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“You’re eating…” Felix presses through gritted teeth, “like you hate it.”
Lysithea will later give him an earful if she ever finds out that he is pissing at their customers but Goddess what’s up with this man who eats his award-winning cakes as if he is eating a fucking sponge! The dark chocolate ganache tart that guy is munching on is one of Felix’s signature treats. Annette drools all over herself the moment he brings it into her vision.
But this guy!
He just shoves it in his face, eyes staring at the documents laid out in front of him. Felix could have switched the tart with a Nutella toast and that fool would not notice. There was no attention to the perfection Felix has created.
On the contrary, the frown on his face even suggests that it is an impertinence to eat!
“Come on, Felix,” Claude waves off, playful tone to his voice the moment he smirks. “Don’t scare my colleague. We’ve got important things to discuss.”
Blue eyes stare at the two of them, darting back and forth, likely wondering whether the two know each other and unfortunately, the answer is yes. Claude has been studying at the same university as him. Computer Science, it was. One of the worst decisions he made in his life but at least he took one semester off to intern in Derdriu and then his destiny was signed.
The company was shit but the one good thing he got out of it was that he discovered Patisserie Ordelia. Involuntarily at first, considering how much he used to hate sweets. But soon enough he was so sold that he facetimed his dad to tell him he’ll stay in Derdriu.
Permanently.
To become a pâtissier.
His dad’s face, the moment he told him, was golden.
He had taken a screenshot, printed it out, framed it and hung it up next to his bed. Every single day, he opens his eyes and sees his dad’s face, eyes popping out, nose flared, mouth gaping wide open, an elephant could enter… Yes. He made the right decision if only to spite his old man.
The four awards on his dresser, too, are evidence that he made the right choice. One per year ever since he started his apprenticeship at Lysithea’s. People love his creations, love the details he puts into every single piece. He has mastered the usage of sugar the way it enhances the taste of the ingredients instead of drowning it. He is able to compose melodies of flavors, so intricate, complex and subtle that juries have cried tasting it.
And then there is this uncultivated fiend in front of him!
“Well, I’m sorry if my eating habits disrespect you.” He raises a brow in apology. “It was not my intention. I am sure this is very lovely for some peo-”
“For some?!” This audacity! Felix nearly stomps his feet but instead just clenches his fist, his jaw, glaring daggers at the stranger. “Do you know who I am?!” Who the hell does he think he is?!
“This,” Claude points at the black haired with one hand, “is Felix. A cactus.”
“Fuc-”
“This,” Claude interrupts his legitimate eruption, ready to throw them out of the shop right here, right this moment, “is Dimitri. My new colleague who will be here the next few months. Be nice to him Felix. We’ll come here often.” A mischievous smile paints itself on his face as he winks. “You’ll have plenty of occasions to convince him of your skills.”
The challenge is on.
Felix never lets a challenge pass. Especially not from Claude. Felix will conquer this man’s palate, will make him cry from the overwhelming beauty of cakes. After all cake is the divine essence of the heavens . This much he has learnt from Lysithea.
He shoots Dimitri one last glare before he disappears behind the counter, plotting his revenge.
The two of them stay true to their words, visiting the patisserie nearly every other day. Claude always stares at him expectantly, knowing that he can provide them with the best of the best.
And Felix does. His hands glide over the glass, press down against the cover, pointing at the creamiest cheesecake, the freshest eclairs, the fluffiest strawberry roll. When he prepares the treats, he makes sure to provide them with the most exquisite garnish, positions the pieces in an impeccable constellation. It is a feast for the eyes, a festival for the senses. Each time Felix is sure the time has come. Dimitri will acknowledge his skill.
But this swine does not.
Dimitri eats it like he hates it. So utterly carelessly that Felix wants to rip out his hair. No highlight of nougat flavor, no spark of apricot cream, no accent of caramelized rosemary can evoke as much as a rise of a brow.
He eats his desserts the way a cow chews on grass.
“Felix,” the man utters flustered. “The thing is…”
“I don’t need an amateur to teach me!” Felix presses out indignant, stomping off to work on the Sacher Torte Leonie wants for her birthday. Better to pour his energy into creating cakes for people who know how to appreciate his skill. And his flat mate surely does.
***
“Nonsense!” Felix sneers. “Nobody can resist something so delicious!”
