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“Yennefer, I’m not guessing.” Tissaia sat back in the brown leather chair, in her study. She watched as Yennefer, huffed, the dark scars at the corner of her eyes reminding Tissaia of what she almost lost. Yennefer’s eyes remained closed for a moment before she opened them, the violet that had once been so striking had dimmed. An obvious sign to Tissaia that she had lost her sight.
“You’d guess if I wasn’t blind.” She folded her arms like a petulant child, pouting and looked away from the older woman as she sat on the leather chair opposite her. The fire crackling, warmth surrounding them as they spent the evening together. Yennefer lovingly annoying Tissaia until she threatened to banish her into the forest.
Both knew Tissaia would never do that.
Well, not yet anyway.
She’d found Yennefer days after Sodden, blind and wandering in the woods. She hadn’t given up hope that Yennefer was alive and she had refused to return to Aretuza no matter how much the poison Fringilla had inflicted on her, hurt.
Yennefer had almost killed herself, herself when she had found out. When she had realised Tissaia had disregarded her own condition to find Yennefer, to save her, the make sure she was alright. It was then the younger woman realised Tissaia truly cared for her.
It was then Yennefer, agreed to return to Aretuza, to get well, to stay for a while and in return Tissaia would trade in favours with higher mages that she knew, mages that didn’t take part in the chapter and they would remove her tie to Geralt.
Yennefer was free once more days after she returned to Aretuza.
Six months had passed and she was still here.
“Yennefer, you cannot keep using your blindness to try and get people to do what you want.” Tissaia rolled her eyes and the smirk on Yennefer’s face let her know that the woman had known she had, even if she couldn’t see it.
“I’m using my powers for good through, I got Triss to tell Sabrina she liked her.” Yennefer pointed out with a smug smile. “It would have taken years, if ever if I hadn’t done that.”
“No Yennefer, you didn’t get her to do that, you got her to approach Sabrina and ask her if she could, what was it?” Tissaia thought for a moment. “Ah yes, I remember now, she asked if she could burry her face in Sabrina’s breasts because there is no other place she’d rather be in that moment, she also looked like she could have been having a stroke.”
“Yes, but it was so funny and remember Sabrina’s face, scared, shocked and horny at the same time, come on, admit it, I heard you laugh!” The darker haired woman threw her hand back as she cackled. “I heard you, I know your laugh anywhere, Arch mistress De Vries.”
“How very sweet of you Yennefer, to have memorized my laugh, its almost like you do have actual feelings other than being constantly on heat.” Tissaia shot back, enjoying the surprised look on Yennefer’s face before the woman stuck her finger up at the older mage.
“I am not constantly on heat, you’re just jealous.” Yennefer stuck her tongue out.
“Of your Syphilis?” Tissaia’s grin grew. “I most certainly am not, even the most skilled of mages couldn’t remove that from you.”
“You are...” Yennefer couldn’t help but laugh at her former mentor poking fun at her. She knew she was lucky to be with the woman when she was like this. When she was so care free, when she could just be herself without the five hundred walls, she’d built up over the years in front of her. “You’re unbelievable, now you have to play the game with me now you’ve hurt my feelings.”
“Oh really?” She sighed, amused still at the woman in front of her. “Fine Yennefer, what is this game you so desperately need me to play, I will play it with you as long as we keep our clothes on and no one gets murdered or maimed, and of course no sex magik where some poor innocent towns folk are suddenly having an orgy.”
“Well, I can’t exactly watch now can I.” Yennefer remarked dryly as Tissaia chuckled. “No, this game is simple, you must simply guess what I am thinking of, you may have clues and you may not invade my mind Rectoress, I could already feel you poking around.”
“This could take forever, Yennefer.” The Rectoress immediately regretted agreeing to this game. At least watching a town have an orgy would be quick, men didn’t exactly last long. It’s quite simply why she preferred women. That and she found them superior in every way.
“Yes, well, lets start, guess!” Yennefer grinned, eyes closed again. It saddened Tissaia that the woman often kept them closed now. She knew she was insecure about them, about the scars that marred her beautiful face.
Tissaia wanted to tell her that she would always be beautiful, that she would always be the most beautiful woman in the room.
But she was a coward.
“Are you thinking about sex?” Tissaia asked bluntly, as Yennefer laughed once more. “You laugh but I expect that is what you’re thinking of half the time.”
“Jesus Tissaia, I’m not a bloody nymphomaniac.” Yennefer shook her head. “I am not thinking of sex.”
“Are you thinking of a person?” Tissaia asked, as the woman nodded happily in front of her. “It better not be that Witcher, I better not have called in my favour to get your linked removed, only for you to want to go after him anyway.”
“No, its not Geralt, Tissaia.” The unhappy expression on the younger mage’s face, made Tissaia regret her words almost immediately. She knew he was a sore spot for her. She knew Yennefer could have loved him once, if he hadn’t played with her feelings and joint their paths together without her consent.
“I..I’m sorry.” Tissaia winced at the shakiness in her own voice. “Are you thinking of Triss burying her face into Sabrina’s breasts?”
She watched as the unhappy expression was soon replaced with one of fondness. She knew Yennefer and Triss were close. She knew that they had met on their travels and had shared many adventures together. Sabrina and Yennefer were constantly like bickering sisters, always trying to one up each other but deep down, she knew they loved each other.
