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Chapter Text

After a lengthy healing sleep, Tilly awoke refreshed and eager to start analyzing the core sample she extracted yesterday. It was now the single remaining piece of the asteroid fragment containing metreon-charged dark matter and might hold answers for building a new navigation system for the spore drive, freeing Commander Stamets from his burden. Busy formulating plans for the work, she dismissed any further concerns about seeing May. Sometimes it felt real, sometimes it felt like a vision, but, she reasoned, it was her own subconscious comforting her after the injury and helping her think through a thorny problem. Like her childhood imaginary friend’s support when she was lonely.

Now that she felt better and Michael was back onboard, there was no need for further conversations with herself via May. Freshly showered and dressed she left for breakfast and to catchup with her friends.

After a short, troubling sleep, Pike awoke in pain. Any movement sent waves of agony through his right side. In addition to the shattered ribs, that side was covered with fourth- and third-degree burns and though the skin was starting to regenerate it was intensively sensitive to even the lightest of touches. His uniform crew shirt and jacket felt like a vise screwed too tight. Dr. Pollard avoided dispensing any self-administered pain medication forcing a check-in when he required a new dose. She must have taken a correspondence course from Dr. Boyce on treatment techniques for senior officers, he grumbled as he left for Sickbay.

ooooo

The mess hall was buzzing with conversations recounting yesterday’s events on New Eden. By the time Tilly sat at a table with Joann Owo and Gen Rhys, she had picked out “Captain”, “phaser” and “gravely injured.” Her good mood vanished. She liked their new Captain, a lot. Maybe too much, she admitted to herself reluctantly. “Wait,” she interrupted their conversation, “is he going to be OK? I mean he must be OK, we can’t lose another commander, can we? Maybe we are cursed. But we are lucky to have the chance to serve under Captain Pike, I mean …”

Owo put up her hand to stop the verbal barrage. “According to Bryce, Saru told the bridge officers that Captain Pike will recover.”

Rhys blushed slightly, “Nurse O’Malley told me the same thing last night.”

Owo grinned, “A subject we are returning to soon,” and adding for Tilly’s benefit, “he finally found his courage and asked O’Malley out.” But Tilly couldn’t focus on anything other than their interim commander.

Rhys ignored the remark. “Joann was filling me in.”

“The important bit is Captain Pike grabbed an overloading phaser from a young girl and fell on it to contain the blast. Literally with his own body. He saved everyone in the room … me, Michael, their priestess, the girl and her father.”

Discovery’s tactical officer added with a look of awe, “Rumor is he regained consciousness as you were taking him to the church for beam out and tried to walk on his own part of the way.”

“Didn’t Michael tell you?” Owo asked Tilly.

“No …” Tilly answered absentmindedly. Rhys snapped his fingers to get her attention, “How are you after the accident yesterday? Did you get into trouble?”

“Lecture from Saru, not bad. He understands I did it to help Commander Stamets. I’m late.” Tilly left quickly, anxious to get to the quiet privacy of the lab and sort through the worry and other thoughts running through her head.

“That’s the fewest number of words I have ever heard from her,” Owo said to Rhys as Tilly left. “Now back to your date.”

ooooo

Saru tracked Tilly down in the lab. He had hoped the reprimand he delivered regarding the incident in the shuttle bay was sufficient to end the matter. He was trying to act as a buffer between this crew he loved as his family and their new Captain until they learned more about how Pike expected the ship to run and how he reacted to problems. It was a skill Saru perfected while serving under Lorca attempting to protect the crew from the mirror universe captain’s more egregious demands and punishments.

But while emphasizing he agreed with Saru’s handling of the incident, after reviewing the Ensign’s service file Pike decided to speak to Tilly personally. Rather than issue an unnerving and possibly embarrassing ship-wide call for Tilly to report to the Captain, Saru delivered the summons in person and face-to-face.

Tilly counted to thirty to keep herself from rushing in after the chime announced her presence outside the ready room. She felt like she had been summoned to the principal’s office which had never, ever happened to her. Once the Captain responded “Come” she entered the room just enough for the doors to close and tried not to fidget while standing at attention. Thank God I put my hair up this morning, or I might be twirling it around my finger right now, she thought.

Pike moved gingerly from the chair to stand in front of his desk and said, “At ease Ensign.”

He didn’t invite her to sit down. That can’t be a good, she thought. Staying at attention, she avoided looking directly at him.

Pike leaned against the desk assuring himself that only was to help her settle and not to ease the ache in his side. When there was no change in her posture, he said quietly. “Ensign your conduct yesterday was worrying. Especially for a member of the Command Training Program. I am disappointed.”

No, No, this is worse than I imagined, she thought. I could cope if he yelled, but disappointment? I can’t believe I disappointed Pike of all the possible captains. My mother is right, I will never get my own ship. Will I be allowed to stay on Discovery? He could transfer me and ensure I never serve on any starship. Right now, it was taking all her determination to keep the tears from flowing. Not knowing what to say she simply nodded her head and looked down at the floor.

“Ensign, look at me. It is important you acknowledge your actions were ill-considered.”

She started to explain why getting the sample was so important. Then looking up and examining his stern expression the constant river of thoughts flowing through her mind abruptly halted. She nodded again.

“Please list the errors you made.”

“I … didn’t … inform anyone of my plan … not even my direct superior,” she answered haltingly.

“Did you have a plan?”

She shook her head. If I am honest with myself, it was more of a whim with a couple of precautions rather than a plan.

“Continue.”

“I didn’t follow hazard protocol in the shuttle bay.”

Pike noticed Tilly’s shoulders relaxing slightly as she began to understand her hurry to explore a worthy idea and her disregard of proper procedure was the problem. Good, he thought, that’s progress.

And then the real Tilly came rushing back. “I didn’t ask for the shuttle bay to be cleared as a precaution. I didn’t review the container specifications with engineering to ensure it would hold the sample. I didn’t have my calculations for the extraction laser duration and frequency double checked. I didn’t ask a partner to work with me as required when performing an action deemed risky or unsafe. I didn’t inform Sickbay or Security I was going to work with potentially dangerous material and get their clearance. I didn’t ask anyone for permission. I put myself, the rest of the crew, and the ship at risk. I …”

Pike held up his hand to stop the rushed explanation now that she recognized her actions endangered everyone. He motioned for her to sit and returned to the chair behind the desk. “It’s important to learn when and how to break the rules. It must never happen as an impulse. I trust this mistake will not be repeated?” He smiled and she nodded. He continued before she began a 10-minute exposition. “Good. This is serious and merits discipline, here is what I have in mind…”

Later, Saru found Tilly in the mess hall eagerly working at a table littered with five PADDS and three drained expresso cups. She beamed when he walked over and sat down beside her. “I trust your conversation with Captain Pike was not too difficult?” He asked.

“I was terrified at first. And you were right, I didn’t lose my place in the Command Training Program.” She held up a PADD. “I’ve been assigned extra work.” Her big smile returned, and she continued, “By the end of the week I am required to submit a plan to you, approved by all the relevant department heads, for analyzing the core sample and, if it proves suitable, a project plan for the command trainees to design and build a prototype for a new navigation interface based on the dark matter sample.”

She finished, “Best freakin’ amazing punishment ever.”

ooooo

Saru had been dancing around the subject for most of the day. He finally seized a moment after Dr. Pollard’s finished her crew evaluation report. It was the most assertive conversation from Saru so far. Pike was pleased to see Saru’s self-confidence increasing as he braved speaking truth to his new commander. Or in this case, scolding his Captain for getting injured. An effective scolding, Pike admitted.

He suspected communication logs would show Saru had put in a call to Enterprise last night for a ‘Tips and Techniques for Managing Your Captain’ chat between first officers. One that Una would have been all too happy to have and probably invite Dr. Boyce to join. Pike shook his head ruefully and called for Michael to come to the ready room.

Chapter Text

He had received varied accolades during his Starfleet career. One was unanimous – ‘Cadet (Ensign, Lieutenant, Commander) Saru is exceptionally well-prepared.’ For him this was the highest praise given. Part of this is nurture, Kelpiens manage fear through planning, groundwork, and ritual. Part of this is nature, a thirst for knowledge, devotion to science and a desire to be the best representative of his species in Starfleet. His mother’s favorite adages had been, ‘Talent and intelligence are gifts only opened through hard work’ and ‘Capability depends on a foundation built with preparation.’ These drove his internal compass.

For the first time in months, Saru had the luxury of meticulous preparation. Scheduled to leave Earth’s orbit soon, Discovery would travel to Vulcan and receive their next commanding officer - Captain Selyk. The trip took four days and every minute would be used to double and triple-check each detail for welcoming the Captain and resuming normal operations. This change of command coincided with resuming Discovery’s original mission of scientific exploration. The ship could support over 300 different scientific assignments and was expected to reach full capacity within six months. Captain Selyk was a noted scientist in his own right, as well as a distinguished officer with over half a century of command experience, and, in Saru’s opinion, a perfect match to Discovery.

For some onboard Discovery, this was their third Captain in three years. After enduring a mutiny, the death of Captain Georgiou, war, Lorca’s betrayal and the Terran universe; Saru believed Selyk would foster a calm, professional, rational atmosphere on the ship. And that would be a balm for him and the crew. To prepare, Saru had read the ship’s logs from Selyk’s former commands, the Vulcan’s scientific papers and his other writings. While waiting for Ensign Roberts to join him in the ready room, he reviewed the logs yet again. Ten minutes late, the door chimed. “Enter” he responded.

Once the young man was standing in front of him, Saru frowned slightly and continued, “Ensign Roberts punctuality is expected on this ship and will be of the upmost importance in your role as Yeoman for Captain Selyk.”

Roberts, one of nine cadets joining the crew as part of the command training program group onboard - the tenth member was their own Sylvia Tilly - squirmed and replied, “My apologies sir, I got lost.”

“May I suggest you immediately memorize the ship’s layout as it is crucial for your new assignment. And I reiterate … you can never be too prepared. Have you contacted the Captain’s former yeomen? Their knowledge will help you get Captain Selyk’s quarters and ready room set-up, as well as ensure his preferences are known to Ships’ Services.”

“Yes sir, I mean, I am doing that now, sir,” the nervous ensign replied.

Saru softened his expression. “At ease. I have never served under a Vulcan commander either, so together we will decide how to meet his expectations and prepare. Although he started with the Vulcan Expeditionary Force, Captain Selyk transferred to Starfleet thirty years ago and has led two mixed species crews. So be assured he understands working with us.”

Roberts nodded and Saru continued, “I am speaking with his former first officers. Shall we finish our research and then meet again at 0800?” Roberts agreed and Saru dismissed him. Initially he had planned to assign the Yeoman’s position to Ensign Tilly due to her conscientiousness and detailed knowledge of Discovery. However, further consideration changed his mind as her chattiness, while endearing, might not be the best fit with this particular commander.

Saru was especially pleased to direct a command training program group. Admiral Cornwall made the appointment herself, in person. The chance to teach the next generation of leaders was as important to him as his own command. In support of both aspirations, he was studying the records and styles of the most respected leaders in the fleet. He recently completed the journals of Admiral Archer and Commodore April and would soon begin analyzing Captain Pike. This was a poor substitute for the lost chance of serving as Georgiou’s first officer, but an opportunity such as that was not likely to be repeated.

In their meeting Admiral Cornwell had also promised, “Commander Saru your leadership and level-headedness in the Terran universe is noted. While Captain Selyk will assume command of Discovery next, he plans to retire when the time is appropriate, when you are ready. Then Discovery will be yours…”

“Ambassador Sarek requests permission to come on board sir,” Bryce called from the bridge interrupting his reflections.

“Permission granted. Please inform the crew we will be leaving shortly.” Saru left to greet the Ambassador, knowing he was ready for the next step along his journey.

Chapter Text

Scientists, theologians, and politicians would be debating for decades the reason ‘Control got Out-of-Control’ (a phrase coined by the Mayan ambassador that, unfortunately, stuck.). A higher power at work? Destiny? An unsupervised Section 31, led by the obsessed and paranoid, developing increasingly sophisticated artificial intelligence applications?

Or dangers that may be inherent in time travel itself? While there were many assumptions and guesses regarding the capability and effects of time travel, few qualified as theories and none were tested via practical experimentation. Except for the Section 31 project code-named Daedalus, though now only five people remained with the clearance to view that data.

Was the timeline linear? Unalterable? Did each decision spawn a discrete set of possible timelines? Was time a loop? Multiple loops? Or a jumble of events that sometimes touched and interacted with one another?

Did a desperate mother’s impulsive time jump to save her family alter Control’s trajectory? Did each of that same woman’s jumps through time battling Control instead increase its abilities exponentially? Did analysis of the red bursts by Section 31’s threat assessment program set in motion the catastrophe? Can the effect trigger the cause?

Or is time itself sentient? Manipulating events in what appears to be coincidence? Perhaps cruel, perhaps benign, but always with an agenda of its own?

ooooo

One Year Ago

Simultaneously, seven federation sensors spread over a vast distance came online and called home. The watch commander on duty in Starfleet Command’s Operations Center compared the reports, paled and called his commanding officer. The comms specialist who had received the reports, an agent (secret) for Section 31, called her handler.

One Hour Later

“How bad can it be?” Number One said aloud to herself as the turbolift climbed to the bridge. “They said please.” Delta shift was at its midpoint when the call came for her to please come and advise. Arriving at the bridge, she put on her most stern expression as a reminder high-ranking officers were not called out at 3:00am for trivial problems. Curiously most of the junior bridge crew were huddled around the communication station, engaged in vigorous discussion. “Report,” she ordered. It was bad.

Captain Leland was conferring with Patar when an aide rushed into the Admiral’s office and whispered in her ear. Patar nodded, dismissed the aide, returned her attention to Leland and ordered, “Report to Section 31 headquarters, best speed plus. You have a new mission.”

ooooo

Though it seems an oxymoron, Dr. Gabrielle Burnham had learned through trial and error when you initiated a jump into the past mattered. Pick the wrong moment and the eddies of the timestream remain undisturbed and nothing is altered.

Her next plan was a Hail Mary, but after hundreds of attempts and failures to neutralize Control, it remained her only option. Her previous attempt – revealing the outcome of the current timeline to Spock, who as a child understood her words when his sister was in danger – seemed promising but those hopes faded when Spock committed himself to a mental health facility. Unsure if his illness was an unrelated happenstance or stemmed from the side effects of atemporal dysplasia which had been an unsurmountable obstacle when communicating directly with anyone in the past, she decided to risk this unusual and potentially dangerous approach.

The jump had to be initiated soon and final preparations remained.

ooooo

Number One reread the message in case she was mistaken. ‘… Chris, drinks on you when you arrive as you lost the bet … signed WJ Abbott.’ As she was reading the lieutenant with conn duty this shift continued explaining, “Sir, the message doesn’t appear urgent but it’s from a four star admiral. We were unsure if it could wait until morning or should be sent to the Captain immediately. Nicola and then Mann were called but neither have checked in yet.”

Nicola, the chief communications officer, and Mann, the senior operations officer, arrived in the next turbolift and exchanged sheepish looks. Enterprise was on its way home following the cease-fire with the Klingon Empire carrying a Captain and crew exasperated with being ordered to wait out the conflict in a rarely traveled sector of space beyond the edge of the Federation. The crew spent the wait mapping that little-known sector and fine-tuning the ship’s systems. The department heads spent the wait managing the crew’s morale and voicing to their superior officers strong objections regarding the illogic of keeping Enterprise out of the fight. Nicola and Mann had discussed a few theories of their own regarding the real reason Enterprise was ordered to stay away and none involved the time and distance required for warping home. The ship’s return trip had been long and uneventful, allowing the crew time to indulge in personal activities.

Number One threw them an ‘I’ll deal with you later’ look as they took their stations, pleased she won the pool betting when the two lieutenants would acknowledge their mutual attraction. “Everyone back to your stations,” Una ordered and then continued, “Full stop. Call the Captain to the bridge. Someone wake up Connelly, I want him manning the science station before the Captain arrives. Comm, setup a secure channel to Command and prepare for a second encrypted message. Nicola, you need to review clear text emergency message protocols with your staff.”

Amid the chorus of “Aye sirs,” the junior comms office whispered to Nicola, “What did I miss?”

“It’s a heads-up message for a potentially serious or dangerous situation. The message body is irrelevant; the clue is the sender, a high-ranking admiral who, though he or she doesn’t exist, will have a full bio record in our databases.”

ooooo

Leland accepted the universe is brutal. This supported his justification of tactics that many viewed as over the line, and his assumption that the unknown invariably turns out to be dangerous, riddled with perils only his organization can neutralize. Section 31 existed to defeat chaos, a mission to which he devoted his life. Yes, Section 31 was powerful, but it had to be, it wielded that power for the greater good.

Tuning out the rehash of the limited information available regarding the red bursts, Leland ticked through possibilities. Perhaps they were synchronization signals for a vast force preparing to invade? Super-novae weaponized? Intentional tears in the fabric of space-time? Mass extinction events speeding toward the Federation?

He tuned into the conversation once Patar began speaking, “… a task force is being assembled; Johnson ensure our assets, the Xryllian ambassador and the astrophysics dean of the Vulcan Science Academy, are assigned. Do we have any agents on Enterprise?”

“No,” Johnson confirmed.

She continued, “Leland, the Enterprise has been assigned to investigate. Find it, shadow it, and report everything they learn. You are authorized to intervene when you deem necessary. Your history with Captain Pike will be an asset.”

Leland nodded and left to ready his ship for departure. He agreed this was not a situation to leave in the hands of a man who would invariably err on the side of ideals rather than practicalities.

ooooo

Everything was ready. The jump window opened in 30 minutes. Dr. Gabrielle Burnham activated her time travel suit and readied the transmission. If she couldn’t communicate directly with anyone in the past, perhaps she could plant a message in the ship’s communication system with her instructions for defeating control.

