Chapter Text
“Hey.”
“Hey.” Evan slid into the passenger seat of Jared’s car.
“Study for the history test?”
“Um, kinda?” Evan pulled his seatbelt on. “Not really.”
“Me neither.”
It was the third day of school but Evan was no more comfortable than he’d been on the first day. He was still trying to figure out which teachers he liked three days later and he was still trying to figure out if he and Jared were really friends three years later. There had been a time, before high school, when he was sure they were. But then things got weird and so here he was, senior year, still unsure about how to approach Jared. Of course, more often than not it was Jared who approached first so, that had to count for something. Besides, he’d offered to drive Evan to school this year in his brand new used car. So they were probably friends.
But today Evan wasn’t thinking about teachers or Jared or the history test when he walked onto campus. He was thinking about Connor Murphy. He’d only talked to him once, yesterday. They had been in the library. Connor had made a comment about Evan’s shirt and then they had a short conversation. Surprisingly, it was pretty nice. Evan had always thought Connor was kinda scary. But he seemed friendly enough when they talked, if a little socially stunted. But then, who was Evan to judge other people’s social skills? Of course, none of that was what Evan was thinking about either.
He was thinking about what happened directly afterward. When Connor had held up a piece of paper that very clearly said “Dear Evan Hansen” at the top and asked if it was Evan’s. It was. And it was absolutely not something Connor was allowed to read. So Evan had ripped it from his hands and tore out of the library. When he got home he thought about it for hours. How rude that was when Connor had clearly been trying to be nice to him. How stupid he must have looked. How Connor probably hated him now. So Evan had gotten it into his head that he needed to apologize. He needed to tell Connor he was just dealing with some stuff and that it had been nice to talk to him.
He walked into the hallway, leaving Jared at his locker, and scanned the groups of people, looking for Connor. He wasn’t really sure where he hung out. Maybe under the bleachers with the stoners? Maybe he was in the library like he was yesterday. Evan walked quickly toward the library doors since they were the closest option.
“Evan!” Alana Beck stepped in front of him. “I was wondering if you wanted to partner up for the final project for AP Lit. I know it’s a long way off but Mrs. Berkley said it’s going to be a lot of work and sometimes it’s so stressful trying to find a partner when you’re already on a time crunch so I just wanted to be prepared.”
“Oh uh…” Evan tried to peer around her as someone opened the library door. “Sure. I’ll be your partner.”
“Oh great!” Alana linked her arm through his and led him down the hallway.
“Oh I need to-”
“I was thinking we could make a powerpoint and-”
“Alana!” Evan stopped her. “I need to-” He was cut off again, by the bell this time.
“Oh right!” Alana smiled. “We’ll talk later! Bye Evan!”
Evan groaned and started toward his first period class.
“Hey.” Jared nodded as Evan dropped into the seat behind him. He twisted around to talk. “How’s the girlfriend?”
Evan frowned at him.
“Saw you and Alana in the hallway.” Jared explained, rolling his eyes that Evan didn’t get the joke.
“Oh. She’s not- we were just talking about our final project for lit.”
“It’s literally the third day of school.”
“I know.” Evan sighed. “But… you know Alana.”
“I do. And unfortunately I know you too.” Jared smirked. “You two are a catastrophic combination.”
“I know.” Evan mumbled, sinking down into his seat.
Jared shook his head and turned around to face forward.
The class passed extremely slowly, as Evan knew it would for the rest of the year. Math was his least favorite subject. He was partially glad he had it with Jared because Jared was really good at math and was always happy to help tutor. The downside was he loved helping Evan because he used it as an opportunity to make fun of him. Evan didn’t mind the teasing though, Jared really was a good teacher. He could take a little ribbing if it meant he passed calculus.
“Dude.” Jared snapped his fingers in front of Evan’s face. “You coming?”
Evan started and looked around. Everyone was standing and shuffling out of the room. He hurried to stand up and shove the rest of his stuff into his backpack. Jared sighed loudly but he waited anyway.
“What are you doing later?” Evan asked as they stepped into the crowded hallway.
Jared shrugged. “Homework. Probably video games at some point.”
“Cool.”
Jared gave him an annoyed look. “Are you waiting for me to ask what you’re doing?”
Evan shook his head.
“Liar.”
“I’m not. I just wanted to know what-”
“Yeah. Yeah.” Jared waved him off. “I’ll see you at lunch or whatever.” He called as they split off to go to their respective second period classes.
He said “or whatever” as if he hadn’t spent the past three years tapping his foot impatiently while he waited for Evan to get out of class so they could go to lunch together. Evan wondered if Jared would ever stop pretending like he didn’t enjoy his company.
