Chapter Text
Unnamed chat group
Partyhoe has added Grandking, Organic Farmer and +2
Best ace: What the fuck is this
Organic Farmer: This is a chat room Best ace
Grandking: OH MY GOD THE FUCKING FARMER IS HERE WHAT THE FUCK
Organic Farmer: Hello to you to Oikawa
Grandking: I did not say hello to you compost peice of shit
Partyhoe: Yo bros, chill, were meant to be friends
Best ace: I did not sign up for this
Partyhoe: You didn't have to boo
Organic Farmer: You can however sign up for my fathers special limited edition fresh produce in a few weeks
Court King: Who is everyone?
Grandking: Lowkey forgot tobio doesn't have any friends
Partyhoe: INTRODUCTIONS BEST FRIENDS
Best ace has left the chat
Partyhoe has added Best ace into ' unnamed chat group'
Best ace: Why must I live only to suffer?
Grandking: Cuz ur a pussy "BEST ACE"
Best ace: Says 'Grand King'
Partyhoe: INTRODUCTIONS BEST FRIENDS
Best ace has left the chat
Partyhoe has added Best ace into ' unnamed chat group'
Grandking: What is this Dejavu?
Court King has changed their name to 'Kageyama'
Kageyama: Hello everybody I am Kageyama Tobio from Karasuno, I like Milk and volleyball
Dickfossil: Is u that till scurry gay hoo give M8 spanking
Partyhoe: Dude no lie your spilling is giving me a seizure
Grandking: Spelling*
Kageyama: Spelling*
Organic Farmer: Spelling*
Dick fossil: Spelling*
Best ace: Spelling*
Partyhoe: I commented on a life threatening text and you all attacked me like this
Dick fossil: To be fair you were being a hypocrite Party hoe
Best ace: I still dont know anyone yet so I'll go ahead and
Best ace has changed their name to 'Sakusa'
Sakusa: Second year ace of Itachiyama academy in Tokyo
Partyhoe: You have embraced your inner hoe, I'm shedding tears of joy may Japanese Jesus bless me an orgasm for I am faint of heart (((φ(◎ロ◎;)φ)))
Grandking: I cannot with you hoes but guess I gotta join the fun ヽ(✿ﾟ▽ﾟ)ノ
Grandking has changed their name to ' Oikawa '
Oikawa: captain of aoba johsai Oikawa Tooru ⁓
Organic Farmer: I know Oikawa
Oikawa: Oh my fucking god stfu
Dick fossil: Mm sexual tension
Organic Farmer: I have no desire to have sexual intercourse with someone who isnt in Shirotorizawa
Best ace: School patriot on another level
Organic Farmer: Oikawa you should've joined Shirotorizawa
Oikawa has left the chat
Party hoe has added Oikawa to 'unnamed group chat'
Oikawa: I'm going to jump off a eight story building while cursing Shirotorizawas name if you so help me
Dick fossil: Does that mean your a virgini
Sakusa has changed ' Oikawa' to 'Virgini'
Party hoe: I'm w h e e z i n g
Dick fossil: Lol everytime I see Oikawa in a match I see him flirting left and right with anyone (He flirted with aone once)
Kageyama: I thought Oikawa was not a virgin (wow he did?)
Organic Farmer: I thought so too monster setter, but I guess he was never dick downed (Kind of surprised)
Partyhoe: OIKAWA IS A BOTTOM (I wanted to flirt with aone too)
Virgini: Never have I ever been disrespected like this
Organic Farmer: You have
Virgini: I am this close to SHANKING you lowly peasant farmer
Organic Farmer: A farmer denotes a man who works on agricultural land and also owns the farm. He may also keep livestock on farm. A peasant is a person who is like an agricultural labour and occupies a lower social rank. Though the difference between the two don't matter because they both are crucial to the social hierarchy. Without them the big shots world wide would be nothing but dust so people should humble down and realize that their cockiness and arrogance are baseless.Furthermore I am by no means lenient on those who degrade others using petty insults, you have been warned Oikawa
Sakusa: I'm actually kind of impressed so I'll help you out Organic Farmer
Sakusa has changed 'Organic Farmer' to 'Ushijima'
Sakusa: Ushijima captain of Shirotorizawa third year and third best ace of the country
Ushijima: Thank you Sakusa
Partyhoe: SO Yall actually do know some of these hoes you lying hag
Kageyama: Who is Dick Fossil
Dick fossil: Thats for me to know and for you to find out
Party hoe has changed 'Dick fossil' to ' Futakuchi'
Kageyama: @Futakuchi I found out, your the captain of Datek, we had a practice match last week remember me?
