Archive of Our Own

The first time she met Catra, she was shocked that Adora was ever friends with someone so rude, obnoxious, and uncouth.

It was half a year ago, but she remembers it clearly. She and Adora encountered the feline in a coffee shop, and Glimmer had never felt the tension rise in a room so quickly. Adora’s face hardened into cold marble, but she acknowledged her old friend politely, albeit frigidly. Catra told her to fuck off with the niceties and called her a sell out. It wasn’t pretty.

Anyways, Glimmer doesn’t know the details, but apparently they settled whatever beef they had. Adora asked her and Bow to give Catra a second chance, and although Glimmer wasn’t ecstatic at the idea, of course she is willing to do anything for her best friend. From what Adora told her about their past, she has some pity for Catra, too.

To be honest, past Glimmer would have felt threatened, as if this new addition to the group was planning on stealing Adora away from her, but that is no longer the case, thank-you-very-much! She’s over petty jealousy, and she has plenty of love and friendship to go around.

… Well, she did.

Catra comes over to meet her at the apartment that she and Adora share, and it’s awkward as hell. At first, Glimmer thinks, Ok, she’s a little rough around the edges, but so was Adora at first.

Artsy people were often like this, right? Edgy and standoffish, with a tragic past to boot? Adora paints; Catra writes. Checks out. Bow does essentially the opposite, working hard towards an MA in First Ones History with a job repairing tech on the side. He’s always been absolute sweetest. Also checks out. Glimmer herself is also in grad school-- for magic studies, which is arguably science-- and she's already knows that she's nothing like Catra.

So Glimmer decides her personality evaluation test is flawless, and she chalks up Catra’s weird behavior up to that. 

She tries. She really, really tried to be nice. Yet for every polite question she asks, Catra only gives one or two words in response. For every interest Glimmer shares to try and find common ground, Catra comes up with a way to mock it. She even straight up rolls her eyes at Glimmer at some point. 

What the hell?! Aren’t writers supposed to be sensitive and empathetic? It turns out that they’re REALLY rude and REALLY annoying.

Minutes into their conversation, Glimmer is already fuming, her entire face a boiling red and steam nearly coming out of her ears.

How in the world is this person Adora's other best friend? Was she always this awful? Maybe it's not too late, maybe Glimmer can convince Adora to start distancing herself, because Glimmer is seriously struggling to find a single positive quality about Catra.

The first time she meets Glimmer, she wonders how Adora is friends with such an aggressively pink snob.

She hadn't seen Adora in years-- not since she moved away after they had their falling out. Not that she expected a warm welcome, but sheesh. The cold look that Adora gave pierced through her heart like a shard of ice, and it quickly froze any nostalgic emotion that had flooded back to her. The harsh words left Catra's lips before she could stop them, spewing forth as weapons, her automatic defense system triggering. The sparkly, pink haired girl that was with Adora yelled 'what is hell your problem?!' back at Catra. She said some quick insult back, but she was already on her way out the door by that point, asking herself, holy shit Catra what the fuck is wrong with you?!

A couple months of rethinking her life choices and a bunch of advice from Scorpia later, she decided to contact Adora. She swallowed her pride down with a shot of whiskey and guilt, and she... actually apologized. Crazy, right? Very uncharacteristic of her. But Catra's a more mature person now. Maybe. Probably. Hopefully. She wasn't sure. All the knew was that she wanted her best friend back, now that she had the chance.

She really was sorry for everything. For the way she acted when they had their last fight. For all the shitty things she said. For taking so long to apologize. She laid it all out there, and the unthinkable actually happened. Adora forgave her.

Just like that, Adora was back in her life, and everything felt... weird. Nostalgic but new, worrying but exciting. When Adora asks her to meet her friend group, she's reluctant, but she agrees. She wonders if Sparkles will be there.

Aand yep, she is. As soon as she starts talking, Catra remembers everything that she disliked about her.

