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Jimin is tired of pretending. His friends know it, his manager hears about it every day; he’s exhausted. He’s played along most of his life, always with good excuses: he shouldn’t hinder his career, he would lose fans, what would people think? And yeah, it worked for a while, but not anymore. That’s what he tells his manager and the rest of his close team one monday morning. He’s an established singer, hell, he sells out stadiums in Korea and overseas. He believes he can afford to cut idiots loose.
His manager takes his glasses off and pinches the bridge of his nose between his thumbs.
“There’s no way I can talk you out of it this time?” Sejin asks and Jimin holds his chin up, trying to look as commanding as possible.
“No. It’s time for me to come out.”
The entire team is watching the two of them, barely breathing.
“How do you want to do it?”
“No press conference, it would sound like some sort of scandal. I was thinking of a short video or an interview. Whatever you think is best.”
“An interview sounds good. I think I know who to call.”
Jimin nods, licking his lips. He’s buzzing from the inside, he wants to tell it to the world already. He’s waited long enough.
“But I have one condition.”
He glances at his manager and raises a shoulder.
“What is it?”
“We get you a bodyguard. I’m not leaving you alone in this, you already have enough obsessive fans as it is, let’s not add homophobes to the list.” He says, sternly, and Jimin hates how his will seems to be unwavering.
“No way.” He still says.
“Oh that’s not a suggestion. He’ll be with you at all times. I was thinking of killing two birds in one stone : protect you and get rid of your stalkers.”
“How is a bodyguard going to get rid of the ones who think they’re going to marry me?”
“He’ll be your boyfriend.”
Jimin groans, letting his head fall on the table.
“It keeps getting worse.” He whines. “You want me to get a bodyguard and have him act as my lover… What are the qualifications required for such a job? A karate black belt and an acting degree?”
The day has gone from exciting, full of possibilities, to absolutely constraining in a matter of seconds.
“I knew this day would come, I already have someone.”
“Of course you do...” Jimin finally sits back again in his chair, sighing. He hates and loves that about Sejin. He’s always prepared for everything. “It’s my turn to ask, is there any way I can talk you out of it?”
Sejin smiles, patting his hand.
“No. I’m putting you in touch with the interviewer as soon as I get the greenlight from her and you’ll be hearing from your bodyguard during the week.”
Jimin stretches, pinching his lips.
“I should ask for a raise.” He tells Sejin and his manager laughs.
“You and me both.” He replies.
“But, okay, one last thing.” Jimin grabs Sejin’s index, pulling it towards him. “Won’t me dating bring even more unwanted attention?” It’s his last card.
“It’s attention we can control.”
Jimin ruffles his hair, annoyed.
“Okay. Fine. He better not be boring.”
“Not even hot?” Sejin laughs.
“Beauty lasts for a while, boredom is eternal.”
_____
The interview is scheduled for next week. A week has already passed since Jimin announced his decision to Sejin and the team. Time seems to be drawing on and he’s feeling antsy. He’s pacing in his flat most of the time, tries baking four different cakes in the span of two days and is in the middle of cooking a fifth one when his doorbell rings.
He looks up from the oven, frowning. He’s not expecting anyone.
He walks up to his door still wearing an oven mitt on his left hand and his apron and opens it without thinking.
There’s a man with a huge bag standing in front of him.
“Can I help you?” Jimin says with a hesitant smile.
“I’m Min Yoongi, your bodyguard.”
Jimin blinks a few times before laughing.
“ You’re my bodyguard?”
He can’t help it, he doubles over in laughter, hitting his knee with his gloved hand.
“Ah, but you’re so frail and small… ”
He stands up and before he realizes what’s happening, the man has grabbed his free hand and turned him around, locking his arm behind his back. Jimin’s flushed against him and he can’t move.
“I may be small, but so are you , and it doesn’t stop me from being fast.”
He lets him go and Jimin glares at him, getting back his oven mitt that fell on the floor.
“Where should I put my stuff?” Min Yoongi asks, inviting himself in.
“What do you mean where you should put your stuff?”
“Didn’t they tell you?” He says, looking annoyed.
“Tell me what?” And Jimin’s starting to feel annoyed as well.
“I’m staying with you. Making sure obsessive fans don’t try and break in.”
“That’s so over the top, seriously…”
“Just doing what is asked of me.”
Jimin’s shoulders hunch. He gives up.
“I have a guest room.” He tells him, guiding him through the flat.
He lets his bodyguard put his bag on his bed and figures he should maybe apologize.
“Hey… Maybe we got off the wrong foot.”
The man glances at him.
“You think?” He replies and Jimin huffs.
“Maybe I didn’t have to call you frail and small.”
“Are you saying that now that you know I can and will fight you if necessary?” He asks. His tone is serious but he’s sporting a lopsided smile.
“Fighting me? That’s sexy.” Jimin raises his eyebrows and he sees Yoongi huffing, closing his eyes.
He watches him unpack, and, after a while, his phone rings.
“Do you want some cake, Min Yoongi-nim?”
The man laughs.
“Yoongi-ssi is good enough, and, yes, I’d love some cake.”
He follows him in the kitchen as Jimin takes the cake out and removes it from the mould.
“Please, have a seat.” Jimin gestures vaguely but Yoongi understands and pulls out a bar stool.
He cuts two slices and puts them in plates, one for him, one for his guest. He leans on the counter, pointing at Yoongi with his spoon.
“So you’re my shadow as of now?”
“So it seems.” Yoongi replies coolly, taking a bite. “Very good carrot cake. Would’ve hated to have it burn by drawing my armlock on any longer.”
“I should’ve gotten a file before you got there, to get to know you.”
“That’s what this week’s for. And I got a file.”
Jimin feels cheated.
“That’s unfair. What kind of info did you get?”
“Park Jimin, 25, born in Busan, global superstar.”
Jimin nods.
“Always let you win at board games.”
Jimin makes an outraged face.
“How is it top priority information?”
Yoongi shrugs, grinning and he’s got a gummy smile. It’s kinda cute.
“Also learned that you liked to pout.”
“I don’t !” He says, before realizing he’s currently pouting.
Yoongi laughs and it isn’t a terrible laugh. Jimin can live with this kind of laugh for the next few months. It’s a happy and sunny kind of laughter, one that warms your heart. Jimin’s pretty sure Hoseok would love it.
“Honestly, I don’t have that much information. I was joking about the file, I simply looked you up on the web. Did you know you are famous?” He asks, still grinning and Jimin can’t help but grin as well.
“Guess you’re right and we’re gonna have to perfect our act. Hope you like slumber parties.”
“Depends if there’s whiskey.”
Jimin huffs.
“I can get us whiskey.”
_____
After they’ve eaten dinner together, Jimin knows a few more things about Yoongi. He learns he has a brother, grew up in Daegu, is a couple years older than him, loves music and has a poodle. He even shows him pictures of him. He’s called Holly. That’s where they’re at when they decide they should just ask questions to each other at this point. Jimin brings glasses to the coffee table and they sit on the rug, facing each other as Yoongi uncorks the whiskey.
Jimin puts on some music and judging from Yoongi’s face, he mustn’t like lo-fi. He rolls his eyes.
“What do you want to listen to?”
“I didn’t say anything.” Yoongi replies, shrugging.
“I can tell that you don’t like it. I’m not blind.”
“Fine, I prefer hip-hop.”
“See? That wasn’t so hard?”
Yoongi ignores him and pours them drinks.
Jimin starts playing an old Epik High album.
As soon as the first notes start, Yoongi raises his head.
“Better?”
“The best.” He says and raises his glass.
Jimin cheers.
“So, how come you’re a bodyguard?”
“I wanted to be a spy but they were full.” He says seriously, but Jimin sees how he’s holding a smile back.
Jimin snorts.
“What about you? Why are you an idol?” Yoongi asks, taking a sip from his drink.
“Should I joke about it as well?” Jimin replies, staring at his glass.
“Maybe I’ll ask you again after a few other glasses.”
“Yeah, let’s do this and start easy.” He says, drinking most of the whiskey in a go.
“Not the type to savor good alcohol. Duly noted.” Yoongi notes, drinking again a small sip, relishing in the drink.
“Not when we have six days to get to know each other well enough to convince the entire country we’re dating. If you want my secrets, it won’t be sober.”
Yoongi snorts and pours him another glass.
“Why did you even take the job? Are you even gay to go through this whole ordeal?”
Yoongi raises an eyebrow, drinks and puts his glass down.
“Your team approached me. I am discreet and efficient. They liked that about me. I knew about you, like everyone, but I actually knew you well enough they thought I’d do the job. Also I’m handsome.”
Jimin laughs. He doesn’t know if he’s joking or not but he likes it.
“And to answer your question, yes I’m gay. I’m committed to my job but not to the point of faking an entire sexuality.”
Jimin nods.
“Why come out?” Yoongi asks him, finishing his first glass, pouring himself another one. “Not that you shouldn’t, I think that’s admirable, but I’m wondering.”
The singer shrugs, drinking more.
“I don’t like lying and I have been forced to for the past years. I figured if someone in the industry was able to come out right now, it would be me. My career’s skyrocketing, if it’s not now, it’s never going to happen. I want to open a door for other artists to come out as well, and, honestly, I just want to be free to live my life the way I want to.”
