Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It wasn’t often that Loki would sit around with his brother and his merry band of heroes as he celebrated a job well done with mead and good food, but something about this particular venture had left him in high spirits and he too felt like celebrating.

Granted, he wasn’t drinking as much as Thor, given his nature he wasn’t one to get drunk and lose sense of who he was, he preferred to be coherent and aware of his surroundings but a drink here or there wouldn’t do any harm.

Thor, however, was less cautious about his intake.

In fact, the stronger the mead, the better in his eyes.

Though it took some digging around for Stark, he tracked down one that satisfied Thor’s tastes and kept it stocked for his visits, totally not because he wanted to indulge in something a little stronger himself from time to time.

“To our victory!” Thor cried, holding up a tankard that Tony had also supplied after the God mentioned that Midgardian cups weren’t vast enough.

The small group who lingered cheered, clanked drinks together and promptly started down the hill of inebriation.

Loki looked forward to the morning, where he would tease them for not only the injuries sustained during their recent outing but also for their hangovers.

He wasn’t here to make friends, after all.

So, as he sipped his generous helping of wine and listen to them go over the details of the job together, Loki set about planning a morning of absolute Hell for them.

Unsurprisingly, the shield, the widow and the monster didn’t stick around for long, despite how entertaining he thought the night would be if they stuck around.

‘A foolish thought,’ he said to himself, ‘they aren’t fun.’

It was coming towards nine when the merriment was becoming more, the food had been consumed and everyone left over was reaching a peak on stomachs full of a good meal and strong drinks.

Thor, Stark and the arrow were regaling each other with growing exasperations on their parts in the job, which had taken a week and some to finish.

Loki had started to grow bored and was beginning to make plans on leaving once his glass was empty, especially now that the phone calls that interrupted the evening had come to a stop, meaning he had nothing to eavesdrop on.

From the corner of his eye, he noticed a movement and turned his head in time to catch one of the workers coming out of the office to stand behind the railing a platform above where they stood, her arms leaning against the metal railing.

“Mr. Stark,” she called down, making everyone’s attention shift towards her.

“Oh, you’re still here?” He replied, somehow managing to not slur his words.

“I’m just finishing up, I’ve checked over the last report and I’m about to send it off, I just wanted to make sure there was nothing else you needed me to do.”

“No, you’re all good.”

She gave a faint smile and nodded before retreating again.

Once the door clicked shut, Stark shook his head and let out an exaggerated sigh.

“Poor girl, only ever seems to work, doesn’t she ever want fun?”

He said this, then lifted his near empty cup to his lips.

“Perhaps she is lonely,” Thor suggested, “have you ever seen her with a partner?”

The others, bar Loki, stopped and shrugged, shaking their heads.

“She’s never mentioned anyone, not even friends,” Hawkeye said.

“That is a shame, perhaps we should find her a partner.”

Loki rolled his eyes and let out a long sigh, giving his brother a withered look.

“Not everyone needs a partner, some are happy alone.”

Thor looked at Loki, his expression unreadable but he guessed that was because Thor’s intoxicated brain hadn’t clicked into place yet.

“Of course,” Thor nodded, “I’m just saying that love can be great and we could help, we’d see a change in no time!”

“And not everyone falls in love over a wet weekend,” Loki commented, lifting his glass to take a sip.

The dirty expression he got from his brother made him smirk and chuckle lightly.

“I bet you could make it happen.”

Loki’s eyebrow quirked and he lowered his glass.

“Pardon?”

“You’re a charming man, Loki,” Thor grinned, ignoring the scoff that came from Stark, “if anyone could charm her ‘over a wet weekend’ it could be you.”

“Are you challenging me?”

“If I were?”

He leaned back in his seat, taking a long breath through his nose as his eyes flickered towards the closed door, his fingers beginning to drum upon the tabletop.

Eventually, he leveled an infamous smile to those at the table and gave a slow nod.

“I would ask you to name your wager.”

Chapter Text

Twisting the key in the lock, my office door clicks open and I step into the room, a cold drink and a packed toasted bagel in hand, ready to start another day of office monkey work.

I’d been working in the Avengers Tower for nearing a year, taking over some duties from Miss Potts to take some pressure off of her so that she could ease whatever tension was happening between her and Mr. Stark.

I never pried, their personal business was none of mine, I just applied for the healthy wage that definitely pushed me into leaving my old dead-end job.

Could I say I was qualified? No, but the job had proven easier than I had anticipated and I hadn’t been fired or reprimanded at any point so all’s well that ends well.

Besides, my job mostly consisted of leaning back and proof-reading their statements of their latest jobs, making sure stories line up and blanks are filled, as well as editing basic mistakes that could be overlooked before sending them off to the higher authority and whichever department would need the information.

What I read was deeply fascinating and made me extremely thankful to not be a hero, screw all that pressure.

It was also interesting to dive deep into their thoughts on what they had to do.

Some were explicit and didn’t hold back in their opinions, while others kept everything strictly professional. The contrast was hilarious.

Sometimes I’d play a game with myself where I’d try not to look at who I have picked and will try to guess whose report it is based on the first paragraph.

Small things please small minds as they say.

Beyond reading their reports and compiling everything, I knew nothing further about any of the heroes.

I liked to keep my private and professional lives separate and they seemed to prefer keeping workers as acquaintances rather than friends.

The only one who ever seemed friendlier than that was Peter, who I couldn’t help but chat with and greet with a warm smile, he was adorable and I enjoyed helping him out with the formatting of his reports.

Not that he couldn’t do them, more that there was a very specific way they had to be done which couldn’t be straightforward, that would be too easy.

Sitting down at my desk, I dropped my bag onto the floor and nudged it beneath with my foot before tucking my chair in while adjusting my cardigan.

Pressing my thumb to a scanning pad on my desk, I wait for my screen to boot up and ask for further confirmation that it was me trying to access my secure files.

Mr. Stark’s technological advances always astounded me, the genius that surrounded me was more than a little intimidating but being able to use tech created by the Tony Stark was an incomparable perk of the job.

The screen turned blue and I barely had to blink before the icons popped up to alert me that I had four reports to read through, which was already two less than I had anticipated.

“Hm,” I hummed to myself, tapping the first box that was flashing for attention to load the content, “good thing I brought a book for extra time.”

The bottom left corner of the document showed that I have nine pages to read on this single document, including any possible edits, I estimated that it would take me about forty-five minutes to an hour to check over and a little longer if I needed to call anyone to ask questions for specifics.

“Easy enough,” I shrugged, opening the bag and taking out my breakfast bagel before having a sip from my much needed drink. “Let’s do this.”

Three hours later, I leaned back in my seat and rubbed my eyes to release the strain that had been building up behind them.

The first two reports had taken longer than I had anticipated, mostly because I did end up calling around to get minor but very important details that needed to be added in for clarity, lest I get a shirty email back telling me that I, not the original author, was an idiot.

Dropping my head back, I closed my eyes and let out a long sigh.

“I think I need a break,” I mumbled.

Sitting back up, I locked my screen and pushed my chair back just as a knock sounded at the door.

Quirking my eyebrow, I looked to the door and rested my hands on the arms of my swivel chair.

“Come in.”

The door opened soon after and Loki stepped inside, his imposing figure taking up the doorway.

I blinked in surprise, of all my colleagues he was the one who I had the least interaction with and that was really saying something.

From what I could gather, we both preferred our own company and I’d never talked to him on a personal basis before, so this had to be important.

“Can I help you?” I asked, resting my hands in my lap.

“Perhaps,” he replied.

“Okay, with what?”

He stepped closer, his hands hidden behind his back.

Truthfully, it was a little intimidating, I’d never been this close to the God before.

Of course I knew of his reputation and a few opinions that others had of him being accepted within the Tower, but I didn’t know what was truth and what was rumour.

Though there was one thing I couldn’t deny, he was definitely quite imposing when you’re sat in a chair and he’s stood at his full height.

“I feel I may have made a mistake in my report,” he started, giving an almost embarrassed smile.

“And you came to see me about it?”

“The young spider may have mentioned that you were the one to deal with such things.”

“He would be right,” I nodded, leaning back in my seat and crossing my arms, “but usually I would contact you if I needed anything.”

“I see, I shall take a note for next time, should I be foolish again.”

I laughed and shook my head.

“It’s not foolish to make a mistake, Mr. Odinson.”

He paused, briefly looking away before turning back to me, giving me the distinct feeling that I had perhaps said something wrong.

“Loki would be fine,” he eventually said with a small smile. “So, may I check as I’m already here?”

“Sure,” I shrugged, turning my chair towards my desk to lean forward and unlock it once again, “it’s your report after all.”

Once I had loaded up his document, I grabbed my bag from beneath my desk then stood up and indicated to him that he was welcome to take my seat.

“Well, you’re welcome to get reading while I grab a drink.”

He looked to me before slowly taking my seat, acting as if it were about to bite him.

“You aren’t worried about me snooping?”

“No,” I shook my head, setting the bag atop the desk to rifle through for my purse, “I’d know if you were snooping and everything is locked tight.”

After finding my card and carelessly dropping my purse back into the bag, I set my bag back down and gave him a smile, “So, have fun and I’ll be back in a little bit.”

Turning towards the door, I take a few steps before turning back towards him.

“Would you like anything?”

Loki looked away from the screen, his expression one of thought before he nodded slowly and gave me another faint, almost uncertain smile.

“Some tea would be wonderful, thank you.”

I nodded, giving him a small salute before stepping out, trying to push the thought of the invader in my office to one side.

No one ever came for a casual report check-up and certainly no one had ever sat at my desk before, the last person I expected to be in that seat was a Norse God I had never exchanged a word with until just now.

What a strange day it was proving to be.

Chapter Text

My strange day proved to be more than just a one-off chance.

A day and a half had passed without further incident.

He ignored me and I ignored everyone unless called upon specifically, it was good.

Then on Wednesday afternoon, he showed up again and lingered around like a bad smell.

Not saying anything or doing anything, he just stood at the window and watched the world go by with his hands behind his back, one hand clasping the opposite wrist akin to the pose he had taken on Monday.

On Thursday afternoon, I waltzed my way into my office after lunch, feeling refreshed and ready (read: Overfull with a sore stomach) for another round of reports only to find that Loki had taken residence on my two seater in the corner, one leg propped up against the other with one of my books resting open against the propped leg.

He looked up and caught me standing there, staring at him.

“You left your door unlocked,” he said by way of answer.

“So you invited yourself in?”

“Of course, it was quiet and you have books, what more do I need?”

“Permission, maybe?”

“Such a trivial thing when it doesn’t come to important matters,” he sighed before looking back at the book.

“Like my privacy?”

“Do you truly get privacy in a place this chaotic?”

I admit, he had me stumped.

So, I sat down at my computer and continued my work as he read the book he’d effectively stolen.

In a way, it was kind of comfortable once I settled into it.

I finished my report minutes before my shift ended.

I saved the documents, sent them off and then shut down the computer with a loaded but happy sigh and a little tippy-tap of my fingers atop the desk as I pushed my chair back.

“Quit time,” I said to myself, forgetting that Loki was there until he looked up and let out a small hum.

“I suppose that’s my cue to leave as well,” he commented.