Virgini: Kageyama low key trying his best to make friends is kinda funny
Sakusa: I will literally murder you if you hurt my son cherry boi
Ushijima: When was this development?
Sakusa: When I realized how pure Kageyama is,
Kageyama: Thank you Sakusa
Kageyama: ヾ(≧▽≦*)o
Party hoe: Thats so fucking cute I-
Virgini: I will shank all of you
Futakuchi: Your threats are laughable Virgini
Ushijima: Party hoe to continue on, who are you
Party hoe: YALL SAVED THE BEST FOR LAST
Party hoe has changed their name ' Terushima'
Terushima: CAPTAIN OF JOHZENJI
Kageyama: Oh your the one who flirted with Kiyoko right?
Terushima: yah my bad I didn't know she was into someone already could you tell her I'm sorry Kageyama
Kageyama: Ok
Futakuchi: Teru Teru really be out here flirting with anyone
Ushijima: Terushima...the blonde undercut teen?
Virgini: OH YOUR THAT REALLY HOT GUT WITH THE PIERCINGS
Terushima: THATS ME BAD BOY SUPREME
Sakusa: Piercings?
Kageyama: Sakusa I thought you didn't like piercings
Sakusa: I may be a germaphobe but that doesn't mean I can't like piercings... even tho its a bit gross
Terushima: I'm tottally down to help you get some if your game
Sakusa: really...oh wait your all the way in Miyagi
Virgini: Itachiyama is like in Tokyo right?
Virgini: WAIT SAKUSA YOUR THE ACE OF ITACHIYAMA HOLY SHIT THAT MEANS ON THE RANKINGS UR HIGHER THAN USHIJIMA
Kageyama: He said it in his introductions but you can go off with your bite size brain i guess
Terushima: I- Kageyama our boi
Sakusa: I'm so proud of my son
Ushijima: You've grown from our first meeting Kageyama
Futakuchi: I'm happy for you Kageyama
Kageyama: (*/ω＼*)
Virgini: I hate it here, why did you even make this gc Teru Teru
Terushima: Well to be honest everyone see's me as a person whos always like I dunno a crackhead.
Terushima: They think I act rashly all the time and think I'm pretty unreliable. I'm not all about having fun, I could be serious too but everyone around me doesn't like seem to believe me.Now I' lost my funk.
Terushima: Its just frustrating that the friends I made for three years don't understand me at all. I thought it would be nice to make friends with a few people who don't think I'm a two timing fuck boy.
Virgini: Oh
Sakusa: Ugh I know how it feels, I'm always classified as an antisocial rude bitch. My OCD doesn't help either
Kageyama: Well I guess a lot of people only see me as a dumb volleyball boy who wants to pick a fight all the time.
Ushijima: I'm not all that intimidating...
Futakuchi: HECK YEAH I'M TIRED OF BEING THE ASSHOLE I WANNA BE SOFT HERE
Virgini: Well this got a lot more serious but I guess I can relate, sometimes I get tired of my 'go lucky' facade
Terushima: Yall hoes warm me up
Kageyama: Does this mean were friends?
Virgini: Dumb first year read the room
Ushijima: Ignore Virgin boy Kageyama he is just bratty
Futakuchi: MM I can feel the love but for real homos we gotta hit the hay
Ushijima:???
Terushima: Framer rich boi no comprehend our language
Sakusa: He wants us to sleep Ushijima
Ushijima: That is very much advisable, tomorrow is a school day
Virgini: Futakuchi is actually a mom not a dick who makes fun of you.....
Futakuchi: says the captain who has to rely on his manly spiker to handle the team.
Futakuchi: I wonder how you even became captain actually? Were you just good at setting? Nothing else?
Virgini: That was a compliment you bitch smol dick
Futakuchi: HO HO bland insults don't work on me
Kageyama: Do you always become flustered when someone gives you a compliment Futakuchi kun
Terushima: EXPOSED
Virgini: UR JUST A SHY BOI
Futakuchi: LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE
Sakusa: Why don't you all act this way irl
Ushijima: We have images to uphold, now can everyone hit the hay
Futakuchi: Oh you used it right
Ushijima: I am also surprised on how fast I picked that up
Virgini: Slow snail
Sakusa: Slug
Virgini: Le Gasp
Futakuchi: Whatever I'm gonna go to bed now its like 2 am
Sakusa: Wait how did Terushima even get our numbers in the first place
Virgini: You introduced yourself anyway , you fear no stranger danger
Sakusa: I know two people in this chat
Virgini: You defending yourself is pathetic
Virgini: Did everyone go to bed
Virgini: ?
Virgini: HELOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Virgini: IM ALL ALONEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Virgini: IM IN THE UNKNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWN
Futakuchi: GO THE FCK TO BED AND STFU