Chapter Text
Varian allowed himself a smile. The contents of a small copper pot sitting in front of him had finally begun to shimmer and shift from a murky brown to a midnight blue - he’d created something new. He’d been at this experiment for a few days straight, losing count of the hours as he deconstructed the miasma.
The vial containing a hint of colorful liquid happened to wash up at the lake’s edge during one of his scouting trips. The tiny waterfront was nearby enough to his father’s house that he could frequent its beach, hunting for oddities and ingredients necessary for his work. Normally that meant bits of sediment or rock formations that could be crushed or melted to obtain some useful metals. He never expected to come across something like this.
The purple mixture was certainly some kind of ancient alchemy, mostly likely taken from an almanac or medicinal handbook. The ingredients were relatively simple but the results… Varian shivered with excitement remembering the potent effect: The once strict grocer becoming a simpering pushover with only a few dashes in his morning coffee. Varian had been able to assemble more ingredients with essentially no resistance, enabling him to not only recreate but experiment.
The truth serum had been the first to come out of his obsessive investigation. He’d spent several days fiddling with slight variations, looking for changes of color or luminosity, indications that a different effect was being cultivated. At first when the liquid brewed green, he’d been hopeful that his changes to the formula had pushed the personality inversion even further - creating an elixir that would render the victim’s entire personality mute. That would make retrieving the last of the Sundrop flower a simple task, if it was as he hoped, buried somewhere deep in the castle’s dark, endless basement. However, after testing the green liquid - first on himself and then on some unsuspecting neighbors - the truth serum’s power was revealed.
Not bad at all, as a first step. Varian took a pipette’s worth of the dark blue liquid and squirted it into two awaiting glasses of water. But it wasn’t enough to know the Sundrop flower still sat withered and dying somewhere, even if he traveled with Rapunzel to retrieve it. He grimaced at the thought of the princess. He couldn’t let his father sit in his amber prison for one more day. He needed that flower.
And with Cassie and Eugene around, he sighed grimly, I’ll never get her alone.
Coronan guards were disposed of easily enough but he knew Rapunzel’s two constant friends were more proactive than the rest of the palace. Left alone, they’d get in the way. He mixed the blue into the clear water until the last trace of color disappeared. He swirled the cups cavalierly, contemplating his next move. He was sorry to hurt them, especially Cassandra.
Focus.
Cassie would be fine, eventually, and besides - his eyes darkened. She’d stood by, watching as he was dragged away by those palace guards. He placed the cups back on his work bench, his mind made up.
The smile crept back across his face, as he called out,
“Ruddiger! Come down here buddy,” he waved encouragingly as his small furry friend crawled gingerly towards him from across the room.
“Don’t worry,” he added, noticing the raccoon’s reluctant gait, “nothing scary this time! You won't have to do anything but wait.”
He knelt down and picked up Ruddiger, setting him on the work bench next to the glass cups. Giving them one more stir, he glanced toward the large amber structure that dominated his work room.
“I won't let you down, dad.”
-
Cassandra tore towards Rapunzel’s room. She hadn’t slept last night, marking one happy month of insomnia. Few things could worsen her mood after thirty-one sleepless nights, but given her luck... she was unsurprised when Eugene Fitzherbert rushed her by the staircase door, prattling off inane questions and sticking his nose where it didn’t belong.
“Lucky for you, it doesn’t matter what you wear tonight. Because you aren’t invited, Fitzherbert.” She said cooly, tearing her menu out of his hands. “This is a private event. Ergo, no former thieves allowed.”
“Since when am I not included in private events?” Eugene shot back, eyeing her warily. “Got up on the wrong side of the iron-maiden this morning?”
“Shove it, Eugene. I’ve got a long day.” She was already halfway down the length of the hall. Eugene sighed and ran after her, struggling to stay at pace.
“Fair, fair. But I don’t see how you’re invited and I’m not. Ladies-in-waiting outrank future kings now?”
Cass’ face folded into a withering glare.
“Ladies-in-waiting who are on duty have to be where Crowley asks us to be. And you aren't anyone's king.”
“Maybe technically…” Eugene tried to slow her down but Cass was relentless. “Look, is Freddie still mad about the incident with the Griffin? ‘Cause we both know I’m not the only one who should be taking the fall for that little-”
“Eugene,” Cass finally stopped in front of Rapunzel’s door. “Yes, these are King’s orders. I’m just carrying them out. He’s trying to cut down on liabilities, and with the delicate nature of the guests' visitation...”