Standing from his perch, he closed the book and set it on the arm of the two-seater.

“You can take that with you, if you wish,” I said.

Loki looked down at it then looked back at me with a smile.

“I think I’ll save it for tomorrow.”

And he stuck to his word, the next day he returned to continue reading and that was our new routine for the next week.

For reasons I could probably never comprehend, he had decided that my office was the ideal place to hang out when nothing else was happening.

It wasn’t exactly the kind of office that screamed ‘welcome’ to guests, but he seemed to enjoy that and took some kind of solace in the fact that it was a private room without it being intimidatingly secure beyond my protected computer.

Most of the time he let me work without saying a word, instead choosing to occupy himself with wandering around to look at the sparse decorations on my shelves and the titles in my bookcase, which he’d also taken open invitation into plucking out and reading.

The only time he would interrupt me was when he had a question about something, like where I had got a specific item or if I had a recommendation for him.

Truthfully, it was starting to get a little wholesome.

On Friday afternoon, after all was said and done, we entered the elevator together and rode down to the ground floor.

My fingers were clasped around the strap of my bag and Loki’s fingers were linked in front of his waist as we rode in silence.

Eventually, he turned just a little to look down at me.

“Do you have any weekend plans?”

I looked up at him and slowly shook my head.

“I rarely do,” I replied.

“No friends?”

“Oh, I have friends, but they live quite far away so we plan our get togethers.”

“You must miss them.”

“I do,” I nodded, “but we talk regularly in other ways so it’s not too bad.”

“Good, lack of communication breaks down even the strongest of barriers.”

I snickered and nodded again.

“How about you? What are your weekend plans?”

Loki took a moment to think, taking a deep breath as he shrugged.

“I suppose doing as I always do, trying to avoid Thor’s incessant persistence in getting me outside while enjoying my own company.”

I couldn’t stop myself from laughing and Loki smiled along with me.

“You two really are something special.”

“You think so?”

“From what I’ve seen and what I’ve heard when he talks about you, I would say definitely.”

The elevator reached its seemingly never-ending descent to the final floor and the doors opened with a high-pitched ting.

Loki stepped to one side, allowing me to leave first while he trailed behind me as we both left the glitzy foyer and entered the chilling air.

“Well,” I said, fishing out my headphones from my bag and untangling them, “I shall see you on Monday.”

“Yes, bright and early.”

We both smiled, lingering for a moment before turning in opposite directions and going our separate ways.

Chapter Text

True to his word, Loki returned on Monday, though more in the afternoon than the morning, to invade and take up my seat.

Luckily, I had plenty of work to focus on, so I didn’t need my small couch, a dilemma we had yet to encounter.

Apparently over the weekend there had been an attack, just a small one but a big enough threat to warrant two people to show up and deal with it.

However, that didn’t mean any less paperwork and files to go through and send off for me.

I wouldn’t have had my break if Loki hadn’t left and returned with a little boxed salad and a bottle of tropical juice.

Tuesday was barely better, though thankfully not as hectic.

I did have to bring Peter into my office once he arrived after school to finalise some details but otherwise, I spent most of my time on the phone, chasing around people and small but vital details.

Loki continued to read, having the occasional conversation with Peter as I edited the document to prepare for send-off.

All in all, it was a wholesome day, watching those two interact was strangely adorable.

Behind his façade of uncaring snobbery, Loki was a surprisingly sweet guy who could obviously care for others despite the cold front he liked to put up.

It seemed that it wasn’t only his hands that were deceptively cold.

Too bad that Peter seemed to pull him out of his icy demeanour and got him to show his more playful side, not just the charming taunting one that he liked to present to me.

A strange side to him that I couldn’t deny made me feel a little giddy, even if I wasn’t into him, I could fully admit that Loki was an attractive God and his personality matched his looks so perfectly that he became the most devastating kind of being.

The kind who could kill you with a smile and then kill you again with a knife after gaining your trust.

The perfect spy.

No wonder they used him for such missions.

There was no denying the fact that Loki’s mission transcripts were some of the most interesting ones, he definitely lived up to his nature.

The God could lie his way into a dead stranger’s will.

The duo undercover reports were a thrill a minute sometimes, depending on who was paired with who.

I’d read a few in the past where Loki was paired with Natasha and they could be a wild ride from start to finish.

The pair didn’t get on particularly well, that was no secret, but they worked together well enough to get the job done.

And it was that dynamic duo who got called out on Wednesday, leaving me alone in my office.

Although it had been a short amount of time, the office already felt empty without Loki’s silent presence lingering on my seat, the only sounds stopping the room from total silence being my tapping of keys and his occasional turning of pages.

Admittedly, it was lonely.

I’d become so accustomed to him being there in a matter of days that now it felt wrong to be alone, even if I still lightly preferred it.

Throwing myself into work was an easy way to distract myself from the lack of distraction, though I did find my eyes flickering to the book I’d brought along that morning, one I had intended to recommend to Loki with an enthusiasm I didn’t get to exude often in this job.

So, I was once again sat by myself, proofreading a load of reports as the world went on beyond the door, a little part of me waiting for Loki’s return.

But only a small part.

Chapter Text

A week and a half passed before I saw Loki again.

The mission had gone on longer than anyone expected, but they had managed to close the case before two weeks were up and returned early in the AM while everyone else was asleep.

Walking in a couple of hours later had been a pleasant surprise.

Though I’d never say it out loud and tried to play it off calmly in front of others, I was excited to see him back and healthy, casually enjoying a joke with some of the other Avengers while standing in the foyer.

His relationship with most of the group had grown closer since his arrival, the coldness of his first few months in the group had thawed and it seemed that genuine friendships had taken place.

I was happy for him, walking into work and seeing him forcefully isolated made me feel bad for him.

Granted, he preferred his own company more often than not, but I knew from experience that choosing your own isolation and having it forced upon you were two entirely different things and too many people would deny participating in the latter.

I hadn’t realised just how deep I considered this budding friendship between Loki and myself until I saw him stood there, smiling and conversing with the crowd.

My stomach flipped uncomfortably when I saw him and a bubble of excitement grew inside of me in a way that hadn’t happened since I was in school and saw my best friend walk through the door.

That cemented it that Loki’s forced company had become something mutual between us.

Not wishing to interrupt, I head towards the elevators and tried to keep as low a profile as possible, though kept continuously glancing towards Loki.

At one point, he must have noticed my movement and glanced towards me, taking a minute to click that it was me before giving me a dashing smile.

My heartrate might have sped up a little and I gave him a little wave, happy to see that he was as pleased to see me as I was him.

I turned back towards the elevator just in time for the doors to open with a soft ding, a handful of people stepping out and rushing off to wherever their job called for them to be while I stepped inside and pressed the button to my floor.

I’d barely straightened myself when I caught Loki sliding in between the closing door, making them slide open again before finally closing and encasing us both inside together.

“You didn’t need to stop talking,” I said upon reaching the third floor, the silence growing torturous despite having no atmosphere.

“And ignore my friend? How rude do you think I am?”

I smiled, shifting on my feet.

“You think we’re friends?”

“Do you not?” He asked, turning towards me with a soft frown.

I glanced back at him and shook my head before panicking and nodding quickly, huffing a little laugh.

“I would like to think we are,” I replied.

We both smiled at one another and then turned our attention to the elevator doors, basking in the blissful nothingness of a mutual relationship.

As my fingers played with the straps of my bag, I remembered the book that I had been keeping in my office for when he returned and a bubble of excitement built up in my stomach, a true cinch within our friendship being something I enjoyed that I could offer to share with him.

Were friendships supposed to build this quickly?

I hadn’t had the chance to make a new friend since college, what with my job keeping me busy and my habit of shutting out the world when I got home made it hard to meet new people unless it was online and even then, I tried to keep relationships at a distance.

I had my select few friends that I enjoyed talking to and didn’t seek out anything more, so Loki’s ability of worming his way into my affection had taken me by surprise when I had actually stopped to think about it.

“I do hope you didn’t miss me too much.”

Loki smirked down at me coyly, making me smile and roll my eyes, playfully avoiding eye contact.

“Not at all, it’s been very peaceful without you.”

“My, I’m almost hurt.”

“Then next time I’ll make sure it actually does.”

“You truly wound me.”

“Not yet,” I smiled, stepping out as the doors opened with a ding, “but I will.”

Chapter Text

I looked up at him with a raised eyebrow, distracted entirely from the document I was reading as my brain shut down.

“Huh?”

“You heard me,” he repeated with a soft sigh, “I was wondering if you’re accompany me to a party this Friday.”

“What? But you don’t even like parties.”

“No,” he said slowly with a small nod, “but it’s different when they’re being held in my honour for an astounding mission.”

Two idle weeks had passed by as if he had never left, everyone was focused on working their asses off to finalise the mission details and get everything sorted so that baddies could be caught and interrogated further.

Once things had settled, congratulations were in place for everyone who had played their part in sealing the information that finally brought down a long-standing threat to many governments.

I smiled and rolled my eyes, looking back to the loaded document.

“In your honour, huh? How can I possibly say no?”

“Infallible logic, so I shall pick you up and seven? Or would a little later be better?”

“I didn’t even say yes,” I laughed.

“No, but I assumed you’d wish to join, so be sure to wear something fancy but still casual.”

Even though I was shaking my head, I couldn’t fight down a smile that made my cheeks ache.

“Yeah, yeah, I have a smart suit I wear to hearings where I have to give evidence and claims over the doc-”

“I said fancy, not boring,” he sighed, “I wish to see you with some flair, it’s a party, not a board room meeting.”

“Okay,” I said, throwing my hands up while flopping back in my seat, “I’ll see what I can do by Friday, but can you please let me focus on this? It’s urgent, according to Tony’s voice message.”

“Of course, now you’ve agreed I have no reason to bother you.”

He smiled at me in a way that screamed ‘victory’ and turned back towards his usual seat, hands held behind his back in his usual scheming way.

Silence befell us once again as he picked up his borrowed book, which he seemed to be taking a longer time than usual with and continued reading as I carried on with my editing.

Once again, time passed far too quickly for my liking now that I had company at work that I enjoyed and all too soon it was time to part ways once again, giving our usual farewells and going our separate ways.

We hadn’t been apart for long before my phone rang, a rare occurrence in itself.

It wasn’t Loki, not that I had expected it to be, but a small part of me had hoped that maybe he had spontaneously decided that he wished to meet outside of a work function, not that I remembered ever sharing numbers with him.

In fact, I wasn’t entirely sure he even knew how to work his company provided phone beyond basic functions.

With a fond smile, I swiped to the ‘answer’ option and lifted my phone to my ear.

“It’s been a while, stranger.”

“I know, I’m super sorry, life just grabbed me by the balls and wouldn’t let go.”

I laughed, shaking my head as I scuffed my feet against some loose stones as I walked.

“Not bad for someone who doesn’t have any.”

“I’m borrowing Gabe’s.”

“Ah, be sure to give them back as you found them.”

“He won’t miss them.”

I scoffed another laugh and smiled widely.

It had been a while since I’d heard from her and even longer since I’d seen her, especially now that she had moved back to her hometown.

We would occasionally get a chance to visit one another when work and life wasn’t hectic, but the occurrence was becoming rarer and rarer as we got older.

