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Pranks and Pretty Boys

Summary:

As he cleared the tree line, he heard Keith yell one more time at his back.

“Don’t expect me to come running if you get in trouble!”

Oh, that asshole. Lance would show him.

“Kogane’s gonna come running like there’s a fire licking at his ass,” he muttered to himself as he made his way further into the thick forest.

***

Lance tries to play a prank. He gets somewhat mixed results.

Notes:

Here's (a slightly edited version with an alternate ending of) a cute little one shot that I posted on Tumblr a while ago to tide you over while I write some more stuff for my ongoing multi-chaps!

It’s based off of this post on Tumblr :)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

“This is so boring!”

“Lance, you know we have to--”

Boring.”

“How many times do you want me to say it? We’re not doing anything until Pidge’s recon info syncs with our lions.”

“Sure, but could it load any slower? I’m gonna die of boredom here, buddy!”

“Dying of boredom my ass! I’m going to die due to exposure to your bullshit!”

“Oh yeah? Well… I’m going to die even more than you because you’re more full of bullshit than I am!”

“...What?”

Stupid Keith. Stupid planet. Stupid Pidge and her unnecessarily gigantic data file that was taking hours to download. Stupid Hunk and Shiro for being busy doing the exact same thing he and Keith were doing on the other side of the galaxy. Stupid Allura and Coran for being busy repairing the Castle Ship.

They’d been sitting in this clearing for at least two hours. Even Blue was bored -- she had long since given up on standing proudly with her particle barrier at the ready and was now laying on her side like the giant metallic house cat that she was.

Lance totally understood where she was coming from, though. Keith was a terrible partner. He insisted on waiting for Pidge’s info in silence, in the clearing they had landed in. No exploring. No singing. No dancing. No sparring. No making out, and that was the real loss in Lance’s opinion.

Lance just knew that Hunk and Shiro were having an awesome bro-bonding sesh on another planet that was vaguely similar to the one he and Keith were on. They were probably reminiscing about the good old days at the Garrison or something.

When Lance had brought up the Garrison to Keith, he ended up with a knife nearly missing his face and burying itself in the space tree behind him. Thus the current silence that Lance had only just broken.

“Whatever, man. I’m going. You can just stay here and enjoy your silence.”

“I will, thank you.”

“You’re very welcome,” Lance crowed, standing and stretching with gusto. “Now if you'll excuse me, adventure awaits!”

As he cleared the tree line, he heard Keith yell one more time at his back.

“Don’t expect me to come running if you get in trouble!”

Oh, that asshole. Lance would show him.

“Kogane’s gonna come running like there’s a fire licking at his ass,” he muttered to himself as he made his way further into the thick forest.

The trees on this planet were huge, with trunks at least ten times the size of the palm trees around his home in Cuba, but they looked more like oaks. Giant, pink oak trees.

Lance walked along, making quiet conversation with Blue in his mind as he kicked through piles of pink leaves. Blue was in a good mood, but only because she derived pleasure from watching Lance suffer. Sadist.

At least she fully supported his plan to get back at Keith for being such a party-pooping jerk. Step one was finding a cool location, which happened to be the hollow green log that Lance had stumbled upon while trying to find a way across a shallow stream.

At least the part of Pidge’s data that said the water on this planet was acidic had loaded before he left. The stream looked totally normal to Lance and he would have gladly jumped right in otherwise.

“Alright, check this out, Blue!” Lance said cheerfully, wriggling into the log and making sure he was just far enough in that his body was obscured by shadows.

When he was properly situated, he yelled as loud and dramatically as he could, calling upon experience from years of playing pranks on his siblings.

And then he waited.

***

Keith was worried. How could he not be? They were on a mission, which they were supposed to be taking seriously, and Lance had just up and fucked off into the woods!

Admittedly, Keith was typically the reckless one. He got impatient and ran off ahead of the others, and he usually paid the price in blood. Now that the tables had turned, he regretted any time he had ever put Lance in a situation like this.

On the other hand, their petty rivalry was preventing him from going after Lance to make sure he stayed safe. He knew he’d be in for endless teasing if he chased after the Blue Paladin. Besides, he trusted Lance to take care of himself. They were all paladins, after all. They were all defenders of the universe.

So far they only had basic info about the planet’s atmosphere and elemental make-up. Nothing on the local flora and fauna or alien lifeforms. What if Lance got killed by a space hippo? Or stabbed by space cactus? Or caught in an alien trap?

It wasn’t supposed to be a hostile planet, but that wouldn’t stop him from worrying. They were just here to gather various crystals and minerals that happened to be found here. Shiro and Hunk were looking for more materials on a different planet.

Keith forgot which things they were looking for, exactly, but he knew some of the stuff was for Hunk’s latest recipe so he could dazzle the Coalition with fancy food that doubled as a diplomatic gesture. And some other stuff was to help repair the Castle. Keith also knew that he would have to wait approximately another half-varga for Pidge’s gigantic file to download so he would know where to go and what to collect.

Lance had only been gone for about ten doboshes, without his helmet or bayard or anything. And Keith had just let him go.

“God, he’s infuriating,” he ground out, kicking at the cotton-candy colored grass.

