Chapter Text
The bell rang, interrupting Lambo's unplanned afternoon nap and his nightmare.
-Reborn! You're back!- Tsuna cheered from the hall. Lambo tried to wake up, he sat straight and cleaned a stream of saliva that probably poured from his mouth while he was sleeping. Embarrassing.
-Come in the living room, there's Lambo and Gokudera kun!- Tsuna added. In his post-sleep drowsiness and still scared from his dream, Lambo tried to pull himself together; he scratched his chest and tried to fix his dress shirt, at least just enough not to look like someone who has just escaped a tornado.
-Useless.- Gokudera muttered.
-Nh?
-You had to begin like fifteen years ago to make yourself presentable, you Stupid Cow. By now we all say you picking your nose and clean your finger in your hair.
-BAKADERA!- Lambo protested, while his cheeks went red. He knew he had been a pain in the ass and a quite disgusting child, but there really was no need to...
-Not to talk about all the times he cleaned his nose on his sleeve after crying like a baby.- said Reborn's voice from the doorstep. Gokudera threw the mystery magazine he was reading on the coffee table and got up to greet him, while Lambo stood sit, staring at the carpet. He listened with half an ear Gokudera's enthusiastic greetings and Reborn's calm answers, trying to forget the last time he had touched the killer.
He couldn't.
“Come on! Come on, wake up, you Stupid Cow, we need you!” Gokudera's voice, somewhere from outer space. Very, very far.
“No use for it, Gokudera, we have to retreat, there's no time!” Reborn, this one, closer. Very close, enough to suggest Lambo that the arms lifting him up are his.
Lambo opens his eyes just enough to focus on the killer's frowned face, then a thud: the sound of an explosion, Reborn's senseless body upon his, his empty and dull eyes.
“No... NO!” the air gets filled with electricity, while Lightning Flames erupt from Lambo, escaping his control; a rumbling noise, an imprecation from Gokudera, and suddenly it's all over.
And, by all, meaning just everything.
Lambo searches for Reborn's heartbeat, but he can't find it.
“NO!” he repeats, and his hand clutches on the precious cloth of the killer's jacket; the Flames run again, they build a cocoon around Reborn while Lambo feels as if someone was squeezing him, he feels emptied, abandoned by his Flames, he feels freezing. The world seems to catch fire, the sky goes black, the air fills up with the metallic scent of the ozone, like coins left in the sun, then suddenly Reborn's chest shrinks in a broken breath and his eyes are wide open and his body is shaking as if he was being electrocuted.
Which is exactly what happened.
How, or why, Lambo doesn't know. His education has been given to Fuuta, who hasn't the slightest idea of how to manage the Lightning Flames, so basically Lambo is a self tutored boy, not even a talented one.
Reborn's hand closes on Lambo's wrist, and the latter has the privilege and honor to catch the astonished glare of the world's best killer.
“Let's go away from here.” Lambo decides, lifting up Reborn.
“Let go of me, I can do it.” the killer protests, then he stumbles.
“Baka! Since when you're in charge?” Gokudera yells.
“Gokudera kun! He's right, we must go!” Tsuna, kind Tsuna, the one always ready to calm everyone down. Lambo takes Reborn on his shoulders and his weight is sweet.
-I'll make coffee.- Lambo said, getting up from the couch, -Hi, Reborn.
-Ciaossu, Lambo.- the killer replied. His voice sounded like the still, dense atmosphere before a storm: when they finally gathered to try to understand what had happened during the fight at the Vindice's ex prison, Lambo had been rudely scorned when he had claimed to have brought Reborn back to life. The mockery had gone on enough to get him to tears, covering him with shame and destroying the strange fantasies Lambo had cradled himself in, hoping that that episode would finally set a good light upon him and make the killer reconsider his person; but he turned out to pass as one who tries to show himself bigger and better than he really is. As usual.
Then, Reborn had left for Italy.