Adult life sucked sometimes.

“It’s been way too long,” she said wistfully, clicking into my thoughts in a way only she ever could.

“Well yeah, you went off and got married, so rude.”

“I know, I’m so sorry.”

My walk home consisted of long catch-up conversations and laughter as we shared stories, making time fly by in a way that had become so familiar since I had befriended Loki.

It seemed that what they said was true, time does fly when you’re having fun.

Before I knew it, I was stepping up to my front door and fishing out the keys from my pocket with my free hand.

“Well, it’s been fun,” I sighed, juggling through the collection to find the right one, “I don’t wish to take up anymore of your precious marriage time.”

“Please,” she scoffed, “I have years stuck with him, I want to hear about my little muffin.”

I laughed, twisting the key in the lock and stepped into my home, my warm and welcoming sanctuary.

“I don’t know why, I haven’t change since the last time you called.”

“Come on,” she whined down the line, sounding like a child, “you must have something for me, you work for THE Tony Stark, Iron Man himself!”

“It sounds more impressive than it actually is, I spend more time looking at a screen than I do him.”

“Pfft, please, there must be something.”

I scoffed another laugh, cradling the phone between my ear and shoulder as I worked to kick my shoes off after dropping my bag by the door.

Only one face sprung to mind as she continued to beg and I just knew that the minute I started talking, she would eat it up and beg for every last detail she could possibly get.

But she was my best friend and it didn’t seem right to keep any progression from her, no matter how small.

Padding my way to the kitchen, I grab hold of the phone in my hand one more and give a long and dramatic sigh, flicking the kettle on with my free hand before leaning against the counter.

“Well,” I said, sounding worn to add to the effect of her begging, “I guess I could tell you about Loki.”

Chapter Text

Friday rolled around much quicker than I could have anticipated, it almost felt like a single blink and then there I was, sitting on the edge of my couch, watching the clock hands tick towards my pick-up time.

I barely remembered anything that I had edited during work, it all became a big blur of days until the final hour before I was due to leave.

Much like when it was time to go see a movie, time slowed down in those minutes that lead up to me leaving the house, though this time I fretted more about what I looked like.

It was a party and I had a date, so that was due reason to actually consider my appearance beyond; ‘Is my hair washed? Yes? Good’.

Now I just had to hope it was smart enough while still looking casual.

“Perhaps it’s time for a wardrobe update,” I mumbled to myself.

At two minutes to the hour, my doorbell rang and my heart jumped into my throat.

It was time to rumble and I was nowhere near ready mentally.

I’d always had an aversion to parties or get togethers that mostly involved standing or sitting around and talking, I wasn’t much of a talker at the best of times and though I could be patient, I found myself getting bored without something else to distract me during long talking periods.

Sitting or standing around jabbering got old quickly, but it would be considered rude if I were to take a book or something to fiddle with as others around me chatted with only my occasional input.

However, tonight was about Loki and I wasn’t going to be the one to bring the mood down.

Practically leaping out of my seat, I grabbed my small bag and raced to the door, shutting off the lights as I left.

Pulling the door open, I’m greeted by Loki looking like the God he is, neatly squeezed into an outfit that he must have been sewn into to make it fit so perfectly to his frame.

I’ll admit, I may have drooled a little.

“Good evening,” he smiled, dipping his head slightly.

“And to you, sir.”

“Are you ready?” He asked, holding an arm to me.

“No, but I guess I have to be,” I laughed softly, linking my arm with his.

“Don’t fret,” he chuckled, walking us to the fanciest car I had ever been given the fortune of riding in, “I’m sure it’ll be a wonderful night.”

He opened the passenger’s side door and watched as I climbed in, closing it behind me before making his way to the driver’s side, sliding in smoothly.

“I didn’t know you could drive,” I said while buckling my seatbelt, looking at him with a quirked eyebrow.

“There are many things we don’t know about one another.”

“Valid point.”

I watched from the corner of my eye as he moved his hands around the dash, putting the key in the ignition and running his long fingers over wheel before moving one hand to the gear stick.

A strange bubble started to build inside me as I watched him, something about those deft had stirred something up that I hadn’t experienced with another person outside of my own imagination.

Apparently, he was also a little bit of a speed demon, whizzing through the luckily nearly empty streets as a strange Nordic band I had never heard of played over the speakers and filled the otherwise comfortable silence.

It certainly set a mood, to say the least.

We pulled up outside a bustling building just outside of the city in no time at all and I was ushered out by Loki so the valet could park his car, which I guessed was rented as I’d never seen any hint of him owning such a luxury before.

Stepping up beside me, he offered his arm again and gave me a charming smile.

Even if I was the most stubborn person in the world, I wouldn’t be able to resist Loki in that moment, so I linked my arm with his and we walked inside together, instantly being hit with a barrage of loud chatter.

Maybe I would regret this after all.

“I don’t know how many people I was expecting, but this is a lot,” I said, glancing up towards Loki.

He huffed a small laugh and nodded, “It is, but we can leave if you ever feel uncomfortable.”

“Thank you, I appreciate the thought.”

I smiled at him then looked away, admiring the hall that Tony had hired out specifically for the event as to avoid the calamity that happened the last time a party was held at the tower.

The building was the most lavish place I had been to, boasting the high ceilings of a cathedral and the staircases and velvet carpets I’d expect to see in a typical high-class theatre, the red of the carpets and gold trimmings on the curtains suiting Tony’s signature Iron Man colour pallet to a T.

There were paintings lining the long hallway that lead to the party room itself, most of them beautiful renaissance pictures that never quite made it to a museum or gallery despite being perfectly worthy of being displayed, at least in my eyes.

“This almost reminds me of home,” Loki commented, gazing at a painting of a man riding a black stallion through a battlefield.

“Charming,” I laughed softly.

“You would be surprised,” he mused before leading me into the main hall, where music soon joined the chatter and created a cacophony of a soon to be induced headache.

The room itself slotted in perfectly with the red and gold of the rooms outside, a large, elevated stage with a live band stood at the very back and there were stands on either side of the room as we entered, one serving drink and the other offering food.

A couple of clothed tables run up each side of the room, stopping just before that dancefloor that sat before the stage, some people with drinks already in hand were happily bopping along to the upbeat tunes.

Tall windows lined the room, the middle of the left-hand side offering an opening to a balcony that overlooked the grassy grounds beyond which were no doubt off limits to us guests.

Although it had been Loki’s advice, I felt far too underdressed for such a fancy place and some of the other guests had gone to more effort than I would have dared to myself, fair play to them really.

Familiar faces mixed with unfamiliar ones and I already felt out of place, most of these people I most likely knew the names of but hadn’t had the moment to meet firsthand.

Much would have been the same with Loki had he not come into my office that day.

“Relax,” he suddenly said into my ear, making me jump as his chilled breath ghosted over it, “find somewhere to sit down and I shall get us both something to drink.”

And I did just that.

As he turned away, with an imagined swish of his usual cape from my mind, and strutted towards the bar, I found a free table near the balcony doors and took a seat, bag perched in my lap.

That was where I stayed for most of my time there, Loki returned with drinks and stayed to chat for a while then wandered off to get us some food and a refill, sometimes taking longer between breaks as he got caught up talking to people.

At one point during the night he had managed to haul me up onto the dancefloor so he could show off some impressive moves, another surprise that he had up his sleeve.

Much like the days before, hours whittled by and I found myself having a genuinely good time, mingling with a few of the more familiar faces and sharing drinks with the God of Mischief who I had a developing relationship with.

It was glorious and my cheeks hurt from smiling so much.

So of course, something had to shoot me back down to my level.

Where I belonged.

Chapter Text

Like many things in my life, overhearing the cause of my own downfall had been a complete accident.

After hours of dancing, drinking and general partying, Loki and I had gone our own ways for a little while.

It didn’t bother me that he would disappear from time to time, he knew more people personally here than I did and it gave me a moment of reprieve, sometimes I would even venture onto the balcony to get some fresh air and clear my head.

The fifth time we split up, I decided to use the short break to use the bathroom and freshen up a little with a little hand wash and a quick dab of water on my face to wipe away the stickiness of mixed body heat.

I must have only been in the bathroom for seven minutes collectively but by the time I left the corridor seemed suddenly seemed devoid of people and I felt strangely lost, it reminded me of a time when I was new in school and picked the wrong classroom door when returning.

Only this time the corridors were longer and there were a few more turns and doors to pick from.

I could hear the music in the background and attempted to follow it while trying to ignore that I had no talent in tracking, there was a reason my job was to sit in an office chair and not show my face on the field.

It was almost thrilling, like I was in my own spy movie, sneaking around to try and find my target without being spotted.

Would I be able to come up with a quickfire lie if I’m caught?

Would I meet a rival with the same end goal who I’d strike up a rivalry with, one that would gradually become something more akin to respect?

“Fine, you invited her and actually managed to get her here, looked like you were having fun too, you win.”

Or would I come across a private conversation Tony was having?

“I admit, you best me with this one, you win.”

With Thor.

“I do, don’t I? You owe me.”

And Loki.

My heart dropped when it all clicked together, which took a couple of seconds as the words and voices registered together and blended into a scene.

I’d paused on the spot as soon as I heard Tony’s voice, initially worried that I would wander into something he wanted to keep separate from everyone else at the party.

Not just me.

They were talking about me.

What had Tony said?

Something about Loki getting me here, but when would he have cared that I was at a party anyway?

We barely knew one another.

“I told you that it’s not hard to charm someone, if Thor can manage it in two days then I inevitably could.”

My blood ran cold and my stomach fluttered uncomfortably, the alcohol mixing with the growing betrayal and creating a mixture of pure nausea.

“But you took longer than a ‘wet weekend’, so do you really win?”

My heart jolted again.

Clint was in on it too?

How many of the others here had been part of this game?

Were they laughing behind my back the entire night?

Sniggering when I’d been dancing with the player, knowing that he’d eventually rip away the confidence we had built between us, or at least I had.

“Don’t think that you can get out of paying your dues, aren’t you a man of your honour?” Loki chuckled, that damn laugh that made me feel sick.

My throat burned as my chest tightened, making breathing a task as I fought back to urge to cry.

I couldn’t remember the last time I had felt like this.

Actually, had I ever felt the burn of such severe humiliation before?

Although I didn’t have the full context of the conversation, this didn’t seem like one of those rom-com moments of a simple misunderstanding.

Even their short talk made the intention loud and clear and I felt foolish, I had allowed myself to be strung along by some God who had a way of forcing himself into your world no matter how much you wished to resist it.

“So what’s the plan now, brother?”

“I’m not entirely sure, I didn’t plan for this to happen so quickly, I thought it would take a couple more weeks but then that mission fell perfectly into my lap.”

“Don’t look at me,” I could picture Tony holding his hands up, “I was just relaying the info so I can’t take credit.”

As they talked, their footsteps got closer to the corner I was stood behind and I had to force myself to move, not wishing to be discovered and having to face this directly, even though I knew that my chances of getting away unseen by that point were slim.

My legs felt disjointed and my stomach continued to flutter in discomfort as I took my first step, feeling as though I had forgotten how to walk in the presence of others.

Somehow, I managed to force myself forward with enough speed to get past the junction of the corridors without colliding with anyone, though not fast enough to get by without being seen.

