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Really, Benrey had meant it as a joke.
"I dunno, man, sometimes I just wonder what kissing is like. Why everyone makes it sound so important."
"you can kiss me and find out lmao"
He didn't expect Gordon to actually take him up on that offer. He didn't know that it was an offer to begin with.
It's not like Benrey wasn't curious. There was something so weird about the Human Affection Ritual Of Mushing Your Mouths Together that sort of fascinated and mildly disgusted him at the same time. What was so nice about pressing your face-holes against one another? He saw lots of kisses in movies, and they were always such a big deal. They were slow, dramatic, with dynamic camera angles and swelling music. It kind of got annoying after a while.
They were also always between a man and a woman. There were never two boys kissing.
Benrey swallows back some Sweet Voice--
red to brass means I feel embarrassed
--and laughs. But the laughter dies out when he sees how badly Gordon is blushing
not that Benrey's any better
, how Gordon isn't smiling with amusement or teasing.
"... wait uh. you're serious?"
"I-I mean…" Gordon can't continue, but he nods. "... We agree that we're never speaking of this again though, right?"
"no idea what you're talking about, bro. what kiss. never heard of him."
Gordon's lips quirk, and he covers his mouth to stifle his snickers. "C--C'mon, dude, this is serious. I-if you want to… y'know, find out, then… w-we could…?"
"i mean we're both wearing socks, bro."
Blink. "What the fuck does that have anything to do with this."
"gamer code. it's not gay if you have socks on. you are wearing socks, right?"
"Yeah???"
"then it's not gay."
"What the fuck--!" Gordon dissolves into laughter, and Benrey smiles softly. There's that laugh. Of course Benrey knows how serious this is; but if he can relieve Gordon of just a bit of that anxiety, he would.
Gordon takes a deep breath, and scoots closer to Benrey. The two of them are sitting atop a wall, and the ground below suddenly feels thousands of miles away. A shaking hand cups Benrey's cheek, and it feels as though he's been electrocuted. He's aware, so very aware now, of Gordon's skin against his (his hands are calloused, always have been, and yet the way he holds Benrey is so soft, so gentle.) Dark eyes flit around, trying to look at anywhere except for Benrey's own eyes. (Not that he blamed him. Benrey can't meet Gordon's gaze, either.)
But it would be fine, right? They were best friends. They've known each other for years! They've gone through so much together! Yet the fear that this struck into Benrey's heart made him long for some broken support beam in an abandoned building, or some arrogant jackass from Gordon's class that wanted to pick a fight. At least there, Benrey knew what to do. But a kiss is completely uncharted territory.
But they were best friends. So it wouldn't be weird, right? Right.
The silence between them is palpable--reach out and stretch it like taffy. Gordon takes another deep breath.
"I'm, uh. Going to… yeah."
He leans in closer. Oh god they were really close together. Oh god they were actually doing this. Oh god Gordon was about to fucking kiss him.
Benrey's eyes go wide when he feels Gordon's lips press to his. No, wait, you're not supposed to have your eyes open, right? After a moment, Benrey lets his eyes flutter closed.
It's… a strange sensation. After all, he's not used to having his lips pushed against anything. Every nerve in his body feels like it's lighting up, but especially the ones in his lips. Every place where Gordon's lips even brush against Benrey's own feels alive and sparking. He can feel the heat rolling off of Gordon's blushing face--or maybe it was his own. He couldn't tell. And, if he was being honest, he didn't really care.
There isn't dramatic camera angles or swelling music. No fireworks, or anything like that. It's just them. It's just Gordon. And he's better than any music or song could ever hope to describe.
The hand on Benrey's cheek still trembles slightly, but it shifts to better hold Benrey's jaw in his palm, to better hold on to his face. Benrey tenses slightly when he feels Gordon's other hand rest on his shoulder, but relaxes soon after. Benrey's hands aren't sure where to go, and they wander, aimless, until they settle on Gordon's arms. Gordon's lips part just slightly, and Benrey swears that he melts right then and there. The other's lips were soft, very soft, and they tasted like that morning's coffee.
… It feels right. There's just something that feels so right about this. They're so close, connected, holding on to each other. Suddenly Benrey understands those movies a little more, but he still doesn't understand the swelling music. The silence between them is the only backing track that they need.
Even as the kiss breaks, their lips linger, almost reluctant to part. But Gordon suddenly pulls away, blushing more red than Benrey had ever seen before in his life.
"W-we're never talking about this again."
Benrey couldn't really respond, as a flow of pink Sweet Voice fills the air around them.
And they didn't talk about it again.
(But that couldn't stop Benrey from dreaming of the day that they could do it again.)