“Delicate, huh…” Eugene stared her down. It was certainly possible King Frederic had shut him out. On the other hand, this wouldn’t be the first time Cass fibbed her way into getting what she wanted. “What could the Old Coronans be pissy about this time…”
“Hm, gosh, I don't know! Could it be the huge black rocks tearing up their countryside?”
Cass preferred Eugene completely in the dark if she could help it, but sometimes it was worth it to see Eugene’s eyes go wide with curiosity. Reminded him who's castle this really was.
“So, if you could please keep whatever egotistical rampage you’re on today in check? And save your date for another night.”
“E- e- egotistical?!” he sputtered, ”I’ll have you know-”
Rapunzel flung her door open, and bellowed a friendly good morning at her two companions. She wrapped her arms around Eugene, planting a kiss on his cheek. Cass quietly snuck around, grabbing a brush and Rapunzel's many hair ties.
Another day of working completely exhausted.
After a month of dealing with lack of sleep, Cassandra thought she had adjusted. But Eugene's presence during her mornings with Rapunzel made her want to collapse.
It wasn’t just that she didn’t personally care for Eugene. Yes, of course, a former thief and enemy of the kingdom lucking their way into the easy life irked her - it was antithetical to how she saw her own story unfolding: Working as hard as she possibly could here at the castle until her true destiny revealed itself. Eugene on the other hand had gone from enemy to beloved hero in one afternoon. After being forced to spend time with him, the princess’ happiness had been enough to cool her feelings from outright animosity to mild annoyance. But recently…
As she helped Rapunzel get ready, Cass’ mind flashed to the confrontation between herself and Eugene last month. It had started with her first sleepless night, when the nightmares began.
Before the princess had returned, Cass’ dreams wandered to the far away lands to which she wanted to travel, the fights she would win, and the life she was meant to live. She felt utterly detached from her grunt work around the castle, taking every opportunity to sneak off for extra training or battle formations study. These days, however, taking care of the princess seemed to be all her unconscious mind could conjure. Rapunzel flooded her dreams.
Which wasn't so bad, all things considered. Despite everything, Cass had to admit her view of the lost princess had softened over the months. She did have a horrible tendency to pry and overstep, concerning herself with the ins and outs of Cassandra’s personal life. She often ignored Cass’s sound advice, throwing herself into unnecessary danger, more often than not dragging her handmaiden along too. She was so… unlike anyone Cass had even met. And that was frustrating.
That night, Cass had been unable to rescue her from a foreign invasion. She tore through a castle in flames, screaming her name, praying she wasn’t too late. She couldn’t lose her, not like this. A faint voice called out to her-
And then she woke up, a thin layer of sweat coating her skin. Her breath was choppy and her cheeks flushed.
Get out of my head, Raps.
Royals are royals, no matter how many years they spend in a tower. Of course she was fond of the princess, but Cass was still a lady-in-waiting. A servant. She tore down to the stables, an early morning ride to the Coronan shore with Fidella calling out to her numb mind, promising distraction and a clear head by sunrise.
Except instead of a quiet, empty stable awaiting her, she’d heard a theatrical voice practicing turns of phrase in the darkness. She drew her dagger and crept towards the entrance, stealthily sneaking in to uncover… Fitzherbert. On one knee. With that damn ring again.
“Eugene…?” she sheathed her weapon as the thief spun on his heels.
“Cassandra?” he spat out, turning her elegant long a into a flat eh, a quirk he had been quick to pick up when he found out it bothered her. “What are you doing here?”
“I was planning on taking out Fidella,” she fired back, attempting to push down the knot forming in her stomach, “Not that I need to ask what you’re doing here, Mr. Prince Consort."
The former thief rolled his eyes, pocketing the ring.
“And what would you know about it, ice queen?" He said dismissively, strolling past Cassandra.
"It’s only been four months since the last one, you might wanna slow your roll. You're coming off a little desperate.” She tried to keep her banter light but the bitter edge got caught up in her throat. Eugene turned back to her, stung.
"I get it, my first proposal went... less than ideally, but the next one is gonna be a success. Rapunzel’s already basically said yes.” He smiled as the remaining color drained from Cassandra’s face.
So what if Rapunzel didn’t know about his second proposal? He knew that she knew they were meant to end up together, it was just a matter of figuring out the right moment. And despite the scowl currently occupying her face, he was confident Cass knew that too. Somewhere deep, deep down.
So why does it bother her so much?
Cass’ eyes darkened, her lack of sleep impeding her read on Eugene’s bluff. Could Rapunzel really have already said yes... ? The exhaustion and her strange dreams burned in her mind, relieving her of better judgement
“Listen Fitzherbert, you might have everyone in Corona under your spell - the king and queen seem truly convinced that all you want is Rapunzel’s happiness. But I know a bloodsucker when I see one. And I won’t allow my home to be overtaken by a con artist trying to play the most gullible girl in the kingdom.”
