Chapter Text
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Izuku sat up sharply, coughing a bit as his eyes fluttered open. He’d woken up on the couch in the common room, papers sprawled across the coffee table. He glanced down at his phone, eyes fuzzy from sleep.
12:24AM
So, he’d fallen asleep while working... To be fair, he’d been trying his best to stay in a routine, waking up along with his classmates, but he’d been up a bit later than he would have liked the night before. He ran his fingers over the bandages that covered his arms absentmindedly, giving himself a moment to wake up fully, then stood. The floor creaked as he made his way towards the kitchen, and he grunted as he reached for a glass. His hands lingered for a moment before grabbing a second, filling them both with water.
Taking a shaky breath, he was tapping Katsuki’s door with his knuckle lightly, glass of water in hand. They hadn’t spoken much in the past few months, and it was eating away at him bit by bit. He 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸 Bakugo would never be quick to spill his thoughts, but something was better than nothing. Izuku couldn’t quite say it wasn’t his own fault they hadn’t spoken, because 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘢𝘺? After everything... he hadn’t even said thank you. Even if he did, Bakugo would rattle off something about how it wasn’t needed — and perhaps that’s why Izuku stayed silent. He wanted Bakugo to 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 him. Or 𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 he just wanted to hear the blonde’s voice at that moment. 𝘑𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘩𝘦'𝘴 𝘰𝘬𝘢𝘺, he nodded to himself. 𝘈𝘴 𝘰𝘬𝘢𝘺 𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘣𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘸𝘢𝘺.
“Bakugo— I brought you some water... I, uh— thought you might be thirsty and I was getting myself some so I 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵-" He realized he’d been rambling through the door, and then he was cutting himself off, careful not to annoy the blonde headed boy... if he was even listening.
In hindsight, Katsuki should’ve been asleep hours ago. As usual, the blonde had made the trek back to his room at 8pm, even sliding back beneath the covers of his bed at 8:32pm on the dot... But he couldn’t sleep, not without a lack of trying. His expression was unreadable, clear of most of the anger and fury he wore during the day, around his classmates. He wasn’t in a place where he had to guard his emotions, where he had to keep his usual demeanor under wraps, no. It was part of the reason he stayed in his room more often than he once did. Save for Kirishima, he didn’t think he could handle pretending around anyone else. Sure, he was still as angry as ever, but there was more to that now, too.
He glanced down at his bare chest, at the bandages adorning his lower abdomen. He still remembered it like it was yesterday, how his legs had moved before his mind could even comprehend what was happening. Katsuki could’ve died that day. He knew that with startling clarity, and he’d known it the moment those spindles were jettisoning through his stomach. He’d known, and yet... he didn’t regret it. Even now, when he was frustrated and he didn’t know what to do about it, he still didn’t regret it.
𝘈𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘋𝘦𝘬𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘥𝘯’𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘵. That was what he kept repeating in his mind.
The sound of light knocking pulled Katsuki out of his spiraling thoughts, the male slowly lifting from his bed. His wounds were still sensitive across his chest, so it took him a second, but then he’d move towards the door. He knew who it was before the idiot even began rambling on. A sigh parted Katsuki’s lips, the blonde weighing his options for a moment. He could pretend to be asleep, but he knew Deku would just stand out there until he actually opened up. And he’d likely just continue with the rambling in the meantime... That was why his door began to slowly creak open, the blonde assessing him silently for a moment.
“Fucking get in here,” he murmured, barely saying anything else before he moved back into his room. That was the only opening the other was going to get from him.
Izuku sighed in relief, slipping through the door quietly and making his way to Bakugo’s end table, sitting the glass down. It was silent for a moment, and Izuku watched as a bead of condensation trailed its way down the side of the glass. It seemed to linger for a moment before joining with another droplet- and the two cascaded down the glass as one. He swallowed nervously, turning to Bakugo. His eyes shifted from one bandage to another, knowing just how uncomfortable they were in the way they stuck to your skin.
It’s because of you, the greenette’s mind reminded him. He shook the thoughts away.