Yoongi raises his glass and they both cheer again, this time downing both of their drinks in a go.
He pours again.
“Okay. Easy questions now.” Jimin says. “You’re stranded and can only bring one movie. Go.”
“The Raid.” Yoongi answers without hesitating. Jimin nods, agreeing. “You?”
“I love action movies with my entire being but I have to say I’ll never get tired of The Notebook.”
Yoongi barks out a laugh before patting Jimin’s shoulder.
“It’s good to get emotional. Let’s just hope we don’t get stranded together.” He drinks. “A book?”
“One Piece.”
“There’s over ninety volumes, that’s cheating!”
“It’s a very long book... “
Yoongi sighs.
“I’m taking a short book. About Her.”
“Isn’t that from that Yoshimoto author?” Jimin asks, leaning in and Yoongi looks up, eyes shining.
“You know her?”
“My friend Namjoon has been pestering me with her for the past three years.”
“Oh.” Yoongi looks disappointed but it disappears quickly, replaced with a smile. “Cat or dog?”
“Cat.”
“Dog.” Yoongi underlines his answer, in a way that makes it feel like it’s the only possible option.
“We’re not going to go along well. Style or comfort?”
“Comfort.”
Jimin scrunches his nose.
“The right answer was style.”
“In my work field that is not the correct answer.”
Jimin laughs softly. He’s starting to feel warm and relaxed. He lets his fingers run on the rug, gently smiling at Yoongi.
“What?” He asks, frowning.
“Just thinking about the fact that you aren’t ugly.”
Yoongi barks out a laugh.
“I’m pretty sure that was a requirement to be your fake boyfriend.”
Jimin nods, staring at his glass, losing himself in his thoughts.
“So, why did you become an idol?”
“I see you’re persistent.” He sighs. “I wanted to be an artist and I loved singing and dancing. It seemed perfect. My goal has always been to create music and the more secret one was to give hope to people like me out there.”
“LGBT people?”
“Yeah. I’ve been waiting for a very long time for this very moment.”
They drink more.
Jimin lies back on the rug, stares at the ceiling.
“Who are you when people aren’t looking?”
“That’s a question for when we get married.”
Jimin gets on his elbows and glares at him.
“Okay, okay. I’ll answer.” He replies, smiling to himself. “I guess I’m kind of shy, I’m more tender than meets the eye and my friends usually tell me I’m akin to a cat.”
“That’s it?”
“I deal with depression and anxiety, but that’s okay.”
“Good to know, and also not something I will reveal during an interview.”
Yoongi nods.
“What about you?”
Jimin closes his eyes.
“I’m a lot more insecure than what I try to show. Used to struggle with eating, kind of went on too many diets but it’s better now. Otherwise, I’m a closeted One Piece fan. I even have a Nami figurine.”
Yoongi stares at him.
“You could’ve had a Zoro one and you chose Nami.”
Jimin snorts and Yoongi starts laughing with him.
When their laughter dies off, Jimin straightens up, checks his phone for the hour.
“We should shower, it’s getting late.”
Yoongi nods.
“Should I go first?” He asks, and Jimin stands up, the room swaying a little.
“Follow me.”
They walk to Jimin’s room and Yoongi stops in his tracks, staring at something.
“What is it?” He asks and Yoongi scoffs.
“You have a couch in your room?”
Jimin shrugs.
“I want to be able to watch TV in bed or on my couch, depending on my mood.”
Yoongi shakes his head, and disdainfully mutters:
“Rich people…”
“Hmm?” Jimin asks, not sure he’s heard correctly.
“Nothing. Where’s the bathroom?”
Jimin leads him to the other room, giving him fresh towels, and he leaves him alone, plopping on his bed. He covers his eyes with his arms and the room starts spinning.
He dozes off listening to the shower running.
Yoongi wakes him up some time later, shaking his foot with his hand.
Jimin groans.
“I’m going, I’m going.” He says, blinking, a bit disoriented.
He hasn’t taken a shower in this state in a while. He wouldn’t say he’s drunk but he’s way beyond tipsy. Showering is at the same time a hassle and something ridiculously funny. He thinks he’s slower than usual, focused and ultimately too tired to properly function.
When he gets out of the bathroom twenty minutes later, he stops in his tracks, staring at Yoongi who stares at him back, disconcerted.
One thing. There’s a duvet on his couch. Two things. He’s forgotten to put a shirt on.
Yongi furiously blinks, frozen for a second, before he grabs Jimin’s shirt on his bed and throws it to him.
“Why is there a duvet on my couch?” Jimin finally asks when he’s fully dressed.
“You’re not sleeping alone.”
“Uh. I am.”
Yoongi sits on the couch and hides his legs under the covers.
“No you’re not.”
“That’s ridiculous.” Jimin groans. “I’m not even coming out before a few days, and even after that, what are the odds of me getting attacked in my sleep?”
“Are you questioning my work ethic?” Yoongi asks sternly.
“Well yes ! I am.”
“You should get to bed. Get some rest. Things might get hectic during the next few weeks.”
Great, he’s stubborn. That makes two of them.
Jimin sighs, turns off the light and gets in bed.
“You’re gonna bust your back.” He says after a while.
“Nothing my body can’t take.” Yoongi replies and Jimin’s done fighting. He just wants to sleep.
“Night.” He tells him.
“See you in the morning.”
_____
Jimin wakes up to the sound of his alarm and it pierces through his skull. He whines, turning it off, realizing he has a headache. Figures he didn’t drink enough water last night. He jumps when he sees movement at the end of his bed. Fuck. Yoongi. He’s not used to not being alone in his flat, let alone in his own room.
Yoongi sits up and his hair is unruly, hair strands sticking up. It’s kind of endearing.
They stare at each other.
“Mornin’.” Yoongi rasps out and his morning voice is low, kind of seductive. Jimin likes it.
He hums, not awake enough to talk yet, and rolls out of bed, hiding himself in an oversized sweater.
He drinks two glasses of water before Yoongi joins him wearing flannel pants and a black hoodie, eyes half closed, pouting. Jimin pours him a glass and pats his shoulder.
“Coffee?” He asks and Yoongi’s eyes fully open.
“Yes, please.”
“How do you take it?”
“Black, lots of it.”
It makes him laugh. He prepares his own mug, lots of milk, some sugar, and starts the coffee machine.
Jimin scrolls on his phone for a while, waiting for the pot to fill. He steals glances at Yoongi here and there. He has a hard time processing this man’s here to protect him, even less than him being his fake boyfriend for who knows how long.
Jimin pours them two mugs and goes to sit in front of him.
“Slept well?” He asks, smirking, fully knowing he couldn’t have possibly gotten a decent night of sleep.
“Like a charm, thanks.”
He’s polite, then.
They don’t talk much as they drink their coffee. Good. Jimin isn’t a morning person.
_____
Sejin calls him during the afternoon and underlines something Jimin hadn’t thought of. They need to have a story. Jimin can’t just say that he has a boyfriend and then vanish without any other explanation. Sejin leaves him the freedom to choose any backstory he’d like, asks him for a report once he’s done and then hangs up on him.
He must look distraught because Yoongi closes the book he’s reading and asks him what’s going on.
“You’re up for some roleplay?” Jimin replies sternly, looking into the distance.
Yoongi doesn’t react for a second, it would be fun if they weren’t in this situation.
“Excuse me?” He finally says.
“We need a cover story, you and me, our idyllic and passionate love affair.”
Yoongi gently puts his book on the coffee table before slowly sighing, rubbing his palms against his thighs.
“We’re gonna need more coffee for this.”
Jimin huffs and brings their mugs to the table, sitting next to Yoongi.
“Okay, so, how could we have met?” He says, sliding a foot under his thigh.
“I don’t know, what do you do when you’re not busy touring around the world?”
“I see my friends, I go back to my hometown, I hit the gym...We could’ve met at the gym.”
Yoongi scrunches his nose.
“That’s way too horny.”
“How is the gym too horny?” Jimin wheezes.
“You really want to tell people we noticed each other while we were panting and sweaty?” Yoongi raises an eyebrow and Jimin winces.
“Gross.” He says, and he sounds equal parts amused and disgusted.
“Yeah.”
“But I can see where you’re coming from, saying it’s horny.”
“Thank you.”
“We could always say you were one of my backup dancers?” Jimin suggests, shrugging.
“And have people ask me to dance?” He scoffs, shaking his head.
“Surely you’re not bad?”
“Not good enough to be paid to dance, no.”
“Show me.” Jimin teases, poking Yoongi’s shoulder with his finger.
“No.” The answer is immediate.
“Please.”
“What if we’d met in Busan while you were visiting your family?”
“I see you don’t want to dance for me.”
Yoongi crosses his arms and simply stares at Jimin.
“Okay, Busan, understood.” Jimin complies, still smiling. “Then, what, you were visiting while I was in town? I was at my favorite café, saw a handsome man sitting next to me and started talking with him?”
“Yeah, actually.”
Jimin considers it for a second and hums.
“Fair. I could do that.”
“Hit on strangers?”
“If they’re as hot as you? Yeah, why not.”