Cass spat her words out in a hushed whisper, looking up to see Eugene’s face contort in genuine hurt. She felt guilt wash over her, buckling her confident stance into insecurity. She reached her arm out.
“Eugene, I just-”
“Is that what you think of me?” He took a step back, “You really think this is still some ‘get rich quick’ scheme?” The thief laughed softly to himself. “And here I thought we were starting to get to know each other, Cass.”
He stole quickly towards the door, stepping into the early spring air. He shot her a glance and shrugged.
“Well, at least I know you always have Rapuznel’s best interests at heart.”
The door was empty before Cass could say another word. She cursed, sliding down into the hay and running her hands through her coarse hair.
Why did I say that?
Feeling pathetic, she took out her knife and began attacking the ground in front of her. Bad practice if she wanted to maintain the blade's durability, but at the moment it felt good to stab something.
I know that Eugene isn’t going anywhere. God, she obviously loves him.
Her mind drifted to her dreams from last night. She leaned her head to the wall and closed her eyes, letting the exhaustion overwhelm her. All she did was take care of the princess and now she couldn’t even take evenings off.
Since when do I care about Royals and who they marry? It’s her life, she can do what she wants.
Cassandra stood, and turned back towards the castle. She had to be up in an hour, another full day of work. Castle life waited for nobody, least of all a handmaiden.
-
“Eugene isn’t invited?!” Rapunzel’s blonde hair whipped around. She looked pointedly at Cassandra, mouth open in disbelief. Cass rolled her eyes.
“It’s on your father’s orders. I’m sorry Raps, but they’re trying to avoid any further mishaps,” she futzed around Rapunzel’s room, finalizing their preparation for the day. Eugene looked on from the door frame, smiling as his girlfriend fought for his place.
Cass wanted to smack that smirk right off his face. In the month since they'd fought at the stables, they hadn’t said another word about it. Or told Rapunzel.
“But that wasn’t his fault!” The princess squared herself in front of Cassandra, hands on her hips. “Besides, both the Griffin and my father left happy, so maybe we should provide a little personality reversal.”
“Look, Rapunzel, the whole situation seems a little fraught to me,” she said dismissively, going around the princess and pulling out her only remaining clean dress. The other outfits had been rendered unwearable by yesterday’s painting activity.
“If you want to take it up with your father: be my guest. But maybe Fitzherbert can sit this one out without making a huge stink about it.”
She caught his eye from across the room. Checking to make sure Rapuznel wasn’t looking, she stuck out her tongue. The princess sighed and stepped behind her folding screen and into the dress Cassandra had waiting.
“Well... maybe you’re right. One dinner isn't such a big deal.” As Eugene began to sputter his disapproval, she rolled her eyes and shouted, “Besides, I’m sure it won’t take too long and we can still make it a late evening date instead!” The blonde hair popped up from behind the thin veneer.
“Wouldn’t that be more romantic anyway?” She batted her heart eyes at the rogue, who couldn’t help but let the frown melt off of his face.
“Well, it would definitely shake up my big plans for tonight but... I guess you’re right. It’ll probably be a snooze-fest anyway!” He smiled wide as Rapunzel re-entered the room. It quickly dissipated as Cassandra followed close behind, satisfied at his retreat. His eyes narrowed, and unable to resist the barb, shot back,
“I suppose your lady-in-waiting will still be present tonight? Despite her involvement with the Griffin incident?” Cass frowned.
“Well, she is officially on duty,” Rapunzel smiled up at him, “but Eugene, if it means so much to you, I’ll ask my father again if you can join us. I’m having lunch with him today.”
The princess gave him a quick peck on the lips before starting out of the room, Cassandra’s blue dress following close behind. As they cleared the door, Cass' head whipped around and gave him one last withering gaze before turning the corner. He listened as Cass began a monotone delivery of what sounded like a packed schedule, her voice fading as they sped towards their first engagement.
Eugene sighed, running his hands through his hair. He understood he couldn’t be at every royal event, and the King and Queen still had some reason to be distrustful of him. Trouble seemed to follow the trio everywhere, not that it was ever entirely his fault! He knew they were probably just being cautious and Cass’ behavior was only out of love for Rapunzel.
But it was true that if things went according to his and Rapunzel’s plan, he would be prince consort one day. Why would his future queen want to be best friends with someone who had it out for him?
-
“Are you feeling okay?” Rapunzel cut Cassandra off at the end of her prep for the breakfast they were attending.
