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“It’s three days from now,” Felix said. “Don’t fuck it up this time.”
Sylvain slouched on the couch, rolling his eyes while he pressed the phone to his ear. “Come on, Felix, have a little faith.”
“Two years ago you brought some girl you spent the night with. Faith,” he could practically hear Felix roll his eyes over the phone. “You think you’ve earned it?”
“Ingrid brings Dorothea every year,” Sylvain said, mostly to be contrary. Sometimes if he did it right he could make Felix hiss like a cat.
“Ingrid and Dorothea have been dating since they were in college,” Felix snapped. “Dedue and Ashe, almost as long. But since you are incapable of forming any kind of lasting relationship, you are banned from bringing dates. Got it?”
That stung more than Sylvain wanted to admit, especially because Felix was the one saying it. Part of him wanted to point out that Felix never had a significant other to bring either. Instead, he found himself saying the stupidest possible thing, because that was what Felix did to him. “I’m seeing someone.”
There was silence on the line for a long moment.
“No you aren’t,” Felix said. He sounded angry, but then, he always did.
“I am,” Sylvain said, digging himself a hole he wasn’t sure he’d be able to crawl out of. “We’ve been dating for a couple months. You know, like a real relationship.”
Silence reigned again. If Felix had been there in person, Sylvain might have been able to read the silence. Angry, disbelieving? His stupid heart said Maybe he’s jealous, but Sylvain crushed it down with all of his might.
“Fine,” Felix said, still clipped. “Then bring them.”
It almost sounded like a challenge. Knowing Felix, it probably was, and that meant Sylvain absolutely couldn’t back down.
“Fine,” he said. “I will.”
After Felix hung up, Sylvain spent a few minutes wondering what spirit of idiocy had possessed him. Then he spent a few more wondering how to get himself out of this stupid situation that he had only himself to blame for. Fake sick? Actually break his leg? Hire a professional actor to pretend to be the significant other he absolutely did not have just so the guy he’d been in love with for years would think he was less pathetic?
In the end, there was really only one choice.
“Come on, Claude. It’s just for a day. Not even the whole day!”
“Even a few hours spent as your fake boyfriend is a few too many.” Claude said it with a smile, but Sylvain knew him too well to think that smile meant anything at all. “Why me? You had to know I’d say no.”
Sylvain had known that, but he’d been counting on managing to convince Claude anyway. He wasn’t willing to give up yet, either - unlike many people, he knew Claude well enough to be able to to tell the difference between a ‘maybe if you convince me’ no and a ‘get out of my face’ no. He hadn’t quite gotten to the second yet.
“I need someone who actually knows me,” he said. “These are my childhood friends, they’ll figure it out in a second if someone tries to fake it. So I figured, why not the only ex I’m on good terms with?”
“I’m not your ex,” Claude said. “We slept together twice. That does not count as dating.”
“Three times.”
“Two and a half.” Claude rolled his eyes. “And by those standards, Hilda’s your ex too.”
Sylvain winced at the all-too-vivid memory of the moment he discovered that Claude and Hilda not only knew each other, but were best friends. They’d spent most of an evening roasting him for his flirtation methods, his performance in bed, and his shortcomings as a person. It had been enough to wipe the momentary ‘threesome?’ thought from his brain and replace it with ‘never touch the genitals of either of these people again’.
But they’d ended up being great friends, so that had worked out.
“Hilda would be terrible at this. She’d get sick of it halfway through and blow my cover. Plus, she’s going home for Christmas tomorrow.” Sylvain shrugged. “Come on, Claude, you’re my only hope. You know me well enough to fake it, and you’re a great actor. You’re hot and charming, they’ll all be super impressed.”
“Don’t try to flatter me into this,” Claude said, but his smile was a little more genuine. “Anyway, I’m not stupid. When you say ‘impressed’, you mean jealous, and when you say ‘them’ you mean Felix.”
Fuck. Claude knew too much. He really needed to get some dirt on Claude in return - this wasn’t fair.
“I don’t care what Felix thinks,” he said with a carefree shrug.
“That’s not what you told me when we got drunk on Valentine’s Day and you spent an hour crying on my shoulder about how he doesn’t love you back.”
Ugh. Brutal. Maybe it would be better to just change his name and flee the country. There was no way he could find enough dirt on Claude to make up for that mistake.