“How... are you doing?” He started, looking down toward his feet. There were so many things he longed to say, but even in his head, he couldn’t seem to form the words.
I’m sorry.
Thank you.
Why does it feel even more awkward than usual?
I miss you.
Izuku’s brows dug together and he finally convinced himself to bring his gaze to Katsuki’s if only for a moment. Silence stretched on, Katsuki staring at his bed all the while. If Deku didn't know what to say then it was no surprise that the blonde was struggling. After everything that had happened, what even was there to say?
The moment Deku began however, Katsuki turned slowly to look him over brow raised skeptically. The urge to be a smartass was right on the tip of his tongue, begging to be spat into the other's face, but what good would that do?
How the hell do you think I am, dumbass?
"Just fucking peachy," he finally settled on, hating the way his stomach lurched when their eyes met. Regret and longing settled into the pit of his stomach, only serving to irritate the male further. He was supposed to shut these emotions down, and he'd resigned himself to that the moment he spoke with All Might... so why couldn't he commit? He knew why, deep down, but he was afraid to admit what it meant.
"You look like you're healing up pretty well," he commented offhandedly, glancing out towards the balcony.
He didn't miss the relief settling in his stomach at that.
Izuku huffed a small laugh at his sarcasm, because it was just what he expected— but at least he asked. At least Katsuki knew he cared. He wandered a bit closer. Izuku was pretty in tune with his emotions for the most part, and often knew exactly how he felt or what he wanted. With Katsuki, it was.... fuzzy . Even so, he’d never even thought about what his life would be like without him, without knowing he was somewhere, marching on with his usual sarcasm and bite that Izuku secretly found endearing.
The world would be very cold if Katsuki wasn’t in it, Izuku decided, and he felt his eyes sting a little, because even just thinking about it made his heart drop. He blinked it away, because if he cried, he would surely be kicked out.
“I’m feeling better every day, really.” His voice was a bit quieter than he normally tended to be. He blamed it on the hour. His hand wandered up, thumb ghosting over the corner of one of Katsuki’s bandages— it had started to peel— and he was careful not to put too much pressure as he encouraged it to stick again. At times like these, he wished he could just spit everything out. Every passing thought, every lingering feeling in his chest and stomach. Make words of them, and speak. It was touch and go with him sometimes, and he didn’t want to shove him away. Katsuki’s patience was thin normally, and he couldn’t tell if it was better or worse at the moment.
“Hey, I’m-" Izuku choked, throat betraying him like he knew it would.
Just let it go. Spit it out.
“I’m sorry. And thank you. I’m really... glad I still have you and you’re okay, as okay as you can be- I don’t think I would have known what to do with myself if you- I just-“ He took a shaky breath, trying to formulate his words a bit better. He knew Bakugo hated the rambling.
“I just need you to be here because sometimes you’re the only thing that keeps me from drifting away .”
He immediately regretted that one— it sounded vague and he didn’t like that.
It was a fleeting sensation, the touch of Deku’s finger trailing up to fix his bandage, but it was one Katsuki felt all the same. He only barely stopped himself from lurching hard against the contact, too, if only for the fact that he wasn’t a physical person. At least... not in these sorts of situations. Beating someone down with his fists, he could handle any day. It was emotion, genuine touches of affection that he wasn’t sure how to handle.
Ironic, given the fact that the other was practically made up of those.
Truthfully the blonde had tuned the first portion of Deku’s ramblings out, given the fact that he’d heard them hundreds of times before this. How he was thankful for Katsuki jumping in, how he was sorry it had come to that, how —
Wait, what ?
Immediately Katsuki turned, staring down at the other with wide eyes, lips barely parted in surprise. His words, spoken in the midst of that flurry of information... but out of everything that had been said, the blonde knew that those were the most genuine of the bunch. That did nothing to help the confusing bundle of emotions welling up inside of him, however. Silence stretched on once again, Katsuki’s expression contemplative as he looked over the other. It was funny how his own interpretations of Deku’s comment rang true, how if not for the broccoli headed nerd standing before him... he probably wouldn’t be who he was. Who he is now. And he knew he wasn’t great by any means, but he was trying to be better .