Nobles from the Hoskins' House, blah, blah, Old Corona, something, something, crop failures.
The young princess was more curious about her best friend. She could always tell when something was bothering her, even when Cassandra didn’t want her to ask.
“What do you mean?” Cass kept her eyes forward, unyielding. Rapunzel sighed and tugged at her arm.
“I know my father doesn’t want too many people at this dinner but you were being more snippy than usual with Eugene this morning.” Cass remained aloof, “What is up with you two recently? You know I hate it when my two favorite people refuse to get along.”
“It’s nothing Raps, really, I just haven’t been sleeping lately and your boyfriend tends to step on my every nerve.”
Cassandra tried to resume at pace, but Rapunzel was already in front of her. Cass sighed and looked away, not allowing Rapunzel’s curiosity to get the better of her. Caught up in the monotony of shepherding her around Corona, she could ignore the painful feelings brought on by the strange dreams. But when the princess poked her nose into it...
“Are you sure, Cass? You look a little... red,” she said cautiously, “Did… I do something to make you mad?”
She took Cassandra’s roughened hands in her own. The handmaiden felt her cheeks flush.
“I’m fine, I promise,” Cass pulled her hands away and turned Rapunzel around, “Come on, we’ll be late to meet with the Hoskins if we don’t keep walking.”
Rapunzel quieted to Cass’ relief, although she continued to cast worried glances towards her friend every few seconds. Cass kept her eyes on their destination.
The dreams had only intensified in the month since. Cass hardly even tried to sleep anymore. Some nights, she woke up in that cold sweat, terrified Rapunzel had been stolen away. Other nights, she woke to a red face, thoughts of the two of them smiling and laughing in her bedroom still fresh in her mind. Cass had begun to prefer the nightmares. At least those were less confusing.
Cass always thought caring too much for other people was - at best - an unnecessary distraction. Something for people who had nothing else to fill up their empty lives. At worst, it was a liability. She focused on other, more practical things, like her training - fighting, protecting, and persevering in a dangerous world.
She cared for her father, of course, but that was out of respect for the man who’d adopted her, saved her from a life on the Coronan streets. After she turned sixteen, he'd started floating the idea of marriage, bringing young tradesmen home for dinner every few weeks. Cass chuckled, remembering the long, awkward silences.
But after a year or so - and a few major fights - the proposals stopped. Now at twenty-two, Cass was thankfully pretty much certain her father had given up. Growing up in the castle, she saw young women being used like bargaining chips, gifts to and from powerful families. 'True love' could be afforded to long lost princesses, and no one else.
Just another reason not to think about it. Getting out of marriage had been easy as an orphan with nothing to offer, made even easier by her not wanting anyone. Her eyes flashed sideways.
During her recent off-duty alone time with Rapunzel - swimming in their lagoon or sneaking around just the two of them - a question had wormed its way into her head. She dismissed it as ridiculous - she simply cared deeply about the princess. Given that she wasn't used to feeling that way about anyone, the feelings had intensified and confused her.
And yet.
They arrived at the local eatery without any more conversation. Rapunzel spotted the local lord and sat him down near the window, beginning their breakfast with gusto. Cass looked on, proud of how her diplomacy skills had grown in the months since she arrived. She was something to watch in action now, all smiles and boundless energy.
Suddenly embarrassed, Cass quietly joined Rapunzel at the table. She couldn’t get so lost in her thoughts. Someone could notice her staring aimlessly at her friend.
Her future queen, she reminded herself.
-
Varian crept along the underside of the Coronan Bridge, the impressive structure connecting the island capital to the mainland. Normally, agility was not the young alchemist’s strong suit but currently… Varian gripped his small black paws, or would they be hands, into the brick as he slowly made his way towards the palace. Making a mental note to learn more about the basic physiology of raccoons, he gripped the vial containing a dark blue mixture, assuring himself that he had not dropped it. While there were other animals who could’ve made the journey to Corona less conspicuous, it was the opposable thumbs of his constant companion that would make his mission a success.
Getting to the palace should be simple now. His real body sat at the edge of the bridge, hopefully pacified by the food and drink he’d left himself with.
Please let no one find him before I get back.
Varian picked up the pace towards the castle, taking care to avoid dogs and the occasional animal catcher stalking the backstreets of Corona. The last thing he needed was to get caught.
He hadn’t been so stupid as to not have a back up plan. He'd had taken some precaution in case of capture, a failsafe. After twenty-four hours, he should find himself back in his regular body. Perhaps with a raccoon to rescue from a cage, but at least, human. A full day of confusion between the princess’ entourage should give him enough time to carry out his underground mission.
