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No way, no, no, no.

This was bad. Really fucking bad. Chan sighed while cursing in his head.

“Minho is right, I am a stupid witch,“ he mumbled to himself. His friend always jokingly called him that, but at the moment he felt like those words were more accurate than he wanted to admit.

How could he ever think it was a good idea to deliver this particular order tonight of all nights? Another sigh left his lips while he looked up into the sky where the full moon mockingly shined down on him.

Usually, it was just a quick stop at Hyunjin’s and Seungmin’s little farmhouse. Nothing out of the ordinary - save for the fact that Hyunjin was a werewolf.

As the herbs and potions he brought them were of utmost importance to keep their (mostly Hyunjin’s), more feral side at bay, he usually put their order on the “high priority“ pile. But sometimes misfortune happened, and it hit Chan this month. The box somehow got misplaced under a stack of delivery notes, and he found it only after it was two days due already.

So without thinking - or checking his moon calendar that is - he grabbed the box and went off to deliver it right away. And now he was paying the price for his carelessness.

He knew it wasn’t Hyunjin’s fault, and would never blame the young werewolf for biting his forearm when he had given the package to his boyfriend. Instincts couldn’t be helped sometimes, especially when Chan himself was the reason they were going haywire today for Hyunjin. This damn forgotten delivery.

Seungmin had made sure to clean the wound thoroughly and bandage it, while Hyunjin was stuttering apology after apology. But the damage had already been done, and Chan wasn’t one to dwell on things he couldn’t change. So he had tried to calm the younger boy down again and made sure Hyunjin knew he wasn’t mad at him in any way.

Chan gnawed on his lip; in conclusion, and really because there was no way around it: coming new moon, Chan would entirely turn into a werewolf. Though the bite was tiny, because of the stupidly round and glowy thing in the night sky, it was powerful enough to transfer the genetic code to change him.

And he wouldn’t be that bothered by it, he wasn’t the first werewolf witch, but there was a problem of way bigger significance - Felix.

Like every good witch, though debatable on this day, Chan had a familiar. In his case, that was Felix. And Felix per se wasn’t the issue in this equation, seeing as he had the kindest soul and the biggest heart; it was more what he was - namely a cat shapeshifter.

And now Chan was a werewolf - which in his books wasn’t the best combination.

Felix would kill him. Okay, Chan knew he wouldn’t, but he might never cuddle him again. Which was, in Chan’s opinion, even worse. Although it was just platonic cuddling, he didn’t want to give it up for anything in the world. Both being held by Felix and hugging him was the most valuable time spent during a day. 

Only in his dreams, Chan wished for a different kind of relationship. He knew it wasn’t anything unusual anymore to see witches and their familiars in a romantic setting. Still, he also didn’t want to make Felix feel uncomfortable around him or like he was forced into anything.

Just a few streets away from his apartment, raindrops started to splash onto Chan’s windshield as he looked for a place to park. The only available one was a 5-minute-walk to his doorstep, which on a clear night wasn’t any trouble but by now it was pouring.

With a big sigh, he opened the console of his car to grab his umbrella, only to grasp at nothing. Whipping his head around to check again, he indeed found it completely empty. Leaning forward, he rested his forehead against the steering wheel and forced himself to breathe evenly - trying actively to keep the tears threatening to fall at bay.

Abruptly he leant back, drawing in air to steel himself before getting out into the rain. And although he sprinted the entire way to the apartment, he was drenched when he arrived in front of the door. He felt the water squishing in and out from his socks whenever he took a step and quite fast, the coldness began to settle into his entire body.

Chan still let a few moments pass while he just stood there, bracing himself for every possible outcome that lay behind that closed door. Finally, he decided on walking straight to his room as fast and quietly as he could. With bated breath, he turned the key in the lock and pushed the door open, only for it to spitefully betray him, creaking loudly halfway through. 

Panicked, he hurried inside, kicking the door closed with his heel, while already trying to get out of his jacket and shoes. The haste made him extra clumsy as he tripped over his foot, almost landing face-first on the floor. 

Almost. 

Because something caught him mid-fall. Or rather someone. Chan didn’t even have to look up to know who it was. His nose was buried in the soft material of a yellow hoodie; smelling so distinctly like Felix. Sunshine, Brownies and something he had never smelled before. He couldn’t quite pinpoint it, but his brand-new instincts were screaming “cat”. It wasn’t unpleasant, just new. But now an entirely different thought hit him like a train. Was he always so aware of his best friend’s scent?

Slowly he looked up and found Felix already staring down at him. Eyebrows furrowed in confusion and his cute button nose, which was spotted with freckles, scrunched. “Are you okay, Chan?” The concern was evident in his pleasantly deep voice. 