The shade of crimson Yoongi turns into is worth it. And he’s not lying, Yoongi’s pleasant to look at. He’s starting to like him even if he’s fed up beyond reason over the entire ordeal, but that’s not his fault.
“So, we met in Busan and you hit on me?”
“Yeah.”
“When? A year ago?”
“Make it a year and half, I was actually in Busan then, and if you’re living with me, a year’s a bit too short.”
“Because six more months makes it better?”
“Young love.” Jimin gestures vaguely and Yoongi laughs.
“I noticed you because you ordered three coffees in the span of half-an-hour. Of course, you were handsome, but also hypercaffeinated.”
Yoongi dismissively waves his hand.
“Go on.”
“We talked for a while, about the city, why you’d come to visit my hometown, you were surprisingly chill about me being, you know, famous.”
“Of course I would be. Do I seem impressed right now?”
“Not enough, no.” Jimin complains, making puppy eyes at Yoongi. They both laugh.
“I guess I would ask you on a date, I’d shoot my shot. And by the way, I need your number for real, in case we get separated.”
Jimin hands him his unlocked phone, Yoongi calls his number, gives it back to him.
“I’d say yes to the date because I can’t say no to– wait, is that a tangerine?”
Yoongi is peeling a tangerine.
“Yes.”
“I don’t have tangerines at home.”
“Pity. Thankfully I’ve brought my own.”
Jimin blinks a few times before exploding with laughter.
“Where were you hiding it?”
“In my pocket.”
“Your pocket. Ok I definitely agreed on a date with a man who hides tangerines in his pockets.”
“That’s your official story?” Yoongi asks, eating his damn fruit.
“The closer to the truth, the better. Do you always have tangerines with you?”
“Hmm. Yeah.”
“What if you have to fight?”
“Tangerine accidents have happened in the past.”
Jimin’s laughing so much he’s now crying, has to wipe the tears away. Yoongi looks so serious, he can’t take it.
“Okay.” He says, trying to calm down. He breathes out. “Okay. So I agree to the date and you’re staying in town for a few days so we go to that tiny restaurant that I like with a view on the sea.”
“I find you charming, a bit judgemental but charming nonetheless.” Yoongi replies and Jimin hits his shoulder. “And we agree to see each other back in Seoul.”
“Yeah but I had a tour after that, so we kept in touch, messaged every day.”
“I like cat emojis.”
Jimin snorts and goes straight back to crying, laughing so much his stomach hurts.
“What?” Yoongi tries to be mad but he’s grinning, gums showing, and it’s absolutely endearing.
“Nothing, nothing, you’re just cute, that’s all.”
“So.” Yoongi scratches his nape, still smiling. “I send you texts.”
“With cat emojis.” Jimin says, now kneeling on the couch, fully in Yoongi’s personal space.
“Yes. When did you come back to Seoul?”
“A year ago.”
“So we started seeing each other in secret a year ago.”
“Yeah. We meet at your place, away from the paparazzis.”
“Fine with me, you’ll be glad to know I live in Seongsu-dong.”
“Oh. Hipster.”
“Shut up.”
“Make me.”
Jimin sees from the corner of his eyes a tremor in Yoongi’s hands. He wonders what he would’ve done. He smirks.
“Do we need anything else?” Jimin says, lying on his back, head pressed against Yoongi’s side.
“I think we’re good.”
“Guess we have to learn more about each other then.”
Yoongi nods and lifts his hand, putting it on Jimin’s lips.
“Just give me a minute break, and maybe another coffee.”
Jimin laughs.
_____
They spend the next days cooped up at home, mostly talking. Yoongi’s actually a very fun and nice person to talk to Jimin realizes, and he feels almost sorry for mocking him upon meeting him. Of course, the situation isn’t ideal, but they’re making the most out of it. He stops being afraid of Yoongi at the end of his bed when he wakes up after a few days. It’s a bit weird but he’s getting used to it.
By the time Tuesday comes, they’ve developed a semblance of routine. Jimin will take care of the coffee while Yoongi prepares breakfast. He’s fast and clean, Jimin likes to have him in his kitchen. He doesn’t let things wander around like Seokjin or Jungkook. Then, they do their things, have lunch together, and spend their afternoon together. They talk about their lives, their cover story, pretty much anything that comes to mind while Jimin tries stress baking every recipe he finds online.
Sejin picks them up Tuesday afternoon with suits for them both.
“There will be a photoshoot.” He says, and Jimin sees Yoongi stiffen immediately.
He wraps an arm around his shoulder, smiling.
“Relax, handsome, it’s gonna be fine.”
He sighs but still disappears to change.
It turns out Yoongi in a suit is pretty much devastating news for Jimin. He just stares at him for a few seconds, words knocked out from his mouth.
“What?” He asks and Jimin grins.
“You look amazing.”
“Well you too but you know that.” He replies, and Jimin can see the tinge of pink on his cheeks before he turns around to grab his jacket. Oh. Jimin makes a mental note. Yoongi has a stellar ass.
Yoongi catches his stare and Jimin flushes, clearing his throat.
“Let’s go?” He says, hoarsely and Yoongi smirks . Jimin wants to fight him. Maybe kind of kiss him too but now’s not the time to think about it.
He prepared his questions with care, talked about his answers with Sejin over the phone, trained with Yoongi, lying on his bed staring at him upside down while Yoongi sat at the edge of the mattress.
He’s ready.
The interviewer is nice. She works for a big magazine. Jimin knows that what he’s doing is not going to be swept under the rug. Soon enough he’ll be under the spotlights and it won’t be because of his music. Her introductory questions cover his last album, she asks him about projects for a new one, his feelings about his european tour, questions about producing and songwriting. Those he’s used to. But then she slowly changes topics, and Jimin can feel his heart trying to crawl out of his ribcage. He swallows. He knows she knows why they’re here and they keep tiptoeing for a few more terrible minutes before she finally tells him about the fact that he has a large LGBT fanbase overseas. How does he explain it? He tells her about writing gender neutral love songs for years, frequently showing his support, small things that can explain the trust his fans have in him. Actually, he wouldn’t be where he's at if it weren’t for them. She asks him to explain what he means. It’s time to take the plunge.
“I’ve been thinking of speaking up for years. The support I received from my fans finally gave me the courage to come out. I like men. I’ve always been gay bout various factors kept me from coming out, mostly because I was afraid of homophobia. It’s a harsh industry to navigate. When I was younger, I didn’t even think it would be possible because of the rampant violence that even permeated our trainees’ dorms. It wasn’t easy. Even after I debuted, I was only promised a downfall if I ever came out.
“Aren’t you afraid it will impact your existence and career?” She asks him and he hums.
“I’m tired of living hidden, like there’s something to be ashamed of. I guess I want to be the change I wish to see. I’m ready to take the risk.”
They talk about the stigma around LGBT people in the country and he tells her he wishes him coming out will encourage others to speak up and come out, that it will somewhat help normalizing what is a matter of love and not of disgrace. He then addresses a message to his fans, telling them to hang on, that better days are ahead of them, that he wishes them to live truthfully and that he’s there for them. She asks him if he has been able to date and Jimin smiles. Why, yes . He says. He’s been seeing someone for the past year and half. They just moved in together. And there comes the carefully crafted alibi. He tells her about Yoongi, everything they prepared, small trivia they came up with. Everything goes as planned. They end the interview talking about the next album’s preparations. Once they’re done, she congratulates him, tells him he’s very brave, and she wishes him all the luck against bigots.
Once they’re done with the interview, Yoongi’s brought on set and the photographer gives them indications. Jimin’s used to it but Yoongi’s tense. He runs his hand on his back, whispering to him that it’s not going to last long. The camera clicks. Jimin guesses he’ll have candid pictures. Jimin keeps talking to Yoongi, mostly telling him jokes to help him loosen up. It works, and soon enough they’re laughing on set. It goes smoothly after that.
Now they have to wait another three days before the article’s published.
_____
They’re having their morning coffee when the article’s published.
“It’s out.” Jimin says, nervous and stiff.
He opens the link and throws his phone on the table, shaking his head.
“Just gonna pour us our coffee before I admit I’ve unleashed hell. There’s no way I’m going through this without any caffeine in my system.”
Yoongi sleepily gets up from his chair and walks up to Jimin.
“Come here.” He says and Jimin’s surprised.
Yoongi hugs him. Jimin’s seen him initiate small contacts but never something like that. He likes it, lets himself relax.
“What if I’m making a mistake?” He croaks out, terrified.
“You’re not. It’s okay to be afraid. This is something you’ve wanted for a long time. It means a lot to you and to other people like us out there. It’s not a mistake.” Yoongi’s fingers thread in Jimin’s hair and Jimin lets himself think about him for a moment. He’s known him for a couple weeks only and he’s already come to trust him. He’ll lie if he says he hasn’t thought about kissing him to shut him up whenever he riles him up, and maybe just maybe that one time Yoongi showed him at least five different techniques to immobilize someone kind of made him horny. Yoongi has some kind of effect on him. He’s happy he’s the one he ended up with, even if it’s fake.
He squares up.
“Okay. Okay, let’s do it.”
Yoongi lets go and Jimin pours them their drinks before sitting next to him.