Granted, that’s the one thing I never tested. Time was of the essence if he wanted his father to have a chance at surviving the amber. And the twenty-four failsafe worked with the truth serum. There was no reason to think it wouldn't have the same effect now.
The boy within the raccoon swallowed hard as the enormous palace gates appeared in his low down line of vision. He was sure the failsafe would prove superfluous. All he needed now was to make his way to the kitchen. Hopefully the staff kept Cass and Eugene’s food clearly labeled...
-
“And on this special occasion, we celebrate our friends: the House of Hoskins, from Old Corona. Their significant support of our new security measures, both in men and gold, has guaranteed the Princess will be kept safe from any potential threats-”
The King is really hammering this one home.
Cassandra’s eyes drooped to the floor. She shuffled in her heels, begging for relief from her handmaiden uniform. Last week, she had been guarding this room for the Griffin, protecting her royal family and her kingdom. Now?
Now, she sat in a blue dress with white trim, poking at poultry with the wrong fork. She’d barely touched her food, unable to push down the sick feeling that stuck in her stomach all day. Raps’ line of questioning had been dangerous, especially given her naivety. If she ever got an inkling of Cass' dreams or these unusual recent thought patterns, Eugene would know within an hour. Her father by the end of the day. Then it would be a convent for sure.
“...And, without their hard work in the Coronan countryside, how could we have survived the sudden winter storm…”
She stole a look back at the guards behind her, crisp uniforms, lances in hand. She stewed in her exhaustion and anger. How could her father justify trusting her one week and throwing her back in a dress the next? It was all so unbelievably unfair, like everything she was dealing with. Another problem that would be solved if she hadn’t been an orphan girl, hadn’t been forced into being a handmaiden, good for nothing more than doing laundry and standing around.
Her eyes scanned the room, narrowing on Eugene. The pretty boy sat next to Rapunzel, fiddling with his also-untouched food. Of course he’d made it in, Rapunzel’s doing. No one could resist her requests, least of all me. Cass sank further into her chair. He leaned over and whispered something, probably obscene, but it got the princess giggling and blushing. Cass’ grip tightened around her silverware.
Could this night get any longer?
At that moment, the King concluded his speech with a request for dessert, and the kitchen staff began moving again. Cassandra watched them bring out trays of fruitcake paired with almond wine, alcohol so sweet she could barely keep it down. The plate was set in front of her, and she went to push it away before catching Rapunzel’s eyes. Her face strewn with worry, she subtly raised a glass to her lady-in-waiting, mouthing one word:
Cheers?
Cass smiled despite herself, following Rapunzel’s lead. A peace offering. Despite her confusion, she couldn’t keep taking it out on the two of them. Acting miserable would only make the feelings more powerful. Eugene raised his glass as well, offering a sincere smile. The three friends drank, momentarily forgetting the awkwardness of the day.
The drink hit her like a sack of bricks. She pulled away from the glass, almost spitting it up. What the hell was in this stuff? Cass wasn’t exactly known as a light weight, and besides, this was dessert wine.
She turned from side to side, gauging her fellow guests’ response to the toxin. No one at her table seemed to have noticed her reaction or have gotten hit with the same putrid taste. Turning back, her eyes lagged behind the movement of her head, her hands beginning to tingle.
Cassandra’s mind raced. Unfortunately in this kingdom, there were too many possibilities.
Poison? Opiate? Some kind of alchemic elixir?
She attempted to steel herself against the mixture but was already underwater. She grabbed the table in front of her, causing the guests seated around to jump. Looking up, she locked eyes with Rapunzel, who rose to her feet calling her name. Her vision slipped sideways to Eugene, who's eyes looked... slightly unfocused. Tipping out of her chair, Cassandra fell to the ground and everything went dark.
-
Through a small crack high up in the walls of the banquet hall, a small furry form smiled before stealing back into the Coronan night. Chaos ensues, he giggled to himself, imagining the rest of their evening. Now all he had to do was get safely back to his body to begin the second part of his plan. Varian sped off through the ceiling, back towards his own body.
-
The pounding in her head pushed her towards consciousness.
...if you can’t get a hold of the doctor, then…
...have you any idea what could have happened to Lord…
...Eugene!
Her eyelids cracked open. Rapunzel’s terrified face was inches from her own. If it weren’t for the nausea and complete exhaustion overwhelming her, she’d have jumped a foot in the air.
“Eugene!”
The princess dove into a hug, which Cass protested with a loud groan. The sudden affection ignited her head and sent a painful shiver down her spine.