“Yeah, sure, why you asking?” Chan rushed out, his head still in a haze, staring into Felix’s gorgeous face, framed by fluffy blond hair. The light from the hallway made it look almost like a halo.

“Because you’re still lying in my arms and you’re soaked.” 

At those words, Chan instantly stood up straight. He immediately felt how his shirt stuck to his upper body and realised he stood in a literal puddle of water, courtesy of his own clothes. Scratching the back of his head in embarrassment, Chan felt his ears heating up as well. He wished for nothing more than the floor swallowing him whole.

“Why do you smell like a wet dog?” Felix suddenly blurted out. 

Whipping his eyes back up at his familiar, he opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to think of a good excuse. 

“I was at Seungmin and Hyunjin’s.”

“That doesn’t explain why you smell like dog, though.”

“I scratched Hyunjin’s ears,” Chan squeaked out, and even to himself, it sounded more like a question. It was his last attempt to find a way out of this conversation. “You know, I… I should really take a shower, so I won’t get sick. Ha, ha, ha.” He took one last look into Felix’s squinted eyes before he surged past him and straight to the bathroom.

As soon as the door shut behind him with a bang, he leaned against it, sliding down until his butt touched the tiled floor. He let his head fall between his propped up knees and sighed. Once more, for the approximately seventh time that night, he felt like crying. 

Chan couldn’t stop thinking of Felix’s eyes when he saw him. They usually were as sparkly as if holding the entire universe, but back in the hallway, he hadn’t seen a single star. His eyes had been so dark and… was it disgust Chan had read in them? 

It wasn’t until a shiver went through his entire body that he decided to get up and actually take a shower, else he might catch pneumonia on top of that. And maybe, the hot water would clear his mind.

He turned on the tap and undressed while waiting for the water to obtain the ideal temperature. Carefully he took the bandage off and inspected the bite marks on his forearm. They were bigger than initially due to the slight swelling around the edges.

Chan drew in a sharp breath when the water hit the wound, but soon the intense pain subsided, and there was only a small aching left. Nothing compared to the one he felt thinking of Felix’s appalled expression.

Even after he used up all the warm water, Chan still didn’t have any idea how to avoid that conversation, if possible forever. “Do you have any idea, rubber ducky?” he whispered, looking down at his yellow squeaky bathing companion. He waited for a second, hoping it would magically speak to him (which honestly wasn’t so farfetched, seeing as he’d already met a speaking stone out in his backyard once). When he still didn’t get an answer, he sighed again, “yeah, didn’t think so.”

With his fluffiest towel slung around his hips, he went to his bedroom after quickly blow-drying his hair. Thankfully he didn’t pass Felix on the way. Maybe, Chan thought, he was steering clear of him now, because of the weird smell he gave off.

Chan looked for his comfiest clothes to wallow some more in his self-pity and to spend the rest of his miserable life in them. Maybe he was being overdramatic, but with the prospect of never getting a hug from Felix ever again, he felt like he’d lost all of his happiness.

He let his gaze wander back to the little wound on his arm; the skin around it irritated and red. How could such an insignificant thing turn his life upside down? Chan let his shoulders drop and crawled on top of his bed. Resigned, he searched through the drawer of his bedside table for a band-aid. Sure, he should probably put some healing salve on it and use an actual bandage, but he also felt like he deserved the angry stinging.

Leaving it like that, he buried himself underneath his blankets, which he knew didn’t make the whole ordeal go away, but he could certainly try and pretend. 

A soft knock at his door jerked Chan back to reality. He didn’t even know how long he’d been sitting there. Episodes of the show he had mindlessly started on Netflix seamlessly blended together, making him lose track of time. Rubbing lethargy out of his face, he glanced at the time on his display. 02:30 - it had been almost three hours. Another knock, this time more insistent.

“Chan, can I come in?“ Felix’s raspy voice came from the other side. 

Pulling the blankets even tighter around himself, Chan prepared himself internally, at last managing a meek “Yeah.“

That was all the invitation Felix needed. Timidly he stuck his head inside before he opened it entirely and stood a little lost in the doorway. His sparkly eyes fixed on the perfect picture of misery that was Chan. 

“Please, tell me what’s going on,” he inquired softly, but with a seriousness Chan rarely ever heard in his voice. Chan swallowed hard. He knew there was no way out of this and maybe it was best to just pull the metaphorical bandaid off.

“I got bitten,” he whispered, staring back down at his hands; which were fiddling with the soft material pooling around him. 

