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Soobin was probably the happiest he’d been in a while. The, still blue haired boy, although it was fading quite a bit, had passed his junior year of college with flying colors. He couldn’t believe he was going to be a senior soon. He would miss Yeonjun, who had graduated this year, which Soobin also couldn’t believe. The older would go to work at a dance studio, as one of the choreographers there, and Soobin couldn’t be more proud.
Speaking of proud, it was probably the emotion he felt most of the time, especially right now. Soobin was spread out on his bed, Beomgyu curled into his side. The younger was talking about how he couldn’t believe he passed his freshman year, even after the struggle that was the written composition piece (which Soobin helped him with eventually).
Soobin was looking at the younger, carding his hands through his black hair slowly. Beomgyu looked adorable, talking animatedly about his favorite classes and how he was chosen for the buddy system next year, “Me hyung! I can’t believe it, I hope I can do well though.” He said, turning his head to Soobin.
The older chuckled, quickly tapping Beomgyu on the nose, to which the younger scrunched up his nose adorably, “You’ll do great Gyu-ah, anyone is lucky to have you as their buddy.”
Beomgyu flushed, before cuddling further into Soobin, if that was possible. “We have this buddy summer camp thing this month, it’s not really a camp, it’s just one day but still…” The younger said.
Soobin turned Beomgyu, so that he was practically laying on top of him, which resulted in a squeak from the younger and said, “Don’t worry too much love, just bring your cane this time hm? I can’t have my baby getting hurt now.” Soobin pecked the younger’s lips quickly, seeing Beomgyu’s face already darken from all of the pet names.
“Tsk hyung, what was that….at least kiss me properly.”
And like always, Soobin couldn’t say no.
-
It was the day of the buddy summer camp, and Beomgyu had asked Soobin if he could drive him to the campground and Soobin agreed, of course. Beomgyu was frantically making sure he had everything, the younger hated if he missed anything on a trip.
“Gyu-ah, you’re going to be late if you continue stressing over nothing.” Soobin said, looking on the clock.
“Yeah, yeah I’m coming hyung.” Beomgyu hastily closed his bag, and walked up to Soobin. He grabbed the older’s sleeve, as he usually did when they went out, and the two of them headed to the campground.
The drive up was longer than expected, but the couple had fun in the car. They listened to songs, and Beomgyu even got the older as far as singing along. When they arrived at the campground it was decked out in decorations, something you would expect from a buddy summer camp.
The two of them stepped out of the car, Soobin carrying Beomgyu’s bag up to the cabin he was staying in. There was no sign of his buddy yet, who he’d be sharing the cabin with. The younger was busy feeling his way around, wanting to get familiar with the place he was staying in.
Soobin gave him his time, looking out at the window. He was about to tell Beomgyu the place looked nice, when the cabin door creaked open. Soobin turned his head to the door, seeing a blonde haired boy walk in. He was carrying a bag, as well as a guitar on his back. And Soobin didn’t want to admit it, but the boy was pretty. He had big brown eyes and a sharp nose. The boy was wearing a denim jacket over denim jeans, and it shouldn’t look good, but it did.
Soobin was glad he had his height still, as he easily towered over the other boy. “Hi! I’m Kang Taehyun, one of you must be my buddy then.” The boy said, smiling as he put his bag down next to the door.
“Yeah that’s me! I’m Choi Beomgyu, nice to meet you!” Beomgyu said, always polite. The two of them shook hands, before Taehyun’s attention turned to Soobin.
“And...you are?” Taehyun said, and something about the tone didn’t sit right with Soobin. He was glad he decided to wear his leather jacket today, hoping to look at least a bit intimidating.
“I’m Soobin, Beomgyu’s boyfriend .” He made sure to stress the last part, he wasn’t sure why he felt the need to do that, but he thought it had something to do with the smile Taehyun was still giving Beomgyu.
“Aah! Nice to meet you then,” the blonde said, and the lack of honorifics certainly annoyed Soobin, “I think they’re doing some introduction outside, do you want to check it out?” He continued, turning to Beomgyu.
“Oh yeah sure!” Beomgyu said, nodding his head, “I’ll talk to you tomorrow yeah hyung?”
“Y-Yeah, of course Gyu-ah, have fun!” Soobin tried not to be bitter, he quickly pecked the younger on the lips as he was being pulled away by Taehyun. Soobin’s eye twitched, he knew how much Beomgyu hated to be pulled around.
