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Chapter Text

Ibuki Ueoka

Ibuki wasn’t really sure what happened. One moment Natsusa was fine, joking around and bullying him like usual; the next, he was lying on his back looking like even breathing was painful.

Everything had been going fine. Ibuki, Natsusa and Sei were all enjoying their evening, playing cards and eating junk food like any other day. Then, after a while, Sei decided to leave, and Natsusa and Ibuki were the only ones left in the small dorm. Natsusa was curled up on the couch, scrolling through his phone, and Ibuki was starting to make some ramen when it happened. Natsusa’s muscles tensed, and his phone clattered to the floor.

Ibuki, gearing the noise, turned and started to ask, “Natsusa, you al-“ when he saw the other lying on the floor, face down and shaking. Ibuki gasped, running to the others side, turning him over and asking what was wrong. Only two words were ground out of the quivering boy, but they answered all questions in Ibuki’s mind. “Cervical. Hernia.” Immediately, Ibuki lifted Natsusa up and carried him to the bed, the boy tense in his arms, clearly unable to move.

He gently lay him down on the bed, making sure he was in a comfortable position. Natsusa’s eyes were screwed shut against the pain, but his eyes were still watering, despite his efforts.

Ibuki, remembering Sei’s instructions in case a time like this ever arose, quickly got a towel to soak in cold water to put around Natsusa’s neck. After returning and gently lifting the other boy’s neck, cringing at the wince of pain, he did just that.

“I’ll call Sei, okay?” he asked , not really expecting an answer. As he turned to get his phone, a small, broken voice quietly called out, “No. Don’t call him. H-he’s probably just got home.” Ibuki’s heart ached for his friend, knowing that he was the cause for his pain. “Are you sure? I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.” In response, he got a surprisingly bitter voice in return, but still broken with pain. “‘M sure. S-sei has looked after me f-far too much already. He’s the one who s-stayed with me in the hospital the whole time.”

After that, a silence remained between the two friends, not awkward nor comfortable, one not knowing what to say, the other in too much pain to think about it. Ibuki sat at Natsusa’s side for a few hours, before warming up some food, half of which he fed to Natsusa and the other for himself. After that, he loosely held Natsusa’s hand, it was completely loose in his hand, until a few hours later, when some grip had returned , the slightest pressure being applied to Ibuki’s own fingers. Ten minutes later, he finally worked up the courage to ask what he had wanted to since Natsusa found him at the club.

“What happed to you in the crash, exactly?” Natsusa huffed a small breath, “Finally got the balls to ask, idiot?” After another long breath, he began. “When we crashed, I was thrown the opposite direction from you. I’m not sure exactly what happened, but I know that I hit the ground really hard, and shattered the right side of my hip, and my whole right leg.”

Ibuki gawked, saying, “I thought you only hurt your neck!”

Natsusa scoffed, “As if. If that was the case, I wouldn’t have to have done so much rehab. I would’ve been out in a few months. But yes, I also hurt my neck. Supposedly, I broke it, but it was just a hairline fracture, and the disk in my neck got all messed up because of that.”

Ibuki was clutching his hand so tight that the circulation was being cut off. “B-but what did they do about your hip and leg? You said that they shattered, how did they fix it?”

Natsusa sighed. “They were going to amputate it, but my family and Sei fought against that. The doctors finally decided to try their best, and it worked out well enough.”

Ibuki frowned. “‘Well enough’? What does that mean?”

His friend began to stretch a little as feeling returned to his limbs. “It means that in my right leg I can’t feel anything.”

Ibuki swallowed dryly as Natsusa sat up and told him, “I’m alright now, I can leave in five minutes. That’s for the help.” “It’s no problem. I can take you home if you want.” Natsusa nodded in affirmation and stood up on wobbly legs, and after a few practice steps, got his bag and went out the door with Ibuki on his tail.

Chapter Text

If you asked him, Natsusa would admit he was nervous. It had been seven months since he had been to school, and hadn’t seen his friends that whole time. He wasn’t even sure if they were still his friends, since he was no longer on the rugby team. In fact, he was scared that they would hate him for leaving the team (even though that wasn’t his choice), and for undoubtedly being the reason one of their star players left.

