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Someday, despite all of Soundwave’s promise he’ll let him go once his Sparkling is born and weaned, freedom just tastes like an illusion. Hot Rod can only curl on himself and try not to sigh too longingly. His optics dart down toward his swollen belly, and he can’t help but wonder if his Sparkling, if Springer’s Sparkling will ever taste that freedom.
As much as he wants to believe Soundwave, he is Megatron’s TIC, he is a Decepticon. They’re not known to be very truthful. Even Thundercracker’s reassurances don’t fully ease his mind, despite the blue flier coming in daily now in order to see him, massage him and ‘getting acquainted with the Sparkling’, as he puts it.
The thought made the young Autobot chuckle mirthlessly. If he was free, he wouldn’t have to rely on a Seeker to help him along and act as a midwife for the emergence of his Sparkling. He wouldn’t have been constantly bound. He wouldn’t have had to feel two greedy little Cassettes suckling his energon out of his pouches, and he wouldn’t have felt a pump do the very same thing for Soundwave’s more animalistic partners.
He hates it. Truly. Except… it had been going on for so long now, that he can hardly imagine what it would be like if he didn’t have those constants anymore. He longs for freedom, true… but sometimes, freedom scares him as well. What would he do if he was free? Run? Hide away in his quarters? Feed Blaster’s Cassettes instead until his Sparkling has emerged? He has no idea. Here, he doesn’t have to think of anything. Not of the way Soundwave pet him or interface with him, not of what is going on beyond the walls of the Decepticon’s quarters. He just… has to be and let the solar cycles pass while waiting for the moment he’ll hold his and Springer’s Sparkling into his arms.
He glances down at himself again. His belly is so swollen it feels like it’s going to explode. He shouldn’t be here; he should be home with Springer, be it on a base on Cybertron or on Earth, in the Ark’s remains.
He should be free… but he isn’t, and he doesn’t know if he truly wants to be free anymore.