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When he was six, Jin Ling started to notice the sad lines along his jiujiu’s face. He once thought it was just how jiujiu’s face worked, but then if jiujiu wasn’t angry or smiling at Jin Ling, he would always sigh, and he would look so tired .
Jin Ling’s nanny helped him confirm that his jiujiu was indeed sad.
“But why is he sad?”
“Oh Young Master, you are far too young. But,” his nanny says gleefully. She always liked to gossip. “It’s because your uncle has been blacklisted from matchmakers.”
Tilting his head curiously, Jin Ling asks, “What does that mean?”
“It means your uncle won’t be able to get married. And if he doesn’t get married, he won’t be happy.”
Jin Ling frowns at that. The nanny just chuckles at him and advises him to help his uncle be a better man when he grows up.
Jin Ling doesn’t understand. Jiujiu is already a better man. No, the best . So why does this marriage thing keep him from being happy?
“When I grow up, I will marry you! I will be the best wife ever so you’ll be happy!” Jin Ling proudly declares.
His jiujiu chokes on air. “A-Ling, where did you learn that?!” he squawks.
“From nanny! She said that jiujiu will be happy when he gets married, so I’ll marry jiujiu so he’ll be happy!”
Jin Ling did not expect the tears that suddenly ran down his jiujiu’s pretty face, and it makes him panic, which means he’s going to cry too.
“Oh, A-Ling.”
His jiujiu pulls him into a hug, and Jin Ling clumsily tries to hug back. He feels his jiujiu press a kiss on his hair.
“Your jiujiu is okay. I’m happy, knowing you’re here with me. You don’t have to be concerned over your uncle’s troubles, A-Ling, really.”
His jiujiu chokes up on his words, and Jin Ling can do nothing else but hold on to his jiujiiu’s robes tighter.
His jiujiu forgets about the proposal. But Jin Ling doesn’t.
At the age of 13, Jin Ling starts sending in courtship gifts.
When his jiujiu learns about the reason why Jin Ling is giving him gifts whenever he’s away on Koi Tower, he laughs, giving Jin Ling pats on the head.
“You can’t give me courtship gifts A-Ling. You only have to give them to someone who you love or want to marry.”
“But I do love you, jiujiu! All of these gifts are for you,” Jin Ling argues. He doesn’t understand. Is jiujiu rejecting him?
The older man shakes his head.
“Not that kind of love, A-Ling. The romantic kind is what I’m talking about, and you don’t feel that way for me.”
Jin Ling fumes, annoyed now. “Stop putting words in my mouth! I do love you, why can’t you understand that?!”
And then Jin Ling storms off, hands clenched into fists at his side. Fairy barks and follows immediately.
Jin Ling finds his jiujiu standing under a tall, straight tree within the temple.
Upon spotting him, the older man clicks his tongue. “Wipe your face,” he tells Jin Ling.
Jin Ling sniffs, but obeys. He recalls back to the moment when something flashed across his jiujiu’s face during his talk with Wei Wuxian, as if his jiujiu wanted to say something.
He points this out, but gets immediately dismissed.
“We’re going back. Each to their own sect.”
Jin Ling frowns, and voices out his objections. “I want to go back to Lotus Pier!”
It seems that jiujiu was really exhausted, because he didn’t even put up a fight. Jin Ling doesn’t like it. His jiujiu should be angry and annoyed that Jin Ling was being such a brat. And yet he doesn’t even speak even when Jin Ling follows him all the way back to Lotus Pier.
When they arrive, the Jiang sect leader retires early for the night, and Jin Ling doesn’t miss the way his shoulders sag a bit more than usual, and how there is nothing to be seen of that usual bark his jiujiu always gives out.
His heart twinges in pain, wishing he could just take away all of the hurt his jiujiu is carrying.
When the late night comes, Jin Ling knocks on his jiujiu’s door. There is no answer that comes, but Jin Ling is nothing if hard-headed, and so he lets himself in.
He finds his jiujiu curled up on his bed, and he almost cries at the sight.
“Jiujiu,” he whispers. “I want to sleep with you.”
“Go ‘leep ‘n ‘yer own bed,” is the muttered reply he receives.
“But I want to be next to you”
When he receives no other reply, Jin Ling tries for another route.
“Jiujiu...shushu was the one who taught me how to read..”
This gets his jiujiu’s attention, and he hears a heavy sigh from the older man. Finally, his jiujiu turns around, shifting just enough to give space for Jin Ling to crawl onto.
Jin Ling greedily accepts the invitation, and snuggles himself in his jiujiu’s warmth. The older man uses his arms to encase Jin Ling, and the boy has never been in a place more safe than tucked inside his jiujiu’s bigger body.
“Go to sleep A-Ling,” his jiujiu murmurs.
Jin Ling hugs him back. His jiujiu lets out a pleased sound.
At this age, Jin Ling didn’t think he’d have the chance to sleep like this with jiujiu again, but he knows he should make the most of this chance.
“Jiujiu, I’m still going to marry you someday, okay? Then you’ll be happy.”
A sigh comes from the older man, and his jiujiu sleepily mutters. “Only when you’re bigger than me.”
Jin Ling huddles closer, taking mental note of this. Someday, he will be the one who holds jiujiu, just like how jiujiu is holding him right now. Someday, he’ll be the one who protects, who will give his jiujiu a safe space.
That night, Jin Ling made a promise to himself. To change for the better, and give back everything his jiujiu has ever given to him.
Jiang Cheng knows he’s staring, but in all honesty he can’t bring himself to look away.
It’s been two years since he’s gotten a good look on A-Ling. And what the fu- when had he gotten so big ?!