Eugene?
“I’m okay Raps, just go easy on the hugging…” Cassandra wheezed. She couldn’t bring herself to sit up, and focused on breathing instead. Worst hangover of her life.
“Oops!” Rapunzel reversed course, easing her back down to the ground, “I’m so glad you’re awake, you had me terrified.” She turned around to what Cass assumed was a room still filled with guests,
“He’s awake everyone! But still in a lot of pain,” she heard sighs of relief amidst continued murmuring, “How is she?”
Did Rapunzel just call me ‘he’?
“I’ll be right back, my love,” the blonde was looking into her eyes with an… unusual amount of devotion, “I just need to check on Cassandra. Whoever did this… they were trying to hurt both of you.”
Did my drink fry her brain too?
And then Rapunzel bent down and kissed Cassandra on the lips.
Immediately Cass was at full alert, her cheeks bright red.
“I love you,” the princess squeezed her hand.
“Raps…?” she croaked out, but the princess was already off to the other corner of the room and out of sight.
Rapunzel… just… kissed me? Her mind spinning, she felt unconsciousness coming back for round two. With one last burst of energy, she lifted up her head and took in her surroundings, noticing she was on the other side of the banquet hall from where she had been seated.
Rapunzel kissed… me?
Scanning for where she’d gone, she located the blonde kneeling next to someone else unconscious on the floor, wearing a light blue dress. A small crowd surrounded this person and Rapunzel was speaking to them, obviously agitated. She caught one word: Cassandra.
That’s… me.
The thought entered her mind before her logical side could stop it. That couldn’t be her. She was here. She was her. There was no other person she could be. They... must simply have a similar dress.
The princess… called me Eugene.
Gripped with dawning horror, Cassandra looked down. The handmaiden screamed.
Swaths of blue leather wrapped unfamiliar skin and hair, encasing a foreign body both taller and wider than it should be. Mouth wide open, she moved her hands across her too hairy arms and chest, examining the olive complexion and well moisturized hands. She scrambled for explanations, her brain struggling to make sense of such intense incongruity. She found herself standing, the headache and nausea gone. Her hands jumped to her chin.
That… stupid… little… goatee.
Grabbing a glass off the table, she gazed into her reflection. Begging the universe for a swift end to this hallucination.
And Eugene Fitzeherbert stared back at her. His plucked eyebrows, well trimmed hair, and perfect nose glinting in the shining crystal. Even the look of shock resting on his face she recognized from her many adventures with the former thief.
On… my face . The thought slipped out. Cassandra felt ill.
Setting the glass down, she looked back down at her… well, at Eugene’s body. It was undeniable. The outfit, the shape, even her smell was now Eugene’s, his fancy cologne wafting up to her nostrils, instead of her usual mix of sweat and soap. If there was ever a time she wanted to see her blue dress…
My dress, she thought, and whipped her head back across the room. She saw the person in her handmaid's outfit slowly rising, rubbing her head.
“Gosh, blondie, if you didn’t want to have me at the dinner, you shoulda just said so!” Cassandra heard her voice ring out.
Eugene.
That was her pale face, framed by the stupid blue veil Crowley forced her to wear. She watched in horrible fascination as it scrunched up in embarrassment.
“Wow, what was in that stuff? My voice sounds two octaves higher.”
The two mixed up bodies found each other’s eyes. Eugene’s jaw dropped, and Cass was already crossing the room and grabbing his hand.
“Outside. Now!” she hissed, her panicked command fizzling out in Eugene’s baritone.
She pulled at her own arm, noting with what would normally be pleasure at how easily Eugene stopped her from within her body. He continued to stare at his own face, mouth open.
“You’re… you’re… me?”
Rapunzel turned Eugene around, worry growing on the princess’ face.
“Cassandra, are you feeling alright? Whatever was in that drink must’ve really affected you, you just called me blondie!”
“Cassandra?” Eugene whimpered. The real Cass groaned. She watched her own body glance between the two of them before the thief finally cast his gaze down towards the body he currently inhabited.
Now this, she thought grimly, was gonna be bad. She grabbed her own hand and was already pulling Eugene out of the room as the screaming began.
-
This time, her real body was so in shock that it took almost nothing to drag Eugene away from the banquet hall into a secluded room. Checking to make sure it was clear, Cass turned back to face… herself. Her normally strong features contorted up in a mess of whimpering, Cass sighed. He looked like a little girl separated from their mother.
“Are you… Zhan Tiri?”
That stopped her short.
“ What?” Cass spat out, exasperated, “No, Eugene, it’s me. It’s Cassandra.”