They read the interview together and scroll through the pictures. Most of them are the ones that were taken while they were talking and laughing. There’s not a single picture where they’re not touching each other. A hand around the waist, on the shoulder, fingers grazing, and Jimin realizes they never agreed on acting this way during the photoshoot. It was genuine. And from the way he looks at Yoongi in the pictures, one could definitely think he’s in love with him. Shit. Maybe he’s getting too involved in this. Maybe he’s let himself bask too much in Yoongi’s presence, the way he makes him laugh, the curve of his neck when he cranes it as he gets on his tiptoes to reach the kitchen’s top shelves, the way Jimin’s heart skips a beat when Yoongi takes his hands off the controller with his delicate fingers after Jimin’s been playing for hours and is starting to get really angry every time he dies.
Yoongi’s silent next to him, lips pursed.
“You okay?” Jimin asks.
“Yeah. We look good.” He says, softly, still looking at the pictures.
“I’d say our dating debut started off pretty well.”
“We should’ve kissed to piss the homophobes off.”
Jimin snorts.
“Let’s do this while we’re on live television so they can’t cut it out.”
Yoongi extends a hand and Jimin shakes it.
They have breakfast while Jimin sees his social media explode with notifications, tons of new articles coming out singling out the part where he comes out, tabloids publishing their pictures. He receives lots of congratulating tweets, support from LGBT people, more than the menaces, the disgust and hate, the fans who feel betrayed. He really did it. He came out. After an hour of scrolling, Yoongi takes his phone out of his hands and forces him to go with him to the gym to keep his mind busy.
Going to the gym does occupy his mind , just not in the way he’d wished. He spends most of the time trying not to trip on the running mill, absolutely mesmerized by Yoongi using the bench press. He’s lifting like he’s handling something light and not the equivalent of his own weight. He wonders how much strength he hides behind his lithe musculature. He loses himself in the daydream of Yoongi carrying him to bed, or lifting him up against a wall until the other man brings him back to reality.
“You okay?” He asks, lifting his shirt to wipe the sweat away from his face. Jimin can’t help looking at his stomach. It looks soft, biteable. Not helping.
“Yeah. Just distracted.” He smiles, stopping the machine and stepping away from it, starting to stretch.
Yoongi walks up to him.
“Need a hand?” He asks and Jimin hums.
Yoongi presses his hands on his back, helping stretch his back.
Jimin’s body’s tingling, the fantasy lingers and merges with Yoongi’s fingers on his skin. Jimin closes his eyes, tries to think about anything else than a man who could probably break him in two if he asked him to. He straightens up before sitting down, spreading his legs and asking for Yoongi’s help. He sits in front of him and grabs his hands, pulls towards him. Jimin’s supple. In a matter of seconds, his nose is touching the ground. He holds the position for a minute, and when he goes back to sitting, Yoongi’s gaze is trained on him, his cheeks are pinker than they were before. Jimin likes this look on him.
They stay silent for a second, holding hands, staring at each other. Yoongi’s still flushed with effort, hair disheveled. Jimin’s using all his willpower not to get on his knees and crawl to kiss him. He knows he shouldn’t get ahead of himself but it’s been so long since he’s met someone like Yoongi, someone who doesn’t put up with his shit, isn’t afraid of voicing his opinions even if it means arguing for half an hour over the dumbest thing, and yet he’s gentle and attentive, careful of Jimin’s wellbeing. Yes, Jimin has a crush on his bodyguard but he doesn’t feel like one, to Jimin, he looks more like a friend.
“Feeling better?” Yoongi asks, thumbs brushing over his knuckles, and Jimin beams at him.
“Like a charm, thank you.”
Yoongi stretches his neck, exposing his throat.
Okay maybe Jimin doesn’t want to get railed by his friends but the point still stands.
“You know what we should do?” Jimin says before he can think any better.
“What?” Yoongi says, still stretching his neck, eyes lidded.
“We should kiss.”
Yoongi blinks a few times, laughing.
“No.” He says, looking amused.
“Yeah, well, do you want us to look all stiff and awkward the day we have to kiss in front of people, or worse, in front of a camera?”
Yoongi purses his lips, looking away.
“Let’s say you have a point.” He vaguely waves a hand in the air. “I’m not kissing you all sweaty in a gym.”
“How romantic.” Jimin teases him, poking his stomach with his index. Yoongi catches his hand.
They’re grinning.
“We’ll train at home. After a shower.”
“I’m not sure seeing you under the shower is a very romantic move before a first kiss.”
“You know I could put you in a headlock right now if I wanted to.” Yoongi warns him.
“Sexy.” Jimin replies, rolling out of Yoongi’s reach before he decides to put his threat into practice.
_____
Jimin’s drying his hair after his shower when his phone rings. It’s a video call. He puts his phone against his mirror and answers. His friends appear on screen.
“Hi guys!” He says, and he sees the pixelated faces of Seokjin, Namjoon, Hoseok, Jungkook and Taehyung.
“Park Jimin, this is an intervention.” Seokjin says.
“You have a boyfriend and you didn’t tell us.” Hoseok continues.
“We’re wounded.” Taehyung goes on.
“Calm down guys, I was about to tell you when we met on Friday.”
“A text would’ve been nice.” Jungkook replies.
“He’s not my boyfriend actually. He’s my bodyguard. Sejin thought I might need protection after coming out.”
There’s a moment of silence.
“He’s very hot, you’re sure you don’t want him to be your boyfriend?” Namjoon asks and they all start laughing.
Jimin looks outside of the bathroom, sees Yoongi reading on the couch. He smiles.
“Anyway, we’re still on for Friday?” He says instead.
They all agree and Jimin tells them he’ll explain the whole story when they meet up.
“And bring him too!” Hoseok concludes right before hanging up.
When Jimin walks in the bedroom, Yoongi looks up from his book.
“Vaguely heard your phone call, what am I being roped into?”
“Dinner with my friends on Friday.” Yoongi raises a finger. “Non negotiable.”
“Do I have to wear a suit again?”
“It’s not a formal thing, no.” Jimin replies, sitting on the couch next to him.
“I was thinking, when you were under the shower. Maybe we should practice being more familiar with physical contact.” Yoongi changes the subject, eyes trained on the page he’s reading. “Aside from kissing, I mean.”
The tip of his ears are red. It’s cute.
“I don’t mind but I get the feeling you’re a bit more reserved?”
“I take time to warm up to people.”
“Let’s start small then. What do you like?”
“Holding hands.” His answer is immediate. “But I’m going to make an effort, get out of my comfort zone.”
“Don’t do anything you don’t want to.” Jimin tells him, that’s the last thing he wants.
“I don’t mind.” He says, closing his book, putting it on the table. “Should we train?” He turns towards him.
“Now?” Jimin replies, suddenly feeling a bit shy.
“Do you want us to create a kissing event in our plans and coordinate when the time comes?” Yoongi teases and Jimin huffs.
“Fine.”
They stare at each other for a while, silent. Yoongi moves his hand on the couch until it reaches Jimin’s fingers. He leans in and Jimin follows the movement, tilts his head and closes his eyes. The kiss is tentative, lips barely grazing. Yoongi’s lips are soft, a bit chafed. They part for a second and Jimin scoots a bit closer, kisses him again. Yoongi kisses back. They’re being shy. Jimin huffs and Yoongi imitates him.
“Definitely not buying it.” Jimin says, voice almost a whisper, lips flirting with Yoongi’s as he speaks.
Yoongi’s free hand finds Jimin’s face, fingers tickling his nape, thumb pressing against his jaw. Jimin leans in and this time, the kiss is less tentative, they’re smiling but kissing nonetheless. Their positions are awful, they’re both bending, craning their necks to properly kiss. Jimin’s getting frustrated. He moves on the couch, kneeling. Yoongi winces.
“Your neck?” Jimin asks.
“Yeah.”
Jimin doesn’t let himself think about it.
“You said you wanted more physical contact?” He tells him and climbs over his lap. Yoongi’s eyebrows shoot up but he’s smiling as his hands find his waist. “Okay?” Jimin still asks.
“Okay.”
Jimin cradles Yoongi’s face in his hands and decides that now ’s the moment he’s going to wing it. If he has to fuel the kiss with the crush he harbors for him, then so be it. Let the man have a taste of what it means to be the subject of Jimin’s desire. He lets his thumb catch against Yoongi’s bottom lip. Yoongi’s a bit wide-eyed. Jimin leans in and kisses with intent this time, gently biting Yoongi’s lip. It seems to do the trick because Yoongi straightens up, holding Jimin’s waist more firmly. Their kiss gets messier, like they’re actually enjoying it, and, honestly? The moment Yoongi turns the kiss into a french one, Jimin starts to fully relax, hell, get into it. He slides a hand in Yoongi’s hair, gently tugs and he can hear Yoongi take in a sharp breath. He smiles into the kiss. A second later, Yoongi retaliates, hands sliding up his back, pressing him closer to him. His grip gets firmer and Jimin shivers. He likes being manhandled a little. Yoongi’s a good kisser. He does things with his tongue Jimin can’t really explain. It feels like dancing, like they’re chasing each other, playfully, with an underlying tension building up his spine. By now, Jimin’s totally forgotten the initial goal, he’s lost in the kiss, sucking on Yoongi’s bottom lip, losing himself in the way he can feel Yoongi’s blunt nails on his back. Jimin rocks his hips. It’s an accident. He let himself get into it too much, forget that whatever he feels isn’t a mutual thing and he’s painfully reminded when Yoongi’s hands still on his back, when Jimin opens his eyes and Yoongi looks like a deer caught in headlights.
