Chapter Text
"Don't touch my fucking radio!"
"Your music sucks."
"Okay? What do you want me to do about it, princess?"
"Change it. Which is exactly what I'm doing. So please focus on the road like a Good Samaritan."
"Icyhot, I will push you out of this goddamn car."
Izuku watched his two best friends, Katsuki and Shouto argue like they always did. And usually, he's able to deal with it, but not while Katsuki is driving. Not in a situation where distractions equal an instantaneous, fiery death or a writhing, seemingly nonending one. Personally, Izuku would rather not experience either one. If Katsuki did so happen to swerve off the road and break his car and not the people in it, they'd be left stranded to walk home because they were currently driving on a narrow dirt road surrounded by a field of wheat. The worst part about that hypothetical situation is that it is pitch black outside. Izuku was up for not a single one of those very probable situations.
"Maybe you should pay attention to the road," Izuku piped up. His voice went unheard, the two's argument overpowering Izuku's timid voice.
"Push me out of this car and I'm suing," Shouto promised, turning his nose up.
"Can't sue when you're six feet under," Katsuki mocked.
"So now you're threatening to kill me?"
"No. When you get pushed out of a moving car, there is a high chance of you dying," He explained, glancing at Shouto. "Not saying I'm gonna kill you. Just when I push you out the car, there's a high chance of you dying."
"Well, that's your plea. Mine will be incredibly more effective!" Shouto crossed his arms with a "hmph".
Izuku hid his face in his hands, peeking out between his fingers. His heart rate was unhealthy for someone his age. "Guys, there's not going to be any suing when we all die!"
Katsuki looked at him through the rearview mirror with an unamused stare. "Deku, calm down. I'm a good driver."
"He's an expert, Izuku. He got his licenses just yesterday!" Shouto sympathetically said, sarcasm lacing his voice.
"I could've easily left you on the side of the fucking road to rot."
Izuku's palms were getting sweaty against his face. He should've never gotten into the car with them. The two of them together always spelled out trouble. Izuku couldn't remember a single time Katsuki and Shouto were civil with each other or in general. One day they were going for each other's throats, the next, they were all buddy-buddy, causing a problem for someone else.
"We're gonna die," Izuku muttered to himself. He leaned back against his seat and suddenly wished he would've gone to church. Now God couldn't even save him.
Izuku was pulled from his worrisome thoughts when he heard Katsuki curse. The car skidded to the side, a loud thud emitting from outside the car. Everyone was deathly quiet for what seemed like hours.
"Um, so what if I told you guys I just hit a human?" Katsuki slowly said, a nervous chuckle following.
Izuku's heart fell to his stomach, disintegrating in the acid stored there. His mind was fuzzy. Of course, after all the promises of this being a safe ride, this is what he got. Why couldn't he just be home like any other kid? Now, he was going to be in jail for manslaughter not like any other kid!
He removed his hands from his face needing some sort of air circulating through his already desperate lungs. Shouto was glaring at Katsuki, not an inch of fear on his face after what they just did. Typical Shouto, totally missing the point in any serious situation.
"Then I would tell you, you would be getting the blame," Shouto replied. "Not me."
Katsuki's dreadful expression morphed into a scowl. "I could've just fucking killed someone and that's the only shit thought you have going in that pea sized brain of yours?"
"What else am I supposed to be worrying about? The weather?" Shouto scoffed, leaning back in his seat. "I think any killer's first thought is about jail."
"First of all, you're assuming! The fucker might not even be dead," Katsuki began. "Second of all, you're stupid."
Izuku could care less about what Shouto's witty retort could be. What he cared about - what they should all be caring about is the human they just hit with a car!
The seemingly only sane one in the car grabbed a handful of his hair, tugging on it. He let out a loud sob. "We just murdered someone!" He cried. "Our lives are over! Forget about college, settling down, having a good job-"
Katsuki and Shouto looked back at him, their anger dissipating as they stared at him.
Shouto reached back to take Izuku's hand out of his hair. "That's a real bad habit," Shouto commented. "It messes up your hair."
Izuku dropped his jaw, his eyes wide. "Are we really talking about my nervous habits right now? There is a DEAD body in front of this car!"
"Don't assume," Katsuki grumbled.
When Izuku made a shocked noise at the back of his throat, Katsuki sighed and unbuckled his seat belt, setting the car's headlights on the brightest setting. "I'll go check if they're alive."
He got out of the car, slamming the door harder than he needed to. Shouto's eyes followed him before they went back to Izuku. He was too calm.
"You know, if we did kill someone," Shouto started. And Izuku was waiting for something reassuring. Like they'd all stick together. Expecting that from Shouto was a mistake on his end.
"We can frame it on Katsuki," Shouto smiled. "After all, he was the one driving. And he's been getting a little too cocky with that driving license."
For a split second, Izuku was ready to nod along. But he knew Katsuki was way too stubborn and petty to ever let that happen. Not even in their wildest dreams.
He nearly jumped out of his clothes when Katsuki smacked his hand against Shouto's window. Shotuo huffed, turning to the window. He opened the car door and stepped out.
