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So...Who Broke It?

Summary:

Somebody broke Leblanc's pour over coffee-maker, and the Phantoms need to figure out who did it.

(Very Short and Sweet)

Notes:

I had to.

I just couldn't help myself.

This has been in my documents for months, I just didn't post it. This is obviously one big Parks and Recreation reference for those who have seen the show or know this particular popular scene. However, I did inject small changes and one big one.

For those who haven't seen the show, this has two twists.

For those who have, it has one twist.

I HIGHLY doubt it, but PLEASE let me be the first person to have this idea or at least be the first to post it anywhere.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Ren crossed his arms, looking around at the nervous faces of his teammates. He placed an object down on the table in front of them, the silence in the Leblanc attic was deafening.

 

What laid before them all was a broken pour over coffee-maker. 

 

"So...who broke it?" All of the thieves began looking around at one another, no one speaking. "I'm not mad...I just wanna know.

 

Everyone still remained quiet.

 

Makoto suddenly spoke up, "Ren, I did! I broke i-"

 

"No. No you didn't," the leader interrupted his girlfriend. "Futaba?"

 

"Don't look at me. Look at Inari."

 

Yusuke's eyes widened in surprise, "What? That's absurd! I didn't break it."

 

"Oh? Then how'd you know it was broken?"

 

"It's sitting right in front of us, and it's broken."

 

Futaba squinted her eyes at him, "Suspicious."

 

"No! It definitely isn't!"

 

Ryuji raised a hand up, "I don't know if it matters, dude. Probably not, but Ann was the last one to use it."

 

The blonde quickly turned around to face Ryuji, "What?! I don't even know how to use the coffee maker!"

 

"Oh yeah? Then what were you doing over by it earlier?"

 

"I was using the wooden stirs to push back my cuticles! Everyone knows that, Ryuji!"

 

Makoto got in between them, "Okay, let's not fight. I broke it, Ren. Just let me pay for it."

 

Ren shook his head, his voice growing louder. "No! Who broke it?!"

 

Everyone was silent once more, until Yusuke stepped forward. "Ren...Haru has been very quiet."

 

"Hey!"

 

I'm just sayi-"

 

Ryuji jumped up from the couch, "She is the only other person who can brew coffee."

 

Ann shouted, "Wow, deflecting to Haru? Real mature of you two!"

 

"Hey! If Yusuke was lying he'd probably go after Futaba! And I'd obviously go after Morgana! Actually, he is here all the time…"

 

The cat perked up on the bed, "I like living here! Why would I break Boss' stuff? I'd be out on the street in seconds!"

 

"Whatever, cat! I wasn't even tryin' to blame you! I'm just saying maybe Yusuke is on to something. If not Haru, then I think it's definitely Futaba."

 

Futaba threw her arms up, "Why would I break it?! Sojiro would ground me for a year!"

 

Shouts grew louder as the Phantoms all began to argue and accuse one another. Makoto put her head in her hands, sighing as the yelling magnified. Her lover gently took her by the hand, leading her towards the staircase. Ren grabbed the coffee-maker, walking downstairs just in time to see Sojiro walk in.

 

"Hey ki-...What the hell is all that commotion upstairs?" His eyes moved down to the broken machinery in Ren's hands. "And what the hell happened to my coffee-maker?!"

 

Ren placed it on the counter, "I broke it. It burned my hand, so I punched it." Ren looked up at the stairs, the shouts still growing. "I predict in about 10 minutes they'll be at each other's throats with war paint on their faces and a pig's head on a stick...Haru will probably win." Ren smirked, chuckling to himself. "Good. Things were getting a little too chummy around here." 

 

"...What?"

 

"Nevermind." Ren pulled out his wallet, throwing a huge sum of yen on the counter. "Buy a real nice, new one. On me. C'mon, Mako." He quickly led Makoto out of the building and on to the streets of Yongen-Jaya.

 

Makoto shook her head, a frown on her face. "I can't believe we just did that. It was wrong."

 

"Well, it's what they get for spying on us during our last date."

 

"No, not that. I'm quite satisfied with the punishment we just gave them. I'm talking about lying to Boss." Makoto lifted her right hand, a small red burn just past her thumb. "You took the blame for something I did."

 

Ren leaned down and kissed her temple, "And I'd do it again. Anything for you, my Queen."

 

She blushed, averting her eyes away from him. "I-I still think I should take responsibility for my actions. But...thank you."

 

"Of course. Besides, it was extremely sexy to watch you break that thing in two with one punch." Once again, Makoto hid her face in her hands as she groaned in embarrassment. "And it was so cute how determined you were to make coffee like me." Makoto simply continued to groan in response. "How many tables have you broken because you stubbed your toe?"

 

"Ren!" Ren laughed, wrapping his arm around her waist as they made it to the train station, both ready for their date away from the distracted Phantoms. "...Three."

 

Ren's eyes widened, not expecting the response. "Oh...well, that's a shame. I was betting on 5."

 

Makoto giggled, "You would've been right if Sis had not gotten tired of buying tables."

 

"Damn. Well, I'll get it next time." The couple laughed together, boarding their train ready to embark on their next adventure to broaden their horizons.

 

Notes:

Once again, one big reference.

I am going to do a full blown Ren and Makoto story later on. Most likely about Makoto and Ren meeting just before school starts, and moving through the story from there.

I will be taking this scene and putting it in that story whenever it happens.

I know not a lot of people will read this, but I don't care. I had so much fun putting certain characters in spots and putting my own small twists on the dialogue here and there.

 

All just for fun. I hope you had fun too. Now, back to writing my real stuff.