There was a lull between my running past and the calling of my name by Loki as he followed after me.

Despite my blurred vision, lack of direction and generally shorter stature, he didn’t manage to catch up with me until I had made it outside, into the biting cold of the late-night air.

“Will you wait?” He said, making a grab for my wrist.

His fingers barely gazed my skin before I wrenched it away, finding myself turning towards him with nothing but distain and hatred.

“Don’t touch me!” I yelled, catching the attention of some passers-by on the other side of the street, but I didn’t care by that point.

“Okay, I won’t,” he replied, holding his hands in front of himself while taking a defensive step back, “but can you please hear me out?”

“No, nothing you say right now will make any of this better.”

“Of course not, but I still wish to tell you that I didn’t mea-”

“Don’t you dare hit me with an ‘I didn’t mean to’,” I snarled, feeling my tears of sadness turning into an anger that made the words stick to the back of my throat. “You didn’t mean to what? Huh? Earn my trust to rip it away from me? Take pity on the sad sack with no friends under the pretense of common decency for what? Some brownie points with the boys?”

“It’s not like tha-”

“Oh cut the shit, Loki, you’re smarter than that so save both of our dignities.”

“Would you stop cutting me off?”

“No, I don’t want to hear a word you have to say, you’ve done more than enough damage.”

I’d never felt such seething rage in my life, I knew I was glaring at him with utter disdain purely from how sore my entire being was.

My whole body was shaking and it took everything I had in me to be the bigger person and turn to walk away, leaving him standing on the sidewalk with a pathetic look of self-pity.

Chapter Text

I somehow managed to make it back home despite the fogginess of my mind and the blurriness of my vision.

It was late by the time I found myself trudging towards my apartment door, dragging my feet and wiping my eyes which were sore from the crying and the cold wind hitting them.

I was ready to drop into bed, curl up and forget the world until Monday morning, where I would have to force myself out the door to work for the man who had been part of this set-up.

How old were they all again?

Why would anyone beyond the age of ten think something like this was humorous?

Not that Loki looked like he found it funny, but he was also the God of Mischief and Lies so of course he could act like he didn’t.

“This is all so confusing,” I mumbled with a short sniff as I stepped up to my door.

Shifting my bag around on my hip, I pulled it open and started to rifle through, feeling my panic beginning to rise at the distinct lack of keys inside.

“No, no no no,” I huffed, turning my bag upside down to drop everything onto the floor as if it wasn’t obvious enough that they were definitely either inside the apartment I was now locked out of or laying abandoned on some random sidewalk between my building and the hall.

My lip quivered as more tears built up from nowhere, I was surprised that I still had some extra water hidden somewhere to cry again.

Ignoring the growing ache in my head, I dropped down to my knees and started picking up my items one by one, as if by some magic they would appear beneath one of the four other items inside.

My phone was buzzing as it lay on the floor and apparently had been going off for a while, I simply hadn’t noticed as I had switched the sound off to not be rude to my company.

The irony of that hit me like a lead pipe and caused me to let out another sob.

If I had any left, the last of my resolve was gone.

Dropping my bag carelessly to one side, I shifted around to lean with my back against the door and let myself loose, no longer holding in the reservations I’d had while attempting to cry with muted dignity on my way home.

The powerful sobs I had been trying to hold in were let out, my breathing hitched and the small tears became a waterfall.

I was done and now being stuck outside the comfort of my own home until sometime in the morning had been the straw that broke the camel’s back.

I couldn’t remember the last time I had cried this hard but I had to admit, it felt good, cathartic even to let out my anger at Loki and my sadness over the situation in general.

Despite how pathetic it probably looked, if I pushed past the utter hopelessness I felt about the situation, it almost felt refreshing to be sat on the floor with my legs splayed out in front of me, letting my heart out.

At least it was, until my neighbour from across the way opened the door to find me in my utterly humiliating position, her hair dishevelled in a way that made me assume she had been sleeping and made me feel bad for waking her.

All the conflicting thoughts and emotions were making my head hurt even more.

“Oh my god,” she frowned, “are you okay?”

It was obviously a rhetorical question and didn’t need to be answered, but I still felt the need to whimper out a little; “Yeah.”

Curse my need to not be a hinderance to people, especially people I didn’t know.

Sure, I had seen her coming or going over the years and we shared very, very brief greetings but it had never been anything that would make us more than light acquaintances by sheer circumstance.

By sheer chance, I’d spoken more with her live-in boyfriend, Steven, than I had her.

There was one time where he’d formally introduced himself after he came to give me some of my mail that had accidentally been put in their box.

The second time was when we had a very brief conversation with him as he packed up the car, explaining that she was going in for surgery and that they were both worried about their four year old cat, Sol, while she was in hospital and he was staying with her family.

After that, it was more quick nods or a ‘hi’ here or there.

Come to think of it, I don’t think we even knew one another’s name, or at least I didn’t know hers.

That thought certainly made my heart clench again.

I really had shut myself off into my own little world.

“Sure,” she drawled out, looking at my locked door and then back down to me, “have you lost your key?”

I nodded slowly while wiping my eyes, trying to stem the tear flow now that I had company.

“Well shit,” she mumbled, leaning against her doorframe, “and they don’t open ‘til nine.”

She crossed her arms and drummed her fingers against her bicep, pulling her lips to one side.

“Tell you what, how about you come inside and stay on my couch for the night?”

“Huh?” I asked dumbly, looking up at her and feeling like a doe-eyed Bambi.

“Well I can’t leave you on the floor, can I? Unless you got somewhere to go, but it seems a little late to be calling people.”

Her eyes diverted to my own phone, which had started buzzing away to itself again.

“At least for most people.”

I also gave the screen a glance and then swiped a finger across the screen to the red ‘ignore’ button before shifting around to stand, dusting myself off as I went.

“I really appreciate this,” I said with the best smile that I could muster.

“Think nothing of it,” she smiled, stepping back inside and holding the door open for me.

I nodded slowly and stepped inside, appreciating the darkness in the room compared to the burning lights in the hallway.

“Would you like something to drink?”

“No thank you,” I shook my head, “I’m already being enough trouble.”

“Nonsense,” she said, waving her hand before closing the door and stepping around me to head toward the living room, where she switched on the light.

I trailed after her, taking in the decorations that I could make out in the dim light.

“Okay, I’ll grab you a spare blanket, I hope you’re okay with using one of the couch cushions as a pillow but we don’t have any spare ones.”

“That’s fine, thank you.”

“You can stop saying thank you so much too,” she laughed while disappearing down the hall.

I watched her back and then stepped over to the couch, carefully sitting down as though it would break beneath me.

The seats were bouncier than my own couch and it threw me off guard just how high it was in comparison, though my body relaxed quicker than my brain did and I started to feel drowsy, all the exertion finally becoming too much.

Though I was still hesitant to get too comfortable, I found it too hard to fight and gave in to my urge to kick my shoes off and lie down to get into the best position.

It wasn’t a long couch and I had to bend my knees a little to keep my feet from hanging over the edge, but it was something cozy and warm for the night.

She returned just as my eyes were beginning to droop and become hard to keep open.

“Here you go,” she said, holding the blanket out to me, “I hope it’s okay.”

“It’s fine, tha-” I bit my lip as I caught myself and merely nodded, turning my attention on sitting up and unfolding the blanket to throw it over myself.

“You’re welcome, just let me know if you need anything,” she trailed off as though distracted by a particular thought, then put one hand on her hip. “You know, I don’t think I know your name and we’ve lived across from each other for what? Six years?”

“Something like that,” I replied before hiding a yawn behind my hand. “Sorry.”

“We all do it, anyway as I said, if you need anything then just ask, I’m Jayce by the way.”

“Jayce,” I repeated, “that’s a nice name.”

“Thanks, I picked it myself,” she smiled proudly.

I nodded, giving her a tired smile.

As I squinted through my heavy and aching eyes, I finally told her my name.

It wasn’t exactly how I had pictured introducing myself to my neighbour, not that I ever had honestly, but it was nice to finally exchange names.

Truthfully, it felt like the step in a good direction.

“Oh,” she started, pointing down at my phone, “and I’d say turn that off, if they’re the ones who caused you to be this wound up then they don’t deserve your attention right now.”

Jayce gave me a finalising nod and then a goodnight before retreating to her bedroom.

I waited until she had left completely then got up and moved across the room to turn the light back out, thankful that the layout of their place was near identical to mine, just flipped.

Upon returning to the couch, I led back down and settled in, ready to call it a night.

As a final act of moving forward to the weekend and putting it all behind me, I did exactly as Jayce suggested and lifted my phone towards my face, swiping Loki’s name from my screen again so that I could shut it down and set it to one side.

Sure, it would hurt for a while and it’d be something I’d inevitably have to address, but tomorrow was a new day and Loki was not going to ruin it.

I just had to get home first.

Chapter Text

The morning came around with a radio playing and the smell of food wafting through the air, it was domestically serene and one of the most pleasant ways I had woken up in a long while.

Kicking the covers off, I slowly sat up and rubbed the sleep from my eyes, wincing when a particularly sharp piece of sleep dust got caught in the corner of one of them.

My clothes felt twisted and uncomfortable, my hair felt out of place and my legs felt stiff, but I felt well rested and hunger was beginning to rise now that I had smelt food.

Swivelling myself into a better sitting position, I stretched out my legs and let out a small groan of satisfaction.

As though summoned, Steven appeared at the side of the couch and smiled down at me, looking too chipper for a Saturday morning.

“Hey,” he greeted, “so we got hold of a spare key for you, it’s waiting down in the office, hope you don’t mind.”

“Oh,” I said, my voice coming out a few octaves higher, “that’s really kind of you, thanks.”

“Not a problem,” he nodded, “though don’t feel like we’re kicking you out, we’d love to have our longstanding neighbour over for breakfast.”

“I really don’t want to impose.”

“You won’t be, trust me,” Steven glanced towards the kitchen before leaning closer to stage whisper, “Jay always makes enough to feed a damn army.”

From in the kitchen there was a call of; “Hey!” over the music.

“I love you!” He called back.

Something about the way they were interacting reminded me of my parents, who I hadn’t seen in too long.

They had always been an inspirational couple to me and helped me grow the aspiration of what I wanted my own relationship to be like, loving and supportive, walking down the street while holding hands even after hitting the thirty-year mark.

I wanted what they had some day and my stomach churned at the fact that I was getting older and some day never seemed to be around the corner for me.

Not to say that I needed a relationship to be happy and whole, it was more than I still found myself imagining what my future ‘other half’ would be like during moments of down time and the older I got, the more I realised that I couldn’t put a solid face to my lover.

Now I could add on the fact that for a fleeting moment I was beginning to hope that maybe Loki would be a push in the right direction, that he would take up that spot where nothing but a shadow previously was in my mind.

But of course someone like him would never stoop to the levels of someone like me.

I was so beneath him that I was nothing but mere cannon fodder.

“Hey, no sadness here.”

I jumped as a plate was put down in front of me before the couch dipped on the other side.

Lifting my head, I looked towards Jayce, who had tucked her long legs beneath her as she settled down, resting her own full plate on the arm of the chair.

“I’m good,” I said with a smile that didn’t feel remotely convincing.