Her recent and failed dialogue with Spock had had two objectives. First, disseminate her knowledge about Control. Second, urge Spock to brief Captain Pike, who she judged had the openness to listen and the clout necessary for forcing change in Section 31 and to Control.

There was about to be a solar flare near the Enterprise’s trajectory. It would conceal her from the ship’s sensors while she transmitted the virus.

ooooo

Pike emerged from his ready room and the latest conference with Command. He muttered, “Damn holograms,” before asking, “any change?”

“One of the phenomena may be stabilizing,” Connelly answered.

Amin added, “Trying to get a navigation fix now.”

Pike nodded his acknowledgement and motioned for Number One to join him at the empty engineering station. Softly he told her, “Command remains divided as to whether the bursts are malevolent or benign. Thoughts?”

“I find it premature to assign motive with so little data.”

Before he could respond Amin said, “We have it sir.”

“Very well. Set course, Warp 5. Head out when ready. Nicola, inform Command,” he ordered. Then to Una he said, “Stay here and continue coordinating the analysis. Go to Yellow Alert when we’re thirty minutes from dropping out of warp.” She nodded and returned to her station.

With the virus successfully implanted in the Enterprise’s comm system, the anchor pulled Dr. Burnham back to Terralysium.

Designs that appeal to theoretical engineers sometimes clash with the realities of solo missions in deep space where assistance can be months away. Once on board, a ship’s chief engineer often ‘enhanced’ the equipment and its programming. One of those enhancements, in this case automatically isolating life support systems based on specific event triggers, saved the Enterprise crew. As Dr. Burnham’s virus moved through the comm system’s code, it hit an undetected bug in a little used subroutine of the new holographic application. The bug rewrote the virus rendering it more virulent and then started replicating it across all primary systems.

The computer sounded red alert and shields raised automatically. Navigation went down first. Then helm, science, impulse and warp engines. Circuits overloaded all over the ship. Lights failed. Gravity generators switched to backup systems. The Captain raced onto the bridge as Number One ordered a link established with command, Mercury protocol.

Damage reports flooded in. Pike held up his hand to stop the status details, “Make a list of what’s still working, issue a priority one distress call and encrypt it,” he ordered. Turning to Nicola he asked, “Can you route the comms channel you established to my ready room?” Nicola nodded. “Do it. Get Admiral Cornwell.” As Pike went to his ready room the announcements continued, “Comms to Engineering just went down … Send a runner to get a status, send one to Medical too … Fire on deck 7, section A force fields are holding … Thrusters out, starboard side.”

“This investigation is too important to leave entirely to another ship,” Kat Cornwell shot back as their argument continued, “if it’s a military threat we need an experienced solider, if it’s a first contact we need an experienced diplomat.”

“But my crew,” Pike began again.

“Will be in the excellent care of Commander Una. And you know that,” Cornwell finished.

Pike conceded the point.

“Discovery will be in range of your distress call soon. Take command under Regulation 19, section C. The spore drive may prove to be an asset if this is a threat.” The link failed just as the briefing materials for Discovery arrived.

Pike informed Number One in private. They spent time planning emergency contingencies. Then he informed the bridge officers.

“Captain, we are receiving a message in Morse Code from the USS Discovery.”

Chapter Text

She had been aboard Discovery for 24 hours and already indulged in three showers (limited resources had to be strictly rationed on the damaged Hiawatha) and breakfast, second breakfast, lunch, a mid-afternoon snack, a proper British tea, and an epic dinner (the ready-to-eat meals Starfleet provided, her only means of subsistence for over 10 months, really did have the taste and texture of sawdust, very bland sawdust). The patients from the medical ship were now stable and ably cared for by the Discovery medical staff.

Fully rested, sated and no longer solely responsible for the care of her injured crew, Jett Reno found herself at loose ends. There had not been a second to spare for so many months and she had been so, so weary. During particularly low moments, times when wondering if the Federation lost the war, if rescue would ever come or when contemplating her unexpected widowhood, she kept her spirits up imagining an uninterrupted night’s sleep, long hot showers, elaborate menus, and vacations. Check, check, check, and well, she never liked time off much anyway.

As difficult as the past months had been, her talents and creativity were stretched in unimaginable ways – building sophisticated machines from scavenged equipment as well as learning the basics of a completely different profession. This she would miss.

The door chime interrupted her thoughts and she responded, “Come.”

“I am checking-in to make sure you have everything you need,” Captain Pike said as he entered her quarters and placed the white bag he carried on a table. She motioned an invitation for him to sit.

“I never thought I would look forward to hanging out in a crowded mess hall but there I was most of last night and this morning meeting half the crew. You really should program the replicators to produce a decent pasta sauce,” Reno answered then added, “and edible waffles.”

Pike shook his head slightly and chuckled, “I’ll pass that along.”

“So yes sir, I do, have everything I need that is. Commander Saru has been especially attentive.” Reno was a bit surprised when Pike contacted her earlier asking to drop by her quarters in an hour. The notice gave her time to straighten up. After only a day, the room was already cluttered in her normal way.

Pike looked around and said, “I can’t remember the last time I was in a crewman’s quarters that looked lived in rather than ready for inspection.”

“Ah, the trials of captainhood,” she answered theatrically, face serious and hands clasped in front of her chest. Then she continued in a normal tone, “What did you expect?”

“I read you as more irreverent.”

“I’ll work hard not to disprove your instincts,” Reno deadpanned.

“I have no doubts about that Commander.” Pike smiled and continued, “This might seem too soon, but would you consider…”

Reno interrupted, “Just so you know, I’m impervious to the dimples.” Pike burst into laughter and shot her a ‘didn’t you forget something’ expression. Reno leisurely added, “Sir.”

“On second thought, you may fit into the Enterprise crew a little too well,” he commented. “You are entitled to leave, a long leave. But would you consider an immediate assignment to Discovery for the duration of my mission? Either way, there will be a position waiting for you on Enterprise, or I will arrange whatever posting you desire.”

Reno started to accept immediately realizing she didn’t want to face unstructured time nor face being alone. But Pike added, “We’re two days from space dock, take that time to think it through. You’ve been through hell this past year and I want you to find the right next place.”

“Why me, I mean on Discovery?”

“You’re a brilliant engineer and I need to augment this talented but relatively inexperienced crew with senior officers.” His blue eyes were filled with amusement. “You’d be a role model.”

“So, the kids need my adult supervision? Heaven help them then. And you too. By the way, when did Starfleet start asking what assignments we are willing to take?”

Pike chuckled, “I find it works out better when you think it’s your choice.” Reno shook her head and snorted.

He picked up the bag from the table and stood. “I am sorry it has taken so long to return this to you, we were in deep space before realizing it was left behind.” Then in flawless Soyousian, he recited the ritual phrases, handed her the bag, bowed slightly according to the expected custom, and left.

Completely taken aback, Reno stared at the bag for a few minutes. A simple white linen bag embroidered with gold, silver, and bronze thread. She opened it and removed an ebon wooden box, studded with bits and pieces of the Soyousian equivalent of mother of pearl. Resembling a night sky, it was simultaneously simple and elegant, somber and joyous. Her breath hitched and tears pooled in her eyes.

Reno’s wife, Nisha, had been certain this was lost on her trip home from a rotation on the Enterprise and never expected it to be found much less restored to her. Her Aur’iar. The closest translation was ‘gentle music box’ but it was so much more than that. Not simply a place to store beloved trinkets, but also a spiritual reflection of its owner. The box was gifted to a young girl from her foremother and was a Soyousian’s most treasured possession.

If lost, it was the responsibility of the leader of the clan finding it to personally safeguard and return it. Even if it took generations. The Enterprise crew had recognized and honored the tradition. Honored Nisha by returning the Aur’iar according to the requisite protocol.

She still faced the daunting task of finding out which friends survived the war, and which did not. The daunting task of adjusting to life without Nisha. The Discovery now, and Enterprise later, could be good places to start anew. Yes, she would accept the Captain’s offer. At the very least, she could teach the kids in engineering to build and run a proper still.

Chapter Text

“Number One, it’s a Federation ship, a sister ship, I don’t need a security officer with me,” Christopher Pike countered. He resumed reviewing the Discovery crew manifest.

With the Captain’s attention focused elsewhere, Una narrowed her eyes and frowned at him as she considered her next tactic. “Sir, it’s my responsibility to see to your …”

“safety.” Pike finished the often-repeated sentiment. He chuckled and shook his head. “As you remind me almost daily. I don’t think I have any enemies in the scientific community, so I should be reasonably safe. You know, law of averages and all that.”

The first officer’s snort clearly expressed her opinion of his last statement. To emphasize her point she added sarcastically, “Because you know how often the law of averages break in our favor.”

Pike glanced up from his PADD and caught the pleading look in Una’s eyes, one of the non-verbal signals they developed over the years for communicating quickly without alarming the crew. This was a request for a private conversation. He nodded to her. “Connolly, meet me in the main transporter room in 20 minutes and be ready to brief the Discovery crew; Nicola, inform Commander Saru we will beam over then.” He paused reaching for something fitting to say before leaving. “I …”

By then the entire bridge crew were on their feet, facing him and standing at attention. The navigator, Amim, spoke for the group, “Enterprise will be ready for you when you return home sir.” After making eye contact with each one individually, Pike nodded and headed for the turbolift. “Number One, walk with me.” Once inside he gave the instruction to hold and shunted the lift out of service. “You’ve got 10 minutes to convince me. Go”

“You are heading into a potentially hazardous situation with an unknown and somewhat inexperienced crew. We don’t know what damaged Enterprise. I submit it is wise to augment the Discovery bridge with another senior officer,” Number One presented in her usual point-by-point style.

“Continue.”

“You need another veteran pair of eyes and ears, an officer who knows you and who will implement your orders immediately with minimal instruction. Without questions.” Her emphasis on that word did not go unnoticed.

Pike looked thoughtful.

Una controlled her desire to smile since that expression was often a sign he had changed his mind or at least he was reconsidering. Then he tilted his head slightly and leaned against the wall. Or not, she thought as this was an indication he was settling in for a verbal sparring match.

“Logical,” he conceded.

Una bowed her head slightly. “Thank you.”

“Yet … there is a flaw in your reasoning.”

She raised an eyebrow. The resemblance to Spock was uncanny. Damn, she thought, he’s right. “Please clarify,” she shot back, ready to catch him in a mistake.

“An operations officer or an engineer would be a better fit than a security officer.”

Bingo! “Captain, a security officer brings tactical proficiency, a skill that may not be prevalent on a science ship.”

Although it would be invigorating, and admittedly, fun, to ask if Una is questioning the proficiency of my tactical skills to which she will respond that she won’t be there to catch my mistakes, Pike thought, time is short. He straightened. “I’m not convinced. An unexpected change of command is difficult enough for a crew and will be more so under these circumstances. Being accompanied by Enterprise security adds unneeded tension.” He started to put the lift back into service but hesitated after noting her troubled expression and tense posture. “Una, you are more concerned than seems warranted. And you’re not given to paranoia, but this feels like that.” He gave her a sympathetic look and continued, “Speak freely. Tell me what I am missing.”

“Connolly is a capable officer, but he will be busy coordinating data about the signals. You also need someone on that bridge who is extraordinarily observant. Someone like Spock …” She stopped abruptly, wanting to take back her last sentence. Wanting to take back the sorrow she had unintentionally caused.

Pike’s breath hitched and she caught a pained expression before he quickly masked it. Una knew the Captain had not forgiven himself for missing any early signs of Spock’s illness. That he felt he was partially to blame for its severity and that he personally bore the responsibility of his officer’s treatment and recovery. It was horrifying for them to contemplate Spock might never regain his sanity. “You’re still dancing around the point, get to it,” Pike ordered curtly.

She sighed. “Spock and I once spoke about his sister’s mutiny aboard the Shenzhou.” Pausing, she thought to herself, To be precise it was more of a rant after he became intoxicated from one too many Mexican hot chocolates with extra cinnamon and whipped cream but there is no need to bother the Captain with that much detail, and how was I to know chocolate, cinnamon, and sugar had that effect on Vulcans?

Una then continued, “Commander Burnham’s insubordinate actions didn’t surprise him. And he believed she could, and probably would, repeat the behavior. Do you expect me to send you into that situation without adequate backup from Enterprise?”

Pike used to think starship captains enjoyed ultimate freedom, especially those commanding deep space missions. Then he became one. Though to be fair, he spent much of his time as Captain April’s first officer suggesting more security or that the Captain stay onboard and let Pike handle the mission. If he were part of this conversation, Robert April would roar with laughter citing ‘karmic retribution’ in his well-known booming voice. Pike put the lift back into service and then softening his tone responded, “I do understand. And I respect your concerns which I do not take lightly. But an overt security presence sends the wrong message. The answer is still no.” He then flashed her a sheepish grin and added, “Though I will endeavor to stay out of trouble.”

Number One rolled her eyes. “You always try. Very well sir. I would say thank you for listening but then you might think I agree with your decision.”

The turbolift doors opened and before exiting Pike called back over his shoulder, “Discovery could use an additional general engineer, will you arrange that? Anyone but Montgomery Scott. He’s a wizard with repairs so Enterprise needs him. And I don’t want to deal with the aftereffects of Discovery’s crew learning to build a still after what happened when he started one here. Yes, I do know about that little incident.”

Number One waited for the doors to close before calling Engineering. The Captain’s request sparked an idea.

Pike and Connolly were waiting in the transporter room when Number One walked in with Commander Nhan. “Captain, as requested,” Number One gestured with her arm, “a general engineer to accompany you to Discovery.” The faintest of smiles crossed her face for a nanosecond.

Pike pretended not to notice her smile, granting her the victory. It was, in fact, a clever and elegant solution, one worthy of his first officer.

Commander Nhan began her career as an engineer. She was fascinated by weapons systems and battle tactics and soon discovered her true calling – security. But that switch in specialties typically required two years of training at headquarters. Finally accepting an interruption in her career was unavoidable, Nhan had decided to take the course when she was offered an engineering assignment on a deep space mission. It was too good an opportunity to pass up as open positions on the Enterprise serving under Captain Pike were rare and highly competitive.

After three fulfilling years rising through the ranks in engineering and spending every spare moment studying security protocols and various fighting disciplines, she summoned the courage to ask for a department transfer. She was surprised when Enterprise’s security chief offered to mentor her personally and Captain Pike was open to the idea. Well, more than open, since his exact words were, “What took you so long?” Her transfer was granted that afternoon for a twelve-month probationary period and ended with a grueling exam. That was 18 months ago, and she never regretted it.

Pike remember though Nhan transferred to security over a year ago, he had never updated the designation in her personnel record from ‘Engineer, general’. Well played Number One you outmaneuvered me brilliantly, Pike thought. Till next time.

Chapter Text

“Commander Saru Personal Log Stardate 1025.19. We are in route to Vulcan and should arrive in three days, there Captain Selyk will assume command of Discovery. I sense there are members of the crew, especially bridge officers who believe I am disappointed not to be appointed this ship’s captain and are frustrated at the Admiralty on my behalf. I have noticed their hastily covered sympathy. But they are wrong. I do believe I led this crew well after Lorca’s departure. Yet it does not diminish my accomplishments to recognize I have more to learn before I will be the Captain I aspire to be. Pause recording,” Saru said as he began to pace his quarters.

He awoke this morning feeling disheartened and these low spirits continued. This mood needed to be resolved quickly so he could focus on the ongoing preparations for their new Captain’s arrival. Thus, the indulgence of a mid-day visit to his quarters and its lush garden. A garden he had cultivated over many years and transplanted to Discovery, with specimens from his home world as well as plants like those on his home world. Almost every surface, including the walls and ceiling, held vivid green ferns and ivies, bonsai trees, and red, yellow, and white flowering plants.

“Continue recording. My hesitation to intervene during Michael’s mutiny on the Shenzhou despite my concerns about her behavior shows I have more to learn about trusting my instincts. The loss of Captain Georgiou on my watch led to my protectiveness of Lorca, overlooking his inappropriate decisions and actions, showing I have more to learn about leadership. Rather than challenge my Captain I focused on protecting the crew from his wrath and manipulation. Instead, I should have tried to prevent it. Pause recording.”

He pruned one of the potted trees and lightly brushed his fingertips over its velvety leaves. “Continue recording. Am I being too critical of myself? No, I do not believe I am. I learned from my time on the Shenzhou that talent and training are a beginning but not a substitute for the experience, maturity, and wisdom necessary to work without a net. Captain Selyk is a respected commander and I have no doubt he will teach me a great deal. End recording.”

This garden usually offered serenity but not today. There would be no peace of mind until he was honest with himself about the thoughts and feelings engendered by Michael Burnham’s pardon. He supported commuting her life imprisonment sentence. And her return to Starfleet rather than waste her talents. But at her full former rank? Were her actions during the war enough to negate any repercussions from an act as egregious as mutiny?

Yet if he was truly honest with himself, these were questions, not grievances. She had earned a second chance – with caution but not prejudice. No, his frustration was personal. Shared experiences during the Klingon war, serving under Captain Lorca and especially the trip to the mirror universe healed their rocky relationship and seeded a friendship. One in the early stages to be sure, but a comfortable level of respect and trust was now present. He admired Michael’s bravery and self-assurance. Her survival of tragedy and loss.

But somedays an event or comment would remind him of their competitiveness on the Shenzhou. Of her dismissiveness of his advice. Of her mockery of his timidity. Michael had been one of the youngest first officers in the fleet. After receiving her assignment on the Shenzhou due to a personal connection between Ambassador Sarek and Captain Georgiou, Michael had then earned her position through hard work. But her self-confidence could border on arrogance, believing she represented the best of both approaches – instinct and logic – and that her advice should be taken because it was given by her.