“Fine,” Sylvain said, frowning at Claude, “maybe I do care. What does it matter? You get to come and spend a fun day doing holiday shit with my friends, I’ll pay for everything, Felix maybe gets super jealous, I feel good about myself. And you get an unspecified favor from me at some future point in time, and yes, I do realize that means I’ll probably be hiding a body for you someday.”
“What if - and this is going to blow your mind - what if instead you just told Felix you’ve had feelings for him for years? Rip the bandaid off. Maybe he’ll fall into your arms or maybe not, but at least you’ll be able to move on.”
“Who are you, my therapist?” Sylvain said. He tried to make it playful, but it came out a little too sharp, a little too mean. But Claude only smiled.
“You could not pay me enough money to do that job.” He shrugged. “Just an idea. Just a crazy thought, instead of this totally reasonable plan where I fake date you in front of all your dearest friends.”
“You’re my dearest friend, Claude.” Sylvain gave Claude his most effective puppy dog eyes. “Or you will be, if you say yes. I’ll owe you my firstborn. My very life. And hey, you’ll get to go ice skating.”
Claude looked at him for a long, silent moment. Sylvain looked back, trying to guess what might be going on in his head.
“Fine,” Claude said. Sylvain grinned. “But if this all goes horribly wrong, I’m recording the most embarrassing part and using it to make myself TikTok famous.”
“That seems fair,” Sylvain said. He could already imagine the look on Felix’s face. This would so be worth it.
Claude should probably have anticipated that ice skating would be cold, given the convenient clue in the name of the activity. And in his defense, he had dressed warm. It just hadn’t turned out to be quite warm enough to overcome his deep dislike of the cold.
He’d probably have stayed warmer if he’d kept skating, but those were the sacrifices one had to make in order to ensure things went according to plan. So now there he was, on one of the benches next to the rink, watching people skate in circles and trying not to shiver.
“You look cold,” someone said next to him, and Claude looked up - and up - to see Dimitri Blaiddyd.
Sylvain’s friends, as a group, were pretty friendly. Most of them had been happy to meet him, had made an attempt to welcome him, and he was even pretty sure he remembered all of their names. Sure, Felix had scowled pretty hard, but that was all for the best (and Claude had gotten a kick out of smiling back like he had no idea).
He hadn’t really spoken to any of them, though, not beyond the initial introductions. They’d met at the skating rink, and once his skates were on he’d spent most of his time clinging to Sylvain’s arm, trying to learn how to skate without injuring himself.
(He really wished that had all been an act to make them believe in the relationship - and to make Felix scowl even more - but in fact Claude had only managed to stay upright by himself after fifteen minutes of work. Embarrassing, especially with Sylvain laughing in his ear and making fun everytime he slipped.
At least it had probably looked like affectionate coaching instead.)
But though he hadn’t really spoken to Dimitri, it would be a lie to say that Claude hadn’t noticed him. How could he not? Dimitri was tall, blond, and gorgeous, and his friends orbited him like he was a quiet sun. Claude didn’t know for sure, but if pressed he would have bet that Dimitri was the ultimate source of this friend group, the one who had brought the others together - though after long years of friendship, they’d clearly all developed bonds of their own.
“I’m freezing,” Claude said with a laugh. “I’m just not built for the cold.”
Dimitri smiled, a kind and slightly bashful thing. “Let me get you some hot cocoa.”
“Thanks,” Claude said, and when he smiled this time Dimitri looked ever-so-briefly stunned.
It would have been flattering - it was flattering - except that Claude immediately remembered he was supposed to be Sylvain’s date, and therefore flirting with his hot friend was off limits.
Life was cruel and unfair. He turned the wattage on his smile down a bit.
“Uh,” Dimitri said, “I’ll be right back, then.”
He came back quickly, holding two cups of cocoa, and took a seat next to Claude - but only after looking at him first and waiting for a nod, making sure it was okay. He was so polite.
“Are you having fun?” Dimitri asked as Claude sipped the drink, careful not to burn his tongue.
He nodded. “Everyone’s been great.”
“Thank you for coming. It’s… nice to meet someone that Sylvain’s serious about.”
Dimitri looked at him with such sincerity that Claude almost gave up the game right there. It felt wrong to lie to this man. But he couldn’t do it too soon, so he just smiled.
“It’s nice to finally meet all of you, too. He talks about you all the time.” That was true, at least. Part of the reason Claude could remember so many people’s names so easily was because he was really just putting faces to the names of people in the stories Sylvain had told. He clearly missed spending time with them, so Claude didn’t know why he hadn’t moved closer after graduation.