Red’s laughter echoed throughout his brain, and Keith frowned. Red had recently learned to take a joke much better, which he suspected was due to increased exposure to Blue. Of course, that was because it seemed like the entire team had made a silent agreement at some point that Keith and Lance should be partners for every single goddamned mission.

Keith would never admit that he didn’t actually mind. He got enough shit from Red as it was. He didn’t want to hear anything from the rest of Voltron. He certainly didn’t want to hear anything from Lance.

A distant shout broke through the pleasant silence of the planet, interrupting Keith’s train of thought and causing him to sit up abruptly. The sound had come from the direction that Lance had gone off in.

Nope. Lance could take care of himself. He’s the best shooter on the team, and Keith’s seen him sweet-talk his way out of at least ten fights. He’s probably just doing something really… fun.

Except now Keith couldn’t remember exactly how that shout had sounded. Was it really the sound of someone yelling with joy? Maybe it had sounded scared. Or hurt. Or full of terror.

Keith scrambled to his feet, panic seeping out of his mind and into Red’s. He grabbed his bayard and broke out into a sprint, trying to ignore the various horrifying and grotesque scenarios playing out in his head. Lance would be fine.

Or he wouldn’t. And it would be all Keith’s fault for being dumb and he could be dead and Keith never told him how much he really loved him.

There was another yell, closer than before. Keith followed a stream he had stumbled across further north until he got to a large log. He didn’t know where Lance was.

“Lance! Are you okay? Say something!”

The answering silence only served to amplify his worry. He turned slowly in a circle, ears straining for another yell, another sound, some proof that Lance wasn’t unconscious or dead or drowning in acidic water.

Then he heard a short huff. It sounded almost like… a hastily muffled laugh? His suspicions were confirmed when more aborted giggles poured out of the log he had stopped in front of.

As Keith watched, a familiar lanky body slowly emerged from the log, shaking with laughter all the while.

“You said you wouldn’t come for me!”

Keith stared at the Blue Paladin in silence, completely dumbfounded. He was fine, not a scratch on him. He was alive and the whole thing had been a joke and Keith had been so easily played.

“You said, and I quote, ‘don’t expect me to come running,’ but I called and here you are, five minutes later!” Lance said gleefully, a giant smile stretching across his face. “You must really love me, huh? I bet you--”

Keith decided to cut off Lance’s gloating by closing the distance between them and sealing their lips together. It was sweet, and even though it was the first time Keith had ever kissed Lance, it felt like home. It felt natural, like it was always something that was supposed to happen.

He pulled away for a moment to stare into the other boy’s happily amused eyes.

“Fuck you.”

“Aw, don’t be like that, Keithy! I know you only--”

More kissing was in order, obviously. Keith was going to make Lance pay for his dumbass little stunt. They were in the middle of a mission, goddamnit! And while that was a compelling argument for why Lance shouldn’t have played his prank, Keith chose to ignore that fact when it came to making out.

Lance’s lips tasted like heaven and Keith couldn’t get enough of them. They were softer than his own, and while Lance’s eyes had slid shut almost immediately, Keith’s were wide open, taking in the adorable sight of Lance’s brow furrowing in concentration.

Lance was clearly an experienced kisser, but that was okay. Keith was too. He had just allowed his own eyes to slide shut when he felt Lance’s dumb lips curling into his signature smirk. In retaliation, he bit at Lance’s bottom lip as he shoved his taller boy against a tree, adding some tongue to the mix.

“Never.”

Kiss.

“Do that.”

Kiss.

“Again.”

And now that Keith had said what he needed to say, he could direct his full and undivided attention to sucking Lance’s face off. Lance, who he had pinned to a tree so he could know exactly where he was. He wasn’t dying. He was right there, moaning into Keith’s mouth.

“Keith,” Lance eventually gasped, struggling to catch his breath and cheeks flushing a pretty pink. “There’s no way it’s not happening again if this is what I get for my trouble.”

Keith scowled, using all of his will-power to step away from Lance and make his point. The pout on Lance's beautiful face that he got in response told him the message was loud and clear.

“We need to get to the lions. Pidge’s info dump should be finished syncing by the time we get back.”

There was a moment of silence, and Keith openly stared at Lance as he straightened himself out, probably trying to get his heart rate back under control. He smirked, proud that he’d left the other so breathless and flustered. Lance finally looked up again, a fresh grin on his face and a playful twinkle in his eye.

“Roger that, Mullet. Race you!” Lance yelled, shoving a surprised Keith aside and zooming into the forest of giant pink trees.

As Keith tore after the cackling Blue Paladin without a second thought, he decided he was glad that some things between them would never change.

Notes:

Hehehe I don't write fluffy stuff often (and I have no idea how to write make out scenes???) but it was a cute idea that I wanted to try out, anyway. Definitely a departure from my usual plot driven stuff. Oh also, if you're curious, the alternate ending is here. Personally, I prefer this version :)

I was considering doing a continuation fic of this with angst (obviously) where like, Lance yells for help and this time he really means it but Keith's like 'nah son I'm not falling for that bullshit again' so then WE, the lucky readers, get some whump. Ah, yes. Anyways, maybe that'll happen some day.

Currently, I'm struggling to come up with fills for ATLA Bingo and working on like, 10 other WIPS. Oops.

Yell at me on Tumblr! As always, I love you all xxxxx