Which circled back to a resentment that periodically surfaced. She had the chance to serve as first officer beside one of the most decorated and respected captains in the fleet, more importantly to learn everything Captain Georgiou had to teach. She threw that away in a moment of, of what? Self-righteousness? Fear? Impulse? And robbed him of the same chance. There were many fine captains in the fleet, they earned and deserved respect. And then there were the luminaries – April, Georgiou, Pike, T’Rel. His chance to learn directly from one of them was now gone forever and studying their missions was a poor substitute.

These feelings conceded and accepted, he could now get back to work preparing the ship and crew for their new mission. After saying the Kelpien prayer resigning himself to his fate and releasing any lingering bitterness, Saru left his quarters and returned to the bridge.

ooooo

“Transmission coming through. Captain Christopher Pike requests permission to come aboard. He has an engineer and science officer with him,” Bryce reported.

“Permission granted,” Saru responded. “Commander Burnham, you will join me in welcoming them.”

The bridge fell silent for a moment as the possible implications of Enterprise’s distress call sank in. Then multiple conversations began concurrently as the reality of the captain of the flagship boarding Discovery sank in. Michael and Sarek were talking quietly but rapidly to one another.

Saru let the speculation continue and walked over to the communications station. “Mr. Bryce, please inform the crew they may be called to duty presently. They should report to their division duty officers. Have the division heads stand by.”

Bryce nodded an acknowledgement and said, “Enterprise confirms Captain Pike and his officers will beam over in 20 minutes.”

“Alright everyone back to work. This conjecture is pointless and wasteful. Helm, maintain station. Owo, have medical and repair teams ready in case they are needed on Enterprise. Security, start the checklist in case an evacuation is necessary. Bryce, tell the quartermaster to prepare accommodations for our visitors,” Saru ordered and a chorus of “Aye sir” replied. Despite wishing for a retreat to the ready room where he could gather his thoughts in the quiet, Saru remained on the bridge knowing his presence was needed here to temper the excitement and nervousness. Though he was not immune to either.

I am about to meet Captain Pike, Saru thought. He was proud of Discovery’s crew and knew they would make a favorable impression. But how else can we prepare? I am about to meet Captain Pike … in person. Will there be opportunities to talk one on one? Is it appropriate to ask questions about Pike’s missions? How he approaches decisions? Will he be brash? Arrogant? Perhaps he will stay onboard for a few days or even a week, that would be a rare opportunity. On the other hand, it is undoubtedly wearing and annoying when every officer the well-known captain encounters monopolizes his time with endless conversation. Will there be time to meet the first officer of the Enterprise? She has an illustrious reputation as well. Maybe she would be willing to offer pointers on managing captains, among other things. Bryce interrupted Saru’s thoughts, “Sir, ah just a reminder, five minutes to Captain Pike’s arrival.”

Saru nodded and then said, “Thank you.” He straightened his uniform and gestured Michael to the turbolift. “Time to greet our guests.”

Chapter Text

The bridge was quiet after Saru and Michael left for the transporter room and Sarek left for his quarters. Tilly ended the silence a minute later. “How cool would it be to save Enterprise?”

“If the damage is severe what could be important enough for Captain Pike to leave his ship right now?” Rhys mused aloud.

“Maybe we are in trouble?” Tilly added. All eyes turned to her, she shrugged. “You never know.”

“Why bring science and engineering officers?” Airiam asked.

“It’s going to be awesome to actually meet Captain Pike,” Tilly added speaking rapidly as her excitement grew.

Owo, ever the composed presence, said “Its likely something routine. Maybe he is delivering a message and had to come in person once Enterprise’s comms went down. He may not visit the bridge but rather speak directly to Commander Saru or the Ambassador and then immediately beam back to Enterprise.”

“You’re such a buzz kill sometimes,” Tilly retorted. “And like Airiam said, why bring science and engineering officers for that?”

“To explain the technical details?” Owo countered.

“Doesn’t Michael’s foster brother serve on the Enterprise? The ambassador’s son?” Detmer joined the speculation. She frowned and continued, “Maybe there is bad news about him, and Captain Pike wanted to deliver it in person.”

“Poor Michael, that would be too sad after everything she’s been through.” Tilly’s mind was racing. “No wait, I think she said her brother is the science officer on Enterprise, so he must be beaming over as well. So, no bad news. Though there would be more than one science officer…”

Bryce spoke up before Tilly could launch a verbal avalanche. “Commander Saru is right, this speculation is pointless. We will know soon. I heard Captain Pike is strict and demanding.”

“And doesn’t tolerate mistakes,” Detmer added.

“Ok, now you are making me more nervous,” Tilly said.

“We are still speculating, now its rumors rather than why he’s coming on board,” Owo pointed out. “I don’t think that is helpful either. Not if we want to make a good impression.” And then unable to resist adding her own assumption Owo continued, “Besides, why would so many want to serve on Enterprise if he is a difficult commander?”

“Because it’s the freakin’ flagship maybe?” Tilly shot back.

“I met Captain Pike at the Academy. Lieutenant Shranne, an Andorian, said as she entered the main bridge from the rear auxiliary stations, her elegant antennae rapidly swirling, visually communicating her enthusiasm. “He taught an advanced tactics seminar one semester.”

All eyes fixed on her impatiently waiting for the details. Tilly, as usual, spoke for the group. “Well?!”

“I think he was off active duty because of an injury. Anyway, in each class we reviewed a mission and poked holes in the leader’s decisions. Classes were low-key, they felt more like friends talking or rather arguing over beers. He was funny and self-deprecating. You know how boring tactical classes can be. No critiques were off-limits and sometimes the wildest or harshest ones sparked insightful discussions. We didn’t find out until after he left campus all the missions were his.” Her antennae drooped. “I’m sure he doesn’t remember me; he’s probably met hundreds of cadets.”

The turbolift doors opened and Commander Saru, Michael, Linus, Captain Pike and two other officers filed onto the bridge. Everyone stood and came to attention as Tilly said, “Captains on the bridge.”

Saru addressed the crew. “At ease. Captain Pike is assuming command of Discovery while the damage to Enterprise is assessed. He is accompanied by Commander Nhan and Lieutenant Connelly. Ensign Tilly, please execute authentication protocol so the official transfer of command can be completed.”

Once underway to the location of the first signal, Pike asked Saru to join him as he walked to the turbolift. Midstride Pike moved to the left and the small area of auxiliary stations. He said, “Ensign, no sorry, I see its now Lieutenant Shranne, I read your graduate thesis on ‘Techniques for Randomizing Subspace Frequencies During Combat Operations.’ Well done. We incorporated the technique you developed for areas with elevated gravimetrical distortion into Enterprise’s protocols. I’m glad to have you on board Discovery for this mission.” Then Pike and Saru departed.

Once again, all eyes fixed on Shranne. Now her antennae were dancing, and she was blushing – a deep, deep indigo.

ooooo

Michael and Tilly reached the end of their shift and left the bridge. The doors to their quarters had barely closed before Tilly wailed, “I sounded like a sputtering teenager. Not a polished member of the command training program. What must Captain Pike think of me? Oh yeah, that I am a silly girl who was so busy rambling she displayed his personnel file to everyone on the bridge. I’m lucky I didn’t send it to every viewscreen on the ship. And I was practically flirting with him. On the bridge! In front of everyone!”

Michael put a comforting hand on Tilly’s shoulder. “He was smiling and did not appear to be upset, I do not believe you have anything to worry about. I am sure the highly classified information was not in that file.”

“If first impressions are really the lasting ones, I’m sunk. Sorry, I am so self-absorbed I didn’t ask about your brother. Did Captain Pike say why that other guy beamed over instead of Spock?”

“No. He basically told me, politely, not to ask why.”

“Did you talk to the Ambassador about it?”

“I called his quarters, but he is with Captain Pike. Spock and my father haven’t spoken for years. If Sarek knows more than I do, it is information from Captain Pike rather than Spock.”

Tilly flashed that grin that lit her face. “How amazing is it that we get to serve under Captain Pike even if it’s only for a few days?”

“But what about Saru? Did you think he looked upset?” Michael asked frowning.

“I assume he is excited too. It’s not like the ship was taken away from him, we were on our way to pick up a new Captain. This is a chance for him to observe yet another commander in action. I think Saru will welcome the opportunity.”

“Yes, but our expected Captain is low-key and planning to retire after this assignment. It would be more like he and Saru are co-captains. That is not what I want for Saru.”

“Michael, I love you, but I have to say, you tend to assume everyone wants what you want. Maybe you should ask Saru how he feels before getting all riled up.”

“Ok, ok. Message received and point taken. Let’s get something to eat.” There was no need to turn this into an argument with Tilly, though Michael was determined to talk to Pike about it when presented with an opening especially if this temporary command lasted more than a few days.

“Yes, I’m starving.” As they walked out the door and down the hallway Tilly continued, “Captain Pike is shorter than I imagined, but then everyone looks small next to Saru. I think my soldier thing is coming back …”

The hallways and mess hall were more crowded than usual as off-duty crew gathered to discuss the day’s events and their temporary Captain. The story of Pike remembering Shranne from his class had already been repeated throughout the ship and she had retreated to her quarters for a break from the constant questions. The mood ranged from ‘elated’ to ‘so what’ to ‘annoyed’ to ‘paranoid’. The ‘so what’ pointed out it is just another captain who we rarely see or talk with anyway. The ‘annoyed’ opined that Pike is given thorny high-profile missions and we just want to focus on our research. The ‘paranoid’ reminded everyone the last time a new captain was assigned to the ship we ended up in an alternate universe.

Regardless of their opinion everyone was speculating about this unexpected change of command. No one other than Shranne had direct experience interacting with Pike. The next best source was Stamets and the information his colleague shared with him about her experiences on Enterprise. Everything else was rumor and supposition.

Michael and Tilly queued to get their food. While waiting they heard snippets of other conversations. “I heard Captain Pike is a technophobe … I heard everyone assigned to Enterprise must take and pass the intermediate medic course … Rumor is he is involved with this first officer … My cousin whose mother knew a cadet assigned to Pike says he is a workaholic and he expects everyone else to be one too … Rumor is he flew secret missions in his so called ‘test pilot’ days … They say it was more than just flying and he’s been on special missions for Stafleet Intelligence and Section 31 … I heard that if you are going on a deep space mission, he is your best chance to make it home alive … During the Klingon war, they kept the Enterprise away from battle so Captain Pike could come back and lead a resistance if the Federation lost.” Amused they picked up their trays and searched the room for Stamets. Several tables had been pushed together so he could hold court while answering the many queries. Heading in that direction they squeezed in with the crowd.

“Ok people just a reminder, my colleague was posted to Enterprise for only six months. My information is limited.”

“Why did she leave, was she unhappy?”

“No, they were departing for a two-year assignment. She’s Qutar’iani. They return to their home planet once every year for a renewal ritual. It’s a quasi-spiritual requirement, a quasi-psychological need. Despite that she seriously considered staying on board,” Stamets answered and then asked. “Next?”

“Is it true he rarely interacts with the Enterprise crew?”

“I don’t know. But it’s a big ship with a larger crew then Discovery, so I presume Captain Pike doesn’t have time for as much personal contact as we are used to on Discovery.”

“I heard he frowns on personal relationships between crew members.”

“She never mentioned that. Besides, it would be unrealistic on multi-year missions. That rumor was probably started by someone who had a bad breakup, behaved childishly, and their behavior was reprimanded.”

“Is it true the entire crew is required to speak Federation standard when on duty? And all equipment displays in Federation standard?”

“Yes, unless your species is physiologically unable to speak it, then you use the universal translator. My colleague said it’s to ensure no interruption in the event of computer or other equipment failures. And they constantly drill scenarios with their tech off-line.”

“Isn’t that a little paranoid?”

“No,” answered Connelly as he walked into the mess hall with Nhan. “Hard lessons taught us technology can and will be unpredictably disabled. We learned to survive without it. Yes, to the question about medic training. Captain Pike likes to have contingency plans for contingency plans. Some think he is obsessive, but really he’s careful … there is no one to rescue you in deep space.”

Nhan chimed in. “And no to the rumors of a guy or girl in every port. You’d be confusing him with that junior lieutenant … what’s his name?”

“Kirk,” answered Connelly.

Stamets spoke up, “OK people, that enough for today.” When everyone stayed put, he waved his arms and added, “Go. Find something more productive to do than gossip.” As his audience slowly began to file out of the room, he stood. “Ladies and Lieutenant, I am going to call it a night as well.”

Michael smiled at the Enterprise officers and motioned for them to join her and Tilly. “Sorry for the numerous questions.”

Tilly nodded her agreement. “It’s not every day a captain like Pike takes over a science ship. We’re a little in awe.”

Nhan chuckled. “We’re used to it. In port someone is always asking for an anecdote about Enterprise or her Captain.”

“I’ll get dinner,” Connelly said to Nhan.

“Thanks. Salad please.”

The four ate silently. Then Michael observed, “Throw out all the rumors, innuendos and speculation; there is one constant left. Captain Pike is respected.”

Connelly replied, “Every member of his crew would fight through hell if he asked them to. Without hesitation and without question.” Nhan nodded.

“You didn’t respond to the involved with his first officer rumor,” Tilly prompted.

Nhan handled this one. “Don’t take our silence as confirmation. There is an unspoken rule on Enterprise, we never, ever discuss the crews’ private lives with anyone off ship. Especially the Captain’s. We’re a bit proprietary and protective of him.”

Tilly felt disappointed. But decided she would analyze that later.

“May I ask one more question?” This was from Michael. After both Nhan and Connelly nodded she continued, “What best describes Captain Pike?

Both Michael and Tilly were surprised at the immediacy of the answer. Nhan started. “He’s innately kind and preternaturally calm. And will allow you a great deal of leeway.”

Connelly said, “He ignores drama, such as another commander’s arrogance or attempt to dominate a situation as long as his crew, other members of the fleet, and civilians are safe.”

Nhan finished, “He’s all those things until the situation requires him to be otherwise. Then he’s not. The prudent remember that. And do not mistake those qualities as weakness.”

“I’ll give you a personal example. My crewmates will tell you I am an arrogant ass.” Nhan grinned as Connelly continued, “It’s true I can be. I don’t apologize for it. Mostly Captain Pike ignores it. If it gets out of hand, he admonishes me for it … hard. Still I wouldn’t give up my assignment on Enterprise.”

“That’s … well it is a lot to think about,” Michael said while Tilly returned the trays. “Shall we show you to your quarters?”

“Yes please.” As they walked the hallway Connelly spoke. “One other piece of advice. Don’t assume when you don’t hear from him about something you’ve done that you got away with it. Rather Captain Pike has chosen not to mention it. He notices everything. It’s like a freakish superpower.”

Later that evening Tilly asked, “What do you think about our new captain?”

Michael waited for a while before answering. “I am not sure. Maybe I am hesitant to trust anyone new. Maybe he reminds me too much of my Captain Georgiou and how much I still miss her.” And maybe he reminds me I destroyed my relationship with my brother and of all I missed because of that, she thought.

“It would be nice if you could ask Spock about him.”

“Yes,” Michael responded, the sorrow plain in her voice.

Chapter Text

Lieutenant Gen Rhys kept losing track of the conversation. He, along with most of the main bridge crew were in Sickbay One, gathered around Michael who was undergoing treatment for her leg injury. The conversation bounced between the Hiawatha rescue mission, the red bursts, the asteroid fragment captured earlier and their new permanent interim captain, a label coined by Tilly. He murmured acknowledgements periodically, but his attention continued to drift back to Michael’s nurse, Bonnie O’Malley. He was summoning the courage to ask her out, had been for several months now, which amused his friends and earned him the nickname ‘turtle.’ Currently he was in the ‘quick glances at her when he thought she wasn’t looking’ stage.

To be fair, his reticence wasn’t only an innate shyness around women. Captain Lorca, rumored to have seduced several crewmembers, discouraged intimate relationships among the rest of the crew, citing the brutal uncertainty of war. Though it turned out he was assuring the crew stayed isolated from one another, eliminating organized resistance to his actions and policies. And when Lorca discouraged something, it wasn’t done, the risk of unpleasant consequences was too high. Although Starfleet has no rules against fraternization, a crew takes its cues from their captain. The atmosphere and accepted mores of the ship emanate from the commander’s expectations and example.

But Lorca was dead, and the war was over. They were slowing returning to … normal? No, there had never been a time of normalcy on Discovery. They were settling into a promising routine as they prepared for their new captain from Vulcan. But now that changed, and everything felt uncertain again. This relentless cycle was taking a toll on the crew. Best to wait and understand Captain Pike’s rules before plunging ahead.

Tilly lightly punched his arm. “Gen, your turn. One word best describing Captain Pike. Michael said intelligent, I said charm.”

Bryce shook his head, “Obviously you would pick that after your display on the bridge yesterday when he first came on board.”

Tilly blushed, “I was nervous and doubt any of you could have done better. It’s not often you meet a such a highly regarded officer face to face. He’s practically a legend!” And handsome, Tilly thought to herself.

Linus spoke in his native clicks and pops. A few seconds later the universal translator rendered it “Mature.”

“Mature in character or age?” Airiam asked.

Linus tipped his head back and uttered a series of higher pitched clicks and trills his friends understood to be laughter. Then there was a more normal sounding series of pops which translated to “Both are respected in my culture, but I was referring to character.”

“Reckless,” Dr. Pollard contributed as she crossed the room to check on one of the Hiawatha patients.

“Gen?” Tilly prompted.

“I’m thinking.” Rhys answered and gestured for the others to continue.

“Attentive,” Owo offered and then continued, “He said my full name perfectly after hearing it once, half the crew still can’t get it right.”

“Laid-back,” Bryce said. “Until he wasn’t. Do you think that quick switch is a bad sign?