“The hell did you mean by that?” He finally questioned, his tone harsh but strangely soft. Of course he’d want the other to elaborate, now that it was out in the open like it was.
Izuku was glowing red, and he knew he wasn’t exactly going to dig himself out of an explanation. Not that he minded, but it was Katsuki’s reaction he’d be worried about. His eyes locked onto red ones and he felt his insides coil. The blonde looked like his words had stuck- maybe a bit too well. His head jerked away, looking down at his feet once more. He pressed his pointer finger to his chin, giving his brain a chance to catch up with the situation.
“Well.” He turned to face Katsuki again, and thankfully, the redness in his cheeks was but a gentle glow by then.
“If I think of my life- our lives now... compared to when we were kids, I think mostly everything has changed. Things have been incredibly good, and I’ve been blessed more times than I can count. Things have also been tragic . Always changing. Even you... but you’re the one thing that’s been constant. You’ve always been there. So you keep me grounded in a way that I don’t really think anything else can, if that makes sense.”
His voice shook, but he was able to get it out without crying, heaven forbid.
“So you keep me from drifting away, yeah. And when I thought for a second- that you might...”
Oh boy, don’t cry now. He cleared his throat, turning his whole body sharply to face messy blonde hair.
“When you were in the hospital, I stayed with you every day. There was a time when... I let myself indulge a thought that you might not wake up. So I held onto you, because it felt like I was going to evaporate. So I’m not thanking you for saving me every time I say it.. I’m thanking you for holding me down, too.”
If this were any other time Katsuki might've interrupted him in the midst of this lengthy explanation, throwing some snide comment his way for being too sappy. But not this time, not when the gravity of what almost occurred hung heavy in the air.
Truthfully, Katsuki himself didn't think he'd wake from that coma. He'd assumed he'd finally overdone it, finally made that move that cost him his life. And while he was understandably scared for what that meant… he didn't regret it. The choice he made, the instinctual movement to jump in the way of that attack… he knew he would've done it again without a second thought. The more Deku explained, the more Katsuki realized that it was for the same reasons. He didn't think he could exist in a world where the cheerful nerd before him didn't, and it was that realization that now had him so messed up in the head. He knew, no matter how much he threatened the greenette, no matter how much he got on his nerves… Not having him there wouldn't be the same.
"Tch," he finally scoffed, unable to formulate actual words just yet. His throat felt constricted, emotions he didn't want to deal with threatening to overflow, and it'd likely show in the glassiness of his burning crimson gaze.
"You've always been such a fucking sap, Deku," he finally managed to speak, stepping closer towards the other. His hands were clenched into fists at his sides, though they trembled with the urge to reach out. "You and I both know I'm made of stronger stuff, that I can handle shit like that."
His jaw clenched, the blonde's next line all but coming out in a whisper:
"If it'd been you… I couldn't let that happen."
I couldn’t live without you.
Izuku listened patiently, and he understood. He wrapped his arms around himself, fingertips pressing into his sides sharply. He couldn’t afford to let his body move on its own right now, not between Katsuki’s injuries, nevermind his own, and the fact that he knew he would be pushed away. He shivered, but not from any particular cold. He wanted to badly to let go. To hold onto Katsuki so that he would know it was real, he was there, he was talking and listening . To sob onto his shoulder about I can’t imagine if you weren’t here, you’re my best friend even if I’m not yours -
His hand wandered away from his side, trembling as it reached out for a brief moment, fingers curling. His eyes met with glassy red ones, and his hand dropped back at his side.
“I think I know what you mean better than anyone else.”
He offered a warm smile as he turned towards the balcony.
“I just wish this was easier. Trying to- I don’t know, talk to you?” He laughed weakly, and sniffled. Maybe if he just ignored the tears that stung his eyes, Katsuki would too. He shut them, sighing.
