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Temari inhaled deeply, savoring what was certain to be her last breath of fresh air before pushing open the dingy, beat up door in front of her. She stopped for a moment, taking note of the dull wood paneling that lined the walls, the gaudy neon lights advertising all varieties of swill that Konohans liked to call beer, assorted patrons spread around the room, and, lastly, the tall brunette making puppy eyes at her from the end of the bar. She scowled at her target and made her way across the room to stand before him.
“Hey Temari, have I told you recently how amazing, smart, funny-”
“Can it, Kiba” she snapped. “How does anyone, much less a jonin level shinobi, run out of money when planning a bar crawl? It’s pretty much the only actual requirement.”
He winced under her accusations, but wisely didn’t try to argue. “I guess I just didn’t expect everyone to drink so much?”
She rolled her eyes before taking the necessary money out of her purse, handing it to the bartender who had been patiently waiting to the side, and ordering a water. “You owe me one, Inuzuka.”
Recognizing that her anger had abated, he waved down the bartender to order a drink of his own and subtly appraised her appearance from the corner of his eye. “So… looks Ino’s plan to take Karui out for a ‘night on the town’ was successful- you’re not heading back out to meet up with the girls?”
She snorted. “Not a chance. As much fun as it was to go through Ino’s ‘mandatory makeover’ process and prance around Konoha’s dance clubs in a kimono that is one stiff breeze away from breaking just about all of Konoha’s public indecency laws, I think that I’ll pass.”
Kiba took a fresh sip of beer just in time to choke through his laughter, but she noticed the slight tension that remained in his shoulders that indicated there was something that he was hiding from her. “Are you sure that it’s safe to leave Karui with Ino and Sakura? I mean, they’re great girls, but-”
“Leave her with them? Before I left, Karui had them competing against one another to tell her the most embarrassing stories they could about Chouji’s childhood. I don’t think Karui is the one we should be worried-”
All of a sudden, she was cut off by a very loud and very emphatic individual at the back of the room. Temari tried to lean back to peer around the corner, only for Kiba to mirror her, deliberately blocking her view with a sheepish grin. “Umm… Temari, since you’re here, I also figured you should know-”
Temari scowled, grabbed his shoulder, and wrenched him out of the way.
“Kiba.”
He let out a deep sigh. “Yes?”
“Is there a reason why my husband is jamming a picture of Mirai into the face of a man who happens to be both her godfather and school teacher?”
Kiba turned around just in time to see Shikamaru grab Shino by the shoulders and loudly continue his story about 'the best goddaughter ever.'
“Umm… so remember when I mentioned that we ran out of money because I didn’t expect everyone to drink so much?”
Temari grabbed her water and stalked towards their group of friends. “Correction, you owe me way more than one, Kiba.”
Shikamaru was halfway through a story that was absolutely hilarious, regardless of what his audience may indicate, when he felt a hand land on his shoulder. He turned around and came face to face with a vaguely familiar woman who seemed to come straight from one of the magazines he used to... read as a teenager.
“Hey stranger, mind if I get you a drink?” Her ruby lips turned up in a wicked smirk that was probably intended to ignite a heat in his blood, but-
Shikamaru stared at her flatly before plucking her hand from his shoulder and turning back to his friends. “I’m not intereshted,” the slow delivery and heavy slurring revealing the true extent of his inebriation. He took a heavy pull from his drink, and seemed to miss the sudden silence from all of his companions.
The woman stepped to the side to join their group, her smile suddenly sharp. “Excuse me?”
He snorted in response, giving her a tired look over the rim of his glass. “I said ‘no thanksh’- you should really get your hearing checked.”
She made a small sound of disbelief, and one of his friends muttered, “Oh my God, this is it. She’s actually going to kill him,” under their breath.
He rolled his eyes at everyone’s reaction and faced the woman once again. “I’m just saying, you clearly put a lot of effort into trying to look like-” he paused a moment, struggling to find the right words, and finally gave up, just gesturing in her direction“-that in order to get some attention, but you should really find someone else because I am very much married.”
She crossed her arms over her chest. “I am very much aware.”
He squinted at her, once again trying to place her familiarity before shrugging absently. “Well, if you know that I’m married, then you also probably know whom I’m married to. Even if you are a capable kunoichi, the fact remains that my wife could eat you alive.” The heavy threat in his voice was undermined when he let out a shrill hiccup at the end.
“Unbelievable. Shikamaru, I am your wife, you absolute-” Temari lowered her voice when she noticed Chouji trying his best to ignore their tiff, “-ly ridiculous person.”
His eyes flashed in an uncharacteristic anger that seemed to burn through some of his drunken stupor. “You keep acting like I’m the unreasonable one here, but you’re the one who is crashing our party and has an apparent death wish. My wife is Temari Nara, the most terrifying kunoichi in the five great nations. She went toe to toe with Madara Uchiha and lived so unless you have some sort of God-like jutsu up your sleeve, you should really just jog on.” He punctuated the last by draining the last of his drink through another hiccup and once again turned away.
Temari closed her eyes and attempted to calm her rapidly fraying temper. On the one hand, his apparent devotion to her was admittedly charming and more than a little amusing. On the other hand, she was more than ready to go home and her patience was wearing thin. She was sorely tempted to leave him behind, but she could tell by the dirty looks they were getting from the bartender that Shikamaru wasn’t going to be allowed to stay for much longer, which would result in Choji and the rest of their overly-loyal friends leaving to take care of him. However, it was also obvious that her current approach to the situation wasn’t working, and it was time for a new strategy. No matter how absurd.