Several shook their heads, several nodded, several shrugged their shoulders conveying uncertainty. Tilly spoke first, “Maybe he was nervous about making a good first impression with us?”

The engineer in the next biobed, Aaron Cummings, answered. “How could that possibly be true. He’s not any Starfleet Captain, he is the Captain of Enterprise! I expect him to be arrogant with an ego the size of the Denobulan asteroid belt. We have to make a good impression on him and simply accept him as he is … good or bad.”

Tilly responded, “Maybe he wants us to like him. I mean, everyone wants to be liked.”

Aaron countered, “Why? We must follow his orders regardless. We’re just the crew of a little science ship, needed only until his real ship is repaired.” No one missed Aaron’s emphasis on the word real. “There are no more than 90 of us and yet, I doubt he will bother to learn our names.” Everyone was silent for a few minutes. Then he added, “Sorry. After the past few months, I’m pretty disillusioned. Even thinking about resigning my commission.”

“I think a crew functions best if respect flows both ways,” Tilly said.

Bryce added, “But there is a difference between liking and respecting. He may have to make decisions or give orders we don’t agree with. In order to do that he can’t be concerned with whether we like him or not. Only if we respect him.” He thought for a few seconds, frowned and then continued, “We have to follow his orders. Does it even matter to him if we respect him?”

“OK, Nilsson your word,” Owo prompted.

“Authoritative.”

“In a good or bad way?” Keyla Detmer asked.

“I don’t know yet,” Nilsson answered. “Airiam?”

“Enabler,” she answered. After the puzzled looks she explained, “He listened to us when we offered suggestions. Acted on our advice. Is it too much to hope he will continue that way?

“Keyla, you are very quiet.” Michael smiled at her. “Your word?”

Keyla smiled back, a sad smile, “There is no one word that says I want him to be like Captain Georgiou.” She paused, “Faith. It never occurred to him there weren’t survivors on the Hiawatha. Or rather he refused to accept there wasn’t, no that’s not quite right either. He believed there could be survivors despite all evidence to the contrary. I like that.”

Rhys attention wandered back to Bonnie. He was drawn to her warm personality, in fact, he couldn’t imagine anyone more suited to nursing – unflappable and able, caring and gentle. A smile and kind word for everyone. Petite with auburn hair that he imagined fell in loose curls around her shoulders. And hazel eyes, he was smitten with her hazel, soulful eyes. Bonnie turned in his direction and smiled shyly. Then walked over to check her patient. “Sorry to interrupt. Commander your treatment is done. You need to stay immobile for another 30 minutes and then you’re discharged and released to full duty.”

Tilly shot Rhys a wicked smile, “Stay and join our conversation. Gen is about to give us his one word to describe our new Captain.”

Bonnie turned and smiled again at Rhys. He shot Tilly a ‘I’ll get you for this later’ look. “Gravitas,” he said.

“Interesting.” Tilly replied and then playing matchmaker turned to Bonnie, “Did you know Gen was a test pilot? I think pilots and soldiers are sexy. What about you?”

Bonnie chose to assume the question referred to one word describing their new captain and not whether Rhys is sexy. Who she liked, a lot, but assumed the attraction was not mutual. “Captain Pike? Nice. He came to Sickbay earlier to check on the shuttle bay specialist injured while prepping the landing pods. When he said hello, I got nervous and dropped a tray of meds. He must be overwhelming busy, but he stopped and helped me clean-up the mess. And then talked to me for several minutes. Just idle chit-chat. But for those few minutes I felt like I had his complete, undivided attention. That I mattered.”

Max, from security, who had just joined the group contributed four words, “Insane triple OG badass,” ending the conversation, because who could top that?

ooooo

Pike was taking a ‘walkabout’ through Discovery, the name given by the security chief on Enterprise to this typically monthly ritual. A stroll through the ship. Face time with members of the crew far removed from the captain’s orbit. A chance to gauge if needs were not making it though the chain of command. Another way to build trust and credibility with the crew who, when facing danger, looked to him to see them safely through. Judging by the many looking down and away when he passed or standing at attention when he tried to engage them in conversation, this needed to be a weekly habit.

Several exhibited classic signs of post-traumatic stress and he made a mental note to talk with Dr. Pollard about treatment. Many with PTSD hid their symptoms to avoid being removed from duty and sent to a starbase psychiatric facility. Pike took a different approach. When possible, that is unless a danger to themselves or others, or leave was requested, they were treated on board the ship. Where they had the support system of their crewmates. Because only their crewmates truly understood what was endured.

After they were exploited by their last captain who didn’t care if they lived or died once his goals were accomplished, Pike wondered if he would be able to earn the crew’s trust. Since they fought in the bloody Klingon war and I was held away from it, waiting in safety as they watched comrades die, maybe I don’t deserve their trust … or respect.

His regard for Commander Saru was growing. Saru found ways to hold this crew together through the war. He protected them in the mirror universe. He inspired them to find a way home. The Discovery crew was young and inexperienced, but talented and Saru funneled that talent into solutions. And Pike had not forgotten reports of how well Saru led the Shenzou after the loss of Captain Georgiou during the Battle of the Binary Stars. After the mutiny.

Saru comported himself with grace and dignity through this unexpected change of command which may have felt like a demotion. He is not yet quite ready for his own ship, but soon, very soon. There were a few at the Admiralty looking to cover their own mistakes by blaming Saru for the debacle with Lorca. Pike resolved to protect his new XO from any fallout.

A call from the bridge interrupted his thoughts. “Captain the communication channel you requested is established.”

“Thank you, please send it to the ready room. I’ll be there in five minutes.” Pike sighed and then straightened his shoulders. It was time to deliver the news to Lieutenant Connelly’s parents. He regretted not intervening more forcefully to curb Evan’s tendency to turn everything into a competition. Once at that point, Connelly often paid more attention to winning than the circumstances. This time it cost the young science officer everything. And while it was not his fault, Pike did view it as his responsibility.

ooooo

Kelpiens were fatalistic. Yes, they knew joy and contentment, they aspired to knowledge and learning, and they accepted their role in preserving the great balance. This tendency wasn’t defeatist, but rather making peace with their destiny. Untempered that fatalism morphed into a belief that desires never materialized.

Yet today, for this Kelpien, one did. He was cheated of the chance to learn more from Captain Georgiou. Now, suddenly he was first officer to one of the most esteemed captains in the fleet. Almost as if fate reached out and corrected a wrong. His instincts assumed it wouldn’t last, that this second opportunity would be cruelly lost. He knew better but this was his cultural habit.

Initially Saru was disappointed and vexed Command didn’t trust him and the Discovery crew to investigate the signals without a more senior officer on board. How much more did they have to do to prove themselves? But now, having served under this new commander for two days, Saru believed this situation and this ship needed Pike.

He intended to make the most of the opportunity and to take care of his Captain. Settling in for a long night, he started preparing.

ooooo

After a busy couple of days rescuing the survivors on the Hiawatha and capturing a piece of the asteroid, the main topic of conversation among the crew was Captain Pike remaining on board as interim captain. Yesterday that possibility, while exciting at first, caused tension and anxiety. They had prepared for their Scientist-Vulcan-Captain. They got the Captain of the Enterprise. Today that reality was starting to be welcomed – at least a bit.

Crew members were starting to recount their own experiences with Captain Pike instead of repeating hearsay. Such as the bridge crew and their surprise when he asked for their names, listened, and then repeated those names back perfectly.

That he publicly thanked Michael, Owo, and Detmer for saving his life.

That he helped a young nurse pick up the things she dropped when he entered Sickbay.

That he stopped to shoot a few hoops during a basketball game in the gym. And while not great, was not too bad either. Which he joked about.

That he called Lieutenant Connelly’s family personally delivering the news of their son’s death.

That he turned command of the ship over to Commander Saru when capturing the asteroid fragment.

Maybe, just maybe, this would work out after all.

Chapter Text

Tilly, Burnham, Stamets, and Saru are in Engineering after Tilly confesses to Michael her visions of May.

“I am sorry I didn’t tell you.” Tilly looks miserable as she apologizes to Saru.

“I am sorry too. But thanks to Burnham’s insights, we are closer to a solution. And … getting you back into the Command Training Program.” Saru responds softly to her.

“What about Captain Pike?” Tilly asks.

“I am not familiar enough with the Captain to anticipate his reaction, but I do know that he has a sense of humor … and that he is fond of you.” Saru replies.

…

Saru aims his phaser at the thing extracted from Tilly and shouts, “Security Breach by unknown alien species in Engineering. Engage quarantine protocol alpha-omega.”

ooooo

Christopher Pike paid scant attention to the perks available to starship captains – food preferences, larger quarters, communication channels for personal use to name a few. He ate what the crew ate, needed little personal space as he spent most of his time working, and gave everyone a chance for a brief call home. A replicator in his quarters, standard on Constitution class vessels but absent on Discovery, he missed.

Retreating to quarters for uninterrupted work time after the command training program bridge shadow exercise, Pike found concentration impossible, his thoughts drifting again and again to a myriad of problems. Spock who was unwell, and … missing. A crewman entrusted to his care was seriously ill, running from the authorities after allegedly committing three murders, alone, and in need of help. The relaunch date for Enterprise was pushed back … again. There were no additional clues about the remaining five signals in the weeks since New Eden. Getting Discovery running smoothly was a full-time plus job and most of her crew required a delicate touch.

By mid-afternoon he needed coffee and ventured to the mess hall. That was three hours ago.

Crewmembers tentatively approached asking for approvals, help or simply engaging in conversation, optimism in their eyes they would be treated as valued members of the crew; Pike stopped each time and gave them his full, undivided attention. Then he dealt with a disagreement between two science teams over lab space that had spilled into the hallway and descended into a shouting match. Arbitrarily dividing up the resources between them and caring little if it was fair, he made a mental note to discuss the situation with Saru and Burnham. As lead science officer this was Michael’s problem to solve with Saru as backup. Frustration mounting he thought, on Enterprise this issue would never reach my level nor become a public spectacle.

He walked past engineering and then turned back thinking, might as well talk to Stamets about his request for additional equipment and get that task off the unending to-do list. He found Saru pointing a phaser at a blob floating in a bubble. “Report.” With everyone’s attention focused on the blob, they didn’t hear Pike enter the room nor his demand to explain the situation. He repeated the order in his ‘don’t make me ask you again’ tone of voice.

Tilly spoke first, “I have been seeing and hearing someone or something no one else can see or hear…”

Pike interrupted and pointed at the floating blob, “Let’s start at the end. What is that.”

Saru answered, “We don’t know sir. I assume it is a type of spore. We extracted it from Ensign Tilly.”

“Where is security? And the medical team?” Pike demanded.

Saru decided a simple answer was best, “I have not called for them.”

Tilly noticed the Captain’s brow crease and his normally warm friendly eyes narrow and turn icy blue. He walked to the intercom, activated it, and ordered, “Security send two armed teams to Engineering, intruder protocol. Dr. Pollard I want a medical team in Engineering.”

Pike looked back at his officers. “Continue.”

Unfortunately, Tilly took the lead and explained in her usual round about, too much information at once way. “The entity or vision, I call it May by the way, started after the dark matter shocked me when you were down on New Eden. I wasn’t sure if it was the return of my childhood imaginary friend or a ghost or a delusion, oh and the real May is dead, and she helped me figure out how to use dark matter to save Terralysium. I decided to ignore it hoping it would go away …”

Pike held up his hand. “Stop. When we talked about your rash action in the shuttle bay extracting a piece of dark matter, you had already seen this?” He gestured to the blob.

“No, I had seen May who I went to school with …” Tilly added helpfully. Michael shook her head at Tilly encouraging her to stop.

“And” Pike talked over her, “You. Did. Not. Mention. It.” The medical team entered, and Pike turned to address them. “Please assess Ensign Tilly.”

Paul Stamets joined the medical team and Tilly and quietly explained the events to that point as Pike zeroed in on Michael. “I have been waiting for an update on your earlier assignment. What are you doing here?”

Michael took a deep breath and defended her actions. “Upset after a conversation with my mother I went to my quarters. I was … going to find you later but discovered Tilly crying after she quit the command training program. I thought solving her problem would distract me.” The scientist in Michael took over and she added, “Once I figured out the dark matter shocked Tilly through its container, but it didn’t shock me and I held it in my hand, I reasoned it was attracted to spores and it had to be a something because it didn’t understand tears. With its connection to the spores, I reasoned Stamets would be more helpful than Sickbay.”

“Based on your advanced medical degree and many years of experience in the medical field?” Pike countered. When Michael started to respond he shook his head at her. “Enough. Mr. Saru, your role in this debacle?”

“I wanted to speak with Ensign Tilly about the incident on the bridge and found her in Engineering. The situation rapidly evolved.”

Security had not yet arrived. Pike punched at the intercom. “Bridge get me a secure channel to Enterprise. Send it down here. Helm, best speed to Starbase 1.” He pointed to Saru, Michael, Paul, and Tilly, “The four of you will be in my ready room,” he looked at the medical team and they nodded, “in five minutes. Saru call Airiam to Engineering with a team to study the entity. Medical stay and continue monitoring. Determine if it can be safely moved to the brig. Until then I want it in a level four containment field.”

Bryce called, “Captain, I have your channel to Enterprise.” After acknowledging, Pike barked at the assembled group, “Move. And somebody let me know when Security bothers to show up.”

ooooo

Their evening check-in became a habit since Chris took command of Discovery. A quiet drink, or dinner, sometimes a quick conversation in Phil’s office on busier days. It was a chance for sharing news about Discovery, her crew, and her missions. Today they were sharing a drink in the ready room.

“I talked to Dr. Pollard.” Dr. Phil Boyce’s remark elicited a raised eyebrow from Commander Una. “No new injuries,” he answered the unspoked question, “progress update on the previous one, it’s healing faster than expected contradicting her plan for him easing slowly into a normal routine. I welcomed her to the world of Captain Christopher Pike.”

“I know it shouldn’t surprise me, but jumping on an overloading phaser? We are going to have words about it. I am making notes,” Una replied.

Phil suppressed a laugh. “You? You are going to scold him? For running into danger? I believe this is a case of pot and kettle and one calling the other something.”

Una rolled her eyes. “And you’re not going to admonish him?”

“Of course I am. He expects it. Little good it will do, like asking the wind not to blow.” Then the doctor added softly, “I don’t want to lose either of you.” For a few minutes they sipped their drinks in silence. “It sounds like the Discovery crew is settling after the unexpected change of command. Tracy, that is Dr. Pollard, reports the crew is less apprehensive. Hopeful. Letting down their guard. Dating once again, which Lorca evidently frowned on. Current rumor is Chris happened upon two crewmen running a betting pool, against regulations, for the Federation Cup semi-finals. He responded by placing his own bet.”

Una smiled fondly and shook her head, “You know he’ll lose; he always does.”

Phil added, “And she said we can’t have him back.” He smiled. “She’s quite forceful and would be a good fit for Enterprise. She’ll be an excellent CMO someday.”

“She sounds just like you.” Una remarked.

“I’ll let her know you paid her a high compliment.”

The comm unit chimed and Nicola appeared on the screen, “Number One, incoming transmission from Discovery.” He added with concern in his voice, “It’s on a secure channel.”

Una and Phil sat their drinks on the low table and exchanged troubled looks. “Pipe it down here.”

She was surprised when Discovery’s communication officer, Bryce, rather than Chris appeared on the screen. “Ah, ma’am, I mean sir, sorry, I wanted to ensure the transmission is stable before rerouting. The Captain is not, well he’s not happy.”

“What happened?” Una asked in a clipped direct tone.

“I don’t know sir. I think the Captain is angry about something, he’s shouting.”

“Are you under attack? Is there a problem?” Una barely kept herself from snapping at the young officer.

“Not that I know of. Except for Tilly admonishing Captain Pike on the bridge earlier, in a very loud voice, it’s been a routine day.”

“If he’s shouting, he’s displeased not angry. When he is angry, you will know without a doubt,” Una warned and then added, “You should switch me to Engineering now and avoid further irritating him.”

“Oh, yes, sir. Switching now. Audio only.”

Before she could speak Pike started, “Number One, tell Nhan she’s temporarily transferred to Discovery as security chief. We’ll pick her up in 22 hours. And find out everything you can about Spock.” He added, “Out” and abruptly ended the transmission.

“It appears the children are misbehaving,” Una observed. The Discovery crew is brilliant and talented, and she had her eye on the helmsman Detmer, the ops officer Owo, and a transporter specialist Jason, as possible Enterprise material. Yet they are also young and inexperienced. At some point she and Phil began referring to them as ‘the children.’ She laughed, “Yelling at the Captain on the bridge? What’s he running … a nursery school?”

Phil picked up his drink, inclined it towards her and took a sip. “Yes, they don’t engage in mature hijinks like breaking into the Captain’s liquor cabinet for the good stuff,” he replied in a dry tone.

Una took a sip and sighed. “Scotty really outdid himself with this bottle. Too bad Chris is missing it. Besides, this isn’t a game between children, it’s a competition between adults. Chris only locks the cabinet so I will break into it. He knows I will break into it. I know he knows I will break into it. He knows that I know that he knows I will break into it.”

“And the non-childish part would be?”

“It’s a match of wits; how long will it take me to defeat the lock he devised. This one was clever. A riddle releasing a package containing a Vulcan puzzle box which held the key to the cabinet. Took me two and a half weeks,” she held up her glass, “but was worth the reward.”

Chapter Text

Captain Pike entered his ready room after ensuring the security teams were in place, his orders were crystal clear, and they understood, in detail, why he was displeased with their response time. As the medical team watched they silently thanked Tracy Pollard for taking initiative and filling the leadership gap in Sickbay. She had them equipped and in Engineering three minutes after the Captain’s request.

The quartet waiting for him were seated around the conference table and immediately stood and came to attention when Pike entered. Once the doors closed, they started to sit. “Stay standing,” Pike ordered and began reviewing the various items left for him on the desk.