The ordeal had left him with painful aftermath: sore muscles, pain in his spine, tremendous migraines. And his Sun Flames couldn't seem to be able to fix it. Dino Cavallone knew a very good medical team and had proposed to have Reborn cured; after many long nights of torment, the killer had accepted.
Lambo opened a pack of coffee in grains, took a handful of it and started to grind them trying to be as quick as possible: he knew that the killer was going to come and kick him if he didn't have his coffee in a short time, and he really thought he couldn't bear it.
-So the Stupid Cow was telling the truth?- Gokudera asked, astonished.
-Seems so.- Reborn answered, -My problem was caused by some parts of my body that were decomposing. My Sun Flames were trying to attack them, but they can't do anything with dead meat. The necrotic parts were literally eating me alive.
-That's gross...- Tsuna murmured, his face pale.
-It was not a normal necrosis,- Reborn went on, -The doctors have found cadaverin when they made their analysis, and that's something that can only be found in dead bodies.
-Reborn, that's disgusting, please!- Tsuna protested.
-Dino spoke with Levi, of the Varia.- the killer went on as if Tsuna hadn't said a word, -He was a Bovino family member before being disowned, and he told him that some of the most powerful Lightnings of the Famiglia are able to kickstart hearts that have stopped beating.
-That's crazy... and we mocked him...- Gokudera muttered; his green eyes were looking down, full with shame.
-They work more or less like crash carts, they...- Reborn held out a hand towards the coffee table to take his coffee, but there was no cup. He felt an unusual shock of shame: they were so used to ignore Lambo that even while they were talking about him they cared so little not to notice he still wasn't coming back from the kitchen. More, they had assumed he came and went away: -Did he go to Italy to buy that coffee?- Reborn asked, faking disappointment, -I'll go and see what he's up to.
“He risked his life to save yours, you know?” Levi mutters, standing with his back straight in the military resting pose, a foot from the bed where Reborn is laying.
“He probably didn't know. Otherwise, he wouldn't have done so.” the killer replies.
“When you kickstart, your Flames are almost completely sucked up. Believe me, at half process you feel like you're dying.”
“Why did he do it, then? He wants to kill me since the first time we met.”
“You should ask him, not me.” Reborn shuts up, cornered by Levi's cold logic. He promises himself to heal as soon as possible, then go back to Japan and ask Lambo for an explanation. And to thank him.
-So, what about that coffee?- Reborn asked, entering the kitchen. Lambo jumped and a cloud of coffee powder that smelled like heaven puffed in front of him.
-I'm sorry... I...
-You have no idea of how to prepare a decent moka, don't you?- Reborn asked, then he blamed himself: even knowing he owed his life to Lambo, here he was mocking him as soon as he opened his mouth. Lambo didn't reply; he bowed his head and went on putting the grind coffee in the moka's filter with a shaking hand.
Reborn opened his mouth to speak, then realized he was looking at Lambo's muscles, barely hidden by his cow-printed dress shirt. He felt a sting of danger and went back to the living room without speaking.
-Levi said he can teach Lambo how to manage the Lightning Flames. He said that...- Reborn stopped. He was keeping an eye on the kitchen door, willing to show some kindness towards Lambo, so he managed to see him getting in, holding a plate with a small glass of water and a cup from which a heavenly smell was spreading: -Oh. Thank you, Lambo.
-You're welcome.- he answered, and Reborn frowned noticing he was blushing. That boy was acting really weird.
Gokudera wasn't as gentle: -So, we're sending him to Italy? For how long?
-Who?- Lambo asked, putting the cup and the glass in front of Reborn, who unbuttoned his jacket not to wrinkle it and leaned forward.
-You.- the killer answered, -Yes, that's the idea, since Levi can't conceive leaving Xanxus' side for more than ten minutes. I don't know how long, it depends.
-You... you're sending me away?- Lambo asked.
-Ah...- Tsuna said, -Don't... don't put it that way, it seems bad. We finally found someone that can teach you how to...
