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Deepest desires (give in)

Summary:

“A were-cat is never lost. We are where something important is to take place, because we’re supposed to be.”

Were-cats are good luck by shadowhunters' standards, so when a black, jewelry covered cat appears at the Institute, Alec pays him his respects. He needs it, considering the messes Clary and Jace keep dragging him in.

Alec certainly doesn't expect the were-cat to take a liking to him, and even less to start flirting with him...

Notes:

Thanks to @AceOnIce and @Lalelilolu for doing the beta-reading games on the Google Doc, and everyone who brainstormed with me for this story!

Here we go, Halloween fic inspired by this wonderful artwork, please give @misawkward all the love!


You can tweet me at #myulalie!

(See the end of the work for more notes and other works inspired by this one.)

Work Text:

Alec skirts a corner with more distance than necessary at the sight of one of the fake spiders Isabelle seems to love for Halloween. It’s barely the beginning of October yet she stuck the furry creatures at every corner of the Institute, their all-too many legs dangling over Alec’s head when he’s not careful enough.

It’s probably what gives Alec a chance to catch sight of the most beautiful man he’s ever seen. The profile of the stranger reminds him of a stained glass window. Smooth golden cheekbones that could cut through diamond, sparkling like a night sky. The bloody flick of a smile, and cat eyes flashing before the man turns into a cat.

Were-cats are good-luck by shadowhunters’ standards.

Alec relaxes slightly, confident in his safety within the walls of the Institute. Apart from fake spiders that is. He steps forward, intent on paying his respect to the were-cat. There is jewelry around the black cat’s neck, dangling golden chains, and bracelets of shiny beads on a string around his front paws. The were-cat wears silver earrings as well and Alec notices a snake-like ring around the cat’s tail too as he kneels to offer his hand, palm-up, in greeting.

Slit-pupils stare back at him, yellow eyes glowing with wisdom, and Alec startles as the were-cat by-passes the formal greeting to grace him with telepathy instead. Alec can’t complain, a were-cat bite creates a strange bond. The taste of Alec’s blood would remain with the were-cat forever.

Hey there pretty boy, the cat purrs.

Alec can feel his cheeks heating up and ducks his head to hide how flustered he is. The were-cat rubs his head against Alec’s hand, and nuzzles the shadowhunter’s fingers until Alec starts petting him.

Magnus, always flirting I see, another voice echoes in Alec’s head.

It’s Church, the Institute’s resident were-cat. He’s bigger than Magnus, and has a lot more hair too. They couldn’t be more different, day and night, and Alec chuckles when the black cat hisses at Church.

“He’s very pretty,” Alec blurts out.

Magnus purrs happily, winding around him. Church rolls his cat eyes, studying his claws, and deliberately licks the sharpest one.

I guess you’re right, this one is the smartest of the bunch, Church comments.

Alec bites his lip. He doesn’t take well to compliments usually, but there is some truth to this. Jace is reckless and Isabelle likes to flirt with danger. Since Clary’s arrival, Alec has yet to catch a break as they create mess after mess.

Sounds like he needs my help then, Magnus purrs again.

Magnus jumps in Alec’s arms and the shadowhunter holds the black cat against his chest, blushing when Magnus rubs his head against the deflect rune on Alec’s neck. Church shakes his head, and Alec can’t quite decide if the gray were-cat is amused or annoyed that Magnus took a liking to Alec.

Alec himself doesn’t know what to think, but as Magnus stays by his side for the rest of the day, he finds that he doesn’t mind.

Magnus tags along on patrol sometimes. Alec doesn’t see him often, the were-cat is busy doing whatever were-cats do. It’s a strange thing, patrolling with a cat by his side. Magnus looks extremely well-kept for a cat too, jewelry dangling from his neck and gleaming in the moonlight on his paws, tail and ears.

“I can’t believe we let a mundane inside the Institute,” Alec tells him.

You didn’t, your siblings did, Magnus argues.

“It’s all the same to my mother.”