Tilly started, “Captain, this is all my …”

Pike held up his hand stopping her explanation and ending any further conversation. Silence is a powerful tool and Pike had learned to wield it effectively. A brief silence calms, creates intimacy and encourages the sharing of confidences. It demonstrates respect. A protracted silence unnerves foes often leading them to impulsive actions weakening their position, exerts dominance, and in this case, breaks down defensiveness. And, as most species dislike protracted quiet and crave anything to fill the emptiness, makes even the toughest person uneasy.

Fifteen minutes later Pike judged they were ready to listen rather than make excuses. He joined them at the head of the conference table. “Ensign you have been seeing and interacting with something since New Eden, in other words, for several weeks?” Tilly nodded, looking miserable. “And you decided the best course of action was not to report this?”

“Yes sir, but I …”

A slight shake of his head silenced her. “You are confined to quarters until I call for you. Dismissed.” Shoulders slumped Tilly slowly walked out of the room.

Pike turned to Michael. “Commander, the Vulcan Ambassador’s wife left the ship unexpectedly and you are aware I am very invested in learning what was extracted from the file you were examining. Yet you went to your quarters during your duty shift rather than reporting both to me?”

Michael suddenly found her boots interesting. Looking back up she responded, “Yes sir.”

“You are confined to quarters until I call for you. Dismissed.” Michael looked to Saru, hesitating for a moment. After seeing Saru’s slight nod and Pike’s annoyed expression she quickly exited.

“Mr. Stamets, I will deal with you first. Commander Saru return to your post on the bridge.” Once Saru departed Pike crossed his arms and faced the scientist. “Explain.”

Paul shrugged slightly. “It’s straightforward, Michael and Tilly came to me for help, and I helped.”

Pike narrowed his eyes. “You helped? A crewmate came to you asking for assistance because she was not only seeing something no one else did but also carrying on conversations with it. For weeks. And you didn’t think it important to involve a doctor or the commanding officer of this ship?

“Michael explained her theory regarding its affinity for spores and I was curious. So, no sir.”

“Continue.”

“I scanned Tilly and discovered the foreign organism. Then I…”

Pike interrupted, “then you extracted it, once again without notifying anyone. At what point did you plan to inform your Captain?”

“Saru was there, so I assumed he would when he felt it was necessary. And it is, after all, my lab.”

Pike’s eyes narrowed further. “Which is on my ship. You would do well to remember that in the future.”

“Are we done, sir?”

“Nearly. I prefer to be informed about too much rather than too little. Remember that. This is your one and only warning. Dismissed.”

It amused Pike to watch Stamets stroll unhurried out of the ready room, reminding Pike of himself as a junior officer, any little act of defiance to get the last word. Friends of the scientist had relayed their concern over the astromycologist’s uncharacteristic passiveness since Hugh’s death. Pike was pleased to see a bit of the man who went head-to-head with Lorca reemerging.

Pike had reversed Command’s decision to delay the scientist’s departure from Starfleet to the Vulcan Science Academy. Losing a spouse was horrific enough without continuing to live and work amidst all the memories. Reversed it until he learned how important the spore drive could be for this mission. For now, the best he could do for this soul in his care was continuing to watch for ways to lessen the burden. Which felt inadequate after a devastating loss.

Sighing he called the bridge, “Commander Saru, you’re up.”

Saru entered the ready room with his apology already in progress, “Sir, I was …”

“assessing and then responding to a rapidly evolving situation. Is my conclusion correct?” Pike finished.

“Yes sir, but…”

“There is nothing you need to add. I have one request,” Pike stopped and smiled, “the next time an unknown entity is being extracted from a member of my crew, I’d appreciate a heads up.”

“Understood Captain.” Saru wasn’t sure if that was an admonishment or humor. Or both. He was still figuring out this captain

“Let’s move on. There will be no reprimand for the earlier incident on the bridge with Tilly during shadow exercises. Let’s forget it. And I refuse her request to quit the command training program. Please inform her.”

“People are talking about it. Shall I stop that?”

“No, any intervention from us will only fuel the rumors. Let it die out on its own. Next topic. Security is a mess and with our mission, I need someone there who knows my expectations. When we reach space dock, Commander Nhan will join Discovery as head of security. It’s a temporary posting, ending when I return to Enterprise. Please ensure the necessary arrangements are made. Tell me about the previous CMO.”

“Dr. Messan was a research scientist at Oxford before she was drafted by Lorca to serve on Discovery. Few know starship captains have the power to draft any resource deemed necessary …”

Pike waved off the explanation, “I am familiar, skip ahead.”

“She is knowledgeable and well credentialed and …” Saru searched for positive ways to describe their former CMO, who was kindly and well regarded personally.

“I reviewed her records. She never practiced medicine after her residency and certainly never during a war. She’s a research scientist.”

“She spent most of her time in her lab and left the day-to-day management of Sickbay to the senior doctors and nurses,” Saru admitted.

“Another brilliant choice,” Pike mused aloud.

“Excuse me sir?”

“Lorca neutered the office on board with the most authority to challenge him. I assume Hugh Culber filled the void until his death?” Saru nodded. “I had planned to avoid making any divisional appointments that Captain Selyk will have to change or live with but this one can’t wait any longer. Dr. Pollard has stepped up without request or recognition and kept Sickbay running. And is doing a fine job. Effective now she’s promoted to CMO.”

“Captain, if I may ask for an indulgence? It is a personal request.” After Pike nodded Saru continued, “May I inform her of the appointment? It is … I am fond of her … and we have been through a lot together.”

“Yes, I think that is appropriate.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“Moving on to Ensign Tilly and Commander Burnham …” Pike began.

ooooo

Michael and Tilly had been waiting for the Captain’s call for two hours. Two very, very, very long hours.

Michael paced. Tilly cried. Michael tried Vulcan meditation techniques and failed. Tilly paced and talked about never becoming a captain or remaining on a starship. Michael tried combing through Spock’s medical file but couldn’t concentrate. Tilly cried. Michael paced, desperately wanting to take a run through the ship and shed her nervous tension. Tilly started pacing as well, periodically waving her arms as she made some unheard point, the two performing an intricate dance to avoid running into one another in the small room.

Simultaneously they collapsed on their beds. “I’m in so much trouble and I don’t think I will be able to talk my way out of it,” Tilly observed, eyes puffy and red, cheeks streaked with tears.

“I think we both are,” Michael responded.

“But the Captain already warned me about not asking for permission before I tried to extract the dark matter. This time I kept quiet about a problem for weeks. I’m done for. But it made sense to me at the time, keeping quiet about it that is.”

“He keeps things from us,” Michael said quietly.

Tilly continued thinking out loud, “I wasn’t sure I could trust him. I thought he would assume I was losing it and send me away so not to be bothered during an important mission. You know Nhan and Connelly warned us.”

Michael, distracted by her own thoughts, missed most of Tilly’s comment. “What?”

“Nhan and Connelly, they said Captain Pike was laid back until he had reason not to be. Then he wasn’t. We gave him reason today.” Tilly shook her head. “He’s been kind … and fair to me. Patient when I ramble and say silly things, turning the time I displayed his file into a way to connect with his new crew which took attention off my screw up. Making my punishment for trying, alone, to extract the dark matter the very thing I wanted to accomplish. But sometimes we treat him like he’s Lorca.”

“But he kept my brother’s illness from me,” Michael countered, like she was looking for reasons to stay angry.

“He honored Spock’s wishes. That’s not about keeping something from you, that’s about taking care of his crew. One who wasn’t even on board his ship anymore. I think that’s admirable.”

“But I am Spock’s sister. My parents and I had a right to know.”

Tilly smiled at her sadly. Michael had been through so much and this recent reemergence of Spock in her life was tearing her apart. “I’m sorry but no, you don’t. I didn’t know your mother was here. Was it a good visit? I’d be terrified if my mother came on board.”

“No, definitely not a good visit.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No. And you’re wrong. The Captain should have told me about Spock right away. Tilly, I would have found a way to help him despite our strained relationship. He’s my only brother and he needs family right now. He needs me. What if I am the only person who can help him?” Michael punched the mattress and started pacing again.

“You know Michael, I don’t think you are mad at Captain Pike, I think you are mad at yourself and projecting it on to him,” Tilly said with her usual bluntness.

Deep down Michael knew Tilly was right but was unready to deal with that, so she buried it deeper. Instead she snapped back, “Stop playing armchair psychologist, you are horrible at it.” And added heading for the door, “I need to get out of this room.”

As Michael left Tilly called after her, “But the Captain said …”

ooooo

Saru stopped by the mess hall for a cup of tea after leaving the celebration in Sickbay. Word had quickly spread among Dr. Pollard’s staff who were surprised, pleased but surprised, to see her hard work didn’t go unnoticed.

His thoughts turned to the earlier conversation with the Captain about Tilly. Saru didn’t believe Pike had favorites among his crew, but something about Tilly had roused the Captain’s protective instincts and those were fierce. Pike was furious Tilly was placed on a starship during the war. Before, the Captain had said adamantly, she was ready. Where Lorca exploited her. Because he needed her to pose as Discovery’s leader in the mirror universe. Yes, she had been invaluable. To Starfleet and the Federation, Pike had agreed and then added, but they put her into the command training program out of misplaced gratitude without thinking through the consequences. Again, before she was ready. Pike was concerned all of this would derail her hopes and dreams and was determined to help her avoid that.

When Saru saw Michael enter the room he beckoned her over. “Commander, you were confined to quarters, why are you here?”

“I am thirsty, surely I am allowed a water ration?”

“That is a bit dramatic, it has been only two and a half hours.”

She sat down with a huff. “I needed to get out of that confined space. Can you understand?”

“I do and I sympathize, but it is imprudent.”

Her silence concerned him, as if she were considering marching to the bridge and confronting Pike. Then she looked weary like all her energy suddenly dissipated. She shook her head and answered, “You are right. I will get dinner for Tilly and myself before I head back so if the Captain asks you are covered.”

Saru inclined his head to her as thanks deciding to wait until tomorrow before discussing the moment in the ready room when she glanced to him for what felt like permission before obeying Pike.

ooooo

It was so late at this point Pike thought he had missed her but nonetheless stopped by Sickbay. And there was Dr. Pollard working in what was now her office. He rapped lightly on the door. Smiling he said, “You know Doctor, when you keep hours like these, you can no longer complain about mine.”

Tracy snorted which reminded him of Enterprise’s CMO, “Little chance of that sir.”

She’s a natural for this position, Pike thought. “Congratulations Tracy.”

“Thank you, Captain. I intend to see your faith in me proves justified.”

“Of that I have no doubt. Oh, and now you don’t have to sneak when trading information with Phil Boyce.”

“Excuse me sir? And for the record I never sneak”

Pike chuckled. “I knew he and Commander Una would look for, shall we call it, an informal way to find out what is happening on Discovery. You were the logical choice after my small accident on New Eden.”

Tracy stood up and replied loudly, “Small accident? You call nearly getting yourself killed by choosing … choosing! to jump on an exploding phaser a small accident?” Then she mumbled under her breath, “You’re daft.”

“What was that Lieutenant? I missed the last part.” He smiled again so she would know he was teasing rather than annoyed.

“I said you are daft, sir. Yes daft. Do you have a problem with that?”

“Not at all. Tell Phil the next time you talk I am in good hands.” He turned to leave and then added, “For the record, I think you would have done the same thing. Goodnight, Doctor.”

Tracy concealed her pleasure with the conversation and her slight embarrassment with his last comment until Pike departed.

Chapter Text

Michael spent the night reexperiencing the last moments of yesterday’s conversation with her foster mother. When she confessed to Amanda her harsh words to Spock during their childhood. When Amanda refused her help finding Spock. When Amanda turned away from her, in anger and sorrow. The sorrow and the disappointment behind it were harder to bear than the anger. I have to fix it, Michael thought.

Saru called at 6:00am the next morning. “Ensign Tilly, you are released from confinement. Report for your regular duty shift. The Captain will speak with you later. And he asked me to relay that your request to drop out of the command training program is denied. Commander Burnham meet me in the main conference room in 15 minutes.”

Tilly pulled the blanket over her head and groaned. “I just want to get this over with. How much longer do you think he will make me wait?”

“It’s a tactic, ignore it,” Michael responded as she finished making her bed, the covers folded down precisely three inches, the corners neatly and tautly tucked.

“I don’t think so, I’m pretty sure the Captain has more things on his plate than yelling at me for my latest stupid mistake. Based on my track record, he should set up a recurring appointment for it.”

“We were handling it. It was the right plan.”

Tilly looked thoughtful, “Maybe, but … having thought about it all night, I think we were wrong. I was wrong. What if May lured me into causing harm to one of you or the ship? What if May needs help and we’re too late now? If I had trusted the Captain or at least reported my experience with May to Saru, I would have avoided these weeks of stress. And had my mind on my duties where it belonged.” Tilly muttered, mainly to herself, “I should apologize.”

Michael turned to face Tilly, “My brother needs me. Has needed me for weeks. But Pike kept that knowledge from me and my parents. Now Spock is in trouble, serious trouble, all of which could have been avoided if I had only known. I could have prevented this. This is Pike’s fault.”

“That’s Captain Pike,” Tilly quietly reminded her.

Frustrated, Michael said harshly, “I’m late,” and left their quarters. By the time she reached the conference room she was ready for a fight. And if she kept fixing things, maybe, just maybe, she could atone for hurting her brother all those years ago and fix her most egregious mistake. I am right, I am certain of it. Almost twenty years later, the terror of losing her parents was as painful as the day it happened.

ooooo

The door to the conference had barely closed when Micheal said, “Saru, the Captain is wrong, we, I, did nothing wrong. We are the senior officers on the ship, and we had the situation under control.”

“I advise against explaining it to the Captain in that manner. And I did not call you here to speak of yesterday’s events in Engineering. We must discuss what happened afterwards in the Captain’s ready room.” Michael sat in a chair, perched on the edge, spine ramrod straight. Saru continued, “I may be mistaken, and I hope that I am. Why did you look to me when the Captain dismissed you?”

Michael tilted her head slightly. Then exhaled. “The Discovery should be ours. We earned it. By getting the crew home safely from the mirror universe. And delivering the cloaking algorithm. By ending the war with the Klingons. You should be its captain. We and our crew can be trusted to investigate the signals without oversight from a higher ranking officer. We can fix this; you should talk to Admiral Cornwell.”

Saru shook his head. “No Michael, I am not yet ready to be the captain. Nor are you. Nor are we ready to lead this mission without a safety net.” When Michael began protesting, he signaled for her to wait. “Not being ready does not take away from our accomplishments. Serving under Captain Pike has reinforced that for me. And I want to learn from him before taking full responsibility for a ship and crew.”

“You are not disappointed?” Michael asked, surprised.

“I admit I was at first. But now I am … appreciative. Serving with Captain Pike is an opportunity we should embrace.”

“But …”

“Please do not fight a battle for an assignment I do not want. And please do not disrespect the Captain on my behalf.”

“Alright.” But I am right she thought, and I am going to fix this too.

“Then there is no need to speak of this again. Come, the Captain is waiting.” Saru walked her to the ready room.

ooooo

Pike spent several hours the previous night thinking through how to handle the situation with Michael. He had granted her a lot of leeway due to her relationship with and his affection for Spock. And, he admitted to himself, his guilt over not intervening earlier during Spock’s illness. On reflection maybe too much leeway he had decided.

He found Michael to be brilliant, talented, confident, and ambitious. Driven to serve. And at times consumed with atoning for the defining trauma of her childhood – the certainty she caused her parents’ deaths. Which had on a few occasions led to poor decisions for all the right reasons.

If she had been adopted by a human family and raised on Earth, would she have made peace with that trauma when she was young? Still feeling sadness but not guilt, able to look back with fondness but be at peace? Did the Vulcan method of burying the tragedy and her feelings behind logic, though well-intentioned, form her relentless willingness to do anything to avoid additional loss and reenforce an insatiable need to fix? She claimed her emotions informed her logic, but sometimes her emotions hold her logic captive. All these thoughts informed Pike’s choices for their upcoming conversation and the next steps.

Balancing the required admonishment with constructively moving forward would be delicate.

When Michael entered the ready room, Pike indicated she should take a seat in the informal, intimate side of the room and sat opposite of her. “Commander, what happened yesterday with your mother?”

Michael, expecting a reprimand, was taken aback. “It is personal sir.”

“I understand. But given she came to us for help and I requested you break into the medical file so we could, together, find a way to exonerate Spock, then she left abruptly and you later kept me uninformed of a potential danger to at least one member of this crew, I believe I am entitled to ask.”

“As I was entitled to know about where my brother was?” Michael baited. “You withheld vital information from me. Until the mission required otherwise.”

And there it was. The hurt and anger leading her back to a long-time habit of taking all the obligation for solving a problem. Then acting without permission or oversight. “I won’t apologize for that, nor do I feel there is reason or need for defending my decision. I ask again, what happened yesterday with your mother?”

Michael stood and responded with an edge in her voice, “And I say again, it is personal. And unrelated to the incident for which you believe I require discipline. Therefore logic … and protocol, dictate the question is out of bounds. If that is all sir, I should resume my work.”

“That is not all Commander, please sit down.” Pike said, his voice quiet and authoritative. She waited a moment and before returning to her seat. “You are close to insubordination and heading, once again, for a precipice. If you tumble off this time, there will be no second chances.” He paused and sighed. “You are angry, in pain, and fumbling your responsibilities as chief science officer. Let me help you so we can help Spock.”