“I just miss you sometimes."
Any other day would've seen the blonde pushing this aside, pushing Deku out of his room like he hadn't just heard the other pour their heart out to him. But this wasn't a normal situation, and Katsuki wasn't in his usual element. Everything was so raw, so overwhelming, that Katsuki couldn't bring himself to simply kick the other out after so much had been said.
Even he wasn't that heartless.
His gaze followed Deku as he turned, brows furrowing into a deep line as he did so. To hear him speak in such a manner only served to confuse him further.
Best Friend .
I miss you .
None of it made sense to him.
"I was awful to you back then," he finally responded, his voice breaking as he relived his past. Remembering every harsh word, every thrown fist, everything he'd done to the other. "I treated you like you were fucking nothing, Deku. Lower than dirt, and yet… you still make it sound like I'm your friend. I don't fucking get it."
Katsuki moved until he was right behind the other, a hand reaching up to touch the bandages over his chest.
"Even before this happened," he continued, "you never once treated me like I treated you. And fuck if I didn't deserve it. So… why? Why the hell do I still matter to you after all the shit I did?"
Izuku spun towards him again, jolting a bit at the lack of space between them. He watched Katsuki’s hand as it moved across the bandages. The turmoil is his brain was visible on his expression if you could read it correctly, and he dug his nails into his side again.
Because I love you .
“Does there 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 to be a reason you matter to me?”
He’d never outright said it before, and regardless of how you read into it, it was just as genuine.
I love you.
I love you.
"𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶."
It came out almost as a groan, as if it pained him to say it — as if it was a struggle to keep it from spewing out. He couldn’t decide if he regretted it or not — at face value, it was a simple admission, and one that he felt like was obvious. What other reason might he have for putting up with everything, for chasing after him still? It wasn’t like he meant it in one specific way- he really did consider the blonde his best friend, and of course that meant he loved him. He loved all his friends.
He loved Katsuki the most, though, but he couldn’t even admit that to himself. Not without opening several cans of worms.
“You don’t have to respond to that.” He mumbled, and his cheeks fired again, head dropping. His breath quickened a bit, lip trembling in fear that he’d definitely just gotten himself kicked out and earned the awkward silent treatment.
𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶.
Words he truthfully never expected to hear from the other, especially after all he'd put him through, but at the same time a part of Katsuki wasn't surprised at all. Why the hell else would Deku have put up with so much, even if he'd gotten a little better over the years? Emotions swirled, rearing their ugly heads once again as Katsuki stared down the other, stunned to silence for an immeasurable amount of time. Even if the words had been said he couldn't very well assume Deku meant what he 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 he meant, the blonde doing his best to shut down the hope that blossomed in his chest along with the pain and regret.
The idiot loved all of his friends, and Katsuki was just another friend. That's all it was, all it could be. He hated how much that realization disappointed him.
"You shouldn't," Katsuki murmured, voice so low it barely echoed past his lips. The trembling was back, taking advantage of the blonde's shock to grip him with guilt and anxiety. "I sure as fuck don't deserve it, so why even fucking bother."
His gaze lowered, missing the cherry tints to the other's countenance as a result, but Katsuki couldn't bring himself to keep looking up. The wounds in his chest were still festering, but they were nothing to the ache that now settled in his heart.
" I don’t deserve you.”
Izuku’s face twisted, lips trembling once more. The weight in the pit of his stomach seemed heavy enough that he thought the floor might cave through. A trembling hand reached forward, and before he could overthink it, he traced a finger over the edge Katsuki’s bandage, then another, letting himself time to form a response.
“That doesn’t matter, either. I forgive you .”
He had the absolute nerve to let a breathy laugh slip through his lips, and he pressed them together tightly after, shaking his head. So many emotions, so many thoughts were built up inside him that begged for release. It felt like if he didn’t let them out sooner or later, he’d simply combust.
“You nearly gave your life for mine. You don’t have to say it, because I know.”
His hand lingered over Katsuki’s heart for a moment. He placed his palm flat against the warm skin.