“Uh-uh, I’ve seen that look too many times and we’re not going to let you linger on those bad thoughts, eat up and let’s talk.”

Steve had left at some point during my internal musings and returned with his own plate, sitting down on the floor on the opposite side of the table.

“Well,” he started, looking between the two of us, “I think it’s time we got to know one another better.”

And that was how we spent a good three hours of our morning.

It was calming and it felt good to finally get acquainted with my neighbours.

I learned various bits of their pasts, including how they met when Jayce was a bartender and Steven was a dancer in the same club and what their family life was like.

Although I was hesitant to begin with, I did divulge information about my own home life and my current job situation but I continued to skirt around conversation about how I ended up outside on the floor crying when Jayce tried to steer it in that direction with subtle hints.

By the time I left to go and retrieve my spare key I felt refreshed and a little more jovial than I would have had I had to start the day alone.

As I made my way down to the office, I dared to turn my phone back on to check for any messages that weren’t from Loki.

My phone continued to go off until I reached the office door, the ringtone bouncing off the stairwell walls until I turned the phone to silent to save my sanity.

Unsurprisingly, most messages or voicemails were from the God himself and they continued until around two in the morning before he gave up, I was tempted to listen to the ones he had left but I also didn’t know if I could handle listening to his excuses just yet.

I swiped away any of his messages while waiting for my key, by the time I was on my way back to my room, I only had two non-Loki notifications.

One was from Tony, who had sent me a long email that sounded closer to a Pepper write-up than a genuine apology from the man himself, the other was a message from my best friend, asking for a follow-up on my night with Loki.

I didn’t have the heart to talk to her about it yet, so I shot her a message to say that I would talk to her sometime later after taking some alone time and entered my apartment, closing the door behind me to lock myself back into my own isolation.

Chapter Text

By Monday morning, I was barely ready to face the world.

The weekend had passed by in a slow blur, where I spent most of my time wrapped up in a blanket and binge watching anything that numbed my mind, only interspersed with the occasional trip to the bathroom, kitchen or door if I ordered food more substantial than a snack.

It took a lot of will power, but on Sunday night I managed to pry myself away from the TV screen to clean up the rubbish surrounding me and have a shower, ready for work in the morning.

I would have been lying had I said that my nerves weren’t getting the best of me on the walk in, the thought of seeing the people who caused this being a bit too much to think about, even the music I usually listened to didn’t wash away the butterflies in my stomach.

I’d already mentally prepared myself for a rush to my office, imagining the best route to take and time to arrive to ensure the smallest chance of meeting any of the undesired faces.

The tense trip up to my floor went successfully, but I didn’t breathe until I had reached my office and was about to swipe my key card, once that door clicked open and allowed me access to my solitude then I was scot-free.

It would just be a long day of keeping the blinds down and ignoring any knocks on the door.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t ignore direct call from Pepper, who broke my wonderful ignoring streak of four hours.

Being summoned to Tony’s office wasn’t how I wanted to spend my final hour before lunch, but it seemed inevitable considering the circumstances and I was definitely not going to say no to Pepper.

Everyone knew that she was a force to be reckoned with.

The rush from my office to Tony’s almost caused me a twisted ankle, but I managed to make it without being disturbed.

In fact, the area seemed eerily quiet, as if everyone had been told to keep the area clear and I’d missed the warning, which also made me feel both anxious and stupid for rushing around like Sonic.

I knocked on the door then looked over my shoulder, almost hoping to find another living soul to settle the rising thoughts of a zombie apocalypse, just a small reassurance that I wasn’t walking into a feeder’s trap.

It wasn’t the most foolish of thoughts, you could never predict what would happen around the Avengers.

“It’s open.”

I flinched at the voice invading my thoughts, despite how cheery it sounded.

Taking a deep breath, I slowly opened the door and peered inside, ignoring the man sat at the desk and looking directly to the woman standing beside it.

“You called for me?”

“Indeed I did,” Pepper nodded, holding her hand towards an empty chair in front of the desk. “Please, take a seat.”

Awkwardly, I eased myself into the room and walked to the chair, trying to come across more composed than I felt.

“Thank you for coming,” she said as I perched on the chair, legs pressed tightly together and hands in my lap.

“It’s okay, how can I help?”

“You can’t,” she stated bluntly, “this is more about how we can help you.”

I raised my eyebrow a little, looking to her and then daring to meet Tony’s eye as she nudged his shoulder with her elbow.

“Right, yeah,” he sighed heavily, sitting up straighter in his seat. “I owe you an apology for what happened, you weren’t meant to hear th-”

“I think what he’s trying to say,” Pepper started giving Tony a sharp side eye, “is that it was wrong of them to make bets that involved anyone but themselves.”

“In our defence, we were a little drunk.”

“Which is why he would like to offer you an extended vacation, perhaps time to visit your family and clear your head of everything, return to work when things are less emotional.”

The air was beginning to get thick as Tony rolled his eyes, leaning back in his seat again while keeping the straightest face he could, although it was more than clear that he wasn’t enjoying being made to feel the size of Antman at his smallest.

“If it’s any consolation,” Pepper continued, “I have had a long and thorough talk with each of them regarding the issue and how inappropriate they have been and I’d like to assure you that it will never happen again.”

I could only nod dumbly, all words momentarily leaving my vocabulary.

“Um, thank you,” I mumbled, having to clear my throat.

“You’re welcome to take the rest of the day off,” Tony said, sharing a look with Pepper, “with full pay, of course.”

“Thank you, again,” I nodded, “but I’d rather not have the time off, I’d just stay home and get caught up in my own head, so I’d rather stay at work.”

“Are you sure?” Pepper asked with a small frown.

“Yes, thanks, my work is a great distraction so that’s more than enough.”

“Okay,” she nodded slowly, “if you’re sure, but the offer will still stand if you feel things become too much, right Tony?”

“Absolutely,” he nodded as well, still looking less than thrilled.

“I appreciate it,” I worried my lip between my teeth, my leg beginning to bounce with pent up nerves.

“Then at least take an early lunch when you’re done here, get some fresh air and come back revigorated.”

“I shall, thank you.”

I gave them both the best smile I could, which still felt ridiculously shaky, and stood up from my seat to make my way to the door.

“If there’s anything you need, just let us know,” she said after me.

This caused me to pause in the doorway, my hand still holding onto it as a couple of thoughts sprang to mind.

After taking a lingering moment to consider what I wanted to say, I turned back towards them and cleared my throat again.

“Actually, I do have one small thing to ask.”

“Shoot,” Tony replied, putting his feet up on his desk.

“Can you keep Loki away from my office?”

Pepper’s face softened and she nodded.

“We’ll make sure he keeps his distance.”

“Thank you.”

I gave them both a small smile and then retreated fully, letting the door click shut behind me.

I made my way back to my office to grab my purse, feeling triumphant in keeping my cool, at least for the most part, though also annoyed that I couldn’t speak my mind to my boss without the risk of losing my job.

Though my main take away, apart from Loki being kept from my company, was the cringe inducing thoughts that were sure to keep me up at night.

“I said thank you far too much.”

Chapter Text

The week passed quickly after the meeting and I enjoyed my extended lunch, using the time to take a stroll through the nearby park while munching away on the food I’d bought from a small, family-run deli near the tower.

It was relaxing, though it kicked in a realisation that I hadn’t done this in a long time, so long that I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d done it.

The simple act of taking time for myself, not stressing about work for the next hour and a half or having to rush about to get errands done before the shops shut after work hours, it was pleasant.

How long had it been since I had properly pampered myself?

Taken some me time that didn’t involve me lying around like a slug and feeling gross about myself?

Too long and that needed to change.

Surprisingly, it was Thor who managed to push me towards the decision to take an early exit at the end of the week and use the weekend for selfcare.

Things had been uneventful Monday afternoon through to Wednesday, just more days spent reading, correct, calling around and lonely evenings but opening my door for lunch on Wednesday afternoon nearly wound up in me breaking my neck.

I should have looked around before stepping out, but I hadn’t expected a package to be dumped in front of my office door.

Somehow, I managed to not kick the basket all over the place when my foot collided with the red wicker block that had me stumbling to try and regain my balance.

Once I had gathered myself, I took another glance around before plucking up the basket, giving it a once over as I retreated back into my office, kicking the door closed behind me.

“Lunch can wait,” I mumbled, setting it on my desk.

Naturally, I had anticipated it to be from Loki, even though he probably wouldn’t have gone for such a garish red but the cream coloured cardboard with gold trim and bold black writing proved otherwise.

‘This isn’t much of an apology, but it was the best thing I could do to extend the branch as the Midgardian saying goes.
I hope you accept this gift as a token of my remorse and that we may speak again, though I shall understand if you choose not to.
Fyrirgef mik,
Thor Odinson.’

I raised my eyebrow and noted that I’d have to Google whatever the hell that last bit said while putting the card to one side, looking at the goods that were practically overflowing the top of the basket.

There were snacks, some healthy and some not, some I liked and some I would probably share with the bin, as well as luxurious looking soaps and other little ornaments that were surprisingly thoughtful and personable and that was only the bits I could see on the top.

I had no doubt that Pepper had pushed him towards some kind of redemption, but the image of Thor going out and putting real effort into his ideas for the hamper was heart-warming.

I tucked the hamper under my desk and continued out to lunch, looking forward to my newly luxurious weekend treatment.

After that, my Thursday afternoon was disrupted by a frantic Peter, who begged me to check the report he had sent in.

Not that he needed to beg, bless him.

As is turned out, he had caught himself almost sending off his report over an email and had likewise sent me the homework file by mistake.

Luckily, he caught it in time but we both agreed that he should perhaps not do homework and work reports simultaneously.

“Yeah, no kidding,” he laughed softly, looking around my office as he shuffled on his face. “So, hey, uh…I heard about what happened with Loki, I’m real sorry.”

I sharply lifted my head to look at him, holding back a wince at the sudden action.

Needless to say, I hadn’t expected Peter of all people to bring that up.

“It’s okay, really,” I replied with a faint, unconvincing smile, “I’m getting past it.”

“Good,” he nodded, “it’s weird, I think he does actually like you but you know what he’s like, really complicated to understand and predict, he’s like some kind of riddle tha-”

“You’re rambling,” I laughed, turning my chair towards him, “but it’s sweet that you care.”

Peter’s worry truly did mean a lot but it also didn’t surprise me, he had been lovely from day one.

He stuck around for a good hour or so, catching up and updating me on school life before having to race out for a meeting with Tony while I got back to work.

My last few days continued without incident and no sign of Loki.

Admittedly, I missed his presence, even though he had only been there for a couple of weeks in my working life.

He had this way of making it seem like he’d been in your life forever, whether that was a detriment or not, and the room felt empty without him lounging in my chair making snide remarks about the writing of the book he was reading.

Shutting off my office light and locking the door without him standing watching me made it feel like something was missing and that was quite annoying.

I didn’t need his presence for comfort.

I rolled my eyes and scoffed, shoving my keys into my bag to leave for the weekend.

A weekend where I would not think about Loki.

Unfortunately, I hadn’t even made it out of the building before my plan of starting my relaxing weekend with buying takeaway on the way home was dashed.