She had found Sabrina sat by Yennefer’s bedside, whilst she recovered, apologising for the earworm, something the woman couldn’t have prevented even if she had tried. She had seen Yennefer grasping the blonde’s hand, hear the murmurs of comfort. She had left them alone to find comfort in each other, as she had gone to check on Triss.
“I really am not thinking of that.” Yennefer said amused as she moved in the chair to lean her back against one arm and her legs over the other. “I’m thinking of someone I love, sure, but not two people I love burying their faces in each other’s breasts.”
“Someone you love.” Tissaia furrowed her eyebrows. She thought of all the people she could think of that Yennefer had come across. She hated the bard, Jaskoo, Jaspy, Jaskpur, whatever his name was, she couldn’t remember. She hated Stregobor. Wasn’t Sabrina and Triss. Istredd. It wouldn’t be.
“You’re really struggling with this aren’t you?” Yennefer’s voice was soft and filled with sadness. Tissaia was rushing through all her memories. Trying to prevent the woman for being upset further. She cursed herself. She knew this was a bad idea.
“You really can’t think of one more person, I love?” Yennefer asked as she moved again, this time moving to stand up and kneel by Tissaia’s side. “No one at all, no one at Aretuza?”
“You like the apple pie here that much, that you love the cooks?” Tissaia joked but watched as Yennefer slumped slightly. She didn’t know what else to say. Didn’t know how to make this situation better. How to bring them back to the care free banter that they had, had before.
“And I’m the blind one.” The younger woman shook her head before looking up at the Rectoress. “You, you stubborn, blind, gorgeous woman, how can someone so smart not see what is right in front of them, someone who has read me like a book for years, not be able to read the emotion in my eyes?”
Tissaia froze. She looked at Yennefer and into the woman’s violet eyes, still dim, still slightly a milky colour. She didn’t need Yennefer to have vision to see what was there. It was written all over the women’s face.
So, of course, Tissaia panicked.
She stood up from the chair, knocking Yennefer back. The younger mage landed on her back with a grunt as Tissaia stormed across the room, putting any kind of distance she can, between her and the other woman.
How could this have gone so wrong? Why couldn’t Yenneger just play a normal guessing game? She would have given anything for Yennefer’s answer to have been something childish like the dildo in her bottom draw or the cat that pissed on Stregobor’s herbs.
“Well, you’re taking this well.” Yennefer said from the floor as she struggled to get up, feeling around her with her hands, making sure she wouldn’t stand up and hit her head. That would be the last thing she would need. Knocked out on the floor of Tissaia’s chambers after confessing her love and clearly being rejected.
“You can’t.” Tissaia said as she braced herself from the bookshelf. “Yennefer, you cannot love me, I’m hundreds of years older than you, I’ve been awful to you in the past even though clearly it did you good but I don’t even have a cock and you quite like those.”
“Oh for...” Yennefer huffed loudly and impatiently, as she got up. “Where the fuck are you Tissaia, I’m fucking blind, just whistle or something and direct me if I’m going to walk into a table!”
Tissaia shut her mouth and held her breath.
“Are you kidding me, you’re really doing this?” Yennefer shook her head. “You’re acting like a child, so knock a few hundred years of your age, we’ll be closer then if that makes you feel more comfortable?”
Yennefer moved around the room, swearing whenever she bumped into an errant table or small book shelf. Eventually, she thought she could hear Tissaia’s soft breathing. She moved until she felt heat radiating from the left of her. She hoped Tissaia would tell her if she was walking towards the fire. She’d rather not be back in the infirmary, this time with burns all of her. She moved her left hand to feel out the woman.
And groped her left breast.
“Yennefer!” Tissaia practically screamed in her ear, catching Yennefer once again of course and causing her to stumble into her, soon enough both hands were groping the older woman’s breasts to keep her steady. “Yennefer, for goodness sake!”
“What do you expect me to do, you’re playing hide and go seek and I’m blind, I can’t exactly help it if you suddenly scream, I need to hold onto something!” Yennefer yelled back, frustrated and embarrassed by the situation. “I didn’t exactly go blind on purpose to just touch your tits!”
Tissaia couldn’t help it. The situation was just, like something out of a comedy novel. She began to laugh. Full on, full belly laughs as Yennefer still groped her chest. Soon she heard Yennefer join her and she removed her hand’s from Tissaia’s chest and moved them to her shoulders.
“I’m sorry Yennefer.” Tissaia moved her hands to the woman’s waist and lent her head against her chest. “I’m sorry.”
“Stop apologising and just hurry up and actually tell me to get lost, instead of just telling me I can’t.” Yennefer let herself enjoy the feeling of Tissaia against her before she no doubt rejected her. She didn’t know when she would have the chance again. She would have to leave Aretuza. Possibly the continent. Change her name. Become a fishmonger. Grow a beard.
She didn’t handle heartbreak well.
“Tell me, Yennefer.” Tissaia asked as she leant back. “Tell me, properly.”
“Tissaia.” Yennefer’s voice shook with emotion. “I love you.”
“I love you too, even if I think this is foolish, even if I think you could do a lot better, against my better judgement, I love you too.” Tissaia brushed her lips softly against Yennefer’s. “Never make me play a guessing game again.”
“I won’t, you’re bloody terrible at them.” Yennefer laughed as Tissaia poked her in the ribs.
Terrible at guessing games, but terribly good at making Yennefer laugh and even better it would turn out, at making her feel loved.