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𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭 𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐚 (𝐱.𝐝𝐣)

Summary:

- a gift of kindness; Visiting your orphanage, you stumble upon the person behind your inspiration as you grow up.

Work Text:

“Thank you, y/n, for always doing this. You don’t know how much this means to the children especially during this time of the year. All that you have given will be of very much help to them,” the head of the orphanage expresses her gratitude towards you. Today is one of the days you always look forward to every year, the Anthurium Christmas Event, an event you organize yearly for the children of the orphanage where you give out toys and food and have a small program for them.

“May I ask, what inspired you to do this annually, y/n? Not to be rude or something, but the dedication here is very respectful. You really do have a big and kind heart, just like an anthurium,” the other caretaker curiously asks you in which you gladly answer.

“You see, I used to be an orphan in this institute as well when I was younger. This place has been my home ever since I was born,” you tell her as you start narrating the story of how it all began.

It has been 10 years ago since you left the orphanage. You came into the institution when you were still an infant. Mrs. Park, the head caretaker, told you that your biological mother went there and left you since she cannot support you financially. They asked her about your biological father, but she did not say a word about him. Your mom took care of you in the first few weeks that you were born but being a jobless, single parent was difficult. She had no other relatives that could take care of you while she tries to find and make money. She attempted to bring you to her work, but children are prohibited. She was left with no choice but to leave you in an orphanage. Since then, there was no news about your biological mother, and did not ever come back to check on you. Despite having a sad history with your biological mother, the orphanage made sure that you will grow to be a great child just like everybody else. Mrs. Park and the rest of the caretakers looked after you and the other orphans very well, as if they were their own children. Then one time you met the new orphan boy who seems to be alone and sad.

“Hi, what’s your name? I am y/n! I’m five years old,” you greet the shy boy who is sitting alone by the swing. He looks at your extended hand before looking at your face. Small tears are visible in his eyes, he sniffs and wipes his runny nose with his arm before shaking your hand.

“I’m Xiaojun, five years old too,” he says.

“X-Xia-Xiao... What?” you confusingly ask, scratching your head.

“Xi-ao-jun. Xiaojun!” he repeats but you still could not get it. “DJ, just call me DJ,” he laughs at how funny you sound, finding it difficult to pronounce his name. You laugh after hearing him laugh, and you sit on the swing next to him.

“See, you look better when you smile,” you comment with a big grin on your face. “But why were you crying? Are you new here?” you ask. Xiaojun could not answer right away, feeling embarrassed about the idea of his parents dropping him off at the orphanage without an explanation. Even when Mrs. Park told him that his parents will just go somewhere for a while, he knows they will never come back. His parents have been quarreling most of the time since Xiaojun was born, his father blaming his mother for bearing a child unintentionally. Xiaojun is just 5 years old but he acts way older than his age, the situation he has with his parents made him mature early. Xiaojun did not tell you the reason but instead tells you that he is just lonely because he does not have a friend yet.

“I can be your friend, you can count on that,” you say, Xiaojun looks back and smiles at you. Since then, you and Xiaojun have been great friends. Mrs. Park and the other caretakers have seen Xiaojun’s improvement as a kid throughout the years. They all knew how much you have influenced Xiaojun as you both grow up in the orphanage. The boy who used to be so quiet and shy is now playful and friendly just like you. The caretakers are happy to have you around since you infect the other children with your positivity and happiness. But then, Xiaojun got adopted and left the orphanage, leaving you and the rest of his friends. You feel sad for a while, missing the times you have shared with your best friend. But then, you are happier since Xiaojun is already being taken care of by great parents. You know every kid in the orphanage deserves parents who will love and cherish them most, so you never lose hope in the time when you will have your parents as well.

Years went by, and you have not heard from Xiaojun since then. You turned seven and you are still in the orphanage, still optimistic about being adopted until you turned ten. Surely it is disappointing for you as the years pass by, not being chosen by any parents who seek for a child that they want to take care of. You start to feel insecure about yourself, wondering what could be wrong with you. Your bright personality starts to shift from being gloomy and quiet, can be because of adolescence too but mostly because of longing to have your own family.

****

Xiaojun is adopted by a rich family. His father is a businessman while his mother is a housewife. Xiaojun’s father is not able to reproduce hence they adopted a child. The moment his mother saw him in the orphanage, she knew Xiaojun is the child she wants to take care of, and so did his father. Xiaojun is filled with love and care as he grows up, something that he is always thankful for. It was not difficult for him to become close to his parents, they bonded most of the time and always tends to his needs.

“Mom, what flower is that?” the ten-year-old Xiaojun asks his mother as she waters the plants in their garden. Xiaojun’s interest is taken by those fully bloomed red flowers.

“This one? They’re called Anthurium. It means kindness,” she replies. Xiaojun gets impressed at how beautiful the flower is, with its shapes like a heart and its representation of kindness.

“Mom, I have a thought,” Xiaojun tells her mother about the event he wants to do this Christmas. Ever since he left the orphanage, he asked his parents to donate there every December. There were times they casually gave food, clothes, and some books. But now, he wants to officially make it a program for the orphanage.

****

“Y/n! Come, the other children are in the auditorium. There will be a program, it’s gonna be exciting!” one of the caretakers calls you as you sit in your bed. You tag along with him as you both enter the auditorium. There is an ongoing program for the children, gifts and food are being given away. You gladly join the rest of the children and play at the games they organized.

