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John Lennon had a problem. It wasn’t too serious, but it definitely was a problem that he considered the worst one possible. He sat awake on the floor of George’s room, sniffling as he realised the blankets he shared with Stuart was soaked. And so were his pants. He carefully lifted one blanket off himself to find that the wet spot he’d created went all the way up his shirt. Thank god none of it had gotten on Stuart or he would’ve died right then and there.
But once he had the blanket off of him, Stuart rolled over in the bed, wiping at his eyes. “John, what are you doing up? It’s the middle of the bloody night…”
John held his breath as if that would make the whole situation go away. But Stuart’s gaze moved down to where his friend was clutching at his pyjama pants in an attempt to hide what had happened.
“Oh, god… What did you…?”
“Oh, fuck off. I didn’t do it on purpose.” John stood from the pallet on the floor and grimaced at the piss dripping from his saturated bottoms. “Could you just help me clean this up before they wake up and see?”
When John looked over at the bed, where George and Paul were still peacefully asleep, Stuart grinned. “Yeah, yeah, alright. Couldn’t have anybody knowing that John Lennon’s a human like everybody else.”
“It’s not that! It’s just embarrassing.” Stuart got up to get a better look at John, seeing that he was about to cry over this.
“God, love, don’t cry about it. You’re alright. We’ll get it cleaned up.” He immediately started to pull the blanket up, and thankfully, it seemed to have absorbed all the liquid, leaving the floor dry. “Have you got any other pyjamas with you?”
John shook his head. “No, I didn’t think I was gonna piss myself!” Stuart realised how close he was now to bursting into tears, so he dropped the blanket and pulled off his pants and shirt, throwing them at John. “What are you doing?”
“Just put them on! I don’t mind.” With that, he continued balling up the blanket and checking to see if the other one was wet. It wasn’t.
“R-right here?”
“I don’t care, John. I’m not fucking looking.” The older of the two continued moving things around until clothes were thrown at him, landing on the blanket. He quickly wrapped them up inside it and looked back at John, who had already pulled the pyjama pants up over himself.
“What now?” he whispered, glancing again at the bed, where the two younger boys were still sleeping.
“I don’t know. God, you think we could just go tell his parents?” Stuart replied quietly, hoping John would just realise that was the smartest thing to do.
“What? No! His parents find out, then he finds out and tells Paul and then they go and tell everybody else, and--”
“John, I think you’re overreacting a bit here.” But John just shook his head. “Alright. Then, what do you suppose we do with the blanket?”
“I don’t know, either! It’s not every fucking day I piss the bed!” His voice was getting louder, and Stu winced.
“You better keep it down or they’re going to wake up.” Just then, Paul shifted in the bed, and they both froze as he cracked his eyes open.
“What are you two doing awake?” He looked beside him at the night stand. “It’s nearly three.”
“Go back to sleep,” Stu said, John still frozen in his spot. “It’s none of your business.”
“Why are you half naked? Were you two--?” he started worriedly.
“No!” John shouted angrily, causing Paul to jump a bit and startle George, lying next to him. “Fuck,” he groaned when the other boy sat up in the bed, looking just as confused as Paul. But before he could even open his mouth to talk, Stuart spoke for John.
“John and I were having sex,” he said hurriedly. “And we were just trying to… erm… get things situated. Sorry to wake you or anything.”
Both of their eyes went wide, and George immediately fell back into his pillow, but Paul turned red and glared at John, whose face was now hidden behind his hands.
“John?” he said on the verge of tears. “H-how could you…?” He got up from the bed and ran from the room, causing George to sit up again, and Stuart looked over at John, jaw dropped.
“Oh, you’re kidding…” He seemed amused at the whole situation, but John was anything but.
“I hate you. I fucking hate you so much, words can’t even express-- fuck!” He ran out the door after Paul only to find that the boy hadn’t made it much further than the end of the hall. “Macca--”
“Fuck you!” Paul shouted at him, not caring who else he woke up. “I don’t know why I even trusted you in the first place! I was so stupid to fall in love with you--!”