“You got what?!” Felix replied, volume rising on the last syllable. “Where? Does it hurt? Should I get the herbs? Should I get a doctor?” With each question, Felix sounded more and more concerned, almost desperate. Chan was in no way prepared for that kind of reaction, and when he looked up with confused eyes, Felix was so much closer already - fussing around him, moving his hands as if he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to touch. 

In a burst of sudden confidence, Chan caught Felix’s wrists with his hands to stop him from whatever he was doing. “It’s not deep, and I’m okay. I think,” the witch tried, hoping his voice sounded more confident than his actual words. Wide eyes were staring at his face but landed on the rather poorly concealed wound surrounded by red irritated skin only a second later. 

For a moment Felix merely stared at it, before almost screaming at him “You think?! How can you not be sure if you’re okay?!” 

Oh well, Chan thought, it seemed like this was not reassuring at all for Felix. But before he could even reassure him again, his familiar was already up and storming out of the room. Grumbling something Chan couldn’t understand, although there might have been a few curse words thrown in the mix. He’d already anticipated this conversation would be bad, but it was even worse than his imagination.

Chan grabbed the blankets to pull them back up around him again when Felix reentered - a small jar, a fresh bandage and tape in his hands.

Unceremoniously he plopped down on the bed in front of Chan, holding out his hand. When Chan didn’t react and just continued to stare at Felix’s hand, the only warning he got was a “hrmph” when Felix grabbed his arm, pulling it close to him.

Carefully Felix inspected the sore spots before taking off the band-aids, and Chan watched as Felix’s delicate fingers cleaned the area of any fibres. He allowed his gaze to wander further up, where Felix’s eyebrows were pulled together in total concentration, his lips set in a pout he would love to kiss away. With that last thought, he realised how incredibly close they were sitting; Chan could easily count the freckles adorning his face.

“Well? I’m still waiting for an explanation,” Felix brought him out of his reverie. 

Chan swallowed. Felix still didn’t look up though, giving him all the time he needed to find the right words. Thankful for that, Chan observed as Felix opened the ointment, calming him with his certain but gentle movements. Cautiously he put some on the already inflamed bite marks, making Chan hiss at the contact. Coolness set in just a second later, and he closed his eyes, sighing in relief. 

“It was Hyunjin,” Chan finally uttered, knowing perfectly well, Felix understood what it meant. Chan still didn’t look up, too scared of Felix’s reaction. The latter sitting in front of him staring at the bandage in his hands, lips pursed in thought.

“Hyun...jin. Well okay, it’s not deep, there shouldn’t be any aftereffects,” he mumbled while placing the gauze. And Chan could quite literally see when Felix caught on, his lips popping open, eyebrows raised almost to his hairline. “It’s a full moon today.” He whispered in shock.

Chan let his head drop again; tears were stinging behind his eyes only waiting for him to allow them to fall. His free hand was grabbing the blanket so hard his knuckles were almost white.

“You...” Felix started, but drifted off again, almost robotically wrapping Chan’s arm.

Silence stretched over them like a veil, and it was suffocating Chan. Until he felt small hands trying to coax him to look up. He let Felix guide his head up until he was once again met by his gorgeous eyes now gazing intently at him. Chan couldn’t decipher what Felix thought, but there was definitely pain and confusion in the mix. 

“You will turn into a werewolf, am I right?” 

The question made Chan wince; hurting him more than the little bite marks on his arm. He didn’t trust his vocal cords anymore, so he barely nodded and directed his attention back to his fingers. 

Felix let out a huff. “So what? Then you’ll be a werewolf. Nothing we can’t handle, right?”

That made Chan whip his head up again. Did he hear that, right?

“Wha-what?” he stuttered out, not catching up with what Felix was saying.

“I mean the wet dog smell was not the most pleasant thing, but otherwise I can’t discern it a lot. And for the rest, we know enough about werewolves anyway, and we have friends who can help you through the first changes. Everything else we will just figure out as we go.”

“We,” Chan croaked, still staring at Felix who rambled on and on.

“Of course ‘we’,” Felix looks puzzled at him, now focused on the task in front of him again and cutting off some tape to hold the bandage in place. “Did you think I would leave you alone in all of this?”

This time Chan couldn’t hold back his tears anymore. Big drops were starting to spot his blanket as he looked at Felix, who smiled gently back at him. The familiar reached his hand out, trying to stop Chan’s tears, while he softly continued speaking. 

“Do you remember when I first came to you? I was such a tiny kitten back then,” Chan didn’t know where Felix was going with that story, but it calmed him down to listen to Felix’s deep voice. “You picked me up with the utmost care and looked at me like I was the most perfect thing that could have happened to you. And that was when I decided to never leave your side, come whatever may.” 