Well. Maybe he did know.
“He… ah, he’s mentioned you, as well.” Dimitri’s gaze skittered away. He was a terrible liar. “You… met at work?”
They’d met at Claude’s part time job two years ago, a coffee shop he’d worked at while finishing up his master’s. Sylvain had hit on him, and Claude had been lonely and frustrated because of a roadblock in his research. He’d intended for Sylvain to be a brief distraction, but though he had only surface knowledge of Claude’s field, he’d been clever enough to ask a question that had ultimately sent Claude down a much more helpful path.
Which was why they’d stayed friends afterwards. Unfortunately for Claude’s ego, it turned out they had a lot in common, not the least of which was being unlucky in love - Sylvain because he’d been hung up on one guy for years, Claude because he had a hard time trusting anyone.
“Yeah,” Claude said. “Work.” He grinned at Dimitri. “It’s a pretty boring story, really.” He glanced out at the rink, where he could see Sylvain skating next to Felix, deep in what seemed to be a heated conversation. Good. “You’re all so good at this. I think I made a fool of myself out there.”
“Not at all,” Dimitri said. He smiled at Claude, a sweet and tentative thing. “The winters where most of us grew up were very cold, so there was skating every winter. And now we meet up like this every year, too. We have more experience, that’s all.” He looked out at the ice too. “Is that why you stopped? I think you were doing quite well.”
Had Dimitri been watching him attempt to skate? That was simultaneously flattering and very embarrassing. “Oh, no. I was just getting tired, you know. I needed a break.” He’d needed to initiate Phase One of the Get Sylvain’s Head Out of His Ass plan, which required close contact with Felix to both ensure that his feelings still lingered and remind him why his feelings lingered.
“I hope you don’t feel left out,” Dimitri said. His gaze settled on Sylvain for a moment, then moved away. “I know it can be… difficult to join a group like ours, where we know each other so well.” He paused. “I didn’t like seeing you sitting here alone. I love Sylvain dearly, but I know that at times he can be… careless.”
Claude wanted to laugh, but swallowed it down. He could hear the subtext in those words, the way Dimitri was carefully avoiding pointing out that Sylvain had essentially abandoned his supposed boyfriend to skate with his friends. And he knew, too, that Dimitri had to be well aware of Sylvain’s track record with relationships - the broken hearts and upset lovers he left in his wake.
Claude wasn’t one of them, but Dimitri was worried that he might be someday. And that was - well, sweet, really.
If Claude had actually been Sylvain’s boyfriend he might have found it upsetting, even insulting. But he wasn’t, and he was well aware of the carelessness Dimitri was alluding to. If anything, what he’d expected from Sylvain’s friends had been suspicion and wariness. Instead, Dimitri seemed worried about him.
Was he even real?
“Oh, I’ll be fine. I don’t want to ruin his fun. Besides, it’s nice to finally get to talk to one of his closest friends.”
Dimitri smiled at him, and Claude seriously felt his heart skip a beat. It was unfair to meet someone so handsome and so kind when he was currently pretending to be dating someone else. “And I am glad to meet you as well, Claude. I can see why Sylvain is so taken with you. Thank you for agreeing to spend the day with us.”
Oh. That wasn’t good. Dimitri was just being polite, Claude told himself, just being a welcoming friend. He should not read anything into those words, not even if he very badly wanted to.
“Well, I wanted to meet all of you. But if I’m being totally honest, I really came for another reason entirely.” Claude allowed himself a moment of quiet honesty. Dimitri didn’t seem like the type to exploit it - he probably wouldn’t even realize that it meant anything to Claude.
That was nice.
“My family doesn’t celebrate Christmas. We do plenty of other stuff that’s frankly pretty great, but - well, I used to see it in movies and tv shows all the time.” He smiled, a touch wistful, remembering the boy he’d once been, watching foreign movies with big eyes. “I always kind of wanted to try it all out. So I figured, why not?”
Dimitri was looking at him with a soft expression, one that made Claude want to make a joke, to deflect. But Claude swallowed down the impulse. Something about Dimitri’s sincerity was catching, it seemed. A possibly fatal illness.
“I knew this was the first time you’d been ice-skating. Sorry,” Dimitri flushed, “it was obvious. But if everything else is new to you, too, well - I very much look forward to showing you how we celebrate, Claude.”
