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Don't Know Where To Go

Summary:

The air was still, flakes of dust floating in the sunlight that shined in through the windows. Julie closed the studio door behind her and walked through the studio to see if Reggie was still there. His bass was left lying on the floor by his microphone abandon, which made Julie frown, suddenly much more worried for her bandmate than she had been originally.

Or

Another Luke-and-Alex-fight fic but this time it's from Julie's POV and Reggie goes missing afterwards. Also super duper angsty and whumpy

Notes:

I hope you guys enjoy this one! I wrote this while having writer's block so it's not exactly the best thing ever but I had fun torturing Reggie from another character's POV. I feel like Reggie is just such a whumpable character, I really can't help myself.

Title is from the song: I Don't Know Where To Go from the musical Lizard Boy, which has taken over my life almost as much as JaTP has.

Enjoy!

~ R

Work Text:

| Broken Down |

 

Julie thought Reggie was going to poof in late during their gig, make a cheeky comment, then finish out the show with them. What she didn’t expect was Reggie ditching the show in its entirety. Judging by the concerned looks Luke and Alex exchanged with each other they didn’t know where Reggie was either. They played through the gig, Luke taking the lead guitar and Alex trying to keep with the beat. It wasn’t the worst they’ve played, but it definitely wasn’t their best. After their show Julie went straight to the side room the bar let them use as a green room before their set. Alex and Luke both poofed in, looking as lost as Julie felt. “Where’s Reggie?” Julie asked, worried and concerned for her friend, for her brother . Luke shook his head,

 

“I don’t know, the three of us poofed out of the studio at the same time. He should be here.” Alex cleared his throat to gain their attention. Julie turned to look at him as he shifted his eyes at Luke. Suddenly sensing the awkward tension in the air between her boys Julie crossed her arms and glared at them. Their performance felt off with Reggie missing, and now something was going on between Alex and Luke. Reggie was missing , they didn’t have time for petty arguments.

 

“Did you two do something to Reggie? You know he’s just as important to this band as you are,” she said half-scolding them. Luke’s kicked puppy dog expression was turned up to the max. Deciding the guitarist wasn’t going to be any help Julie turned to Alex. “Something happened between you three after I left for the show, didn’t it?” She asked, trying to figure out why Luke took a step away from Alex, instead of towards him. Alex glanced at Luke, who shook his head. Sighing Alex said,

 

“Luke, she needs to know. You said you’d tell her this week.” Julie frowned slightly. Was it Caleb again? Maybe they’re going to crossover, maybe Luke’s sick… Julie’s rushed, crowded thoughts filled her mind to the point where Luke had to snap his fingers together in order to get her attention again. Julie blinked, then let Luke pull her in for a hug, she melted into his chest.

 

“Everything is okay… sort of,” Luke said as he ran his fingers through Julie’s hair. The notion was calming, but it wasn’t enough. She was still worried about trying to find Reggie. Alex cleared his throat and pointedly looked at Luke saying,

 

“Right before the gig Luke and I got into a fight. We didn’t realize Reggie was still in the room and he heard us.” Julie looked up at Luke, who’s guilt was written across his face. She didn’t know her boy’s whole history yet, but Reggie was the important factor here. Julie had to clear it up before things got worse and Reggie went missing for good.

 

“What were you guys fighting about?” She asked, wondering what caused them to fight right before a gig. Luke hesitated, and to her surprise Alex nodded at him with a supportive smile, like he knew what Luke was going to say to her.

 

“Julie, you know how Alex is gay?” Luke started, staring at the drummer. Julie glanced at Alex before nodding in response.

 

“Yeah, what does that have to do with anything?” She asked, wondering what Luke was getting at. Luke took a shuddering breath, and Julie suddenly realized what was happening a split second before he said the words.

 

“Julie, I’m bisexual, and Alex and I are exes,” he said, words rushed and stuttering over each other. Julie let out a soft chuckle and reached up to cup Luke’s face. Luke looked confused, but didn’t pull away from her touch. “We were fighting over who should’ve taken the solo for today and it got intense.” Julie glanced between her boys,

 

“Thank you for trusting me with that Luke,” she said. A beat of silence passed then, “you’re okay now though, right?” She asked, scanning both of their faces to see if they were lying. Alex nodded,

 

“Yeah we’re okay now. Reggie doesn’t have a lot of good memories associated with people yelling though…” he trailed off. Alex looked like he was lost in haunted memories, none that were good. Luke sighed heavily, like he half-expected for Reggie to go missing after their fight. Luke ran a hand through his hair as he said,

 

“We should check the bike shack and the Orpheum. Julie, are you good with waiting in the studio in case he went back there?” Figuring that plan made the most sense Julie nodded, and the three of them gave each other a hug before Alex and Luke poofed out of the room to search for their missing bandmate.

 

Julie got back to her house half an hour later, her dad had been at the gig recording new footage for another YouTube video. She peeked her head into the studio, but it didn’t look like anyone was in it. The air was still, flakes of dust floating in the sunlight that shined in through the windows. Julie closed the studio door behind her and walked through the studio to see if Reggie was still there. His bass was left lying on the floor by his microphone abandon, which made Julie frown, suddenly much more worried for her bandmate than she had been originally.