-YOU'RE SENDING ME AWAY?!
-Lambo, don't start whining.- Gokudera said. Lambo looked at him, sitting there relaxed, with both hands on the couch's back, not a problem in the world because he wasn't going to be sent away from the person he loved.
-Ga... ma... n...- Lambo blabbered, then he failed as usual. Tears flew uncontrolled from his eyes, while his chest shrunk in a lethal grip. Reborn huffed and Lambo realized he couldn't stand any other tiny bit of humiliation: he let the plate fall and ran away, far from that house where, he realized, he was not welcome. And never had been.
-That was not very kind of you, Gokudera.- Reborn said, taking his espresso cup. It took him all his self control to stop his hand from trembling; suddenly, he didn't give a damn about coffee, he only wanted to chase Lambo, stop him, explain that... well, explain something. Hug him, maybe, hug him and savor once again that warmth, that sense of soundness his body had given him.
“Shit.” he thought.
-It's him the one who's acting strange, lately... he doesn't do anything but listening to shitty music and wandering the place sighing.
-Does he?- Reborn asked, then he drank a sip of coffee. The taste enveloped his tastebuds in a wondrous cocoon, so much that he barely heard Tsuna say: -Oh, that just doesn't remind me of anybody!
-What do you mean?- Gokudera asked.
-I remember someone listening to Del Amitri so much that Ryohei broke into your room and threw the CD outside the window.- Reborn didn't interrupt, even if he could painfully recall the period after Gokudera had realized he was in love with Tsuna and before he found out that Tsuna loved him back: the coffee he was drinking was for sure the best he had ever drank in his whole life. And he had lived in Naples.
-Ach! Tsuna, that's different, I was in love!- Gokudera protested.
-And Lambo couldn't...
-Mother of God, this coffee is divine.- Reborn muttered, shutting the two of them, who turned around to look at him. Reborn tried to minimize: -What... uhm... what bland is it?
-Uhm... the usual one, I guess?- Tsuna said, then got up in a nervous jump and went to the kitchen; he came back holding a huge pack of coffee grains and added: -No, it's not. And I honestly have no idea where this comes from, I never saw it.- Gokudera shrugged.
-What were you saying?- he asked, ignoring the coffee matter. Almost disowning his Italian origins, he was more the kind of man to drink a barrel of instant coffee, so he barely cared about the moka blend.
-I was saying... wait, what was I saying?- Tsuna asked himself. Reborn took the pack of coffee and first of all he realized that the reason it was taking Lambo so long was that he was grinding the grains on the spot. Then he saw the Bovino's logo behind the pack and felt somehow honored because the boy was using his personal stack to prepare his coffee.
-Oh, yeah!- Tsuna said, putting a stop to Reborn's thoughts, -I was saying that Lambo could be in love, too!
-Oh, shit, I hope not. He's already a pain in the ass in normal situations, if he...
-Lambo doesn't drink coffee.- Reborn said abruptly.
-No, you're the only one who drinks that thing.- Tsuna replied, a bit lost for the sudden changes of subject. Reborn looked at the pack again and asked: -But if he doesn't drink coffee, why does the Bovino Family sent him a pack of Arabic blend? Besides, one of the most expensive.
-Because, as I was saying...- Tsuna said, in a condescending tone, -Lambo is in love.- Gokudera and Reborn looked at him, puzzled, and Tsuna huffed.
-Reborn. Finish that damn coffee and go look for him.- Tsuna said, and Reborn's eyes widened: it was the first time ever Tsuna talked to him that way.
-You hyper intuition...- he whispered. Tsuna raised an eyebrow and didn't reply. Reborn put the pack on the coffee table and stormed out, without even finishing his drink.
Two hours later, finally, he found Lambo hiding in the ruins of an old structure that maybe once upon a time was a playhouse for children. He was still crying, but in silence, his eyes staring into the void in front of him and tears rolling down his cheeks, the regular and slow breath of someone who has already thrown himself away.