The weird feeling in his stomach didn’t disappear as he watched the pair leave the cabin, Beomgyu’s hand clutched at Taehyun’s sleeve.
-
“It’s probably nothing Soobin, you’re making a big deal out of this.”
After coming back from the campground, he made sure to visit Yeonjun first. The older was in the studio, working on a new routine, when Soobin barged in.
“But hyung,” Soobin whined, “you didn’t see how he was looking at him, like only I am supposed to look at him like that.”
Deep down Soobin knew he was being ridiculous, but the feeling of jealousy was stronger than his capability to have rational thoughts at the moment. Yeonjun sighed, grabbing a bottle of water before gulping it down, “You really think some freshman is going to come in and swoop Beomgyu off his feet in one day?” The older said, staring at him with raised brows.
“Yes!” Soobin slid down the chair he sat on, opting to wallow on the ground instead.
Yeonjun sat down next to him, patting his leg in fake pity, “There there, you’ll be fine. I never thought I’d see the stoic Soobin like this.” He laughed.
“Yah hyung! I’m having a real problem and you’re not helping.” Soobin glared at him.
“Okay okay fine!” Yeonjun held his hands up, “You know how much Beomgyu adores you, he wouldn’t give up a relationship of a year for someone he just met Soobinnie.” He added, voice getting softer at the end.
Soobin thought about it, surely he was right, Beomgyu adored him, and he adored Beomgyu. They were fine, Soobin was stressing over nothing.
“Yeah….yeah thanks hyung!” Soobin jumped up, dimples protruding as he smiled brightly.
“Yeah no problem.” Yeonjun snickered, as he watched Soobin run out of the studio, going back to his routine.
-
It was almost time to pick Beomgyu up, it being the next day, Soobin was excited. The two of them were basically always together, and Soobin would be lying if he said he didn’t miss the younger.
He was putting on his shoes to head out, when he heard his phone go off. He fished it out of his pocket, quickly answering when he saw the user ID “Gyu<3333” pop up.
“Hey baby, I was just going to pick you up.” Soobin said, trying to tie his shoe with one hand.
“Hey hyung! I was actually calling about that, I’m staying a bit longer, they have like a bonfire tonight that I really want to go to! Taehyun will bring me back tomorrow morning.”
Soobin almost dropped his phone, Taehyun would bring him back?
“O-oh, okay Gyu-ah, stay safe okay?” He said.
He could practically hear Beomgyu scoff through the phone, “Hyung~I’ll be fine, Taehyun will be my eyes.”
He could hear the laughing through the phone, and Soobin’s heart sank. He was supposed to be Beomgyu’s eyes.
“Hyung I’ll hang up now okay? Yah I’m coming” Beomgyu whispered the last part, probably talking to Taehyun.
“Y-yeah, bye Gyu-ah.” And just like that the call disconnected. Soobin took his shoes back off and hung up his coat again. He looked around his apartment, it was awfully quiet. Usually Beomgyu would be here listening to one of his favorite dramas, or blasting music throughout the living room.
Soobin usually found it annoying when the younger did that, but now he felt like he missed it more than anything. And maybe Soobin was clingy, he just liked physical affection, and he missed having someone to cuddle with.
He sighed, sitting back down on the couch and closing his eyes. Whatever, he’ll be back tomorrow and it’ll be fine.
Right?
-
Turns out, it wasn’t fine.
Apparently the buddy summer camp was such a success, that they decided to extend the program. That meant that Beomgyu was even busier now, doing all sorts of activities which of course, included Taehyun.
The couple still called, but it didn’t feel the same to Soobin. They weren’t living together, but they wanted to spend as much time together this summer seeing as Soobin would probably be extremely busy in his senior year. But it seemed like that plan was thrown out the window, as Beomgyu was spending more time with his buddy than with his boyfriend.
Now here Soobin was, sulking on his bed, hugging a pillow. Should he call Beomgyu? He wasn’t sure if the younger had any plans today, and he would love to see him, if only on video call.
So he called, waiting for Beomgyu to pick up. He was about to hang up, sighing when it seemed like no one would answer, when Beomgyu’s face popped up on the screen.
Soobin’s heart swelled, the younger looked adorable, as he usually did, hair fluffed up, falling over his forehead. “Hey hyung!” The younger said, smiling into the camera.
