kid always manages to get here just before Josh and always manages to take the last sandwich that Josh likes. Josh is getting very tired of having to eat turkey sandwiches everyday. He wants his damn ham sandwich.
It doesn't matter what Josh does. One time he got there fifteen minutes early and that kid still managed to get the last one. Josh kind of wants to smash the little shit's head in.
(It may seem like an overreaction, but Josh has been putting up with this for months.)
"I'm going to do something about it," Josh says decisively one day.
Mark doesn't look up from his own sandwich. He's content with turkey, so he doesn't have a problem with the kid taking the last of the ham.
"And what are you going to do, Josh?" Mark asks, not seeming to really be paying attention.
"I'm going to rip out the kid's hair and shove it down his throat," Josh says, looking for a reaction.
"Cool," Mark says, and Josh rolls his eyes as he stands up and heads for where the kid is sitting.
The guy is sitting with some girl, giggling with her and he takes a bite out of the sandwich. Josh's sandwich.
Frick.
Josh slides in across from the kid, hands making a loud slap noise as he sits down. Both the kid and his friend jump.
"So," Josh begins, but trails off. Because heck, the kid is adorable. Josh kind of wants to pick him up and put him in a bubble where nothing will ever hurt him and he will remain cute and adorable forever. Josh also kind of wants to pick him up and put him on a bed somewhere and bang him.
Then Josh remembers the sandwich and subsequent the skull-smashing thing.
Josh is a very confused, conflicted teenager.
"Can I help you?" the kid asks hesitantly, and frick, even his voice is adorable.
"Right, yes," Josh says. He opens his mouth to say, "Give me your sandwich," but instead, "Will you go out with me?" comes sliding out.
The kid and his friend both stare at him.
"Uh," the kid says. "I don't even know your name."
"I'm Josh," Josh says, pretending that he doesn't want to run away with his metaphorical tail tucked between his legs.
"I'm Tyler," the kid says. He points to the girl sitting next to him. "That's Jenna. Do you really want to go out with me?"
"Yes," Josh says. "And I also want your sandwich." There! There's something that he meant to say.
"Okay," Tyler says slowly.
"Awesome," Josh says, grabbing the sandwich and taking a bite.
"...I meant 'Okay' to us going out, but that works too, I guess," Tyler mumbles.
"I'll call you," Josh says, nodding as he stands up. He got a sandwich and a date. Score.