Hopefully Dimitri would think the red in his cheeks was a product of the cold and nothing more. “Aw, thanks. I'm looking forward to the warmer stuff too, I gotta admit.”
“Ah,” Dimitri said, perking up. “After this we’ll go back to my house. It will be quite warm, I promise.” He paused, then continued with a touch of shyness in his voice. “Some of us will be decorating, and of course you’re welcome to join them, but - perhaps you could join us in the kitchen instead. Dedue and Ashe help me make cookies every year, and it will be much warmer in there. Sylvain doesn’t usually join us, but of course he’s welcome as well.” The last part was added almost as an afterthought, and once again Claude had to remind himself not to flirt, not to get his hopes up.
“I’m not much of a cook, but that sounds great,” he said.
“Oh, don’t worry. Dedue is accomplished enough for us all. He saves me from my mistakes every year.”
“Then how can I say no?” He smiled, and Dimitri’s answering smile made another decision for him.
The Get Sylvain’s Head Out Of His Ass plan was going up a notch. Claude wasn’t going to let what tiny chance he had with this man disappear because Sylvain was too emotionally unbalanced to confess his feelings.
He’d have to get serious.
“Let’s do the lights,” Sylvain said. “You’ve got a good sense of style, I’ve got the height to hang them, and hey - you slip on the ladder, I catch you, we get a whole romantic scene going. Everyone’s gonna buy it.”
“No,” Claude said, unwrapping the scarf around his neck.
“Oh, come on. We won’t be out there long, and then we’ll come back in where it’s warm.” Sylvain gave Claude his best puppy dog eyes, though he was well aware Claude was immune to them. “No one’s going to buy this if we don’t have a few romantic moments.”
“And it has nothing to do with the fact that Felix is doing the decorations too?” Claude smiled, a sharp thing. “How about you just talk to him already? You’re both adults. This has been going on way too long. Anyway, I’ve got plans.”
“You’ve got plans? You said you’d stay for the whole day.” Sylvain had driven them there, too, so it wasn’t like Claude could just leave.
Claude took off his jacket, leaning across Sylvain to hang it up. He pressed against Sylvain for a moment as he did so, and Sylvain had to admit he was pretty cold. Claude had never done well with the cold. Maybe it was a little mean to make him go out in it again.
“Mm. Dimitri doesn’t want me to feel left out, so he invited me to make cookies with him. I don’t want you getting in the way of me spending time with your gorgeous friend, who by the way I’m pretty sure is actually one of those time-traveling princes from a Hallmark movie.”
That was a surprise. Or maybe it wasn’t. He didn’t know what Claude’s type usually was, but the kind of sincerity and kindness at Dimitri’s core was probably like catnip to a guy like Claude who was always watching his own back.
He should have introduced them sooner. He felt kinda bad now, getting in the way like this.
“He’s gonna think it’s weird if you start flirting with him when you’re supposed to be dating me.”
“Don’t worry,” Claude said cryptically, “I have a plan. Now go do your lights while I stay in the warm kitchen and eat cookie dough. If you still need a public display of affection after that, I’ll hold your hand while we all go look at the lights. I’ll even kiss your cheek. Once.”
“Deal,” Sylvain said, and Claude grinned at him and disappeared into the house.
Sylvain hadn’t taken his winter jacket off, so he just headed back out. After years of doing this, he knew where the decorations were kept and knew Dimitri would have unlocked it for them already. He made his way through the snow to the shed and tugged the string, switching the light on.
He was opening a box to retrieve the strings of lights when he heard the door open behind him.
“Oh,” Felix said, distinctly unimpressed. “You’re here.”
“Don’t sound too happy about it,” Sylvain said with a grin, ignoring the twinge in his chest. “It’ll take us both to carry them all out, anyway. Might as well put those skinny arms of yours to use.”
Felix rolled his eyes and went to another box, filling said skinny (but leanly muscled, unfortunately for Sylvain’s libido) arms with shiny stars and snowman lawn ornaments. He didn’t say anything, but Sylvain felt eyes on him once or twice. The air felt heavy, now that they were alone together. Or maybe that was just his imagination.
Felix had been grouchy all day. That wasn’t too out of the ordinary, all things considered, but Sylvain couldn’t put his finger on why it felt different this time. He’d wanted it to - he’d wanted to get some tiny bit of jealousy out of bringing Claude along, pretending there was someone he was actually serious about.