From the get-go, Glimmer plasters on a wide, friendly smile that Catra absolutely hates. Why is she smiling at her like that when she doesn’t even know her? She doesn’t know Catra's personality or her interests or hobbies. Not to mention their terrible first encounter. Is it really enough that she's Adora’s friend? Is that all it takes to get her approval?

That’s ridiculous, and Catra hates the fact that her relationship with Adora precedes everything else about her. She didn't rekindle her friendship with Adora just to be stuck in her shadow again, and she vows to hate anyone trying to put her there.

While she’s at it, Catra goes out of her way to find other things she dislikes about Glimmer. It’s not hard, and she might as well start a list for when she needs to compile her insults and comebacks. For starters, Glimmer’s clothing is as obnoxious as her hair, nothing but boring pastels, and the glittery makeup is begging for attention. Her hoodie bears the crest of a prestigious private university that her parents probably pay the tuition for, and now it makes sense why their apartment is so nice. Ugh.

Ok, ok, there's one. Let’s acknowledge the elephant in the room before it gets weird and distracting. Catra is also really hot.

As soon as that intrusive thought is out of the way, she can stuff it as deep down as it’ll go and never bring it up again. It doesn’t change Glimmer’s opinion of her, anyways. She loves Adora dearly, but she's not sure how long she can pretend to like someone who's so set on acting like a toddler.

The only thing she’s got going for her is that cake. She hates Glimmer’s guts, but Catra’s got to give that one to her.

Maybe she would have been down to a one night stand type of deal, if Glimmer's personality wasn't so annoying-- although, there was something satisfying about putting a spoiled princess like that in her place. But that might make things weird with Adora, and Catra didn’t want to ruin things again. A friendship with Glimmer, however, was definitely not going to happen.

They’ll never get along. Some people are just too different.

They’ll never get along. Some people are just too different.

“You didn’t meet her, Bow! She’s the worst person that I’ve ever met!” Glimmer maintains. She groans and rolls over in her bed, burying her face into a pillow.

Bow picks up the hoodie that she threw to the floor and hangs it on a chair. "Really?" he challenges, "You met the First Ones language professor, and he's pretty awful."

Glimmer rolls back over to answer. "She's a thousand times worse than him. She bit me!"

"Hmmm, fair..."

She sits up and swings her legs over the edge of the bed. She looks at Bow, looks at the floor, and falls back with another groan. She's restless, and she hates that Catra has this effect on her. It's been an entire day, and Glimmer still can't get her stupid face out of her mind. It's infuriating.

She continues, "I don't understand how Adora is friends with some like her, and I don't understand how she expects us to be friends with her, too!"

"No one is going to force you to be, but... Adora's smart, and she has a good heart," Bow reminds her, sitting down on the mattress next to his distressed best friend. “Maybe you two can find something you have in common?"

“I tried! Bow, trust me, there's nothing."

"Well, from what you told me, you both sound kinda hot-headed..."

While still laying down, Glimmer grabs her pillow and flings it to the side, hitting him with it.

Bow just laughs. "It's cute! When it's not concerning," he teases her, and she pouts. “All I’m saying is that everyone deserves a second chance.”

Glimmer sighs as she sits back up. "This was the second chance, remember?" 

"True, but..." He reaches out, cups her face in his hand, and smiles at how round and squishy her cheeks look when she presses against his palm. The touch is gentle and tender, and she melts into it. "It's important to Adora. Plus, learning how to get along with people you don't like is a valuable life skill."

"You sound like my mom," she grumbles, but she sounds less irritated than before.

"Haha, I guess. It's the 'mom-friend' in me."

Glimmer's nose scrunches up, and he probably thinks that it's a reaction to him being right about the Catra thing.

Truth be told, she doesn't want to think of Bow as her mom-friend. He often plays that role, sure, but it feels weird to call him that, or anything close to familial. If he says that of himself... does that mean he really does think of himself that way? As a family member and not... however she thinks of him? Ugh.