Soobin smiled back, although the younger couldn’t see it, he was sure it could be heard in his voice. “Hey Gyu-ah, are you busy right now?”
“Ahh not at the moment no, was there something hyung?” Beomgyu said.
“Just wanted to talk is all, actually I was wondering if you wanted to hang out later? We could go to the ice cream place you love!” Soobin’s voice was hopeful.
“I don’t think I can hyung, I have to guide Taehyun around the campus today, and we have an after party later!” The younger smiled.
Soobin’s smile immediately vanished, “How long is that buddy thing even for? It seems like you’re spending the whole summer with him.” He said, voice clearly agitated.
“Yah hyung what’s that supposed to mean? You know I like doing this, we can hang out next week okay?
Soobin scoffed, “Yeah it seems like you like doing this a whole lot.”
Beomgyu had a frown on his face, “What are you talking about, you’re acting as if I need to be glued to your hip at all times, I can spend time with others too you know."
Soobin’s heart cracked a little at that, but the hurt was masked by anger instead, all of Soobin’s insecurities resurfacing. “I haven’t seen you practically all summer! You’re spending all of your time with some other guy while your boyfriend has to make due with a phone call once in a blue moon.”
Beomgyu’s frown deepened, “I don’t know what you want me to say hyung, I’m having fun and I can’t help it if Yeonjun hyung is too busy to spend time with you.”
That hurt, Soobin had told Beomgyu about how he didn’t have a lot of friends, him being too insecure and awkward to click with anyone. He didn’t think the younger would use that against him. He was about to speak up again, when he heard a voice coming from Beomgyu’s side of the screen.
He could vaguely make out a head of blonde hair appearing behind Beomgyu, and Soobin already knew it was Taehyun. He scoffed again, voice almost breaking as he said, “Yeah, no that’s fine, have fun with Taehyun, Beomgyu.”
He quickly hung up the video call, not wanting to see the frown etched on Beomgyu’s face anymore. He threw the phone on his bed, putting his hands on his face. He felt like crying, his mind already racing with thoughts.
Maybe I am annoying . Maybe Taehyun is way more fun than I am, he’s closer to Beomgyu’s age as well, they probably have a lot more in common, they even share the same major for crying out loud!
Soobin sighed, rolling on his side as he hugged the pillow closer. He had never been good at social interactions, and was always concerned about what other people thought of him. It wasn’t a healthy mindset, not at all, but he has had it for as long as he could remember. Yeonjun was always good at comforting the younger, making sure he felt good about himself. Soobin thought it was time he should do that himself, although it wasn’t going so well.
His eyes were getting tired, and he figured a small nap wouldn’t hurt, so before he could spiral further, he quickly closed his eyes and drifted off, a small tear escaping his eye.
-
Soobin was ripped from his nap by knocking on his door. Confused, he looked at the alarm clock on his night stand, it was 9 p.m. Soobin sighed, having napped for way too long, he dragged himself out of bed, stealing a quick glance in the mirror. He was wearing his college hoodie, with sweatpants, and his hair was disheveled from laying on his side. He ran a hand through it briefly before the knocking on the door returned.
“I’m coming!” He yelled out, rubbing his eyes to get the sleep out of them. He yawned before opening the door, and any trace of fatigue quickly left as he took in the sight in front of him.
Taehyun stood in front of his door, face red and out of breath. He carried Beomgyu on his back, who clearly seemed drunk, head lolling around on Taehyun’s shoulder. “Sorry Soobin-sunbae, we were at the after party and he just kept drinking. I tried stopping him but he’s really strong when he’s drunk.”
Soobin quickly let the two of them in, Taehyun dropping Beomgyu on the couch, who curled in on himself, muttering things Soobin didn’t quite catch. Taehyun straightened his back, before turning to Soobin, “Woah he’s heavier than he looks,” Taehyun snickered, straightening out his back, “He kept asking for you, you know?”
Soobin’s eyes widened, falling on the younger boy on the couch. “I don’t know if you fought or whatever, and it’s really none of my business, but….he said he missed you.” The blonde said, shooting Soobin an apologetic smile, before bowing and making his way out of Soobin’s apartment.
The older’s eyes followed him to the front door, and once he heard the familiar sound of the door falling shut he turned to Beomgyu. The younger was still curled up in a ball on the couch, and Soobin quietly made his way over.
“Gyu-ah? How are you feeling?” Soobin asked, even though he still was a bit annoyed, the concern for his boyfriend took priority.