And Felix was upset, Sylvain thought, but somehow it didn’t satisfy him the way he’d thought it might.
Oh well. He’d done stupider things. He’d just suffer through the day and figure out something else later - maybe an epic staged breakup with Claude. Or something.
Coil of lights in his hands, Sylvain left the shed. Or tried to.
“Uh,” he said, frowning at the door, securely shut. “You didn’t lock the door when you came in, did you?”
“You think I’m an idiot?” Felix said, scowling. He set down the plastic snowflake he was holding and came over, pushing at the door. It did not yield. “What the fuck?”
“The latch must have slipped shut.” That didn’t really make sense, it had never happened before in all the years they’d been doing this, but Sylvain didn’t have another explanation. “No worries, we’ll just text Ingrid. She’s always got her phone on her.”
Felix was still frowning. “I left my phone inside.”
Sylvain reached into his pocket, where he had his phone. It was empty. Suddenly, and for no reason at all, he remembered the moment Claude had leaned across him to hang his coat up, pressing their bodies together.
That little bastard.
How about you just talk to him already? he heard in his mind. And, don’t worry. I have a plan.
He had always known that Claude was not to be trusted, but he’d gotten too caught up in his own plans. He’d let down his guard.
And now he was locked in a shed with the man he’d had feelings for since they were children.
Felix was looking at him. He knew Sylvain too well - he saw the moment Sylvain realized his phone was gone, too. He just sighed, rolling his eyes. “Whatever. Your boyfriend will notice you’re gone.”
There was a certain venom to the word boyfriend. Again Sylvain thought about how he should be sickly satisfied, but instead he just felt sick. Why had he even wanted to make Felix jealous? What was the point of all this?
It had been his fault in the beginning. He’d been young and stupid - not like he was any smarter now - and when Felix had awkwardly confessed to him he’d blown it all up, and their friendship with it. He’d hated himself so much back then. Self-destruction had been a habit. It didn’t matter that he’d returned Felix’s feelings - all that mattered was finding a new way to hurt himself.
He was doing better now. Things weren’t perfect - self-destruction was still a familiar bad habit - but he had a steady job and good friends. He still wasn’t capable of maintaining a relationship, but if he was being honest, he never really tried. It was easier to just have fun, especially when his heart had never stopped being hung up on Felix.
Who he knew very well he’d never have a chance with again. Whatever feelings Felix had once had for him, they’d settled into a prickly friendship laced with resentment. And that was Sylvain’s fault.
How could he expect more? How could he ask for more?
But right then, another question felt more pressing, more real.
How could he let things go on as they were?
Claude had been right. On some level, Sylvain had known that all along. And maybe on some level that was why he’d brought Claude. Because Claude had no use for his bullshit, would force him to do something about this, even if it meant locking him in a freezing storage shed.
He’d done it earlier, even. When they’d been ice skating, Claude had made up an excuse to ditch him the second Felix skated up, a scowl on his face. And they’d had fun, too. With their friends around and Claude out of sight, Sylvain could play up to Felix’s competitive nature without it being awkward. Felix had even grinned at him once, and all of the feelings Sylvain had tried to bury had come right back to life.
He’d known what Claude was doing then. He should have expected this. But did that mean he shouldn’t take the chance he’d been given?
It was almost impossible for him to get Felix alone these days. Ever since things had gone bad - since he’d made them bad - Felix had carefully avoided any alone time with him. Even Annette had commented on it once, though Sylvain had brushed it off with a laugh.
But now he was here, and they were alone, and neither of them could run away. If only Sylvain had enough confidence to do the right thing.
“Claude isn’t my boyfriend,” he said. His stomach twisted. Now that he’d been honest, he had to go through with it. There was no going back.
“What?” Felix scowled at him. “What are you talking about?”
“So… I might have lied. A little.” He laughed, trying to force his voice to stay light. “Claude and I aren’t dating. He’s just a friend.”
“You introduced him as your boyfriend,” Felix said, voice flat.
“Haha. Yeah, sorry.” Sylvain rubbed the back of his head. “I know it sounds weird -“
“It sounds fucking insane. So, what? What was your plan here? Bring a fake boyfriend and… make us all think you were actually happy for once?”
That stung more than it had any right to. Was his unhappiness so clear? It wasn’t like he was always miserable, not anymore. He was doing much better than he once had. It was just when it came to romance and relationships that he continued to fail, again and again.