"So you're going to talk to her again?"

"Fiiiine," Glimmer agrees.

Bow grins and puts an encouraging arm around her. "I'm sure it'll go better this time," he assures her.

She takes the opportunity to rest her head against shoulder, and he presses a chaste kiss on top of her hair. Her cheeks flush, but he probably can't see. Their relationship has always felt like a game of tug-of-war, except neither of them know which side they're on.

She wonders, if one day they stop playing... what will happen then?

“I just couldn’t stand the way she was looking at me!” Catra complains defensively. “She stared at me like I was some abandoned kitten drowning in a sewer. Like I was pathetic."

Adora sighs. She lays beside of Catra, and both of them are chilling on the slanted roof of the feline's new apartment. When they were kids, they would always sneak onto rooftops and talk about their problems together. All these years later, it still feels like their ritual.

"She didn’t mean it in that way! She just wanted to make you feel welcomed,” Adora insists. "... Although it also might be because she, uh... knows about how shitty our childhood was. I told her about it a few months ago."

"You what? "

"She’s one of my closest friends! It was going to come up eventually,” she defends herself.

Catra can’t relate. Despite not talking to her for five years, Adora is the closest friend she’s ever had. She reinforced the walls after their falling out, rebuilding them out of steel and concrete, determined to never let anyone else break her heart again.

“Some of it wasn’t your story to tell,” she hisses.

Adora is silent for a moment before she says, “... You’re right about that. I’m sorry.”

"… It's fine. Past is the past and whatever," Catra mumbles. She doesn't want to talk anymore, and to say so, she rolls over and presses herself against Adora's side. Strong arms curl around her.

They fell back into intimacy so quickly after they made up, as if picking up right where they let off. The touch of Adora's skin never stopped being familiar. It's immediately comforting.

"She... isn't the kind of person I expected you to be friends with, I guess," Catra confesses, now that her face is hidden away in Adora's shoulder. "We used to hate people like that."

"You used to hate everyone, Catra. Except meee~" Adora teases her, using a sing-song voice. She ruffles Catra's hair. "How embarrassing for you."

"Oh my god, shut up."

"Still won't admit that you like me?"

"Are you trying to get pushed off this roof?"

In a quick motion, Adora swings her body over Catra's, knees at her hips and hands on her shoulders, and she pins her down. "You wanna try?" she challenges with a grin, though she knows she's already won.

Catra's face goes beet-red. She half-heartedly tries to wiggle away. She asks, "If I say I like you, will you get off already?"

"No," Adora answers, "But I will if you promise to give Glimmer another chance?"

"Ugh. Fine," the stubborn catgirl relents.

Adora let out a cheer, laughs, and rolls onto her back again.

Just like that, the moment ends. Catra's heart still beats fast.

They've danced along this fine line as long as she can remember, waltzing between reality and the 'what if's'. Occasionally, they'll miss a step, and they stumble, leaving Catra a muddled mess of cherried cheeks and dangerous hope.

She wonders if Adora even hears the music playing.

The words she hasn't said yet taste bitter at the back of her throat. She knows that saying them would change everything.

She will one day. Maybe. If it's the end of the world.

The words she hasn't said yet taste bitter at the back of her throat. She knows that saying them would change everything.

She will one day. Maybe. If it's the end of the world.

Sometimes, she can't stand being alone. 

Her bed is too empty, and her thoughts are too loud.

She wonders what it is about trying to sleep that forces you to remember every reckless mistake and every selfish decision you've ever made.

During the day, she builds herself up. No crippling insecurity here, sorry, no idea what you're talking about. Then night falls, and the moon see right through it all. It washes in the truth with the tide, and her hubris crumbles like a sandcastle. She lays motionless in her bed, letting the waves crash against her. Regret tastes briny and pathetic.

She knows that as you go further underwater, the pressure increases. She wants to be more than than what everyone is expecting of her. She doesn't even realize when she swims downward.

