Chapter Text
Tommy was tired…And not the normal type of tiredness he felt, the type he would feel after a fun day with his friends, or after a good sparring match. No, this type of tiredness he felt was overwhelming, more than anything he had ever experienced before.
Each and every day, from the second he opened his eyes in the morning, to when he closed them again, at night, Tommy had to force himself to continue. To trudge on. But he couldn’t do this anymore. The tiredness was all consuming, to the point he started to feel cold and numb…Unable to smile or laugh with glee. After all, what was there to be happy about in Logstedshire…His prison. It may have had a fun name, a name created when he and his ghostly brother tried to make fun of the situation, on his first day of exile, but Tommy knew the truth…
In the back of his mind, Tommy always knew Logstedshire would be his forever prison. A place for him to wallow and go crazy while people arrived and laughed at him, as if he were an animal at a zoo. Yes, that is exactly what he is…He IS an animal at a zoo, who’s only purpose is to bring people amusement, while he has to sacrifice his freedom and fun.
Whenever Tommy thought of his current situation, of being exiled and trapped, tears always pricked at the corners of his eyes. His chest would tighten and be filled with a dull pain. A pain that never truly faded, afterwards…Whenever Ghostbur wasn’t looking, he would punch the log walls until his knuckles bled. Anger bubbling and boiling within him, threatening to overflow and urge him to destroy. However, he always told himself he couldn’t be like his eldest brother. The very same brother who often let his anger control him. The very brother…Who Tommy grew to despise.
Tommy wanted to be like Ghostbur, his other brother…He wanted to forget all the sadness in his past, to be able to see the light in every little thing around him. Ghostbur always seemed happy…Content to just float around and comment on hopeful little things that somehow managed to make Tommy crack a smile…But…Ghostbur wasn’t around anymore…Ghostbur didn’t even want him, now.
Ever since the disaster, that was the beach party, Tommy couldn’t trust Ghostbur…He was supposed to give out all of the invites! He was supposed to be successful! But where did half of the letters go?...Over the communication device, Fundy and Philza had told him that they didn’t even get an invite, else they would definitely have arrived! Dream told him one thing, his former friends and family told him another…He didn’t know what to believe. After all…Ghostbur himself would have arrived, right? Even if all the invites somehow failed!…Right?
Tommy just didn’t know anymore…And it just hurt…
He could feel himself starting to lose it…After all, he was talking to logs and shit…He was pretending to be happy, pretending to have a phone where he would send Snapchat streaks and talk to hot girls…He was just…Pretending.
However, Tommy was done with pretending. He was done with everything.
Seeing Drista was truly the final straw. Yes, it was nice to FINALLY be allowed to return home and see how everything had changed. To be able to walk down the Prime Path for, what he knew now, would be his final time. Even though Dream had said that he might be able to return for Christmas, Tommy knew he couldn’t last that long. Those mere days would be absolute hell for him…After all, he was hallucinating things, he was seeing his best friend all around him…In his dreams, in Logstedshire and now, he was seeing him when he was walking around L’Manberg, for the final time.
Tubbo was definitely a hallucination…He exiled him…Why would he want to see him? Was it just to laugh at him, like all the others?...He bet it was. Tubbo didn’t care…Ghostbur didn’t care…No-one cared, really…Even when Quackity visited, when he returned to Logstedshire and Drista left, all Quackity did was create him a gallery of pain…Showing him pictures of his past, of people he once loved and laughed with…People he once trusted. So, when the day was over, Tommy knew what he had to do, when the morrow come.
At the crack of dawn, when the birds finally began to chirp, Tommy dragged himself out of bed. His body was heavy…Cold…But he wouldn’t give up now. No, Tommy was determined. With heavy feet, he managed to step into the Nether portal, after collecting his discs, from his ender chest. The purple mass, of the portal, swirled around his mind before his vision cleared, letting him take a good view of his surroundings. Y’know, some would say that the Nether was like Hell, with its grim and dark colour palette and the bubbling lava beneath. But Tommy thought of the Nether as an escape…A comfort. It was warm and cosy, as if the realm were giving him a warm hug whenever he stepped into its walls.
Shakily, Tommy approached the edge of the floating platform and looked straight down. The lava below looked…Nice. It was pretty, dare he say…Each time he looked into its depths, Tommy remembered all of the times he had dived in, with a fire resistance potion, in his past. He remembered how warm it was as he swam through…Maybe…It’d be just like that without the potion. Maybe…It’d give him a warm hug if he took a single step forward…Would it greet him with open arms? Let him bask within it’s warmth before he slipped away?...Tommy believed it would…After all, the lava was always there for him, unlike his ‘friends’…
With a gulp, Tommy looked at the discs he hugged to his chest…The most precious things he had. The very things that reminded him of a happier time…He loved these discs…He loved the stories they all would tell, such as the story with the female astronaut he so desperately wanted to meet…And, in the back of his mind, Tommy knew he loved being able to sit back, on the bench, in L’Manberg...With Tubbo at his side…Simply listening to the discs as they softly played in the background…
A time he would never get back…
A time that would forever haunt him…
A time that would leave his mind if he simply took one…More…Step...
“What are you doing?”
Tommy froze in place, eyes wide and filled with shock. He knew that voice. He knew what it meant…With a small turn, Tommy came face to face with the very owner of said voice and his heart sunk. A mix of emotions twisted around in his mind. Shock, for the person spooking him. Anger, for the person stopping him…Happiness…For the person even visiting him…
“T-Techno?” Tommy mumbled, looking up at the pig-like face of his eldest brother. His brows were furrowed, a deep frown upon his face, the very same expression he would give Tommy, as a kid. Whenever Tommy was doing something stupid, that would be followed by disaster and the loud bellows of child Tommy, when he certainly always got hurt by his very stupid actions. The expression made Tommy feel a little warm…It reminded him of his childhood. When there was no wars and no hatred…Just him, his older brothers, and his adoring father, Philza…
But, the warmth soon faded…Anger finally became the strongest emotion, in Tommy’s mind. He bared his teeth at his brother, starting to scream.