Jin Ling is taller than him now, broader shoulders, longer hair, and an air of importance around him not even the late peacock could compete with. Jiang Cheng gulps. Fuck, he’s more handsome too, hard edges that bring off undeniable maturity.
Where did his cute little nephew go?! The spoiled brat who always used to cling to him while wailing ‘jiujiu’?!
Jiang Cheng couldn’t believe that his A-Ling had grown this much within such a short time.
When he noticed that A-Ling was starting to avoid him, it felt like something had roughly grabbed a hold of his heart. It was something understandable though, seeing as Jin Ling was Sect Leader Jin now, and the mess left behind by the late Jin Guangyao would have all been dumped on him.
It still hurt though, realizing that the kid, now a man, didn’t need him anymore. Still, Jiang Cheng respected his nephew and any boundaries he makes, even when it’s at the cost of spending time with his only remaining family.
“Jiujiu”
Jiang Cheng was jolted out of his stupor. A-Ling still called him that at least.
“Sect Leader Jin,” Jiang Cheng greeted back, giving respect that Jin Ling more than deserved.
Jin Ling steps closer until he is quite literally crowding Jiang Cheng’s personal space. Jiang Cheng is mortified at how he can feel his face is heating up.
Surely this is a natural reaction. Jin Ling was incredibly attractive, not even coming close to how his father used to look, and Jin Zixuan was third on that stupid bachelor list.
To add to his horror, Jiang Cheng realized he has to look up to meet his nephew’s eyes. If this was any other person, Jiang Cheng would have felt highly offended someone would try to intimidate him like this, but this was his A-Ling, and - and why is getting closer what the fuck A-Ling what the fuck his face is so close -
Jiang Cheng coughed, stepping backward. He stiffens when he feels his back collide against a wall.
“Jiujiu, remember I said I would marry you? That was a promise I have always meant to keep.”
Jiang Cheng flushes, remembering the things his nephew would say to him back when he was still little. He had thought Jin Ling was just confused at the time, and would eventually grow up on it.
He had no idea it was going to fucking reach this point.
Donning what he hopes look like a stern face, Jiang Cheng told his nephew off.
“A-Ling, this - this childish thing has to stop now. You’re already old enough to know that you were only confused.”
This seems to anger his nephew, and Jin Ling’s face twists into a scowl. Something in Jiang Cheng aches when he sees just how similar that expression is to his own.
“Why don’t you still understand?! I only want what’s best for you, everything I have done you were the one in my mind. I love you, jiujiu,” Jin Ling takes in a deep breath. “I’m in love with you.”
Jiang Cheng stares, speechless.
Before he could even begin to process that last part, Jin Ling moves forward, and Jiang Cheng feels soft lips on his own.
It lasts for only a second. Jin Ling leans back a bit, and with this Jiang Cheng could clearly see his eyes. His mother’s eyes. Jiang Yanli always had the most beautiful eyes, until Jiang Cheng watched them dim into death.
“Jiujiu, if you don’t want this, then push me away,” Jin Ling whispers against his lips. “It doesn’t matter, I will still pursue you.”
Jiang Cheng’s breath hitches.
A second later, Jin Ling is kissing him again, longer this time. And when his nephew doesn’t receive any resistance, he licks his lips. Jiang Cheng’s mouth parted for only a little, but it was enough for his nephew to get inside, tongue savoring his uncle’s taste.
Jiang Cheng doesn’t know which one of them moaned, but it was probably him.
He feels Jin Ling’s arms wrap around his waist, bringing their chests flush against each other. Jiang Cheng felt trapped, but it didn’t feel uncomfortable.
Jiang Cheng shifts his head in order to deepen the kiss. He feels Jin Ling hum against his mouth, pleased. A tongue sweeps along his teeth, and he sucks on his nephew’s tongue in return.
His nephew tastes like Lanling wine, probably from the conference earlier. Jiang Cheng didn’t like alcohol that came from anywhere else other than Yunmeng, but this, mixed with the unique taste of his nephew, it tasted divine .
He loses himself in Jin Ling, knees trembling with want, and it was a good thing Jin Ling was holding him up otherwise he would have embarrassingly crashed on the floor.
Finally, after what felt like forever, they had to part for breath.
Jiang Cheng pants, not knowing when he had started to clutch Jin Ling’s robes. Their breaths mingle in the air, and Jin Ling doesn’t let go of his hold.
The look he gives Jiang Cheng makes him blush.
“Jiujiu, I’m assuming you are not opposed to this,” his A-Ling says, smirking in mirth. Jiang Cheng wants to knock his head to wipe that smirk of his face, but his hands are currently squeezed in between their bodies.
Still blushing, Jiang Cheng turns his face away, unwilling to look as he replies, “I do not dislike it.”
And it seemed like a satisfying enough response for Jin Ling. He beams at his uncle, hugging his smaller figure tighter.
Jiang Cheng sighs, and could only rest his head on his nephew’s shoulder.
This was so wrong , but gods, Jin Ling has always been his greatest weakness.
Jin Ling couldn’t even be bothered to hide the smile on his face as he goes about his duties for the rest of the day.
The promise of sleeping in the same bed with his jiujiu tonight brings a lot of things in mind.
His jiujiu had laughed earlier, pointing out at how he had managed to outgrow his father in everything, even in marriage proposals.
He doesn’t totally get it, since he rarely hears stories about his parents, but he committed his jiujiu’s face to memory. He makes another promise to himself to make his jiujiu laugh as often as possible, because it was a good look on him.
And at that moment, Jin Ling would have to admit he fell all the more in love.
There was still no promise of marriage, but right now, Jin Ling will take what he can get, and give what he was allowed to give. For now, he has his jiujiu in his arms, smiling and happy , and that is enough.