Evan forgot about Connor until lunch. He had seen him in the hallway earlier but he couldn’t imagine explaining to Jared what he was doing, and then he got distracted and forgot anyway. He swore that he’d apologize by the end of the day. Even if it meant approaching him in the one class they had together despite the fact that they sat on opposite sides of the room and he’d have to walk over there and people would look at him everyone would hear him make his apology. He really hoped he found Connor before then.
He did not find Connor before then. He left Jared twenty minutes before lunch ended and spent the whole time searching all the less crowded areas of campus but Connor was nowhere to be found. Eventually, Evan gave up and wandered over to Jared’s locker, resolving to catch Connor on the way out of bio.
“Hey.”
Jared eyed him. “Why are you sweating?”
“Oh uh…” Maybe he’d run a bit on the way back from the auditorium but it was only because he didn’t want to be late. “I don’t know. It’s hot.”
“It’s sixty degrees.”
“Shut up.”
Jared snorted. “Someone’s grouchy.”
“I’m not- why do you get to be a dick all the time but when I do it I’m ‘in a mood’ or whatever?”
“Because I’m a dick by nature.” Jared said simply, adjusting his backpack as they started toward the second class they had together. “You are a little bitch by nature. So it’s funny when you get mean.”
“That wasn’t even mean.”
“For you it was.”
Evan sighed in frustration before letting the topic drop.
He and Jared didn’t sit next to each other in history, but Jared did spend every day texting Evan all of the snarky comments he had about whatever they were learning that day. It made the class at least somewhat bearable.
Connor wasn’t in bio. It wasn’t that surprising. He was a notorious ditcher. The only problem was that the longer Evan had to wait to talk to him, the weirder it got. It was already Friday which meant if he didn’t see Connor in the next three minutes he’d have to wait until Monday. Saying ‘hey sorry about yesterday’ is one thing. But ‘hey sorry about four days ago’ was a very different thing. Evan fiddled with his pen as he looked at Connor’s empty seat. Maybe he just wouldn’t address it. Connor probably didn’t care anyway. It’s not like they were friends or anything. By the time they’d see each other again, he’d probably have forgotten all about it.
The bell rang, making up his mind for him. He’d just pretend it didn’t happen.
“Sorry. I had to do something.” Evan explained as he met Jared by his car.
“You say that like I care if I leave without you or not.” Jared snorted, pulling the door open. Despite his claim, he was very obviously waiting for Evan in the parking lot. “Hungry?”
“Um I guess.”
“Good. Cause we’re stopping for food.”
“Okay.”
“Do you think you passed the history test?” Jared asked as he pulled into a parking spot. He was crooked. As always.
“No.” It was stupid and unfair to give a test the first Friday of the school year and Evan stood by that. He didn’t care if he failed. Alright, he cared monumentally if he failed. But that didn’t change the fact that he probably did.
“Me neither.”
“Hey um…” Evan looked at Jared as he paused with his hand on the door handle. “Do you maybe wanna hang out this weekend? My mom works a double so I’m pretty much home alone the whole time.”
Jared hummed as he got out of the car. Evan scrambled to follow him.
“You got alcohol?” Jared asked over his shoulder.
“No.”
“Get some.”
“From where?” Evan rolled his eyes.
“Not my problem.”
Evan sighed. “Sure. I’ll get some.”
“Then I’ll be there.”
He knew he wouldn’t get any alcohol. Jared knew it too. It was just this little routine they had. A game they played. Jared would pretend he was only interested in coming over if they could drink and then he’d show up and there would be no drinking and he’d stay anyway.
Evan knew he’d come over either way but just for once, he wished Jared would just say yes. Without any conditions, real or otherwise.
Jared dropped Evan off after they finished eating and said he’d text later to make plans for the weekend. Evan knew he wouldn’t. He would just show up on Saturday at some point. Evan didn’t mind. He liked that Jared just showed up. It was comfortable that way. There was no need to make plans and set times. Jared would come over once he’d gotten out of bed and that was that.
Evan spent the evening doing homework. Well, he spent the evening at his desk with his homework out, but really, he was watching YouTube videos on his phone. For some reason, watching them on his phone didn’t feel like it counted. If he’d been in bed, watching them on his laptop, well then he would’ve felt guilty for procrastinating. But he wasn’t. He was just watching a quick video on his phone.
Before he realized it, it was late enough for his mom to come home. She poked her head into his room to say hi and ask if he’d had dinner yet. Evan said hi and lied that he had.
He waited until her footsteps faded down the hall before getting up and climbing into bed. Doing homework on a Friday was stupid anyway.