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He promised himself not to be late.
Yet here he was, running down the street, sweat trickling down his back under the coat as he tried not to bump into passersby who clearly weren’t paying any attention to whatever was happening around them. He huffed every time someone stood on his path and tried to maneuver as best as he could, but it only took more of his precious time, of which he was slowly running out of. He could feel his phone vibrate in the inner pocket of his coat but he ignored it, knowing it would only take up his time to answer and listen to yet another lecture. Yes, he promised to change and he did, but sometimes it felt like it was just him against the whole world, making him look bad in front of his fellow idols, sponsors and Anzu. It wasn’t even his fault this time and he didn’t do it because of his own selfish reasons to uphold his laid-back persona. The weather, traffic and people around him all seemed to discourage him from his best efforts at becoming a reliable man that took his job seriously, all that just to make him late once again in his life.
It was weird to work without other members of UNDEAD, but sometimes everyone needed a change, especially after creating a similar type of content with the same three people for a longer time. He had to admit that with time, as they grew closer, he became fond of his unitmates, their performances becoming more than just a job for him, bringing him fun and making him look forward to the next one. At some point he stopped doing this just for the audience’s appraisal and for the attention of their fans and started enjoying being on stage just for the sake of it. It was fun to create music and later perform it with UNDEAD, despite the amount of hours they had to spend beforehand, practicing.
But this one job in particular was different from his usual ones.
He finally made it to the building, the desk clerk looking up at him with little interest, more invested in her paperwork to truly care what was happening around her. But she must have recognized him as she nodded at him, letting him pass the lobby without any trouble. He stood in front of the elevator door, hitting the button multiple times and tapping his shoe against the carpeted floor. He could only breathe easier once he went inside, going up to the seventh floor where Anzu was already waiting for him at the door, simply waving her hand at him in greeting as she told him to hurry up and go change. He followed her down the hall, opening the door with the “staff only” sign as he finally made it into the dressing room. Everyone seemed to be there already, getting last touch ups on their suits and having makeup artists work their magic as they prepared them for the shoot.
And he was there as well, sitting at one of the leather couches with legs crossed at the ankles, scrolling his phone idly while waiting for everyone else to get ready. He looked up the second the door opened though, his phone immediately forgotten.
“Hakaze!” he shouted from across the room, smiling that closed eye smile of his, bright and genuine, making Kaoru stop at the door sill.
But before he could react properly, a staff member appeared in front of him out of nowhere, carrying a bag with his suit and pushing it into Kaoru’s hands to make him hurry up and change. He put a hand on Kaoru’s arm, already guiding him towards the bathroom where he would be able to put on his stage outfit in peace. He was talking a million words per minute, not a single one of them registering in Kaoru’s mind as he let himself be led wherever, looking over his shoulder just to find Chiaki staring back at him, still smiling but this one seemed softer, like he was thinking about something dear to him, making Kaoru want to finally say something when the bathroom door closed behind him.
Kaoru felt his shoulders slump immediately, his chest squeezing when he finally was alone in the room. He put the bag with the suit on the counter, deciding he needed to calm down first before getting ready for the job. So he looked at his reflection in the mirror, noticing how his own ears turned red at the tips and he hated how easily his own body betrayed him. Gripping the edge of the sink, he tried to get rid of his own thoughts, but Chiaki was there every time he closed his eyes.
He was there, looking stunning, sitting with his ankles crossed, looking all comfortable, the green of his suit contrasting his hair like it was picked just for him, despite other members of their temporary unit being made to wear the exact same color. Yet the way the waistcoat was hugging his body, how his collarbones showed with his top button undone, the pants fitting him like second skin, it all made Kaoru lose his mind.
It was the first time seeing Chiaki in a suit. He usually wore much more comfortable clothes, the ones that reminded Kaoru of being at home somehow, when Chiaki always hugged him immediately after spotting him in the crowd, smelling like his favorite cologne, french fries and the wooden floor of their highschool gym, the scent clinging to him somehow, despite the fact he was already a graduate.
He was used to seeing him like this, with his shirts that looked a tad too big on him, but still fitting his style perfectly, cozy and warm and everything Chiaki. Or his stage clothes, all red and black, the color scheme sticking to him all throughout the years, immediately associated with him in Kaoru’s mind.
The suit and the green was something new though, making Kaoru reach the new stages in his stupid little crush. He turned on the water, splashing some on his face, hoping that it would make his skin look less pink as he tried to calm down enough to start getting ready for the recording. He had to, he was a professional after all. A crush or not, he will do his job properly, saving his thoughts about Chiaki for later, when he was alone and staring at the ceiling until the wee hours of the morning, pathetic and poignant, wishing he could finally act on his feelings without fearing for rejection.