“How could I not love you?”
Katsuki hated the choked sound that escaped him, the way those words tore through his chest and left him feeling more exposed than he had in years.
I forgive you.
It was like the floodgates had been opened, the emotions that he'd been battling finally coming to a head.The blonde stepped close enough for his arms to wrap around the other, crushing him to his chest without an ounce of respite. Sure, his bandages protested and his wounds screamed out in pain, but this was better than allowing the greenette to see the tears beginning to trickle down his face.
"You're a fucking idiot," Katsuki remarked, his voice thick with the emotion he felt. "Anybody else would've kicked me to the curb ages ago, but you... You're too fucking stubborn for your own good. Too fucking good..."
The last remark wasn't meant to be said aloud, Katsuki so overrun by his emotions that he didn't even notice it all that much, but it was clear as day what he meant, what he felt in that moment. In the midst of all of his sorrow and guilt, he'd never felt so much relief before in his life. At least there was someone who could forgive him, if not himself.
Izuku was more than shocked at first, and even more so when Katsuki began to speak, but even so he managed to squirm his arms free, wrapping them around the other and letting his thumbs ghost circles on his shoulder blades. He hoped so deeply in his soul that somehow, the way he felt could be translated through his affections, because it was so much easier than speaking it. It was like the places their bodies collided zapped with static, tingly and warm and safe. He wondered if it was just him— it had to be, right?
He let out a few blubbery giggles, sniffling a bit.
“I’ll say it as many times as you need to hear it, you know. I really do forgive you. For everything.” He pressed his cheek into the shoulder of the warm embrace that surrounded him.
Bliss.
He felt some of the weight free from his shoulders and the pit of his stomach, but something there still twisted and flipped. He couldn’t get too ahead of himself — it 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘺 wasn’t like that, right?
Like what ? He didn’t even know what his own thoughts meant. All he knew is that Katsuki’s embrace was definitely something he was very lucky to experience, and he didn’t want to let go. He couldn’t help but repeat himself,
“I forgive you. I love you.”
Silence washed over the blonde at that, the constant reassurance warming him deep down in the pit of his stomach and leaving him with a state of contentment unlike anything he'd ever felt before. The contact, the skin to skin, was foreign but so right... it felt like it grounded him.He'd been so close to losing it that, so close even now, and as usual in swept Deku to turn the tides and bring him back. He really was so damn lucky the nerd was so compassionate.
He leaned forward, resting his chin atop the other's head, his watery eyes drifting closed amidst the affection. It could've meant so many things, and Katsuki hoped deep down that it meant something more than just the norm that he'd share with anyone else, but even so the blonde tried to remain rooted to reality. Deku was openly affectionate with his friends... that's all this was, all it could be. Even if the gentle touch of his hand felt so intimate, or the way Deku leaned into him like he was their lifeline as well.
The hope that it meant more was threatening to swallow him whole once again, but he had to do what he could to keep his composure.
"Thank you," Katsuki whispered, surprisingly out of character given his usual demeanor, but he couldn't help the gratitude seeping from him in that moment. His hold tightened slightly, guiding the other closer while his marred fingers traced patterns into his shirt.
"You're still the biggest idiot I know, but... thank you."
He wished he could say more, that he could say what he needed to say, but the words wouldn't come out. He didn't want to ruin the moment, he couldn't live with himself if it came to that... it wasn't like he gave himself often to feel so strongly after all.
Izuku let out another gentle laugh, hooking his arms together like he was going to be pried away at any moment. It didn’t even register in his mind when his lips pursed into a small kiss against Katsuki’s shoulder, and it wasn’t something he thought about doing— he was too elated to process anything but hug. Hugging Katsuki. Warm. Love.
He stiffened just so slightly when it did hit him, though, but tried to relax, squeezing his eyes shut and waiting. Maybe he didn’t notice? If he did, maybe he could play dumb, or maybe Katsuki wouldn’t acknowledge it. Wishful thinking, maybe.
Maybe it would be.. okay ?