She waits for his hand to reach out to her, to pull her back up again. She thinks about texting him. But it's late, and she has an early class in the morning, so she doesn't.

So she just floats and lays awake and tries not to drown.

Sometimes, she can't stand being alone.

Her bed is too empty, and her thoughts are too loud.

She wonders what it is about trying to sleep that forces you to remember every reckless mistake and every selfish decision you've ever made.

During the day, she builds herself up. No crippling insecurity here, sorry, no idea what you're talking about. Then night falls, and the moon see right through it all. It washes in the truth with the tide, and her hubris crumbles like a sandcastle. She lays motionless in her bed, letting the waves crash against her. Regret tastes briny and pathetic.

She knows that as you go further underwater, the pressure increases. She wants to be more than than what everyone is expecting of her. She doesn't even realize when she swims downward.

She waits for her hand to reach out to her, to pull her back up again. She thinks about texting her. But it's late, and she has a meeting with a client in the morning, so she doesn't.

So she just floats and lays awake and tries not to drown.

Glimmer is frozen. The spoon falls from her hand and splatters bits of batter onto the floor. This can't really be happening. Holy shit. Her stomach flips, maybe in a not-bad way, she honestly isn't sure yet, and she can't even form a coherent thought, other than noticing how surprisingly soft Catra's lips are.

Catra start to move away, and Glimmer immediately decides that won't do. Before she gets too far, Glimmer darts forward, crashing their lips together once more. 

Just like that, they're kissing each other desperately, as if answering each other's questions of you, too?  Their kisses are fiercer now, frantic and needy and hungry, and Glimmer is dizzy with the intensity of it. She isn't thinking about regret at all, although maybe she should be. She's overwhelmed by the want, so flooded with the feeling that she barely even processes the weight of what's going on.

Before she knows it, she's pressed against the kitchen counter. Their bodies press together closely, and Glimmer wraps her arms behind Catra's neck. The feline's hands slide up, and a shiver runs up her spine at the touch. Catra lifts Glimmer onto the crowded counter, and something that neither of them can be bothered to identify falls to the floor. Glimmer clutches Catra's hair, and the feline growls against her lips. Catra's hand is moving further up her thigh, and she stops to drags her nails lightly down it.

Everything feels like a whirlwind, moving almost too fast for Glimmer to keep up, yet at the same time not fast enough. Glimmer wonders if this is too much already, or if it would be too much to ask Catra to keep moving her hand up--

Catra tastes the cake batter on her tongue, sweet and sticky. It's nice, Catra thinks, before she starts panicking.

Glimmer doesn't move at all at first, and fear washes over Catra as she realizes, fuck. Another regret to add to the list, she always had to go and fuck things up like this, always has to ruin every relationship she has, even if this wasn't her usually way of doing it, she must have a misread a sign somewhere, how could she be so impulsive and naive, god she is so fucking stupid--

She starts to pulls back, but she doesn't even make it two inches away before Glimmer presses forward, locking their lips together again.

Catra feels the spark in her gut catching aflame. She grabs Glimmer's hips roughly, pushing her against the counter, but Glimmer bites at her lip with equal aggression.  She slides her hands up to her waist and hoists her up onto the granite counter top, still kissing her back all the while.

Glimmer's thighs are soft, warm, and bare, thanks to the skirt she's wearing beneath her apron. Catra stands in between them, each leg pressed against the side of her hips. One hand stays on Glimmer's waist, and the other slides beneath her skirt. where the skin burns like a stovetop.

It's all fire, every kiss an inferno, every breathy exhale like smoke, all apprehension extinguished long before. She wonders how Glimmer's burning skin would feel against her lips, if she kissed her neck, her body, along her inner thigh, would that be too much or--

Beeeeeeeeeep.

At the sound of the timer going off, she breaks away.

She stares at the girl between her legs, who has flour in her messy hair and fear in her wide, mismatched eyes.

