Chapter Text
“Younghoon—Oh. Sorry.”
Sangyeon covered his eyes as he heard Younghoon and whoever he was making out with scramble and knock over a few chairs.
“Sangyeon?”
“I’ll come back later. It’s okay,” Sangyeon laughed nervously and turned, “I’ll just go.”
“Tell him to turn off the lights,” Chanhee whispered.
Wait, “Chanhee?”
“Shit, shit.”
“It’s fine,” Younghoon turned to face him, “It’s just you, right?”
“Yeah just me.”
Chanhee peeked out from behind Younghoon, “You won’t tell anyone?”
“No of course not,” Sangyeon assured them, “It’s fine guys. I’ll-“ he turned the lights back off “-see you guys later.”
He hurried out of the room, his mind reeling from what he’d just seen. He’d been friends with both of them for years, and neither of them seemed to be… at the point where they would make out with each other. They did bicker a lot and were very handsy but that was normal among them. Why didn’t he know? Was he supposed to know? What was he supposed to do with this information?
❤🧡💛💚💙💜
“Hyung? You good?”
Sangyeon blinked when Eric waved a hand over his face, “Huh? Oh yeah why?”
“You haven’t eaten,” Kevin pointed at his lunch container, “You’re usually done before the freshies are out for lunch.”
“Oh,” Sangyeon shoveled another spoonful of his fried rice, “I was just thinking.”
“About what?” Sunwoo asked as he sat on the floor opposite them.
Sangyeon wondered how to phrase it, “What makes someone gay?”
Haknyeon, who had been drinking a cafeteria slushie, had to lean away to stop himself from choking. Sunwoo patted him on the back to help.
Kevin didn’t miss a beat, “Well, some people are just born gay, as Theology of the Body would have us think—”
“Kevin.”
“Yeah, sorry. I’m so tired of that class.”
“I know,” Jacob reached over and held his hand, “Me too. But to answer your question um, it’s different for every person.”
“I figured as much,” Sangyeon nodded, “But, I don’t know, I just want to understand it? Especially since—”
You won’t tell anyone?
“—Nevermind.”
His four friends exchanged looks before Haknyeon asked, “Hyung are you gay?”
“What? No I don’t think so,” Sangyeon frowned, “What would make you think that?”
“Dunno, you’re asking pretty sus questions,” Sunwoo said before taking a sip from Haknyeon’s slushie.
“What’s sus?” Changmin asked as he, Juyeon, and Hyunjae joined their lunch circle.
“Hyung’s asking questions about gay people,” Kevin filled.
“What why? Are you gay?” Hyunjae asked, “’Cause if you are, I’m free this weekend—”
“Dude, stop,” Juyeon laughed, “But seriously, hyung are you?”
“I mean, it would make sense,” Changmin said as he ripped open his moist sandwich bag, “You’ve been friends with all of us for years.”
Sangyeon felt the crease on his forehead get deeper, “What does that have to do with it?”
“Gay people tend to clump together when the system’s against them,” Hyunjae said, very matter-of-factly as he leaned over to get a spoonful of Sangyeon’s rice.
It took a minute for that to sink in, “Wait, more of you are gay?”
Kevin laughed, “More of us? Hyung, all of us are gay.”
“… What?”
“Except for Haknyeon,” Sunwoo added.
“I’m ace,” Haknyeon agreed between bites of his lunch.
“What?”
“It means asexual,” Juyeon added unhelpfully.
Sangyeon had been friends with the same 10 people for as long as he could remember; they’d all been neighbors since elementary, and Kevin and Jacob moved in in middle school. So for him not to know this was… baffling? Was it neglectful on his end?
“Wait wait I… Since when? The whole high school? Why did I not know?”
“I dunno, we did nothing to hide it?” Hyunjae crunched loudly on his kimchi, “Kevin and Jacob have been saying they’re soulmates for years.”
“Chanhee and Younghoon have been skirting around each other’s dicks for ages,” Changmin added.
Oh Changmin, wait until you find out. Sangyeon thought back to Chanhee and Younghoon tangled with each other and groaning in the dark, empty classroom, knocking into desks and scattering papers without a care in the world.
“And,” Sunwoo said, “Hyunjae-hyung has tea on everybody he knows, Kevin-hyung wears corsets to the mall, and Juyeon-hyung and Eric have a monthly skincare sleepover—"
“Did you really not notice?” Eric laughed.
“I didn’t want to make judgments?” Sangyeon couldn’t decide whether his face was on fire or just straight up numb, “I’m so sorry.”
“Hey no don’t be,” Jacob assured him, “It’s really decent of you. Kind of our faults that we never told you explicitly.”
“… do you not like it?” Juyeon asked.
Haknyeon’s eyes widened, “If you’re not okay with it we can stop—”
Kevin snorted, “How would we stop?”