He has fed Dimitri everything in his repertoire. Spongy, crispy, creamy, fruity, milky, hearty, rich or light… You. Name. It. Months have passed, and he has not managed to crack the code. What is it that Dimitri likes, that makes his eyes go wide in anticipation for more?
All this clown ever offers Felix is a mildly amused uptick of the corner of his lip. A taunt at all his efforts at arousing a sparkle in Dimitri’s eyes.
Nowadays the blonde often comes alone smiling up to him waiting for the selection of sweets and tea Felix has to offer. Chin resting on his interlaced fingers, gingerly smiling at him, sweet almost, little creases decorating the corner of his eyes. Instead of appreciating his work, he tells him about his day, asks Felix about places he should visit while he is in Derdriu.
There is this eerie feeling… that perhaps Dimitri is interested in him. And Felix doesn’t know what to do with it, knows that he is terrible at understanding what people are thinking, especially what they think about him. Most of the time it is annoying that Dimitri chats him up while he is clearly busy, waiting at other tables. But sometimes… sometimes… sometimes it was maybe nice.
“You know…” Claude smiles at Felix one day. Felix can see the glint in his eyes. The sweet smile is unable to deceive him. This guy is up to something. Like he always is. “You should try to get to know him better! It will make it easier to understand what he likes. You’re basically shooting in the dark!” He slides a ticket over the counter. “He’s been wanting to do a canal tour. I’ve done it a million times already.” A shrug of his shoulder. Of course, he did. He’s been living in Derdriu since he was a teen. “You’ve been here for years but never got to know the city! It’s high time, don’t you think? You can’t always keep baking!” With a wink, he gives the ticket a pat before waving goodbye, marching out of the patisserie without paying.
Felix stares after him. Let’s his gaze glide to the ticket, then to the coffee mug which still stands on the table Claude occupied. There is no cash on it.
When Felix storms out of the shop, the man is already gone probably laughing up his sleeve.
There is no small amount of surprise on Dimitri’s face when instead of a piece of cake Felix shoves the ticket into his face.
“I’m not asking you out or anything!” Felix flushes. “I just happen to have this ticket!” Damn, the fuck is he saying? Claude can go fuck himself for putting Felix in this situation. He pulls his hand back, avoiding the other’s gaze, hand raking through his bangs, hoping to hide his blush.
“I’d love to!” Dimitri huffs. “Actually, I wanted to ask you, too! But you even bought tickets! Let me treat you to dinner after, will you?”
Carefully, Felix darts his gaze at the other man. His heart stutters at the sight of the smile which blooms on Dimitri’s lips, too warm and way too bright.
Goddess, that skip of his heart doesn’t feel healthy. Maybe Felix should check a doctor.
***
Derdriu looks different from the water. Smaller… Prettier even. Like a cozy town.
The reflection of the city shimmers in the water, mirroring the world above in an enchanted way. Waves lick at the gondola Dimitri and Felix sit in. Softly rocking up and down as the gondolier sings one sappy song after another, ruining the mood in an egregious way.
Compared to Annette or Dorothea this man sings like a rusted tin canister.
“Are you enjoying yourself?” Dimitri pulls his hand out of the water which he had dipped in, letting it glide alongside the boat. He turns around to face him.
Arms crossed in front of his chest, Felix glances at the bridge they are heading for. Little kids glimpse over the railing, waving at them and Dimitri waves back with a smile causing Felix to feel an irksome pull in his chest. Irritated, he looks to the side, at the cobbled road, lined with old little houses. Most of them had flowers on their windowsills.
“Yeah,” he says, unsure of what else he can say right now. Even if the gondolier is annoying, it isn’t too bad to be sitting here.
“You’re from Faerghus, aren’t you?”
Surprised, Felix raises an eyebrow at the question. Nobody ever guesses him to be from Faerghus here. Usually everyone always considers him a Dagdan thanks to his mother’s genes. Even if he tells them that he was born in Faerghus they will eye him suspiciously, asking him if he is sure. As if he doesn’t know where the fuck he was born. A little unbelieving, he purses his lips. “Claude told you?”
A chuckle escapes the blonde which he tries to cover with a hand. Unnecessary polite as always. “No, your accent gives you away. Definitely from the Northeast of Faerghus. Are you perhaps from Colan?”