“I should go buy dinner.” Yoongi says and all the desire and want that had taken all of the space in Jimin’s body gets tainted with deception and a bit of shame.
“Sure.” He replies, tries to sound casual as he gets away from Yoongi, suddenly feeling colder than he was a few seconds ago.
“I think we made progress.” Yoongi tells him, with a smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes. It makes Jimin want to crawl under a rock.
“Yeah.” He manages uttering instead.
Yoongi puts on a vest, takes his keys and leaves the flat.
Jimin sighs, threading his fingers in his hair. Fuck. He lies on the couch. He shouldn’t have lost control. He guesses he’ll just have to act as usual, not let his emotions get the upper hand.
_____
Yoongi acts like nothing out of the ordinary happened between them. Jimin’s both relieved and a bit wounded. He tries to tone down the flame of his crush. It’s hard though, because Yoongi didn’t lie, he’s being more tactile. Jimin helps him cook and he puts a hand on his hip as he leans over him to retrieve the salt. He puts his hand on his cheek during dinner and brushes away crumbs with his thumb. Jimin’s not sure how he’s going to survive this.
They watch a movie together after dinner, flushed against one another, legs overlapping as Yoongi comments on the fact that the stunts aren’t exactly truthful. It makes Jimin laugh.
It’s when they’re about to go to bed that Jimin notices it, the way in which Yoongi holds his back with a hand, how he winces as he leans to unfold the covers.
“I knew it.” Jimin says and Yoongi looks up, confused. “The couch is busting your back.”
Yoongi opens his mouth but he doesn’t utter a word.
“You’re not sleeping in it anymore.”
“I’m not sleeping in the other room.” Yoongi replies, crossing his arms.
“No, you’re going to sleep in my fucking bed.” Jimin says matter-of-factly, leaving no room for discussion. “This isn’t up for debate.”
“I don’t want to bother.” Yoongi still tries.
“And I don’t want you not being able to protect me if necessary because you’re being stubborn .”
Yoongi sighs.
“Fine. But I’m a cover hoarder.”
“So am I, let the fight begin.”
They both huff and Yoongi relaxes, letting go of his duvet.
Jimin gets under the covers, letting half of the bed to Yoongi who turns off the lights and joins him.
They lie there in the dark, silent, for a while, until Jimin thinks he’s fallen asleep.
“I think that’s brave, you coming out, being true to yourself and inspiring others despite the hardships and risks.” Yoongi whispers and Jimin turns on his side, looking at him.
“It’s mostly selfish, just wanted to be free.”
“Still.” Yoongi replies, turning on his side as well. “Aren’t you sad?”
“Why would I be?”
“Well, you pretending to be with me kind of goes against the concept of being free. Unless you have a fake affair with a true lover.”
Jimin huffs.
“It’s okay. I’ll figure it out.”
What he truly wants to tell him is that he’d like to try it out with him. He’s not sure they’re meant to be, but he’d like to know. He hasn’t let himself fall for anyone in years and it took him by surprise, the way he grew attached to Yoongi so quickly. He doesn’t regret it though.
“Plus, I get to know you.” Jimin continues and Yoongi lets out a small laugh.
“Amazing, befriending your bodyguard.”
Jimin pokes his ribs.
“Like you don’t tolerate me.”
Yoongi grins, his gums showing.
“It’s okay, I guess.”
Jimin gently hits Yoongi’s foot with his.
“Come on.”
The other groans softly.
“Okay, fine, I like you.”
“Yeah? Why’s that?” Jimin pushes him. He’s having fun.
“You’re fun and honest, a bit cheeky. Most of the time I don’t know if I want to get you into a headlock or if I want to laugh but I dig it.”
“Well, we’re on the same page.”
“Can we sleep now?” He asks, but he doesn’t sound annoyed at all, he even sounds amused. Jimin pushes his luck.
“That’s all?”
“What do you want me to tell you? That you’re charming and very bright? That I’m really honoured to do this job with you and wouldn’t want to be anywhere else? Yeah, I can tell you that.”
Jimin’s pleased.
“Well thank you. I wouldn’t have anyone else as my bodyguard.”
Yoongi hums.
“Goodnight now.”
“Yeah, goodnight.”
When he wakes up in the morning, he’s latched onto Yoongi’s side, a hand thrown over his stomach, a leg over his, bodies pressed flush. Yoongi’s arm is wrapped around his back, pressing him closer, and his free hand is on Jimin’s arm. Jimin slowly opens his eyes, trying to revel in the moment. His head is tucked in the crook of Yoongi’s arm. He can see Yoongi’s shirt has ridden up, exposing the soft skin of his stomach. Maybe Jimin can sleep a little longer. Yoongi’s arm twitch and Jimin tries to be as still as possible. The hand on his back moves, fingers tickling the skin of his waist, going down to the small of his back before going up again. Yoongi’s awake. He’s awake and he’s caressing him. Jimin feels good, protected. Yoongi goes on for a while, until Jimin finally falls back asleep again.
_____
The night out with his friends comes faster than anticipated. Jimin’s spent a few days in the studio working on the next album with Yoongi listening to his work. They’ve done another photoshoot, a couple paparazzis have followed them around the city, and they’ve been arguing for two days over which basketball manga is the best. This kind of week is becoming the new normal to him.
They meet at Hoseok’s place. They’re the last ones to arrive and they’re welcomed with cheers, his friends crowding Yoongi while distractedly greeting him. It makes him laugh, the way they’re excited to meet someone new. After they’ve all introduced themselves, Yoongi purses his lips.
“...I know who you are… I’m the only one here who isn’t a celebrity.” Jimin elbows him in the ribs. Yoongi coughs. “But thank you, it was nice of you.”
They ask him tons of questions, from who he has worked with to how many people he can fight at once. The answer is five, he tells them with a laid back attitude as they start howling around him. It makes Yoongi laugh and Jimin’s happy just sitting back and staring at him, gums showing, animatedly talking with his friends.
After a while, the questions circle back to him. His friends make them both talk about the pretending to be together thing. Jimin jokes about it and Yoongi follows. He adds that the next trial is going to be at the celebrities’ gala. His friends hum. They’re all going to be there but they’ll be too busy mingling with people and answering journalists’ questions that they’ll barely have time to properly interact. Yoongi’s looking like he’s been given a death sentence.
“Why are you making this face?” Jimin asks and Yoongi turns his head to look at him.
“We’re going to a gala.”
“Ah, I should’ve told you sooner.”
“Nothing could’ve prepared me for it.”
“It’s not as bad as it sounds.” Namjoon says. “And I hate those kinds of events.”
“You could participate in our contest with Jungkook.” Seokjin adds.
“We try and steal the most hors d’oeuvre possible.” Jungkook completes.
“I’ll pass, but thank you.” Yoongi laughs.
“I try to spot the men who aren’t dressed in a boring way.” Hoseok suggests.
“Do you find any?”
“No. But it passes the time.”
“Do any of you like these events?”
“I do.” Jungkook says. “I’m just hungry.”
“Honestly I’m just trying to hide from the women that are twice my age and who try to seduce me.” Taehyung’s shoulders are hunched. “I dread these things with my entire being.”
“You can stay by my side.” Yoongi suggests. “I’ll make them flee with my death stare.”
Taehyung barks out a laugh.
“Honey. My death stare is the best around. They just don’t care.”
They get along well. Jimin lets his head fall against Taehyung’s shoulder and he’s happy to follow the discussion, basking in the laughter and overall good mood. He gets distracted by Yoongi who’s immersed in a discussion with Namjoon and Taehyung about cinema. He can’t stop staring at his lips, keeps thinking about their kisses, and yearns. He wishes he hadn’t fucked up, that it’d lasted longer.
At some point, Yoongi excuses himself to the toilets. His friends all turn towards him.
“Fake my ass.” Seokjin tells him.
Jimin frowns.
“You stare at him like you want to eat him.” Taehyung states matter-of-factly and Jimin sputters.
“I do not.”
“You do.” Namjoon replies, smiling. “You’re starry-eyed.”
“Listen…” Jimin concedes.
Hoseok claps his hands.
“You like him!” He says excitedly, Jimin’s beginning of an answer is enough for him.
“Yeah but he can’t know.”
“Why’s that?” Jungkook asks, doe-eyed.
“It’s not mutual.”
Hoseok and Jungkook’s shoulders sag.
“I don’t believe you.” Taehyung replies and Jimin sighs.
“We kissed and he fled.”
“You kissed?” Seokjin asks, incredulous.
“So we wouldn’t be awkward if we had to kiss in front of the cameras.”
Namjoon hums.
“And he fled.” He reassesses.
Jimin nods.
Taehyung puts an arm around his shoulder and presses him close.
Yoongi walks back in the room and none of them know what to say. Luckily for them, Hoseok’s quick to react and he springs up, sliding an arm around his shoulders.
“What if I showed you dirt on Jimin?” He smiles and Yoongi smiles back.
