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What even was this movie?
You once again rued the fact that you had agreed to go with Connor and Ryan. Another weird sci-fi disaster movie, another Saturday night spent being a third wheel. No matter how much you loved the two of them, it would never be fun to be the third on what clearly looked like a goddamn date. You had hoped the movie would be distracting enough, but it just wasn’t your thing. At all. You were probably biased, but it just- ugh. Not into it.
“This doesn’t make sense.”
“Sh!”
The whispers came from a few rows behind you, and you couldn’t help but laugh. They were right- it didn’t make sense. What were they even doing? Something with a nuclear bomb- that was as far as you could understand.
“10,000 nuclear weapons? That’s a vast underestimation.”
“Sh!”
Holy shit. Your friends had rolled their eyes at the comments, but come on man. It was hysterical. You tried to hold back your laughter, ending up snorting loudly. That earned you a glare from the other people around you.
Despite your best efforts to focus on the movie, you just couldn’t. It had come out almost two decades ago- why were you watching it now? You should have been more insistent on picking the movie. Or maybe you should have just stayed home and watched HGTV with your cat.
“There’s no asteroid as large as Texas in the solar system- the largest is only 560 miles across.”
“It’s a movie.”
This guy would not stop. You let out another loud laugh which turned into stifled giggles as Connor elbowed you in the side. The woman on the other side of you turned to scowl and you almost lost it again. This could not be real.
Compose yourself, compose yourself. You took a deep breath, leaning forward in the seat. If you could just get yourself to stare at the screen, you’d have to get into it eventually. Right?
Wrong. You were lost. It was too late for you.
“That’s just a real Space Shuttle, that’s not the X-71.”
“Come on, man!”
You had caught that error at least. Unfortunately you couldn’t stop yourself from laughing at that one either. Whoever this guy was, he had a point. And it was hilarious. The hilarity of the commentary from behind you combined with the disapproving glares flying around the theater? Priceless. You might actually pee your pants.
“That’s impossible. The bomb would have to detonate with the same amount of energy as the sun.”
“Shut the fuck up.”
The whispers turned into hushed hisses, the two voices apparently arguing with one another.
That was it. You were done. Your laughter turned into a near cackle as you dropped your head into your hands. It only got worse the more Connor elbowed you. The same woman from before now looked like she wanted to murder you with her bare hands. And she had to be at least seventy.
You were wheezing now, unable to stop giggling. People in front of you- the same ones who had been sighing at that person’s commentary- were now turning around to glare at you.
Ryan leaned over Connor towards you. “Please. Get your shit together.”
He meant it with the utmost love. You nodded, tears in your eyes as you stood up to leave. Pushing past the older woman was a monumental task, and it only made you laugh harder.
People turned to watch you walk down the aisle towards the exit. If you had more dignity, you probably would have been embarrassed. As it was- you were just glad to get out of that movie.
You burst through the doors into the near-empty lobby, still chuckling to yourself as you tried to catch your breath. Idiot. At least now there was time to get a snack.
The snack bar was blissfully empty and you found yourself sitting at one of the sticky tables with a bag of sour candy. No use rushing back to the movie- you wouldn’t understand anything anyway.
After killing as much time as possible, you supposed it was time to head back. You were just about to open the door when you noticed someone on the bench in the hallway. He was sitting with his head in his hands, staring at the ground. His foot tapped rapidly on the floor, his purple Converse bouncing against the tile. He was cute, you noted. Stressed out maybe, but cute.
“You good?”
Apparently this man had no idea that you were standing right there, because he almost fell off of the bench. He caught himself, his foot stilling as he blinked at you for a second. “Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. I’m just-”
“Oh my god,” you said with a laugh, realizing that you recognized his voice. “You’re the guy!”
This only served to startle him more. You imagined you probably sounded like the most terrifying stranger right now.
“Excuse me?” he asked. The more you stared at him, the more he seemed to squirm. You retracted your previous statement- he was really cute.
Absolutely no way you were going back in the theater now. You plopped down on the bench beside him. His eyes somehow got even wider than they already were.
“You’re the guy!” you repeated. “The ‘the largest asteroid is only 550 miles across’ guy.”
“560,” he said. The moment he spoke he looked like he regretted it, turning his attention back to the floor.
Now it was your turn to stare at him. “You’re funny.” You held out your bag of candy to him. “Want some?”
Evidently this was not what he had expected to hear. He looked from you to the candy then back to you. Finally he reached in, carefully selecting a purple candy.
The two of you sat chewing in mildly awkward silence. “Why are you out here?” you asked.
“My friends kicked me out,” he admitted almost sheepishly.
You scoffed at that. “My friends kicked me out too.”
“Why?”
“I couldn’t stop laughing at what you were saying.”
The man’s face turned bright red, and he looked away from you again. It seemed like he was trying to look anywhere but at you.
You quickly realized how mean what you had just said sounded as you watched him shift uncomfortably. “No, no, I wasn’t laughing at you! Just like- you were so funny! And you were right. That movie was terrible- and horribly inaccurate.”
He turned back to glance at you, and this time it felt like he was studying your face. Almost like he was trying to size up exactly how truthful you were being. Apparently you passed his test, because he broke out into a wide smile. You held out the bag of candy again, grinning when he accepted.
“It’s so inaccurate,” he huffed, causing you to let out another loud laugh. His eyes lit up when he heard it. “Wait- it was you! I heard you. Wow, you really wouldn’t stop laughing.”
You elbowed him in the side, giggling again. “Hey, I might have been the one laughing, but you were the one making me laugh.”
This was apparently the right thing to say, because the look on his face? You felt the sudden strange urge to keep it there forever. You weren’t sure you had ever seen a more wonderful look on a more wonderful face.
“I’m Y/N, by the way,” you offered.
“Spencer.”
You weren’t normally one to be so forward with a complete stranger, but something about him just made you want to keep talking to him- to make him more than just a stranger. It was now or never.
“Well, Spencer. What do you think about watching a movie with me sometime? We’ll have to pick a perfectly terrible one so we can nitpick it to death together.”
Spencer looked like he might fall off the bench again as he gaped at you, his cheeks flushing again. “I- I. Um, yeah. Yeah, I would like that.”
“Excellent.” You held out the candy bag one last time, like a silent pledge. He picked another purple piece, grinning shyly at you. He must like purple. You made a mental note of that for in the future- just in case. It might come in handy, you never know.
“I’m really glad we got exiled.”