The black-haired nods warily. Is his accent really noticeable? Nobody has ever recognized it. “And you are?”
“From Fhirdiad!” Dimitri beams, smile a little toothy as he reveals himself as a countryman. It’s not like Felix feels particularly strongly about being from Faerghus. In fact, he didn’t miss it a day ever since he left. First for Garreg Mach, next for Derdriu. So, he only snorts. “No wonder!” He huffs. “All the snobs are from Fhirdiad.”
“All the grumps are from Colan.”
Felix shoots him a glare for dumping on his hometown. Maybe, out of the whole country, Colan is still a city he somehow harbors something akin to nostalgic feelings for. After all he grew up there, spent a carefree childhood in a loving home or so he thought.
Not liking the direction of his thoughts, he bites his lips, grabbing for the box in his bag. “Come on.” He holds out the little box containing pralines. “Everyone knows Colan is the better city. Fhirdhiad is too full of wanna-by hipsters. Let’s… Let’s…” He points at the box. “I made these for y-” Fucking Goddess. “I had nothing better to do!” Why is it so exhausting to talk?!
There it is again, the amused little tug at the corner of Dimitri’s lips. He takes the box graciously, picking out one of the rose-colored pralines. Fixing the ball of sweet delight between his thumb and index, he holds it up to Felix’s face. “It looks lovely. You should have one first.”
The smile on his lips is telling. The rise of his brows encouraging. He is flirting, right? Felix’s eyes dart between Dimitri’s face and the praline between his fingers, assessing the situation. Dimitri is cute. He knew from day one. Otherwise he might wouldn’t have bothered to feed him so many treats if the other did not catch his interest. But this… isn’t it a bit too straightforward? A bit of a leap? Though, he has already been visiting the patisserie every other day for months now. Is Felix being a prude? Maybe…
Felix never passes on a challenge.
So, he leans forwards, mouths at the praline, tugging it out of Dimitri’s fingers with his lips.
Dimitri gapes at him astonished, mouth opening and closing again. A bright shade of red veiling his cheeks as his eyes widen.
Oh, shit. Was he not flirting?
“Felix, you…”
There is the sparkle, Felix has been hoping to see. It’s just that it isn’t directed at his treats but at him. So, clearly unconcealed at him that Felix feels a pang in his chest, a stutter of his heart. He grips at the front of his parka, pressing down in hope of calming the ridiculous pounding in his chest.
“You know, for me your treats will never be as sweet to me as you.” The blonde smiles.
Felix grabs back onto the railing to have something to lean on.
Except, he misses and falls into the canal.
A smooth way to end a conversation.
The next day, Lysithea scans him up and down. “You, sir, have a crush.”
“I don’t!” Felix sneezes, still shivering, trying to expel the cold out of his bones. He decides to make himself a latte macchiato. Something warm to heat him up from within. Bathing in the canal really did not do him any good. Even if Dimitri has fished him out of the water and rushed him to the apartment he is staying at, rubbing him dry from head to toe and feeding him delivery pizza and chamomile tea while he was wrapped in blankets.
Which wasn’t bad.
Curled up together in a comfy fortress of pillows and blankets, it was even nicer than the promised dinner and he can still claim the dinner later.
The silver haired lady just shakes her head. “Life is too short to forego the sweet things.”
Felix drops the mug in his hand. The sound of the shattering porcelain is crystal clear. Sharp and painful in his ears.
“Don’t say that,” he whispers.
***
Over time, Felix figures Dimitri quite enjoys the mixture of different textures.
They have been seeing each other. A lot. After all Dimitri only stays for one more month before he will return to Fhirdiad. All gentleman, Dimitri comes to the patisserie after his own work, has a glass of water or a cup of coffee, occasionally a new sweet which Felix and Lysithea came up with and then spends the evening with Felix.
Often, they have dinner together, for instance at a restaurant which Dimitri wants to try before he leaves.
“The Almyran influence on the cuisine here is quite exciting,” he has said, a brow perked up. “I like the aromatic fragrance. And the crispness of these!” He pointed at the falafel on his plate.