Sangyeon’s spoon hit his container, “No don’t stop… being gay. I don’t have a problem with it, I just, I don’t get it.”
“That’s okay too,” Hyunjae patted him on the head, “We’re not expecting you to.”
❤🧡💛💚💙💜
The sentiment was nice, but Sangyeon didn’t want to settle for that. He wanted to get it. These were his friends he’d known since middle school, some even longer. He considered himself a good friend, yet he’d spent almost every day with them and had no idea about such an important part of their identities.
“Sangyeon,” Younghoon snapped his fingers under his nose, “Lee Sangyeon you better not make me solve this seatwork by myself.”
“Yeah sorry,” He laughed, “Where were we?”
“Number 30, one of those work problems. I never remember how to solve them.”
Younghoon and Chanhee had missed the whole lunch hour. And everyone at the table assumed they were somewhere arguing or doing some sort of school work. But Sangyeon wondered whether they had stayed in the classroom, and risked someone else walking in on them. Or if they had moved somewhere more private like the bathroom, or one of the broom closets…
Peter can mow the lawn in 40 minutes and his boyfriend John--
“What?”
“What?” Younghoon echoes.
“Nothing, I read it wrong,” Sangyeon frowned.
--his friend John can mow the lawn in 60 minutes. How long will it take for them to mow the lawn together?
“I can’t think anymore.”
“Same oh my god,” Younghoon sighed, leaning back in his chair, “My dick is so loud right now.”
Younghoon usually said stuff like that, but now that Sangyeon knew he was talking about Chanhee it was weird, “Are you in love with him?” he asked quietly.
“Pffffft WHAT? NO what the fuck,” Younghoon spat, then quieted down when their teacher gave them a look, “What the fuck Sangyeon.”
“I mean you…” have been skirting around each other’s dicks for years “… seemed really into it a while ago.”
“Because he wanted a good makeout and I’m not a shit friend,” Younghoon narrowed his eyes, “You didn’t tell the others, did you? Or anyone? You promised.”
“I didn’t tell anyone!” Sangyeon leaned and pretended to be answering the problem set, “But do you love him?”
“Eh, no, not yet.”
“How do you know when you do?”
“I’ll love him when we have time for that stuff,” Younghoon tapped his Apple watch and swiped to his calendar, “Maybe we’ll be in love after finals or something.”
Sangyeon understood that. Kind of. “Is that a thing that gay friends just do with each other? Make out without actually dating?”
“We’re both down so,” Younghoon shrugged, “It works.”
“Okay. So if you’re not dating why do you care so much about people not knowing?”
Younghoon hums, putting their pointless scratch paper and problem set aside, “Do you know about Kevin’s shit?”
Sangyeon picked through his memories, “That he hates theology?”
“It’s because he was, you know, being a basic gay bitch in freshman year and someone ratted him out to a teacher. And people have been treating him weirdly ever since.”
Sangyeon frowned, “Even the teachers?”
“The teachers started it. Haven’t you noticed?”
“Honestly no,” Sangyeon frowned, “But then again I didn’t know any of you were gay until today.”
“Seriously?” Younghoon laughed, “Well yeah, that’s why we don’t want people to know. That and neither of us want to admit we made out, we know the others have been betting on us for years.”
“Time’s up! Pass your papers.”
Sangyeon scribbled one of their half assed solutions onto the paper and passed it forward, “If the teachers were so terrible to Kevin, why hasn’t he changed school?”
“He wants to stay, instead of having to start over somewhere else. And, you know,” Younghoon’s expression was a weird mix of fondness and disgust, “Sangyeon, if you’re looking for some young gay love, don’t ask me. Ask Jacob and Kevin.”
❤🧡💛💚💙💜
Sangyeon watched the chat on his phone as Kevin and Jacob went back and forth at each other on the groupchat. Occasionally someone would interject with a meme, but the two kind of acted like they were in a private chat. He used to find their friendship really cute, but now that he knew they were dating it was even sweeter. He smiled when the groupchat started to flood with random emojis and keyboard smashes from either end.
A notification popped up in his private chat with Eric, so he switched tabs.
BABIE YOUNGJAE
- < hyung r ur parents home?
- Yes why? >
- < a ok nvm
- < ill just hang @ sunoos place
- Is your uncle giving you problems? >
- You know you can come over if you need to >
- < no it k i jst need a place to study properly
- < maybe sleep there too
- < ik ur parents get bothered when I spend the night
- Theyre just concerned its ok >
- I can convince them if you really need to stay >
- < nah hyungii its fine im alr at sunoos driveway
- < night see you tomo 💙💙
- … >
- Ok sleep well >
- Be safe >
Sangyeon turned off his screen a moment before it turned on again with a last message from Eric.
- < 💙💙💙
Their groupchat was still blowing up with random, incomprehensible things. Sangyeon smiled fondly at the fourth haircut monkey of the hour. He didn’t know what he would do if anything happened to these boys.