Beomgyu whimpered, lifting his head up, glossy eyes meeting Soobin’s own. “Soobin hyung?” He stuttered, sniffling.
“Yeah baby, yeah it’s me.” Soobin reassured, moving closer to the boy.
Beomgyu hands shot out, and he already had a hold on Soobin’s hoodie, pulling himself up so that his head was leaning on Soobin’s stomach.
“Im sorry hyung.” Beomgyu sniffled, “I’m sorry for ignoring you, I didn’t mean to and-and if you think there’s something between me and Taehyun there isn’t hyung I swear there isn’t because I love you hyung.”
Soobin’s hand came to a halt from where he was stroking the younger boy’s head.
“You...you love me?” Soobin asked, voice wavering.
“Yeah hyung I love you so so much.” Beomgyu said, snuggling deeper into Soobin’s hoodie.
They hadn’t said those words to each other before, Soobin never knew the right timing and he wanted it to be special, he wasn’t quite sure if this was the right time, the alcohol smell radiating off of Beomgyu.
So the older hooked his arms under the younger’s knees, easily lifting him up, remembering what Taehyun had said earlier, he wasn’t heavy at all. Soobin picked him up bridal style, Beomgyu’s hands finding their way around his neck.
He walked to Soobin’s bedroom, which they usually shared. He softly laid the boy down, who whined, hands wandering around, looking for Soobin. Soobin took the other’s jeans off, and quickly changed him into pajama pants before changing himself.
Laying beside Beomgyu, the latter wasted no time in cuddling up to Soobin, throwing a leg over the older. Soobin smiled, carding his hand through the soft black hair. He was still annoyed, or more so insecure, but he figured they’d talk about it in the morning.
For now, Soobin was just glad Beomgyu was home again.
-
The couple woke up the next morning, Soobin stretching out his long limbs, before remembering who was laying next to him.
The younger grunted, probably sporting a massive headache, before burying his face back into Soobin’s chest. “You always smell so nice hyung.” He said.
Soobin chuckled, before moving him off. “Let me get you something for that headache, I’ll be right back.” He got out of bed and made his way over to the kitchen, grabbing the medicine and a glass of water and going back to the room.
Beomgyu was sitting up, gaze moving to the door once he heard it open. “Here you go.” Soobin said, handing the other the medicine and water, watching as he gulped it down.
“Thanks hyung.” Beomgyu said, sheepishly looking away.
“I’m sorry for how I acted yesterday, it was just me being me I guess.” The older scratched the back of his neck, embarrassment coloring his face.
“No hyung! You don’t have to apologize at all, I know I haven’t been the best boyfriend at all but I just….I don’t want you to get tired of me I guess.” Beomgyu said, playing with the rim of the glass.
Soobin’s eyes widened, getting tired of him? He thought. There was no way Soobin would get tired of Beomgyu, he felt like it would be the other way around. “What are you talking about Gyu, I’d never get tired of you love.”
The younger brightened at the pet name, before his face fell again. “It’s just that hyung’s going to be a senior and I don’t want to burden you, having to lead me everywhere like a child.” He pouted, slightly kicking his feet.
“Hey, listen.” Soobin said, grabbing Beomgyu’s hands, “I don’t mind leading you, I don’t mind being your eyes okay? As long as you’ll hold onto me I’ll guide you anywhere you want, always.”
He could see the tears forming in Beomgyu’s eyes, which he tried blinking away. “So...we’re fine hyung?” He sniffled.
Soobin smiled, caressing Beomgyu’s cheeks, “Yeah, we’re fine Gyu.”
He leaned in, brushing his nose over Beomgyu’s, his signal for when he was about to kiss him. Beomgyu smiled.
The kiss felt just like the first one, Beomgyu always kissed so timidly, and Soobin found it endearing. They broke apart, needing the air.
“I love you Beomgyu-ah.”
Beomgyu’s eyes widened, before letting out a breathy laugh, “I was hoping you would forget about me saying it.”
“Why? Did you not mean it?” Soobin said, teasing the younger.
“No! Of course I do….I love you hyung.”
Soobin pecked his lips again, and the two of them sat there smiling at each other like idiots. “Ah but hyung! Summer is almost over now.” The younger pouted, and Soobin wanted to kiss it away.
“That’s okay Gyu-ah, we may have lost the summer, but there’s always winter.”