Jimin whines but all of his friends are already taking their phones out.
The next twenty minutes are spent showing him the worst pictures they’ve ever taken of him.
_____
Jimin notices something odd amidst his Twitter mentions in the days preceding the gala. Capslock threats made by burner accounts, always the same thing : how Jimin should be ashamed of how disgusting he is and how the world would be a better place without him. It’s nothing he hasn’t seen before, especially in the last few weeks, but this time there’s a date at the end of the tweet : the gala night. Yoongi tries convincing him not to go but Jimin’s set on making his first public appearance after his coming out. It leads to a few arguments but Jimin doesn’t budge. He’s convinced it’s crucial for him to go with Yoongi, to normalize his orientation to the general public. It takes a while but Yoongi finally concedes, sighing.
When the night finally comes, Jimin can tell Yoongi’s nervous. He irons his shirt three times, asks him multiple times how he should act and Jimin tries reassuring him as best as he can. His make-up artist arrives an hour before they have to leave and Jimin lets himself observe Yoongi as he gets his make-up done. He’s handsome, and the make-up only highlights the pretty curves of his face, the eyeshadow underlines his feline eyes. Jimin wants to kiss him.
They’ve become used to each other. Their training has worked. Nowadays, they don’t spend more than half an hour without touching for no reason, a hand on the hip as they cross paths in the flat, a caress on the thigh as they laugh, Jimin cupping his face in his hands when Yoongi makes an absolutely absurd statement that has him howling with amusement, and always, at night, they fall asleep on their respective sides of the bed, and every single morning, without exception, Jimin wakes up to him being cradled by Yoongi.
So, yeah, he’s not worried about tonight. They’re going to ace it, there’s no way their act isn’t convincing enough. Maybe their relationship can be seen as a romantic one because Jimin clearly isn’t pretending, that must help.
When Yoongi’s make-up artist is done with him, Jimin tugs him close and takes a selfie of the two of them. Yoongi’s making a peace sign, smiling wide enough that his gums are showing, and Jimin absolutely adores the picture he took. He posts it on Twitter while Yoongi groans.
“You’re really kicking the nest aren’t you?” He asks, squishing Jimin’s cheeks in his hand.
“The make-up! Don’t ruin the make-up!” Jimin manages to say while having his cheeks squeezed. It makes Yoongi laugh. He lets go. “The more we appear together, the faster it will become normal to people.”
“You’re awfully optimistic.”
“I have to be.”
The ride to the gala is spent chatting, Jimin’s hand on Yoongi’s thigh, Yoongi’s own hand on top of his.
Jimin’s used to it. He smiles at the cameras when they get out of the car, holding Yoongi close to him. They answer a few questions, and Yoongi is very clever in his answers. He’s elusive, gives them enough information about them to satisfy them without revealing anything too personal. It seems like he was meant for this job. They conclude the interview with Jimin kissing Yoongi’s hand after he tells the journalists he’s lucky he has him in his life.
They spot Jimin’s friends, Jungkook and Seokjin unsurprisingly close to the buffet, Taehyung glued to Namjoon as a couple women talk to them and Hoseok making a group of men laugh with one of his stories. Soon enough, Yoongi and Jimin are roped into conversations, congratulations, small talk with so many people Yoongi looks a bit dizzy after a while. Yoongi refuses the champagne flutes he’s handed but keeps serving Jimin whenever a waiter walks by them.
“You’re very considerate.” Jimin tells him after they’ve been hogged once again by people.
“It’s not because I’m staying alert that you can’t have fun.” Yoongi replies, patting his cheek.
Jimin catches his hand in his.
“That’s very thoughtful.”
Yoongi smiles.
“Hi there.” A man says, putting a hand on his waist, and Jimin recognizes his voice even before he turns to look at him.
“Seojun.” He replies, giving him his sweetest smile.
Yoongi’s hand leaves Jimin’s cheek.
“How have you been?” Seojun asks and Jimin threads his fingers in his hair, beaming.
“Busy, but good, what about you?”
“In between jobs, it’s not every day that I can take a breather.”
“I know what you mean.”
“I wanted to congratulate you on coming out. I wish I had your courage.”
Jimin tilts his head to the side. Seojun’s always been charming. They’ve been flirting here and there for years but nothing ever happened.
“Maybe it’ll open a door for other people like us.”
Seojun nods.
“You’re terribly handsome tonight. Maybe we could have a drink one of these days, catch up.”
Yoongi’s hand finds Jimin’s waist, tucks him closer.
“I’m afraid he’s a bit busy lately.” Yoongi replies in his stead, and Jimin can see the vitriol in his stare, the passive-aggressive smile he’s sporting.
“Oh. I think we haven’t been introduced.” Seojun replies sweetly. “You’re the boyfriend.”
“And you are?” Yoongi doesn’t even try to be polite, it’s amusing, Jimin pinches his lips, trying not to smile.
“Seojun, an old friend. Anyway, Jimin, call me if you want to do something.”
Seojun excuses himself and disappears in the crowd.
Jimin laughs, turning towards Yoongi.
“What was that?” He asks.
“Just acting like your boyfriend.” And he looks like he’s pouting, vexed. Jimin’s absolutely endeared.
“Right.” Jimin grins.
“Right.” Yoongi clears his throat, looking away. “I’m going to excuse myself, find the restrooms.” He tells him. “Try not getting seduced and kidnapped by a handsome man while I’m away.”
“Understood, darling.”
“Shut up.”
“Make me.” He replies, as always, liking to push Yoongi’s buttons.
Yoongi takes a step towards him, and they’re within kissing distance. He pinches his cheek.
“Cheeky man.” He says and walks away.
Jimin looks around him, maybe he could take a break from the noise and the people. His phone rings, it’s his mother. It’s the perfect opportunity for him to get some time away from the crowd. He slaloms between everyone, slides between gates and finds himself in a back alley. He answers.
“Hi mom.” He says.
“Hi baby!” She coos.
“How have you been?”
“Good, good. Your father is trying to convince me to buy outdoor slippers.”
Jimin laughs.
“Isn’t it just shoes?”
“It’s more comfortable.”
“What would you use it for?”
“Throw out the trash I guess, but that’s it. I know I’m going to cave in because I love him but it seems a little pointless.”
“Glad to know everything’s going well at home.”
“How about you? When are you bringing your boyfriend home?”
“Actually—” Jimin starts before seeing a man walking up to him. He keeps advancing towards him. He has his hood on and Jimin can’t see his face. “Mom, I’ll have to call you back. Love you.” He hangs up and tries getting back to the gala, calling Yoongi’s number.
The man blocks his way.
“Excuse me.” Jimin tells him; he’s starting to get nervous. He faintly hears Yoongi’s voice coming out of his phone. “What are you doing in the back alley?” He says and prays for Yoongi to hear him well enough to find him.
“You’re disgusting.” The man is getting closer. “I always knew something was wrong with you.”
Jimin carefully takes a step back. Then another. He keeps walking back. “You think you can try to say you’re normal but we all know it’s not the case.” He has a knife. Jimin is petrified. He’s stuck against the building’s wall. He wants to try and fight him but he’s tetanized. The sound of his own heart beating in his ears is deafening.
From the corner of his eye he sees Yoongi running towards him. The man tries to stab him but Jimin pushes him, manages getting away for a second before the man grabs him by the throat and pushes him back against the wall.
“Hey asshole!” Yoongi screams behind him, and he throws his knee at the man’s wrist. The knife falls to the ground. He grabs the back of his head and shoves it into the wall, next to Jimin. The man groans in pain. Jimin thinks Yoongi just broke his nose. He grabs his arm and twists it against his back, he doesn’t stop twisting until the man’s whining, knees buckling and falling to Jimin’s feet.
“Go and retrieve security. Now.” Yoongi tells him and Jimin nods, running away.
It all happens in a blur. A few minutes later, the man’s being taken away by the police for interrogation and the entire gala assembly has their eyes on them. Jimin doesn’t care. He’s eternally grateful for Yoongi who takes him in his arms as soon as the police forces have taken the man into custody. He keeps running his hand up and down his back, another in his hair, pressing him closer.
“It’s okay baby.” He tells him. “You’re safe now. I shouldn’t have left you. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m so glad you’re okay. So glad you’re safe.”
Jimin’s eyes prickle with tears.
“I shouldn’t have left the gala.” He says, choked up.
“It’s not your fault.” Yoongi tells him, taking a step back and cradling his cheeks between his hands. “It’s not.” His thumbs caress his cheekbones. “Oh darling.” He says and takes him back between his arms. Jimin holds him close, like he’s afraid he’s going to disappear.
“Can we go home?” He asks instead.
“Yes we can, I’m sure they’ll understand.”
Jimin nods. He’s still shaking.
His friends find him before they leave. They hug him, trying to comfort him, but they look shaken, worried for their friend.
They manage to slip away from the party and Jimin takes Yoongi’s hand during the ride home.
When they get home, they clean off their make-up, Jimin takes a long shower and Yoongi a short one, not wanting to leave Jimin’s side. When they get to bed, Jimin puts on a movie and lies next to Yoongi, putting his head on his torso, an arm around his stomach. Yoongi puts an arm around his waist and tucks him close. They don’t talk and Jimin finally falls asleep, a little less terrified, with Yoongi watching over him.