“Your idiot."
It was a faint whisper, quiet as a mouse, but he knew he would be heard.
Once again silence met the greenette, his soft-spoken comment shaking the blonde down to his very core.
Your idiot.
His heart clenched painfully in his chest, the hope seeping through the cracks before he could stop it. It felt like a confession of sorts, like an admittance that was struggling to be heard, but was he misconstruing it? Deku was, unsurprisingly, a loving soul, and it showed in everything that he did. But if Katsuki was being honest... he’d never seen him like this with anyone else. Was it okay to let that hope take the reins?
That tiny moment of contact was what broke the blonde, his hold tightening, as if he was afraid he’d blink and Deku would be gone. That kiss, though featherlight, froze the male in place like he’d been weighted down with cement, his heart thundering in his chest as he forced his mouth to work.
“. . . Yeah,” he finally responded, his tone soft. Almost affectionate, strangely enough. “You got that right.”
A hand lifted, slowly reaching up to tangle into the greenette’s soft locks, pulling him closer still if at all possible. Lips hesitating, his own possessive admittance right on the tip of his tongue, but he couldn’t bring himself to say the words as easily as the other had. Especially if he truly was just being hopeful.
“Not like I’d let anyone else claim that title, anyway.”
Izuku leaned back to look at him, adding that his list to possible mistakes. His face twisted with confusion, almost hurt - eyes stinging again. He reached up with one hand, keeping the other firmly wrapped around the blonde, and gripped his sleeve to wipe the blonde's cheeks.
“Is this really happnening ?” Izuku was nearly hysterical. He was so afraid that he’d wake up- that it was a dream. That he made it all up in his head, once again. He’d considered all those dreams nightmares, only because he would never see them come to fruition- or so he thought.
This surely wouldn’t end the same way as his dreams, it couldn’t. He would dream of a Bakugo who spoke to him in the tone that made his soul simply melt through his heels, who wrapped his arms around him without a hint of disgust on his face. They would fall asleep, Izuku held in warm arms. It was a nightmare, and Izuku knew that when he’d wake in a cold bed, only holding himself. Pitiful, really.
He choked, squeezing his eyes shut and burying his face back in the blonde's shoulder. His arms wrapped high around Katsuki’s shoulders, nails pressing into them like a kitten who didn’t quite know how to retract its claws yet.
“I don’t want to wake up this time.”
The realization that their hopes were the same was what really did Katsuki in, the emotion resting upon the other's expression so vivid that it had his heart clenching painfully in his chest. So many evenings he'd been plagued with dreams of occurrences painstakingly similar to this, down to the sensation of the greenette's lips against his skin.
Was this just another part of his twisted fantasy?
"Quit your blubbering, dumbass," Katsuki finally managed to blurt out, his hand remaining in the other's hair once he burrowed back against him. The blonde's burning gaze ached with unshed tears, yearning to be let loose despite his stubborn afflictions. He blamed it on Deku's sniveling, not that he was just as distraught.
"This is really fucking happening, so get a grip," he barked out, though whether it was more for the other or himself was up in the air. All Katsuki knew was that one of them needed to get a grip... not that that was going to happen. His grip tightened within those soft green locks, offering more grounding, hopefully clueing Deku in to the reality of the situation. He wasn't alone, neither of them were. Not this time.
"I ain't letting you walk away until you fucking calm down."
As if he had any intention to let him walk away anyway.
It took a few moments, but after a while of silence on Izuku’s end other than the occasional chirp or sniffle, he relaxed against the blonde. He focused on the warm that seemed to radiate into his very being, the fingers tangled tightly in his hair, the sound of a steady heartbeat. He took a few deep shaky breaths, leaning backward again and staring up to him with wide eyes, ones that seemed to be confirming he was still there.
His eyelids fluttered a few times, cheeks heating as the gravity of the situation settled in.
“You’re really pretty.” He murmured, smiling lazily, head tilting off to one side, admiring from another angle. He’d cried himself out, clearly .