I almost made it, as in putting my hands in the door to exit kind of almost, when a very distinct voice yelled my name from the elevators, so loud that it lead to an echo of repeats in the near empty foyer.

With a long sigh, I took a moment to consider whether I should answer or pretend that I didn’t hear the impossible to miss call.

In the end, I gave in and turned around just as Thor walked up to me, his expression uncertain but also friendly.

“Hello,” he said, coming across more hesitant than his usual exuberant self, “I hope you got my gift.”

“I did,” I smiled softly, giving a small nod, “it was lovely, so was the note, even if I still don’t know what frigger milk is.”

He laughed heartily, his usual smile returning.

“Fyrirgef mik, it means I’m sorry, next time I shall write it out formally for you.”

“No, no that’s okay, it added some authenticity to it.”

“It is said with pure sincerity in my tongue,” he nodded, “and my people do not say sorry easily.”

“Then I think it’s only fair that I accept your apology.”

“Enough to perhaps join me for dinner? Just so that I can continue to make amends.”

My eyebrows shot up in surprise and I felt myself stall for a moment.

“Oh, I wasn’t expecting that.”

“I suppose I did spring it from nowhere and I would understand if you decline.”

I nodded slowly, chewing on my lower lip as I looked away.

This was certainly out of the blue and although he had been part of it, Thor wasn’t the one I was really mad at.

Irritated, sure, but I didn’t feel as begrudgingly towards him as I did with Loki.

In fact, I felt kind of passive towards his brother entirely, never having really interacted with him for this long before.

“Okay,” I nodded with a smile, “let’s grab something to eat.”

“Wonderful!” He smiled widely, pushing the door open and holding it until I passed through, “I know a wonderful place, I hope you like your Midgardian Greek food.”

Chapter Text

“I think I may still have the wedding dress, though it’s not as new as it was many lives ago, I don’t know how my past life fit into it.”

My laugh came out louder than I intended as I threw my head back and covered my mouth with my hand, trying not to choke on my food as Thor continued on with a classic adventure from Asgard.

After he had explained to me that this was an apology and ‘let’s talk and get to know one another meal’, he’d started to spout stories from his childhood and other adventures and my chest hurt from laughing so much, breathing was a thing of the past and my lips were stuck in a joker’s smile.

My fork hovered over my plate, the food waiting to be eaten getting cold as I tried to control my laughter enough to take another bite as Thor’s story came to an end and gave me a chance to collect myself.

I didn’t regret agreeing to come as much as I thought I would, although it did take us the walk to the restaurant to ease the tension that was building a silent wall between us.

Thankfully, by the time we sat down that wall had melted and we fell into easy conversation, Thor proving himself to be a better conversationalist than others would had led me to believe by some of the comments in their reports.

He was more knowledgeable and wittier than people gave him credit for and I was thankful that I took the chance and accepted the olive branch that he was brave enough to extend.

The food was amazing and the company was fantastic, it was proving to be a wonderful evening.

Of course, we both knew that that would have to turn at some point so that we could address the elephant in the room.

We continued chattering casually about nothing until dessert.

The waiter had taken our orders and plucked up our menus, telling us that he would be back in a few minutes before sauntering off.

I watched his back for a couple of steps then turned my attention back to Thor to see him looking at me with soft seriousness.

I stared at him in return then let out a long sigh.

“It’s time, isn’t it?”

“I’m afraid so,” he nodded.

“Do we have to?”

He pulled his lips to one side and moved his head from one side to another while shrugging lightly.

“No, but I’d like you to at least hear out what I have to say.”

“Okay, I can manage that.”

I leaned back in my seat, resting my hands atop the table and linking my fingers, akin to that of someone sitting in an interview.

Thor gave me a grateful smile then cleared his throat.

“I understand why you are upset about what happened and I cannot make excuses for any of it, especially not on my brother’s behalf,” he started, looking from the table to meet my eyes, “I deeply regret what happened and I can’t use Midgardian ale as an excuse but we truly weren’t thinking clearly.”

I nodded slowly, lifting my glass to take a sip.

“Mistakes were made that night and though Loki is many things, including a liar, a master manipulator and malicious when he wishes to be, he is not typically one to use someone’s insecurity against them so casually, especially given his own issues.”

“So why was I an exception?” I asked, my finger running over the rim of my glass.

“I cannot say for certain, he didn’t truly have anything to gain from a drunken bet and yet he accepted, though I don’t believe he anticipated the impact it would have on him.”

I quirked my eyebrow and lifted my chin a little, conveying my interest wordlessly.

“You see, during your time together, my brother grew attached to you, he wouldn’t admit it but I could tell, just as I can tell that he is beating himself up over not calling it off and admitting the truth before things got out of hand.”

“He’s beating himself up?” I repeated, earning a wry smile from Thor. “Then why did he continue going along with it? We were friends for weeks.”

“I do not have an answer to that, but I know that he has not been the same since that night and it is growing concerning, it has been a long time since I have seen Loki like this, he does not typically get attached so easily.”

“Right,” I sighed, running my hand through my hair, “so in a loose way, you’re asking me to forgive him.”

“No, but I am asking you to at least think about talking it through with him and making your mind up from there, he’s too stubborn to approach you himself.”

“That sounds like Loki, can’t let the mask slip.”

Thor laughed, “Very true.”

I mulled over what Thor had said during dessert and on the way home, the fresh air not doing anything to help clear my mind of the racing thoughts.

Truthfully, it was good advice but I was nervous about reaching out to Loki.

The last thing I wanted to do was extend myself out to be shut down again, my heart couldn’t take another pounding of unrequited emotion.

I trusted Thor’s word, but I was also cautious that he was just looking out for his brother and was saying what I needed to hear in order to help Loki get over whatever issue was apparently plaguing him.

Initially, I had had suspicions of him being Loki himself but those had been squashed when he proved he wasn’t by simply wielding his beloved hammer.

Could it have been an illusion? Sure, but I fully believed that it was Thor I had spent my evening with and it was nice to get to know him a little more.

My Friday night was spent led on the couch, staring at the ceiling as I thought about what to do with myself until I fell asleep.

Saturday morning was spent cleaning up with music that was loud enough to not disturb the neighbours while being enough to drown out my conflicting thoughts, by the afternoon I was ready to veg out and ignore the world but Jayce decided to pay me a visit.

“Just to make sure you’re okay,” she smiled, brushing her fingers through her hair.

“I’m fine, thank you,” I replied, returning her smile.

“Has he still been bugging you?”

“No, but I did go out to dinner with his brother yesterday.”

Her eyebrow quirked and she gave me a look of minor judgement, her lips pulling to one side.

“Not like ‘rebound revenge dinner’,” I said quickly, shaking my head, “he invited me to say sorry for his part and to bother to get to know me.”

“Right,” she said slowly, drumming her long nails on my kitchen countertop, “and there weren’t any alternative plans there?”

“Unless you count pleading his brother’s case as ‘alternative’ then no, it was nice and casual for the most part.”

“Okay, I’m just making sure.”

Her sudden watching over me made my stomach flutter, it was nice to have another friend close by and it seemed that both her and Steven were going to stick around and keep an eye out for me.

I’d be sure to do the same for them, all’s fair.

Jayce did invite me out with them for the evening, but I declined and said that I would rather stay at home and think things over, besides I wouldn’t be a lot of fun, I had never been a fan of crowds and super loud noises even at the best of times and I didn’t want to ruin their fun.

Instead, I spent my night binge-watching a show I’d seen a thousand times and staring at my phone, waiting for a text to say my ordered food was on its way and contemplating whether I should take Thor’s advice and contact Loki to hear him out.

It was the following groggy Sunday morning while eating reheated rice and sweet and sour sauce that I finally took the plunge.

With a loaded sigh, I unlocked my phone and found the name I had been avoiding for so long.

I stared at it for longer than necessary, chewing my food as slowly as possible to prolong the inevitable.

After plucking up the courage to call rather than text I gave myself an affirming nod, had a large swig of peach iced tea and pressed the green button.

Time slowed around me as the ringing started.

‘This is a mistake.’

Another ring.

‘I could hang up.’

A third ring.

‘But he’d see that I dialed, but I could pretend it was a mistake.’

A fourth ring.

‘This is the perfect time to-’

A click, a little bit of shuffling on the other end and then a drowsy; “Hello?”

I winced and closed my eyes, my grip on the phone tightening.

‘Shit.’

Chapter Text

“Loki,” I shakily sighed out.

“Yes?”

There was a long pause until he finally replied, at least it felt like a lifetime to me.

My guts were churning and I could feel my adrenaline spiking, my fingertips beginning to go cold as my chest vibrated with pent up feelings I couldn’t distinguish.

“Um, h-hey,” I said, shifting in my seat and clearing my throat, “how are you?”

“Tired,” he replied with a long, sleepy sigh that sounded kind of adorable, “it was a long night.”

“Oh…I’ll call you back later then.”

It was stupid and I was fully aware that it was stupid, but my mind definitely jumped to ‘that’ reason why his night was a long one.

Thoughts of him being with another flooded me which alternately made me start to think that Thor had been skirting around some details, which seemed unlikely but my rational side had gone silent.

I wasn’t typically this emotionally driven, sure I could jump to conclusions and take things at face value without actually thinking of deeper connotations until later on but this was something completely different.

I had no evidence to back up these jealous thoughts that sprung up, a long night could mean anything and my dumb brain was trying to find any reason to push me into further angst.

I was too emotionally exhausted for this.

“Don’t,” he said, “it’s good to hear from you, promising even.”

“You think so?”

“Yes, unless I’m wrong in hoping that this means we can start rebuilding our relationship.”

My stomach fluttered a little, the mere prospect making my heart both clench and jolt with anticipation.

“Is that what you want?”

“I know you talked to Thor about it and knowing Thor, he probably overindulged in my personal business so you already know the answer.”

I worried my bottom lip between my teeth, looking towards the window as a bird flew past, not having to worry about this emotional crap.

“Maybe I just want to hear it from you personally.”

“Would you not rather have this conversation face to face?”

My throat constricted and I found myself spluttering on my own saliva, breathing momentarily becoming a hinderance and only making me cough more.

“Are you okay?” He asked, voice laced with concern which was at least a little comforting.

“Y-Yeah,” I managed to splutter out between a thousand throat clearings, “I’m g-good.”

“Perhaps I shouldn’t have suggested that, your body certainly seems to have taken a visceral reaction to it.”

I laughed through my coughing, waiting for the horrible tickle in the back of my throat to settle down before I could continue.

“I’m not sure if I should listen to that or my brain telling me that might be a good idea.”

There was another pause.

“Definitely listen to your body,” he eventually said, huffing an amused laugh and damn it, I smiled.

For the first time in a long while when it came to something about Loki, I smiled a genuine smile.

I missed him.

The God with his outlandish tales and quick wit, the company he provided as I worked was nothing but a void now that he wasn’t taking up the space and I could no longer push it aside in the hope that I wouldn’t feel it any longer.

In the short weeks he had been setting me up we had grown close and even despite the circumstances, I missed him.

“Don’t think you’re forgiven just because I’m laughing,” I said with a teasing lilt.

“I wouldn’t dream of it, not until I know we’re past this.”

“You think we will be?”

“Who knows? We’ll only find out when we finally discuss it and take things from there.”