Observant as ever, Fitzherbert .
“Cass!” The thief’s voice breaking as he unsuccessfully attempted to lower his pitch, “You did this to us?! I should’ve known your moodiness was jealousy all along! You better switch us back right-”
“Eugene!” Cass grabbed her body’s shoulders, “I didn’t do this! What are you, crazy? I’m as confused as you are!” She relinquished her grip and watched her own face contort even further into panic.
“No, no, no, no!” he whined, “you need to know what’s going on! If you don’t know how we got like this, then how are we ever gonna swap back?”
“I don’t know yet, but you need to calm down!”
“Of course, you’re calm,” turning away, he began to pace the length of the small room, attempting to straighten his dress as if it were his button down, “who wouldn’t be with those cheekbones…”
“Eugene,” Cassandra groaned, “believe it or not, I’m also not thrilled about looking at my own face right now. But unless you wanna alert the whole castle to our situation, shut your mouth!”
That finally got him quiet, leading to a thick silence falling over the room. Cass couldn’t resist smirking as Eugene stared at his shoes, continually pulling and prodding at the uncomfortable wiring and fabrics that made up her uniform.
At least I’m not the only one who hates that dress.
“Okay, so obviously someone spiked our drinks with something,” Cass offered, “and whatever it was caused… this.” She gestured down, wincing.
And if we don’t get the antidote, I’ll be looking at this body everyday for the rest of my life.
The thought made her want to throw up.
“Who do we know who has that kind of magic?”
Eugene-inside-Cassandra’s eyes widened.
“You don’t think - Xavier again?!” he groaned, “I mean, there’s teaching a lesson and then there’s serious physical harm!”
“Being me is not serious physical harm!”
“Might as well be...” he scowled, “God, my voice has never sounded more annoying. Couldn’t you at least try to capture my intricate phrasing?”
“Your voice? You make me sound like a whiny little girl!” she shot back.
“It’s hard not to, the whine is so natural to the form!”
“Eugene!” she barked before taking a deep breath, “Look, we have to figure this out together, so let’s cool it with the insults?”
Eugene slumped back into silence, Cass’ mind turned back towards their next move.
Xavier. Of course, he must be involved. The old blacksmith had scuttled their personalities just last Monday.
Why does the mystical crap always happen to me ?
“Xavier is a good place to start. I’m sure he’ll have an idea of what caused this. Come on, if we hurry, we’ll be back before anyone knows we’re-”
The door slammed open and revealed a frenzied Rapunzel.
“There you two are!”
Her hair unbraided and wild, the princess pulled Cassandra into another bone-crushing hug.
“What is going on?” Rapunzel asked as she relinquished her victim, “You two both pass out at the same time, start talking crazy, and then rush out of the room?”
The two body-swapped frienemies exchanged quick glances, trying to develop an unspoken repartee where none had existed before. Cass pleaded for silence.
Eugene, for once, shut your mouth. If you tell her everyone in the castle will know.
This was far and away worse than the personality swap. If prancing around like a happy-go-lucky idiot hadn’t been humiliating enough, now everyone in the castle would find out she was currently inhabiting Fitzherbert’s body. The thought of anyone knowing, especially Rapunzel, made her want to change her name and run far away.
Unable to gage his response, she turned back to Rapunzel.
“Well… blondie,” Cassandra offered, trying her hand at imitating Eugene’s rogue-ish cadence, “Cass and I here were just… getting some air?”
Rapunzel raised an eyebrow. Cass tried again, gesticulating broadly.
“You know, after that fall… I wasn’t myself for a second. And, I figured Cassandra here felt the same.”
She smiled slightly, proud of herself for catching Eugene’s infuriating pronunciation of her name. She looked back at herself, gesturing slightly. He rolled his eyes.
“Uh… yeah, Raps,” he mumbled after a moment of silence, “I felt pretty rough there for a minute but I’m doing much… better now. Fitzherbert and I just need some rest.”
“Yes!” Cass said, more confidently now, walking towards Rapunzel with what she hoped was a Eugene-like-swagger, “We’ll be fine after a good night’s sleep. So! We’ll see you in the morning and-”
“Woah, you guys are gonna go to bed?” Rapunzel said, confused, “Someone tried to poison you both, and you’re just going to sleep?”
“Ehrm… well…” Cass’ head spun in place, “You know I need my beauty rest?”
“Yeah!” Eugene piped up, a little frantic, “And I have to go… polish my weapons! It calms me.”
Rapunzel looked a little lost but nodded slowly.
“Well, of course, whatever you two need.” She grabbed Cass-inside-Eugene’s hands and pulled her close. Cass flushed at being two inches from Rapunzel. Eugene’s mouth opened slightly.
