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I was awoken by a voice that sounded familiar, at least I thought it did. It sounded a bit different than the one I was used to.
"feetmaaaaaaaaannnnnnn," The voice croaked as I was shaken in my bed, "please help meeeeeeee." I groaned and rubbed my eyes.
"Okay, Okay! You can stop now! I'm up!" I turned around to face where the voice came from. Benrey. "Jesus, man, the hell happened to you?"
"i don't knowwww!! i need you to help meeeee!!!!" He said as I sighed and reached for his forehead- I flinched back
"Ow-" I shook my hand, "How the *fuck* is your head that hot?!"
"i feel like i'm burning up from the insiiiiideee."
"Okay, just uh, go lay down or something," I gestured him to lay down on our bed, "And stay away from me, I don't want to catch whatever you have."
"no kisses?????" He said in a disappointed tone. I placed a cold towel over his head. He hissed at me. He hissed at me and swatted the towel off his head.
"No! You need that! It'll make you feel better."
"too cooooldldddcmnccmv"
"Just keep it on." I decided I would just let him decide if he wanted to have it. I left the room to get some sort of thing for him to play with, that would keep him occupied at least. 'How did he even get sick anyway?' I thought. 'He's "not human", and he can regenerate no matter how much you damage him.'
'...Maybe... a bug? Like a computer bug? I guess that would make s-'
My thoughts were cut off by an ungodly noise. I dropped what I was doing and ran to my bedroom.
"GORDON. I CAN'T BREATHE." I watched as he pointed to his throat, "THERES SOMETHING STUCK."
I grabbed a tissue and put it to his mouth, "Cough into this." A very aggressive cough followed, and some sort of glitchy mess flew into the tissue, "What..."
"is that not supposed to happen?"
"For NORMAL people, no." I left the room to go back to what I was doing, and came back with a switch, "Maybe it is for you, want to play Mario Kart?"
"...sure"
For the next hour we played Mario Kart for the Nintendo Switch, Benrey occasionally stopping to cough, and also trying to get closer to me but I stayed far, far away. He won every race. After that, he passed out. I made myself some breakfast and decided it should call someone from the Science Team and see if they could help. Tommy knew how to read Benrey's BMSV™ so I figured he would be the most help.
Ring! Ring!
"Hello?"
"Tommy! Oh god Tommy please help me."
"What happened, Mr. Freeman?"
"Benrey got sick and I don't know how to help him. You know how to read the BMSV™ so I thought you would know something."
I don't really trust the others that much anyway.
"I think I read something in a book about sicknesses!"
"Oh, great! Can you come over?"
"Right away!"
A surprisingly short amount of time later (a scarily short amount of time, how did he even get here that fast?), Tommy arrived. I greeted him and walked him over to where Benrey slept.
"Oh no."
"What?"
"That looks bad."
I laughed, "Feel his head."
"Ouch!"
"I know, right? That's not normal."
"Maybe uh, medicine? Do you have any medicine, Mr. Freeman?"
"Not right now, I haven't needed any in a while. Wait."
"What?"
"Maybe Darnold could help? Y'know since he makes potions."
"Good idea, Mr. Freeman! I don't want to see this get any worse!"
With Benrey wrapped in a blanket and placed on my back, I walked to Darnold's house. It wasn't far from mine surprisingly so I didn't see the point in driving, in fact, it was only a turn away.
"Mr. Freeman! Welco- is that what you called me about?"
"...Yes. He got sick."
"Oh no, that seems like a rather bad cold!" He said as Benrey coughed right into my ear.
"Was that on purpose?" I said as I tried not to get too freaked out about the very colourful shapes on the side of my head.
"your head was in the way."
"No need to fear, I have something for these types of colds!"
"That's great! You know, despite the fact that you turned my arm into a gun, you really are something, Darnold."
"Yes... Thank you. I'll go and find it."
After a few minutes, he came back with a box-shaped glass (or more likely plastic) bottle filled with a transparent liquid with a slight yellow tinge to it.
"Here! My very super secret potion that cures all illnesses."
"Your WHAT?" I stood there in shock, "EVERY ILLNESS? EVERYTHING?"
"Yes! I am sure it will work, even for a cold as bad as this. Though, there is one problem."
"What?"
"It's side effects are unknown."
"I'm sure those won't hurt him, I mean, he can regenerate."
"i'll do anything to get rid of this."
"Well, drink up!"
After we got home, Benrey seemed much better. His head was a normal temperature and was no longer coughing. Though something seemed... off. The back of his clothes kept twitching and he kept making weird noises, though weird noises were normal for him.
"bro i think the side effects have taken effect."
"What do you mean?"
"look." He took off his wool hat and underneath were... cat ears.
Cat ears. On his head.
"Oh." My hand covered my mouth, "Oh my god."
"yeah."
"You're a... You're a 'catboy'."
"my dream has come true." He said in a monotone voice.
"I- I guess you'll just have to eat cat food now. I'll get you a scratching post!"
"no!!! i'm not a cat!"
"Yeah, sure, what's that behind you?" I laughed as I pulled his tail out from under his clothes.
"aauasggags" He said as he sang dark blue balls into the air, "don't do thaaaat!!"
I giggled. He suited being a catboy. I pat him on the head as he sulked.
"Silly."
(on the phone lol)
"'Cat... Boy'. I didn't expect that! Nice to know the side effects aren't that bad."
"Do you know how long it'll last? I don't really mind but I don't know about him. He seems pretty sad about it."
"I'm sorry, Mr. Freeman, I don't know. I guess we'll just have to see!"
"At least he's not sick anymore I guess..."
"Pspspspsppsps."
"that's not gonna work, bro."
"Well, you're here, right?"
"o- oh."
"There's no point getting sad about it, Darnold says he doesn't know if it'll go away or not."
"..."
"It's better than having a cold, yeah?"
".............."
"C'mere, come sit in my lap"
"i'm NOT your cat," He says as I pout at him, "...fine." He growled.
"Hehe... Was that a growl? Like an actual growl?"
"huh. what."
"You definitely growled. That's so cute. You're like an actual cat."
Light pink balls escaped from his mouth
"I wonder if you can purr..."
"go and try it."
I picked him up, he immediately started scrambling and trying to get away from me. I laughed, and held him tight as I pet him.
I was right. He started purring.
"Holy fucking shit."
"wasn't it my job to annoy you?"
"How the tables have turned..."