Letting out a long sigh and giving a nod that he couldn’t see, I relented.

“When are you free?”

That afternoon I found myself sitting by the window of a coffee shop, staring out at the people racing by, protecting themselves from the downpour that was getting heavier by the second.

Many thoughts and outcomes were racing through my head, mixing with the nerves that were building at the mere thought of facing Loki in person again but I had settled on one thing, I was going to handle this maturely.

No tantrums, jumping to more conclusions than I already had or guilt driving, no matter how much he may deserve it in my vengeful mind.

We were going to talk this out like the adults we were in a calm environment.

The shop was practically empty, giving it the serene calmness of a Youtube ambience video.

It was nice and I found myself getting lost in my own world until the chair opposite me was pulled out and Loki took his seat.

He looked as radiant as ever, if not a smallest hint of tired and mildly dishevelled, darkened eyes making his pale skin stand out more.

Strangely, it suited him.

“Good afternoon,” he said with a hesitant smile.

“It’s good to see you, Loki,” I nodded in return.

“And you.”

We regarded each other in silence for a too long moment, Loki looking solemn as my fingers tapped against the top of the table, my leg bouncing beneath it.

The rain continued to patter against the window and clinks of plates and cups came from the counter, the mild chattering of the few other patrons sounding like a buzz in the background of our movie moment.

I’m wracking my brains trying to think of a way to start this conversation, the entire reason we were there in the first place at two-thirty on a Sunday afternoon but I’m coming up blank.

“I’m sorry.”

My eyes dart up from where they’d fallen to stare at a stain on the table to meet Loki’s again, my eyebrows twitching at the sudden intrusion of my panic.

He somehow looked more tired than he had on arrival, his face sunken and mouth downturned, I’d never seen such an expression on him before.

Leaning forward and linking his fingers together as if he were in a meeting, he looked down at the table and let out another loaded sigh, the soundtrack to my life as of late.

“I’ll get us a drink.”

Loki pushed his chair back and hastily walked out of sight to the counter, leaving me in my little corner again.

It was obvious that he was uncomfortable, perhaps not being used to having to apologise or simply refusing to in the past, I wouldn’t put it past him.

The few minutes he’s gone gave me time to dwell on where I hope for this conversation to go but I still can’t think of a way to start what needs to be said, I was hoping that the silver-tongued God would have that covered.

He returned with a loaded tray that he carefully set down on the table, the waft of my favourite warm drink instantly invaded my senses and a plate of chocolate chip shortbread made my mouth water.

I hadn’t realised how little I had eaten that day and suddenly I was hit with a rumbling stomach that needed to be sated.

“I hope you don’t mind me picking up a little extra,” he smiled as he sat down.

“I don’t, though I will now suspect that you’re trying to butter me up.”

“Me? Having ulterior motives? Never.”

I rolled my eyes with a smile, plucking up one of the three sweet treats.

“So, I guess I should continue from ‘I’m sorry’,” Loki said, his eyes watching my fingers.

“I think it might be best,” I nodded, tearing a small part off to pop into my mouth.

“I thought as much,” he sighed, running a hand over his hair before carefully lifting his hot mug. “I can’t even begin to express how sorry I am for what happened, it was foolish and childish to accept such a bet and I regret going along with it.”

“And why did you?”

“Truthfully? I don’t know,” he shrugged, pouring some sugar into his drink and beginning to stir it in, “I won’t sit here and pretend that I do or make excuses, it was a stupid, spur of the moment decision over drinks and I regret going along with it.”

“Was it ever a genuine thing for you?”

“To begin with, no, I had no intention of developing a real friendship and wanted to keep it purely to the bet but…things changed.”

Though it wasn’t unexpected, my stomach twisted a little at his admission, knowing the truth through deduction was different to having it confirmed.

My throat suddenly felt dry and the second piece of the sweet, sweet shortbread seemed stodgier than the first bite.

“Of course, I did gather as much.”

“You’re smart, naturally you did.”

I smiled, lifting my own drink from the tray to set in front of me.

“Now you’re really trying to butter me up.”

“Merely being honest.”

“And I appreciate that but that doesn’t mean I forgive you, not yet.”

“I understand, it is only fair that I make this up to you and I don’t expect to jump straight back into where we were, I need to build up the trust and I hope you’ll forgive me over time.”

“Honestly? I hope I do too, but I can’t promise anything right now, what you did really hurt me and I’m not sure when or even if I’ll see you in the same light again.”

Loki gave another nod.

“I can’t expect it,” he said, lifting the mug to take a sip.

“No, but we can only try and this is a good first step, thank you for being honest with me.”

“I have to gain your trust somehow, right?”

“So you can take over my office again?”

“Of course, what other reason could there be?”

He smirked as I rolled my eyes again and looked out the windows, sipping my own drink while resisting the urge to kick him under the table.

“Well,” I said by means of distraction to stop myself from giving in to my violent urge, “tell me how you’ve been suffering without me, that’s a good way to start grovelling.”

Loki quirked an eyebrow then chuckled, resting his head on his hand as he propped his elbow up on the table.

“Shooting for all the juicy details, are we?”

“What else would I want to hear? I suffered, I know you suffered at least a little, so indulge me in more than repeat apologies.”

“I see that you’ve been hiding a sadistic side to yourself.”

I smiled and shrugged, taking another long sip.

He let out a small hum and looked back out of the window as the rain continued to pound against the glass.

“I guess I’ll start with my sleepless nights.”

Chapter Text

Monday morning rolled around and I found my stomach fluttering with excitement and nerves.

This was the new beginning, as we had agreed on before going our separate ways the afternoon before.

“What do you say?” He asked, brushing off the crumbs from his fingertips. “Tomorrow we start over again, press the magical restart button and see where we can go with genuine intentions.”

We shook hands on it, left the shop and went our separate ways.

The elevator ride up to my floor seemed to take excruciatingly long and my spine started to tingle the closer I got, much like it would if I were close to finish a long report or finishing an exam back when I was in school.

It was an uncomfortable feeling, one that I couldn’t ignore and had to try to stretch out even though I knew that it would be worthless.

When the doors finally dinged open, I stepped out and turned to my office, twisting the strap of my bag in my hands as I headed through the small office area.

Before they came into sight, I heard the voices of Pepper and Loki.

“-ou to stay away from her office?” Pepper said, sounding impatient and already done with the conversation.

“Relax,” Loki sighed, “this time I actually stand here invited.”

“Forgive me if I don’t believe you.”

“You won’t have to simply take my word on it for long, though I’m hurt you wouldn’t trust me in the first place.”

“You have given me no reason to, actually you give us all reason to do the exact opposite.”

“I am deeply wounded, Potts, you are merely judging me from what your precious Stark tells you and I have to say that he is extremely biased.”

I approached in time to see Pepper’s look of frustration, her eyes rolling as she turned towards me, pointing towards Loki.

“Is he telling the truth? Did you arrange to meet him here this morning?”

I looked between the two and gave her a soft, wavering smile.

“I did, yes.”

She let her hand dropped to her side and let out a loaded sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose as Loki smirked behind her.

“Our coffee yesterday was wonderful,” he said with a teasing chuckle.

Pepper looked at him sternly then stepped towards me, leaning in close.

“I hope you know what you’re doing,” she whispered before walking off.

I watched her leave then let out a long breath, turning back to Loki who was merrily chuckling to himself.

“I feel like I’ve broken her trust,” I sighed, stepping up to my door.

“She’ll be fine,” he waved off uncaringly, “our business is not hers.”

“It kind of is when I work for her partner’s company.”

He scoffed but said nothing further as I unlocked my door and stepped inside, the early morning sunlight beaming in through the windows and warmed up the office nicely after too many chilly days of winter.

I walked over to my desk and Loki closed the door behind us before making his way to his usual spot as I set myself up on my desk, switching on the computer to let it load as I settled in.

“I missed this place,” Loki sighed wistfully as he lowered into his old spot, looking around my office like it was the most nostalgic thing he had seen.

“It’s really not that special,” I replied, logging onto my profile, “and it’s only been a couple of weeks.”

“Ah, that is where you’re wrong,” he leaned back, fingers drumming into the arm of the chair as if we were a King on a throne, “I rather enjoy this spot and a week or two was long enough for me to miss it.”

“I see, you missed the seat more than me, I know when I’m not wanted.”

“It’s a wonderful seat with a wonderful view.”

I raised my eyebrow and looked towards him then the window.

“Are you being cliché or do you literally mean the view of a vast city is wonderful?”

He smirked as I turned back to him and shrugged.

“I’ll let you decide that one.”

I stared at him, narrowing my eyes before turning my attention to the latest batch of reports.

We feel back into our old, temporary routine.

I diligently proofread and edited away and he sat in the chair, filling the otherwise silent room with occasional sounds of shuffling, leather on leather, soft sighs and the turning of pages.

It brought my thoughts back to the app I’d use to fill surrounding sounds at night to help me sleep.

‘Sleep next to fictional character’ was a favourite, though I’d have to mute out the weird kissing option many of them had, mouth sounds are hideous and did people really kiss so much in their sleep?

Guess my forever single ass hadn’t experienced that yet, but I still highly doubted it.

Though maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if it was Loki making disgusting squelching kissing noises towards me and with every glance I shot his way, I found myself falling back into the same trap I had before.

It appeared that despite what happened between us, was still stuck admiring his ethereal beauty.

Unlike the dragging days of the past few weeks, time flew by and before I knew it lunch was upon us.

“Well,” Loki said, setting the book to one side before standing up, “I don’t know about you but I am ravenous.”

I looked up from my screen, watching him stretch out the kinks in his joints and then returning back to the report, saving my progress.

“I’m sure you are,” he said in a strangely low voice.

Looking towards him was a bad decision, the expression he was giving me made a shiver run down my spine in a way I’d never truly experienced with someone else before.

Was this what it was like for people in shlocky erotic novels?

Clearing my throat, I gave him a polite smile and grabbed my bag, setting it on the chair to rifle through for my purse as a means of distraction.

“Let’s get something to eat from the cafeteria.”

“Yes, let’s.”

The tension that built up in that one moment didn’t alleviate for the entire duration of our lunch period, even if nothing further happened and we spent our hour talking and eating.

It was intense and more than a little distracting, though he gave no indication that he felt anything and that cemented that I was purely stuck in this awkward amass of emotions that hadn’t left from the first round of our friendship despite what had happened.

All that time I had spent trying to convince myself that I hadn’t felt romantically towards him, that I had merely fallen into his charm and could still hate him proved to be nothing but self-gaslighting.

It seemed my feelings were there to stay, even after he had showed me a side I never wished to see again.

What a rude wakeup call from my brain.

Emotions, they’re so needlessly complicated.

For the rest of the day, I tried to push lingering Loki thoughts aside and focus on my job.

Surprisingly, him being sat in the same room aided in keeping my mind on my task rather than off lingering, wondering where he was and what he was up to.

Not even in a possessive way, just from sheer curiosity that would provide a ridiculous distraction.

Occasionally, when my eyes would stray towards him from my report, he would give me a soft smile as he turned his page then looked away, making sure to keep the eye contact short.

It was pleasant and eased us into a steady friendship as similar days went on.