“Eugene,” she started sweetly, “I know it’s been a long night, but we can still make room for our late-evening date! I know how much you wanted it to happen.”
“Oh! Yes! Well, no! We don’t have to worry about-” Cass tried to inch herself away.
“Here, let’s at least go back to my room for some nighttime cookies!” Rapunzel smiled, “That always makes you feel better before bed!”
Cass’ mind began to race. How was she going to ditch Rapunzel? Whatever had happened to herself and Eugene, she needed to stick with her body until she was inside it again.
“Right… but-”
“Cassandra!”
Cass watched in dismay as her father tore into the room towards Eugene, who eyed the Captain of the Guard warrily.
“Thank god, are you alright?”
Eugene’s eyes flashed back to Cassandra, begging for any kind of help. Cass just shrugged her shoulders.
“Uhm, yeah Dad, I’m fine,” he said after a short pause.
Rapunzel turned towards the Captain.
“They’re both exhausted, would you mind getting Cass to bed?” Lowering her voice, she added, “I think they’re still a little loopy from whatever was in those glasses.”
He nodded and turned towards his daughter’s body, placing a strong arm around her. Eugene squirmed within his grip.
“We should have the palace doctor check them out before they go to sleep.”
Rapunzel turned towards Eugene, unaware that her boyfriend looked at her from within her best friend’s body. Smiling, she squeezed his hands.
“Let’s make sure you're okay and put to bed. First thing tomorrow, I'll come check on you and we’ll start tracking down whoever did this. No one messes with Cassandra and gets away with it.”
Eugene cleared his throat as if to speak, but nothing came out. The Captain slowly led him out of the room as Cassandra watched her own head whip back and forth panicked. His eyes called out for Cass to interrupt, to keep him from alone time with her father, but Cass couldn’t think of any reason Eugene would need to talk to her alone, especially when she looked so… frail. She had never seen herself so unsteady.
No wonder Raps is trying to send me to bed.
Her father and her body turned the corner towards her bedroom and she began adjusting their already flimsy plan.
Okay, so I’ll have to rescue Eugene from my room and break us out. No problem. I just have to get away from Rapunzel and-
“Why don’t we go back to your room, Eugene?” The princess’ eyes were back on her, with plenty of sweet concern, “That way, the medic can see you and we can have you in bed as soon as possible. I’ll stay with you the whole night if you need me!”
No, no, no!
“Look Raps, I’m fine, I just really need some sleep and I’m sure you need to decompress after all of that-”
“You called me Raps again!” Cass flinched, caught. Rapunzel frowned and moved in close, “You only call me that when you’re upset. What’s going on, really?”
Cass sighed. If she was going to get the princess to leave her alone, she had to play the part more convincingly. If she kept acting like Cassandra, Rapunzel wouldn’t believe her boyfriend was okay enough to be by himself.
Another thought quietly crept into her mind.
Besides, when will you ever get another chance to have a date with Rapunzel?
That was all the motivation she needed. Forcing a smile, she turned back to Rapunzel and re-entered her Eugene impression.
“Nothing’s wrong! And some cookies sound great!”
That couldn’t possibly take too long, right?
“Are you sure?” Rapunzel didn’t look convinced. Cass smiled nervously.
“Of course, blondie, I’m never too tired for some time with my… girlfriend.”
“Aw, Eugene!” The princess opened into a wide smile, “I was so worried about you… and Cass. I thought I had lost the two most important people in the world to me on the same day.”
Looking up, she gave Cass another kiss, getting up on her tiptoes and leaning in. Cass involuntarily pulled away at the affection, startled. Rapunzel also took a step back.
“Is that not okay right now?” she asked, a little hurt.
“No, no! Of course it is!” Cass realized her mistake and came closer in towards Rapunzel. Steeling herself, she took her head in her hands and kissed her.
Oh.
As soon as it began, Cass was lost within the kiss. A few seconds too many clicked by as the two gently locked lips. Finally, Rapunzel pulled away.
“Oh, Eugene…” she said, seeming just as undone, “I love you.”
“I… I love you too, Raps.” Rapunzel didn’t seem to notice the incorrect nickname. She pulled Cassandra wordlessly through the door.
“Uhm, my room, you said?”
-
Eugene sat in Cassandra’s room, silently cursing Xavier while waiting for the doctor to arrive. The Captain stared at him.
Worst. Day. Ever.
He went to shove his hands in his pockets and was met with smooth satin. His eyes filled with rage.
Are you kidding me?! Pockets! Where are you when I need you?