Because he just couldn’t let go.
Maybe it really was time. Rip the band-aid off. When Felix rejected him, maybe it would finally let him move on.
“No,” he said, and took a deep breath, and smiled. “I really just wanted to make you jealous.”
Felix stared. “What?”
“It was maybe not my best idea.” Sylvain leaned back on the boxes behind him, doing his best to seem casual, seem like talking about this wasn’t like tearing his heart out. “I figured, bring along a boyfriend, you might get jealous, and I could pretend I still had a chance. But, y’know, not do anything about it.”
When he said it out loud it sounded not only stupid, but also very shitty. Was this really who he was? It wasn’t who he wanted to be. He wanted to be better, he wanted to be - the kind of guy Felix could be with without regret.
Damn, he was an idiot.
“You’re an idiot,” Felix said, as if this was the first time he’d realized that, even though it most assuredly was not. “And your friend agreed to this? He’s an idiot too.”
“I’m starting to think he agreed to it just so he could lock me in a shed with you,” Sylvain said. Felix made an expression somewhere in the gray area between amused and disgusted.
“When I told you I liked you,” he said abruptly, “you turned me down.”
“I know. I was… I don’t know. Stupid. Self-destructive. I’d say I didn’t think I was good enough, but the thing is, I wasn’t good enough. Not back then. I would have really hurt you, probably totally destroyed our friendship. That wasn’t why I did it at the time, but I know it’s true now.”
Felix looked at him for a long moment. “So what are you saying, then.”
Sylvain looked him in the eye and dragged that honesty out from inside of himself. It was time. “I’ve been in love with you since we were teenagers. I blew my chance, and I’ve regretted it ever since. Even though it was my fault. Even though I know it wouldn’t have ended well. If that was the only chance I ever get with you… we’ll, it’ll be what I deserve. I’m a fucking idiot, Felix. But I love you.”
He didn’t know what he expected. All expectations, of rejection or acceptance or anything in between, had fallen away. All Sylvain felt was the heart-stopping fear that came with honesty. Whatever happened would happen. At least he had done it.
Needless to say, he was surprised when Felix’s response was to say, “Oh, goddamnit,” grab him by the collar, and kiss him.
The kitchen was nice and warm, and Claude looked like he was having a good time, at least. His eyes were bright and his smile brighter, enough so that Dimitri found it difficult to look away.
He pushed away all feelings of envy or self-pity. He really was happy that Sylvain had met someone like Claude - someone clever and observant, kind and handsome. Sylvain was one of Dimitri’s best friends, and he deserved to be happy. Sure, on some level Dimitri had always hoped that Sylvain and Felix would work things out, and sure, it did feel just a tiny bit unfair that Sylvain was dating someone who Dimitri found incredibly attractive, when he felt that way about so few people. But that was an unwarranted feeling - he wouldn’t even have met Claude if Sylvain hadn’t started dating him. It didn’t matter that he’d never felt such an instant pull towards someone before. He would befriend Claude, and Sylvain would be happy, and everything would be all right.
Besides, he could at least be selfish and steal a tiny bit of Claude’s time and attention. He was doing so now, showing Claude the steps involved in making Dedue’s spice cookies. Dedue was overseeing them, but Dimitri had made these often enough that he could take the lead, allowing Dedue to claim the other counter and make thumbprint cookies with Ashe, only throwing a glance in their direction now and then to make sure nothing was on fire.
It meant that he - and the cookies - had all of Claude’s attention.
Well, almost all of it. He glanced at the clock now and then, as if he was waiting for something, or for a certain amount of time to pass. But Dimitri had to assume he was simply wondering when Sylvain would be finished with the decorations, and when he might be able to come back and steal him away from Dimitri.
No. Keep him company. Yes, that was a better way to put it.
“Now we just have to roll them out and cut out shapes. After they bake, we’ll decorate them,” he said, trying to keep his mind on the task. Claude smiled up at him.
“What kind of cookie cutters do you have? Maybe we can get creative.”
Dimitri could not help laughing, though his ears heated whenever Claude turned that smile on him. “I have ghost- and bat-shaped cookie cutters somewhere. Is that creative enough?”
“Absolutely. Let’s make this party spooky.” Claude bumped their arms together. “But get the holiday ones, too. Can’t forget the traditional stuff.”