Glimmer hops down.

Right on time, her phone buzzes. It's a text from Bow, asking if Adora prefers red or gold balloons.

Oh.

They avoid eye contact for the rest of the night.

Beeeeeeeeeep.

At the sound of the timer going off, she breaks away. 

She stares at the girl sitting inches away, who has her supple mouth hanging open, both breathless and shocked.

Catra steps away.

She grabs an oven mitt, opens the door, and inspects the cake. The one they made for Adora.

Oh.

They avoid eye contact for the rest of the night.

"FUCK!" Glimmer yells when she falls off the track yet again. She's just rusty, ok? She takes the opportunity to put down her controller and drink more of her cider, as per the game's rules-- finish your drink before you finish the race, but no "drinking and driving." In the end, Bow ends up winning, and Glimmer accuses him of practicing without her recently.

"... Best out of seven?" she proposes, as every sore loser does.

Bow laughs and shakes his head. "We're out of things to drink, and it's getting late."

"It's ok, I understand. You don't want to play me now that I'm warmed up. That's fair."

"Sure, sure. C'mon, help me clean up," Bow says to her as he starts picking up the empty cans. Glimmer humphs in response. She'd rather put it off until the morning, but she doesn't want Bow's goodwill to go to waste, so she gets up and does the same. 

After everything has been rinsed and throwing into the recycling bin, Bow stretches back out onto the couch, and he lets out a yawn.

"You can spend the night if you want," Glimmer offers as she walks back over. He's always welcome to, but he normally doesn't without the direct invitation. She wouldn't mind if he spent every night with her, and she's almost drunk enough to tell him that-- but not quite.

"Hmm," he considers. "Sure, if you don't mind."

The alcohol is making her feel more bold, and when she's back to the couch, she sits back down in his lap, legs hanging off to one side.

He doesn't protest, so Glimmer presses her side snugly against his chest. "I don't. Plus, it's been a while."

"Y-yeah," he notes. Glimmer notices his breath hitch. He shifts around a bit, maybe uncomfortably.

She asks him, "Is this ok?"

"Yes! Yes, it's ok," he quickly responds, sounding... nervous, maybe?

Glimmer thinks that he doesn't sound too sure about it, so she slides off anyways and sits beside of him instead. "Er, sorry," she apologizes, just in case.

"No, I-- sorry, it's not you, it's-- ..." Bow covers his flushed face with his hand, and he lets out a sigh. "Nevermind. I think I'm just drunk. We should get some sleep."

Glimmer wants to press further, but she lets it go. They both are really tired. She teleports them to her room, and they fall lazily into bed.

Bow lays on his side. He rests his arm along her waist, and he holds her gently. She welcomes the touch, but she wonders if he's just trying to make up for the awkward moment before.

"Do you want to change?" she asks. He sleeps over often enough that he keeps a set of pajamas at their place.

"Sure, give me a few minutes," he requests with another yawn.

A few minutes later, however, he's out.

Glimmer doesn't move or teleport away, not wanting to wake him. She snuggles closer and closes her eyes, but she can tell that sleep isn't coming anytime soon.

Normally she does sleep easily when Bow is around. His presence is calming, and it usually helps to clear any anxieties away. But apparently not when her mind is consumed with thoughts of soft lips against her neck and claws digging into her back.

"Do you always paint when you're drunk?" Catra accuses her.

"When the inshpiration hits... you gotta take it!" Adora proclaims. She nods all-knowingly, though Catra's back is turned to her.

The feline sits backwards on a chair in the middle of Adora's room. Her shirt is off and she's holding it against her chest to maintain some dignity, but otherwise her torso is completely bare. No, it's not for the reason she would prefer.

Adora asked her paint something on her back, and she played the 'it's my birthdaaay' card when Catra protested. She didn't have to, honestly. Catra would do almost anything to see her smile, even if she pretended otherwise.