-Lambo.- he called softly.
-Go away.- the other answered in a low voice.
-No. Make room.- Reborn replied, then he squeezed himself in the playhouse, pushing him with his hip to force him to move.
-You'll litter your trousers.- Lambo said, incoherently.
-They're the one I wear to travel, not the good ones.- Reborn answered, just as incoherently.
-Oh, yeah. Armani, common stuff.
-Lambo, we don't want to send you away.- Reborn declared, trying to find a comfortable position with his knees pierced in his chest. For a horrible moment he thought he was going to laugh: he had recalled an old gag by a trio of Italian comedians, where one of them was complaining about having his knees in his throat and another one told him “that's not my fault if you don't have torso and ass”.
-Yeah, right.
-Listen.- Reborn tried in vain to put a hand on his arm, but that damn playhouse was a hole that even a very slim rabbit would have refused. He managed to put an arm around his shoulders and felt him shiver. He went on: -We don't want to. But while I was at Cavallone's mansion we found out that you were right, you really kickstarted my heart. And this means that your Flames are incredibly powerful. You must be trained to use them, or you could lose control over them.
-What would happen?- Lambo asked. Reborn hesitated, then said: -You could die.- Lambo remained quiet for a while. Then, he whispered: -Let it be.
-Lambo, what the hell are you saying?- Reborn yelled.
-It'll be better for all of you. I'm useless, I'm just a weight, for you, for Tsuna, for everyone. You'll be better if I'm dead.
-Stop it, you idiot!- Reborn commanded. Lambo's shoulders went up, then down, under his arms, in a mute “as you wish”. Reborn sighed: -Listen. Yes, it's true, as a child you were a thorn in our sides. But if you haven't been able to shine it's our fault, we misbehaved... at four years old you were able to open your Box Heiki with no training at all, only with your determination. This should have told us enough about your strenght, but we merely gave you the bare minimum of education and that's all.- Reborn stopped, but Lambo didn't seem to be willing to reply. The killer had the strange, strong temptation of holding him, allowing him to cry as long as he wanted against his chest and make him feel loved; after having examined his feeling, then, he felt almost overwhelmed by the urge to run away. He couldn't, not him, not the ruthless, cold-blooded killer of the Vongola Famiglia, not the strongest among the Arcobaleno, it wasn't him, it couldn't be him. He couldn't be the one to have fallen in love with the most catastrophic human being of the whole world, the most irritating member of the Mafia.
-Can I ask you something, Lambo?- he asked. He wanted, he had to know.
-Shoot.- Reborn hesitated, asked himself what was possessing him, then he acted: he took out his gun and pointed it against Lambo's jaw.
-The hell are you doing, baka?!
-You told me to shoot.- Reborn said. Lambo glared at him, and his eyes were the reflections of pines in the still water of a mountain lake; Reborn wavered, then Lambo laughed.
-Baka! You're stuck on stupid!
-I wanted to see you laugh.- Reborn confessed, putting away his gun. He allowed himself a tiny smile for the good end of his mission, then he got serious again: -Anyway. Levi told me that what you've done is extremely painful. Why didn't you leave me there?- the smile faded on Lambo's face, and he looked at his own knees again. Reborn waited patiently for an answer. After what felt like hours, Lambo eventually whispered: -Because I love you.- Reborn felt his cheek getting hot, and once again his running instinct came back.
Yes, to run away and try to somehow forget that chaotic, gorgeous boy: he had had many relationships, but none of them involved particular feelings. He only liked the possibility to wave a hand and have a body that was ready to use, to feel the power of being able to completely control another human being. But he was sure that this time it was more complicated.
Maybe encouraged by the lack of a disgusted reaction, Lambo went on: -When we were little... during the Arcobalenos' trials. When it seemed like Verde had you all blow up. I saw your ripped hat falling and... and I felt something. I felt like it was my own heart, the one falling. I was so shocked that I didn't even know where to start to avenge you. And then, little by little, I understood.- Reborn opened his mouth, but no words left it. His arm was still around Lambo's shoulders, which now were trembling like leaves shaken by a furious wind.