“I hate you!! Leave me alone!! If you’re just here to mock me, then do it! Do it and maybe I’ll finally be able to jump! Do it, Techno! You hate me, don’t’cha?!”
His younger brothers’ words made Techno sigh. It wasn’t an angry, nor an annoyed sigh, like what Tommy was so used to hearing…It was a sad and regretful sigh. Techno knew he had pushed many boundaries when he and Tommy were younger, but, at the time, he never knew what lasting impact it would make. Tommy was often good at hiding his sadness, at making others believe that he was a “Big Man”, and nothing at all would affect him. But now that Tommy was vulnerable and visibly scared, Techno finally understood what that lasting impact was.
Tommy spat out his words, signifying he had genuinely begun to hate his eldest brother. But the part that stuck to Techno the most was knowing that Tommy thought that HE hated HIM…That Techno despised his youngest brother. How could he tell Tommy…That isn’t true?
“No, Tommy. Step away from the edge. Let’s have a proper conversation.”
“No!! Don’t tell me what to do! You’re just going to taunt me for being weak, for not being strong like you! Go away!!”
Once again…A standstill. Tommy’s eyes were brimming with tears, his body beginning to shake as he kept inside sobs that threatened to escape. Tears that would prove his weakness to his dastardly brother. Tommy simply glared harder at Techno, trying his very best to make him leave, however…That didn’t happen. Techno was stubborn…But so was Tommy. Tommy KNEW what he had to do. And he wouldn’t stop until he did it.
“Techno! Listen to me! I-If you don’t leave me alone I’ll…I’ll hurt you! I’ll beat you into the dirt, just like you wanted to do to me!” A snarl left Tommy as he spoke, but his walls were already cracking down. His chest had begun to hurt again, he felt heavy and full of pain…Why would his anger not make it go away?...
“Tommy, stop being stupid and step away from the edge. I want to help you.”
“Help me?!” Tommy couldn’t help but laugh. He laughed and laughed at his brother’s preposterous words before his laughter was drowned out by his sobs. Tommy couldn’t help but break down, warm tears streaming down from his, once a beautiful blue, eyes. He brought an arm to his face and tried rubbing them away, but his tattered sleeve didn’t do much to stop the tears that continued to stream down his face. Under his other arm, Tommy hugged his discs closer, unwilling to let them go.
Techno watched as his brother sobbed. Just like when they were children, he didn’t know what to do, when others cried…Especially Tommy…That job was often left for Wilbur, or their father…Definitely not Techno, who tended to get annoyed when the person crying wouldn’t stop…Only making them worse, in the process. Techno liked to believe he wasn’t like his childhood self, but he knew that some tendencies would never leave him. However, it wouldn’t hurt to try and comfort his brother, especially in a time like this.
So, Techno approached while Tommy sobbed, seemingly sobbing harder and harder, until he almost couldn’t breathe. His small, frail body shook with each breath he tried to take. Techno finally had a proper chance to look at his younger brother…To see how small he had begun to look, after he was exiled to this life of pain and suffering. The tattered clothes he wore seemed to hang off of his gangly frame. He was small, weak and dirty…A stark difference to the Tommy Techno once knew. The Tommy he grew up with…
However, unbeknownst to Tommy, nor Techno, the ground below was beginning to crumble…The weight of Tommy kneeling down and occasionally pounding his fist against the stone had caused it to weaken…And, just as Techno reached out to console his brother, it had given way.
Everything seemed to move in slow motion. The ground below Tommy had fell through and now…Tommy was falling with it.
“Tommy!!” Techno screamed, instantly reaching down to grab Tommy’s hand. His sweaty, shuddering hand. Despite what he was going to do before, the very reason he stepped into the Nether, his eyes were filled with fear as he looked up at Techno. Fear and desperation…The desire to survive…Tommy quickly glanced down, watching as his once precious discs fell into the deadly lava below. When he saw how quickly they had combusted into flame, before sinking into the viscous liquid, Tommy panicked, more tears falling out of his eyes as he desperately started to beg for his brother to pull him up. When Techno swiftly did, Tommy scampered away from the edge, wheeping as he mumbled.
“I-I’m sorry! I don’t want to die! I don’t want to die! Please, no! I don’t want to burn alive!”
Carefully, Techno kneeled and pulled his brother into a big hug. Tommy froze, being snapped out of his daze, before he timidly hugged back. As he closed his eyes, he started to believe that this hug was better and warmer than any hug the lava would give him. His piglin brother, the very brother who Tommy thought hated him, who would never comfort him as a child, was managing to give him more comfort than anything he had felt in weeks…It was…Nice…And made Tommy start to hug him tighter, never wanting to let go.
As Techno patted and rubbed Tommy’s back, he began to whisper.
“Tommy, I’m here to save you from this hell…I’m here to protect you from Dream.”
Techno’s words made Tommy quiet down. Slowly, he glanced up at Techno and tilted his head. Save him? Protect him from Dream? How?...Wasn’t Dream his…Only friend? Why did he need protecting from him? The questions bounced around his mind, but the only thing he could manage to leave his mouth was a tiny: “Huh?...”
“You heard me, big man. You’re coming with me. You’ll be safe, that way.”
“I-I’ll be safe?...Where are you taking me?...”
Techno chuckled a tad, ruffling Tommy’s hair as if they were children again.
“I’m taking you to the Antarctic Empire.”