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They made a silly, childish, stupid, promise when they were younger. About 8 maybe. They were at Tsukishima’s house, laying upside down on his bed, socked feet on the wall and staring at the glowing stars on the ceiling. They were talking about anything about what came to mind; what condiment goes with pizza (Yamaguchi liked ranch, Tsukishima thought that was appalling), which is the best muffin (Tsukishima liked blueberry, Yamaguchi liked chocolate, even though Tsukishima thought that it’s not a muffin but a cupcake. Yamaguchi argued that muffins are just cupcakes but advertised as muffins so people would buy it so companies can make money. Tsukishima didn’t argue), and then suddenly, they talked about love.
Not, I love this food or item type of love, but the fact of being in love with someone. Tsukishima wasn’t sure why they were talking about something as silly as that.
“Do you think you’ll ever be in love?” Yamaguchi had asked. It was only natural that kids thought about love. It was an inevitable question anyways, it was bound to be asked one day.
Tsukishima had shrugged then. “I don’t know. You?”
Yamaguchi’s head turned to look at him and Tsukishima looked at him back. Yamaguchi had a hopeful smile, smiling about something Tsukishima didn’t know about.
“I hope so. It looks nice. Probably feels nice too.”
“What if you don’t fall in love with someone, and stay single for the rest of your life?” Tsukishima wasn’t sure why he even asked Yamaguchi that question then. He probably wanted an answer for some reason.
”So negative, Tsukki. Then I’ll guess I’ll just stay by your side.”
Tsukishima didn’t know why his heart jumped then. He didn’t know many things.
“Mm, okay. Then why don’t we marry each other if we’re still single in the future? You already know me and it’ll be annoying for someone to try to know me like you do.” Tsukishima didn’t know why he said that.
Yamaguchi kept that smile on his face. He agreed to it. Tsukishima felt as if Yamaguchi knew more than him.
Here they are, about 13 years later. Tsukishima playing professional volleyball and Yamaguchi in college studying to be an engineer. He always liked that sort of stuff. They were living together, everybody saw it coming and themselves as well. They weren’t dating, though. Tsukishima wasn’t even sure if Yamaguchi even returned his feelings. He tried not to think about it.
He had just gotten home from practice, his limbs are achy and his fingers hurt too. He took off his damp practice clothes and jumped into the shower to rid himself of sweat. After showering, he dressed in sweatpants and a loose fitting t-shirt before going to the kitchen to find a snack.
Yamaguchi wasn’t home yet. He found that weird. It was too silent without him around. It was late too, Yamaguchi was always home earlier than him. Suddenly, there was a bang on the door, then the doorknob turned clumsily and Yamaguchi walked in. It was obvious he was drunk, maybe tipsy.
“Hey, Tsukki.” Yamaguchi greeted him, extending the vowels as he did so. He set his stuff on the floor and walked liked a newborn deer toward the kitchen island where he held on to it.
“Are you drunk?” Tsukishima asked. It was obvious that he was but he wanted to know if Yamaguchi was aware of it.
“Mm, yeah, I think so. I don’t know. My head is fuzzy and it hurts.” Yamaguchi replied, speech slurred.
“I’m assuming you went drinking with friends. You had a big test today didn’t you?” Tsukishima continued to talk and he watched as Yamaguchi nodded.
He wasn’t sure on how to take care of a drunk person. But nothing water and a painkiller can’t fix. Yamaguchi downed the water as if he was a man stranded in the desert and the painkiller as well.
“I’m sure you did well on your test, Yama.” Tsukishima patted his head and gave him another glass of water.
Yamaguchi looked cute, Tsukishima thought. His cheeks and nose were red, and his eyes were droopy. He looked more like a sleepy kitten than a drunk man.
“Thank you, Tsukki. I’m gonna go shower now.” He stopped leaning on the island and started to walk toward the bathroom, swaying side to side as he did. Tsukishima was anxious that he was going to fall.
“Don’t fall and crack your skull open.” Tsukishima told him.
”Yup, sure. You wouldn’t be able to marry me if I did.”
Tsukishima gulped. He remembers the promise they made. Quite frankly, he was stunned. Yamaguchi didn’t have a terrible memory, he knew that, he was prone to forget things sometimes. But he was amazed that Yamaguchi could remember something so insignificant from thirteen years ago.
Tsukishima was glad he remembered for one thing. That means Yamaguchi wasn’t in love with someone else, which means that he probably does have a chance with him. He shouldn’t get his hopes up too much.
Tsukishima wanted to watch a movie to busy his mind. He opened up Netflix on the TV and scrolled through the seemingly endless choices. Eventually he settled on a cheesy rom-com. Those types of movies were his guilty pleasure.
He heard the bathroom door open and Yamaguchi walked out drying his hair with a towel and another towel around his waist, heading over to his bedroom, still stumbling slightly like a baby.
He was still fit. Tsukishima could admit that. Yamaguchi eventually came back dressed in grey cotton gym shorts and an oversized pink shirt. He looked good in pink. His hair was damp from the shower and was slightly curling.
“Glad you didn’t die.” Tsukishima said as Yamaguchi laid down on the couch, his head near his thigh. He groaned slightly.
“I feel like shit.” Yamaguchi grumbled.
”Yeah. That’s what drinking does to you, dummy.” Tsukishima replied then patted his lap. “Put your head here.”
Yamaguchi did. The blond stroked the shorter boy’s hair, twirling some strands around his finger as he did so. Yamaguchi was facing the ceiling. His eyes were closed so Tsukishima was able to look down at him for a quick second and just admire.
He was so tempted to trace his freckles with his finger, touch his nose and stroke his eyebrows. He matured so much. His face was not that much different from his high school self, except his jawline was much more prominent and his face more structured than it was back then when he had a baby face.
He was so handsome, Tsukishima wanted to kiss him.
The taller boy looked back up at TV just in case Yamaguchi opened his eyes. And he did. He saw Yamaguchi reach up and take his glasses.
”What are you doing?” Tsukishima watched as he put them on. He looked cute.
”Wanna wear them. Do you ever forget to put them on?”
Tsukishima shook his head, “No because I wake up blind. I want to see.”
He could admire Yamaguchi now. He did. He stared at him as Yamaguchi continued to wear his glasses, looking directly at Tsukishima.
”Everything’s blurry.”
Perfect. Yamaguchi can’t see him looking at him with a stupid fond look on his face.
Without thinking, he cupped Yamaguchi’s cheek. “What would you do if I kissed you right now?”
“Don’t know. Find out.” Yamaguchi gave him the green light.
He leaned down then pressed his lips against Yamaguchi’s who eagerly kissed him back. He stroked his cheek as they kissed.
They broke apart. “I think I’m sober now.” Yamaguchi breathed heavily. He took Tsukishima’s glasses off. “You’re much better in clear vision.”
“You’re much prettier when you’re blurry.” He joked. Yamaguchi snorted then leaned up to kiss Tsukishima again.
“So we’re getting married?” Tsukishima grinned at him and Yamaguchi gave him a pretty smile.
”Of course, Tsukki.” He kissed the corner of Tsukishima’s mouth. “I’ve been in love with you ever since I was little.” He blurted.
Tsukishima’s eyes widened. “All that time?”
”I wasn't sure what it was then,” Yamaguchi sighed. “But I figured it out what I was feeling when we entered high school.”
“Gross, you love me.” Tsukishima laughed softly then kissed his nose.
“Shut up,” Yamaguchi huffed. His eyes softened. “I love you, Kei.”
”I love you too, Tadashi.”