-But don't worry. I won't do anything. I can see by myself I'm not worthy of you, I would never be, not in a million years.
-Hey, weren't you the one who wanted to conquer the world?- Reborn asked, bursting out his thoughts before thinking about it.
-I was. I wish you never have a dream. When you find out it's impossible, it hurts like hell.
-For God's sake, Lambo...- Reborn began, without knowing what he was going to say, but Lambo interrupted him: -I'll go to Italy. I'll train with Levi as long as I need it. And then I'll come back here and I'll try to be worthy of my role. Would be about time.- Lambo lifted one hand, with fatigue for the lack of space, and wiped his cheeks as he could, snorting, then looked at Reborn and tried to put on a smile: -Thank you for not going away.
-You still are stupid.- Reborn answered, then he took his silken clutch out of his jacket's pocket and used it to gently pat Lambo's eyes, already puffed and reddened, circled by dark, deep shadows.
A tear billowed on Lambo's left eyelid, then it passed over it and broke against Reborn's clutch, darkening it and wetting the killer's fingers. He felt a jump in his chest and for the first time in his life he felt like a failure: he wanted to console him, and he was only managing to make him feel worse. He saw him lean back and refuse his goofy caress: -Go away, Reborn, you're hurting me.- Lambo said in a dull tone, then he pushed him away with shaking hands. Reborn, already unsteady on the doorstep of the playhouse, fell outside.
-What if I don't want to?- he asked, combative, fixing his fedora.
-Then shoot me and put an end to this!- Lambo answered. A bolt of electricity walked on his skin, and Reborn felt his hairs stiffening for the static; he understood that Lambo was on the verge of losing control of his Flames, as it usually happened when he was desperate.
-What if I don't want to do this, either?- Reborn replied, then he leaned forward. Walking on all his fours he went over Lambo, and a shiver in his lower belly welcomed the brushing of his muscular thigh between his. He ignored it, as he ignored the shock he got when his lips touched Lambo's. He imposed himself firmly but carefully, as he was conducting an important mission, and opened Lambo's lips with his tongue.
He felt him shake and answer the kiss, hesitating at first, then more and more sure, fierce, almost voracious, and for once he let the feelings guide him; when Lambo's hands gently caressed his waist he pressed himself against him, pushing forward as he wanted a deeper contact. He circled his neck with his arms and shoved a hand beneath his locks, finding there a warm, comfortable nest.
Then, a sudden crack; Reborn moved away and hit his head on the playhouse's roof, his hand to his gun. Lambo was surrounded by green Flames and electric bolts. The noise had come from a wooden knot exploding, expanded by the heat caused by Lambo.
-Go out, Reborn. Now.- Lambo said, and for once the killer didn't dare to differ. Lambo squeezed himself in the playhouse, got on his knees and slammed his hands on the floor, then he took a deep breath and released his Flames; the playhouse exploded with a wooden crack and Reborn lifted an arm to protect his face from the sharp splinters.
-The wood is a natural insulator- Lambo said. He was short of breath and pale.
-Nice move.- Reborn said, then he swallowed. He got up and gave a hand to Lambo to help him get back on his feet. When they were face to face he said: -You'll go to Italy. Listen carefully to Levi, he's an expert. If something's wrong, tell Lussuria: he's a strange dude, but he is good at listening, he's not an arrogant prick like the others. But don't you ever get into his room, trust me. We'll talk about this all when you'll be able to control your Flames.
-Will you... will you wait for me?
-I'll wait for you. And now, let's go home before Tsuna sends a research squad behind us.- Reborn hesitated, then he caressed Lambo's cheek with the back of a hand. He smiled, and a tiny shock of static cracked.
-I adore them, you know? Those dimples.- Reborn said, then he turned around and headed home.