Izuku had craved this for entirely too long to put the restrain on himself he probably should. It was probably due to the lack of sleep, too, which he was a little grateful for. It was definitely much easier to just let things like that out, because the shyness lessened a bit. He felt bolder.
“I- love... you.” He chirped breathy giggles between his words.
Had the situation been any different, Katsuki would've assumed the other just flipped their lid and went batshit bonkers. Though thankfully for him, they both seemed to be in that state of haziness, Katsuki unable to hold back a soft chuckle at the other's words.
Pretty. Not something Katsuki heard often, especially not in this sort of situation.
His gaze softened as he took in the sight of the other, silently marveling at the light that still seemed to glitter in his green eyes as he stared up at the other. Katsuki's hand moved, sliding down from his hair to gently cup his cheek. He was making sure this was actually happening, as well, after all.
"And you've cried yourself into fucking hysterics," he commented wryly, though he leaned closer, his lips so close to Deku's forehead. Four words, featherlight in their delivery, wafted over his skin, though only just loud enough to be heard:
"Love you too, y’nerd ..."
Izuku felt his chest tighten, and he almost broke out into sobs again— luckily for Bakugo, he was able to contain himself. Or maybe he just didn’t have any tears left. He slid his hand up Katsuki’s forearm, resting overtop of his calloused hand for a moment before tangling his fingers through the blondes.
“You love me? You love me." He confirmed with himself, eyes meeting Katsuki’s once again. As badly as he wanted to lean forward and press his lips against the ones that brushed his skin, he slowed himself down. Things already felt like they were moving fast, and it was perfect... but he didn’t want to push it. He tugged him gently towards the bed, pulling him into the sheets carefully. He didn’t want to hurt him, and he was as cautious as he could be in his state.
There was something about the whole situation that had Izuku giddy, like a child who’d finally gotten to open the biggest present under the tree on Christmas, and even giddier when it turned out to be exactly what they’d wanted. In his gut, though, he felt a pang of worry. What now ? What would happen? Where would they go from there?
He pulled the blanket over the two of them, and was immediately flooded with the smell of Katsuki that lingered in his sheets. Maybe he did die there, and this was heaven. He scolded himself for such a brutal thought. In truth, he was fully prepared to wake in his own bed- alone, just like before.
“Can you hold me? Just for a while.”
He didn’t exactly wait for a response, turning to face him and taking the responsibility of tangling their legs. His fingers found their way to the bandages once more, tracing them absentmindedly.
“Hey, Kacchan?”
Even if Katsuki wanted to fight him--which for once he didn't--he came right along at the gentlest of tugs, falling into place beside Deku within his bed. How many dreams had he endured of this very thing happening, of the two of them finally closing that distance... only to have it ripped away when his alarm clock woke him?
Too many to dwell on now.
The sensation of his fingers brushing over skin definitely was a comfort Katsuki hadn't expected to receive, his eyes closing as his arms engulfed the other cautiously. Digits traced through his shirt, a low rumble being met as the blonde looked down upon the other. He wasn't sure why, but he suddenly felt so sleepy...
"Yeah?"
Izuku’s eyes had fallen shut, his hand falling still against Katsuki’s chest as his breath steadied out to a slow rhythm. He’d fallen asleep sooner than he could get a response out, much to his dismay, because the desire to soak the moment in before it disappeared was all he wanted. His nose twitched a bit and he stirred, pressing himself closer.
Izuku slept better than ever before that night.
--
Unfortunately, it wasn’t the gentle rays of sunshine that peered through the curtains that awoke Izuku- but frantic knocking. He sat up quickly, hand cupping his heart. Eyes flicking around sharply, it hit him- he was in Katsuki’s bed. Lying next to him.
Oh my god it’s real. Oh my god.
There was no time to soak it in, though, and he shook Katsuki gently. He took a mental note to admire the sleepy blonde the next time he got the chance, tucking it away.
“Kacchan- hey-!” He whispered, trying to keep his voice calm to not startle him.
“Someone is at the door !"