Chapter Text
1. Accept that you want to get better.
When Travis tells him he’s leaving for college Connor is what every loving younger brother should be; proud, but also fully prepared to make fun of Travis. Then it occurs to Connor that without his brother he’s going to be the only head counselor in cabin eleven. Which would normally be fine except for the fact that Connor has already been having a slight mental breakdown about how much pressure it is already. When you take over as co-head of the cabin at 13 you don’t really think of the consequences of your actions. Connor was always just proud that he was able to get all of the kids to sleep every night. Most of the time the schedule for his cabin mates had been: do whatever you want just make sure you cause some chaos. That had all been fine for a while. Travis and he had had a ton of fun wreaking havoc and pranking the other cabins. Sure it wasn’t without its consequences, but a rivalry with the Demeter cabin and all of his clothes being too small was well worth all the laughs he had.
His crisis starts when Katie yells at him after he and Travis pulled a particularly nasty prank on one of the younger Demeter boys.
“You can’t keep doing this to the little ones. Gods, with you two as counselors we’ll have another Castellan trying to destroy the world. Can’t you two idiots take anything seriously?” Katie yells, turns on her heel, and stomps off back to her brother.
Connor is pretty sure that Travis yells something to her retreating back, but he can’t focus on anything after that. Luke’s betrayal had hurt cabin 11 significantly more than it had hurt the rest of the camp, and Connor was not an exception. Luke was his brother and Connor had loved him almost as much as he loved Travis. Luke was one of the first authority figures to treat him kindly. He only laughed off their antics and never once got their names confused. Once for Connor’s birthday, he had sent him a pack of custom M&Ms because he knew Connor loved them.
So losing Luke had hurt more than Connor had words to describe, and Katie implying that his boneheaded actions could make others betray the camp felt the same. The worst part is that in some ways it was true. The gods weren’t perfect parents and Connor knew that. Even if he had no ill will toward his dad, he knew that not every half-blood thought that way. Even Percy who was arguably the favorite demigod of just about everyone in Olympus still had issues with them. Without having a proper support system here at camp it wasn’t exactly out of the realm of possibility that one of the campers could feel the same way that Luke had. Even if they didn’t go to the lengths that Luke had it made Connor sick to his stomach that anyone could feel as angry and hurt as Luke did. So Connor decides then and there that he is going to put in a concentrated effort into being the best head counselor that Camp Half-Blood has ever seen.
As if to add insult to injury it’s Nico DiAngelo who is the one to ask him if he’s alright when he notices Connor has been standing in place staring at the ground. Nico is another great example of how much of a failure Connor is. Connor had only had Nico in his cabin for such a short time when he first arrived but Connor had liked the kid. He was sweet and innocent and most of the time he just wanted to play whatever that card game he liked so much. Connor can’t blame himself for Nico’s sister dying or him being born in a different generation, but he does take credit for the fact that Nico stayed away for so long. When Nico had come out to everyone he had made it pretty clear that he didn’t think that people at Camp Half-Blood would be accepting of him. That was why he had stayed away from everyone and lived with his father instead of staying at camp.
The fact that Connor hadn’t made Nico feel welcome enough at camp made Connor feel like the lowest scum on earth. Connor should know better than that. Hell Connor had gone through the same thing as Nico when he was around Nico’s age. Luckily, Connor had had his brother and his mom who were both more than wonderful about the whole thing. Travis constantly joked that the best way to tell them apart was Travis would only check out girls while Connor was interested in anybody. Nico didn’t have a support system and Connor wasn’t a good enough counselor to provide one for him.
So now Travis was leaving him all on his own to ruin the next generation of half-bloods. Great, he could do this… probably. He just needed to make a plan. Connor ducks into the Athena cabin that he knows is empty at this time of day. All he needs to do is make a plan to be a good camp counselor. He grabs an empty notebook and pen from the Athena cabin and opens it to the first page. Ok so maybe stealing from the Athena cabin doesn’t exactly fall under the whole trying to be a better person thing but hey he’s only just beginning. On the first page, he writes Connor Stoll’s Guide to being a good camp counselor. Number one: Accept that you want to get better.
‘Alright,’ Connor thinks, ‘Let’s do this thing’.