Felix also has brought him to his favorite places, distributed over the whole city. There is this nice kebab place which does an amazing job at seasoning the meat. Every Sunday at the fish market, there is one hidden little booth which offers fantastic squid, roasted over an open flame. Once in a while, he invites Dimitri over, preparing a heavy feast to Leonie’s joy. Roast Wild Boar. Potatoes, turnips and carrots decorate the tender slices of meat. “Ah, it’s so nice to eat some Faerghun dish!” Dimitri rejoices, corners of his eyes crinkling in delight.
Sometimes they just sit at the bund, feet dangling over the water, watching the reflections of the city swimming in the ocean, big cruise ships floating by, talking about the mundane things in life, about why cats are clearly superior to dogs, about annoying customers at the patisserie who think they were somehow special snowflakes, about whether pineapples go on pizza or not – obviously they don’t but Dimitri likes the acidy juiciness of the pineapples…
The bund is a hotspot for couples, Felix knows. They scurry around like flies, but it is so vast, lining the coast, that everyone finds their little space. The rushing of the waves muffling other people’s conversation into soft murmurs.
“Dimitri…” Felix has pulled his legs to his chest, staring out onto the ocean, unable to make out where the water ends and where the night sky begins, unable to tell where the specs of light were reflections in the waves or where it was already the stars shining upon them. Pursing his lips, he thinks about whether he should voice his question, feeling glad that it was too dark for the other to see the color on his cheeks. “Are we… are we dating?”
His face burns once the words escape his lips. And it feels so stupid to ask. But he has no experience with any of this, most of the time isn’t sure what is going on in other people’s heads and runs headfirst into a wall of embarrassment. His mom regularly calls him to remind him of his romantical failures. “Have you finally found a guy? Felix, I’m not getting any younger!” He sees her tipping at the watch on her wrist, pouting through the camera. “My clock says it’s time for me to be grandma!” “Ma! I’m gay!” he groans, dragging his hands over his face. “I know, so find a reliable handsome guy and adopt a baby!”
Fucking! Goddess!
“Are we?” The tone of Dimitri’s voice is a mixture of confused and bemused. “Do you want us to be?”
Lysithea and Hilda have dragged him and Marianne into enough shitty romance movies that he knows the answer. He knows the answer. The yes is lying heavy on his tongue and is about to roll off if only his lips weren’t so stubbornly pressed together, unwilling to budge!
“Maybe?” he presses out.
Goddess, his mom will punch the daylight out of him if she ever figures how pathetically he is fucking up. Not to mention Lysithea who has been telling him for months to get his shit together.
“I want us to be,” Dimitri smiles at him.
A sigh of relief escapes Felix. “Holy fuck. Nice save,” he thinks, only to hear a laughter rumbling through the other’s chest, forcing him to bury his face in his hands at the realization that he can’t keep his mouth shut.
Either way the result is the same. The next day he tells Lysithea, she just lets out an exasperated sigh. “You’ve been dating for the last two months!” Felix simply shrugs his shoulder whatever. With this story out of his way there was only one challenge for him to overcome.
“You know?” Claude huffs as he watches him rolling out the dough for the puff pastry sheet. “Making Dimitri say-” He clears his throat, voice dipping deeper. “ This tastes amazing… is not the hill you want to die on.”
Oh, yes, it is . Felix dignifies the other with pointed ignorance, folding the dough, rolling out again and folding it again to roll it like a wrap, putting it into the fridge to rest. Without looking, he grabs a bowl to assemble the ingredients for the cream, heating up milk in another pot parallelly.
It takes time to master excellent puff pastry. The first few times he burns it. Often the dough doesn’t want to rise, and it turns out too greasy, lacking in the puffiness, the crispness it is supposed to have. Sometimes the consistency is too firm, impossible to part with a cake fork. But he has to master it, learn how to do it by hand so he can enrich it, adding the nuances to conquer Dimitri’s palate.
During the day he perfects the recipe. During the evening, he is basically glued to Dimitri. Leonie asks him if he still lives in their flat, earning a snarl that he will annoy her every day once Dimitri has left.
***
“This!” Dimitri’s hand is shaking, the little fork in it continuously pointing at the pastry. The excitement in his eye forced a glee onto Felix’s lips which he cannot hide. Doesn’t want to hide. Because he has done it. He has created something that causes Dimitri to quiver in sheer rapture.
“This is delicious!” Quickly, his fork split off another piece. His eyes closing as he savors the guilty pleasure, the symphony of flavors.
