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With some careful maneuvering and a lot of complaining from Thorne, they were able to move Cinder upstairs into one of the bedrooms. While no one liked taking a break from revolutionizing a whole country and taking down a lunar tyrant, even heroes needed rest and Cress was ready to collapse for a couple of days . It would likely only be a couple hours, but some sleep was better than no sleep.
Wordlessly, Cress, Jacin and Thorne split off into the many bedrooms of the second floor. She felt a little pathetic, being so tired after a day of just walking . Especially after Cinder had begun her day in a jail cell, attended her own trial by execution and then escaped a throne room of lunar soldiers, thaumaturges and the queen herself, only to fall into a lake and swim impossible distances with a metal leg. It was days like these that Cress marveled at the bravery of her friend and the insanity of Cinder's life. Then again, she was a cyborg-mechanic-lost-princess-of-the-moon.
Cress was just glad she was okay.
She took off her shoes and sat down on the bed. For the first time that day, she let all the worries of what they were doing pour down on her. Cinder may have survived this, but without her cyborg parts, how could she survive anything else? Iko assured them that she was fixable—but what if she wasn’t? How long could any of them count on luck to get them through this? Not to mention, if they failed, Levana wouldn’t hesitate to grant them the same trial and swift execution. Her heart squeezed to think of Thorne going through something like that. He wouldn’t last long, especially if he was cracking dumb jokes and sassing the queen.
Cress couldn’t let that happen. Thorne deserved to go down fighting or in his bed in the Rampion, after a long life of adventures.
It scared her how easily their futures could end. But it scared her more what life would be like if Levana continued to rule.
She was about to shuck off her Rampion-issued outfit, when a gentle knock sounded at the door.
Thorne poked his head in, looking almost sheepish and shy. It was such an odd look on him that Cress almost asked if he was injured.
But then his roguish charm returned with a heart-stopping grin. “Oh, don’t stop for me, darling.” He leaned suggestively against the doorframe.
Cress glared at him, her cheeks no doubt flaming red. “What is it, Captain?”
He dropped the act, moving forward to stand awkwardly in the middle of the room. “I um… just wanted to check you were alright.” He rubbed a hand nervously on the back of his neck. “You know, after we left you behind.”
“You didn’t leave me behind.” He didn’t look convinced. “I knew there wasn’t time for me to get through and it was important that you guys escape, especially—”
He cut her off, “But that doesn’t make me any less sorry.” He sighed and sat beside her on the bed. “Aces, Cress. I was worried sick about you.”
Her heart fluttered as he gazed at her, his blue eyes wide with concern.
“I was fine, Thorne,” she said quietly.
“Still… I wish I had been there for you.” His fingers found hers on the mattress. “I promise I won’t leave you again.”
Vaguely, Cress remembered an actor saying that to his beloved on one of her net-dramas. But this wasn’t… Thorne didn’t see her like that. He just saw her as someone who needed protecting.
And even though she had spent her whole life dreaming about a dashing prince coming to save her, it didn’t feel romantic now. Cress just felt weak and helpless. Cinder wouldn’t have needed protection. Or Scarlet. Or Iko.
Cress pulled her hand away and hugged her arms around her knees. “Thanks. I want to sleep now.” She ignored Thorne’s mildly offended expression.
Despite her request, he didn’t move.
“Are you sure you’re alright?”
“ Yes ,” she said, unable to keep the distress out of her voice. She hated feeling like this, cowardly and small.
“‘Cause you don’t seem—”
“I’m fine, Thorne, okay? I just…” She glanced at him. He hadn’t moved, waiting for the end of her sentence. She sighed. “I just don’t like being a burden. Everyone’s always trying to protect me because I can’t shoot a gun, or fight people with my bare hands, or—or—”
“Well, that’s a load of bullshit.”
Cress froze.
Thorne shifted his other leg on the bed so he was facing her. “Cress, this whole revolution wouldn’t be happening without you. Sure, you can’t shoot darts out of your finger or snap people’s necks, but—” He started counting with his fingers. “—you’ve kept every satellite and ship from noticing the Rampion for weeks , got us into New Beijing Palace, helped kidnap an emperor, got us out of those spaceports, sent that broadcast, and that’s just the beginning. Without you…”
For starters, Thorne would be in a jail cell, and the rest of them… she didn’t want to think about it.
“Without you, we’d be nowhere. So who cares if you need a little protecting? That’s what I’m here for.”
Her lips tugged upward gratefully. Thorne may have been an obnoxious flirt, but sometimes he said just the right thing.
“I think I should ask Cinder for a raise.”
Thorne laughed, a good hearty one that made it impossible for her not to grin along with him.