The pavement is wet and shiny beneath their feet, and it’s eerily quiet in the area. Alec lets out a long suffering sigh that echoes against the brownstone buildings. Magnus winds between his legs, trying to comfort him. The were-cat’s presence seems to benefit Alec though, the messes Clary drags Jace and Isabelle into are less potent than before.

Murder is okay, you know, Magnus comments offhandedly.

Alec stops in his tracks, trying not to grin, “No, it’s not.”

Magnus flicks his tail and they resume walking, nearing the warehouse Clary ran into when she heard a noise. Skeletons hang from the roof, early Hallowen decorations that Alec doesn’t even bother being judgmental of. He nocks an arrow instead, ready to use his bow if necessary. Magnus stalks in front of him, his hackles already raised in a surprising display of ferocity.

The echo of dripping water leads them deeper inside the warehouse. They find Clary, Jace, Isabelle, and the mundane. Magnus hisses, pouncing forward and suddenly he appears bigger, the size of a panther. Simon stumbles back with a cry and falls in a puddle of water.

“I know you!” Clary exclaims, stepping forward without a care in the world.

Magnus bares his teeth when she reaches for him, Yes you do, although you don’t know the first thing about were-cats.

“Don’t touch him if you’re not invited to,” Isabelle explains.

You’re not, Magnus provides helpfully.

Alec has to hold back a smile as he escorts his siblings, Clary and the mundane out of the warehouse. Magnus doesn’t partake in formal greetings anyway, and good luck is probably not enough to negate Clary’s tendency to get in trouble.

Halloween decorations grin at them from dimly lit store fronts and Magnus looks his usual size once again. He paws at Alec’s leg, claws catching onto the shadowhunter’s jeans. Alec picks up the black were-cat without thinking and Magnus settles on his shoulders.

Simon keeps glancing at Magnus, his eyes wide behind his glasses. He tries to get his pants to dry, covered in mud from his fall in the puddle and Alec almost feels bad for the mundane. He must be cold.

“So were-cats are real?” Simon blurts out.

“All the stories are true,” Jace reminds him.

“Are you guys really wise?” Simon asks Magnus.

“What do you expect him to say? No, we’re actually really dumb?” Alec snaps.

“I don’t know,” Simon muses. “Do you have a preference between being in your cat form and in your human form?”

I prefer being able to smell and see sharp rather than having opposable thumbs, Magnus replies snidely.

Alec snorts and Magnus rubs his wet, cold snout along the deflect rune on the shadowhunter’s neck. It draws a chuckle out of Alec, then a full on giggle when the were-cat flicks his tongue, the sandpaper-like texture on Alec’s skin similar to someone tickling him. His siblings throw him surprised glances but don’t question his reaction when Magnus gives them a look.

“Is there a difference between cat form and human form, beside the obvious?” Clary muses aloud.

Magnus tenses on Alec’s shoulders. Were-cats are mysterious beings. No one is supposed to know much about them, and this is one of the taboos about their existence. They assume their cat form for a reason and Alec has never asked Magnus about his, admittedly gorgeous, human form.

Nothing you should worry about, Magnus eventually replies.

No one asks anymore questions after that.

Alec worries when he finds Magnus’ ring one morning, but the were-cat is nowhere to be seen. It’s not unusual for Magnus to disappear for a few days, and even Church, who sticks to the Institute because of Hodge, doesn’t always show his face to the shadowhunters living there.

Lost jewelry, however, is no laughing matter.

Alec draws the tracking rune on the back of his hand and clutches his fingers around the silver ring, focusing intently on the images flashing through his mind. A penthouse, on top of a brownstone house in Brooklyn.

Alec is gone before anyone can ask him where he’s headed. He speeds past oblivious mundanes chatting about Halloween costumes. Alec himself hides under a glamour to run ever faster, the speed rune sending shots of energy through his muscles.

The building comes into view, finally, and he climbs up the stairs with a grimace of disgust at the sight of an all too real spider among fake spider webs. The door of the penthouse opens when Alec pushes it, and he steps inside cautiously, holding onto a seraph blade.

He catches sight of Magnus in the living room. They stare at each other for a brief moment, Magnus half-naked under a satin dressing gown. Then, there is a black cat standing in Magnus’ place and the smooth fabric pools around him.