Michael weighed her options. Pike could marshal resources far outside her reach. His belief in Spock’s innocence was firm and his concern for her felt genuine. If she made another error, this time it was her brother’s life at stake. Deciding she said, “I learned from my mother Spock saw the red angel when he was a child. On the night I ran away from home. The information the red angel gave him saved my life. This visitation coincided with a change to Spock’s personality. He buried his … human traits. My mother believes that change was due to the red angel. I know it was not. I did that to him. When I explained this and apologized, my mother departed intending to find Spock on her own.”

Pike looked thoughtful. “I see. And you felt, once again, as if you had lost a parent. You did this to protect him?”

Michael nodded and then said quietly, “I pushed him away, cruelly. To keep him safe.”

“That’s a big choice for a young girl. It must have hurt you as well, losing your close relationship with a sibling you loved.”

Michael’s voice was quieter, “Yes. And because of that choice he didn’t want family around when he needed us. I’m to blame for his current situation.”

Pike smiled at her sympathetically. “I disagree, but we’ll come back to that. Michael, once Spock admitted himself to the facility on Starbase 5, he was never on his own. I hope that gives you some comfort.” She nodded reluctantly and he continued. “You believe if I had told you about Spock’s illness earlier you could have prevented the alleged murder of his doctors and his escape?” She nodded again. “Then yesterday, angry with me, upset over your mother, you went to your quarters and discovered Tilly’s problem. Which you decided solving would lessen the pain of your own difficulties?”

“Yes. Though to be honest, I had all afternoon and all night to get angrier with you.” She thought she saw his mouth twitch, as if he were trying to suppress a smile.

“Yes, you did. I’d like to convince you to let go of the guilt you feel over Spock’s current difficulty and your parent’s death. You could not have prevented either and neither are your fault. Perhaps someday, when you are ready, you will.” Michael started to protest, but he shook his head and continued, “Spock serves under my command. His welfare is my responsibility. For now, let me bear the guilt alone so your energy is freed and focused on helping him. That is how you fix it.”

“But sir, you shouldn’t …”

Pike’s eyes narrowed but his expression was amused. “Are you about to attempt a logical argument that you are guilty and I am not?” Michael considered for a few seconds and then shook her head. Satisfied he continued in a more serious tone, “It happened on my watch. And the Discovery crew is also in my care. I own the ‘fix it’ list for both.”

“Sir, I don’t know what you mean.”

“Commander, I believe that you do. Have I made myself clear?”

“Yes, sir.”

“You are excused from your shift for the rest of the day. Go get some rest.”

Michael left feeling weary – very weary – and lighter. By the next morning she felt almost like the self she remembered from before the Battle of the Binary Stars. Which was astonishing. And welcome.

ooooo

“Captain, may I speak first?” Tilly asked as she sat in a chair facing the desk in the ready room. She held up a PADD. “I wrote down what I want to say so I will be concise and not forget anything important.”

“You may.”

Tilly took a deep breath and reminded herself to speak slowly. “Sir, I apologize. I offer no excuses. I was wrong. I behaved impulsively. I failed you three times. First by not reporting my experience with May immediately. Then by running from the bridge without permission after my tirade during shadow exercises. That was disrespectful. Finally, I should have explained to you our plan to have Commander Stamets investigate my problem and asked your permission before proceeding. And I am ready to accept the consequence of my actions.” She paused and reviewed her notes.

Thinking she was done, Pike started to respond. Tilly held up her hand to stop him and then continued. “You trusted me to learn from my mistake when trying to extract the dark matter. I didn’t trust you in return and made a bigger mistake. I am truly sorry.”

“My turn now?” Pike asked.

“Ah, yes. That’s all I wrote.”

Excellent Tilly, Pike thought. “You have taken your first significant step towards being a captain. You used the time you were given wisely, moved past excuses, and objectively analyzed your actions. The assessment and subsequent choices … writing an apology for example … demonstrate maturity. Well done. On the insights and apology, I mean. The mistakes you made in this situation are serious. And I am disappointed our conversation after the incident in the shuttle bay had little impact on your tendency to act first and then ask for forgiveness as well little influence on your impulsiveness.”

Tilly looked down at the floor. “Yes, sir.”

“Ensign, Starfleet officers, regardless of what they are facing, keep their eyes up and facing forward. Look at me.”

Doing as asked, she replied in a steadier voice, “Yes, sir.”

“What do you think I should do next?” Pike queried.

Tilly smiled slightly and looked hopeful. “Forget about it since I have learned my lesson?”

“Not likely. Try again.”

“Assign me extra duty in Engineering?” She offered.

Pike chuckled. “That would be like sending a child to her room. The room with all her toys. Try again.”

“Swab the decks in the shuttle bay? Cleaning the mess hall with my toothbrush?”

Pike shook his head. “OK, enough. And you are watching too many old movies. Tilly, you have the potential to be an effective leader. Is command still your goal?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Then you have to be as serious about that as you are about science and engineering, about learning and exploring. I am not seeing that yet. The physical training and course work you have undertaken are important. But what do you think is the most vital thing you will learn in this beginning command training program and the following training tracks?”

Tilly thought for a few moments. “How each area of the ship works. How to lead. Battle tactics. Negotiation skills. How to harness the talents of my crew.”

“You named five things. Is one more important than the others?”

“No sir, I don’t think so. All are equally important.”

“Try again,” Pike suggested. Walking to a wall mounted viewscreen to check the ship’s status, he gave her space and time for consideration without him watching. Ten minutes later he retrieved two cups from the replicator, sat in the chair beside her and handed her one. “I am aware of your fondness for expresso. What is your answer?”

Tilly downed the entire drink in single gulp. “How to deal with the situations I will encounter. To be exposed to each and learn the correct responses, the best actions.”

“Do you think that is possible?” He asked quietly as he sipped his own coffee.

“Isn’t that why it takes so long to become a captain?”

“You are right, in a way. But the situations you face as a commander will be new, will be unique. The goal of all the command training tracks is to prepare you to meet and manage the unknown, with a smaller and smaller safety net as you progress through each track. To internalize a set of skills and principles which will guide you. To understand that right and wrong are not always clear-cut. To accept that sometimes all available options are bad. With that in mind what is the most vital thing we can teach you?”

“Judgement,” Tilly answered in a confident, definitive tone.

“That’s right, very good. When you are a captain there may not be anyone to question your decisions. Or there may be too many doubting your choices. Listen to the advice of your crew, your superiors, your confidants. But, in the end, you alone make the decision and accept the consequences. You must examine your choices and mistakes objectively. You did well with that today. And you must learn rashness and wishing something unpleasant will go away can be deadly and stop yourself from going down that path.”

“I understand. My motto should be Report, Think, Think More, Ask Permission, Act.”

Pike smiled at her. “Yes, at this point in your career that will serve you well. Because you used the time I gave you for reflection on yesterday’s incident and your choices over the past few weeks rather than planning your defense, I’m won’t put a reprimand in your file, however …”

Tilly talked over him, excited she was being given another chance, “Oh thank you, thank you.”

“However,” Pike emphasized as he continued “if this happens again I will. After three reprimands, you will lose your spot in the command training program and any chance of advancing in rank. Is that clear?”

Tilly tried looking appropriately serious though she was thrilled with his leniency, “Yes sir.”

“Good. You will pull two extra duty shifts a week for the next six weeks. See Commander Saru for your assignments.” He handed her a PADD. “And you will study the five missions I have listed and in 10 days be ready to discuss with me your assessment of each. Any questions?”

Tilly shook her head.

“Then you are dismissed.”

ooooo

Phil Boyce and Commander Una caught up over a late dinner. One she was enjoying, and he was stabbing his fork at, periodically holding up a piece of raw fish and frowning.

Una gestured with her fork, “Not to your liking?”

Phil grimaced, “I prefer my fish cooked and my salads to be seaweed free. How long do you think Chef will be channeling his inner sushi master?”

Una laughed, “The week is almost over, he should tire of it soon and be onto a new obsession. You could have chosen something from the replicator.”

“And ruin my chance for coq au van? You know how temperamental Chef can be especially if he feels we have failed to appreciate his latest creation.”

“Yes, so you should clean your plate like a good boy and save us all from his wrath. When I chatted with Chef today, he mentioned he’s been talking with the sous chef on Discovery. I think his name is Kofi. They’ve bonded over their mutual frustration with Captain Pike.”

This time Phil chuckled. “You mean that Chris often views food like sleep and exercise … requirements to maintain his body, but necessitating little attention or preference otherwise? Or as Chef so delicately pronounces … that Chris has no damn palate whatsoever?”

“Exactly. Kofi hasn’t surrendered to the inevitable yet and was looking to Chef for ideas. I encouraged Chef to keep in touch, everyone on a ship talks freely to the stewards and cooks. He will keep us up to date.”

“You have built quite the spy network. Cleverly arranging for Nhan to be onboard when Chris first assumed command, Chef and Kofi, me and Tracy Pollard, Nicola and Bryce, you and Saru. By the way, Tracy was promoted to CMO. And Chris is on to her conversations with me. Not that that will stop her.”

Una nodded, looking satisfied. And fierce. “He’s still my Captain and still my responsibility. I will make use of any way I can to protect him.”

As will I, thought Phil.

Chapter Text

At 6:15am, Christopher Pike, finishing his morning run, rounded the corner and saw a tall, dark-haired woman of Asian-Indian descent standing in front of his quarters. She shifted from one leg to the other, radiating nervousness. And thus began his fourth official day as Captain of the Discovery.

While Lila was waiting for the Captain to arrive, she could not stop replaying in her head yesterday’s conversation with Commander Saru. A familiar feeling of dread bubbled up when he asked her to once again take on the duty of captain’s yeoman. “But sir, I thought one of the command training program ensigns was assigned to take over that post.”

“Yes. However, none of the trainees are ready to support a commander of Captain Pike’s stature and with the nature of our new mission, I think it is vital the Captain has a resource who can fill in details about the ship and her crew. Lieutenant Emani, I am aware of what you endured when serving as yeoman to Captain Lorca. I would not ask this of you if I believed that situation would be repeated. And I stress this is a request not a demand. I consider you the best resource and that is important for our mission, but it is your choice.”

After talking it through with her roommate, she agreed. This morning, unsure about the decision and lost in thought, she didn’t hear the Captain join her at the door nor heard him say good morning.

“Is there something you need Lieutenant?” He asked, smiling.

She stepped back slightly, startled. “Oh, there you are sir. Sorry. I’m Lieutenant Emani.” She stumbled over the reply and handed him a bottle of cold water.

Thanking her, he pressed the button to open the door and gestured for her to enter ahead of him. She hesitated for a moment then squared her shoulders and stepped inside. Neither went unnoticed by Pike. He keyed the door to remain open and walked to the far wall, putting the desk between them.

Relaxing a little she continued, “I took the liberty of speaking with Ensign Colt on Enterprise. I hope that was OK?” Pike nodded. “She mentioned every morning by 6:30am she drops off a summary from the overnight reports highlighting anything needing your attention. And that you prefer black coffee. Since there isn’t a replicator in your quarters, I brought this.” She handed him a thermos and laid a PADD on the desk.

“I appreciate the initiative. Meet me in the ready room in an hour?”

“Yes, sir.” With restraint she managed to walk rather than run out of his quarters. An hour to get breakfast and chat with her roommate Kofi was welcome.

After getting cleaned up, Pike sipped the coffee as he read through Lieutenant Lila Emani’s personnel records looking for a clue to her skittish behavior. There was none. He would refrain from jumping to any conclusions, but one ugly possibility kept raising its hand. One of the original Discovery crewmen and a supply officer transferred to the yeoman’s position by Lorca, she was noted for her discretion and attention to detail.

Katrina Cornwell had summed up the situation on Discovery well – Lorca treated the ship like his own fiefdom. By Pike’s observations, the crew, including senior officers, appeared unwilling – or afraid – to officially report Lorca’s more harmful behaviors. Right or wrong, much was willingly overlooked during the war, but the pieces still had to be put back together afterwards. Now better prepared to work with Lila, Pike left to check in with the bridge before joining her in the ready room.

ooooo

Lila nibbled on the omelet Kofi handed her when she joined him in the galley. “You know, it’s really not fair to the others. These are real eggs.”

“I need taste testers and I have assigned that job to you. And finish all of it. You’ll need it to get through the day,” Kofi ordered. He was temperamental, irreverent, her roommate and her best friend. And he demonstrated his affection by feeding you. “How was it?”

“Hard. I planned to leave everything in his quarters with a note before he got back. Mia Colt told me barring anything critical or unusual, Captain Pike always runs from 5:30am to 6:30am. He got back early this morning. Kofi, I thought I put all this behind me, but I am not sure I can do this.”

Kofi stopped working and sat beside her. “Say the word and I will go explain it to both Saru and Captain Pike. You don’t have to go back.”

Lila took a few more bites as she considered. Then shook her head. “No, you were right yesterday. I should look at this as an opportunity. My experience with Lorca was an exception. And I liked working as the Captain’s assistant. I need to try for at least a week.”

“Good girl,” Kofi replied. “By the end of the week you will have figured out the meaning of the signals and completely reorganized the ship.” He took a bite of her omelet and grinned. “That is good. Sometimes I amaze even myself.”

Chapter Text

Leland’s hologram said, his arms crossed, “There are always lives at stake. That’s what keeps us employed. See we do what we do, so you can do what you do.”

Pike frowned slightly at the representation of his long-time friend. “If I didn’t know you better, that would sound like a threat.”

“You know me pretty well,” Leland responded with a ghost of a smile, tilting his head slightly.

ooooo

Leland sat at the desk in his quarters, a space empty of the personal, of anything that might distract him from his mission. A room cloaked in the grayness of shadows, devoid of even a viewport. For it was in the shadows that danger lurked, waiting for the ideal moment, and it was in the shadows that evil must be defeated. He learned years ago he belonged in the gray margins and retreated there, bit by bit, until the shadows became his entire and only existence. For the greater good. Despite the consequences. This was his mission … no … his calling. And he was ever faithful to that calling regardless of the personal costs to himself and to others.

Michael Burnham had shown real promise until she and the rest of the Discovery crew thwarted Section 31’s plan to destroy the Klingon home world. A plan embraced by Starfleet Command’s Admiralty and the Federation Council until it lost the support of the rank and file. Leland always believed the cold war with the Klingons needed to be pushed to ‘hot’, ending the stalemate and reducing the Klingons to a regional and toothless power. Michael should have been given a medal for her actions at the Battle of the Binary Stars rather than condemned. Section 31 had planned to recruit her and commute her sentence until Lorca got to her first.  

Georgiou’s detainment by Christopher Pike gifted them with an advantage in the race between Section 31 and Starfleet to locate and investigate the seven signals. Not that Starfleet was aware this was a race rather than a cooperative effort. It was rare for Chris to allow anyone to gain a tactical advantage over him. But today he did, and Leland intended to exploit it by assigning Ash Tyler as his liaison to Discovery. A man with a difficult past, utterly loyal to his new home, his new mentor, and his new commander, and with a romantic connection to Michael that could be leveraged. Today was indeed a good day in their fight.

Chris and his first officer, Command Una, were individually worthy and brilliant opponents. As a team they were formidable. They had thwarted Section 31’s every attempt to place an agent on board the Enterprise. Leland often wondered if it was luck or if they were aware of the secret organization’s machinations. Without an agent on board when Enterprise was assigned to investigate the signals, Section 31 lost a valuable opportunity for gathering intelligence. Enterprise immediately went dark and there were never leaks from that crew.

Learning of the curious timing of Lieutenant Spock’s leave, Leland decided to focus on locating the Enterprise’s science officer knowing Chris was fond of Spock. This covert search gained legitimacy after Spock allegedly murdered his doctors and escaped the treatment facility. Leland believed if Section 31 controlled Spock, they would control Chris.

Once Enterprise was suddenly and mysteriously disabled, Chris had transferred his command to Discovery. Where Section 31 had an agent. Though her reports so far were thin, focusing mostly on the rescue of the Hiawatha and Chris’ heroic act on New Eden. The agent was not in the Captain’s orbit and had little access to privileged information. Leland instructed her to find someone on board who interacted with the senior officers and liked to chat.

Now there would be another agent on board – one that could operate openly. And Chris would have to share everything he learned. Chris played by the rules and assumed others would as well. It was one of his weaknesses.

The three personal items Leland allowed himself were on the desk. A book and two pictures. A book of poetry, a birthday present. It had been a joke at the time but … afterwards he had read the book dozens of times and found solace. Found a way to order the chaos. Understood how his legacy would be formed, what he would leave behind.

One picture was taken on a beach in Sydney Australia. The team, his team, their team, smiling and relaxed after training in the Outback. Well, most of the team – Chris was absent, having been called back to Command. He remembered the warm summer night as clearly as if it had happened yesterday. Leland had introduced them to his latest girlfriend. The one they insisted was way out of his league and would soon wise up. The one he thought might be special and merit exception to his ‘two-weeks only’ rule. They had celebrated his birthday and Alex had given him the book.

All his teammates were like brothers, but Alex had been special. Innocent and idealistic, the youngest member of the team and a recent academy graduate. A tough guy, large and towering over all of them, with the soul of a poet. It was now odd to think back to a time when he, Leland, valued idealism, believed in its power. Alex would be disappointed in him.

They had been the elite of the elite. Trusted with sensitive and dangerous missions. Commanded by Chris with Leland as his second. He and Chris started as intense rivals but ultimately built a friendship based on respect and trust. Eventually even Leland came to admit Chris was the more able commander with his strategic brilliance and resolute decision making. And Leland came to understand he preferred the covert role. Though he was still somewhat jealous that Chris was considered the ‘most decorated fighting captain’ in the fleet. An accolade Chris thought was unjustified. Leland always thought Chris’ humility was one of his most annoying traits.

This picture was taken before their last mission together. Before the consequences of that mission set he and Chris on separate paths. Before Alex died because of Leland’s actions and Chris took the blame.

ooooo

Chris remained in his ready room after Leland ended his transmission and Michael left with Georgiou. Troubled by what Leland did – and did not say.