1. Break up with your girlfriend because you realize you’re gay.
Jason Grace loves Piper with his whole heart, sort of. He loves Piper, he really does. He thinks she’s funny, and smart, and looks like she belongs in a vogue magazine. The problem is that these are also all things he could say about his sister. Nico is the one that breaks it to him. Well not really, because Nico didn’t just come out and say “hey man I think you’re not attracted to women.” Honestly, it would have been much easier for Jason if Nico had done it that way. Instead, he just talked about how he feels about Will and how different it is from pretending to be attracted to girls.
Something about the word pretending had stuck with Jason. Was that what he was doing? Just pretending to be attracted to Piper. It had just been so easy for him to say he was. After all, anyone on earth could see that Piper was beautiful even if she tried to hide it with her chunky hair and baggy clothes. Jason had liked the baggy clothes, even if Leo sometimes teased her that she dressed like a boy. Ok, maybe that should have been his first clue, but it was just simple to be with Piper. It was obvious that Piper liked him and she was exactly the type of person everyone assumed a person like Jason would like, even himself. So, he just goes with it. Except now he can’t just keep going on like this.
Jason and Piper had already decided they were going to stay in Piper’s dad’s beach house on long island for a couple of days before camp started so they could spend some time together. Piper had specifically called it alone time in a voice that made Jason feel the panic rise in this throat. So, when he gets out of the cab at Piper’s house, he knows he must look tense. Apparently, Piper doesn’t notice while she grabs the bags out of the trunk. Jason takes both his and Piper’s because even if he was about to break her heart he was still going to be a gentleman about it. He shoulders the bags and heads up to the large house that is meant to be theirs for the week before returning to Camp Half-Blood.
Jason really misses camp. He keeps thinking about how badly he wants to see all of his friends and be able to just have fun. Speaking of his friends he really needs to call Nico and let him know that he got to the east coast safely. He knows that Nico isn’t really worried, but he just needs to talk to someone who will understand what he’s going through right now. He drops the bags on the couch and heads out to the back garden to find a hose.
He grabs a coin from his bag and tosses it in, “Nico DiAngelo at Camp Half-Blood please Lady Iris.”
Nico appears in the spray, “Jason did you guys make it here ok?”
“Yeah the plane ride was fine and we just got to the house,” Jason says while listening to the sound of Piper putting her clothes away upstairs.
“Have you um” Nico waves his hands like he doesn’t quite know how to say it.
“No, not yet. That’s why I called. I’m sorta freaking out,” Jason sinks his teeth into his bottom lip out of worry.
“Hey, Piper’s a good person I’m sure she’ll understand. She was fine with me when I came out,” Nico picks at the black nail polish on his fingers and Jason hears Will scolding him about it in the background.
“Well this is different,” Jason wants to snap at Nico, but he knows it’s not his fault.
“Jason, you have to calm down or you’re going to have a panic attack,” Will says, his face coming into view as he presses into Nico’s side.
“I mean how do you even tell someone that you can’t date them anymore because you realized you’re gay and you guys only got together because your goldy stepmom was trying to save the world and also ruin your life?” Jason asks.
Jason hears the door slam behind him, “Well it would help by saying it to her face instead of behind her back.”
A lot of things happen all at once. Nico is grabbing Will’s arm and pulling him out of frame. The little shit didn’t even say goodbye. Not that it would even matter because Jason has dropped the hose he was holding. Piper steps out into the garden fully with her arms crossed. Jason can tell she’s on the verge of tears. It’s the same face she would make whenever anyone would mention Leo’s name after they had thought he had died. Jason feels the hose spray his entire lap and land on his shoes. Well if that isn’t an insult to injury.
“Jason I think you should go,” Piper says, squaring her shoulders.
“Piper wait-”
“Jason I love you, but you need to go,” Piper is fully crying now and Jason has never felt so much shame in his life.
“I didn’t mean for it to go like this,” he pleads.
“You didn’t really think you could just break up with me and then stay at my house right?” Piper asks.
Ok, maybe he hadn’t thought that one through, “Pipes, please. Let’s at least talk about this.”
“Go,” There’s charm-speak in her voice that time and even if there wasn’t Jason knows when he’s not wanted.
“I love you and I’m sorry,” he says as he grabs his bag and heads out the door.
“I know. I’ll see you next week alright?” She kisses his cheek and lightly pushes him out the door.
As it shuts behind him, he hears a choked sob from behind the door. It’s almost enough for him to turn back around. Almost. He holds his bag close to his chest and takes off into the air. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he hopes that the air will dry his pants and wet shoes. Sadly camp isn’t far enough for Jason to feel any drier. So when he sees the golden fleece that once saved his sister he’s still soaking wet from the waist down.
