Chapter Text
That’s what friends do.
The words never seemed to leave Amity’s mind. They were a constant reminder of her greatest fear- rejection.
Luz wanted to help Amity escape that fear, but instead she only seemed to enhance it.
That’s what friends do.
Obviously the human didn’t know of Amity’s feelings, because she was too much of a coward to admit anything to her, but the subtle rejection seemed so much worse than being told flat-out that Luz didn’t reciprocate her crush.
Amity sighed, glancing out of her window, the Grom had long since passed, but her sadness still remained.
Her heart twinged at the thought of Luz not liking her back, or even being disgusted by the notion, even though she knew Luz would never be disgusted by Amity.
After all, if that were the case, why had she stuck by for so long?
She turned her head upwards to look at the stars that dotted the night sky. Slowly, she brought her hands up to her head and rested her chin on her palms, her eyes never leaving the twinkling display.
“What am I going to do,” she thought aloud.
Just then, her door opened behind her, and she whipped her head around at the noise. Standing in her doorway was her older sister, Emira.
Immediately Amity sat up straight and narrowed her eyes at her sibling. “Where’s Edric?” She asked, skipping greetings.
Emira raised an eyebrow. “He’s outside talking to that one kid, Jerbo I think was his name. But that’s not important. Something’s troubling you, Mittens.”
The shorter green-haired witch didn’t respond immediately. “N-no, nothing is troubling me. Now get out of my room.”
“Amity,” Emira sighed, “I know I haven’t always been the best sister to you. But I’m still always going to be here for you if you need to talk to me.”
Amity stared at her, her eyes still narrowed and her body still stuck in a defensive pose.
Emira stepped towards her. “And I understand, if you don’t want to talk to me. I’m still here though. So, tell me what’s going on, or tell me to go away, and I’ll accept either.”
The top student at Hexside wouldn’t crumble beneath her sister, but she felt herself crumbling anyways.
Amity began to talk. “Well, I… I have a crush on Luz. And don’t say anything- to mom, or dad, please. But I don’t think- well, I don’t know if she likes me back. And I can’t get my mind off of her. Everything and every one reminds me of her.”
Emira nodded. “I know how frustrating a crush can be. Tell me some things about her, would you?”
The younger witch’s eyes seemed to get brighter.
“She’s so determined to learn magic. When she learns a new spell she always shows it to me the next day, and it just makes me happy to see her happy. She was so brave during Grom, she offered to take my place as Grom queen just because I was scared of my own fear being outed to everyone else. She means everything to me.
“And when we were dancing she kept giving me these looks, they were so loaded, and they made me feel so special. She makes me feel like I’m everything. I love her, I know I do, and I don’t care if it’s too early to say that, I love that god damn human to the ends of the Earth!”
Amity was panting, out of breath from her long ramble to her sister, her cheeks stained with a heated blush.
Emira smiled. “Why don’t you wanna tell her how she makes you feel?”
Amity frowned. “Because— she’s Luz! The same Luz I treated so terribly, the same Luz who’s literally a ray of sunshine! Why would she ever like me? I was so cold to her!”
Her sister cocked an eyebrow mockingly. “She’s Luz, the same Luz that stumbles everytime she sees you, the same Luz that constantly wanted to impress you, and the same Luz that was willing to take your place as Grom queen just because you were afraid?
“No offense Mittens, but you are really bad at picking up signals. That girl likes you. I know she does. And besides, what’s the worst that could happen if you asked her? She’s not just gonna leave you.”
Amity collapsed onto her bed with a sigh. “But what if she does, Emira?”
The older witch chuckled. “You know she wouldn’t. Like you said, she’s Luz. She’s too kindhearted to just up and leave you.”
Scowling, Amity realized that her sister was right.
Emira turned around and began to walk back towards the door. “Glad we could have this talk, Mittens. I hope you feel better.”
Lifting her head off of her bed, Amity smiled at her sister. “Thanks, Emira.”
As the older witch walked out of the door, she called behind her, “but don’t think this means I’m gonna stop teasing you!”
Amity sat at her desk in an empty Abominations classroom, her hands clutched around her head. Her breathing was rushed and heavy, her chest seemed tight, and there were tears running down her face.
She was going to ask Luz out today. That was her plan, to ask her out and hope for the best.
She couldn’t bring herself to do it. The thought alone sent her into a downward spiral of “what if’s.”
Here she was, Amity Blight, top student at Hexside, having a panic attack over the thought of asking a girl out.
Pathetic. You’re worthless. Luz doesn’t like you back, you’re thinking wishfully. Why would she ever like a worthless dud like you? Idiot.
She let the thoughts consume her mind, completely sent out of reality.
“Amity?”
You’re so stupid to think that Luz would ever like you back. As if she would ever waste her time on someone like you.
“Amity!”
A hand on her shoulder sent her reeling back to reality. She flinched harshly away from it. “Leave me alone! Go away!” She shouted, her voice shaky and her breathing unsteady.
“Are you okay,” a calm voice asked.
Letting herself escape her thoughts for just a moment, she looked up from her desk, her eyes unfocused.
Standing before her, with a hand awkwardly reaching out in Amity’s direction, was Luz, her face stricken with worry.
“Amity,” Luz began, “are you okay? What’s wrong? I’m here for you.”
That reassurance, that sentence, so simple, just made tears fall harder down Amity’s cheeks. She lunged forward, wrapping her arms around Luz and crying into her shoulder.
Luz didn’t question it. She let her cry, and cry. She would be here when Amity was ready to talk to her.