“You love me?” John’s heart skipped a beat, but when he tried to get a bit closer to Paul, the younger boy turned his head. “Paul, look, I didn’t…” He laughed lightly at the thought of him and Stuart.
“You think this is bloody funny?”
“No, I just… Stu was lying.” The look he received told him that his friend wasn’t having any of this, and he would definitely have to elaborate. “Love, I pissed the bed, and he was helping me clean it up, and I didn’t want you and George to know, so he was just trying to get you back to sleep.”
“Really?” the other boy whispered hopefully, glancing over at John.
“Yes, really. You seriously think I would hook up with Stu?? I mean, of course he’s nice and my friend and all, but… Stu?” Paul giggled at it.
“Sorry, I wasn’t really thinking… and oh, god, what did I do?” When he started to freak out, John just kissed him.
“It’s alright. It was all my fault anyway.” Then they heard a door opening and looked down the hall, expecting to see George or Stu, but instead were met with the tired face of Louise Harrison.
“Boys?” she asked, voice heavy with sleep. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing, Mrs. Harr--”
“I wet myself,” John interrupted him, and the look on her face at that moment was priceless. “Could you just help us clean up a bit?”
With a curt nod, she followed the two boys back to the room, where George and Stuart were still in the same places they were five minutes ago, staring at the door. When Louise saw that they were all awake, she gave John a sympathetic look.
“Hey, mum,” George said shyly. “You’re awake?”
“Heard your friends fighting in the hall, and I figured something must be wrong.”
Stuart quickly gasped at the thought of John and Paul fighting. It was probably his fault. “John, I’m so sorry. Paul, we didn’t--”
“I know,” the boy replied. “Just…” He motioned to George’s mother anxiously. “It’s fine.”
Following the awkward silence, Louise looked between the four boys before bringing up the issue at hand, looking at her son. “So, your friend… wet the bed?”
George’s eyebrows shot up. “He what?!” He started to look over all his friends, trying to figure out who his mom was talking about.
“Oh, god,” John mumbled, but George just stared at him, shocked.
“John, did you--?” The older boy blushed madly but nodded anyway. There would be no point in trying to hide it now. But then George chuckled, and Stuart’s calm stature broke.
“It’s not funny!” he shouted, starting towards the made and causing George to flinch.
“I didn’t fucking mean to—“
“Language, George!” Louise shouted.
“Sorry, John. I wasn’t— I just didn’t expect— sorry.” John mumbled something.
“Erm, so w-were you in the bed..?” The woman looked around the room for some sort of clue as to what had to be cleaned up, and Stuart bent down to grab the blanket and the clothes wrapped up in it.
“This is all of it.” She accepted it, feeling how wet it was. John beside her cringed. He muttered another apology.
“No, love, it’s alright. Accidents happen.” She then left the room, leaving John there with a bright red face.
“John…?” Stuart said quietly. “You and Paul…”
“No,” the boy replied immediately. “No, we’re not talking about that right now.” He looked over at Paul and grabbed onto his hand. “We’re….”
“We figured that much,” Stuart said snarkily, causing George to throw a pillow at him.
“We won’t tell anybody is what he means.” George locked eyes with a nervous looking Paul. “It’s okay.”
“And you won’t tell anyone I pissed myself, either?” They all three shook their heads, and John just laughed. “God, why are we all so nervous, anyway? Thanks, guys.” Stuart grinned. “No thanks to you, though…”
“You were the one who didn’t want to go get his parents!” John shut his mouth. Stuart was right.
“Maybe we should get back to sleep,” Paul suggested shyly.
“Do I have to sleep with John again?” Stu said annoyingly. “I don’t really want to get peed on. No offence.”
John rolled his eyes, but Paul only went over to the bed and grabbed a new blanket and his own pillow. He started to lay it out on the floor.
“Well, I guess I’m with George, then.” George laid back down in his bed as Stuart climbed in and winked at John. “Hey, Paul,” he said, causing the boy to turn around.
“Yes?”
“He’s not wearing any underwear.” Both John and Paul blushed, and Stuart just laughed. “For real, though. Have at it.”