These days became weeks and we only proved to get closer, much to everyone’s surprise, except Thor’s.

My crush continued to worsen, but I made no move to ruin what we had, not so soon after we had established a friendship, and more importantly built up trust, again.

It was amazing just how quickly time passed, it felt like I had blinked and somehow found myself six months into the future, as if Loki’s screw up had never happened and we had always been best friends, watching and mocking movies together.

Loki had become accustomed to forgoing his prim and proper façade and let loose, donning a pair of green silk pyjamas and allowing his usually well groomed hair to fall around his face in a matt of ‘I just woke up’ black.

He looked so alive when we were alone, allowing himself to laugh harder than I’d ever seen him laugh in public, practically wheezing with tears in his eyes over his own terrible joke.

I had to calm down myself, wiping at my eyes while taking some deep breaths to try and stabilize the aching in my chest that was bound to lead to a coughing fit in a couple of minutes.

“I need to get some water,” I croaked, standing up from my spot.

“And perhaps some more popcorn.”

“As the King demands,” I smiled, picking up the bowl for the third time that night.

“Keep sassing at me and you’ll pay for your insolence,” he smirked at me, my standing height compared to his sitting one making the look all the more delectable as I looked down at him.

“Hm,” I said, turning away, “is that a threat or a promise?”

“Play your cards right and you’ll find out soon enough.”

I rolled my eyes, trying not to smile as I made my way to the kitchen, grabbing another packet of microwave popcorn as I passed the right cupboard.

As I listened to the corn popping away, I leaned against the counter that gave me the perfect vantage point into the other room and watched Loki, who sat in his spot, legs on the couch and scrolling on his phone as he waited for me to return.

A feeling of absolute serenity came over me and I found myself smiling.

I’m glad that we had gotten this far after that huge hiccup, it was a true testament to character that we could get past it and made a stronger bond than I thought possible.

Jayce had been understandably questionable when I told her about everything and made sure that she checked up regularly but so far, things had turned out pretty damn well.

The microwave dinged and pulled me out of my reverie.

I hadn’t noticed that Loki had looked up from his phone and caught me staring, obviously zoning out but staring at him none the less.

He gave me an amused smirk then looked back at his phone while I quickly turned away, focusing back on my task of shaking the popcorn to try and push away my embarrassment.

Our friendship was going well, but this damn crush was going to be the end of me.

Chapter Text

“I’m nervous.”

I looked up to Loki then nodded, ducking under his arm as he held the gate open for me.

“You should be, she really doesn’t like you.”

He let out a loaded sigh, walking into the garden after me.

“I gathered as such, though that begs to question why I was invited.”

“She’s making an effort for me and I appreciate that, just show her that you aren’t a complete ass and she’ll come around.”

“No promises.”

Rolling my eyes, I walked down the short alley and into the hustle and bustle of the back garden that belonged to Jayce’s sister, who was hosting a barbeque that we had graciously been invited to.

Well, more I had been invited to and had been told; “You can bring him too I suppose, if you want, just keep him out of trouble.”.

We knew that Jayce wasn’t a fan of Loki, which made her open invitation all the more touching.

She and Steven had proven to be great friends and it made my regret and embarrassment of her finding me crying outside my door only eight months ago just a little easier to handle.

Their support was something I could never repay, so I hoped that my offering of skewered kebabs ready for grilling would suffice for the time being.

I had spent the early afternoon prepping them with Loki, we’d made a selection of kebabs with a variety of meats, including beef, chicken and steak and vegetables such as bell peppers, aubergines and tomatoes.

Some were full meat, others full vegetable but most were a mixture and it had taken everything within us to not cook and eat them as we messed up my kitchen, something that I had tried to keep contained as we went but that didn’t stop a stock pile of packets from building up.

“There they are!”

Steven emerged from the gathered crowd to greet us, smiling widely with his arms open wide.

“About time you showed up,” he said, looking at the covered serving dishes in my hands and lowering his arms, settling instead for an over the shoulder half-hug with a back pat.

“Sorry, we got a little caught up,” I laughed softly, “time lost us.”

“Happen to the best of us,” he shrugged, turning his attention to Loki. “And you must be the troublemaker.”

He held a hand out to Loki, who gave him his signature smirk and took it, giving the man a firm handshake.

“The one and only.”

Although Jayce had undoubtedly told Steven about Loki, they had never met face to face or at least Loki never mentioned having met Steven in person, and it was a minor surprise to be him so welcoming as opposed to the uncertainty I had been expecting.

Though perhaps it shouldn’t have been a shock, it didn’t seem to be in Steven’s nature to be judgmental and cast people aside, he was the type who would rather witness things first-hand and make his own decisions from there.

“Welcome, hope you have a good time,” Steven said, looking back at the dish in my hand. “Want me to take that?”

“Oh, sure,” I smiled, sparing a glance at the tin foil of the top dish before passing them over. “The top one is vegetables only, I thought it’d be best to keep them separated.”

“Wise choice from a wise woman,” Steven chuckled, “well, make yourselves at home.”

He gave us a smile then turned away and made his way to the grills.

I looked up at Loki and gave a wavered smile, which prompted him to reach for my hand and give it a light squeeze.

“I know you don’t do well with meeting new people,” he said, “but you’ll be fine, so let us find a table and at least try to act sociable.”

I laughed as he pulled me forward towards a gap on the end of one of the tables and got us settled in.

It was closing in on an hour before I saw Jayce, the time between sitting down and seeing her spent mostly with meeting the people in her ever-expansive family and the few other friends of varying members who had been invited to the family affair like we had.

They were a great group of people, happy to introduce themselves to us and share things they had no doubts had to share a thousand times or more each time someone new came along.

The amount of people at the gathering was quite astounding and it boggled my mind that anyone had such a large family, let alone knew so many people in general.

Either way, both Loki and I were relieved to find ourselves welcomed with open arms to a bunch of strangers who had probably heard more about us than we had about them.

At the forty-minute mark, Loki had gotten up and wandered off to find us some drinks, returning with two cups and two sisters who were happily nattering his ears off.

“I found some stragglers,” he chuckled as he sat down, setting a cup in front of me.”

“Wow,” Jayce said, “rude.”

I laughed and stood up, leaning in the hug the taller woman tightly before pulling away to look at her sister, holding a hand out and introducing myself.

“You better put that hand away and open those arms,” she smiled widely, gently backhanding my palm before lunging at me and engulfing me in a tight hug. “Nice to meet you, I’m Trish, Jayce’s sister.”

I let out a small groan and a gasp, patting her back, “Y-You too.”

With how tight she was hugging me, I could thank my lucky stars that not everyone in Jayce’s family was this affectionate.

Trish eventually let me go and took a step back, putting her hands on her hips.

“I gave your boy a warning about playing up,” she said, a smile pulling at the corner of her lips, “one toe steps out of line and he’s out on his ass.”

“I’ve already promise to keep him in line.”

A scoff came from behind me and I knew that Loki had most likely rolled his eyes, but he otherwise stayed quiet.

Trish shot him a look, raising an eyebrow as I laughed.

They both settled at our table to catch-up for a while, much like they had been at the previous tables before reaching ours, much like a pair of brides at their wedding who had to speak to all wedding guests at least once before getting to enjoy the night properly.

“So,” Trish started, leaning against the table, “how long have you been dating?”

Loki and I shared a look then he smirked and turned away, sipping his drink while I let out a soft chuckle.

“We’re not dating, we’re just friends.”

The look she gave me could only be described as completely disbelieving but thankfully she didn’t push it, instead moved the subject onto what we did for work.

Conversations flowed smoothly and before we knew it a delicious smell started to fill the area, making my stomach grumble with anticipation, I’d forgone meals for the day in preparation for filling my stomach with barbeque food.

The night drew on with fantastic food and entertaining company, though I wasn’t usually one for social gatherings I was having a genuinely great time and Loki seemed to be in his element as well, regaling others with tales of his adventures both with and without the Avengers.

Night settled on us sooner than we anticipated and others slowly filtered out while I got caught by Trish, who had decided to show us a selection of photos from their childhood, one of beaming children who were merrily dressed up in boas and their mother’s high heels.

As Loki looked over one of the pictures, I caught a brief glance of what was written on the back, a date and two names, though one was crossed out and ‘Jayce’ was written beneath the line.

Meanwhile Jayce was sat there looking mortified, whining that it was obvious that her sister had had too much to drink when she cracked out the family photos for new guests.

A bite had come to the air before Trish’ partner coaxed her inside and said that it was time for them to call it a night, though we were welcome to stick around it we chose to.

We wished them a good night then turned back to Jayce and Steven.

“I guess we’ll call it a night as well,” I said with a smile, “but thank you so much for tonight, it’s been a lot of fun.”

“Anytime!” She replied a little too loudly. “I already can’t wait for next time.”

“It’s been great,” Steven nodded, looking to Loki, “and well done for keeping your cool.”

Loki raised his eyebrow but still smirked, “I’m not some kind of psychopath, I can control myself.”

“Not what I’d heard, but I totally believe you now.”

I laughed and stood up, tugging on Loki’s arm.

“Let’s go before you sit here arguing about what is and isn’t true.”

Loki sighed dramatically and stood up, giving a brief nod to Steven.

“As much as I would like to sit around and discuss such things, my lady is waiting and I don’t wish to displease her.”

I rolled my eyes with Steven chuckled, both him and Jayce wishing us a good night and promising to deliver my serving dish once it had been cleaned before turning to talk to the last of the stragglers.

I gave one last wave before entering the alleyway to leave via the back gate.

Luckily, we had decided to walk to the barbeque rather than drive with the anticipation of having a little bit of alcohol, so we had a twenty-minute walk back to my place to sober us up.

“Well,” I said, sliding my hands into my jacket pockets, “tonight was fun.”

“I have to admit, I had my doubts but I did find myself having a good time, they’re good people.”

“I’m glad you approve of our new friends.”

“Our?”

I looked up at him and smiled, giving him a little nudge with my shoulder.

“Of course, I think they liked you too.”

“I think they were merely humouring me as I was your date.”

“I doubt that, though they definitely seemed to think it was a proper date.”

I had laughed, though that died down when I noticed that Loki wasn’t laughing with me.

“Would it be so bad?”

Loki stopped walking and I took a few steps before noticing.

Stopping myself, I turned towards him and raised my eyebrows in question.

“Would what be so bad? Dating you?”

“Yes, exactly that.”

“No,” I smiled with a shrug, “I don’t think it would be, despite your title I think that you would be a very loyal partner.”

He looked at me with a lingering stare before nodding, a smile slipping into place as he took the few steps to catch up to me so that we could continue walking.

“Then perhaps it is time I tried asking you out again, now that I have earned your trust.”

I glanced up at him then turned my attention to the empty street we were walking down, letting the silence linger as I take things into consideration.

It had been a while since everything had happened and he had proven himself to be a worthwhile companion when he’s not trying to win some bet by causing havoc and heartache.

Letting out a small hum, I smiled and looked up at him again, marveling at how lucky I was to have gained such a friend in an otherworldly being when all was said and done.

He truly was a loyal and protective God, so he’d likely make an even better lover if he put genuine emotion into it.

“Perhaps it is, Loki,” I said, linking my arm through his, “perhaps it is.”