Dimitri opened the cupboard, finding the cookie cutters on the top shelf and retrieving them easily. Claude eyed him - Dimitri was probably imagining it, but he thought it looked appreciative. “They grow ‘em tall where you guys are from, huh.”
Now Dimitri was sure he was blushing. “Ah, just myself. And - and Sylvain, of course. Felix is no taller than you.”
“Does he have to climb on your counters to get stuff down? Because I would.”
Dimitri laughed at the thought and had his mouth open to respond - he wasn’t sure how - when Ingrid came in. “Hey, can I borrow you?”
“Oh,” he said, crushing the seed of disappointment that wanted to sprout in his chest at the idea of losing what little time he had with Claude. “Of course. What can I help with?” It was his house, after all. Likely Ingrid and Mercedes, who were setting up the tree, needed help finding something. He set the cookie cutters on the counter - catching Claude glancing at the clock again, and trying not to feel anything about it - and followed Ingrid.
“Can you get the shed unlocked?” she said, heading toward the backdoor. “The ornaments are in there, but we can’t get in.”
Dimitri blinked. “I unlocked it earlier. The latch must have slipped shut accidentally - yes, of course I’ll get it for you.”
“Great!” Ingrid said. “Let me grab my coat and I’ll be there in a second.”
Dimitri didn’t bother getting his own coat. He’d always handled the cold remarkably well, and unlocking the latch would take a matter of seconds. He headed out, keys in hand, unlocked the door and swung it open -
And found Sylvain and Felix inside, wrapped around each other, kissing like it was their last day on earth.
“Oh,” Dimitri said. “I’m so sorry for interrupting. Um. Ingrid needs the box of ornaments.”
He stepped back and let the door swing shut, instinctively making sure the latch did not catch again. His eyes were wide as he processed what he had seen. He headed inside, passing Ingrid on the way out - at least they’d have time to pull apart before she got there - and pausing in the hallway just outside the kitchen.
He’d just seen Claude’s boyfriend kissing someone else.
It didn’t matter what he thought of Claude, or what he might have begun feeling. He loved Sylvain dearly and always would, but he also knew how his friend had often treated the ones he dated. He’d seen enough of Sylvain’s angry exes when they were all in school together, the girls who accused him of cheating, the occasional boy who left in tears.
He had wanted to believe in Sylvain, to think that he had changed. When he’d gotten to know Claude a bit, it had all made sense. Who, if they had that man, would want anyone else? Who would handle Claude’s heart with anything but the gentlest of care? Even Sylvain, with his checkered past, would not be so cruel.
And yet, he had seen what he had seen.
What was he going to do?
“Hey,” said Claude, who had just stepped out of the kitchen and was looking up at him with concern. “What’s wrong?”
Ideally, Dimitri would have had more time to think about his words. Time to judge what should be said and shouldn’t, time to grapple with his loyalty to Sylvain and his concern for Claude. But in that moment, he was admittedly still in shock, and so he said, “I found Sylvain kissing Felix.”
The second he said it, some part of him regretted it. He didn’t want to see heartbreak on Claude’s face, sadness in his eyes. Even if he hadn’t been the one to cause it, he never wanted to see either of those things. Claude deserved to smile, and laugh, and to be loved unreservedly.
But when he looked at Claude, he saw - of all things - relief.
“Oh, thank god,” Claude said.
Dimitri stared. “What?”
Claude smiled at him then, as bright as ever. Maybe a little brighter. “Sorry,” he said. “I haven’t been entirely honest. I’m not Sylvain’s boyfriend, I’m just a friend he talked into pretending for awhile. I’ve been trying to get him to confess to Felix for ages.” He paused. “Also, I locked them into the shed together.”
All Dimitri could say to that was, again, “...what?”
“I didn’t intend for it to go like this - I was going to give them half an hour or so and then take your keys, let them out, and tell you what was going on. So, sorry you had to see that. And I’m sorry for the lies as well.”
Dimitri’s head was spinning as this new version of the world fell into place. One thing stood out far more than all the rest, one thing that seemed vitally important in that moment: Claude wasn’t Sylvain’s boyfriend.
Dimitri had a chance.
Something else, though, made him smile. “You were going to take my keys? Right out of my pocket?”
Claude grinned at him. “I already took Sylvain’s cell phone.” He pulled a phone out of his pocket - undeniably Sylvain’s. “And I’m not gonna pass up an excuse to get close to you.”