He stared down at his hand, (his useless hand that would never be used to play rugby again), a numb feeling creeping across it. He flexed it, trying to tighten it into a fist, but it remained shaking and loosely held. He glared at it, hating his body for becoming so useless.

“Feeling numb?” He was pulled out of his musings by Sei asking him a question, wearing a concerned expression under his mask of calm.

“Just a little,” he was quick to reassure, but Sei remained worried, knowing how the numbness made his best friend feel. He decided to keep a close watch on Natsusa the whole day, just to be sure he could cope with the level of activity in the school.

As they continued their walk to the campus, Natsusa was getting more and more frustrated. He was already exhausted by the walk so far, and he had no idea how he was going to get through the day. Sei, looking at his friend, saw beads of sweat rolling down his neck, and immediately question if the other was alright.

“I’m fine, Sei,” Natsusa replied with a (fake) smile. “I just haven’t done this much walking in a while.”

Sei walked him into his class, and only left after a clear dismissal. Natsusa let out a sigh at his friend’s protectiveness, and then collected himself, taking a seat at one of the tables.

As he sat down, relieved that he could get off his feet for a while, a boy one year younger who he knew in high school, Fuuga Saito, ran up to him, sweating like crazy. Natsusa cringed as the smelly liquid pooled on his desk, while the other boy was yelling happily that he was back.

Natsusa was surprised by the reaction Saito was having because of his return, but he was mostly disgusted by the horrible stench wafting off him.

“But,” Saito suddenly looked around, as if remembering where they were, “What’re you doing here? This is the first years class.” Natsusa smiled lightly, saying, “Well, I got held back a year, so I have to redo my first year.”

Sobering up at the reminder of what happened, Saito quietly asked him, “How are you, really? Things must have been tough, the past few months. There were a lot of rumours, but only a few of us actually know what happened. Some people thought you just decided to quit.” Natsusa smiled again, trying to cover up all the hatred and sadness he was feeling, and just answered that he was doing pretty well, all things considered.

At that moment, a mop of burgundy hair made its way to the row in front of him. Natsusa smiled and called him. “Hey, Yasunari! Long time!” The other boy just looked at him with a scowl before getting up from the table he was going to sit at, in front of Natsusa, and moving to the other side of the room.

His smile melted of his face as his heart sank. He knew he should have expected it, but it still hurt that people were mad that he stopped playing. He, too, was mad at himself, so he couldn’t blame them. It was his whole life, what he dreamt and breathed, before it was so suddenly and painfully ripped from him.

Yasunari on the other hand, was furious. How dare he, how dare he just walk in here like nothing happened ! His ex rugby rival had just walked through his class door and said “hey” to him like they were old friends. Of course he had a right to be furious. But still, he was curious as to what had happened. As far as he and the rest of the team knew, Natsusa had gotten hurt and was in the hospital for a while, and Ibuki quit because of that. It never made any sense to them, but Sei refused to answer any of their questions, saying that Natsusa would answer when he came back. Apparently, that took practically a year to happen. He and the rest of the team had been too curious (concerned) to leave it at that, so they stole Sei’s phone and read his texts to Natsusa. They were shocked, to say the least. Though why wasn’t clear why, it was obvious that Natsusa couldn’t play rugby anymore, if the millions of complaints were something to go by. That and the fact that Natsusa was heartbroken were painfully clear. After that, they stopped asking about him.

Yasunari had been expecting to see a sad Natsusa, one who was tearful and depressed. He was even prepared for it. What he had not expected was to see a joyous one, who was smiling happily. If it weren’t for the signs of exhaustion, the lingering look of loneliness and bitterness, Yasunari could almost believe that this was the Natsusa who could still play rugby, who took joy in every moment on the field.

He shook the thoughts from his mind when the professor walked in. He had to focus on keeping his grades up, not his pathetic looking ex rival.

At the other end of the class, Natsusa made a resolution. He had to pass this class, no matter what. He couldn’t be held back a year again, no matter what. He would do whatever it took, even if he had to get Sei to write things for him when he couldn’t, but he needed to graduate.

He picked up his pen as the lecture started, and decided that even if he had to forsake rugby from his life to do it, he would pass this class.

He couldn’t do it.