Chapter Text
For years, a vicious (but handsome) monster has haunted the Lachimolala Resorts lake. Terrorizing the campsite and wrecking havoc around the lake, while also preying on the poor innocent habitants:
"Aish" Seokjin sighed as he took a large gulp of his cheap beer, before throwing his fishing rod into the grumbly water once again.
"Excuse me, Sir." A tall, dimpled man in a tacky blue t-shirt coughed out. "I come from the Oceanic Preservation Society and-"
"Look, I don't want to donate anything so please go away, you're scaring away the dinner" Seokjin huffed from his stained foldable chair.
"Sir, that's not-" the man trailed off. "Me and my colleagues urge you to stop fishing in this lake since an endangered species of flatfish has been found in the area"
"Y'know flatfishes make great sashimi" Seokjin said dreamily while still staring out at the still water, already feeling his stomach rumble.
Suddenly he felt something pull at the fishing line, shooting up from his chair with exclamations of 'oh's and 'ah's falling out while he desperately reeled in his catch.
Another cough was heard, "Sir, I strongly suggest you stop reeling in now"
"As if!" Seokjin huffed, reeling in that line as if his life depended on it while already making up a plan for his catch. "Some lemon, ginger, maybe a little soy sauce" he mumbled to himself, feeling the weight of the catch as it neared the surface. That's when his rod was brusquely snatched from his hands, broken in two and carefully put into the wastebin by the shoreline.
"Yah! What the living hell!? Seokjin yelled making fists and glaring at the nerdy fish-friend standing beside the wastebin looking mighty pleased with himself, sending Seokjin a stern gaze that under other circumstances might have left a tingle in Seokjins stomach, but not now. This was war!
"I'm sorry for the inconvenience, please file a claim to our department and you will be refunded the cost of any equipment that might have been damaged, and on the behalf of the Oceanic Preservation Society I would like to thank you for your cooperation" the man said all robot like, staring at a point right above Seokjins face, the light blush to his cheeks the only thing giving away him actually being human.
"File?...might have been?....my...WHAT!?" Seokjin sputtered, glaring at the man as if he wanted to drill holes into his stupid robotesque (although handsome, wait who said that?) face. "Do you have ANY idea who I am?" Seokjin asked, straightening his back and puffing his chest out, knowing his wide shoulder made him look quite intimidating.
"In fact I do not, Sir. As I said before, you're allowed to file a claim regarding damages-
"I'll file a claim over the damage your brain very apparently has! I am THE master-fisher in the Lachimolala territory, how dare you come and break my fishing rod like this!" Seokjin snarled. "You will regret this, fish-boy!" he yelled before stomping away towards the group of trailers and cabins nearby.
"Jungkook!" he shouted. "Help me make one of those trendy bird-app, expose-threads!"
-
Against his demands and threats, Jungkook had refused to Tweet about the stupid douchebag, claiming it was "morally right of him" to break his rod. Kids these days with their stupid moral and environmental care, Seokjin muttered as he walked into his old timber cabin.
As the next day came, Seokjin realized that he had to resort to different tactics if he was going to win against the stupid fish-friend and his stupidly handsome face. Seokjin laughed evilly as he pulled out his trusty, old fishnet out of the closet.
The day went by slowly, slowly while Seokjin stayed in his cabin, hunched by the window, carefully monitoring the lake while still laughing evilly. As dusk came both his back and throat hurt, but he was ready. All clad in black (except for his beige fishing-west with all it's handy pockets, can't go fishing without it now can he?) he slowly opened the creaking door, listening closely for any suspicious sounds, like say robotic steps or someone singing Kumbaya or the likes.
He presumed to sneak down to the dock, using the thickening fog as cover. He silently waded out in the water and hid among the reeds. No sight of Nerdy Mc-fish face. He snickered victoriously to himself as he pulled out his net. He was just about to throw it as someone coughed behind him.
"Fancy seeing you here Mr. Fish murderer"
"Wish I could say the same Mr. 'my ass is flatter than a flatfish" Seokjin said with a glare. Watching in amusement as the man scoffed in offense.
"Excuse you? My ass is NOT flat!"
Damn it, he was right. Seokjin might despise the guy, but he wasn't blind and he do be thiccer than a king salmon.
"Your ass is almost as flat as your brain, and that says a lot!" he yelled in frustration.
"Well maybe if your ass didn-" he began before someone loudly swung open a cabin door.
"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE SHUT THE HELL UP ABOUT YOUR BEHINDS! IT'S 2AM, I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!"
"Sorry Yoongi! I'll make you lunch tomorrow?!" Seokjin shouted back, feeling a bit guilty.
"See? You're waking people up so just let me do my thing in peace, okay?" he whisper-shouted.
"Never, I won't let you harm those innocent creatures. Just imagine-"
The man blabbered on as Seokjin grew more and more frustrated at his meaningless chatter. The grip on his fishnet tightened and when the nerd had made his sixth Finding Nemo reference, he snapped.
"Yah! Shut up you fish-freak!" Seokjin yelled as he subconsciously threw the large net at the man in front of him.
"Wh- what are you... get me out of here!" he shouted in despair as he got even more tangled up with his every move to get free.
Seokjin might've considered helping him out if it wasn't for the VERY angry Yoongi walking towards them with a baseball bat.
"See you around!" he spluttered thoughtlessly and ran aways towards the safety of his cabin.