The next day, you go out to the garden to see the gardeners setting up several pots. The red flowers caught your eyes as they beautifully bloom, it brightens the ambiance of the whole garden. “Pretty aren’t they?” one of the gardeners tells you as he puts down a pot of plant beside you.

“What are they called?” you ask.

“Anthurium. It symbolizes hos-,”

“Hospitality and kindness,” you cut him off. The gardener is impressed by your knowledge. “I have read that in a book. The meaning is beautiful, just like how it looks like,” you continue as you look at the flowers being planted all around the grounds of the orphanage. It did give the place a livelier vibe and knowing its meaning makes you feel motivated again regarding your adoption. “May I ask, where did these flowers come from? Did Mrs. Park buy all of them?”

“It’s from the donor that also organized the Christmas party last night,” the gardener replies.

“Did you know their names?”

“Unfortunately, not. Mrs. Park says the donor is anonymous, they only left the donations with S.S as their initial,” the gardener tells you once more as he proceeds to plow the soil.

The Anthuriums have become your source of hope and motivation. Seeing them grow in the garden makes you feel emotionally attached to them. You have helped the gardeners each day in watering and taking good care of them. The donors have not failed to give out Anthuriums annually and still has not told the orphanage their real identities. You wanted to especially give your appreciation to the donors, but you did not know whom to address it too, hence you made a promise to yourself that you will do the same by the time you are already adopted. Not a few years more of hoping and waiting, a family adopts you.

The family of Lee’s have filled your life with utmost love and appreciation ever since you came into their lives. There had not been days that they made you feel different, hence it is always the other way around. Your dreams of being in a family have gotten true, and you could not have made it if it were not for the anthuriums and the S.S that have become your inspiration. Growing up with the Lee’s, you have shared your donations to the orphanage as well, just as you have promised.  And until now, you are trying to find the mysterious S.S that has been donating to Mrs. Park’s.

Hearing your wonderful story, the caretakers feel inspired and touched by your generous heart despite everything that happened to your life. “I’m so glad that you’ve grown into a wonderful person now y/n. Your positivity and energetic character have not changed and I’m glad to see you again,” Mrs. Park tells you. The program ended successfully, the children had fun and the caretakers as well. You take a little tour of the garden to see the anthuriums that you have been taking care of before.

“Oh my god I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to. I-I was too busy looking around,” you tell the man you bumped into, nervously laughing as you try to apologize.

“No, it’s alright, don’t worry. Your reason’s valid, this garden looks beautiful,” he says with an assuring grin.

“Yeah. I helped Mr. Kim take care of these plants and flowers, they are quite special for me,” you chuckle hearing the guy’s compliment. “You see, I used to live here when I was a kid. As I get older, I thought no one will adopt me. Until these flowers came into my life, they are so beautiful. And its meaning, it's so inspiring,” you continue. The guy looks at you with interest and curiosity, as he feels the same when looking at those flowers.

“It means kindness and hospitality,” the guy mentions. "My family used to give anthuriums in this orphanage. I used to live here as well but not that long,” he starts telling his own story. “My mom plants the same flowers at home and I found them beautiful the moment I saw it, so I told them to donate some here yearly. In part of the Christmas event that we’ve been doing here,”

“Don’t tell me you’re the... S.S? The one who’s been doing Christmas events here?” you confusingly asked. The guy nods to your question, making you gasp at the revelation. “Oh my god! I have been trying to find you since I was here. I could not believe this, it’s been an honor,” you tell him. All he could do is chuckle at your reaction, he could feel your genuine appreciation that he finds it adorable for you to react this way. “So now that I’ve actually seen who S.S. is, may I know your name?” you ask once more.

“Xiaojun. My name is Xiaojun,” he says with a shy smile. You are left speechless at that moment. the person you have been looking for all this time is the same person who has become your friend in the orphanage. The shy little boy Xiaojun. You could not do anything except to hug him, excitement rushes into your body knowing how much you have missed your friend. It has been so long since the last time you talked and saw each other. And now that he is here, it is like the gods have aligned the planets and stars for you to meet in this place. Xiaojun does not know what is happening at all, he thought maybe you are that thankful enough to hug him, so he let you.

“Xiaojun! I have been looking for you, you idiot. This is me, y/n!” you say, still hugging him tightly. The two of you had a few more talks after that, catching up on how your lives have been throughout the years. You found out how he is still the same Xiaojun you met years ago but is now more positive and brighter.

“So that’s what S.S. means,” you say as you sip your cup of coffee.

“Secret Santa, yes,” Xiaojun nods. “My stay in the orphanage wouldn’t be memorable if it weren’t for you y/n. You have been a good friend to me and the other kids as well, it’s the only thing I could do to give back you know,” he adds.

“Well, if it weren’t for those anthuriums that you gave, I wouldn’t be able to find my own family and organize my own Christmas event as well. So, I just wanna say thank you as well, for being the kind person that you are,” you reply. The rest of the talk went on from throwbacks up to planning on how you and Xiaojun will join forces into making next year’s Christmas event more memorable for the kids.

Isn’t it beautiful how our little acts of kindness could affect other people so much? So, always stay kind and good, even if they do not deserve it.

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