“You scared me,” Alec sighs in relief.

He crouches, offering the lost ring to Magnus. The were-cat slithers around him, purring and rubbing affectionately against Alec’s legs. He flicks his tail in Alec’s face, the black fur soft against the shadowhunter’s nose. It tickles and Alec laughs, grabbing the tip of Magnus’ tail to hold it still and slide the ring back in place. The were-cat glances at his tail and preens at the sight of the snake-like ring, glinting in stark contrast with his black fur.

Friends of mine visited yesterday, Magnus tells him.

“Did you have fun?” Alec inquires, standing up.

Magnus doesn’t reply immediately, jumping on the sofa instead and looking expectantly at Alec. The shadowhunter joins him and Magnus curls up in his lap, rubbing his face against Alec’s stomach. Alec squirms a little, holding back a giggle, but doesn’t ask Magnus to stop.

I did. We don’t see each other often. Catarina is often busy at the hospital, between her job as a nurse and the time she spends in cat form to appease her patients. Ragnor isn’t that busy actually, but he’s a recluse.

Alec smiles, happy that the were-cat got to spend time with his friends. Magnus yawns and stops nudging Alec’s stomach, but doesn’t fall asleep straight away. Alec hesitates before laying a hand on top of the were-cat, petting him carefully. Magnus doesn’t stir.

What about you? Did your siblings and Clary get in trouble again while I was gone?

Alec rolls his eyes just thinking about it. He’s tired of taking the blame for unsanctioned missions and demons are particularly active at this time of the year. They draw power from the increase of fake yet powerful rituals that mundanes come up with for Halloween. Alec would rather keep talking about Magnus’ friends instead. His eyes travel around the living room, taking in the timeless decorations and comfortable furniture.

“They got someone wrongfully accused, and defending that person put my job on the line,” Alec eventually recalls. “Not Clary’s, who isn’t officially a shadowhunter yet.”

Magnus flicks his ears in annoyance and the silver earrings catch the light, sparkling briefly. Alec runs his fingers over the were-cat’s black fur in an attempt to soothe him and Magnus huffs.

“You always get upset on my behalf,” Alec mutters affectionately.

Your feelings matter.

Alec finds nothing to reply to that.

New York is mostly quiet, demons wise, after Halloween and even more since they got rid of Valentine, yet Magnus keeps patrolling with Alec. The were-cat trails forward, eager to get away from Alec’s siblings to explore some of the darker streets. Alec follows, listening to Jace and Clary bickering about getting a snack on the way back to the Institute.

What would you like for a snack? Magnus asks Alec.

The black cat flicks his tail, glancing at the shadowhunter over his shoulder. They’re away from the others now, and nearing the Hotel Dumort. Alec glances at the imposing building, wondering if this is what interests Magnus so much in the area.

“Well I, for one, would love a blood group O,” someone replies from the shadows.

Magnus darts forward, winding between the vampire’s legs, Raphael, long time no see!

“I like you better in your cat form,” the leader of the vampire clan tells him.

Magnus looks offended, but he stays by Raphael’s side, and the vampire makes no move to step away from Magnus.

“Magnus is pretty in his human form too,” Alec blurts out without thinking.

The were-cat glances at the shadowhunter, his yellow eyes shining with pride. Alec blushes and looks away, ignoring Raphael’s loud sound of disgust. The sound of fabric tearing echoes in the dark alley and Magnus jumps away from Raphael with a satisfied mewl, wrapping around Alec’s ankles instead.

Now, that’s a good incentive to take on my human form more often, Magnus purrs. Bugging Raphael and making Alexander blush, it’s a win-win.

“As if you’d have half the self-control you have now,” Raphael mutters, trying to fix his ripped pants.

Magnus gives the vampire a look and Raphael doesn’t elaborate anymore on that. Alec’s siblings, Clary and the mundane catch up to them then, and they part ways soon after, not without an awkward exchange between Simon and Raphael. Odd, Alec muses, but what sparked his curiosity the most however, is the mention of Magnus’ self-control. He’s hesitant about asking about it when he picks up Magnus to go back to the Institute, but eventually caves in.

