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Windy Thoughts

Summary:

Emile gets home from another day of therapy, but everything feels as if it might be crashing around him.

Work Text:

The rumble of the car in his driveway around Emile let his mind drift, delving himself into a daydream about an Avatar Steven Universe crossover that he only escaped out of after something splattered the wind shield. Bird poop.

Emile straightened his glasses, having reacted to the bird poop by nearly knocking them off. Blinking at the clock, Emile realized he had been sitting in a running car for 20 minutes, wasting the battery as he could’ve gone inside at any time.

Emile looked back at the bird poop, knowing the earlier he removed it the easier it would be. However, his body just felt... heavy, like he was laden with a bunch of bricks. But instead of caving into the feel on his body and staying in his running car for a dozen more minutes, he turned the key, feeling the car power off, the rumble fading away til all that was left was cool silence.

Thankfully, Emile did not appreciate the ever increasing cold, so he finally gathered up the mental strength to push himself out of his car. Releasing the seal of door, a rush of cold air swooped in, gratefully further motivating Emile to step out towards his front door.

It seems like he might be a little immature, don’t you think?

Emile shook his head, dispelling the random thought. Instead, Emile focused on finding a cloth and a cleaning spray in the glovebox on the passenger’s side of the car. The sound of the spray of the bottle gratefully filled Emile’s senses, the work of the scrub motion to remove the poop from the windshield calming and comfortable.

When that was done, Emile replaced the spray bottle but kept the cloth, as he needed to wash the cloth as cleaning the windshield was not it’s only use. Emile again caught himself as he realized he’d just been staring at the cloth for a solid minute or two, coming back to reality when a chilly gust of wind caused him to shiver.

Letting the hand holding the cloth drop into a normal position, Emile turned, giving a quick glance to the very early sunset, as it was not even 6:30pm. The glance didn’t allow his mind to wander anymore, then stepping quickly towards his front door. 

Emile’s hand was gripping the door knob, desperately turning it for a long few moments when Emile realized he had yet to unlock the door. Even though no one was around, he felt his cheeks grow red in embarrassment as went to get his keys... finding them nowhere to be found.

Emile panicked for a moment before he mentally back tracked what he was just doing, realizing he did not remember ever taking the keys out of the ignition or locking his car. Going back to his car, he felt another memory bubble to the surface.

I can solve my own problems. Plus I wouldn’t even be here if I wasn’t being forced.

Emile winced, nearly dropping his keys as he took them from the ignition. He felt something on his face, finding when he went to wipe it away that is strangely felt like a water droplet of rain. Looking at the relatively clear sky, Emile was at a loss on how it got there.

Finally at his door with his keys, he satisfied himself with the sharp sound of the mechanisms in the door unlocking, smiling just a little as he turned the knob, pushing the door open.

Hearing the distant but familiar sounds of a far off squabbling of excitement, Emile made a beeline for an enclosed area, seeing his ferrets excitedly scrambling at the bars of the little fence he had in the doorway.

“Pearl, Riley, calm down, I’m home, I’m home!” Emile chuckled as the pure white ferret, who was probably Pearl was going crazy, while the cinnamon colored ferret, who was probably Riley, was much more calm, waiting for Emile to release them into the greater part of the house.

A moment after letting them out, Pearl was immediately clawing at and trying to climb up Emile, while Riley just simply waited at Emile’s feet. Emile chuckled, picking both of them up, having already shed his coat and outside wear. He took the two over to the couch, laying across it before letting go, Pearl immediately nipping playfully at Emile’s hand, Riley, being much more relaxed, curled up on Emile’s chest, seeming to revel in the up and down motion of Emile’s chest.

Emile flipped on the TV cycling through the channels until he found a cartoon channel, letting it drone on in the background, Emile letting his previous heaviness over take him, sinking into the couch as he drifted to sleep.

It was few hours later when Emile startled awake to his stomach growling that he realized he hadn’t had dinner. Pearl had finally tuckered herself out, leaving Riley to be the one lazily following behind as Emile went to the kitchen to prepare the meal. 

However, the moment Emile stepped into the kitchen, he felt overwhelming fear, hearing familiar sounds of pans scraping against one another. He suddenly saw a shadow over him, a mix of voices coming from in front of him, a mix of his parents voices and his patients, all their jabs at him and the things he had to hear were suddenly being thrown at him, and he felt 100x as heavy all of a sudden. He felt his breathing become labored and short and his body give up on him sliding to the floor.

Emile felt Riley poking his nose against Emile’s leg and had the awareness to pick him up and hold him to his chest, giving a bit of comfort, but Emile’s mind couldn’t stop getting those thoughts out of his head. Riley’s gentle pawing helped ground him a little, but against the onslaught of Emile’s thoughts, Emile felt helpless.

Maybe he could eat later, he just needed his thoughts to stop.

Whenever that would happen.

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