_____
Jimin doesn’t leave his apartment for a few days. He’s shaken. He talks about it with Yoongi, how he didn’t think he could’ve truly been in danger. Yoongi replaces a hair strand behind his ear, tells him that’s why he’s here.
The news makes it to the tabloids. His mother calls him again and he spends half an hour reassuring her, promising her he’ll be careful from now on. His friends come to visit him, bring him his favorite food, distract him until everything starts to feel a little more normal again. And Yoongi, well, Jimin didn’t think he could fall more for him, and yet, it’s what happens. Yoongi is there for him, he seems to always sense when he wants or doesn’t want to talk, he knows what to suggest to help him, overall, he’s there for him and Jimin’s grateful.
He starts feeling better after a few days, decides to go to the studio and work on the album. It starts small, him going to work, then Yoongi dragging him to the gym, then they go to the park together. Yoongi’s hand doesn’t leave his back for the entire time they spend outside.
It all feels normal again a couple weeks later.
Jimin realizes he’s feeling better when he gets out of the house without checking both ways to see if there’s someone waiting for him.
_____
“You need new clothes.” Jimin tells Yoongi one morning.
Yoongi looks up from his phone, unimpressed.
“Why?”
“You’ve been rotating the five same outfits since you’ve arrived.”
“And?”
“I’m not letting you live like this.”
Yoongi scoffs.
“ ‘Live like this’ , sounds like I’m living like an animal.”
“I won’t comment on this, you wouldn’t like it.”
He rolls his eyes, amused.
“Come on, it’ll be my treat.”
“I’m getting paid you know.”
“Take it as a gift.”
“Are you telling me you want to be my sugar daddy?”
Jimin laughs and Yoongi’s smile is cheeky. He likes this look on him.
“I have the means to be one. Come on, it’ll be fun.”
“Oh we have very different visions of what fun is, but I have the feeling that you won’t let me say no.”
JImin gives him a saccharine smile.
“Your hunch is correct.”
Half an hour later, they’re outside, and Jimin’s taking clothes off racks, showing them to Yoongi who picks the ones he doesn’t hate . Jimin picks up a few items, ignoring Yoongi’s protests, and when his arms are full, he guides him to the fitting room. It takes a couple outfits but soon enough, Yoongi’s getting into it.
“I’m hot in this.” He says, coming out from behind the dressing room’s curtains.
“I need you to kiss me right now.” Jimin answers and Yoongi laughs. Jimin’s absolutely not lying, he’s been thinking about kissing him again for the past few days and it won’t leave his thoughts even if he tries to distract himself. Yoongi is fundamentally kissable. He wants to cover his entire body with kisses and maybe climb him if he has to be honest with himself. Waking up between his arms makes him want to kiss him lazily until they can’t resist the caffeine’s call, seeing him read on his living room’s couch makes his skin crawl with the desire to come behind him and kiss the top of his head, and the trickiest moment of the day is when he comes out of the shower, still flushed, and he wants to undress him, map his body with his hands until Yoongi’s whining and asking for more. You could say he’s not doing so great at pretending this whole relationship.
“Jimin?” Yoongi drags him away from his thoughts and he looks positively gorgeous.
“You look incredible.”
It lasts for a while but they end up finding enough new outfits to satisfy Jimin.
When they walk out, he kisses Yoongi on the cheek.
“See? Was it terrible?”
He shruggs.
“You made it bearable.”
Jimin sees a man with a camera maybe ten meters away from them. He doesn’t know if it’s just a stranger or if it’s a paparazzi.
“Well thank you. What do you want to do now?”
He expects Yoongi to want to go home.
“I don’t know? Maybe a milkshake? I know a place.”
Jimin’s surprised in the best way.
“Well, I’m following you.”
It feels like a date. They’re talking about their childhoods on the way to the milkshake place, only stopping to place their orders. The conversation switches to their weeks together as they sit, excitedly talking about their daily lives, the way Yoongi starts to feel at home at Jimin’s place. Jimin’s feeling good, legs intertwined with Yoongi’s. Jimin makes him taste his milkshake and Yoongi returns the favor. It feels natural.
He notices from the corner of his eye the same man he’s seen with a camera sitting to the table next to them.
So when Yoongi starts saying You know, you make me feel good, even if this whole thing is— and Jimin knows he’s about to say fake, and that the man is going to hear it, and everything will be over, so he does the only thing he can think of. He leans forward and kisses Yoongi. He kisses him deep and Yoongi’s hands come around Jimin’s cheeks and he kisses back. It feels exhilarating for a second and Jimin forgets they’re in public, lets the fact that this has been fake from the very beginning slip away from his mind, and he lets himself enjoy the kiss, tongue caressing Yoongi’s bottom lip. Soon enough, it becomes an open-mouthed kiss, a bit too enthusiastic for a restaurant but Jimin doesn’t care. His heart hammers in his chest. And when Yoongi pulls away for a second, wild-eyed, Jimin whispers in his ear the man next to us, he’s a paparazzi, don’t say anything about this relationship . He feels Yoongi tensing up. He kisses him again but Yoongi’s kiss is slower than before, less hearted.
Jimin pulls back. It’s barely noticeable but Yoongi’s jaw is clenched.
He looks around him and sees the man quickly looking away.
“Leave us alone.” Yoongi tells him, and his voice is cold, glacial.
The man tries to argue but something in Yoongi’s stare changes his mind and he scrambles to retrieve his coat and leave.
“We should get back home.” Yoongi says, sullenly.
“We shouldn't let this ruin our day.” Jimin tries to argue.
“I’m not in the mood anymore.”
Jimin’s heart drops in his chest.
They finish their milkshakes quickly and leave.
Yoongi doesn’t talk on the way home. He puts his clothes away as soon as they’re back and spends the evening reading, only stopping to cook them dinner.
“You’re okay?” Jimin asks him while they’re eating.
“I’m fine.” Yoongi replies, pointedly looking at their meal.
“You know, it happens to be followed by paparazzis.”
“I’m okay.”
Jimin sighs.
“Okay.”
They still watch a movie together afterwards but Yoongi doesn’t make a move to invite him in his embrace like he usually does. Jimin’s starting to feel bad.
The feeling worsens when they get to bed. Yoongi’s been cradling him to sleep since the aggression, and for the first night since he’s started sleeping in his bed, he rolls on his side and Jimin’s faced with his back. It makes him nauseous.
Jimin has to work the next days after, it takes his mind off of things but he still notices how distant Yoongi has become, and he doesn't know what's happening. He doesn’t understand if he’s done something wrong.
He tries getting used to it, the way Yoongi won’t look at him anymore, how they don’t bicker over every simple thing and where Jimin tries to flirt his way into getting what he wants, Yoongi caving in while menacing he’s going to do something , Jimin awaiting for him to just act on it. He feels like their playful banter is something he’s going to have to say goodbye to, that Yoongi’s playful touches, gentle caresses, warm hugs are over. Maybe it’s how it should be. Maybe it’s meant to be purely professional and Yoongi’s right. Jimin fooled himself into thinking this could become something real , but Yoongi has already made it clear it wasn’t. He’s already been rejected once, now twice, he won’t need a third time.
So that’s how it goes now. Yoongi follows him everywhere but he’ll be on his phone while Jimin works with Sejin, mulls over his next album’s tracks. He’ll still prepare breakfast while Jimin brews them coffee but he won’t sit at the counter anymore, he just retrieves his coffee and goes to the couch to read.
They appear at events together, Yoongi puts his arm around Jimin’s waist but the touch’s barely there. They answer the journalist’s questions, their answers are hollow, they miss the amusement they had about pretending at first. Hopefully the press doesn’t catch it. Jimin wouldn’t be able to deal with rumors right now.
A week passes, another. It turns into a third and Jimin’s feeling miserable. Even if he’s tried to distantiate himself from the situation, his feelings don’t magically disappear, and it hurts every time he looks at Yoongi.
It becomes too much after an evening out. They went to a movie premiere and Yoongi spoke to him twice in the span of four hours, always in front of cameras. Jimin’s sick of it. They walk back to his flat and as Yoongi’s taking off his bow-tie, Jimin explodes.
“Is there a problem between us?” He asks, hands in fists, voice wavering.
Yoongi lets his bow-tie hang around his neck.
“No.”
Jimin takes a sharp intake of breath.
“Okay. Let me reformulate.” He says, and his voice’s colored with anger, volume rising. “ What is your problem with me?”
Yoongi’s unbuttoning his shirt, uncovering his undershirt.
“Why would I have a problem with you?” And his voice is careful, controlled.
“Don’t bullshit me.” Jimin takes a step closer to him, chin high, nostrils flaring. “You won’t talk to me, you won’t even look at me .”
Yoongi looks up and their gazes lock. Jimin sees his jaw clenching.
“What have I done to you? We may not be for real but I thought we could at least be friends!” He takes another step, walks into Yoongi’s personal space.
“Do you really want to know?” He asks, and there’s an edge to his voice, something ugly that makes Jimin’s stomach’s churn. “Do you want me to tell you why we’re not as close as you’d want us to be, why we’re not buddies ?”