He was now convinced Section 31 did not want to be part of the investigation of the seven signals, rather they wanted to control it. Were they going rogue yet again? The Klingon war would have been the perfect opportunity to regain their independence under the guise of ‘intergalactic security.’ A war they would have been all eager to ignite and exploit.

Early in his career the decades old Klingon cold war had flared into a series of bloody skirmishes with both sides arming factions on non-aligned worlds and fighting through those proxies. Then Section 31 started increasingly co-opting Starfleet Special Forces for covert missions.

He had quit special forces after a classified mission went wrong and ended in the death of one of his team members. A supposedly humanitarian effort to deliver relief supplies to a village on one of the non-aligned worlds. The relief supplies were weapons. Sold by a Section 31 agent in return for building a black site for prisoners. They had turned him and his team into arms dealers and lied to them about it. Afterwards, using the respect he had earned along with his growing influence, Chris worked with others to strip Section 31 of its independence and force it under Starfleet and Federation Council oversight.

Was it possible Section 31 was behind the decision to keep Enterprise out of the Klingon war?

After that final mission, Leland joined Section 31. Chris planned to quit Starfleet until Captain Robert April convinced him to stay, that he was needed. Chris and Leland tried to maintain their friendship, but that proved difficult. Though still bound to the same oath, their principles had diverged too much. That reality hit Chris hard after Section 31’s actions against the Gorn Hegemony on Cestus III.

Yes, Leland and Section 31 had an agenda of their own and Spock was now in their crosshairs. Chris knew he had to get to Spock first.

Chapter Text

“Everyone at 31 thinks of it as a place where they make sense. Not in spite of who they are but because of it. They can be of service. They’re good people.” – Lieutenant Ash Tyler, Saints of Imperfection

Ash Tyler joined Captain Leland on the second floor of the Section 31 ship’s bridge. The ship, as most are, was a mirror reflection of its Captain, shadowed and gray. Steely. With sharp, hard, inflexible surfaces. Quiet. There was no wasted conversation, only murmured exchanges regarding the ship and their mission. The air was thick with grim and absolute determination.

Leland never used his ready room, preferring instead to remain in the nerve center of his ship, always alert, always watchful. This area overlooking the main stations provided limited privacy.

Tyler spoke first as he stood at attention. “Reporting as ordered sir.”

Leland greeted the young officer with a rare smile. He judged Tyler to be talented, skilled, and committed. Aching to serve in any capacity, perhaps out of guilt. Eager to feel he had a place to belong, to fit in. Tyler understood that threats were everywhere, and sometimes extreme measure were crucial. That there were no black and white solutions. He had faced a crucible of darkness, violation, loss and death, and kept going.

Tyler was a man who stared evil directly in the eye and choose to protect and serve. Just as Leland did. He admired that.

And reminded his Captain of another earnest officer, Alex, a brother-in-arms who had fallen years ago. That incident had changed Leland and set him on a different path. The younger, gregarious Leland had been the older sibling to everyone in that special ops group. All his teammates recognized he had an ego the size of the Sol System and the swager to match, still Leland was the one who took them on ‘seek out new opportunities’ benders after a break-up, the one who introduced the newbies to the pleasure of Risa stating, “It’s time to explore the galaxy, time to kiss and well more with, someone”, the one to whom they admitted their fears before a dangerous mission.

But Leland’s confidence often pushed him into recklessness. Sometimes with unfortunate results. His team leader possessed the strength of will required to keep Leland in bounds, but that friendship had splintered and never completely recovered. The two now served the same goals in separate organizations using vastly divergent methods.

Section 31 and Control believed Leland’s recklessness, over confidence, and ruthlessness were assets. And Leland intended to teach Tyler to cultivate those qualities within himself and to embrace his brashness, treat it as an asset.

Ash craved a mentor and a friend. He had thought his best path forward was serving the new Klingon Chancellor, but that path ended abruptly for the greater good. For the many. In both the Klingon Empire and the Federation. To safeguard the life of his son. So he had picked himself up once again, accepted his life was unalterably changed, and set about forging a new path serving the Federation. Looking for the warm friendship and professional satisfaction he experienced on Discovery before Voq was activated.

Section 31 welcomed him, Leland took Tyler under his wing, and it felt … good. Like a new home.

“At ease soldier. I apologize for the discomfort this will cause you, but I am assigning you to serve as my liaison to Captain Pike on Discovery. Your familiarity with the ship and her crew will be useful.” Leland explained as his gaze followed the officers working below.

That was a sharp punch to his gut. Yet if Leland asked, Tyler would serve with the best of his abilities. Even walk through fire, which he had literally done as Voq. “My comfort is immaterial sir. Thank you for trusting me with this role.”

Leland turned to face Tyler. “You carry my and Section 31’s full authority on that ship. There is no question Pike can refuse to answer, no request he can deny. Report everything directly and secretly to me. It is vital I, we, gain control of the situation before it spirals out of our hands and beyond containment.”

How could Section 31 claim any authority on a Starfleet ship? Ash thought. Especially one commanded by the flagship Captain? “Yes sir.” He responded swallowing the questions.

Leland chuckled, another rarity for him. But his tone of voice was serious, almost stern. “Pike is charismatic, hell, even I like kicking back with him over a drink. You cannot let that influence you.”

He searched Tyler’s face for a reaction, but it remained impassive. “There is no better man than Christopher Pike to have by your side in a fight. But there are lines he won’t cross. That’s dangerous and ineffective when facing a new enemy. His adherence to principles is his weakness and, as he is leading the effort to decipher the seven signals, dangerous to us. Your mission is to observe, report, and when ordered, do what is necessary. If you judge the unthinkable is required and there is no time to request guidance – do it. I will protect you.”

“I understand sir. And I won’t let you down.”

“Principles are nice clichés, inspiring in speeches and perhaps feasible, even sensible in a universe where everyone plays by the same rules. But they have little use in our daily reality. Always remember that.” Leland finished, his tone firm and emphatic.

That perspective felt … off … to Ash. But then covert ops performed a different role than Starfleet. One he in which he was a novice. And this wasn’t the time to question the man who was his superior and his training officer. “Yes sir, I will.”

“Don’t let me down. Grab your gear and report to the transporter room. Good hunting Lieutenant.”

Chapter Text

Ensign Tilly entered the bridge twenty minutes late for her assigned shift, her eyes focused on the floor, her hair pulled into an untidy bun, her uniform jacket’s collar unfastened. She sat at the science console without uttering a word. Commander Saru looked first in her direction and then at his Captain. Pike shook his head almost imperceptivity. The Kelpien acknowledged the directive with a nod.

It had been a week since the Discovery crew rescued Tilly after she was unwillingly stranded in the mycelial network by the entity she named May Ahearn.

Michael frowned at the back of her commander’s head. It’s too soon. Too soon to force Tilly back onto the bridge. Too soon for her to resume participating in the command training program. She had earnestly repeated the same mantra to Captain Pike yesterday. He had politely and attentively heard her plea for granting Tilly more time away from normal duties and its accompanying reasons before responding in a kind but firm tone, “Your concern is appropriate, noted and does you credit. But it is time.” That evening in their quarters when receiving her schedule for the following day Tilly remained quiet and stoic, as she had been since her ordeal. The resemblance to her estranged brother’s lack of emotional response was uncanny further unsettling Michael. She considered seeking out Pike again and demanding he rescind his instructions which were, in her opinion, unnecessary and cruel. Knowing it was unlikely the Captain would reconsider held her back. As did the image of Tilly’s dismay upon learning her roommate interfered despite the possibility of a reprimand. Michael was slowly learning when to fight a battle and when to walk away.

Unbeknownst to Michael, Staments, who in the aftermath of the incident was keeping Tilly close to his side in Engineering, assigning her light tasks satisfying the Ensign’s desire for isolation, had made an identical argument to their temporary Captain. The mycelial scientist’s urging was louder, with a directness bordering on insubordination. It was also politely and attentively heard in full before rejection.

Yesterday evening, after noting the Captain’s addendum to the day’s schedule assigning Tilly to the alpha Bridge shift, Saru had a quiet word with Pike who responded, “I agree Tilly’s not ready, in fact she’s losing ground, turning more inward as time passes. Which calls for a different approach before she loses confidence. Sometimes the best path forward is getting back in the saddle with the horse that threw you.” The Kelpien made a mental note to allocate time for learning more about the Earth mammal labeled horse, their temperament, their functions, and their interactions with humans, since his current commander made frequent use of metaphors featuring those mammals. Saru also put in a late-night call to Enterprise’s XO for further discussion; Commander Una suggested he embrace all things equine and try to avoid the subject when possible. Saru shared his former Captain’s love of centuries old theatrical movies and recurring television series and her frequent references to their supposed nuggets of wisdom; Una explained Philippa Georgiou adopted that particular habit from Enterprise’s current CMO, Phil Boyce. Much in Starfleet ran smoothly due to the unofficial yet extensive first officer’s network.

Once Tilly settled into her station, Saru relayed the day’s assignments. After a one-word response indicating she understood, the Ensign buried herself in the monitors and sensor readouts.

In deference to Saru, Pike limited his bridge time, only taking the chair when called or a situation demanded his close attention. This wasn’t unusual, on Enterprise he generally left the conn to the officer of the deck. Today he remained on the watch, observing Tilly throughout it. Pike missed her effervescence and spirited language. Her observations and questions, both of which were often impertinent. Her unique way of looking at the everyday and ordinary.

Casually, here and there, one at a time, her crewmates approached the science station and initiated conversation, keeping it light and confined to small talk. With apathetic facial gestures and the occasional one-word sentence, Tilly brushed them off. Scuttlebutt via the ship’s rumor mill confirmed she also avoided her friends when off-duty, adopting the habit of eating as she worked or taking a tray to her quarters. With each rejected offering today on the bridge, Tilly’s body language telegraphed growing weariness and her colleagues expressions grew increasing disheartened and bewildered.

At the end of the shift, Tilly bolted before her replacement arrived. Pike again waved off any rebuke. He turned the conn over to Saru before leaving for his ready room. Items requiring his attention littered the desk. Ignoring those, Pike took time for a favored activity, staring out of the window. The external view of the ship encased in a warp bubble with its swirling colors and streaking stars infallibly cheered, invigorated, calmed, and delighted him. I should have intervened sooner and nudged Tilly back into her routine. Now she needs more care and softer handling.

Pike tackled the mountain of work as he sorted through next steps for helping Tilly. Checking the time he decided it was too late today. Best give her more notice.

ooooo

That evening, while reviewing her messages, Tilly suddenly squealed and repeated, “Oh no, no, no, no.”

Michael looked up from the book she was reading. “What’s wrong? Can I help?”

Tilly sat by Michael at the table and pointed to a message on her PADD. “Do you think I’m in trouble?”

“No, you’d be summoned by Saru first.”

“But …” Tilly stopped, unsure and not knowing what to say next.

“Most consider such an invitation an honor.”

“But …”

Michael smiled reassuringly. “I’m sure it’s only for good. Maybe you’re getting a new assignment.”

“No, that would come through Saru as well.”

“A commendation?”

Tilly stared pointedly and incredulously at Michael.

“I give up. You’ll know tomorrow.”

“Maybe I should turn it down,” Tilly mused.

Michael raised an eyebrow. “That is not done.”

“I guess you’re right; I don’t want to insult him.” Tilly looked and sounded anxious. After an impulsive thought she added, “Come with me.”

“Not invited.”

“Yeah, who in their right mind crashes an invitation from their Captain, or turns it down … I have to go, don’t I?

Michael nodded her agreement. “Talk to Nhan tomorrow. Maybe Pike does this with all his officers on Enterprise and is starting with the newest one on Discovery.” This was the most Tilly had spoken on any subject since her rescue from the mycelial network. For Michael any conversation from Tilly was welcome and a balm for her worries.

“Good idea.” Tilly stared at the message again. It read: Please join me for dinner tomorrow night, 19:00, Captain’s dining room. Casual.

Chapter Text

The next morning Tilly waited impatiently in the mess hall for Commander Nhan. When the Enterprise officer turned Discovery security chief entered two hours later, Tilly energetically waved her over.

Pleased to see the young ensign out of her quarters and engaging with others after the incident in the mycelial network with the jahSepp, Nhan placed her tray on the table and sat opposite Tilly. “Good morning to you too. Are you on the bridge again today?”

“No, engineering. Which is why I wanted to find you before our shifts begin.”

“Okay. How can I help?”

Tilly swirled a fork through her untouched scrambled eggs. “I … I think I might be in trouble … Pike,” she quickly corrected, “Captain Pike that is … he … well … you’ve served under him longer than anyone on Discovery … and I thought you might know why … why he … suggested …” her voice trailed off.

“Yes? Go on.”

“That we … he and I that is … though there could be others … I just assumed … that we eat together this evening.” Tilly finished in a small voice.

“Captain’s dining room?” Nhan asked.

“Yes.”

The Barzan smiled hoping it would ease Tilly’s nervousness. “You’re not in trouble. I’ve never known the Captain to reprimand anyone outside of the ready room. And he rarely does in front of others unless the situation is critical and there is no other choice.”

“How likely is it that you know of every admonishment delivered by Captain Pike? Especially the private ones?” Tilly argued.

“Well, you have a point. But I believe you are overthinking the invitation.”

“Oh hell.” Tilly immediately added, “Sorry.”

“Relax. The Captain may be spending solo time with all the command trainees. Enterprise isn’t part of the program making this an unusual opportunity for him.”

Tilly’s brow creased as if deep in thought. “Have you spent time with him, outside of duty that is?”

“Here and there. Not frequently.”

“And?” Tilly prompted for the obvious.

“You will find the man and the commanding officer are much the same. Though … it’s good to remember no matter how informal the atmosphere or how relaxed he is, his still is and always will be Captain Pike.” Nhan continued in a quiet serious tone, “He is very private, and few are allowed past that personal line.”

“Oh hell,” Tilly repeated. “You said here and there. Would you tell me about the first time you interacted with the Captain off duty and one-on-one? I know it’s a personal question, but I want to be prepared.”

“I started on Enterprise in engineering …”

“Oh I remember,” Tilly interrupted, “Bryce said Captain Pike was beaming aboard with a science officer and an engineer. We assumed he misunderstood.”

“but learned my true calling is security. I hesitated and kept quiet because I needed additional training in order to transfer and didn’t want to lose my place on Enterprise. Captain Pike noticed my desire for a change. Over dinner, in that informal comfortable setting, he tried coaxing me into talking about it. I resisted, viewing it as my problem. Which was foolish. He already had a solution accommodating the seemingly mutually exclusive options.”

“You left and returned?”

“No. Six months later, after I requested a transfer to the Academy, Captain Pike and our security chief countered with their plan. One to remain on Enterprise and complete my training and examinations there. The Captain pointed out having a security officer with engineering skills was an ace in the hole for the crew; he’s a fan of cross-training. If I had responded to his outreach over dinner that evening rather than believing I had to sort all out on my own, I could have started my training earlier. Instead I left him with the impression I wanted to leave the ship.”

Tilly looked confused. “What should I take away from that?”

“Relax. There is no need to be guarded. Nothing you say or do will be held against you. If he offers assistance take it. This dinner is either a ‘I want to get to know my new crew member better,’ or the Captain has sensed you are in difficulty and in need of a little extra support and kindness.”

“Oh. I see.” Tilly’s expression brightened and her corners of her mouth slowly curled upward. “It’s an … opportunity.” Her smile beamed. “After all how many first-year ensigns dine privately with the legendary Captain Pike?”

Nhan shook her head. “He doesn’t care for that descriptor,” she cautioned before adding her agreement, “Not many.”

The security chief tried to interject, “Just be yourself, don’t dream up homework.” Instead Nhan heard Tilly muttering as she left the mess hall, “I’m friggin’ lucky.”

ooooo

The morning proved quiet and uneventful allowing Pike an earlier start than planned. He gathered the needed supplies from his quarters and the hydroponic bay. On the way to the galley, he indulged in a moment of fond homesickness for his own kitchen on Enterprise, built to his specifications during the last retrofit. A place where he could and did, for a few hours, shrug off the stripes and focus on an activity with an immediate and known pleasant outcome that, with the right technique and ingredients, he controlled. Busy captains rarely had time to indulge in a hobby.

Discovery’s sous-chef was bored. Sous-chefs were rare even on heavy cruisers and though smaller, Discovery possessed one. Crew used to the more spartan deep space and military ships held it up as yet another example of the luxury bestowed on science vessels. Lorca, for all his faults, at least ordered a perfectly cooked steak and other delicacies, Kofi thought. Instead I am stuck upgrading the replicators’ protein matrix. He looked up when the doors swished open and leisurely rose to attention. “How can I help Captain?”

Pike waved Kofi off. “At ease. Don’t mind me, go back to whatever you were working on. I have free time and am going to putter a bit.”

Kofi’s eyes grew to saucers. He stuttered, “Yyyou … you want to use my stuff?”

Suppressing a chuckle, Pike replied with a faint grin, “I do.”

“And on Enterprise … I mean … they let you? Cook that is?” Kofi’s tone of voice echoed his disbelief and his horror at an untrained commander loosed in his galley.

Pike gave up trying to hide amusement. “They do, from time to time … with careful supervision. So far Enterprise remains intact.”

“I beg to differ … sir. Your other ship is in dry dock as we speak,” Kofi countered as he began discreetly shuffling knives out of reach.

“True,” Pike flashed the dimples, “but that wasn’t my fault.”

Kofi’s skepticism remained unfazed.

“I promise I’ll keep out of your way,” Pike replied soothingly. He placed two bags on the counter and begin sorting through the ingredients. “Just going to whip up a couple of easy things.”

After moving his chair allowing for Pike’s actions to be in view at all times, Kofi mumbled weakly, “Yes sir.”