The walk over the hill is a silent one and during that time Jason can slowly feel the events of the last twenty minutes start to weigh on him. He just needs to find Nico and Will and maybe put on some dry pants and everything will be alright. Of course, this plan all goes down the drain when he nearly runs into Connor Stoll from the Hermes cabin. Connor is carrying a huge stack of paper, a bucket of markers, and what looks like a metric ton of glitter. All of this is piled well above his head and Jason is sure he can’t see where he’s going.
“Um, do you need help?” Jason cocks his head at the sight of the demigod peaking around his pile.
“Oh my gods, yes. Thank you so much. You have no idea how hard it is to carry all of this stuff without a second pair of hands. I could kiss you right now!” Jason can tell he’s blushing but he quickly grabs half of the things out of Connor’s hands.
Connor nods his head toward the Hermes cabin and Jason follows behind him hoping to ensure that Connor can’t see what a mess he is right now. It works for the most part and Jason is feeling so confident in his ability to look put together that he decides to ask Connor why he seems to have raided a crafting store.
“So who’s the victim?” Jason asks as they pass by his own cabin.
“Huh?” Connor asks, looking genuinely confused.
“You have glitter and other random supplies. I figured you were pulling a welcome back prank,” Jason says like it’s obvious. He’s only been here for a little bit, but he knows enough about the Stoll brothers to know they’re always planning something.
“Oh um no. I’m actually making welcome back cards. Oh and a schedule board and a chore chart. If I finish those before everyone gets here hopefully I can make little nameplates for everyone’s beds,” Connor looks so excited about this that Jason is taken aback, “Oh shoot wait do you think that everyone would rather make their own nameplate? I wouldn’t want them to have to deal with my poor handwriting and everything.”
They’ve made it to Cabin Eleven and Jason is surprised by the look of concern on Connor’s face about his nameplates. As Jason follows him in he tries his best to think of a way to get a smile back on the guy's face.
“Well, I bet getting everyone together to do it would be a fun bonding experience. That way everyone can put their own creative spin on it,” Jason hopes that’s the right answer.
“That’s a great idea! Maybe the other cabins will want to get involved too!” Connor bounces on his feet as he plops all of the supplies on his bed gesturing for Jason to do the same, “Hey your girlfriend is head of the Aphrodite Cabin right? Do you think she would want to join in?”
Uh oh. Jason’s crying. Which honestly, he should have seen that coming. Connor, however, didn’t see this coming, and his brown eyes widen in shock. Apparently, Connor is just now noticing how much of a mess Jason is because his eyes dart down to his soaked pants and shoes and back up to his face where his glasses have spilled tears clouding them.
“Oh fuck ok uh. Did I say something to upset you? You can make your own nameplate too! Or I can make you one. We can do it in your favorite color which is, um, shit I don’t know your favorite color. Is it blue? You seem like a blue kinda guy. Not Percy level but. Anyway uh please stop crying? Shit ok, that wasn’t the thing to say, I mean um. Is there anything I can do to make you feel better right now?” Connor seems to be panicking, but he must be smarter than Jason because he runs to the door and shouts for Nico.
Jason feels sorry for the guy. He doesn’t deserve to deal with a disaster like Jason right now. All he was trying to do was make some arts and crafts for his siblings. Jason hears him shout Nico’s name a few more times and then comes back over to Jason. He quietly takes Jason’s hand and leads him to sit on the bed. Connor quickly sits next to him and begins rubbing small circles into his back. This starts Jason off on another crying spree, but Connor doesn’t stop his movements.
Connor only does this for a few minutes before Nico enters the cabin. Even though Jason has his head in his hands he recognizes the way Nico sighs and knows that the footsteps walking toward him belong to the younger boy. Nico grabs Jason’s bag from where he left it by the bed and reaches his hand out to place it on Jason’s shoulder.
“Hey, Jason,” Nico says softly, “want to come eat ice cream with me and Will? I bet if I ask nicely right now Connor will let us use one of the iPods I know he has hidden and we can watch a movie or something.”
Through his tears, he can see Nico shoot a glare at Connor who immediately springs up and grabs an iPod from under his bed. Nico takes it from him and Connor stands silently seemingly unsure what to do now that Nico has arrived. Jason looks up and mouths a thank you to Connor before walking out of the cabin with Nico. Jason sees Connor wave from the doorway but is quickly distracted by Will holding out two pints of ice cream. Will hands him the fudge brownie one and Jason begins to try and erase this whole day from his brain.