 

Typically the boys treated their instruments like they were their children. Not that she blamed them. It was odd seeing the bass discarded so thoughtlessly. She picked it up and set it on it’s usual stand, to the left of Alex’s drums. “Reggie! Are you here?” Julie called out, not getting a response. She climbed the ladder to the loft, the wooden planks cracking under her. When she got to the landing she didn’t see Reggie anywhere. The thing that caught her eye though, was his abandoned flannel lying on a couple of trash bags. Where the hell did you go ? Julie thought, worry starting to weave into her mind. She reached forward and wrapped her fingers around the soft fabric. Clutching it tightly to her chest Julie climbed back down the loft stairs. She circled the studio again, but this time when she passed the bathroom she noticed the sliver of a shadow pass by the doorway. She hesitated, then heard someone whispering inside of the bathroom.

 

Stop ,” Reggie’s voice said, pleaded, floating through the closed door. Julie’s heart filled with pain at how hurt, how broken he sounded. “Stop, stop stop !” A crashing sound from the bathroom made Julie jump in shock. She reached forward to twist open the doorknob, but it was locked. Reggie let out a yelp in surprise and the sound of the shower curtain falling down made Julie cringe in sympathy. After deciding trying to get into the bathroom wasn’t going to work, Julie settled for sitting against the door, leaning her back against it.

 

“Reggie are you in there?” She asked softly, trying not to rattle him anymore than he already was. Her response was once again, silence. She could make out the sound of Reggie’s shallow breathing, and took it as a win. Sinking to the floor Julie leaned her back against the bathroom door. The silence they settled into wasn’t awkward, more… unsettling. Julie could hear Reggie through the door, his rushed, muttering sentences. She made out some of it, picking out concerning words like belt, and dad stop . Trying to curb the sudden rising anger she felt towards Reggie’s parents aside Julie took a deep breath. “You know, Alex and Luke are sorry they yelled at each other in front of you. They’re really scared, we thought you went back to Caleb.” Reggie’s anxious pacing stopped and Julie heard the door creak as Reggie sunk against it. At least he’s not panicking anymore, Julie thought.

 

“I didn’t have anywhere else to go...” Reggie said quietly. “Everything just got so loud… ” It was loud enough for Julie to pick up on and she made a mental note to find his parents so she could punch them in the face. “I know Luke and Alex would never hurt me, but I got scared… I’m sorry I missed the gig,” Reggie said, voice scratchy and dry. Julie cringed in sympathy, he definitely wouldn’t be able to sing for the rest of the day.

 

“I don’t care that you missed the gig. I was worried Caleb got to you, or you crossed over and couldn’t tell us. I was scared for you Reggie,” Julie said hoping she was saying the right thing. She turned around and rested her forehead on the bathroom door, trying the doorknob again, only to find it still locked. Luke and Alex poofed into the studio, both drenched in sweat from searching for Reggie all over the city. Luke opened his mouth to talk, but Julie shot him a glare to silence. She pointed her thumb at the bathroom door and a look of realization crossed Alex’s face.

 

“How long has he been in there?” Luke whispered as Julie pulled them away from the door. Julie didn’t understand the importance of Reggie holding himself up in the bathroom, but she could tell something was hurting her boys. “Julie, how long?” Luke asked when she didn’t answer. She hesitated then shrugged,

 

“I don’t know.” Luke looked like he was getting worked up,  He was in there when I got back… I think. He said something about a belt and his dad.” She paused, suddenly uncomfortable in her own skin. “Luke, what’s going on?” Julie asked, hoping for answers. Instead of talking to her though, Luke rushed to the bathroom door knocking a specific-sounding pattern against the old wood. She looked to Alex for help, who whispered,

 

“Reggie didn’t exactly have the best home life. They had secret knocks for all different kinds of situations.” That sort of helped… but not really. Alex didn’t offer anymore information though, instead focusing his attention on Luke. Julie hung back as Alex and Luke tried talking to Reggie through the bathroom door.

 

“Reggie, buddy,” Luke said after nothing happened. “Come on, give me a sign of life. You aren’t making it easy on me.” Julie waited in bated breath, then three slow knocks answered Luke. “Alex and I are so sorry you know that, right?” Luke asked as he sunk against the bathroom door. Julie watched Luke curiously, she’d never seen the songwriter act so… carefully before. It was like Luke was treating Reggie like a stray dog, slow calm words, like Reggie would get spooked and run away if he talked at a louder decibel. “You still with us?” Luke asked, receiving another knock from Reggie in response. “Good,” Luke said, breathing a sigh of relief. “How does unlocking the bathroom door sound? You left your flannel out here,” as if on cue Alex grabbed the flannel from Julie and tossed it at Luke. “Let us help you Reg, we’re here to keep you safe. You know that.” Then slowly, almost methodically, the doorknob twisted from the inside and the sound of the lock clicking echoed in the studio. The door creaked on it’s hinge as Reggie opened it a crack, barely large enough for his shoe to stick through it.