"Aggressive, aren't we?" He griped, walking past him.
"I would so hit you if this guy wasn't dead," Katsuki snarked.
Izuku stiffened. "D-Dead?"
"Uh, yeah," Katsuki pressed his palm to his forehead contemplating what to do next. Now he was appearing a little more nervous, glancing at the body every other second. "Take a look."
Gathering up the remaining courage he had, Izuku clasped the door handle, his hands sweaty as ever. With a deep inhale, he opened the door and got out, standing next to Katsuki.
"It'll be fine," Katsuki said, attempting a reassuring smile that just looked like a grimace.
Without a chance to reply, Izuku was cut off by Shouto's voice saying, "Hello?" They both immediately looked at him only to find him with his phone against his ear.
"I'd like to buy a plane ticket to your furthest destination today," Shouto said over the phone.
Katsuki rushed over to him, ripping the phone out of his grip and hanging up. "What. Is. Wrong. WITH YOU?" He seethed, throwing the phone to the dirt ground.
"Please," Shouto dismissed, putting his hand up. "Don't judge my attempts at fleeing. We just killed someone."
"We killed someone and your first instinct is to run?"
"No. My first instinct was to blame you."
Katsuki groans loudly and covers his face. He slouches over, still yelling into his hands. After a second, he stands up straighter as he takes a deep breath.
"You are the reason for my anger," He whispers to Shouto, though his whisper sounds quite strained to Izuku.
Shouto purses his lips and shakes his head. "No, I'd have to say that would be your own insecurities."
Katsuki blinks at him, then promptly gets in his face. "I am fucking going to add you to my growing list of stupid fucking murders!" He fumed. Shouto had a smug smile on his face. From Katsuki's posture, Izuku knew he was ready to attack.
Izuku interrupted so it wouldn't come to him burying 3 bodies instead of 1. "What," Izuku began, his voice cracking. "Are we gonna do?" If he was being honest with himself, he was ready to sprint down the road. He didn't have time for their daily arguing.
Shouto stepped away from Katsuki and towards him. "I think the real question is, why was this dude frolicking around in a wheat field in the dark? Seems to me like he had it coming." He shrugged, pursing his lips.
Dragging his hands down his own face, Izuku breathed out a laugh. "Wow! Wise words!" He threw his hands up. "The judge will hear that and we'll be pleading not guilty, going on our merry way home!"
Izuku paced around, quietly spewing out words to himself. Katsuki and Shouto glanced at each other, both uneasy at Izuku's anger.
"I think we broke him," Shouto said.
Izuku stopped and gaped at them. "Bro- We just killed someone!" He hysterically said. He fell to his knees, cupping his face in his hands. The tears were back, the anger regretfully leaving his system. The awful, pitiful feeling returned full force. The thought of spending the rest of his life in a cell, gradually rotting away left him winded.
Shouto placed his hand on his back. "We're just complicating something that could've been a hit-and-run."
With tears streaming down his face, Izuku managed a glare. "We-We are n-not gonna leave this- this man here!"
Shouto sighed. "If we are gonna turn ourselves in, can we stop by my house for a quick outfit change? I have a shirt that would look good in a mugshot."
Katsuki smacked him upside the head. "No. We're not going to turn ourselves in. Unlike you absolute losers, I have a life." He pinched the bridge of his nose, tilting his head back. "What we need to do is figure out where we're gonna hide the body."
"Wait, does this mean we'll go back to our daily lives, but slowly drift apart to avoid suspicion?" Shouto gasped. "Then when we get older, we'll reunite after this case is reopened and try to cover up our previous misdoings!"
Izuku stared at him completely aghast. It was incredibly unsettling that Shouto was so calm about this whole thing. Let alone planning an entire future, that Izuku did not find appealing, and being excited about it.
"This isn't a coming of age movie, Shouto," Katsuki rolled his eyes.
"Wh-What kind of mm-movies are you wh-watching?" Izuku exclaimed.
"We'll carry the nasty ass body into the fields and bury him there."
Izuku blubbered. "I can't b-buh-believe we k-killed a human being! Some-someone with a life!"
"Maybe it was for the better," Shouto comforted. "He could've been a neo-nazi for all we know."
Izuku only cried louder.
"Stop being a crybaby, Nerd," Katsuki tsked, looking into the field.
"We literally just killed somebody!"
Over Izuku's crying, Katsuki's thinking, and Shouto's detachment, they didn't notice a car approaching until they heard its breaks squeak. They froze like a deer in headlights. On the car read "police".
Katsuki paled, and if you listened closely, you could hear Shouto mumble, "Should've bought the plane ticket."
The window to the car rolled down revealing a gruff-looking man. His eyes go to the group of three first, then to the lifeless body behind them. He stares back at them.
"How 'bout you guys get in the car?"
Shouto and Katsuki slowly make eye contact with each other.
"It was him!" They said at the same time.
"I think the lesson of this all was to not text and drive," Shouto turned away from the car window to look at Katsuki. He was careful not to jostle Izuku who was leaning on his side ever since he fainted. "Shame on you!"
"You are a complete and utter idiot. I hate you. I am framing you."