“Are you… different in your human form?” Alec tries carefully.

Magnus hums, nuzzling against his chest to hide from the cold. Alec doesn’t expect an answer, or at least not a straightforward one, but the were-cat surprises him. It’s an intimate thought, that no one else but the shadowhunter is meant to hear.

Were-cats are wise, and humans give in to their deepest desires.

Alec wonders what it means. What would Magnus desire so much that taking on his human form, he would not be able to control himself? Why would he keep himself from getting what he wants, anyway? Magnus deserves everything.

Were-cats like to be where things happen, but humans… humans take action, Magnus goes on. When you want something, you make it happen.

It rings true, and Alec holds Magnus closer.

Alec draws an arrow from his quiver and nocks it. The presence he felt pressing at his back disappears further in the dark alley. Alec keeps his bow lowered, the string lax between his fingers still. Magnus winds around his ankles and a shiver runs through Alec’s body as he notices the magic flickering on the black cat’s fur.

This is no unfortunate encounter with a demon.

Alec swivels around as soon as he can pinpoint where they are. The Circle member falls without a sound, an arrow through the neck. Magnus hisses at Alec’s back, magic crackling angrily against the brownstone buildings, and suddenly Alec is back to back with the were-cat in human form.

He can’t spare a glance over his shoulder to catch sight of Magnus, though, so Alec releases another arrow and moves along. Following Magnus is easy, because Alec trusts him. He keeps the were-cat to his back and the alley lights up with lightning, Magnus’ magic flashing around like fire.

Clary and Jace have defeated Valentine, but the Circle remains active. Alec is not surprised in the least that they came for him. The Circle never respected were-cats, don’t even consider them a threat, so Alec appears like an easy target.

Magnus sends them flying like it’s nothing, dislocated bodies falling to the ground like twigs.

It’s over in a matter of seconds. The dark alley is silent once again and Alec turns around slowly, finally facing Magnus. The were-cat’s eyes glow in the dark, slit-pupils like millennium old bugs trapped in amber. Jewelry glints on Magnus’ golden skin, and Alec swallows with difficulty. Magnus looks ready to pounce on him.

“M-Magnus?” he calls out.

The vision disappears instantly, replaced by Magnus’ usual cat form. Did the heat of the battle get to him somehow? Alec wonders, but the were-cat doesn’t say anything, curling around his legs instead with a mewl. It’s unusual, and Alec chooses not to address it. Magnus’ words ring in his ears still, and he muses about what the were-cat wants, and what Magnus would do to get it, if he remained in his human form.

Alec himself is not quite sure what his deepest desire is.

Alec stumbles into Magnus’ loft late at night. He presses the palm of his hand to his shoulder, trying to slow the bleeding at least, and staggers across the living room. He’s going to crash, but Alec would rather fall on the sofa than on the cold hard ground. It took him way too long to get up from the dark alley the Circle members cornered him in earlier.

“Alexander?” a foreign voice calls.

Whoever is in Magnus’ loft, they know his name. He’s safe, and they’ll help him. Alec sighs and relaxes on the sofa, drenching it in blood. He curls up on himself, too cold, and closes his eyes.

Alec comes back to his senses slowly. He’s sprawled out on a too smooth bed, silken sheets rumpled all around him. There is an unnatural shine to the fabric, and Alec notices a weight on his back when he shifts to study it more closely.

It’s a man, lying on top of him. He smells of salt and rain, like he has spent his day outside, and tightens his hold on Alec when the shadowhunter moves. Nothing hurts, so Alec assumes he’s completely healed. He tries to turn around to see the face of his bed companion, although he has a pretty good idea as the cold brush of jewelry sends a shiver down his spine.

“Magnus?”

He can feel Magnus curling up around him with a yawn, and the were-cat nuzzles his face against Alec’s neck, the touch foreign. Magnus’ skin is warm, and there is low rumble in the were-cat’s chest, like a purr. Alec is reluctant to shake Magnus awake, but he also wants to thank him and make sure he’s not imposing.