That made Dimitri’s ears get hot again, but this time he didn’t admonish himself. This time, he didn’t try to force his thoughts away from how Claude made him feel. Because Claude wasn’t Sylvain’s boyfriend.
Although - “You… ah, you don’t have a boyfriend?”
“I’m totally single,” Claude said, and smiled at him, and Dimitri could swear his knees got weak.
After they’d eaten the cookies, after the tree had been decorated, after all the lights had been hung up outside, they went on a walk.
To Claude, who preferred to never go outside anytime after late fall, it seemed strange. But it was a tradition, apparently, to walk through Dimitri’s neighborhood and enjoy the lights and holiday displays. And if he was being honest, he’d really enjoyed all the traditions so far. He wasn’t going to refuse this one. Especially not when Dimitri was the one walking next to him.
Since the truth came out - since Sylvain had finally gotten his shit together - it felt like Dimitri had barely left his side, and Claude wouldn’t have it any other way. He’d been free to flirt to his heart’s content, free to enjoy the way Dimitri went red when he did. The news had circulated quickly, and though Ingrid had scolded both Claude and Sylvain, no one had really been that upset. It seemed like Claude wasn’t the only one who had been waiting for Sylvain and Felix to work their issues out.
He could see them ahead of him, walking close together. Claude was sure they had plenty to talk about, to work through, but for now they were just enjoying the night. He didn’t know Felix well, but he could see the embarrassed fondness in his gaze when he looked at Sylvain - and there was no questioning the way Sylvain looked at him in return.
Another plan pulled off perfectly. Well, almost perfectly. Sylvain had called him a ‘conniving little bastard’ once or twice, but he’d said it with a smile on his face. Their friendship would be just fine.
And Claude, who had expected to get nothing from this except a day of holiday festivities, had come out with far more.
“This is really nice,” he said, looking up at Dimitri. The dark sky above them, the glittering lights - and if he got cold, he was pretty sure Dimitri would volunteer to keep him warm. “You do this every year.”
“Yes,” Dimitri said, with a sweet smile down at him. “Perhaps you could come next year, too.”
Claude tried to ignore the way his heart jumped in his chest at the thought of that. He couldn’t get too excited. He was no good at love, no good at trust or relationships deeper than friendship.
But Dimitri made him want to be. More than anyone he’d met before, Dimitri made him want to learn.
“I’d like that,” he said, and they walked for a little further in silence, watching Dimitri’s friends ahead of them. Dedue, tall and straight, his arm around Ashe. Dorothea and Ingrid with their arms hooked together, laughing about something. Annette and Mercedes, cooing over some lights on a roof. Sylvain and Felix, walking side by side, close enough that their arms brushed with each step.
It really was nice. He thought, too, about showing Dimitri how his family celebrated their holidays - so vastly different, but at the core it was about togetherness, about love and connection. He thought Dimitri would like it. He wanted the chance to find out.
“You know,” Dimitri said, breaking the silence. “It’s actually my birthday.”
Claude was so startled he practically stumbled, catching himself just in time. “What?” No one had said anything about that. Sylvain hadn’t warned him. There’d been no birthday presents - nothing.
Dimitri caught his arm and steadied him, apparently without thinking. He was so solid, so conscientous with Claude. It really wasn’t fair that a man like that existed. “I used to hate celebrating it for… a lot of reasons. Back when we were in college, I asked if we could gather like this instead. Everyone will spend the actual day with their families, but we all come together on my birthday. We do all the things that make Sylvain tease me about being a basic bitch -” and the way Dimitri said that was so careful, so adorable that Claude had to laugh - “and I get to see them all, without the expectations of a birthday celebration. I don’t mind the thought of birthdays so much anymore, but I like this better. I wouldn’t change it for the world.”
“If it’s your birthday,” Claude said, “you should let me give you something.” He tugged at Dimitri’s arm, stopping him, letting his friends pull ahead.
Dimitri looked down at him, perplexed. “You don’t need to do that. And you didn’t know -”
“Shh,” Claude said. He reached up, curled his fingers around the back of Dimitri’s neck, and pulled him down so that they could kiss. As cold as the world was around them, Dimitri’s lips were warm and soft and perfect, and Claude wanted nothing else.
“Happy birthday,” he said softly when they parted. Dimitri smiled at him, his eyes gentle and full of tenderness. Around them, in the night, it began to snow.