The drunk artist brushes more paint onto her exposed back. It feels wet and cool on her skin. Catra isn't even sure if it's non-toxic, but it sounded like a hypocritical thing to worry about with the alcohol in her system, so fuck it.

"Aaaaand done!" Adora announces. She grabs her phone, takes a picture of Catra's back, and holds it over her shoulder for her to see.

Her finished painting is something like an abstract galaxy. Swirls of dark purples and blues make up the negative space, and splatters of white align to make messy constellations. It's pretty, Catra thinks.

"... It's cool that you still do stuff like this," Catra comments. "Y'know. Still do art because you like doing it."

"I'm juhst a sellout to pay the bills," Adora jokes, her words still a bit slurred. Catra is in the same boat now, forced to take a stable but boring job when everything else had failed. It make her "sellout" insult from a few months ago ironic.

"You don't write anymore?" Adora questions.

Catra shrugs and answers, "Sometimes. Not really."

"Show meeeeeee," the blonde demands.

"I will in the morning," the catgirl agrees, but only because she doesn't expect Adora to remember any of this in the morning.

"Doesh that mean you're staying over?"

Catra hesitates. Does it? It wouldn't be the first time they shared a bed, but... it had been a while, to say the least. She actually still remembers the last time they slept beside of each other. She couldn't sleep, and she spent hours just staring at Adora's face, as cheesy as it sounded. Sometimes, she wonders if Adora even knew how pretty she is.

"Um... sure, if you want me to," she says, cautiously.

"Yaaay, sleeeeepoverrrrr!" Adora cheers, throwing her hands up in the air.

The paint dries quickly, so Catra doesn't bother to go wash it off. She'll find out in the morning if putting it directly onto skin was a bad idea. She just tugs her t-shirt back on and borrows some shorts from Adora, and she climbs into bed.

Adora flops down beside of her, wiggling closer enough to Catra to make her turn red again. "Tell me a secret! Like we used to during sleepovers."

"Hmm..." Eh, fuck it. She probably won't remember. "I made out with Glimmer today,"

She laughs and shoves Catra's shoulder."You wish! Tell me a realll secret."

While the feline takes her time thinking of another one, Adora starts snoring. Likely a good thing.

Catra lays awake, still thinking about all the things she could have said just then. Still thinking about the day itself. Still thinking about that dumb sparkly girl.

She grabs her phone, and she navigates to Catra's text thread.

She tells herself that reaching out is the mature thing to do, but she knows that she really just wants to talk to her. And she isn't really sobered up yet.

So she sends:

Are you awake?

Her phone buzzes, and she almost doesn't bother picking it up. She does wonder who the hell could be bothering her at this hour, though, and she checks it to find out. 

... Damn, talk about coincidence. Could she sense Catra was thinking about her or something?

She doesn't see a reason not to respond, so she does:

yeah. whats up?

The response comes back quickly, and Glimmer's chest pounds. She sends back:

Just wondering. Do you want to talk about what happened?

Catra considers this. She sends her decision:

not really

She wonders if she should push back on it. The healthy thing to do is to talk everything out, right? Granted, maybe not while they're both kinda drunk-- buuut then again, won't that make them more likely to tell the truth?

... Actually, nevermind, bad idea all around. Glimmer isn't even she if she knows her own truth.

She agrees and replies:

Ok. Same, honestly.

Great. Maybe this means they can put all of this behind them. They can go back to being just friends, and they can pretend like their hot makeout session never existed. Their friends won't hate them; their emotions won't be a mess; and everything will go back to normal. Easy-peasy. The right decision here is to move on.

Except she's never been good at making good decisions.

Great. Maybe this means they can put all of this behind them. They can go back to being just friends, and they can pretend like their hot makeout session never existed. Their friends won't hate them; their emotions won't be a mess; and everything will go back to normal. Easy-peasy. The right decision here is to move on.

Except she's never been good at making good decisions.