“Felix...” Chan started, leaning into Felix’s hand still resting on his cheeks; his tears had run dry since. But before he could utter a single word, Felix continued again.

“And my feelings for you only grew with every moment we spent together. You can’t seriously think I would leave you alone in this.” 

“I know,” Chan sighed. Felix was right, he was stupid to think he’d have to go through it all on his own, “I’m sorry, I should have never doubted you, we’re best friends…”

“Best friends, yeah. But not what I mean right now,” Felix interrupted, an annoyed huff leaving his lips. “You dumbass, I’m in love with you.”

Man, was Chan wrong when he thought that night couldn’t have any more surprises. When he got bitten, he thought he would lose his platonic cuddles. But this. This was amazing. 

But apparently he was silent for too long, only staring at Felix’s face, mouth opening and closing, but not a single word coming out.

“Please tell me I didn’t misinterpret it and you also like me at least a little?” Felix rushed out while he pressed his palms against his gradually reddening face.

“No,” Chan finally croaked, breaking out into a huge smile.

“‘No’ what?” Felix whispered, staring at him through his fingers. And Chan could feel his heart explode in his chest from how endeared he was.

“No, you weren’t wrong,” the witch started, feeling how his cheeks already hurt from smiling so big. “I love you too, Felix.”

It felt so right to say it out loud. As if the missing pieces, at last, found their right place.

Felix let his hands fall into his lap, the blush still high up on his cheeks, but his eyes were a sparkling universe of joy, mirroring the freckles on his cheeks. 

“Okay, then. Can we now finally cuddle again? I can’t sleep otherwise.” Felix tried to pout, but his lips were always slipping back into a breathtaking smile. Feeling the same happiness he could read on his familiar’s face, Chan only nodded. Without thinking, he spread his arms wide and instantly had a giggling Felix jumping into them, almost knocking the laptop and jar of salve off the bed. 

Unfortunately, their tumbling around got shut down immediately when they accidentally bumped Chan’s wound, and he sucked in a sharp breath, just as he felt a sting shooting up his arm. 

Felix started to fuss over him again, rambling apologies mixed with questions of how he could help. And Chan couldn’t hold back the sudden laughter breaking out of him, which made Felix stop dead in his tracks, staring down at him confused.

“I’m sorry,” Chan pressed out between chuckles. “This day was so bad, like complete and utter shit, but then you told me you love me and now everything else suddenly seems incredibly unimportant, it’s hilarious.”

When he gasped for air again, he saw Felix beaming at him. What he didn’t see coming was Felix hitting his leg and nagging “You Dumbass got bitten by a werewolf on a full moon night. That’s the opposite of unimportant.” Despite the reprimand, there wasn’t any bite in his voice.

Chan smirked back at him. “Yeah, but a certain someone told me we would get through it together.”

“Don’t use my words against me.” With an exaggerated sigh he added, “you’re still a dumbass.” 

“I deserved that,” Chan agreed, pouting, “but can we cuddle now?”

He tried doing his best puppy eyes, but he also felt like Felix didn’t need much of an invitation.

“Fine,” Felix concluded, biting his full lips. And Chan could see his eyes flutter down before looking up into his again, “but only if I get a kiss too.”

And who was Chan to say no to that, or Felix in general? So he sat up straight again, cupping Felix’s face in his hands and slowly drew closer. They were still smiling when their lips met, making it hard at first, but Chan wouldn’t have it any other way. He could feel Felix tangling his fingers into his hair, his nails gently scratching the back of his head as he sighed softly into the kiss.

After some time, it could have been hours or merely seconds for all Chan knew, Felix drew back a bit, resting his forehead against Chan’s. A sigh escaped his kiss-swollen lips, and secretly Chan thought he would love to see them like that every day if he was the one causing it.

“Should we, maybe, go to bed? It’s almost 4 am.” 

Chan knew he was right, so he said as much and they broke apart to get ready to lie down. Putting the laptop to the side, turning the lights off and finally lying under the blankets together - Chan’s hurt arm safely above it. Felix snuggled impossibly closer, rubbing his nose against Chan’s chest.

“I love you,” Felix breathed, before pressing his lips to the spot above Chan’s heart. And if he weren’t so tired after this awfully long night, Chan was sure his heart would have exploded right then and there. But as it was, he simply kissed the top of Felix’s head, the smooth blond strands tickling his nose a bit when he breathed in. Again, he was hit by Felix‘s smell, and finally, he found the word to describe it: home. 

For a few moments, Chan just lay there, enjoying the feeling as it settled down in his bones. Sometimes, he thought to himself, a simple hug was enough to make a bad night so much better. And on the brink of falling asleep, with a content smile, he whispered: “I love you too.”