The mille-feuille Dimitri is indulging in, is Felix’s latest masterpiece. The puff pastry has reached its peak, every contact sounding like an autumn walk, the way colorful leaves crunch beneath every step. He has worked chili into the dough for a touch of spiciness. The top layer was caramelized using a burner. He has dusted icing sugar onto it, melting it with a burner right in front of Dimitri’s eyes. Three layers of puff pastry make out this glorious mille-feuille. Between the bottom and middle layer, he has created a rich lavender buttercream, adding crushed pistachios for the extra crunch. The middle layer and the top layer are separated by a chocolate ganache and a mint-basil gel. On top of the mille-feuille he has placed one singular raspberry for a subtle garnish.
Incredulous, Dimitri raises the plate to take in the details. “I cannot tell what you have done here but the composition of textures is extraordinary! I have never eaten puff pastry this airy before! Usually, the layers stick to each other and don’t appear to be half as… loose? And the caramelized top! It is so crunchy. I also like the way it sticks to the tongue.” His fork points at the buttercream. “This cream here. It is phenomenal! It is so- so fluffy! And velvety on the tongue. I can sense the… buttery aroma but at the same time there is this- this- this flowery freshness! It is amazing how it harmonizes with the mint gel! It is like a breath of fresh air. The combination of the gel which is so liquid and this cream here!” Pointing at the ganache. “This cream is firm and smooth. The contrast is so nice. Also, the contrast between the cool and refreshing gel and the hot top puff pastry layer!” The young man nods approvingly, a thumb and index finger pressed together in a circle to emphasize his appreciation.
Felix puffs out his chest at the rain of compliments because oh yes, he deserves it. A smile on his lips, he hasn’t carried in a long, long time. He didn’t even know he could muster.
“The taste! The taste!” he cheers. “What do you think about the taste!”
“Oh, the taste…” Dimitri calms down, suddenly a faintly somber expression settling on his prior joyful face. “I don’t know about the taste…”
Felix nearly smacks the pastry out of his hand if it isn’t for Lysithea who gets a hold of his arm, holding him back before he can send the pastry flying.
***
“You know, Felix?” Dimitri whispers into his ear.
“Hm?”
Slowly, Felix looks up to the other. Color rising to his cheeks at the sudden proximity of the other leaning down. They stand in front of each other. In front of the train. A little unsure of what to say, what to do, now that they have to part. A mille feuille of feelings between them, a thousand miles parting them.
“There is one thing I haven’t told you…”
There was a flutter in Felix’s heart. Anticipation tugging at his lips. He looks up at the other, searching for his eyes.
He is about to say it, isn’t he?
I love you.
Hilda has sworn he will. So Felix forces himself to look into Dimitri’s eyes, to sink into the ocean of his gaze. No matter how hard it is for him to keep eye contact, he wants to see the look in the other’s eyes, the moment he says it, those three words nobody has ever told him.
Except, his mom.
Dimitri takes hold of Felix’s hand, grip firm as if he was afraid of losing him.
“I can’t taste anything”
His grip is iron, rendering Felix unable to wriggle out his hand and smack the light out of this- of this-
“What the fuck! The fuck!!” A waterfall of curses streams out of Felix’s mouth, before Dimitri presses a kiss to the corner of his eye, kissing away the tears which shamelessly took the chance to break out of the dam holding them back alongside the curses shooting out of his mouth. Letting go of Felix’s hand, he ducks away, easily dodging Felix’s punch before it can connect with his jaw, hopping onto the train, waving Felix goodbye.
“Take care, Felix! I look forward to your next pastry!” The smile he beams is blinding and Felix can barely see through the veil of tears and snot, wildly rubbing his sleeves over his face to clear his sight.
A whistle sounds at the track, signaling the departure of the train. Felix lunges forward but his hands hit the already closed doors.
“Get out, you asshole!” he screams through a sob. Is this guy for real?!
Felix can see Dimitri mouth a few words, he squints to make out what he is trying to say but the tears cloud his vision.
It is only when the train clicks, starting its movement that Dimitri raises his voice, barely above the squeal of the wheels against the tracks, difficult for Felix to make out what he is trying to say. Only tingling in his ear, lingering in his mind moments after the train is already gone.
Felix, I love you!