When their laughter died, Thorne squeezed her hand. He got up, as if to leave, but stalled at the door. “You’re sure you’ll be okay in here?”
Cress glanced around the room. It was a bit grand for her liking, with the large four-poster and a little sitting area in front of the window, but that was Lunars for you. She was partial to the Rampion anyway.
“I think so.”
“I should double-check the window.” He was across the room and feeling for a latch before she could argue. He found it and shoved against the window a few times, making sure it was well and truly locked.
“Thorne—”
“And the closet.” He disappeared into the small room and she could hear him rifling through clothes. Cress sighed.
She appreciated the gesture, really, but she’d also appreciate some sleep right now.
“Thorne! It’s okay,” she said, as he went to check the large wardrobe as well. “I don’t need protection while I sleep.”
He realized himself and stopped. “Sorry. Of course you don’t. I should let you rest.”
And yet he stayed rooted to the spot, staring at her as if he couldn’t quite believe she was here.
“Thorne?” she tried again.
“Right!” This time, he did leave, calling, “Good night, Cress,” over his shoulder.
His little show of chivalry didn’t do much to make her feel less helpless.
But he was right. It wasn’t so bad needing protection when she was doing things worth protecting. And if Thorne was the one protecting her? She didn’t mind that at all.
* * * *
Even though the clock told her she’d slept for a few hours, Cress was convinced that Iko’s wake up call was only minutes after she’d laid her head on the pillow. It was simultaneously the best sleep she’d had in months and the worst.
Maybe she could get just five more minutes in, she thought, rolling over to settle deeper into her blankets. That idea shattered however, when she realized there was someone else in the room.
She squeaked, sitting up quickly and nearly falling out of the bed.
A man was passed out in a chair, clothes rumpled, and it wasn’t till she saw the line of drooling trailing out of his open mouth that she realized it was Thorne.
“ Thorne? ” she said loudly, forgetting he was asleep.
He instantly woke up and scrambled into a fighting stance, scanning the room for threats.
“Cress! What—”
“What are you doing here?!”
“What am I—oh.” His arms fell sheepishly to his sides. “I—I just meant to check if you were safe and then I guess I… fell asleep?”
His questioning tone and the blanket pooled around his feet didn’t convince her.
“You slept in here?” she whispered.
The statement blanketed the room in an awkwardness she wasn’t prepared for. There weren’t any immediate threats in this bedroom besides Thorne himself. She didn’t need protecting and yet he was here, looking confused and a bit… embarrassed?
“I didn’t sleep well while you were… gone. And last night… I guess knowing you were safe wasn’t as believable as seeing it for myself.”
Cress could hardly believe the words were coming out of his mouth. Thorne wasn’t meant to be sincere. He wasn’t meant to say things like that when his feelings only extended to friendship. He’d been weird ever since she returned and Cress couldn’t help wondering if something had changed for him.
But she couldn’t let herself hope. They were friends. That was all.
“Right. Thank you… I guess.”
“Of course.”
They stared at each other. Thorne looked like he wanted to say something more.
“Cress!” Iko didn’t wait to bang open the door. “Have you seen—”
Iko took one look at Thorne, his ears already turning red, and instantly devolved into a fit of giggles. Thorne’s mouth fell open. “I guess you have seen him,” she cackled. She wiped an imaginary tear from her eye. “Oh, just wait till I tell…” Iko froze, a bit too robotically for Cress’s liking and scowled. “Scarlet’s not here is she. Or Kai. Cinder would work but she’s a bit busy, isn’t she?”
Thorne found some semblance of control over his mouth and started muttering gibberish. Cress had never seen him so flustered and she had no idea why.
“Horrible timing, Thorne, really,” Iko said, waving a hand at him as she departed the doorway.
“We didn’t—” Thorne started to chase after her, but stopped to plant a kiss on Cress’s cheek. “I’m so glad you’re back,” he whispered and then ran down the hallway.
“Aces she’s only sixteen, Iko! We didn’t…” His words trailed down the stairs and Cress didn’t catch the rest of it because Thorne had kissed her on the cheek. Admittedly it was a bit wet and he did have horrible timing, but darn it—that man could make Cress float like a butterfly.
He promised to never leave her again.
He told her she was worthy of protection, of his protection.
He’d fallen asleep at her side because he couldn’t sleep without knowing she was safe.
And he’d been flustered when Iko thought they were up to something and he’d kissed her on the cheek.
It was dangerous, making a list like this when he’d only ever promised his friendship, but Cress couldn’t help it.
She had fallen for Carswell Thorne so quickly that it was a bit laughable. But maybe, just maybe, there was the tiniest of chances that he had fallen for her too.