Chapter Text
"All that joy, those smiles, those laughter, those eyes full of glitter...
They seem happy.
Why doesn't it work with me?
Why do they hate me?
I only wanted to share my own vision of things.
I wanted those kids to love my performance, my world.
I wanted them to smile at me, to look at me with their big eyes full of dreams.
I wanted them to be conquered, to ask for more, always more.
But they are afraid.
They preferred someone else.
They thought I wanted to hurt them.
No...
I feel so empty,
If rejected.
It suits you, doesn't it, Balan?
It's you they prefer!
You who are loved!
You who get all the credit!
And I'm just a shadow of my former self!
Your alter-ego
I'm nothing compared to your poise
Your little shows...
They don't understand anything.
I wanted to be like you, Balan.
Loved, not feared.
I wanted to have fun,
I end up a recluse in the darkness,
To take on myself,
To remain immersed in this despair that gnaws more and more.
I don't want to be your shadow anymore,
I just want to be me,
Lance.
So you want a show?
But since you don't seem to like mine...
Well, I'll give you a reason to really hate them.
Your happiness disgusts me, so unjustly so!
Why should I be the only one to be unhappy?
Balan shares his joy with you?
Well, I will share my despair with you.
And perhaps then, I would be happy? »
He closed his eyes and stood up, determined. He had a plan. Was it revenge? Or did he want to fill the void that was weighing on him more and more?
The show must go on.