“Oh! You mean the Temari Nara? Formerly Temari of the Desert and princess of Sunagakure?”
Shikamaru turned around to face her, his face skeptical. “The one and only.”
“Oh wow, I’m actually a huge fan. I had heard that she moved to Konoha, but I couldn’t believe the news myself, what with her ties to the Sunan royal family.”
Shikamaru waited a beat before turning fully to face her, his eyes sparking with obvious interest. If it was one thing that could capture Shikamaru’s attention, it was the chance to complain. “Oh, it’s definitely true, but you would not believe all of the hassle we had to go through. The council meetings, the negotiations, the traditions-”
“It sounds fascinating, please tell me more.” Temari barely resisted the urge to roll her eyes, but felt a small thrill of success when she turned to walk to the front of the bar and he followed after her to continue their conversation.
“Fascinating?” he grumbled, “It wasn’t fascinating, it was a pain. Even after getting her brothers’ approval, I had to actually ask her, which felt like it should have been an S ranked mission, by the way. Then, once we were engaged, we had to petition the village governing councils, the kages, my clan, and just about everyone else in both Suna and Konoha just to have the damn ceremony. And now, when it’s finally over and done with, Ino’s trying to mess it all up again.”
She had been slowly moving them closer and closer to the door, issuing furtive waves at their various friends, and an appropriately rude gesture at Kiba, but stopped to shake her head in exasperation. “Now you’re just being dramatic.” She bit her tongue at the sudden outburst and opened the door, letting out the breath she had been holding when Shikamaru finally followed her out into the cool autumn air.
“Maybe a little, but I mean, come on, we only just got married a month ago, Karui just moved to the village, and Ino is already trying to push us about the whole Ino-Shika-Cho baby-making thing.” he grew silent trying to grapple with his thoughts- until he suddenly tripped over air and ran his shoulder into a wall, missing the way that Temari’s own steps had stuttered to a stop. “Ow.”
“Oh, for the love of- hold on. Let me help.” Temari carefully grabbed his wrist, looping it over her shoulder and continuing down the street towards their home, trying to pick out the right words. “What, do you… not want kids?”
Shikamaru frowned, the haze of alcohol slowly starting to lift as his mind began picking through the problem that had been plaguing him since Ino first broached the topic a week before. “No, it’s definitely not that. I’ve always wanted to be a father, and, at this point, I couldn’t really imagine having a child with anyone besides Temari . I guess the real issue is that I’m just afraid about talking to her... about...” he suddenly stopped walking and turned to look at her square in the eyes, his own opening wide in realization. “Oh, shi-”
Temari released his wrist, letting his body crumple to the ground without her support. “Good God, it took you long enough. ‘Genius of Konoha’ my ass. When we do have a kid, I hope it takes after me, because I have a hard enough time keeping track of one idiot.”
Shikamaru remained seated on the ground for a moment, blinking up at her with his jaw hanging open, looking like a fish out of water. “Wha- Tem- a kid?!”
She reached into the air in a stretch, letting his still-inebriated mind frantically piece itself together then released a heavy sigh and crouched down to close his still gaping mouth. “Listen, Shikamaru, I’m not mad at you, but I’m only going to say this once. We may have only gotten married a little over a month ago, but I’ve known you long enough to know that you’ve always wanted kids and a family; that it was always going to be a part of the life that you offered when you proposed to me. I’ll admit, it wasn’t something that I had originally wanted for myself, and a part of me is still absolutely terrified of the thought of being a mother, but when Ino mentioned it to me tonight, another, even bigger part of me loved the idea of having and raising a child with you.” She paused a moment and her soft expression darkened. “However, it’s something that you should have discussed with me directly, rather than letting your best friend blindside me at a bar crawl.”
The blood drained from his face, and he nodded enthusiastically at her. “Yes, absolutely. Noted. Next time, talk to you first about babies.”
She stood up and crossed her arms expectantly.
“And other important things! Not just babies!” She let out a small huff of air, and Shikamaru’s expression shifted back to one of awe and admiration as he considered the rest of her confession. “So- you knew about Ino and the whole… baby-making thing? And you’re ok with it?”
Temari stiffened for a moment, but then she slowly nodded, her expression once again softening and her lips slowly curving into a small, loving smile that seemed to light up her entire face and washed a wave of joy and contentment over Shikamaru’s heart.
“I have a shit-eating grin on my face right now, don’t I?”
She let out a slight chuckle. “Yup.”
“But it’s ok, because you love me anyway.”
Temari looked away for a moment, and Shikamaru felt his heart pound heavily against his ribs when he noticed a faint color on her cheeks. “Despite all of the odds, and despite the fact that you become an idiot when you get drunk, I do.”
God, he loved her. “Which is why you’re going to help me get home.”
Temari threw back her head in a full laugh before turning away from him and confidently continuing down the street. “Sorry, dear, but that doesn’t sound like something that’s befitting the most terrifying kunoichi in the five great nations. Plus, if I don’t get this makeup off of my face and get out of this ridiculous outfit in the next ten minutes, I may actually lose my mind.”
Shikamaru continued staring after her, still grinning like a fool, but finally taking the opportunity to appreciate the ways that the kimono molded to her curves, her hair fluttered in the wind, her heels accentuated every glorious muscle in her legs-
“You better get going if you want a chance to get started on all of that ‘babymaking’, Nara.”
Shikamaru never moved faster in his life.