“Come on, wake up,” he tries again.

Just a little more, comes Magnus’ telepathic reply.

Alec almost believes the were-cat has turned into his feline form, then he realizes he can still feel the entire length of Magnus’ very human, very masculine body against his. Magnus wraps around him, breathing Alec in deeply, and purrs again. Magnus smells of sandalwood, Alec notices now that he’s more awake.

The shadowhunter jerks when he feels slightly too sharp teeth nibbling at his neck, and shakes the were-cat off. Magnus finally wakes up, blinking at him through heavy lashes, his cat eyes not quite glowing yet. The were-cat’s slit-pupils dilate as he remembers where they are and what form he’s in. Alec stares at smooth, golden skin taut over Magnus’ cheekbones, the were-cat’s face bare of makeup for once.

“Thank you,” Alec whispers before Magnus decides to take on his cat form again. “I didn’t mean to bother you.”

“You’re not a burden,” Magnus replies in a whisper.

The were-cat’s voice is rough from lack of use, but his breath brushes over Alec’s lips, which part open. Magnus hums, his Adam apple bobbing around the long forgotten sound, pink tongue darting out to wet his lips. He’s only wearing loose clothing, sleep-wear probably, and Alec feels constricted in his gear.

“Make yourself at home,” Magnus starts. “I should…” he gestures at himself.

Alec doesn’t want him to turn into a cat again. He’s always loved curling up with the black cat, but this feels different. Magnus never talked to Alec aloud before, and his voice sounds like melting honey when it pours out of his full lips. Alec knows he shouldn’t, but Magnus was right about humans. They give in to their deepest desires.

He leans in and covers Magnus’ lips with his, licking into the were-cat’s mouth when Magnus kisses him back. Magnus feels warm and pliant against him, not afraid to hold onto Alec and push him back into the mattress. Their shirts disappear instantly.

Magnus’ tongue is wet and soft, trailing along Alec’s upper lip with a purpose and the shadowhunter throws his head back when Magnus presses hot, open-mouthed kisses to his neck next. The deflect rune provides the perfect pathway down to Alec’s naked chest and he shudders when Magnus’ too sharp teeth graze over his collarbone.

Magnus pulls away abruptly, straddling Alec’s thighs.

The were-cat’s eyes are glowing bright, yet there is a darkness there that threatens to take over the slit-pupils. Alec sits up, leaning on his elbows and Magnus sighs, trailing his fingers down Alec’s chest, playing with the dark patch of hair there.

“What’s wrong?”

“I never accepted your formal greeting,” Magnus replies, evasive.

“You have an unconventional way of accepting greetings,” Alec nods slowly.

“No,” Magnus shakes his head. “I allowed you to touch me, but I never… I didn’t nip your fingers or anything.”

Alec reaches for his neck, where he remembers feeling Magnus’ sharp teeth for the first time, then his collarbone. He knows were-cats get a taste of someone’s blood upon greeting them, allowing a magic bond to take place.

“Usually we use the blood for tracking,” Magnus tells him, catching onto his thoughts. “A were-cat is never lost. We are where something important is to take place, because we’re supposed to be.”

“You can’t track me,” Alec repeats slowly. “We always find each other though.”

Magnus smiles, and cups Alec’s face with black painted fingers, “If I go through a formal greeting with you, the bond between us will be different.”

“Like Hodge and Church?” Alec asks, frowning.

“Not exactly,” Magnus shakes his head, jewelry glinting in the dim light. “A soul bond. I can only give you a claiming bite.”

Alec keeps silent. He has heard of soul bonds, there used to be a parabatai bond for shadowhunters. What Magnus means, however, sounds different and when he looks up, Magnus’ eyes are soft and affectionate. He caresses Alec’s cheek, scooting closer.

“I want to love you,” he breathes out against Alec’s lips.

Alec tilts his head up for a kiss, and Magnus’ thoughts reach out to Alec’s, merging together. Alec is not quite sure where his end and where Magnus’ begin, but the words sing in his mind, like no one did before you and they ring true.

Notes:

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