 

“Luke?” Reggie wondered, eyes unfocused and darting around the room. Julie’s heart broke for her boy, he sounded so hopeless, distant. His eyes were bloodshot and his hands were shaking uncontrollably. Luke didn’t seem to care about any of that though, judging by the look of pure relief that was on his face. Julie watched as The second the door cracked open, Luke pulled Reggie out of the bathroom and swung the flannel across his back. “Hi,” Reggie said softly as he pulled his flannel tighter around his shoulders, falling into Luke’s open arms. 

 

“It’s okay,” Luke soothed as he looked at Julie and Alex over Reggie’s head. “You’re okay, you aren’t there anymore. He can’t hurt you, not anymore.” Alex crossed the room next, sandwiching Reggie from behind, running his hand through his hair. Reggie’s body shook, and Julie could tell he was sobbing. Julie was itching to comfort the three of them, her band, her boys needed her. She just… didn’t want to risk overstepping boundaries. Especially after she spent so long drilling them into her boy’s head. Alex met Julie’s eyes and nodded. Julie cleared the floor in a few short strides and wrapped her arms around Reggie’s waist. Reggie let out a soft chuckle, and turned to bury his head in her hair.

 

“I’m sorry I scared you,” Reggie muttered as tears started to roll down Julie’s cheek. She sniffled and wiped her eyes on his flannel. Reggie made a noise of disgust and tried to wipe Julie’s snot off on Alex’s shirt, who dodged out of his reach. Luke exchanged a look with Alex then said,

 

“We’re the ones who should apologize Reggie. We shouldn’t have fought so loudly…” Alex let out a cough then corrected Luke, not letting him get off that easily.

 

“We shouldn’t have fought at all. We were being foolish,” Alex said as Reggie’s shaking started to slow down. Julie dropped onto the floor and her boys followed her lead, with Reggie sinking into Luke’s arms in the middle of them all. Julie reached out and started to play with Reggie’s fingers, the motion proving to be as calming as she hoped it would. Alex settled into a criss-crossed position on Reggie’s right side. “Forgive us?” Alex asked, puppy dog eyes fully activated. Reggie let out a short chuckle, then nodded.

 

“Of course I forgive you two, brothers, right?” Reggie asked as Luke started humming a slow song Julie didn’t recognize. It seemed to do the trick though, and Reggie relaxed completely in their arms. Julie caught on to the melody Luke was singing, and joined in with him. It was slow, calming, and repetitive. Soon enough, Reggie’s entire body went lax as he fell asleep in Luke and Julie’s embrace.

 

“When we were kids… his dad hit him. He thought we didn’t know but we knew,” Luke said once he was certain Reggie was asleep. Julie narrowed her eyes,

 

“Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t hunt down his father and destroy him for everything he’s worth.” Alex sighed, then ran a hand through Reggie’s hair. Reggie made a quiet noise of content, a cross between a cat’s mewl and something equally adorable.

 

“Because he doesn’t want us to,” Alex said nodding at Reggie’s sleeping form. Julie had never seen the bassist so relaxed, every single wrinkle in his forehead gone. No signs of stress or anxiety anywhere. Julie begrudgingly settled her head into Alex’s chest.

 

“That’s dumb,” she said grumpily. Luke snorted a laugh, then his expression turned somber. He took up Alex’s task and wrapped his fingers in Reggie’s hair. “But fine. If he doesn’t want to go after the bastard I won’t. I just want him to be happy.” Julie said, suddenly feeling her own eyes grow heavier as Alex started braiding her hair.

 

“He is happy Jules, you made that happen… Welcoming him into your family with open arms, being a sister. The closest thing he had to a real family was us,” Alex said softly. Julie turned her head in Alex’s lap to look up at Luke, who looked happy. Julie hummed then said,

 

“You’re my family too Alex.” Alex let out a stuttering sound.

 

“I think you broke Alex,” Luke said with a light laugh. Alex reached over Julie’s head and smacked Luke’s bare shoulder. Luke glared at Alex, but couldn’t attack back due to Reggie burrowing his head into his chest. Julie grinned as Luke’s grumpy puppy look dropped on his face.

 

“Everyone deserves a family guys,” Julie said as her eyelids started to grow heavier. Maybe her eyes were playing tricks on her, but Alex and Luke’s eyes shined with hope. Reggie grumbled in his sleep while he turned onto his side.

 

“Shut up, we all love each other. I’m trying to sleep,” Reggie muttered, wrapping his arms tightly around Luke’s. Luke tried to pry himself out of Reggie’s grasp, but failed epically. Giving up on his venture, Luke just settled back against the couch. With a light chuckle Julie said,

 

“Alright but you three do know I’m serious about this, right?” She asked, reaching a hand up to push a few loose strands of hair out of Reggie’s face. Reggie opened his eyes as he nodded. The hint of a small smile curled at the corner of his lips.

 

“Yeah Jules, I know you were serious.” Reggie said, eyes fluttering shut again. Luke picked up the song, continuing where he let off. His voice wrapped around Julie like a warm blanket, weaving into her mind. A silent promise that he’ll keep her and Reggie safe from any demons sent to haunt them during the night.