Work Text:
Clamor - ‘a loud uproar, as from a crowd of people’
- Warning: Shadowbringers 5.2 Spoilers -
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“We’re going to be heroes! Real Warriors of Light!”
“There’s so much to see out there! And the rest of the world needs our help too! Not just the Crystarium and Lakeland.”
“Who better than to go than us? It’s what any good hero would do!”
Katsum could hardly believe her eyes. The sheer number of guardsmen gathered in front of the Crystarium was frightening enough as she worried something had happened, but to hear that they wished to leave their posts - their homes - to venture off on a journey across Norvrandt to become…Warriors of Light…her heart dropped to the floor. Her entire body froze as she listened to the clamor of their voices, their righteous and good hearts set on following a path into the unknown for the sake of others and of the glory of being a hero to people. She remembered she too once spoke of such things a long…long time ago. Her body shuddered involuntarily, the fur on her tail and ears standing on end, her hands clenched into fists.
She must have gone rigid as she felt a hand on her shoulder and Alphinaud’s voice rang in her ear, “Are you alright, Katsum…?” When she did not answer nor even look at him, she felt his grip on her shoulder tighten a little before he let go. She felt the eyes of the other Scions turn to her as well as the Exarch worried expression out of the corner of her eye, but she could not bring herself to tear her gaze away from them. From the souls who were willing walking towards a path that many of them would fall upon…
“It’s you!” A voice drew her attention, her gaze turning to the Rogeden guard known as Vonrad, “The Warrior of the Night!”
It was good to hear that her wish to not be known as the Warrior of “Darkness” had finally been noted, but she couldn’t even bring herself to smile as she stared back at them with a shocked expression. He and his friend, Theyler, seemed to pay it no mind as they stepped up to her.
“You understand don’t you?” Vonrad continued, “Someone’s got to protect this place once you’re gone. We just want to be ready for when that time comes.”
Theyler nods, “And not only here, but everywhere! Which is why we’ve got to get out there and lend a hand to those in need,” He gestured to her, “That’s what you did, isn’t it? Even it was just…little things at first, you helped people!”
Katsum was speechless, and her eyes widened. The two men in front of her began to fade in her minds eye and instead stood a little Miqo’te girl with blonde hair and bright, sparkling blue eyes.
“One day, I’m gonna go out and see the world! I’ll help people and get stronger, and I’ll tell everyone our stories of our island!” Katsum began to shake, her ears falling back as she drew in a shaking breath as she remembered what she once said, “And when I come home, I’ll tell you and Mommy all about my adventures!”
“Please…”
A drop of something warm rolled down her cheek, rolling down her face and falling to the ground, the sound of it seeming to ring in her cat-like ears. The crowd around her went silent, all eyes turning towards her.
“Do not follow this path I walk…”
She grimaced at how weak her voice sounded, but she was too distraught to care, looking into the shocked expression of Vonrad and Theyler and then to the others behind them as she felt the tears roll steadily down her face. She took a shaking breath, trying to gather herself and what she wished - no, had - to say.
“Your hearts are pure and good, wanting to help others and save the world, but please don’t leave your homes behind. Your families and loved ones…” A few of the faces in the crowd seemed to shift with a realization with this, and Katsum pushed further, “Who will protect them while you are gone? Saving the world is all well and good, but if you’ve no home to return to…there is no glory worth losing those you love for…”
Seeing them all stare at her in such bewilderment, she knew she had their attention. She had to make this count. With a shaking breath, Katsum took a few steps forward, lifting her voice to speak out to all of them, “When I was young…I-I wanted the same things you speak of now. To be an adventurer and to see the worlds that lie past the shores of my home island. I was just a young heiress then…a young girl wanting nothing more than to experience the things she’d only ever heard stories about…to be a hero like in all those legends and fairy tales… just like you all say now.”
Her eyes turned to the ground as she reached up and lifted her cornet off of her head, looking down at it sadly, “And then I was chosen…my dragon chose me to be my kingdom’s next ruler…to be the protector of my people, to be their hero…and I…I didn’t want it.”
Her grip on the crown tightened as her ears fell back on her head, “I was young and naive, and I had no business leading a kingdom and I knew that. I would run from my responsibilities, begging for a way out, for things to go back to the way that they were so I would not be saddled with the weight of a kingdom on my shoulders. And I was so focused on the world beyond and wanting to no longer be responsible for it…that I did not see the enemies hiding in the shadows…right in plain sight…”
She closed her eyes as a few more tears spilled over, “I prayed one night for it to all just end…and it did. My kingdom was attacked that night…and I was powerless to stop an invasion that wiped away all that I loved in a single night…Everything and everyone I had ever known was gone…and I alone ran and escaped on a small boat with the help of my parents…yet even them…I left behind…”
Tears streamed steadily as she turned the coronet and placed it back on her head, crowning herself with its weight once more, “I have walked this path everyday since to redeem my worth to myself, pledging my strength to those in need as I could not save my people before them.” She lifted her gaze again and looked around at the many faces staring back at her and pleaded, “This path is grim and dangerous. It is lonely and devastating as you watch those around you fall, and no matter how strong you are, you are powerless to stop it…and there is truly nothing more devastating than to return to your beloved home…and find it silent and destroyed.”
A few of the ones gathered looked at each other, some of their faces falling as their earlier excitement faded. She had gotten through to a few, though she knew that some would still take the risks, and so she wiped the tears from her eyes and tried to bring back her stoic expression, “I know…I know that I cannot stop anyone from following their hearts and I will not try to. I only ask that you consider what you leave behind before making up your mind…please…”
The crowd began to murmur amongst themselves, and even Theyler and Vonrad turned to look at each other thoughtfully. Katsum dropped her eyes again and turned to move back with the Scions again, feeling their worried gazes as she did. Her eyes met Alphianud’s when she stopped and he smiled sadly. It was nice to know that he remembered the stories she’d told him of her past in their days journeying through Dravania and the Mists.
He nodded to her encouragingly, smiling as best he could in his sadness, “You did well. Now it is up to them to decide their paths. But you did well.”
The kind words were true indeed, yet they did not ease her soul as much as she was sure he’d hoped. Still, a small smile broke through on her lips and she nodded, “For those we have lost…and those we can yet save.”