Catra knows she should just send a 'k, goodnight'  and be done with it.

Instead, she remembers the fire, how it was unlike anything she's ever experienced before, how Glimmer's kiss has burnt itself permanently into her memory, how it's all she's been able to think about all day.

Ignoring rational thought, Catra sends:

do you want to come over tomorrow?

Sure.

"Why? Why did all twelve of them have to be so successful?" Bow groans. "Like, statistically, at least one of us is going to be a fuck-up, right? What if it's me?"

Glimmer turns on the couch to face him, and she reaches behind to gives his shoulder a squeeze, rubbing small circles into his back. They both ended up procrastinating on their reading to throw Adora's party, so now they are cramming information together before tomorrow's seminars. 

"You're spiraling," she tells him. "There's nothing you could do that could make you a fuck-up. I know you feel a lot of pressure, being compared to your siblings, but you're Bow! You're the most amazing person I know, and you're going to do amazing things, ok?"

"When did you get so good at pep talks?"

"I learned from the best!" She winks.

He smiles softly back at her. "Anyways, you're right about the spiraling. I think I just need a break."

She nods in agreement, and they both set a small reading goal to finish before taking a breather.

But how can she focus on reading about spell techniques when Bow looks so cute in his reading glasses? Or when her heart flutters every time she catches him looking at her? Or when she's wondering how someone so cute and sweet and perfect exists at all?

Everything feels different, now that she's sure of herself. She's isn't confused anymore. She knows what she wanted. She wants to just tell him.

She was going to hold off on the whole "I love you" confession until later, but she's rethinking it now. She knows she loves him more than anything, and all she wants to do is say it.

Don't be a coward; nothing's ever going to happen if you're afraid, Catra told her-- hypocritically, but she was right.

She doesn't need to make a show of it. She doesn't need the moment to be atmospheric and dreamy and perfect. Any moment with him is perfect enough. So fuck it.

"Hey, Bow?" she says.

"Hm?" he responds. He doesn't look up from laptop that he's typing notes on, but she knows he's listening.

"I love you."

He immediately stops and looks over at her, his eyes wide. She watches the confusion flash across his face, and she knows he's wondering how she meant it, whether it's platonic or not. She's happy to make it clear.

"I love you," she repeats, her heart bursting with so much love for him that it might explode, like fireworks going off in her chest. She reaches across the table, takes his hand in hers, and squeezes it. "I'm in love with you."

He looks completely shocked, which is expected. But along with overwhelming love she feels, she's also scared. She waits for his reaction, whatever it'll be. She's prepared for it. If he doesn't feel the same way, that's ok. She already made her peace with that possible outcome.

"Glimmer..." he finally says. She's never heard him say her name like that before, like it's something delicate and magical. 

He slides the laptop off to the side, and he turns to face her fully. He takes her hand, the one already in his, and he brings it to his lips. He kisses her palm, gingerly, tenderly. The touch is soft and light, but it makes her heart pound.

He looks up, and tells her, "I love you, too."

She's never felt so much relief and love and happiness wash over her all at once. It's real; this is happening. She loves him, so so so much, and he loves her back. She doesn't realize she's crying until he reaches forward to wipe away a tear that trickles down her cheek.

She throws her arms around him, and he rubs her back as she sniffles away. "T-this is the happiest moment of my life, and I'm a complete mess, ha!" she manages to laugh about it. She pulled back and wipes her eyes with her the back of her hand.

When he meets her eyes again, he's looking at her so intensely that it almost makes her want to laugh. She's never seen him look at her like this, either. It's giving her goosebumps, but she can't look away. She wonders if this is the same face that he was making during the moments when she'd look at him and he'd look quickly somewhere else. She swallows nervously.

"You're not a mess. You're perfect," he says, his eyes never leaving hers.

He's closer now. Her gaze flickers down to his lips.

She decides he's moving too slowly, and she closes the space between them herself.