“Enlighten me, instead of giving me a cold shoulder, acting like I don’t exist, or worse, not even worthy to be looked at.” Jimin knows he’s talking too loud, that he’s too angry, but he’s tired of pretending.
“We’re not friends because I have actual feelings for you! It’s all fun and games to you but it’s not for me. You can’t just flirt with me and expect me to be okay with it!” He’s not screaming but he looks distraught.
“Stop lying to me.” Jimin’s voice is low, trembling.
“Do I look like I’m lying to you?” Yoongi replies and he’s tense, he takes a step forward and they’re nose to nose. “Have I ever looked like I was lying to you? Did you kiss me and felt like it was a joke to me?” He grabs his collar, tugs him closer. They’re so close. “Did you grind on me and thought I didn’t care?”
“You ran away.” Jimin answers and he could kiss him from this distance. He has trouble breathing.
“I didn’t want to get hard with you straddling me.”
Jimin breathes in shakily.
“Kiss me.” He says, voice barely above a whisper, and Yoongi, hand fisted in his shirt, tugs him even closer as he leans forward and kisses him. It’s messy and filled with pent-up emotions, they’re barely breathing, kissing hard, and Yoongi takes another step forward, makes Jimin walk back, another one, and again, again, until Jimin’s back hits the wall and Yoongi’s hungrily kissing him, not leaving a second to breathe. Jimin’s hands finish unbuttoning his shirt, fingers crawling under his undershirt, hands splayed around his ribcage, sliding behind his back, nails digging, pressing closer. Yoongi grabs his thigh, brings his leg up around his hips and holds him there. Jimin’s feeling euphoric, feels like kissing him for the first time, free from any form of pretense. He grinds against him and Yoongi sighs against his lips before kissing him again, with fervor, with desire and want and so many things they kept hidden for weeks. Jimin’s whining and he’s seconds away from stripping Yoongi away from his fucking suit when Yoongi pulls back.
“We should talk.” He says, panting, and Jimin snorts.
“Can’t we talk after?”
“How long have you been feeling this way?” Yoongi asks him, and his eyes are still dark, but there’s a hint of vulnerability in them.
“You mean, riding the daylights out of you? A while.”
Yoongi laughs, letting his head fall.
“I was talking about feelings.”
“Promise I’ll get to do a lot of unspeakable things to you after we’ve talked?” Jimin asks, letting his leg fall down.
Yoongi’s hand caresses his cheek.
“Promise. I’ll return the favor.”
Jimin kisses him, light. He can still feel the tension between them, but he’s right. They should talk.
He walks away, up to the couch, and lets himself fall on it.
“I don’t know. I was attracted from the very beginning but it somewhat became serious over the weeks.”
Yoongi sits next to him.
“What about the first kiss?”
“I was already interested. You?”
“I was done for the moment you told me my fighting was sexy.”
“You like them cheeky.”
Yoongi smiles.
“I do. And you’re a real pain in the ass.”
“ That’s what you like about me?”
“Among many other things, yes. And to reply to your question, the kiss was very tricky for me because I was nervous and into it, and it kind of escalated very quickly for me.”
“I thought you hated me after I kinda let myself get into it.”
Yoongi laughs and Jimin crawls up to him, puts his head on his lap, and Yoongi’s fingers are immediately in his hair.
“What happened at the milkshake place?” Jimin asks, caressing Yoongi’s torso.
“I thought you had understood I was trying to confess and wanted to kiss me for real. The whiplash was too much for me.”
“Oh no…” Jimin whispers, and suddenly, he understands his behavior. “You tried shielding yourself.”
“Yeah. Tried to keep it strictly professional to make it hurt less.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
Yoongi caresses his cheek, thumb pressing against his lips. Jimin sucks it in. It makes Yoongi lick his lips, smiling.
“Should we get under the shower?” He suggests.
“Together?”
He nods, unbuttoning Jimin’s shirt.
“Only if I get to rile you up afterwards.”
Yoongi laughs as Jimin sits up. He brings him close to kiss him.
“I was thinking of getting started under the shower.” He says, grinning and they kiss again.
It takes them another fifteen minutes to reach the bathroom.
_____
It takes time but Yoongi eventually moves in with him. He has too many books. Jimin buys shelves for them. Their morning routine doesn’t change, not even after five months, a year, two. They still go to events together, but Yoongi’s not his bodyguard anymore, he simply is his boyfriend. The general public has warmed up to them. Yoongi still asks paparazzis to leave when he spots them, but most of the time he simply flips them off before kissing him.
_____
“Where did you put my tie?” Yoongi calls from the bedroom and Jimin walks out of the bathroom, shirtless.
“Which one?” He asks, walking behind him and wrapping his arms around his stomach.
“The silk one.” He replies, craning his neck to kiss him.
Jimin gives him a sheepish smile.
“I think it’s in my stuff.”
Yoongi clicks his tongue, amused, and turns around, pressing his forehead against his.
“Thief.”
“I should’ve stolen your shirt so I could admire you a little longer.”
Yoongi laughs.
“We’re going to be late.”
“They won’t start without us.” Jimin replies, hands going down Yoongi’s back, stopping above his ass.
“We’re not going to be late to MAMA. It’s non negotiable.” He replies, grinning, trying to swat Jimin’s hands away.
Jimin bats his eyelashes at him, pouting.
“You won’t distract me.” Yoongi looks away, biting his lips, retrieving his tie.
The other sighs, taking Yoongi’s tie between his hands and knotting it.
“You look handsome.” He tells him, hands splayed on his chest.
“And you look shirtless. We have to leave.”
Jimin groans.
“You’re a pain in the ass.” He answers, getting his undershirt and shirt, putting them on.
“You’re one to talk.” Yoongi scoffs, putting his jacket on.
“And yet you love me.”
“I do. I do.”
“I love you too.”
_____
Jimin’s done with promoting his new album, comeback season is behind him and he can finally rest for a while before going on tour. Yoongi surprises him with a trip to Hawaii. It’s exactly what he needs.
He’s prepared them an itinerary with a week spent visiting and another resting. It’s their first vacation together overseas. Yoongi tells him it’s a gift to celebrate their fourth year anniversary and Jimin fumbles. He’s gotten him a signed first print of his favorite author, it seems like a bleak gift compared to his. Yoongi kisses his insecurities away, reassures him by telling him it was the best gift he could’ve offered him.
The trip is wonderful. Yoongi takes him on a helicopter to see an active volcano, they hike to observe a dormant crater, walk through incredible forests that leave Jimin speechless. The islands they go to are magnificent and Jimin doesn’t tire of it, admires the sights and explores everything until he’s exhausted and falls asleep as soon as they come back to their hotel rooms. Once the first week is over, Jimin feels like sleeping for two days straight and Yoongi brings him to a spa center, offers him two full days of massages and various cares that relax Jimin to the bone, all of the tiredness he’s accumulated for the past months slowly melts away.
On the fourth night, Yoongi brings him to the beach as the sun sets. He’s bought them dinner and they stand, holding hands, watching the waves crash on the shore as the sky turns gold and crimson. Jimin wants to sit and start eating, but Yoongi stops him in his tracks.
“There’s something I’d like to say.” He tells him, and Jimin frowns, smiling. Yoongi takes his other hand in his.
“I didn’t use to consider myself as a lucky person. I went through life and fought to get what I wanted. I went through many hardships, had to exhaust myself to get to where I wanted to be. And then, I met you. Four years ago, life got in my way and I was assigned with protecting the most infuriating and yet incredible man I’ve ever met.” He’s smiling and Jimin feels soft, fond, completely and utterly in love with Yoongi. “I may not send you long video messages as soon as we spend more than an hour away, hassle you with hugs and kisses as soon as you get home, but I hope I show you how much you mean to me. You’re always in my thoughts, a beacon of hope and warmth in my heart, and I cherish you so much. You mean the world to me. We’ve known each other for four years now and I’ve been thinking a lot about what you mean to me, how your existence brings me happiness and comfort, and how lucky I am to share my life with you.” He lets go of Jimin’s hands. “Now, this thinking brought me to a conclusion.” One of his hands disappears into his back pocket. Their gazes are locked and Jimin feels emotional, he wants to cry, this whole trip has been overwhelming with how perfect it is and now Yoongi’s being sweet to him, and—he gets on one knee. “Four years with you is not enough. I want to wake up by your side every morning, sleepily go through the motions of mornings with you, fight for you to not steal my entire wardrobe when I’m looking away, spend lazy evenings cuddled against you and be with you until we grow old and grumpy.” He opens the small box in his hands, revealing a carefully crafted golden ring. Jimin starts crying. “I want to spend my life with you.” Yoongi tells him, voice breaking a little. “Will you marry me?”
Jimin’s tears are rolling down his face as he nods, smiling so much his cheeks hurt and Yoongi slips the ring on his finger before Jimin urges to get him back up, shaking, not waiting for Yoongi to be fully standing up again before he takes his face between his hands and kisses him silly. Yoongi laughs against his lips and hugs him tight, pressing closer, until the both of them are laughing, foreheads pressed against one another.
“I’m so glad we found each other.” Jimin manages saying after a while. “I love you.”
Yoongi brushes a few hair strands away from Jimin’s forehead with a warm gaze and gentle fingers.
“I love you too.” He says before kissing him again.