Chapter Text

Kofi’s interest piqued watching Pike unload the bags he brought to the galley – avocados, garlic, onions, fennel, mushrooms, carrots, celery, potatoes, cauliflower, green beans, apples, tomatoes, kuri squash, peppers of assorted colors and heat indices, fresh herbs, and a stasis box. “Sir, I’d be pleased to prepare anything you wish,” Kofi offered hoping to discourage their commander from continuing on his own.

“Yes, and one day I will take advantage of your offer and services,” Pike answered. “The hydroponics bay is impressive, especially for ship this size,” he remarked as he double checked the ingredients.

“Our botanist, Commander Jordan will be pleased you noticed,” Kofi replied.

“I’ll be sure to send her note with my appreciation,” Pike stated as he opened the statis box.

Kofi leaned in, curiosity overriding his stern expression. “Is that masa?”

“Replicators cannot produce decent corn meal or maize dough,” Pike said absentmindedly as he picked through bags and containers. He held up one, “Heirloom blue corn meal. The seeds have been passed down for over two hundred years.” The box also contained various spices and cheeses.

“But … but … you live on energy bars, coffee, apples, and replicated salads …”

Pike grinned. “Yeah. I am scolded for that frequently. It’s not a reflection on you or your skills. The crew deserve the best and I prefer your time and talents be in service to that.”

“Most days your choices from the replicator are … are …”

“Indicative of no damn palate whatsoever?” Pike queried. He added with a chuckle, “As Enterprise’s chef pronounces.”

“Ah, yes sir.”

“You may drop the sirs in here.” Pike then explained. “Most of my days are crowded, too crowded for more than a quick necessary meal. Here and there, once in a blue moon as my father would say, I take the time and indulge.” He searched the drawers for knives, the cupboards for a cutting board. “I need a paring and chef’s knife.”

“Uh, OK.” Kofi rummaged through a drawer. With visions of Dr. Pollard delivering a heated lecture after reattaching the Captain’s fingertip, the sous chef handed over the dullest knives he possessed. The ones he reserved for Discovery’s head chef, a technocrat who was a wizard with protein matrices but a clumsy cook. “Do you know how to use them properly?”

“Well enough to avoid incurring our Dr. Pollard’s wrath,” Pike assured as if he had read his crewman’s mind.

“We’ll see,” Kofi muttered under his breath.

Pike managed getting the vegetable broth started since the ingredients for that required only a rough chop. Peeling the squash proved impossible with the equivalent of a child’s toy. “Kofi, the big kids’ tools please,” he prompted with a dimpled smile.

Grudgingly, the sous chef handed over a recently sharpened chef’s knife and two different sized smaller ones.

“Thanks.”

Kofi watched cautiously, ready to intervene and wrap a cloth around any deep cuts. Slowly he relaxed and eventually conceded his new Captain’s knife skills rival any professionally trained chef. And are almost as good as my own, Kofi finally admitted to himself.

“Ah, Captain? The heat source under that broth is too high,” Kofi said.

Pike raised a quizzical eyebrow as he sliced and deseeded diverse types of peppers.

“Anything other than a slow simmer will extract the flavors too fast. The broth will take on an unpalatable edge and lose its nuance,” Kofi explained.

“Excellent advice, there is always something to learn.”

“And you should start skimming the foam off now,” Kofi advised further then jumped to his feet. “I’ll take care of it while you finish.”

“But …” Pike began. You’re a guest in his domain, he thought, accept the help. They worked in silence. Pike arranged the various mounds of prepped vegetables and herbs in the order each was needed as well as the oils and spices. With the corn meals and other dry and wet ingredients in place, he started on the necessary doughs.

Kofi’s discriminating eye evaluated his commander’s work area. A credible mise en place, he mused. He’s clearly an amateur, still it’s a solid effort. He reached for the oils, salt, pepper, and cilantro and switched them from the left explaining, “You’re right-handed, essentials on the dominant side. Trust me, the rhythm will be more natural and efficient.”

“Okay,” Pike responded in a friendly tone. He assembled sheet pans with vegetables and the saved squash seeds.

“You’re not going to roast the garlic like that are you?” Kofi pointed to the packaged head with a horrified expression.

“Excuse me?”

Kofi continued, waving his arms, and gesturing emphatically, “Wrapped generates too much moisture! You’ll get sweet mush but no crackly bits.” He pulled out a cast iron skillet. “Here. The heat induction is better in this. Slice through the middle of the head, place with the sliced portion facing up and then drizzle generously with olive oil. Trust me, it’s a whole new level.”

“Why Starfleet?” Pike inquired as he started over with the garlic.

“You mean why signup and go through the grueling basic training required for those not attending the Academy?”

“Not exactly but continue.” An experienced leader, Pike understood how a question was interpreted said as much or more than the provided answer.

Kofi sighed dramatically and pressed a hand to his chest. “An affaire de coeur; I followed my love believing we could not bear to be parted. Turns out she decided we could. Then I landed on Discovery and … liked it.” What is it about this Captain, he asked himself, what is it that encourages sharing confidences?

“So you are staying? I read your original two-year commitment ends next month.”

“I intend following Discovery and her crew wherever they go,” Kofi confirmed emphatically. His mouth curved into a wicked grin, “Unless the next Captain shoots me into space for insubordination. But then someone has to keep y’all in line and down to earth, metaphorically that is.”

Pike chuckled. Using a portion of the now finished vegetable broth he added tomatoes, masa, peppers, and various spices.

Kofi peered over his shoulder and sniffed. “Wait, that’s cinnamon, that’s allspice, and that’s cumin … are you making a mole?”

“A quick one yes. There’s no time for spending 2-3 days on a …” Pike started.

“On a proper one,” Kofi finished in an approving tone.

“Yeah.” Pike agreed with a sideways grin. He moved on to his next task.

“Oh no, no, no, no, no. Please tell me this is not what I am seeing. You cannot braise mushrooms in that way!” Kofi pushed his way to the stove top. “Allow me. Observe and learn the proper way.”

“If you insist,” Pike said with a hint of annoyance in his tone of voice.

“Who taught you to cook?”

“My father, he’s a believer in self-sufficiency,” Pike replied.

“Mine too, taught me to cook that is, though his enticement was ‘cooks get all the mad …”

“Yes …” Pike interjected, “I get the reference. My father pointed that out as well, with different phrasing.”

Kofi grinned. “My father wasn’t known for his tact, or his subtlety. And while we are on the subject.”

Pike groaned inwardly.

“The trending topic on the ship’s media is you, or to be more specific, your love life. It’s also inspired the muse of several writers on board. There’s one story that contains, as Tilly pronounced, five things every boy should know. Care to substantiate the rumors?”

“Not really, no.”

Kofi shook his head. “Not even a teaser? Throw us a bone. Even a little one.”

His Captain answered the plea with an enigmatic smile.

Unwilling to concede, Kofi continued, “With all its noble captains roaming the stars, how does Starfleet make little captains? He studied his commander’s expression. “I surmise you may be considering taking that shooting me into space comment a bit too literally. Perhaps I should resume beta testing protein matrices?”

“A wise plan.”

Twenty minutes later Pike noticed Kofi squirming in his chair. “You have a suggestion?”

Kofi nodded. “For the soup, the squash soup with the ancho pepper and apple? Sprinkle a little dried chamomile on top. The slight bitterness will complement the heat of the pepper and sweetness of the fruit.”

“I may steal that idea for several other dishes as well.” Pike opened the stasis unit and removed green leaves.

“Are those banana leaves?”

“Yes,” Pike confirmed. Anticipating the next question he added, “For steaming the tamales.”

“I’m commandeering that technique. And I am envious of your stasis box.”

Taking the baked apples out of the oven, Pike immediately placed them in a force field to maintain their temperature. “That’s it,” he said as he assembled the tray of dishes.

“The quarter master called. Captain’s dining room has been reconfigured to your specifications,” Kofi reported.

“Excellent. I’m pleased you’ve chosen to stay in Starfleet.” Pike turned to leave.

“Captain?”

Facing Kofi, Pike said, “Yes?”

“Welcome on board sir.”

The Captain nodded his thanks. The door opened.

“Wait, sir … you forgot this …” Kofi reached for Pike’s stasis box.

“Keep it,” Pike said as the doors to the galley closed.

ooooo

“Oh, damn, damn, damn, double damn. I’m going to be late,” Tilly said aloud in her empty quarters where she stood clad in bra and panties sorting through the heap of clothes covering her bed. “What do you wear for a casual Friday dinner date with ... No, no strike that. Stop fantasizing before you embarrass yourself,” she admonished sternly. “I mean casual Friday dinner with the boss.”

Her civilian clothes and Michael’s, as well as her dress uniform, lay on the bed in unorganized unfolded chaos. “I wonder if Michael’s things have ever been in this state?”

She started tossing items on the floor as she pieced through them. “Too dressy. Too casual. Too plaid. Too Vulcan. Too reveal … wait … maybe … no … too revealing. I need to channel …” She thought through her childhood idols. “Too Newtonian. Too nerdy. Too high schoolish. Yes. That’s it. Understated yet elegant. Casual yet refined. Perfect.”

Tilly dressed in a black knit turtleneck and khaki pants. She pinned her hair into a neat bun near her neckline, a headband kept escaping tendrils around her face securely in place. Channeling her inner Carolyn Bessette Kennedy bestowed confidence. With topics of conversation index cards fully memorized, she left for the Captain’s dining room.

Chapter Text

Tilly arrived five minutes after the appointed time, slightly winded. The tendrils of hair she meticulously tamed with a headband escaping and frizzing from the slight sheen on her face. She rushed through the door and abruptly halted. Her eyes methodically catalogued the room as words tumbled out, “Sorry … I’ve never been in the Captain’s dining room before … but … its sooo not what I expected.”

Pike rose from the table as soon as Tilly entered. Out of uniform and dressed casually in a dark grey shirt and black pants he looked younger.

As usual Tilly blurted out the first thought in her head, “Does your hair ever stray out of place? Or do you keep it encased in a forcefield?” Several evocative possibilities for dislodging his coif jumped into her head. Stop that right now! Focus! she thought.

He smiled, dimples beaming, “Hmmm. I’ve never noticed.

Every Captain should be issued a set of dimples for cheering the crew during low moments, Tilly decided. Unconsciously she smoothed her own hair.

He gestured to one of the thin pillows on the floor in front of a low wooden table carefully sanded until its surface felt like silk. The table was rectangular with its long side sitting perpendicular to a viewport which spanned floor to ceiling. Once Tilly was settled, Pike sat opposite her, legs crossed. “To answer your earlier question, or rather statement, I had the room reconfigured.”

“Why?”

“Due to physiological as well as other reasons, the posture required when sitting on the floor like this calms and relaxes. And it’s a good leveler.” He held her gaze, his blue eyes dancing with amusement, “It’s hard to be nervous about spending one-on-one time with a higher ranked officer when both are essentially in a yoga pose.”

She laughed. “True.” The outside scene caught her attention and her eyes widened. “Down here I feel like I am riding on the stars, literally. It’s mesmerizing. We should stop more often and take the time to sit on the floor and watch the stars sail past.”

“Yeah. Enterprise’s viewports are much smaller and less numerous. This is truly luxurious.”

Her eyes roamed the dishes arrayed on the table. Pike explained, “Not familiar with your preferences, I brought a few of my favorites.”

“It’s autumn at home, I mean on Earth if you live in the northern hemisphere. This is nice, the colors and vegetable choices remind me of that. Kofi really outdid himself.”

Pike’s expression did not change. He didn’t miss a beat. Pointing to each dish in turn he enumerated the choices. “Roasted garlic guacamole …”

Tilly dipped a chip into the bowl and added all the accompanying separate garnishes – queso fresco, toasted pumpkin seeds and pickled jalapenos. After a bite she nodded enthusiastically.

“Squash, ancho pepper, and apple soup … roasted cauliflower, poblano, and caramelized onion tacos … potatoes, grilled fennel and portobello mushrooms in yellow mole … green beans with chives and olive oil … sweet corn tamales filled with roasted poblanos, crema and cheese … a mild tomato habanero sauce, and roasted apples with mezcal and a salsa of chiles, black walnuts, oil, honey, and vinegar,” Pike finished.

As she nibbled, Tilly’s nervous energy ebbed and the quiet, haunted, distanced Sylvia of the past week surfaced. Pike let her set the pace of their conversation including the lack of it.

“You grew up in the American southwest, didn’t you?” she asked.

“Near Mojave in California.”

She nodded. “I remember that from your file. Sorry about displaying it to everyone by the way.”

“Not only was that of no consequence, but it also helped me push folks past an awkward situation. From a different perspective your inadvertent mistake was inspired,” he replied.

Pike’s careful word selection of ‘a different perspective,’ its symbolism and other applications, were not lost on her. They lapsed back into silence.

“I’m sorry … you know … for all the trouble I caused,” Tilly admitted in a small, quiet voice.

Looking at her Pike deadpanned, “Which time?”

Tilly sputtered. “Ex … ex … excuse me?” She narrowed her eyes and declared, “That wasn’t very Captain Pikeian of you.”

“Meaning?”

“Warm and fuzzy of course. Like a favored, worn out, stuffed animal.”

He scratched his chin using the motion as a distraction from his barely contained amusement.

Her hand flew to her mouth, covering it. “Oh no, I didn’t mean you are past it … damn, maybe sitting on the floor makes me a little too casual. Double damn, now I am cursing.” Tilly paused and took a breath. “Worn as in making one feel safe, not worn as in tattered. There I go again. Moving on, you were teasing me, weren’t you?”

Pike nodded and backed that up with words. “Yes. To break the ice a little so to speak.”

She sighed. “Ice I have just smashed into tiny pieces with a sledgehammer.”

He nodded again this time permitting a small chuckle. “Not one of us would have you be any other way.” His expression turned serious. “I get that what you went through in the mycelial network was tough. And it will take time to assimilate the experiences and feel better. Your crewmates, your friends, don’t shut them out. Their help will be valuable in this process.”

“Are you disappointed? In me? In having to risk the ship to retrieve me?” Her small tone of voice returned

“No. Are you … concerned about the risks your crewmates took in order to rescue you?”

“What if … what if everyone on board had died trying to help me? How could I ever live with that?”

“A big question which has no clear-cut answer. And no one else can solve it for you. They didn’t. Which is the important bit. The piece you focus on today, tomorrow, and the next day,” Pike said.

Tilly remained quiet for ten minutes.

“Indulge me in offering my point of view?” Pike asked.

“Okay.”

“You kept to your oath. You held no grudges. You aided those who abducted you. Those efforts, along with those of your crewmates who were upholding their own Starfleet oaths, healed the mycelial network, safeguarded the jahSepp, and rescued Commander Culber.”

“Pretty friggin’ amazing were we not?” Tilly replied with a faint smile.

“A successful day at the office,” he agreed before continuing. “Dealing with the first time others risk their lives solely for you is a tall fence to jump.”

“Commander Nhan warned us about the horseback riding metaphors.”

Pike grinned. “I do have a reputation to maintain.” His smile faded. “But I think something else is bothering you as well. Something more. Care to talk about it?”

Tilly shook her head. “Not really, no.”

“Okay. Coffee with the dessert?”

“Yes please. Though Dr. Pollard has made it known throughout the ship you are restricted to decaf after 1:00 pm.”

“The good doctor believes overconsumption of caffeine is a factor in my ‘propensity for foolish choices’ are I believe her exact words.” Pike added after retrieving two mugs from the replicator, “And therefore this will remain a secret between you and I.”

“That means you owe me one, doesn’t it?”

“Let’s not get carried away. Tell me about your time at the Academy. What were your favorite classes?”

Familiar territory was a balm for Tilly, and she happily launched into a chronological listing of and exposition on her favored studies which turned out to be every subject in the curriculum, every class she enrolled in. Pike listened with an unhurried manner, giving the young officer his complete attention, asking relevant questions as she talked.

“… even my mother was proud of me when my talent for theoretical engineering got noticed and led to an early appointment to a starship. And trust me, my making my mother happy about anything is rare …” Tilly’s voice drifted off. “But …” again she stopped. “In the end … my talent … my work … I didn’t know … it hurt …”

There it is, Pike thought. “Hurt?” he prompted.

The explanation came out in a rush. “I helped open the door to the mycelial network. If I … if we hadn’t … the jahSepp would never have been in danger. The price for the spore drive, something that we were so pleased with, so proud of, that was an asset during the Klingon war could have been … unspeakably high. And I was a part of that harm … I don’t trust myself … what if my next idea or plan destroys someone or something or … an entire race! Given the decisions required of you, how do you bear the responsibilities of being a captain? Maybe it’s not for me.”

Pike set the mug of coffee he was sipping on the table. It was his third cup. “And if I told you it is not possible to know every potential repercussion before proceeding? That at times the best you can do is attempt to correct or unwind the consequences? That in spite of that taking responsible chances, ones carefully considered, is needed?”

“I’d be bummed,” Tilly said with honesty.

“Then I won’t say it.”

“And I would compliment you on the impromptu yet well executed alliterations,” Tilly pointed out.

“Effect is not always within your control. Intent is. That’s like … I cannot think of an illustrative horse metaphor for this one … which will also remain our secret.”

Tilly giggled.

Pike continued, “So I’ll use an equally obscure reference which is a favorite of my CMO on Enterprise, that’s the ballgame. Intent matters.” He checked the clock. “You have an early bridge shift. Go get some rest.”

“Yes sir. Thank you for dinner. It wasn’t nearly as scary as I expected. Wait, that didn’t come out right.”

“No matter, I get what you meant.”

Tilly turned back from the door. “You know, when I imagined you in civies,” her hand gestured up and down, “it was very different. There was a lot of plaid. And flannel. Goodnight.” She quickly left before accidently saying aloud, like a sexy lumberjack, have you considered growing a beard?