Catra reminds her, "You probably don't remember this, but the night of your party I told you that I would show you some of my writing..."

She hands Adora a small booklet of poems, made up of single pages that were torn from her poetry notebook and bound together with some string. "So, here."

"You're right, I don't remember-- but great! I'd love to see them." Adora takes the gift and leans against the wall to find a good reading position, sitting cross-legged in her bed. She start looking over the first page.

Catra looks away as she tells her, "So, I should mention that I, uh... I wrote all of these for you. The first one is from ten years ago. It’s shit, I know, so you can laugh at that one.”

"Whoa, really? You never told me! That's so sweet!" her friend-but-hopefully-not-just-a-friend-for-long says as she grins over at her. She's apparently oblivious to the implication there. Whatever, that's fine, the poems themselves will the message across. That's the plan, anyways.

Catra just shrugs and silently panics and tries convince herself that this isn't the worst decision she's ever made. There's a fucking documented decade of her pining pathetically after her best friend, and she just handed her the proof of it like it was nothing. Holy shit, how is she actually going through with this?

You have to tell her what you want, or she'll never know. Glimmer told her-- hypocritically, but she was right.

Adora is halfway though the stack when she throws in a comment, “Aww, these are so cute! Pretty cheesy though. I didn't know you liked my eyes so much! They're like constellations, huh?”

Catra groans. Is she being serious right now? “They’re love poems, you idiot, they’re supposed to be cheesy!” she yells, before she realizes it.

Adora looks up from the booklet, her eyes wide. “Wait, they’re what?”

Aaand there's her cue to disappear. Catra rolls over in the bed, grabs a pillow, and covers her face with it. From underneath, her muffled voice says, "Shut up, I know you heard me."

"I mean, I heard you yeah, but..." Adora pauses pulls the pillow away. Catra's entire face is scarlet red and scrunched up, and she looks like she might neither scream or cry. "You... used to write love poems about me?"

Maybe this is an out, Catra thinks. She's always looking for an escape plan. She can just say, Haha, yeah I used to. I had a crush on you when we were kids, but don't worry, not anymore! Knowing Adora, she would accept that as the truth, and she wouldn't press further.

But Catra knows that she'll never forgive herself if she does that.

"... The last one from is from a week ago," she admits. With the pillow taken away, she covers her face with her hands instead.

Somehow, Adora still seems confused. Either that, or she is doing some kind of mental gymnastics to find another explanation as to why this blushing girl is writing love poems about her. "Wait... What does that... mean, exactly?" she questions further.

"Oh my god, do I really have to spell it out for you?" Catra complains. Is this really happening right now? She knows her hands are doing nothing to hide how flustered she is, but she keeps them there anyways.

She wants to say it. She really does. But she's so, so scared. She knows that Adora wouldn't make things weird between them or anything like that, if the feelings weren't mutual. Catra knows could handle the heartbreak, if it came down to it; it wouldn't be the first time. But it still would fucking suck to deal with.

Here goes nothing.

"I love you! Ok?!" Catra yells. "I... I've always loved you!"

The words finally leave her throat, and the next breath she takes feels as if it's the first one she's had in years. There it goes, finally. She feels full of relief and love, yet at the same time, she feels like she's breaking apart. She doesn't see Adora's reaction, since she still has her face covered. She isn't sure if she wants to. She prepares for the worst.

Adora grabs both her hands and holds them in her own. She gently pulls them away from Catra's face, and the feline doesn't resist. She's an emotional, tearful, vulnerable mess, but Adora isn't looking at her with pity. It's something strange and sincere and earnest. Catra swallows nervously.

"... I love you, too, Catra," Adora says, and for a moment, the world stops.

Catra reaches out to touch the side of her face, as if to check that she's still real. She is, thank the stars. Adora loves her back, and it's all completely real. Catra smiles up at her.

Adora leans down, gradually, cautiously, her own face a timid pink.

Catra slides her hand behind Adora's neck, and pulls her closer.